A/N: Warning, this is a slightly depressing chapter, read at your own risk.

James rolled over on his couch the room spinning as he tried to focus his eyes on the half full bottle of tequila that lay within arm's reach on the floor, he reached for it, his fingers brushed against the lip but he only succeeded in pushing it farther away. He growled in frustration as he continued his futile struggle to get the bottle again, each attempt bringing him further and further off of the couch until he fell off completely. 'This is comfier than the couch anyway,' he thought as he gripped the neck of the bottle then rolled onto his back. The tequila felt good as it poured down his parched throat, further numbing the pain he had been feeling ever since Miranda left, leaving him in an oblivion he was all too happy to stay in. He wanted to evade the inevitable confrontation he would have to face against the consequences of his actions for as long as he possibly could, and a constant state of drunkenness seemed the best way to do it.

The floor became uncomfortable after a few more minutes and his stomach rumbled, telling him that had been at least eight hours since he had had anything in his system that was not alcohol. Remaining on the floor soon seemed like the better option he soon discovered when his legs almost gave out from underneath him as he stood upright, he rested his hands against the coffee table in order to regain some semblance of balance. He pushed off the table, stumbling a bit as he walked to the kitchen, his eyes still not entirely focused when he reached the refrigerator. Even with his vision still not at its best, James could still tell there was hardly anything edible in the fridge save for a slice of cheese and a stalk of celery, neither one an ideal option given the state of his stomach.

'Could message Lola, tell her to bring over some more food,' he mused as he slumped to the floor, the refrigerator door still opened as he fell asleep again.

"Is he dead, Ellie?"

"No, just exhausted, and no wonder all he's had to eat these last couple of weeks is tequila and bourbon."

"If I drank that shit, I'd be dead."

"You've never been able to handle your liquor, Joker."

"Ah, shove it, Steve."

"Can both of you knock it off, please? He's waking up."

James's eyes flickered open weakly, everything he saw were just various colored blurs, the first thing coming into focus were Elissa's green eyes, followed by the rest of her face. Normally she would be a welcome sight but he had a feeling she had found him in a very poor state, suddenly he felt very ashamed of himself, the last thing he had wanted was for her to find him at his lowest. He started to feel the hard floor of the kitchen pressing against his limbs, his aching body telling him he needed to move sooner rather than later, he lifted his head as he tried to prop himself up on his elbows. Every part of him felt weak, as if the muscles he had spent so many years building and toning had suddenly disappeared from his body completely. He was about to give up entirely when he felt a familiar hand underneath his bicep and then an arm laying across his shoulders.

"Easy does it, big guy," whispered Elissa as she helped him into the sitting position. He could tell her eyes were on him trying to evaluate how bad his present state was, but he refused to look her in the eye too ashamed of himself to face her.

His head felt as if someone had smashed into it with a mallet but it was not as clouded as before, he rubbed his eyes a few times and lifted his head, surprised to see Steve and Joker kneeling at his feet. 'Great, an intervention.' He shook his head, trying to clear away the remaining cobwebs, hoping to postpone whatever plan they had for as long as possible.

He nearly jumped when he felt an ice cold cloth on the back of his neck. "Joker, go out to my car and get the groceries out of the back and bring them in. Steve, I need you to help me get him to the couch, he needs sleep and lots of it," he heard Elissa say, he wanted to respond, telling her he did not need her help but his voice would not cooperate.

"Roger that, Ellie," said Joker and James faintly heard the squeak of his sneakers as he left the kitchen. There was a tugging on both his arms urging him to move, a request he struggled to comply with, though once he was halfway on his feet Steve and Elissa pulled him up the rest of the way. He was aware they were moving him but all he could focus on was keeping his eyes open, giving into sleep right now would not be ideal since he would take out both Elissa and Steve in one go. His body made contact with the couch shortly after, much to his relief, then he felt a couple of pillows being propped underneath his head and a blanket was wrapped around his body before another cold compress was placed on his head. He laid there quietly and listened to his friends talk around him, taking comfort in the sound of their voices.

"Damn, Elissa, you're really good at this nurturing thing," said Steve as he watched Elissa tuck in the covers around James's massive form.

