John smiled from behind the pie table as he saw Sally up on Hoss's shoulders and watched as Lily led Ruth through the crowd. He also saw how carefully Lily chose the people to whom she introduced Ruth. He knew that Sally's illegitimacy was going to be a problem for some of the people of the town, but he also knew that having the Masons and the Cartwrights on her side was going to go a long way. He promised himself that he would see a lawyer first thing on Monday and begin the legal proceeding necessary to making Sally legally his daughter. He just hoped Sally would be happy about it. He took a big breath and focused on the pies.
"We're so glad you agreed to help with this, Dr. Fellows," the mayor whispered seriously, "it is so much easier to be a judge when you don't know the people involved. It is a badge of honor to the ladies and I have judged this contest so many times, I tend to know exactly which lady made which pie. Be thankful you aren't burdened with that knowledge."
John smiled at the mayor and began to make his way down the line of pies, marking his ballot as he went. In the end, Mrs. Wilson, the 75-year-old woman who always won, took the prize yet again.
"Clearly I'm not old enough to win with my pies," Lily groused with a smile.
"Thankfully," Jim said squeezing her waist and kissing her cheek, "I much prefer you to be a young, third place pie maker than an old, first place pie winner."
"Oh, Jim," Lily laughed and shoved at his chest, trying to get away, "I just wish for once, Mrs. Wilson would sit out a contest."
"Don't be a sore loser," Jim whispered quietly and tightening his grip on her waist "even if you are covering it with a smile, it's not an attractive quality." Lily blushed as he came closer to kiss her. He held on to her and she leaned away to look into his eyes, then she nodded, putting her arms around his neck and leaned back in to kiss him. Lily glanced at Ruth quickly hoping that she hadn't heard what Jim had said and when Ruth returned her smile with a quick nod, Lily blushed again, realizing that she had.
"Come along children," Lily said, quickly stepping away from Jim and holding out her arms to Will and Jenny, "we'll be going out to the Ponderosa for supper tonight. Say goodbye to the Fellows' and let's go congratulate Mrs. Wilson. Jim, honey, would you mind getting my pie? Maybe we can divvy up the rest of it for lunch today."
"Enjoy the rest of your Sunday, Ruth. See you later, Sally," Lily said, reaching out to touch Ruth's arm. "Now, I'm really close, so if you start to go stir crazy, come on over, with school starting tomorrow I know how quiet a house can get," she whispered to Ruth.
Lily led her children over to Mrs. Wilson and congratulated her honestly before letting the children run ahead of her. She hooked her arm through Jim's and they walked back hip to hip towards the mercantile.
John came out from behind the pie table and walked towards Ruth and Sally.
"Well, I guess the pie contest is the end of the bazaar. Everyone is starting to go home, are you two ready?" He held out his hand to Ruth, who kept her arms protectively around Sally as they walked slowly back to the house.
"Mama, why did that boy call me a bastard?" Sally asked as they neared the house
"Oh, Sally...it's because of me…" Ruth started.
"We'll discuss it inside after we change our clothes, Sally," John interrupted quickly. He moved them along as quickly as he could, and unlocking the door to the house, he guided them inside and shut the door firmly.
"Sally, change your clothes please and then we can talk about what happened at the bazaar, all right honey?" He gave her a forced smile and she nodded with a worried look on her face before going to her bedroom. John then turned to walk Ruth quickly to their bedroom and shut the door behind them.
"Ruth…" John said shaking his head and frowning.
"What? It is my fault that Sally's…a…a bastard," she forced the word out and began to tear up.
John forced a breath quickly out his nose with a growl and took her by the arm, led her to the bed and sat down next to her.
"Yes, Ruth, you had a part in Sally's illegitimacy, obviously you did, but you need to let go of your guilt about it," John took another deep breath and tried to get his annoyance at the whole day out of his system. "Love, Sally's had a good life, hasn't she? She's been loved and protected by you and your father. If she's just now hearing about the circumstances of her conception, then obviously it hasn't been a constant in her life." John took another deep breath. "Has she ever asked about her father?"
"Well, yes," Ruth said, taking in a watery breath.
John handed her his handkerchief and asked, "What did you tell her?"
"That he was away on important business and that he couldn't be with us…eventually she stopped asking."
