Nozomi and Kibou hadn't made it out.
The fire wasn't an accident.
There was a third corpse, charred but recognisable.
Not that Shikamaru recognised him. Though from his attire, the Nara guessed that he and Neji hadn't been successful in ensuring that their enemies had all been eliminated.
Shikamaru could already deduce what had happened: someone from the gang had survived, came to the safe house and set it on fire.
And he had also come up with a few reasons as to why it happened.
The first one that came to mind was revenge – someone wanted payback for his dead teammates. And if that was the case, Shikamaru could only think that Rai – water element guy who apparently had something going on with wind element girl – was the culprit since Neji was the one who gave the fatal blow to his girlfriend. Furthermore, Jounins were adept at utilising at least two elements so it wasn't a surprise if Rai had fire affinity as well. And well, drenching wood in water obviously wasn't going to get his point across.
The second reason, which Shikamaru really didn't want to entertain, was that the gang had really been after the Kieuses and the survivor had come to finish off the job. Or perhaps someone new had been sent. But that led to a web of other questions that was too troublesome to think about so he didn't delve too deeply into it. Not for the time being at least.
As for the villagers, well, no one actually noticed anything. Sakura and Ino had managed to put out so of the fire, and the following storm took care of the rest. But naturally they had to inform Heiwa-san and the Elders. Which led to another troublesome meeting.
Apparently, none of the villagers were aware of the Kieuses' presence in the village as Heiwa-san had kept it a secret for the safety of the villagers. Shikamaru had thought that the meeting wouldn't be quite as tiresome as the one they had in the afternoon but apparently they were not all on the same page for this matter eirher. Why was he even surprised?
But Shikamaru didn't want to waste another second here without knowing how Neji was.
He had taken Neji back to the city after the Hyuuga had collapsed in his arms. Ino and Sakura had followed after him after he informed them that there were no other people in the house. He wasn't an idiot; from the state of the fire, it was clear that those who hadn't made it out were dead. Neji had barely made it out. But of course Ino and Sakura had thought he meant that the Kieuses had escaped, and he didn't bother correcting them. Not at that moment anyway. Taking care of Neji was priority and the two kunoichi were currently treating him. Shikamaru had returned to the wreckage later and found the three corpses before informing the council.
He glanced around the meeting room with half lidded eyes.
I need to know how Neji is doing dammit.
Shikamaru cleared his throat loudly, ceasing the squabble in the conference room. All eyes turned to him.
"I would advice you to keep this matter low-key," Shikamaru stated clearly, his tone making it very clear that his advice wasn't open for discussion. "Do not alarm the villagers."
"Well, but then what do we do about the burial? They deserve to have proper burial spots at least," an elder with an oversized nose huffed. Shikamaru swore that this man's only purpose in the council was to lengthen the meetings' time so it would seem that he was doing something productive.
"And they will," Shikamaru drawled, "but the villagers don't need to know."
"Are you saying we give them unmarked graves?" a twitchy old lady screeched.
Shikamaru turned his annoyed eyes onto her, making her startle a little before she regained her composure and coughed twice, attempting to mask her shock. He resisted the urge to roll his eyes.
"I'm only going to say this once. Hold a private funeral, bury them and give them proper graves but don't alarm the villagers. And it'd be best not to put their family names on the stones."
If Asuma could see him now, the Jounin would be a very proud sensei indeed. Who knew Shikamaru could actually make a whole council agree with him so quickly? But then again, Asuma never seemed surprised whenever Shikamaru managed to pull things off successfully. The Jounin called it faith; Shikamaru called it overestimating, blind faith.
Heiwa-sama was the one who seemed to understand his concern. He quickly acceded to Shikamaru's suggestion and the rest of the elders eventually followed suit, some begrudgingly but Shikamaru could care less. He bade them a curt goodbye before racing out of the room.
Ino and Sakura were sitting in the living room of the house allocated to them, speaking to each other in low tones, when Shikamaru arrived.
"How is he?" he asked instantly, not bothering to keep the anxiety out of his voice.
"Don't worry, Shikamaru," Ino said gently, touching his arm. "He's still unconscious but he's fine."
Relief immediately flooded through him and Shikamaru let out a long breath.
"Just some burns but we've healed them and of course he expended himself again." Sakura's eyes were hard as she relayed this to Shikamaru. No doubt she already knew that the fire was an attack and not an accident. Looking at Ino's steely eyes, Shikamaru guessed that the Yamanaka had come to that conclusion as well. "What happened, Shikamaru?"
Ino's grip on his arm tightened and then fell away when he said nothing. She covered her hand with her mouth as she stared at him, seeing the horrible truth etched in his features.
"No," she whispered brokenly, her voice hitching. "Oh gods, no."
Shikamaru's arms were around her, drawing her into a protective embrace before the dam broke. He stroked her head soothingly as she sobbed into his neck.
"He's only a kid." Ino's voice was hoarse and Shikamaru could see that Sakura was having a hard time fighting back her own tears. He wasn't faring very well himself. He hated seeing Ino cry. "He deserves to live. Oh, Shikamaru, this is so cruel!"
Shikamaru said nothing. He just held onto her tightly until her sobbing ceased to sniffles. Sakura had started busying herself with making some medicine, probably so that she could distract herself from the sadness.
Ino detached herself from Shikamaru, giving him a small smile despite her watery eyes.
