Lorelai plucked nervously at her dress as she stood in front of the Gilmore mansion. Rory had pushed her to go to Friday night dinner even though it was the last thing she wanted to do. She had no desire to admit to her parents that her relationship was officially over. Although she had confessed to her mom already that she and Luke were having problems, it was something else to admit that the relationship was over. She didn't think she could handle seeing the disappointment in their face when she told them she failed again.
Smoothing her dress one last time, she reached out and rang the doorbell before she could stop herself. She stood nervously, shifting her weight on her feet as she waited for the door to open. The door opened, startling her from her thoughts and she looked up to see her mother's maid of the week standing in front of her.
"Hi, I'm Lorelai - the daughter. I'm here for dinner," she stated.
"Come in, let me take your purse," said the maid nervously, gathering Lorelai's things.
"Lorelai! So good to see you this week. Come in and let's get you a drink. Martini?" Emily stalked over and dragged Lorelai into the living room.
Lorelai sat quietly on the settee, watching as her mother prepared her a martini. Her hands shook nervously as she tried to get a grip on herself, and she clasped them tightly in her lap to conceal the tremor.
Before she could open her mouth, the doorbell rang. Lorelai looked at her mom quizzically and asked, "Are you expecting someone else? Rory said she couldn't make it this week."
"Well, I thought we just had so much fun with Christopher last week that I'd invite him again this week. He's still in town and jumped at the chance to come," Emily said with a smile on her face, handing Lorelai the martini.
Lorelai's heart stopped when Emily uttered Christopher's name. Her hands shook badly and she spilled her martini down the front of her dress.
"Lorelai! Honestly, I don't know what has gotten in to you! Where are your manners?" Emily chastised as she handed Lorelai a napkin. Lorelai pressed the napkin to her dress, attempting to clean up the spill. A weight settled on her chest, making it difficult to breathe.
"Hey, Lore! Long time no see!" Christopher said with a megawatt smile as he entered the room.
He strolled over to the couch where she sat frozen in shock and sat down next to her.
"Emily, thank you again for the invite," Christopher gushed with a smile. "I didn't have any plans and I'm always up for a night with some of my favorite Gilmore girls."
He slung an arm around Lorelai as he sat on the couch. Lorelai's face was white and she trembled at the feeling of his arm around him. She was completely blindsided at the turn the evening had taken.
"I...I need to go freshen up," Lorelai stammered as she extricated herself from Chris.
Forcing herself not to run from the room, she walked as calmly as she could upstairs and into her old room. Shutting the door behind her, she slid to the floor and breathed heavily. Her heart thudded wildly in her chest and she struggled to breathe. Her breaths came in wheezing gasps as she struggled to maintain control of herself. Clasping her arms tightly around herself, she tried to hold herself together. Tears leaked out of her eyes and she struggled not to sob. Stumbling to her feet, she barely made it to the ensuite bathroom before she fell before the toilet and panted over the toilet and struggled to control herself. It wouldn't do to fall apart; Emily would notice right away if something was amiss. There was no way she could tell her parents about the break up, not now, not with Christopher here. One thing was certain, she couldn't stay for dinner with him here and pretend everything was okay.
She heard a knock on the door of her bedroom before it creaked open. Shooting up in a panic, she attempted to wipe the tears away from her face. She heard footsteps across the carpet and struggled to compose herself.
"Are you ok, Lore?" Christopher asked, pausing in the doorway as he took in her form frozen in front of him. Tear tracks glistened in the mascara stains on her cheeks and her eyes were red and bloodshot.
"What are you doing up here?" Lorelai questioned shakily, nervously wiping at her cheeks.
"Look, your mom invited me and I couldn't say no. I told you I wanted to talk to you and I thought this would be the perfect opportunity," Chris explained.
"I can't...I can't do this right now. I don't want to see you, let alone talk to you here, at my parent's house!" Lorelai hissed at him. Turning away from him, she crossed to the sink and splashed some water on her cheeks. Washing away the mascara and tear tracks, she thought about what she was going to do.
"I'm sorry, Lore. If you would just have given me a chance to explain earlier when I called, I wouldn't have come tonight," he said walking over to her and placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Don't touch me!" Lorelai shrieked, pulling away from him. She turned from him and leaned her weight on her hands on the edge of the sink, clasping the edge tightly in her hands.
"Come on Lore," he pleaded. "Don't be like that. You are just as guilty for everything that happened as I am. You were the one that showed up at my door. I just went along with it."
"I was distraught!" She yelled, whirling to face him. "You could have chosen not to sleep with me! You could have turned me down! I might have been upset with you in the moment, but I wouldn't be saddled with this feeling of overwhelming guilt and disgust. I would have slept off my hangover and gone home. Luke and I may not have gotten back together, but at least we maybe could have been friends. Sleeping with you ruined any chance I might have had of keeping him as a friend."
Christopher's face softened as she took in how upset she was. Honestly, he did feel guilty for sleeping with her that night, but he'd never been able to resist her. He had hoped against all hope that her showing up had meant that she was ready to try something again. She had been the one to kiss him first and he just went along for the ride, hoping that a night with her would rekindle the undeniable attraction that had always existed between them.
