Beauty from Pain

When I wake up, I find a note on my side table.

Caitlin,

Kevin called with news on the tablet so we are going to go see him. We should be back in a few days. If anything comes up, we got you a cell phone and put our numbers into it. We also found a cane to help you get around. Have fun and don't leave the Bunker.

Sam and Dean

Next to the note is the cell phone they got me and leaning against the little table is a cane. I check and sure enough, their numbers are in it. Just for fun, I change their names to Moose and Squirrel to annoy them if they ever see. I lay here, wondering how I'm going to entertain myself for the next few days since I can't move around too much due to still weak muscles.

Then it hits me, this is when they begin the trials that lead to pain and heartbreak. I become really sad and decide to text Sam.

Me: Be careful, I'll try not to trash the Bunker while y'all are gone ;)

I check the time and am shocked! It's already five in the afternoon and I just woke up.

I realize I haven't been taking my meds, and evidently, last night was enough to cause another episode.

The phone vibrates and it's Sam.

Moose: Did you just wake up?

Me: Yeah, last night triggered another episode

Moose: You haven't been taking your meds?

Me: I'm a very forgetful person :/

Moose: Promise you'll start taking them again. I don't want you to have a really bad episode while we're gone

Moose: Check in every day so we know you're okay

Me: Alright :)

Moose: And don't overwork yourself, you're still weak from your coma. There is some food in the freezer, help yourself

I get up and make the slow journey into the kitchen, with the help of the cane, to see what they left to eat. I can tell the boys went shopping because the freezer is stocked with frozen chicken nuggets and pizzas.

I throw a pizza in the oven and when it's done, I grab it and a coke and head to the library. I collapse into a chair at the table as my strength leaves me. After I finish, I grab my journal and write down everything that happened. I must fall asleep, because I wake up to my phone vibrating on the table.

I check the time and it's already noon. This is normal because I had stayed up really late the night before. I open the message from Dean.

Squirrel: Just checking in to make sure you're awake and safe

Me: I'm fine, just stayed up super late writing in my journal

Squirrel: Okay, Sam and I got a case up in Idaho. We may not be back for a few days. Will you be okay on your own?

Me: I'll be fine. Just be safe, both of you

I finish up my journal entry and go about my day. I grab a new book to read and settle in.

I continue in this fashion for a few days until Sam and Dean finally return.

"We're back!" Sam calls as they descend the stairs early in the morning.

"Welcome back, guys! How's Kevin?" I reply, having been in the library extremely early that morning.

"Stressed and running himself into the ground." Sam says sadly.

"Maybe one day I can visit him." I suggest. "It might be good for him to interact with someone his own age."

"Yeah" Sam says with a smile. "I think he'd like that. I'll ask him sometime."

"You didn't leave the Bunker or anything, did you?" Dean asks with a concerned face.

"No, mom. I was a good girl. Besides, I can't exactly walk very far right now." I tease.

"Good. I want you to have more protection when you go out. I don't trust just the charm. I wish you would get a tattoo."

"What are you going to do, sew an anti-possession symbol on every piece of clothing I own?" I joke.

I instantly regret it as I see a look cross over his face. "That's actually a good idea." he states. "That's exactly what I'm going to do."

"I was joking!" I complain.

"It's that or a tattoo." Dean counters.

I huff, "Fine."

"If you go get your clothes now, I can get it done and we can go for a drive. I'm sure you're getting a bit of cabin fever."

"Alright." I reply and set off to my room.

I don't have many clothes, so between Sam and Dean it doesn't take very long. I'm actually pretty impressed they are able to do it.

"When did y'all learn how to embroider?" I ask with a teasing tone.

"It's not really embroidering. More like stitching, which we learned to stitch up injuries." Dean explains.

After they finish, I change and we all go for a drive. They surprise me by taking me to a zoo near Salina, Kansas. When we pull up, I look at them in shock. "Since when do you guys go to a zoo?"

"We figured you could use the fresh air and I remembered that you love animals, so we decided to come here." Sam replies.

"Thanks guys!" I exclaim as I smile at them, but then I frown. "How am I going to be able to do anything?" I ask. "I can't exactly walk for very long at the moment, even with the cane."

"We figured we would rent you a wheelchair." Sam replies with a grin.

POVPOVPOVPOVPOV

Sam and Dean carefully help Caitlin out of the Impala and head to the ticket booth. After getting their admission tickets, they rent a wheelchair and head out to explore the zoo.

They can't remember the last time they were at a zoo for fun, and not a case. The last time at a zoo was for a case up in New York. That had definitely been an interesting day.

They reach a crossroad and look at the map they picked up. "Alright. Do you want to go right, toward the big cats and apes, or do you want to go left, toward the antelope and hyenas?" Sam asks Caitlin. He figures she'll choose right, but wants to give her the options.

She takes the map from him and looks at it. "Left. I spent a lot of time at the park with big cats and apes. It will be nice to see something different." she replies, shocking both of them.

"Also, that's an African Painted Dog, not a hyena." she corrects with a smile, laughing at the confused looks on their faces.