"Hush now," he told her with a small smile of his own.
"What are they going to do with the bodies?" Sakura asked, her back facing them and her voice steadier than Shikamaru thought it would be.
"They're going to have a private funeral for them," Shikamaru said.
Ino nodded in approval. She opened her mouth to say something but closed it in hesitation. Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, prompting her to go on.
"I was just wondering if I could be in charge of it," Ino muttered softly.
"Sure you can," Shikamaru said before eyeing her pointedly. "But you go tell them yourself. I will not engage with those pigheads again."
"Well, Ino-buta will certainly have no problems dealing with them," Sakura said with a slight snigger as she turned around, a gleeful expression on her face.
Ino immediately glared, her sadness morphing into irritation. "Watch what you're saying, Billboard Brow!" Ino snapped, hands on hips.
"What, did I say anything wrong?" Sakura asked, mock-nicely as she smiled sweetly at Ino.
"You should go catch up with Heiwa-sama before he sleeps," Shikamaru cut in before the argument could escalate.
"You're right!" Ino brightened up immediately, even if her disposition was still dim. "I'll go get him now."
She rushed out of the building, blond hair swaying behind her. Shikamaru knew that it was Ino's way of coping; she needed to do something so that she wouldn't be hung up over the tragedy. Sakura watched her go with a fond smile on her face and Shikamaru couldn't help but think that the decision he made to tell Ino to save Sakura back at their first Chuunin exams was one of the best decisions he had ever made in his life.
Shikamaru looked at Sakura questioningly as the medic-nin placed a bottle in his hand.
"Pills for Neji," she explained. "Make sure he eats them when he wakes up."
Shikamaru nodded, pocketing the bottle. Sakura smiled at him before making to go after Ino.
"Hey, Sakura?"
She paused, looking over her shoulder at him.
"Take care of Ino."
She smiled. "Of course I will. You take care of Neji."
"Of course."
With that, Sakura ran out into the night as she attempted to catch up with Ino.
The smile slid from Shikamaru's face as he turned away from the main door to the bedroom door. He really wanted to see how Neji was doing but at the same time he was so damned afraid of what he would find behind those doors. Again, he was transported back to Kigakure where Neji laid in a bed, face as white as death under the pale moonlight. He let out a shaky breath and approached the door.
I'm behaving irrationally. Neji is fine.
And he looked fine too.
Neji was sitting up in the bed, leaning against the wall as he stared out the window. Shikamaru shut the door quietly behind and made his way over to the Hyuuga, sitting on the edge of the bed. Neji didn't give any signs that he knew the Nara was there.
The room was encased in silence. The storm had passed and the only sound that penetrated into the room was the steady drip of water from the roof onto the ground.
"Neji," Shikamaru called softly.
The Hyuuga didn't respond and Shikamaru didn't press him. Instead, he waited patiently, and eventually Neji slowly turned to face him. But he wasn't looking at Shikamaru. His eyes were clouded over and distant, staring beyond Shikamaru into a space only he was privy too. Shikamaru didn't have a clue where he was, and that realisation caused a foreign churning in his heart, making it hard for him to breath.
"Neji," Shikamaru called again, more firmly this time, the panic in his heart leaking into his voice.
Neji still didn't do anything and Shikamaru had a half mind to shake him into responding but held himself back and did what he did best. He waited. It took a while but eventually Neji's eyes focused on him.
"Shikamaru," Neji murmured, looking at Shikamaru as if seeing him for the first time.
"Yeah, I'm here," Shikamaru said, resisting the urge to grab Neji's hand so that he could show him as well.
Neji blinked once and turned his head away and when he spoke again, his tone was calm and detached. The tone all shinobi (except Naruto) took on when they were reporting back after a mission. "It was Rai."
"Revenge?" Shikamaru asked, latching on to the opportunity to talk about something, even if it was about the fire. As long as Neji was here and saying something. Besides, he needed to know what happened anyway.
"For Ami," Neji replied simply and Shikamaru found himself wondering how the hell Neji was still able to assess the situation so calmly even when he was so obviously distraught over it.
Is this what it means to be a Jounin? Damn, Asuma, you make it look so easy.
Doesn't mean it is, Shikamaru.
Shikamaru pushed Asuma's voice away and focused on Neji.
"How?" Shikamaru asked, somehow knowing that Neji would understand what he was asking.
"He could halt his heart for a few minutes and still stay alive. That's how he fooled us," Neji explained slowly as if recalling something from the distant past. "He followed us back."
"He knew about the Kieuses?" Shikamaru asked, not feeling very comfortable with how easy he was slipping back into business mode.
Neji shook his head slowly. "He just wanted revenge on me."
"And they were in the way?"
Neji nodded once.
"So he killed them?"
Neji nodded again.
That confirmed Shikamaru's theory then.
Shikamaru paused, looking at Neji carefully and noted that his mask was still firmly intact, before asking. "And you killed him?"
Neji's pause was even longer but he eventually nodded.
Shikamaru nodded; there was nothing more to say. He looked over at Neji and wondered what the Hyuuga was thinking. He thought that maybe he should leave, let Neji get some rest, but he found that he couldn't move.
