SHOUT OUTS/ANSWERS
Blue Peanut M And M: Glad you're liking so far, glad you like it. Hope this is soon enough.
Windyfontaine: I take it that's good. Glad you think so. Yep. Goody, you're likin' my Jo. Here you go. Yeah, that tends to happen, don't it? Thanks. I will.
Calistra: Thanks. Here's more.
Snowchic92: Good 'wow'? Glad you think so. Well, he never talked 'bout it when it happened, so he still has a bunch of different emotions. You have a good point though
Jayme: Thanks. Glad you think so.
Still Awesome2009: Cool. Thanks. Here you go, glad you like it.
Maxandkiz: Yep. That he did. Yes, he is. Well, we'll see. Hope you still think so.
Spuffyshipper: Yep. Don't worry, he's Dean. Yikes, those are long names. Well, enjoy.
Fairyofmusic: Yep. Okey-doke. Thanks.
Friendly: Cool. Thanks.
Irishgirl9: Yeah. We'll see. Yep. Here's more.
Poaetpainter: Yeah.
Gothraven89: Yep. Okay, here's the update. Thank you for the kind words. Okey-doke. Here you go.
DISCLAIMER
Belongs to Eric Kripke and the CW. I only own the plot.
Ellen, Ash, Jo, and Bobby stared at the brothers in shocked silence. Sam had been raped? Man, that poor boy, Ellen thought to herself. No wonder what that demon tried to make him do to me hit him so hard, Jo realized. Raped? He was raped? Why didn't John tell me? I would've helped him kill the freak, Bobby thought angrily. Whoa. That is just---not right, Ash silently commented.
"Look, Sam, she played mind games with you. She probably had you convinced that you liked what she was doing, but that's dead wrong. She was the one who got off on preying on innocent young boys," Dean reminded.
"Then…why do I still feel like it's my fault?" Sam questioned softly.
"I don't know, Sam. Maybe 'cause you never talked about it, got it out of your system," Dean said.
"I can usually just block it out---you know, forget," Sam told him.
"Sam, you can't just push it aside. You need to face this," Dean commented. Sam blew out a heavy breath.
"I know. I know," he agreed softly. Dean helped Sam up. "I just---I just figured, you know, if I focused all I was feeling on the hunt, it wouldn't matter. You know, I could just take all my frustrations out on the creatures, and it'd be fine. I wouldn't feel anything, and we wouldn't have to talk," he continued, wiping his tears away.
"I remember there were some times you were a little more gung hu for a hunt than normal," Dean recalled.
"It's when the memories would come back. I just took it out on whatever we happened to be hunting at the time," Sam confirmed.
"Well, it's constructive," Ellen said positively.
"Yeah, I guess," Sam agreed.
"You feel up to eating?" Dean queried.
"Sure. I could eat," Sam told him.
"Great. I'll heat up the pizza," Dean stated. With that, he walked off.
"How 'bout I get you a beer?" Ellen offered.
"Yeah, something tells me you're going to need one," Jo agreed. She moved past her mother and went to the back of the counter.
"Heineken okay?" she queried.
"You got Miller?" Sam requested.
"Miller Time, gotcha," Jo agreed. She got the desired beer and gave it to him. About this time, Dean came back with the food.
"Feeding time! Come and get it, boys," he called, placing it on the counter. Sam shook his head with a scoff.
"Dude, you have weird tastes in movies," he stated.
"What are you talking about? You like it too," the other man reminded.
"Knock it off," Ellen interjected. They began eating, and for a few minutes, the only thing heard was chewing.
"You know, the first time it happened, I had no idea what to think. I honestly thought she just wanted to talk about a bad grade," Sam said suddenly.
"And after?" Ellen asked softly.
"Being fourteen, my first thought was, 'It wasn't supposed to happen this way'. I mean, I always imagined my first time being with the woman I loved, not some sick, twisted---" Sam's sentence trailed off.
"Did Jessica ever know?" Dean queried.
"Yeah. I---uh, kinda freaked out the first time we went to---" Sam answered, once again trailing off.
"What did you tell her?" Bobby questioned.
"I copped to the rape. I mean, it was Jessica. It was hard to lie to her. Barely managed with the whole 'Dad's at his hunting cabin' ruse," Sam said.
"Let me guess: you were just Sam to her," Dean surmised.
"Surprisingly…yeah," Sam confirmed. "Of course, I didn't tell her it had gone on for six months…that I kept to myself," he continued.
"Six months?" the others asked.
"Yeah. I kept it hidden for six months…until Dean found out when he came to pick me up from school," Sam told them. Dean's Adam's apple wobbled. He remembered that day. Going to pick up Sammy, and then finding his history teacher with her hands all over him. He couldn't remember a time he had been more ticked. "After that, it just kind of---came out. There was a trial, I had to go to court, other kids told the truth---and they put in her prison," the younger Winchester continued.
"And after the trial?" Bobby asked.
"We went to Napa and smoked a poltergeist," Sam responded.
"You didn't go to counseling?" Ellen asked in surprise.
"No. Dad, offered, but I chose hunting," Sam answered.
"Yeah, he was pretty ruthless for a while," Dean commented.
"Come on, I wasn't that bad," Sam objected.
"You kiddin' me? Dad was gettin' worried," Dean stated.
"Really?" Sam asked.
"Yeah. You were different for a while, Sam," Dean commented. "We were both relieved when you calmed down," he continued.
"So, why do feel like it's your fault?" Jo wondered.
"Cause I didn't tell anyone the first time it happened, I let it continue---" Sam's voice trailed off.
"Sam, you were fourteen, a kid. She didn't have the right to seduce you," Ellen said.
"Yeah. Sounds to me like she was wired wrong," Ash added.
"That's what Dean said," Sam said with a small chuckle. "But you know, now this succubus---" he continued.
"Hey, you just keep goin' with the research. We'll take care of this freak," Jo declared.
"You know, my offer of you doin' research still stands," Dean told her.
"Thanks, I appreciate it, but I'll be fine," Jo assured. Sam finished off his beer, feeling a sense of relief. His family finally knew the truth, and surprisingly…he felt free.