A/N: for the past few weeks, I have been debating whether or not to update this story, post this chapter, take the story down entirely, etc, etc, etc... So I am posting this against my own better judgement.

I am thankful for everyone who has followed, favorited, recommended, took time out to write a review or pm. I never expected so may of you would actually like this. I really appreciate each and every one of you.

Warning: This is not a perfect story. Characters in this story are flawed, devious and very much out of twilight character.

I write for fun, and I want to keep having fun writing.

Heads up: sexy times ahead. Be kind in your reviews, plz.

"The transition from dog to god is only a revolution away." (The gospel of Loki)

...

"Say it... Out loud..." He breathed against her neck.

"Werewolf..."

His bitter laughter pierced her chest.

"Don't be silly. I'm not a werewolf, Bella!" He scoffed unconvincingly.

Edward was very still. Waiting for her to say something. She never did. Bella silently pushed his body away from hers, turned, frowning, and climbed into the car. Is that it? Isn't she going to say something? His eyebrows tied in a knot. Something was wrong. He could smell it, feel it in the air around him, taste it in the back of his throat. But still, she had said nothing. She hadn't pressed for him to go on. Instead she'd chosen to ignore it. Something is wrong!

Bella couldn't quite pin point what she was feeling. He was lying. Deflecting. She knew it, but she was too tired to argue. Her bones ached. It had been such a long day, she was too exhausted to argue. She watched as he trotted around the car to the driver's seat. Even doing mundane things he looked otherworldly. The air around him seemed to fizz with energy. He didn't appear to be tired. He never looked tired. He'd wore his hair down. His aftershave filled the cabin of the vehicle as he climbed in. Her heart skipped a beat as he flexed his biceps pulling his seatbelt on. Putting the car in gear he stole her hand and pressed it against his thigh as he drove. She could feel the hot, molten energy from his muscle flowing into her, infecting her. Her fingers curled involuntarily and her fingernails dug into his leg. He mumbled something. It sounded like a prayer in a foreign language. She felt sleepy then... Her eyes struggled to stay open. She knew she needed to stay awake, but try as she might, her lids felt too heavy, it was harder to concentrate. He's done something to me... A last horrifying thought before everything went dark.

Edward knew he shouldn't have done it. The moment the words came out of his mouth he regretted them, but she just looked so tired and upset, better to let her rest. He debated with himself wether to take her back to the cabin or not. Give her another day to... What exactly? You can't leave her. This is it! A battle of sorts raged in his brain. A certainty forged in the same fire that he'd been created in. He could never leave her. He'd promised to tell her the truth and he'd broken that promise. Shame ate away at his heart. Would she forgive him in the morning? Not if he left her again, he was sure of it.

Deciding at last, he drove the pick-up to his place. Long minutes passed as he watched her sleep in the seat beside him. She leaned on him. Her rhythmic breaths soothing him. Her body warm and limp against his. Her long brown locks sprawled on his chest. She shivered and mumbled his name in her sleep. His heart beat faster then. As she whispered sweetly against his chest, her warm breath just on top of his tattoo. Just as if she knew it was there. Calling her. Ink burned his skin. Carefully he gathered her tiny form to him, exited the car and carried her upstairs, placing her in his bed. Home! The monster was ferocious. He locked the door tightly behind them. He slowly removed her shoes and covered her with a blanket. Only then did the ink on his chest finally stop hurting him. The moonlight filtered through the window, enhancing her beautiful face. He had an urge to lick it, but he knew that was just the moon reveling in his pain. He sat on the couch. Watching over her.

"Edward..." She whispered in her dreams as she turned and tossed on his bed. "Please, Edward. I need you..." Her small voice taunting him. He wanted her. He hungered for her. His fingers twitched. His hands burned. Fire consumed him. He grabbed the furniture for support. The wood creaked under his fingers. This small wounded girl would be his undoing. And he wanted to revel in her blood. The need both tantalized and disgusted him. He wanted to bathe in her blood, drink from her naked form, penetrate her, claim her body, defile her in a never-ending blissful frenzy, an infinite violent thrust. Even her scent made his mouth water. And he was so disgusted with his bloody thoughts, he howled in pain before he could control it.