The two of them stayed there, in the same positions, for a long while in silence. Neji was as still as a statue, just staring out at the window, looking at something not visible to Shikamaru. The Nara sat facing him, watching him but not seeing him. Again, he found himself faced with a polished matte – stone cold eyes and hard sculptured features. Not a flicker of life in those eyes, not a crack of emotions across that face. By watching him, Shikamaru could almost believe that Neji felt nothing, except that he'd never believe something like that.
I should go.
That was probably the fifth time he thought that in the past hour but still he didn't budge. His body just didn't want to do what his brain was telling it to. His body just wanted to sit there and watch Neji despite the cramping in his legs.
I want to see you.
And Shikamaru almost startled at that thought. What was that about?
Maybe his brain was cramping too.
Maybe it's your heart saying something. And maybe you should listen to it.
Shikamaru frowned at Asuma's voice in his head. He hadn't understood what Asuma had meant by that. Now, a few months later, and he was still none the wiser. What the hell did his heart have to do with anything? As a shinobi, as a tactician, it was his brain that he had to rely on. The Sasuke Retrieval Mission was the perfect example of that. It hadn't ended well, but it could have ended up worse.
Had his heart had something to say at that time, what would it be? Don't leave your comrades behind? Don't leave your best friend behind? Yet, that was obviously the wrong choice. At his deepest core, he knew that he hadn't wanted to leave anyone behind, especially not Chouji. But it had to be done and he had instinctively knew that. So if he already knew the right thing to do, what did it matter what his heart apparently felt on the matter? He doubted he'd feel any less guilty had he volunteered to take on Jiroubou alongside his best friend; in fact, he probably wouldn't have felt anything since he'd be dead. He and the rest of the team.
Shikamaru looked at Neji's blank face and suddenly he felt an irrational urge to do something because he just couldn't bear looking at Neji being this statue.
They spoke at the same time.
"Neji."
"I let them die."
Shikamaru swallowed thickly, unsure of how to respond to that. The Sasuke Retrieval Mission – his first Chuunin mission – was still haunting him up till this day after all and no one had died. He could only imagine how Neji must be feeling with two dead people under his watch, one a child at that.
"You were injured," Shikamaru pointed out eventually, falling back onto logic. Logic was safe, logic was good, logic made sense. "There was no way you could have fought against Rai and still saved them. You already did your best."
"I should have protected them."
He isn't registering a word I say…
Shikamaru sighed again, running his hand through his hair.
"Look, Neji," he said, voice coming out harsher than he intended. If Neji was shocked, it didn't show as he turned to look at Shikamaru. "Ino's gonna call me a bastard for this but I don't freaking care. All I care about it that you made it out alive, okay."
There was a shift in Neji's eyes, almost like ice thawing, but he blinked and the ice hardened.
"I should have protected them," Neji whispered again, a broken sound even the ice couldn't contain.
And then Shikamaru saw it. A tear falling down Neji's cheek, its path traced by the moonlight shining in through the window.
Before he could even think about what he was doing, Shikamaru moved next to Neji and placed an arm around the Hyuuga's shoulder, drawing him closer to him and feeling him turn into his embrace. Shikamaru felt his shirt getting damp as the tear soaked the fabric and he felt his heart clench painfully for some reason.
This wasn't the same with Ino. With his teammate, he had been comforting her, offering her a safe place where she could let out all her pain and sorrow. With Neji, that wasn't the case at all. Shikamaru was very well aware of the fact that he wasn't qualified to be Neji's safe place. Right now, all he was was another layer of defence that the Hyuuga needed. He was just a temporary shield for Neji to hide away, just for a little while till he could gather his thoughts and piece them together properly.
So what he did next certainly didn't make sense.
Holding Neji by his shoulders, Shikamaru pulled away from him slowly. He saw the unshed tears in Neji's eyes, the stubborn fight to not let them fall and did the most senseless thing in his life.
Leaning down slightly, Shikamaru pressed his lips against the corner of Neji's eyes, kissing the unshed tears away so that they didn't fall, before doing the same to the other eye.
"It's okay, Neji," Shikamaru whispered softly as he pulled back, letting Neji rest his head against his chest. "It's okay," he pressed the words against Neji's forehead protector, feeling a soft exhale leaving the Jounin's body.
No more tears fell that night.
Shikamaru wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
"Yeah but it's too hard to get so let's forget about it."
"It'll help a lot though."
"We have soldier pills."
"We ran out."
"We'll make more."
"But those are a lot more helpful."
"It's too dangerous, Ino."
"I know."
Ino sighed in frustration, blowing at her fringe so that it flew up a little and flopped back against her face.
"What's dangerous?" Shikamaru asked as he sauntered in, yawning and stretching. He hadn't slept but he didn't want questions.
"Morning, lazybones," Ino greeted, watching him in amusement as he trudged over to the table and collapsed into his chair, smacking his face onto the table. He felt something hot touch his hand and he jerked back in reflex, yelping as he wrung his hand in an attempt to cool it down.
"INO."
"Coffee," Ino said smugly, indicating to the steaming ceramic cup in front of him.
He rolled his eyes and reached for the cup, all the while grumbling about troublesome women under his breath.
"You're welcome." Ino was the sun right now. Shikamaru's mood was like the shadows casted by the sun. The brighter the sun glowed, the darker the shadows.
"I can't decide if I'm grateful or homicidal," Shikamaru retorted, only realising his mistake when he saw Ino's face fall but she recovered quickly enough, forcing a smile onto her face. Her resulting silence was telling enough though. "So, what's too dangerous?" Shikamaru asked conversationally, turning the topic to safer grounds, as he looked at Sakura.