"We'll just see." Dean challenges with a wink.

Dean had started pushing her right, but quickly switches to left and they set off. The Rolling Hills Zoo isn't very big, so they let her spend however much time she wants at each exhibit.

When they get to the area on the map they had argued about, they discover that Caitlin was right. Right there on the sign 'African Painted Dogs'.

"How could you tell that from a drawing?" Sam asks.

"The legs are too long for a hyena, plus the coloring. I worked with hyenas and they have shorter legs and are also stockier." she explains.

She tells them different facts she learned from all the animal books she read when she was younger. She even identifies some of the animals before they see the sign with their name.

Dean whistles, impressed. "You sure know a lot about animals, Cat."

"They're my passion. I just find them so interesting." she enthuses. "I was actually studying to become a Zoologist. My parents weren't happy since there isn't a lot of money in that kind of job, but I would be miserable if I had to work with only people."

"Well I think you would've been amazing." Sam says.

Any time they come upon an animal Caitlin had worked with, she would tell them a story. "The best day I can remember at the park, was when I got to go in with the lemurs we used for tours."

"They were running around, jumping on my back, and riding me around while I swept out their enclosure. They even nibbled on my ears!" she giggles, remembering that great time while they are watching the lemurs in front of them.

"I was in charge of the kangaroo near the end. She was really sweet and loved her bananas! I was surprised she let me pet her." Caitlin tells them as they come to the roos.

"Camels give fuzzy kisses." she comments casually when they reach the camel.

"How on earth do you even know that?" Dean asks incredulously.

"I may have 'kissed' one a few times…" she admits, blushing at their disgusted faces. "It was a thing we did for tourists. We had them stick a camel treat between their lips and our camel would grab it from them with his lips. I demonstrated how to do it for tours a few times. I used to joke that he was my boyfriend since he had kissed me so much." she chuckles.

The brothers just shake their heads fondly. She has become so open, sharing all her knowledge and interesting stories with them. When they had chosen the zoo, they had no idea how much it would transform their little sister.

She had insisted on taking pictures with her new phone, and Dean is certain there are a few embarrassing ones of him. He and Sam had been secretly taking turns capturing Cat's reactions to everything. Sam had gotten a great one of her laughing merrily as Dean raced her down the path.

By the time they finish, it's dinnertime. Sam had thought ahead and packed some sandwiches, which they had eaten for lunch, but they wanted to go somewhere for dinner. The boys are happy to see a bright eyed and beaming Caitlin in the backseat as they head to a local diner for burgers.

POVPOVPOVPOVPOV

I'm still shocked that happened. I never thought they would go out of their way to do something I would like. I sit in the back and look through the pictures I took on my phone as we drive toward a diner.

I laugh as I see one of Dean being chased by a goose. He had been eating his sandwich and the goose decided it wanted a bite. I smile at one with the three of us posed in front of the African Painted Dog exhibit. The boys are both looking grumpy as I smile victoriously. A random passerby had heard our discussion and suggested the picture.

We finally arrive at the diner and get burgers. I manage to manipulate them into getting me a chocolate milkshake as well, claiming I should get a prize for winning our bet. Afterward, we head back to the Bunker. Dean and I annoy Sam by singing along to the radio obnoxiously on the entire drive back. Dean seems pleased that I know so many classic rock songs.

When we arrive home, Sam turns in for the night. "Is he okay?" I ask Dean. "He seems a little more subdued than usual."

"He's just tired from the hunt." Dean replies. I can tell that he knows it's more, but I don't push it. I know he just completed the first trial and that it will slowly begin to kill him. Even if I told them, it's too late, so I remain silent.

"I think I'm going to turn in too." I say.

"Okay, you've been taking your meds, right?" Dean asks in a brotherly way.

"Yeah, I don't enjoy the episodes any more than y'all do." I reply. "Goodnight, Squirrel." I say with a smirk.

"Night, Cat" he responds with his own smirk. While I've accepted the nickname, when he says it like that it's a tiny bit annoying.

"Twit"

"Bitch"

With that, we each go to our own room and I fall asleep with a smile on my face as I remember our outing.

The next day, Sam wakes me up.

"Hey Caitlin, sorry to wake you up." he says as he opens my door.

"It's fine. What did you want?" I ask blearily.

"Just wanted to tell you that we have to head out again. An old friend texted that he needs help. We'll be in Missouri, so if you need anything just call." he tells me.

"Alright, Sam. Promise y'all will be safe." I reply.

He smiles at me. "I promise."

They leave after that and I'm once again confined to the Bunker.

I'm reading, seeing as there is nothing else to do, when I hear a scratching and whining at the door of the Bunker.

I decide to investigate, and as I ease the door open slowly, I am met by an adorable pure black dachshund. "Hi there." I coo at it. I have a weakness for dachshunds since that's what my dog was. It looks up at me and wags its tail. "Are you lost?" I ask as I check for tags on the collar. All they say is 'Tor'.