Elissa gave a breathy laugh, "I guess, I mean, I did take care of you guys after that party we had in my apartment. No one died from a hangover that day."

"Too true," chuckled Steve. "So what do we do now? Call a hospital?"

"No, there's no need for that type of intervention," replied Elissa sternly, "you and Joker should go home, I'll take it from here."

"Are you sure, Shepard? I could always stay here with you and help out," said Steve, "I mean, you aren't exactly in the best condition to be picking up incapacitated soldiers."

"I'll be perfectly fine, Steve, thanks for the vote of confidence," sighed Elissa.

Somewhere in the back of his mind James heard the front door open and the rustling of bags as Joker reentered the room.

"Here you go, Ellie, your bags of lead bricks," said Joker, his breathing heavy as he handed the bags off to Elissa.

Elissa laughed as she took the bags into the kitchen, Joker and Steve following closely behind her, both shooting concerned glances at James's still form. Shortly after arriving in the kitchen they heard snores coming from the living room, Elissa breathed a sigh of relief, she had been worried that he was in too much pain to actually fall into a decent sleep. His snores told her that he was getting some much needed rest.

Joker looked through the doorway at his friend, worry creasing his brow, "Damn, whatever happened in Washington must've been rough. Has he said anything to you about it, Elissa?"

She shook her head grimly, "Not a word, I thought he might've been more willing to open up about it after a few days of being home but he's been on such a bender lately I'm not sure he even knows what day it is anymore."

Steve leaned against the counter, his head hung low, "I should've known something like this was going to happen. Those couple of days he came into work after coming back from D.C should've tipped me off but I just didn't see it."

"What happened at the shop?" asked Joker as he accepted a glass of water from Elissa.

"He came in with red eyes, a bad attitude and he was moving slower than I'd ever seen him before," said Steve, shaking his head. "I gave him a few days off to recover but I didn't think he'd fall this hard."

Elissa rested her hand on his shoulder, "None of us did, Steve, but right now he needs us. We have to be there for him, regardless of what's caused him to fall off the deep end."

Joker nodded, "I agree with Ellie, the big guy needs us for sure." He walked over and draped his arm across Elissa's shoulders, hugging her tight against him, "I know you plan on staying here, Ellie, and no I'm not about to tell you otherwise. I'm just curious if you need anything else from the store cause I'm headed home and Steve here needs a ride back to the shop."

Elissa rested her head against his shoulder, "No, Jeff, I've got enough supplies to look after the big guy. You two head on home, really, I'll be fine."

"Okay, Ellie," said Joker, kissing the side of her head and she smiled. "Come on, Steve-O, I'll buy you dinner."

Steve chuckled as he walked out of the kitchen with Joker, "Whatever you say, Joker. You know, if you keep kissing her like that Joker, Kaidan's going to come after your ass."

Joker shrugged his shoulders, "No he's not, it's not like I kiss her full on the mouth." He tossed a look back at Elissa who was shaking her head, though he could see the smile on her face.

James woke up a few hours later, the room was no longer spinning but his mouth was dry and his head felt like it was about to crack in two from the throbbing headache deep within his skull. He looked around the room was darker than before the only light coming from a single lamp behind his head, which felt better on his eyes, and saw Elissa sitting in the armchair close to the couch a hardcover book in her hands. When she caught him staring at her she looked straight at him and smiled brightly before putting her book down on the coffee table.

"Hey, big guy, how's your head?" asked Elissa as she reached for a bowl that was sitting on the table.

James sat up as best he could, propping himself up on his elbow so he could see her better, "Could be better. How long've I been out?"

Elissa mixed up the contents of the bowl before answering, "Since I got here, maybe eight hours. Before that, I have no clue."

"Fuck," grumbled James as he ran his fingers through his greasy hair. "Hey, Lola, any chance I could get a shower?"

"Not yet, I want you to eat something before you start moving around," said Elissa sternly. "I'm not exactly sure how long it's been since you've eaten, but I do know it's been two weeks since I last bought you groceries, so you're probably in need some kind of nourishment."