She seemed to understand what he was trying to do. "Getting Lucem Vitae."
Lucem Vitae. Light of Life. A plant so called because of its immense healing abilities and rejuvenating power. Definitely better than a soldier pill.
"For Neji?" Shikamaru asked, sounding casual as he took a sip from his coffee, his mind already several steps ahead.
Sakura nodded. "His chakra levels are too low for him to recover properly at the moment. Tsunade-sama would be able to think of something but right now all we have are medication and it isn't exactly good to give him too much of those since his body and immune system are all rather weak at the moment."
"Which also makes him susceptible to all sorts of viruses. So, say, if he catches a cold, it could be potentially fatal," Ino continued.
"The best thing we can do now is let him rest," Sakura said with a frown. "Though I don't know how long that will take, especially since we have to remake more soldier pills."
"But even if we don't know how long he needs, we can be pretty damn sure it'll be a long time," Ino said with a huff. "We can't stay here that long either."
"We'll probably have to call in a Jounin medic-nin or something," Sakura said but even Shikamaru could tell that she didn't like the idea of that.
"But Lucem Vitae can be found in Kawagakure which is like an hour from here," Ino interjected, folding her arms across her chest. "I volunteered to go but Sakura said it was too dangerous."
"Don't you have a funeral to plan?" Shikamaru asked, raising an eyebrow.
Ino pouted and kicked him lightly under the table. But he had expected that and had already lifted his legs up to sit cross-legged. Ino scowled.
"Yes, but –"
"And Sakura is right – it's too dangerous," Shikamaru said matter-of-factly. "Kawagakure hosts too many nuke-nins. Plus they hate us."
Yeah, so what do you think you're planning, genius?
Shikamaru told himself to shut up.
"And Ino, it'd be better if you plan the funeral properly, don't you think?"
He didn't really want to play the guilt card but it worked like a charm. Ino hung her head slightly in shame before she looked up, newfound determination sparkling in her eyes. "You're right, Shikamaru."
"While you're at it, could you also settle any questions the council might have? Since you'll be in contact with them anyway while planning the funeral."
"Alright."
Once Ino was in the mood, she was always agreeable.
"Well, I'll be going round the village and checking on the patients," Sakura said. She glanced over to Neji's door. "I'll monitor Neji's condition too since Ino will probably be too busy to come back."
Shikamaru hummed in approval. "I'll take a look around the village and come up with the final plans for the reconstruction."
A blatant lie, since he'd already had those plans out from the meeting the previous day. While the elders fought like vultures over a carcass, he had been working on the blue prints.
"Right," Ino said, placing her hands on her table and pushing herself up, her chair scrapping backwards against the floor. "Time to get to work then!"
Sakura nodded as she rose as well. The two girls headed to the door, but paused when they realised Shikamaru wasn't following.
"Er, Shikamaru?" Ino asked uncertainly, gesturing towards the door.
Shikamaru looked at her before looking at his half-finished coffee pointedly.
Ino rolled her eyes, turning away and pushing the door open. "Whatever, slacker, see ya later!" she said in a sing-song voice as she pushed open the door and left the house.
"See you later then, Shikamaru!" Sakura said with a small smile before she was on her way as well.
Shikamaru waited till their footsteps receded and there was only silence in the house before he finished his coffee. Standing up slowly, Shikamaru surveyed the room once before making the hand seals for a shadow clone. He used as little chakra as possible. As long as no one attacked the clone or hit it too violently, it should be fine. In other words, the clone should avoid Ino at all cost.
Shikamaru looked at his clone, his own bored expression mirrored back to him.
"Well, just stroll around the village I guess," he murmured, more to himself than to the clone, wondering if that actually made a difference.
The clone took off immediately and Shikamaru watched it go before turning to Neji's bedroom. He walked over and opened it softly. Light streamed in through the tiny gap, spilling into the otherwise dark room and illuminating the Hyuuga's pale face. Neji was sleeping and as usual, there was a frown on his face.
Shikamaru immediately thought of The Liar but convinced himself that it was because Neji wasn't feeling well. He didn't want to dwell on things that had nothing to do with him.
"Rest well, Hyuuga," Shikamaru muttered under his breath before he closed the door behind him.
Shikamaru hadn't been lying when he said that Kawagakure was dangerous because it hosted many nuke-nins and were enemies with Konoha. Both were facts that everyone knew after all. But sometimes, these disadvantages could be turned around and be beneficial.
Nuke-nins usually worked by themselves and any group they formed were unlikely to stay united, as evident from Yuji and his gang. And they didn't pick trouble unnecessarily. Also, the fact that Kawagakure was a safe haven for nuke-nins meant that it was easy to get past the border, which Shikamaru did ten minutes ago.
The Nara glanced at his scarred, burly self in the reflection of the water. Definitely not his best-looking transformation by far but it would do the trick. Life fact: the bigger, the uglier, the scarier. Stereotypical and unfair but true. And Shikamaru was going to exploit it. He had also created another slimmer shadow clone that was closer to his actual size. While having two big scary guys seemed like a better idea, he didn't want to invite trouble. Who knew if some nuke-nins had some competitive streak going on or something? It was better to keep things balanced. Besides, creating a smaller shadow clone meant using less chakra.