"Where am I?" Startled, Bella blinked as she sat up. The room was dark, except for a single ray of moonlight. Had she heard an animal? Her head hurt, and she felt dizzy. She could smell Edward's aftershave. Something inside her seemed to click and fall into place. Her back pulsed in pain.

"Safe." A whisper. She blinked again, trying to find his form in the darkness. His voice was deeper and huskier than usual. Her heart drummed away in a crescendo.

"What is happening?" She tried to get up, but ended up just stumbling forward in the darkness. Her body crashed into a wall of hard warm muscles. She tried to step back but his hands kept her pinned against him. "Did I fall asleep?" Terror made her look up, two green orbs shone back at her in the dark. She couldn't look away. Every inch of his hard arousal pressed into her center. His scent tantalizing her brain. Drawing her in.

"You need to rest, Bella. We'll talk in the morning, I promise."

"Aren't you going to sleep?" Her hand had a volition of its own and snaked up his chest to touch his stubbled jaw. As her eyes adjusted to the dark, she could read the pain splattered on his face as he pressed his cheek to her hand. "Come to bed, Edward." She whispered against his chest. He didn't move but she felt the full force of his raging vitality. Debating. Considering. Rejecting. Wanting. "I'll feel safer... I want... I trust you."

"You really shouldn't have said that." He warned in a long hiss. He pushed her away and she fell on the bed, letting out a sob. Rejection. Fear. Frustration. She felt the bed dip with his weight. Strong arms pulled her close. Warm skin burned hers. He was naked. Nimble fingers pulled on the knots that kept her dress in place. Sizzling lips greedily tasted her neck. His tongue swirled on her skin. She moaned as he finally ripped her dress off. He stopped, pulled himself up and forced her to look at him. "Is this what you want? You want a monster to consume you." His voice was so harsh, she almost didn't recognize it. "You want a fast hard fuck on my bed. You want me to get you off, turn you up, ignite you." His hand cupped her sex. He felt her soaked thong and almost lost it. "Fuck..." He muttered lustfully. "Is that what you want? A good lay and we both move on." He pushed away and sat farther away from her. He pulled his hair, disgusted with himself, the buried his face in his hands. His seams undoing, one by one. "I could break you in less than a second." He sobbed.

She moved closer to him, ran her fingers through his soft locks, his neck, his shoulders, pulled him into a hug and let him drown his sobs on her skin. She felt his electrifying rage subside, his lust wan as he seemed to regain control over his basic urges. When he calmed down he looked up at her. A series of emotions changed his face. Frustration. Guilt. Embarrassment. Shame. She smiled at him. Her hand cupped his cheek again. "Shhhh..." She pulled him down to lie on the bed. He embraced her and pulled her close. "Sleep, now." She whispered gently on his chest. She closed her eyes when she felt his breathing become steady.

...

Bella woke up with the first rays of sunlight. Once again, she woke fully rested. No nightmares, no memories. No dizziness, no nausea. She pulled herself up gently. Edward's large tanned arm still clasping her waist. Under her, he slept. She looked at his naked form. His robust body took up most of the mattress. Even in his sleep, that powerful body promised a world of hurt. He was fit and flawless. Bella strained to look at the dark ink adorning his breast plate. It was black circle with a wolf's head howling at the sky. The design was an intricate labyrinth of lines crisscrossing to form the wolf's head. She'd seen those kinds of patterns before. They seemed like knots, her mind cast back to a mythology elective she'd taken on her freshman year. The wolf depicted was ferocious. It's teeth menacing an invisible enemy. Around the black circle there was script she couldn't read. For some reason she thought of vikings. "Runes?" She whispered just as Edward's grip tightened around her waist. She looked up to see him staring back at her, cocking an eyebrow.

"Morning, love." He pulled her up. Placed a chaste kiss on her forehead. Bella sighed and rested her head on his chest. "We should go pick up Alice, grab some breakfast..."

"You're deflecting again." Bella bit her lip. Her fingertip traced the circle of runes around the wolf. He said nothing. She felt his strange energy rise. "You said..." She tried to choose her words carefully. "Help me understand..." He pulled her up so she was facing his green eyes. Her whole body blushed. He was completely naked under her and she could feel his arousal pressing on her. His green eyes trying to pierce through her skin. The electricity flowing from him and possessing her. "Were you lying last night?" She bit her lip again. His fingers dug into her arms as he held her up.

