So... here is chapter 5! :D It's kind of a "transition chapter" (can I say that?). Still no angst! Also, it contains a medical case. Unfortunately I'm no doctor, so although I did some research, there may be some mistakes.
Thank you once again for your support and for your patience! Approximately, I think the next update will come on Monday or Tuesday, and it's going to be a big one!
In the meantime, enjoy! :)
V. Something There
"Dr. House?"
House was sitting in his easy chair, reading Celebs, when he heard Jones's voice. He glanced up and looked at her. She was leaning on the door, with a too familiar blue folder in her hands.
New case, he thought sitting up.
"We have a three months old child with digestive problems, malabsorption and frequent infections. She's had an otitis recently " Jones explained, handing him the file.
House took it and browsed it quickly. Then passed it back to the girl.
"A baby that pukes and gets sick? Shocker! Tell her parents to chill out, she will grow antibodies and she will be fine in a couple of months. Case solved"
Having said that, he went back to his magazine, and heard Jones leave.
About ten minutes later, he heard again the sound of heels clicking on the floor, but this time, when he looked up, Cuddy was standing there, holding the same folder.
He swallowed. He couldn't remember the last time she was in his office.
"You didn't take the case" she said, taking a few steps inside.
"No need to. She's fine. She just has irrationally worried parents" he replied shrugging.
But Cuddy was not going to give up on this. She knew these people, she cared about them. She sat down on the footstool, next to his bad leg.
His prosthetic leg, she mentally corrected herself.
They still hadn't talked about it. Well, not that they talked about anything else. After the episode with Rachel, about a week earlier, they went back to ignoring each other.
There were a couple of things that Cuddy wanted to ask him, she just never had the occasion to. It was really not the kind of discussion one could initiate just like that. Plus, she knew she kind of had no right to ask him anything. The words that she had told him that day, in Wilson's office, still echoed in her mind sometimes, as she regretted them a little bit more every day.
She also thought a lot about what happened that night in his apartment, and what he had told her. She never really thought about her own role in the whole story, until he pointed it out. Maybe, after all, she too had something to apologize for (except the obvious).
Anyway, she was starting to just resign herself to the idea that they would probably never talk. A part of her was happy of that. He was still out of her life, so everything was fine.
Except for the fact that, well… it wasn't.
"What do you want?" House asked, and Cuddy realized she had been staring at his leg for a few seconds now. She moved her gaze to his face.
He wasn't looking at her. Cuddy had noticed he never looked at her.
"I would like you to take this case" she said softly.
"Why? I said there's no case"
"I know the mom, she was my patient in Pittsburgh, and she's not some irrational parent. If she thinks something is wrong with her daughter, then it's very likely that she's right" she explained.
House didn't say anything.
"It was me… I told her to come here… to meet you" she continued tentatively.
That was when he finally looked at her, genuinely surprised.
Not only had she made his name to a patient, but she had also come here, in his office, and sat next to him like she had made so many other times in the past.
He wondered if this could possibly be his chance to actually talk to her. After all, he never really apologized for what he had done to her. Not that she ever gave him the opportunity. But what if she was now?
Although he wasn't really enthusiastic about the case (he was still pretty sure there was no case), he agreed to take it.
"Thank you" she said with a smile, handing him the blue folder.
Then, she got up and left, while he paged his fellows and started reading carefully through the file.
The differential didn't really highlight anything. Given the age of the patient, the generic symptoms, and House's strong belief that it was all in her mom's mind, he just ended up ordering some blood tests and an echography.
He was sitting alone in the DDx room, trying to figure out if something had slipped, when once again he saw Cuddy's head peeking out from behind the door.
"You really do seem concerned about this baby" he commented, as she entered the room and took a seat on a chair across the table.
He could actually understand why. Turns out the mom was a single middle-aged woman who managed to have this baby after four failed attempts with IVF (he had done his research). Cuddy probably sympathized a lot with this case.
"Did you find anything?" she asked, completely ignoring his comment.
"I ordered a few tests. I'll let you know if something comes up" he replied.
Cuddy, however, didn't leave. She just sat there, staring at her own hands on the table.
"Rachel told me you brought her to the OR gallery last week" she said.
House couldn't understand from her voice if she was going to scold him, or if she was trying to initiate a conversation, so he opted for a neutral reply.
"She insisted. I thought there was nothing wrong with that"
"I know" she said smiling "You would let her watch a filthy pirate cartoon when she was three, I'm not surprised you let her witness a surgery at seven"
I used to think you would let her drive your bike at twelve, she wanted to add, but she didn't.