John pulled Ruth to his chest and laid his cheek on the top of her head, "Well, Ruth, I think the time has come to tell Sally the real story."
"Oh, John, I can't. I just can't…" She said as she stood abruptly and moved away from him.
John followed her, put his arms around her from behind and pulled her back into his arms. He leaned his chin over her shoulder and said quietly into her ear, "I don't think you have a choice anymore, Ruth. Sally needs to know what happened so that when she has to deal with people like Jimmy and Mrs. Phillips, she'll be ready. It isn't fair to let her be blindsided like that," he took a deep breath and continued. "Lizzie Cartwright isn't always going to be around to deck the people saying those things."
Ruth laughed ruefully through the tears.
"She was wonderful, wasn't she? I'm sorry Adam made her sit under the tree afterward. I feel sort of guilty about that and one of us should have gone over to thank her for taking care of Jimmy Phillips and his horrible mother for Sally," she said as she laughed and mopped up her tears.
"I feel sort of guilty about that too, I'll make a point of thanking her the next time I see her. She's a scrapper, that one, but I think Adam has the right of it regarding her sitting under the tree. Now, we have our own eight year old to deal with, have you ever thought about what you might say to her?"
"Oh, John, I just hoped this day would never come!"
"Well, Ruth it's here, like it or not and I will be right there beside you when we talk to her and we'll tell her about the adoption, all right?" He kissed her. "Are you ready, love?"
Ruth nodded, wiped her eyes and smoothed her dress and the walked out into the living room to find Sally on the couch swinging her legs and reading a book.
"Sally, I…we…want to talk to you about today," Ruth said, taking a seat next to Sally and taking the book from her hands.
"I've often told you that your father was away and couldn't be with us…which is true," Ruth said hurriedly, "but not completely true." Ruth sighed and looked over her shoulder at John who had carried one of the dining room table chairs over and was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped. He was nodding in an encouraging way.
"Your father and I were never married. Did you know that?" Ruth said, as she looked back at Sally. "We should have gotten married, but after…after you were on the way, we… he decided we shouldn't marry," Ruth fumbled.
"Why didn't you get married, Mama?" Sally asked with confusion.
"Oh, Sally, I was so happy that you were going to be born…but your father, he didn't think he was ready for a child or a family. So, he decided it was better that we didn't get married."
"He didn't want me to be in his family?" Sally asked sadly.
"No, Sally," Ruth said as she started to cry "and he didn't want me either."
Sally started crying right along with her mother and then crawled up into her lap. John quickly took a seat next to them and wrapped his arms around them both.
"Sally, I know it's going to sound really selfish of me, but I can't help but think that if your father hadn't decided he wasn't ready for a family, we would never have met and you, your mama and me would not be the family we are now and I am so glad that that happened. I want to make it official and legal; Sally, I want to adopt you. I already think of you as my daughter and there is a way we can make it so everyone will know that you're my daughter, even the Jimmy Phillips' of the world. What do you say?"
Sally looked up at him through her tears, "But what about my other father? Am I his daughter too?"
John took a deep breath, "Sally, what do you think a father is?"
"Well, Lizzie said that papas do things with their children and explain things…"
"That's right…and the most important job of a papa is to help their children grow up to be good people, which means Sally girl, that they need to be around and your other father hasn't been around, so I'm ready to take on that role. I really want to be your papa, Sally. I want everybody to know that I want to be your papa and that's why I want to adopt you, but I want you to want it too."
"Will I have to call you Papa?" Sally asked.
"You won't have to, but I hope you'll want to," John said with a hopeful smile.
"Will I have to mind you?" Sally asked timidly.
"Sally," John said seriously, "even if you decide you don't want me to adopt you. You're still going to have to mind me. I want to help you grow up to be a good person and that means along with taking you places and explaining things and teaching you how to do things, when you misbehave it will be my job, mine and your mama's, to discipline you."
"Like Lizzie and Adam?" Sally asked looking down at her hands.
"Just like Lizzie and Adam," John said, nodding.
"Adam made Lizzie sit under the tree when she stood up for me," Sally said as she looked up at her mother.