He had left his Leaf headband back at the village, on Neji's bed. He hadn't known why he did that and he still didn't know but he didn't dwell on it. He had to focus on something else.
The best-case scenario would be to not engage with anyone but Shikamaru had already prepared a few backup plans just in case. The worst-case scenario was a group of nuke-nins asking him to join their gang. Unlikely but possible. So Shikamaru also had a plan for that just in case.
Lucem vitae were usually found in fjords, hanging off the sides of the cliffs. Shikamaru had always thought it was troublesome that his father made him memorise the breeding places of herbs but he guessed that the information was coming in handy now. He had already committed several routes to mind on his way to Kawagakure and was now taking the shortest one. If all went well, he'd be back in the village before Ino and Sakura even realised he was gone.
Like that was gonna happen.
Shikamaru tch'ed softly under his breath as he sped up. He hadn't encountered anyone yet and he didn't sense anyone nearby but that didn't mean that he was always going to stay this lucky. The fact that no light could get through the thick canopy didn't help either – his shadows weren't going to be much help under this lighting, or lack thereof. The more he trudged into the swamps, the denser the water and light became, making navigation harder. The only comfort was that he could tell that the waters were anoxic so at least he didn't have to worry about aquatic creatures attacking him.
The Byakugan would be really helpful now, Shikamaru thought wryly as he trekked on.
His mental compass told him that he had still had at least 50 more miles to go. He would increase his speed again but feared that it would be too suspicious. He was too deep in the country to use the excuse of running away from pursuers. Movement from his periphery caught his attention and Shikamaru slowed to walk, eyes darting around to sift out any threat.
He wasn't going about to go look for a confrontation so if they weren't going to show, he would just be on his way.
A shuriken flew at him and he sidestepped it. He held his breath, preparing for fight (even if what he wanted was flight) since these people were obviously truculent and wasn't about to let him go that easily.
He congratulated himself on managing to maintain a calm mien when a kid rushed out instead.
"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it!"
Shikamaru couldn't decide if the kid was really dumb or plotting something more sinister.
"It's okay," he replied, voice pitched lower and gruffer than usual though he made sure to sound irritated.
His shadow clone kept up appearances by glowering at the young child who sniffed and took a step back.
"Get gone," Shikamaru snapped and was about to be on his way when the kid called out to him. He frowned, cursing himself for being soft, and turned around. "What?"
"I… I'm scared."
Then you really shouldn't go around talking to strangers.
"I don't really care."
"It's just that my brother said he'd be back soon."
Oh gods above. I'm sure I look like I want to eat him.
"Kid, seriously, get lost," Shikamaru growled, not even needing to pretend to be frustrated with the situation. He didn't even like dealing with children on a normal basis.
The kid appeared to have finally gotten the message as his green eyes widened in fear before he scurried back. He somehow seemed to have not realised how scary Shikamaru and his clone looked like earlier.
"I- I- I'm so- sorry," he stuttered. "It's just Yuji-niisan said he'd be back real quick and it's been days and I thought… I don't know. He left me here alone. He said he'd be back."
Dread struck Shikamaru like cold lightning and he felt his annoyance evaporate in an instant. He belatedly registered that he was openly gaping at the kid and quickly shut his mouth. Luckily, the kid's eyes were focused on the ground. A glint of silver caught Shikamaru's eyes and he glanced at the forehead protect that hung loosely from the side of the child's shirt.
Kirigakure.
A slash was cut across the village symbol. Shikamaru wondered exactly what would have driven such a young kid away from home.
Oh gods I killed his brother.
Technically, Neji did. Not that that eased the guilt that Shikamaru was feeling. He looked down at the kid and realised for the first time how tiny he was. His fingers wouldn't even be able to wrap around his forearm.
This kid was probably going to die. Just like how Kibou died.
The thought hit Shikamaru so suddenly that he was almost physically pushed back by the shock of it.
"Please take me with you. I'll do anything!" the kid cried, tears in his eyes. He was obviously petrified. Living on his own the past few days must have been hell for him.
Gods, he was too young to be here. But Shikamaru couldn't do anything.
Forcing himself to remain calm, Shikamaru managed a scoff. "You can't offer anything I need."
The tears fell, stabbing Shikamaru in the heart. "Please, I'll learn. I'll do anything. I'll-"
"Shut up," his shadow clone snarled, shooting the kid a dark glare and turning away. "We're leaving."
His shadow clone proceeded to do just that.
Leave. Leave. Leave.
Shikamaru repeated that order to himself mentally over and over again. It was easy to direct his shadow clone away from the scene; it wasn't so easy to detach himself. The kid was crying openly, tears pouring down his cheeks.
Gods, he knows he won't survive.
A part of Shikamaru entertained the thought of just killing the kid right there and then so the kid wouldn't have to suffer through fearing for his life and waiting fanatically for someone who was never going to come back. Because Shikamaru had made sure that that someone was never going to be able to come back. It'd really be more merciful to take the kid's life now. Other ninjas might not be as merciful as him.
But, no. There was no way Shikamaru could do it. There was a difference between killing an enemy who had no qualms about doing the same to you and killing an innocent child whose only want was to survive in this world. Shikamaru couldn't take such a precious life away. No matter how merciful it might seem. And who was to say for sure that the kid wouldn't have made it? Shikamaru wasn't going to take that chance away from him.