House didn't know if he was more astonished for the fact that she wasn't mad or for the fact that she was actually mentioning the pirate cartoon, one of the memories from their happy times. Maybe she didn't regret everything, after all. Maybe those things she said to him in Wilson's office didn't reflect her actual thoughts, maybe it was just her blowing off some steam, like he had done with his car. Except for the fact that what she did was not illegal and it couldn't potentially result in four dead people.
He looked at her. To him, Cuddy was always beautiful, but when she smiled like that, she was simply perfect. She could lit up a room, with that smile. He couldn't help cracking a smile too.
"Does she… does she still like pirates?" he asked tentatively.
"Not really. She grew out of it a few months after we left Princeton. After that we had a short cowboy phase, then a princesses phase, and then we were hit by the Frozen-Mania. When we moved back here she insisted on having her room painted in blue, so she could have her own ice castle" she answered, her smile turning into a huge grin at the nice memories.
"I think she mentioned it" he said, a hint of pride in his voice "isn't it the movie with the two sisters, Elsa and… Hannah?..."
"Anna, yeah"
"Yeah, she told me she and her best friend dressed up as them on Halloween. Your daughter talks a lot, by the way"
"I know!" Cuddy said, giggling "and what… what else did she tell you?"
"Among other things, I believe at some point she mentioned a boyfriend and a Valentine's day gift" he replied, subconsciously leaning on the table to get closer to her.
"Oh my God, she told you about Charlie?!" she was laughing now "That was a funny situation! When Rachel came home with that necklace on Valentine's day I actually had to call the boy's mom, you know, just to make sure she was aware of any missing jewel, and it actually turns out she received it as a gift for a magazine subscription, and his son took it to give it to my daughter!"
House burst into laughter as well. It looked like they found a topic that didn't make them fight or insult each other, but that actually made them feel at ease.
They kept talking about Rachel and the afternoon she spent at PPTH for a while, exchanging anecdotes on the little girl.
House hadn't felt so happy in years. Cuddy's laughter alone was a melody for his ears, but it was the fact that they were talking and sharing things that made his heart swell like he didn't think it was possible anymore. Plus, he was learning new things about Rachel, like the fact that she liked math and won a spelling competition in first grade. His memories of her were different, for years he had remembered her like the toddler who chewed on toys or ate with the wrong end of the spoon, but he had to recognize she had turned out to be an extremely bright kid.
"So, you never told her what I… you know, the fact that I…" he said at some point, finding himself incapable of pronouncing those final words.
"No, I didn't" she interrupted him, understanding what he was referring to "she was too young to understand anyway"
House thought this was the perfect moment to apologize. The topic had come up, and they both had enough endorphins in their blood from the hearty laugh they just shared, so he was going to go for it, when out of the corner of his eye he saw his team approaching the room.
"She has pneumonia. What's the plan now?" Chase asked, involuntarily putting an end to House and Cuddy's interaction.
As soon as the team started the differential, Cuddy went back to her office.
However, less than one hour later, the baby's mom knocked at her door in tears. Apparently, the diagnostics team had told her that her daughter, Kyla, had leukemia and they wanted to start her on chemo.
Cuddy took a deep breath, before promising her that she was going to speak to Dr. House personally, to make sure he made the right call. He walked in her office about five minutes after she paged him, while the mom had gone back to the pediatric ward.
"Ms Green says you want to start her three-month-old daughter on chemo. " Cuddy said, while House took a seat across her desk.
"Well, the kid has leukemia, so I don't really see other options" he replied matter-of-factly.
"How sure is it that she has leukemia?" she asked.
"About 80%"
Cuddy shook her head. "That's not enough"
"With her symptoms and her blood test results, it's what fits best. I can do a bone marrow biopsy if you prefer" he said, clearly challenging her. They both knew a biopsy in this case was almost as risky as chemo.
"It could be something else. It could be autoimmune, or genetic…"
House stood up.
"Great idea, I will go test her for all the hundreds of genetic diseases, thanks Cuddy" he retorted ironically.
"House. That baby is three months old. Chemo is insanely risky" she said calmly.
"Do you have a better idea?"
"No, but…"
"Then shut up and let me do my job" he sharply cut her off, and stormed out of her office.
He could understand that she didn't trust him on a personal level, but he wouldn't let that get in the way of his patient's care. He was still a doctor, and a damn good one, and she had to trust his medical judgement, even when the patient was someone she knew and cared about.
He was in the middle of the clinic when suddenly the truth behind his own thoughts hit him, and he froze.
It was me… I told her to come here… to meet you.
House suddenly remembered the words she had pronounced earlier. She did trust his medical opinion, she did trust him as a doctor, she did think he was the baby's best chance. The point was that she cared about these people, she saw herself in these people. She was concerned for them.