He went to slam his fist against the table but he found it hard to lift his arm at all, instead he settled for putting his head back down on the pillows with a defiant grunt, immediately regretting it when the quick movement caused his head to hurt even more.

Elissa was quickly by his side, rubbing his head with her free hand while she held the bowl of beef broth in the other. The smell of the soup stirred James's long forgotten stomach, and he turned himself so he was closer to the intoxicating aroma, he would have preferred eggs and bacon but this was better than nothing.

"Is that soup for me or are you just going to tease me with it?" asked James as his gaze became fixated on the bowl in Elissa's hands.

She gave a throaty chuckle as she spooned some of the soup and pressed it against James's dry lips, he opened his mouth and swallowed the spoonful eagerly, the warm liquid coating his mouth and throat as it traveled down to his empty stomach. Even though it was nothing more than some thin broth, it tasted amazing and was doing its job by calming the rumbling of his stomach. When he was done with the broth Elissa handed him a cup of what appeared to be plain tea, though once he took a sip he could taste lemon and honey mixed in, the warm drink felt good as he drank deeply. The tea was finished soon after, making him feel even better, he looked up expectantly at Elissa hoping for something else to eat.

Elissa knew what he wanted, the hopeful gleam in his eye not escaping her notice, "I'll feed you something else after we see how you handle what I just gave you."

"Lola, I'm fine," protested James though he knew he was lying, and by the way she looked at him, he knew she knew he was lying as well.

Elissa leaned over and startled him with a soft kiss on his forehead, a sisterly gesture but a surprising one nonetheless, he closed his eyes enjoying the brief contact for its duration. Never had a touch been so welcome as this small kiss.

"Protest all you want, Jimmy, I'm not going anywhere," said Elissa softly as she pulled away.

James laid back against the pillows, feeling a hundred times better than before, and closed his eyes. "You know, Lola, I rather like the sound of that."

Elissa stayed by James's bedside for the next few days, feeding him broth and tea until he was able to stomach bananas and eggs, which took about four days to work him up to. Most of the time he slept but after a few days he was able to stay awake for long periods of time without suddenly passing out in the middle of a conversation. When he was showing more signs of improvement, Elissa allowed him to move around more, he took his much needed and appreciated shower.

"Hey, Jimmy, think you could handle some protein tonight?" shouted Elissa as she started to prepare for dinner.

"Yeah, I'm game for it!" he shouted from upstairs.

Shortly afterwards James came bounding down the stairs, a new shirt and pair of jeans on, his skin sporting a slightly red color from the very hot water he had used during his shower. He rounded the corner into the kitchen and sat down at the table, today had been the first day he had woken up feeling like his usual self, this did not go unnoticed by Elissa.

"Someone's feeling better," said Elissa as she started shredding cooked pieces of chicken before putting the massive pile into a bowl full of mayonnaise, horse raddish, sunflower seeds, chopped celery, and diced onions.

"You know it, Lola," said James cheerfully as he poured himself a glass of water from the pitcher on the table, relishing the cold feeling of the liquid.

Elissa smiled to herself as she mixed her dish, adding salt and pepper on occasion, when she was sure it tasted just right she sat it on the table in front of James before going back to get the toasted buns out of the oven. James took a forkful from the bowl and tasted it, surprised that such few ingredients could taste as well as this salad type dish she had prepared and he could not help but take a few more bites before she came over with the bread. When she saw what he was doing she smacked his hand away as if he were a small child with his hand in the cookie jar, the act eliciting a laugh from him which made her laugh in response.

"You naughty boy, can't you even wait?" asked Elissa as she sat down and started fixing him a sandwich, her eyes gleaming with mischief as she passed him a plate.

"Not with your cooking, Lola," replied James with a wink as he tucked into his sandwich, grateful that he could eat solid food again. He glanced over at Elissa whom was quietly eating her sandwich, he saw dark circles under her eyes and knew she was beyond exhausted, she had been taking care of him night and day for a solid week and probably needed some rest herself. The first couple of days of recovery were the worst for both of them he knew that much, he had been going through withdrawals and she had had to see him through it, and she had done so without protest. That was what she did best, taking care of everyone else before giving a thought to her own wellbeing, though he was grateful for this aspect of her personality he could not help but see it as her own downfall. He thought about this for a while as he ate his dinner, throwing a few glances at Elissa but mostly looking out of the window at the landscape around his house, his mind wandering to Miranda. The thought of Miranda made him lose his appetite, he threw down his sandwich in defeat and leaned back in his chair, glaring down at his plate as if it turned against him.