Before he even realised what he was doing, Shikamaru had already unhooked his pouch from his pocket. He threw at the kid who caught it with surprisingly quick reflexes. That gave him a bit of hope, knowing that the kid wasn't all that helpless at least.
"Take that," he grounded out.
The shuriken thrown at him earlier had been out of reflex and probably out of fear but Shikamaru could tell that the kid's aim was good. Yuji must have taught him a few tricks before he left. The pouch didn't have much but at least it was something.
"Thank you," the boy gushed, smiling gratefully through the tears that wouldn't stop flowing.
Shikamaru averted his gaze on the pretext of being bored with the entire situation. The truth was he couldn't bear to look at the boy a second longer.
"Get lost."
The boy obeyed this time and Shikamaru watched him disappear into the murky woods before forcing himself to move. He had lost quite a bit of time already.
As if that was the only thing he lost.
Rain was pelting down against his back with a vengeance. His hair was plastered to his face. The rocks were slippery under his grip and a single wrong step would result in him plummeting into the thrashing waves below. Not really the way he wanted to go. He had gotten rid of his shadow clone for the time being, choosing to use his chakra on ensuring that he remained balanced.
The Lucem Vitae were almost dangling right in front of his face yet there were no ledges where his feet could find purchase, so he was forced to watch it wave at him tauntingly. He glowered at it, wishing that Chouji was there with him so that he could just use his expansion jutsu to snag that stupid plant.
Luckily, Shikamaru had decided to leave two spare kunai on his body and did not give everything to the kid. Asuma called it foresight but Shikamaru thought that it was really just plain luck. Guess not all women hated him.
Taking in a deep breath, Shikamaru dropped his right hand away from the rocks and reached into his pocket. The simple action was infinitely harder when done while hanging off the edge of a cliff but the Nara managed it somehow. Panting harshly, he shifted his body as little that he could aim properly. The surface of the cliff below had little cracks running along it but none big enough for his foot. He had to ensure that the kunai was securely embedded in one of those cracks. Breathing in deeply again, Shikamaru let the kunai fly from his hand and exhaled in relief when the kunai sank into the desired crack snugly.
Reaching up, he grabbed another rock with his left hand, ignoring the cuts it made into his already bleeding skin, so that he could shift more to the left and step onto the makeshift ledge. He tested it a few times by tapping his foot against it. It seemed to hold. Shikamaru bit his lower lip and closed his eyes, trying not to imagine himself falling. He opened his eyes and eyed the kunai wearily once more before deciding to get it done and over with. Rather than fantasise about the various disastrous scenarios, Shikamaru took a bold step forward, placing his weight onto the kunai and kicked off it, using the momentum to swing himself upwards to grab onto another rock.
And then he lost his grip.
Shikamaru scrambled against the wall as he attempted to grab onto something. Anything. The roar of the ocean was getting louder. In his panic, he was just blindly thrashing and snatching at the cliff. By some stroke of luck, his managed to grab onto a piece of vine and managed to halt his fall.
He was so near the water that his pants were all drenched. The waves crashed violently against the rocks and screamed its fury. Shikamaru swallowed thickly as he realised just how closely he had come to his death. Letting out a shuddering breath, Shikamaru began hoisting himself up the vine. Each time he gripped the vine to pull himself up, the thorns on it pierced into his skin, making new cuts and mutilating old ones. Shikamaru gritted his teeth through the pain and pressed on – the Lucem Vitae were located just beside this vine.
It felt like forever but Shikamaru eventually reached the plant. Holding onto the vine which was very well his life line at the moment, Shikamaru reached out with his right hand and grasped the plant, feeling relief flood his veins when he felt the velvety texture of it. With a sharp pull, he uprooted the plant. Usually one would be enough but Shikamaru plucked out a few more just to be safe. Besides, he was sure his mother would appreciate some.
Stuffing them unceremoniously into his empty pouch, Shikamaru began the gruelling ascent back up the cliff. By the time he climbed over the edge, he had somehow lost his hair tie and his pants were clinging stickily to his legs. Also, his hands had too many cuts to count. They were beginning to swell a little as well. There was probably some poison in that vine. He wasn't too surprised. Fortunately, he was well prepared. He had expected poison so he had snuck out some of Sakura's antidotes before he left the village. Injecting it into his hand, Shikamaru hissed at the burning sensation as the serum entered his bloodstream.
What Shikamaru really wanted to do was lie down and just rest for a minute. At that precise moment, he felt his shadow clone back at the village disappear. Mission failed: Ino had gotten her hands on it. But with that came the vision of what happened to it.
But it wasn't the fatal smack on the back that Shikamaru was concerned with. It was the confusion and worry on Ino's face just seconds before the shadow clone disappeared that had Shikamaru up and running despite his protesting muscles and aching head.
Ino was going to kill him.
Somehow, just somehow, Shikamaru managed to make it safely out of Kawagakure without too much of a scuffle. He had encountered a group of three locals who were rather suspicious of him but they let him go after listening to the tale he spun them. It was lucky he had remembered to do the transformation technique.
At the midway point back to the village, Shikamaru deemed it safe to drop the transformation. He didn't have much chakra left and he needed whatever energy he still had in order to make it back to the village. He would have taken a soldier pill but he had left his supply of it back with Neji, just in case the Hyuuga needed it. While Sakura and Ino were making new ones, Shikamaru just wasn't comfortable with the thought that there weren't any spares with the Jounin.