And she was a doctor too.
It took him great strength, and a few minutes of careful consideration, but eventually he walked back to her office. Maybe, just for this once, he could trust her.
"If I run more tests, and bring the chances of leukemia from 80% to 85%, will you let me start her on chemo?" he asked, after opening the door without knocking.
It took a few seconds for Cuddy to fully acknowledge his words.
He didn't formally need her approval to start this treatment, but he was respecting her counter-argument anyway, like he actually cared for her professional opinion.
That, for her, meant a lot.
She nodded, still astonished, and he left.
The team spent the night running every kind of test, trying to find a proof that the baby actually had leukemia, but when House arrived at the hospital the morning after, he found out that everything had been useless: the new tests actually decreased the chances of leukemia instead of increasing them. However, they also highlighted new symptoms, such as the fact that the patient had type one diabetes.
He was in the middle of the new differential when he heard Cuddy's distinctive steps behind him.
"News?" she asked "is it leukemia?"
"No" House simply said, shaking his head slightly.
Hearing that, Cuddy sat on one of the chairs around the table, took the patient's file and began reading through it.
"It could be cystic fibrosis" she heard Adams say, followed by House's negative feedback, but she wasn't really listening. A small detail had caught her attention.
"House" Cuddy said, looking up from the folder and interrupting the conversation "the baby's body temperature before the pneumonia was low"
House frowned. He had noticed that too, but it wasn't that low so he didn't really think it could be relevant to the diagnosis. Some people just had a lower body temperature, it couldn't be considered a symptom.
Right now, however, he put it into perspective.
"The patient has low body temperature" he repeated slowly, but he wasn't talking to the whole team, just to Cuddy. His eyes were now fixed on hers.
For the first time in years, they were really looking at each other, their gazes tied together by invisible chains.
"The patient has low body temperature, and type one diabetes" House said once more, while an idea started creeping in his mind.
"She also has an evident bone marrow dysfunction, digestive problems and a history of infections" Cuddy continued for him, her eyes never leaving his.
It was House who broke the eye contact first.
"Test her pancreas" he said to his fellows, who were now exchanging quizzical looks.
Then he addressed Cuddy again.
"This is Shwachman-Diamond syndrome" he said with a smirk.
She nodded, smirking back.
House stood outside the patient's room, watching Cuddy while she explained the diagnosis to the baby's mom.
He forgot too often what an amazing doctor she actually was. It was one of the first qualities he had noticed in her, back at university. She was this stunning girl with an amazing body, plump lips, firm breasts, big ass, but it was full of girls like that. What made Lisa Cuddy special to him was her brain, her ability to challenge him, how stimulating she was during a conversation.
She wasn't only the most beautiful woman he knew, she was also the smartest.
And we'd actually make a great team, he thought.
He saw her walking out of the room, leaving mom and daughter alone.
"I told her we'll notify her as soon as the genetic test confirms your diagnosis, but that we are pretty sure of it" she explained with a smile.
Cuddy had smiled so often to him in these past two days, that he wouldn't be surprised if he suddenly woke up panting in his bed.
"By the way, thanks for taking the case" she added.
"My boss didn't leave me many other options" House replied, and winked at her.
He regretted it instantly. Winking was against one of the rules.
He mentally got ready for the biggest scolding of his life, but after a few moments he realized she hadn't even noticed. The expression on her face had barely changed. He could still read gratefulness in her eyes, and something else too, that he couldn't quite define.
"I'd better get back to my… administrative duties" she said, walking past him towards the elevators.
These had been two weird days.
Although neither her nor House had tried to talk about their real problems, they talked, and it felt unusually normal.
Cuddy thought about what happened in her office the day before. Once, when they were dating, they had fought for something like that, because he had lied to her to get her approval, and it took days for him to apologize. Yesterday, instead, he had decided to listen to her even though it wasn't strictly necessary.
He would have been right anyway. Although the diagnosis of leukemia was wrong, chemo was the only treatment available, together with bone marrow transplant, against the complications that Shwachman-Diamond syndrome involved.
But he had voluntarily decided to respect her opinion anyway.
Plus, we make a very good team, she thought.
Neither of them had any idea of what was going on.
What House knew was that the following week, it was Cuddy herself that brought a new case to the team, and when it was time to get her approval for a nerve biopsy, he felt confident in asking for it himself. She seemed fine with that.
What Cuddy knew was that, some days later, she saw House and Wilson having lunch together, and it didn't feel wrong at all, nor she felt unwanted, when she sat down at their table and joined the conversation about the new weird janitor on the third floor.
What both of them knew was that, although they still had some important issues to discuss, wherever they were headed it seemed like a nice place.