Lorelai continued on, growing shriller as she continued, "And then, I tried to get you to stop and you wouldn't and do you know what that did to me? That crushed me Christopher! That hurt worse than all the crap Luke put me through these last couple months. I can't believe you would betray me like that. You raped me Chris..." Lorelai's last sentence came out in a whisper and she dissolved into tears.
Christopher stood frozen in place before he stuttered, "What? No...no...that wasn't rape...you wanted it Lore. I asked you if you were sure and you said yes. I...I would never do that to you." His face was pale and for once he was at a complete loss as to how to charm the woman in front of him.
Lorelai looked at the ground as she whispered brokenly, "It became rape when I said stop and you wouldn't. I tried to push you off, but you told me to be quiet. I wanted to stop...I know it wasn't fair to lead you on and I shouldn't have kissed you in the first place...but you should have stopped. Why didn't you stop?" She pleaded with him.
The agony on her face shook him to his core and he was utterly speechless. She had a strange look in her eyes, as if she was begging to understand what had happened between them. He'd never seen her look at him like that and it cut at him like a knife. The repercussions of his actions were beginning to settle in and he felt himself at a loss of how he was going to begin to fix it.
"I...I didn't think you were serious Lore...I don't know why I didn't. I was just so caught up in the moment. I would never hurt you, you know that," he begged her, trying to turn the situation around.
"I can't be here tonight with you Christopher. I can't trust you right now. I know you won't do something like that again, but I don't know if I can ever be your friend again. I need time to work everything out...my life is such a mess now. I need time," she whispered, looking away from him.
He caught the pain in her eyes as she struggled to control herself. Once again wiping the tears from her face, she brushed past him and back into her room. He stood there silently as she passed, giving her the space she obviously needed. After taking a moment to compose herself, she left the room, glancing once more at the man who still stood frozen in the bathroom.
Descending the stairs, she heard her parents arguing.
"Mom? Dad?" She said hesitantly as she entered the room.
Emily and Richard whirled around to face their daughter.
"I'm sorry, but I need to go. I'll come for dinner next week, but right now I really need to leave," she managed to stutter.
Her parents stood dumbfounded for a moment before Emily broke the silence, "We have a guest, Lorelai. It is incredibly rude to walk out before we've even sat down for dinner. I don't understand what has gotten in to you tonight. Your behavior has been appalling."
Lorelai stared at her mother before turning on her heel and heading toward the front door. Grabbing her purse, she wrenched open the front door. Not bothering to close it behind her, she jumped in her car and roared out of the driveway, leaving silence behind her.
Emily and Richard stood in silence, staring through the open front door at the spot occupied just seconds ago by their daughter's car. The silence was broken by Christopher, who had shuffled down the stairs. He stuck his hand out to shake Richard's hand and spoke, "Richard. Emily. Thank you for the dinner invitation, but I'm afraid I can't stay either. Have a good evening."
He turned and left, shutting the door behind him with a soft click.
AN: Thanks again for all the kind reviews. I apologize for not addressing everyone individually, but I hope everyone knows how much I appreciate you all taking the time to read my story. This might not have been the big confrontation between Chris and Lorelai that people wanted to see, but I think she is still so hurt that she doesn't have it in her to really hash it out with him and have a big argument - plus she wouldn't want to get to into it at her parent's house.
This story will continue to be fairly angsty and probably OOC for several more chapters. I've tried not to make anyone too OOC, but the very nature of this story is OOC. Hopefully they are all still fairly believable, even when placed in a situation that would never be canon. I know season 7 stories are tricky as there are many different opinions on who was in the wrong and right in Partings and afterwards. In my opinion, Luke was one of the biggest reasons the relationship fell apart. She would never have gone to Chris if he hadn't been pushing her away for months on end and then rejected her ultimatum. I do also think that Lorelai believed they were broken up when she went to Chris. However, I also think that in Luke's eyes, they were not broken up. So I think Luke considers her a cheater, and Lorelai considered them broken up. It's very reminiscent of the episode of Friends when Ross sleeps with another girl while he and Rachel are on a break. She believes he cheated, he insisted they didn't because they were on a break. Neither camp is really right or wrong. In my story, I DO have Lorelai feeling like she is a cheater for going to Chris even though this does not really follow what we were told in the show. I do believe she regretted sleeping with Chris (I mean - her face says it all when she wakes up), but not because she believes she cheated, but that she shouldn't have slept with someone else so soon. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I know there are different camps for people and I'm not trying to say what happens in my story is in any way "right" or "correct" in relation to the canon story. So I hope that anyone reading this can see this is just how I want my story to go - for my version of Lorelai I need her to feel guilty for going to Chris to help explain the depth of her emotional pain. The situation with Chris is a whole other source of pain entirely and adds to the pain of the situation with Luke.
Sorry for the ramble if you made it all the way to the end. Basically, to summarize, I know Partings has a lot of different meanings to different people and that this story is just one person's perspective on the situation.