By the time the village come into view, Shikamaru's eyes were barely opened. He could briefly make out two figures standing by the gates. Ah, they were moving. He hobbled for a few more steps, determined to at least make it to the gates. But the figures were faster. They met him halfway.
"Shikamaru!" Ino shouted, a mixture of relief and fear. She was saying something more but Shikamaru couldn't hear anything.
He reached for his pouch and shoved it into Ino's hands. The blonde took it with wide eyes.
"For Neji," he managed to rasp out.
And then the world turned black.
Shikamaru's eyes snapped open and he sat up, eyes darting around wildly until he realised that he was just in a bedroom back at the village. Sakura rushed in, sighing in relief when she saw him sitting there. He wondered how she knew he was awake before his eyes landed on the broken vase on the floor. He must have wrecked it in his panic.
"Sakura," he said, voice crocking. He felt completely fine but his voice was just dry.
"Here," she said, passing him a glass of water which he gulped down gratefully.
"What happened?" he asked after emptying the glass, holding it in his hands.
Sakura was looking at him with a mixture of vexation and sadness. He was glad it wasn't Ino. He wasn't sure if he could take that look from her.
"You mean besides Ino crying her eyes out the entire night?" Sakura asked cuttingly. A slap would have hurt less.
"Sakura –"
"That was very selfish of you! What were you thinking?! Doing such a thing, especially after talking her out of doing it herself!" Sakura was practically screaming by now but she kept her voice soft. Shikamaru figured that Neji must still be sleeping.
"I'm sorry." Shikamaru hung his head, feeling like the world's greatest asshole. First, the kid. Now Ino. Then there were the Kieuses. He was letting everybody down. But he didn't regret it.
He eventually looked up and saw that Sakura's lips were still pursed in anger that her hands were curled into fists by her sides. But he also saw the worry in her eyes and that hurt more than anything.
"How's Neji?" he asked instead because despite everything, that was the one thing that he really needed to know.
Sakura's eyes softened and something Shikamaru couldn't decipher flash across her eyes before she huffed and started clearing up the broken pieces of ceramic on the floor.
"He's doing well and recovering steadily," Sakura said, not looking at Shikamaru as she swept up the fragments. Shikamaru felt the last of the tension leave his body at those words. Sakura finally looked up at him and there was a sort of admiration in her eyes. "Thanks to the Lucem Vitae you brought back. It's good that you brought back the amount you did. We used some for you too."
That would explain why he was feeling so much better. He looked at his hands noticed that they were back to their normal sizes. There were still wounds but those would heal eventually.
"Shikamaru," Sakura called softly and he looked up to find her standing at the door. "I know you did it for Neji and I know that you're a really good friend but – " her voice hitched " – don't ever scare us like that again."
"I won't," Shikamaru promised, looking at the Haruno straight in the eyes to let her know that he meant it.
She smiled at him and nodded. She lifted the bundle she had wrapped the ceramic pieces in. "I'll go throw these away."
"Sakura," Shikamaru called, already halfway out of the bed. "Where's Ino?"
Sakura smiled again and she gestured out towards the town. "She's doing some last minute preparations for the funeral."
Shikamaru nodded his thanks and was out of the house in a flash.
Shikamaru found Ino near the area where the safe house has been. The area had been cleared up and looked like just an empty plot of land that Shikamaru assumed was going to be the burial spot.
Two caskets sat side by side – the bigger one on the left was to be buried first. Flowers covered all sides of the coffins, placed delicately in the ledges so that they wouldn't fall off. The full names of the two were inscribed at the top of the coffins and circling each name was a wreath of flowers – white heathers for Nozomi and blue irises for Kibou.
Ino looked up from where she was adjusting Nozomi's wreath and smiled at Shikamaru warmly. Shikamaru smiled back uncertainly. He was expecting violence, not this kind treatment.
"Protection and wishes will come true," she explained, gesturing to the flowers under her touch. Ino's face softened as she brushed her fingers across the petals, the motion making them sway slightly. "Because Nozomi will keep protecting Kibou even in death."
Shikamaru nodded as he came up to stand beside her. If Ino wasn't going to talk about his little traipse into Kawagakure, then he sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up. "Hope?" he chanced a guess, looking down at the blue flowers.
Ino nodded. She gave the two coffins a thorough check, reaching out to straighten a stray petal before smiling in satisfaction and standing up.
"I know you said not to include their surnames on the tombstones, but I figured it'd be okay if they were on the coffins," Ino said when she noticed Shikamaru staring at the engravings. "That's okay, right?"
"Yeah, of course it is," Shikamaru said, tearing his eyes away Kibou's coffin. He hadn't been looking at the names. He had been looking at how small the boy's casket was and imagining the kid in a similar one. Would the kid even have a coffin if he died? Shikamaru shook his head slightly so that Ino didn't see. "I just didn't think of that."
He wasn't thoughtful like Ino was. Had he been the one in charge of planning the funeral, the whole appearance of it would have been much duller. Sure, he'd put some flowers but the decoration would be nowhere near Ino's exquisite display and thoughtfulness. He was certain that all those flowers surrounding the coffins had meanings as well. Ino arranged her flower displays according to colour. That's what everyone knew. But Ino also made the effort to make sure that her displays had meanings. And that's what Team 10 knew. Chouji always asked for the meanings; Shikamaru always found it too troublesome to.