"Honey, I think he made her sit under the tree because she got into a fight, not because she stood up for you. She could have stood up for you without jumping on Jimmy's feet. John and I were talking about that, by the way, we need to thank Lizzie for what she did. I think she was a really good friend to you. Don't you think?" Ruth said quietly.
Sally nodded and played with her fingers for a while, thinking about things.
"Yes," she finally said, looking at John and then at her mother.
"Yes, what?" John asked hopefully.
"Yes, I want to adopt you and call you papa."
"Oh, Sally," Ruth said, tearing up again as John hugged them both. They sat like that for a few minutes, when John cleared his throat.
"Sally, you asked about something that we haven't answered yet. Jimmy called you a bastard do you know what that is?"
"No, John," Sally said, shaking her head, "I asked Mr. Mason but he didn't answer."
"It's a bad word and it's a mean word, but I want you to know what it means because you might hear it again."
Sally looked up at him with innocent eyes and John regretted having to lay this burden on her shoulders.
"You remember I said I wanted to adopt you and make you legally my child?"
"Yes," Sally said nodding.
"It's so that if anything were to happen to me and I died, you would get everything that's mine…you and your mama. It's called an inheritance. Do you understand?"
"No…" Sally said shaking her head.
"Well, when people die there are laws that say who gets the things that belonged to the person who died. So, if something were to happen to me, your mama would get this house and everything in it and the little bit of money I have in the bank because we are legally married. I want to make you legally my child so that if something were to happened to both me and your mother, the house and the money would be yours, but we need to make that official because of your other papa."
"But I don't want anything to happen to you and mama," Sally whined.
"Nothing's going to happen to us, Sally, not for a long, long time, " Ruth said reassuringly. "But everybody dies sometime and John wants to be sure that everything we have is yours."
Sally still looked confused.
"Sally, I love you and I want to take care of you, you and your mama, and legally adopting you will make that easier."
"But what does that have to do with Jimmy calling me a bastard?"
"I guess I did get a little off track there, didn't I?" John said, taking a deep breath.
"Sally," Ruth said slowly, "your other papa and I weren't legally married which means your are illegitimate and the bad word for that is bastard. It isn't your fault, but it's the truth and Jimmy was being mean and hateful when he said it. Your other papa and I should have married like John and I did, but we didn't, so, your other papa can walk away and pretend that you don't belong to him…," at those words, Ruth took a deep breath to try and hold off the threatening tears, "which is what he did. John wants to make you legitimate and that means we have to do the legal paperwork for him to adopt you and be your legal papa, not just your papa of the heart like he is now."
"Then Jimmy can't call me a bastard?"
"Right, he may still do it, but he would be wrong, because you would have a legal, legitimate father, which would be John."
"You'd be my papa?" Sally asked looking up at John.
"Yes, Sally in every way," John said nodding.
"All right," Sally said, hopping down off of Ruth's lap, picking up her book and sitting in the chair that John had moved from the dining room.
"All right," John said clapping his hands together, smiling with a weak smile and standing, "I'll contact a lawyer tomorrow."
Ruth stood up unsteadily and said, "I guess I'll get to work on dinner. Lily said I could soak that smoked ham you got from the Smith's and I've been doing that since day before yesterday. Will you come and look at it, John?"
John glanced at Sally who seemed to be reading without a care in the world and followed Ruth to the kitchen.
"Should we be worried about how easily she's accepting all of this?" John asked with a raised eyebrow.
"I don't know, John. We may have to talk to her some more, especially after she gets back from school tomorrow. I don't think that bully, Jimmy Phillips, is going to let this go, even with Lizzie around," Ruth frowned. "It worries me, John."
"I know, Ruth, but I don't think it can be avoided. There were plenty of people who were welcoming to you and we'll just have to try to shield her as best we can from the people who will always label her a bastard. I am going to get that paperwork done as quickly as I can, though, and not borrow trouble."
"I know you're right, John, but I can't help but worry about her. I just wish she didn't have to pay for my mistake."
John pulled Ruth softly to him and held her as they gazed at Sally, he said, "It's going to be all right, Ruth. We'll get this family through the days to come and it will be all right. Let's see how that ham is looking," he took one more quick glance at Sally, and then directed his attention towards the ham, knowing that what he had told Ruth was true, there was nothing they could do to avoid what was to come and they just needed to put their heads down and get through it.