Chapter Six: TwiWhy?
"Sheldon, you ready?" Penny said as she stuck her head in the door.
"Oh, hi, Penny," Leonard said, waving a little awkwardly from his perch on the couch.
"Hey, Leonard, what's up?"
"Oh, nothing much. Just doing some research online."
"Oh, about what?" Leonard got cagey and jittery.
"Ah, well... fine, I was playing Age of Conan."
"I thought so," Penny smirked victoriously. She settled back, crossing her bare legs and swinging her foot in time to an imaginary rhythm.
"So, what are you guys doing tonight?" Leonard asked, trying to sound cool and smooth but squawking like a baby bird. She twisted her lips into a vindictive grin. Leonard couldn't quite tell if she was directing it at him or Sheldon.
"I'm taking him to see Twilight."
"Twilight?" Leonard had never heard of it.
"Love story between a human and vampire."
"Really?" he snarled. "Why?"
"It's my turn," she said simply, picking at her fingernails. Sheldon came walking briskly in to see Penny lounging on his couch.
"You're late," she accused.
"I disagree. You're early," he shot back.
"Let's just go," she sighed.
"Are you driving him, Penny?"
"No, we're to walk. It's not that far," Sheldon demanded.
"Fine, fine, I wore comfortable shoes anyway." Penny was half out the door when she turned on Sheldon. "You asked Leonard if he wanted to come with us, didn't you?"
"No," he said exasperated, "Though I very much doubt he'd want to go. I don't even want to go. I looked this movie up online. A vegetarian vampire, Penny?"
"Ask him," she hissed. He sighed and turned around, the look he got when his mother ordered him around playing on his face.
"Penny would like to know if you would like to go to the movies with us?"
"That's very nice, Sheldon, but I think I'll stay in tonight." Leonard's little monster was banging away at his brain for the stupidity of the decision. The monster said "go, watch them. Make them know you disapprove. Sabotage!" And yet, Leonard didn't think he had the emotional fortitude to watch them converse and interact, to see Sheldon make Penny laugh, to see Penny shine a new light in Sheldon's eyes. Leonard saw it. Even when they were fighting and sighing at each other, like earlier, there was a difference in Sheldon's eyes. He enjoyed their little verbal spars, even if he felt he and Penny were unevenly matched. Leonard just looked away, hearing the door shut was like hearing a part of him quit trying. Defeated, the monster kicked hm in the side, making him wince at his own cowardice.
"Penny! I will not!"
"Sheldon," Penny sighed, "it's my turn and we will see what I want." Sheldon and Penny walked towards the ticket line as they squabbled, bickering over movie choices and reviews. Penny didn't hear the female voices calling her name.
"Penny! Hey, girl!" Penny finally turned around, handing Sheldon the money and threatened him to not buy the right tickets.
"If you don't," she warned, "you have no way of knowing your food is untouched." Sheldon sighed. Great power, indeed. Penny turned towards her friends.
"Hi, girls. What are you here for?"
"To see a movie, Penny, obviously," Sheldon said as he waited for their change. She hit him, not noticing the strange looks her friends were giving her.
"Just go in and find the best seat in the theater. I'll be in in a minute." Sheldon handed her her ticket.
"Just don't come in late. You know how I hate-"
"Late movie goers, I know." She pushed him in the door.
"That your new...boyfriend, Pen?" Carol said slowly, not believing.
"Nah, that's just my friend Sheldon." She tried to brush it off that they would think they were together. It was an honest mistake. She was a woman, he...could pass for human. They were at the movies...together...alone together. She tried to change the subject but they didn't seem all that interested in conversation. "Hey, are you here to see Twilight?"
"Yeah, we are. It's so romantic," Carol sighed.
"Robert Pattinson's not that bad, either," Jessica leered.
"I'd tap that," the first giggled madly. Penny sighed a little. It sounded so middle-school to her and she felt like she was above that anymore.
"You can sit with us, if you like," Penny offered. The smile slipped from both of their faces. They couldn't help but to fake it and say yes, knowing it would hurt Penny's feelings to say anything different. They made their way into the theater to hear Sheldon making a loud "mah!" sound.
"What the hell is your boyfriend doing?" Penny sighed. They would never get this right, would they?
"He's not my boyfriend. And he's testing the acoustics of the theater."
"He's doing what?"
"He looking for the best seat in the house." She knew this was going to be a long night. Perhaps making Sheldon see this movie wasn't to be so vindictively sweet as she thought. They seated themselves and Penny tried to make polite introductions.
"These are my friends Carol and Jessica, Sheldon. Girls, my friend, Sheldon." The girls held out their hands to shake Sheldon's but he eyed them like they were but trained monkeys before Penny smacked his arm and he grudgingly shook their hands (more like barely touched their fingertips) before digging for the hand sanitizer in his pocket. Penny snatched the bottle from his hand and stashed it in her purse, hissing "that's rude, Sheldon!" before smiling and apologizing for him. By the Grace of God, the movie started and Penny was able to lose herself in the romance of Edward and Bella. Sheldon, though, was not impressed. He would snort derisively during romantic sections and outright laughed during Edward's "you could never run from me" speech. The movie over, Penny tried to bid her friends goodbye before Sheldon could start his analytical diatribe but he barely waited for the lights to come back up.
"Penny, that was ridiculous! How do you drag me to these things?"
"I watched the X-Files for you, it was your turn." Penny's friends couldn't help but watch, wondering what kind of hold Sheldon had over Penny to have her watching that crazy show her grandfather had liked about aliens and the FBI.
"The dialogue was atrocious." Carol had no clue what that meant but it sounded bad.
"It's romantic, Sheldon, and they're teenagers."
"He's not. He's roughly 108 years old! He should have the logic of the ages behind him but I would be surprised if he could think beyond a basic high school reasoning level."
"He has more Ph. Ds than you do, Sheldon." Sheldon had a Ph.D? Jessica couldn't believe Penny was with a man who had a Ph. D!
"In what? Literature?" he sneered.
"And he's a medical doctor! You know, I'm not so sure you aren't jealous of him."
"Maybe his immortality but not of his looks nor his seeming art with the female sex. Besides, I would rather find a way to make me immortal without the need for blood. And I haven't even mentioned his 'vegetarianism'," Sheldon's face showed his obvious disdain for the whole idea. Penny knew a cross-cultural analysis of the legends of vampirism was coming so she hurriedly guided him (more like shoved him) down the stairs, turning to wave at her friends who had been glued to their spots listening.
"Bye, girls, it was good seeing you! Sorry about him," she mouthed back. They waved, fake little smiles on their faces.
"He must be damn good in bed or she wouldn't keep him around," Carol said, the smile never faltering.
"Mmhmm," Jessica agreed.
AN: to be continued.