"I hope they like it," Ino said softly as she smiled down sadly at the two coffins.
"I'm sure they do."
The two Konoha shinobi spun around at the new voice and Shikamaru felt relief and something more tender rushing through his being as he saw Neji standing there, all immaculate white robes and graceful demeanour.
Ino beamed brightly as she walked over to Neji. "You're looking much better. That's great!"
"Thanks to you and Sakura," Neji replied as the two started walking over to Shikamaru.
Ino flushed at the rare compliment and shook her head lightly. "Please, your body is strong. Oh, oh gosh, what am I saying! I mean your immune system is strong."
Shikamaru snorted at the blonde's flailing and just smirked lightly when she glared at him. But then her look softened and Shikamaru's smirk slipped.
"The one you should really thank is Shikamaru though," Ino said quietly, her voice barely carrying over the singing of the birds.
Neji raised an eyebrow.
"He went to get the Lucem Vitae for you," Ino explained, her tone neither upset nor angry and Shikamaru didn't know what to make of it.
"Kawagakure?" Neji asked, turning surprised eyes on Shikamaru. "That's too dangerous. What were you thinking, Nara?"
Shikamaru shrugged lightly. "I'm well and alive."
"Barely," Ino said in that same dull tone.
"Ino," Shikamaru started, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder.
She finally looked up at him and Shikamaru saw the unshed tears in her eyes. "I'm just really glad you're okay, Shikamaru."
Shikamaru felt his heart squeezing painfully, like someone had sprayed lemon across an open wound.
"I'll go inform Heiwa-sama and the other elders that the funeral will be held in an hour," she said and turned to leave. But before she actually did so, she pulled Shikamaru into a hug before smiling at him brightly and leaving.
After Ino left, the silence between the two remaining shinobi was thick and smouldering. Shikamaru didn't exactly expect gratitude from the Hyuuga but he didn't expect this animosity instead. He finally tore his eyes away from the coffins and turned to look at Neji. What he saw made him freeze.
Much like that night when he had held Neji in his arms, the Hyuuga once again had tears brimming in his eyes.
"Neji," Shikamaru called out softly, unsure of what to do.
Neji turned to him and he closed his eyes for a long moment. When he opened them again, the tears had frozen to ice. But Shikamaru could see it threatening to crack. But he could also see Neji not letting it.
Before he could say anything, Neji had crossed the space between them. He touched Shikamaru's hand gently, causing a slight shiver to pass through the Nara's body though he remained unaffected outwardly. Neji held Shikamaru's hands and brought them up so that he could inspect them. He traced the healing cuts tenderly before he let go.
He looked at Shikamaru, brows knitted together, a forlorn expression on his face.
"Don't be so nice to me, Shikamaru," Neji whispered, his broken voice the complete opposite from his normal mellifluous tones.
"Neji," Shikamaru started but was stopped by Neji raising a palm, creating a wall between them. A transparent wall; Shikamaru could see him but couldn't touch him.
"You'll ruin everything."
Neji didn't let him say anything else as he turned to leave. As Shikamaru watched Neji's back recede into the distance, he wondered if perhaps the wall wasn't opaque after all.
Because he sure as hell couldn't see Hyuuga Neji.
The room was swathed in a soft orange glow whose purpose seemed to be more for the sake of complimenting the eerie atmosphere of the room than for providing light. He supposed the purpose was to intimidate people. Too bad for them then, since he wasn't the least bit afraid.
The woman at the table hadn't spoken to him once ever since he entered the room. All she had done when he first came in was give him a brief cursory glance before looking over at the single chair in the middle of the room. Those were all the furniture in the room.
It had been close to two hours since he had been in there and he was about to say something when the door creaked open, scrapping loudly against the floor with a shrilling pitch. Neither occupant flinched. A masked man came in, bearing a stack of folders in his arms. He passed it to the woman, grunted once and left. The woman opened the folder, scanned through the documents inside before nodding. She left the items on the table and left without looking at the remaining person in the room.
He stood up on steady legs despite feeling like they were made out of jelly. His confident strides over to the table was an inversion to the torrent of emotions crashing and thrashing inside him. The only thing that betrayed him was the slight quiver in his arms as he picked up the folder.
He stood there, staring at it and not doing anything else. Time flowed like sand in an hourglass, and still he stayed and did nothing. He didn't know how much time passed before he finally gathered enough courage to open it.
When he did, his strong façade finally let up and he sank to the ground, clutching the file to his chest as unbridled tears flowed down his face.
Shikamaru was leaning against the gates of Konoha with his eyes closed. It had already been a week since he and the others had returned from Heiwa-sama's village. What Neji said bothered him. In fact, it bothered him a great deal more than he cared to admit. But he had decided that he wasn't going to dwell too much on that.
It was too troublesome.
And it wasn't his damned business.
Releasing a long sigh, Shikamaru tilted his head back and pretended to sleep. His lips curled into a smirk as he felt a familiar chakra presence.
"This isn't the way to greet a guest," a haughty voice commented.
Shikamaru opened his eyes and saw the mirth dancing in Temari's eyes.
"Troublesome woman."
Temari smirked, matching the twinkle in her eyes.
"Crybaby."
Looong chapter. xD I hope you guys enjoyed it! Reviews are much loved and it's always a great pleasure for me to hear what you think.
Till next time!
~Witherwolf