"What's wrong, Jimmy?" asked Elissa cautiously. She had seen him throw his sandwich down and was worried that he was going to be sick or something.

Instead of responding he stood up and slammed his chair into the table before storming off to the living room, too pissed off to speak. Everything was coming back around to Miranda and how she had lead him on as part of some crazy plan to keep a low profile, he wanted a drink badly. He walked over to his liquor cabinet and pulled out the bottle of whiskey he had yet to drink and unscrewed the lid, he brought the rim of the bottle to his lips and readied himself to drink. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Elissa standing beside him with her arms crossed and a dark look flashing across her face, he slowly brought the bottle away from his mouth and turned to face her. He could feel his cheeks warm with shame as he averted his eyes to the floor, realizing almost too late how stupid he was behaving.

"You better have a marvelous explanation for why you were about to undo a week's worth of recovery, Lieutenant," snapped Elissa. She did not reach for the bottle like she had wanted to, instead deciding it would be best to leave the decision up to him, and see if this was truly what he wanted to do.

James looked at the bottle in his hands and felt an overwhelming flood of anger wash over him, he wanted this to be over, to have a fresh start after all that had happened in Washington. He took one final look at the bottle before he flung it across the room, creating a loud crash as it made contact with the wall. He took great pleasure when the glass shards went flying and the whiskey ran down the wall.

"I'll tell you whatever you want to know, Lola," said James, his eyes still fixed on the spot where the bottle had shattered.

"Let me get this straight, Miranda used you in some scheme she cooked up to appear normal to the people she was working with?" asked Elissa after James told her about what happened in Washington. "Then she goes and admits it after you get there to take her back here?"

"Yeah, that pretty much sums it up," sighed James as he reclined in his chair. He had told her the events, starting with the messages he had started receiving to when Miranda informed him that she was just leading him on the entire time. Interestingly enough, he had omitted the parts that concerned Cerberus and how the organization was still active. Maybe part of him was still hoping that if Miranda ever did show back up he could at least say he had listened to her in that respect. Maybe he thought nothing more would come of Cerberus and there was no need to concern Elissa with nothing, either way, he did not tell her about that.

"I'm so sorry, James," said Elissa, putting her hand on his, squeezing it gently. "I wish you had told me from the start, I might've been able to help you out."

James gave a fleeting smile, "Believe me, Lola, you wouldn't have wanted to be in the middle of that mess. Could you do me a favor and not tell everyone else? I'd rather keep my stupid decisions just between you and me for the time being."

"Of course, James, I swear I won't tell anyone else," said Elissa, placing a hand over her heart as she promised to keep his secret.

"Thanks, Lola, I knew I could count on you," said James, kissing the back of the hand that held his. "What do I owe you for looking after my stupid self?"

Elissa scoffed, obviously offended that he had even suggested such a thing, "You don't owe me anything, I did this for you, because you needed help. What, you think that I expect everyone to repay me for every time I help a friend out?"

"No, but at least let me take you and Kaidan out to dinner, to say thank you to you both," said James. "I'm sure Kaidan's been missing you something fierce, since you've been spending so much time over here."

Elissa laughed, "Yeah, you might be right about that. Speaking of my patient and loving boyfriend, I think I should return to him tomorrow, after I clean up your place of course."

"I'll help you, I haven't felt like I've done anything useful in a long time," laughed James, smiling at her with a twinkle in his deep brown eyes.

"You haven't done anything useful," teased Elissa. "You should think of returning back to work soon too, Steve's been having EDI take your place and it's not the same there without you, or so he claims."

James nodded, the thought of his life returning to some kind of normal filled him with hope he had not felt since returning home. Maybe he could put these last few weeks behind him after all, move on from Miranda and build a better life. If only fate had worked in his favor.