"Hmm, Tor, looks like you don't have any owner tags. Would you like to stay with me while I try to find your owner?" He just walks right in and sits at my feet. He is really friendly so I pick him up and take him down the stairs.

"You're going to have to have a bath first. Dean won't be happy I brought a dog in here." I take him to the bathroom and give him a bath using my shampoo.

After he is clean and dried off, I continue reading, with him curled up in my lap. I make some chicken nuggets for dinner and give some to Tor since we don't have any dog food.

At the end of the day, I pass out on my bed with Tor beside me after texting Sam and Dean to let them know I'm okay. I find myself plunged back into the day of my kidnapping. The witch is standing over me with her knife as she cuts into my skin. I scream in pain as she begins to torture me with cuts and punches.

"This can't be real, Dean said he killed you!" I gasp at the witch as she makes yet another cut into my skin. The physical beating as well as the blade is new. It's like a nightmare version of that day, but I can feel all the pain.

"Oh sweetie, you've been here the whole time." she cackles cruelly. "You must have dreamed that up, no one is coming for you."

I really panic at that. Could it be true? Could I have dreamed up my rescue? As the hours tick by, I convince myself that the witch is right, it was all a dream and no one is coming for me.

I watch as she heals all my injuries and then begins carving once more. The pain is excruciating and I keep wishing for the bliss of unconsciousness, but it never comes. This continues for days as I am slowly driven mad by excruciating pain and despair.

POVPOVPOVPOVPOV

Sam and Dean finish up in Missouri and head back to the Bunker. "It's been days since we left, why has she only checked in once?" Dean worries.

"Relax, Dean. I'm sure she's just absorbed in a book or something." Sam assures him.

"What if she had another attack?" Dean continues to worry.

"She has been taking her meds, Dean. Don't worry. The Bunker is the safest place she could be." Sam replies, though he is worried himself.

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Dean concedes.

They arrive back at the Bunker, Caitlin nowhere in sight. "Cat? We're home." Sam shouts, but is met by silence. "It's kind of late, maybe she's in her room." he reasons.

They both head to her room and as they get close, they can hear her gasping and whimpering in pain. They look at each other then rush into the room to find Caitlin thrashing on the bed with a man standing over her.

"Get away from her, you son of a bitch!" Dean shouts as he rushes the man. The guy looks at him with a smirk and disappears. Caitlin continues to writhe on the bed as the boys try to wake her up. "Caitlin, snap out of it!" Dean exclaims as he shakes her.

"This is like an episode gone wrong!" Sam says as they fail to wake her up. "Whoever that guy was, he had to have caused this."

"I'm going to rip his lungs out!" Dean roars as he storms out of the room to try to hunt the guy down.

"Why do bad things keep happening to you?" Sam sighs as he scoops up Caitlin and cradles her against himself.

He is hoping that physical comfort might at least lessen the obvious terror and pain she is going through. It seems to work a bit, as she stops flailing around, but she is still emitting pained noises. Sam rocks her back and forth on the bed as he whispers soothingly to her.

Dean returns to the room and Sam can tell he didn't find the mystery man. "How is she?" Dean asks.

"She quit thrashing, but she's still whimpering occasionally." Sam responds, looking up from Caitlin with sad eyes.

"We should have come back as soon as she stopped answering our calls and texts." Dean laments.

"We thought she'd be safe. Nothing should have been able to get in the door." Sam replies, trying to keep Dean from blaming himself.

"You realize that means she had to let him in." Dean states as he looks at Caitlin. "We told you not to leave or let anyone in, why didn't you listen?"

At that moment, a black dachshund pads into the room and sits in front of them. "What the...?" Dean says, at a loss to where it came from.

"I'm guessing that is why she opened the door and consequently let the man in." Sam says, looking down at the wagging dog. "She has a soft spot for animals and probably wanted some company."

Sam stoops down and checks the dog for tags, "It just says 'Tor', no address or phone number." He catches a whiff of what he recognizes as Caitlin's shampoo from the dog. "Looks like she gave him a bath. She must know how you feel about dogs."

"Well he can't stay. No dogs allowed." Dean states firmly.

"Do you really think that's the best idea?" Sam asks. "When she wakes up from this nightmare, he could help her to cope. Plus, she'll be sad if he isn't here after she obviously took a liking to him."

Dean relents after Sam's logic sinks in. "Fine. But he's your responsibility until she wakes up."

"Do we have a plan on how to wake her up?" Sam questions. "This is obviously something supernatural, so we can't take her to the hospital."

"Looks like we have some research to do." Dean replies.

Sam sets Caitlin back onto the bed and they head to the library to research a cure for her. Tor remains in the room with Caitlin, and after the boys are buried in research, he transforms back into a man.

"Well they were half right. I mean, you did let me in, after all." he sneers to Caitlin with an evil glint in his eye. He places his hands on the sides of her head, and her distress increases.

A/N: Wow, 3 chapters in one day! Thanks for all the great reviews and PMs! Next chapter should be up tomorrow.

Added A/N: The Winchesters' zoo case that is referenced is from the first book, Nevermore, in the Supernatural book series (pretty good series IMO)