"I didn't lie. I am not a werewolf!" There was contempt in his voice when he said the last word. Disgust. He softened his grip and let her adjust her weight on top of him. Having her so close and yet so far, was torture. He felt raw need to be inside her. "I'm not a shapeshifter. I don't transform into a wolf or a half human beast." His lips brushed her cheek as he spoke. He wanted to lick that cheek.

"What does it say?" Her fingertips grazed the thin sticks around the circle. He felt every touch like a thunderbolt in his heart. What was this woman doing to him? He was losing this war, fast.

"No mercy, only violence." He smelled her fear. She was horrified. He didn't blame her. With all the scars in her body, he knew she assumed the worst from any man... And much more from a man who'd have such an angry tattoo, his curse. It was after all, a curse, wasn't it? One from which he'd tried to hide, but she had found him in the end.

"What?" Her voice trembled. She thought of him. Blood dripping from his hands. Her blood. His knife. Had she died? Maybe she was dead. Maybe... Green eyes shone again and she felt herself relax. Green eyes, not his.

"I would never hurt you, Bella." He pressed his lips to hers. She kissed him. Warm electricity filled her as she let him deepen the kiss. He moaned. She let him spin them around, so that he was on top, so dangerously close to where she needed him to be. His hands fisted the sheet around her. He pulled himself up and she could see him tremble, almost in tears. Feverish skin covered hers. All she could breathe was his scent: sweat, sea, forest, sex. Her tongue hungered for his sweet taste. "I want you... Please..." He begged.

He felt it more clearly. Hooks and chains around his heart. Pulling, tearing, igniting. But there was no moon. Bella was his moon now. The frenzy was rising up his spine. He was about to lose all control. And he didn't want to scare her. His demon was about to take over. He reached down and ripped her thong off. She smelled of sex. Molten chocolate filled peaches. And he desperately needed to taste them. No woman had ever made him lose his sanity like this. Women were usually an after thought, he enjoyed their attention but never let anyone get too close. Women were drawn to him. Ever since that blasted night... Maybe even before then. After all, it was like he was designed to draw them in, feed on their lust, let loose his own. But Bella invaded every fiber of his being. He knew what it meant. Being so in tune with her own needs. He wanted to deny it. Keep her safe from his destruction and chaos. But the monster inside him had different ideas. There was no controlling it. She was the only one for him. His own special brand of heroin. He needed her in order to survive.

"Not until you tell me..." She whispered. She could feel herself drown in his infecting lust. She wouldn't hold out much longer. She couldn't. Something bound her to him. An invisible chain linking her heart to his. She had crossed the mirror into wonderland, and couldn't escape this bond. It's like everything else fades...

"I'm... " he inched closer to her entrance. His hand cupped her sex, she was warm and moist. She pulsed with desire on his hand. He fought the instinct to push his fingers inside her warmth. He groaned. "Fuck..." A thousand dreams danced before his eyes. He needed those warm milky legs around his waist soon, needed to lick the small pink nipples, dig his fingers into the flesh on her hips, bite down on her tasty neck, take possession, mark her somehow. Mine! He was lost. He released her but she only inched closer, her legs inviting him. Liquid warmth pressed against his tip. He exhaled. "Please..." He swallowed, trying to gain some composure. "Don't make me say it... I'm a..." But it was too late. "Ulfheddin..." He confessed ashamed of his own name. She raised her hips and in one swift motion he was inside her. He felt every wall around his animal self melt away. Every knot keeping him in control unbinding. Let loose the warrior. The big bad wolf.

Bella watched the transformation in awe. One minute Edward seemed on the verge of tears and raw need, the other he seemed to become feral in his desire. His eyes shone in a darker hue, the features of his face more outlined, his hair flew around him in uncanny angles, his muscles seemed more defined, and his tattoo burned red hot like a fresh ion brand on his skin. She felt the wild frenzy penetrate every fiber of her being. Gravity pulling her towards him. She couldn't tell were she ended and he began. Their sex was frantic and ferocious. She let her hands wander and roam his body. She needed to touch him everywhere. She needed him to touch her everywhere. She'd never enjoyed intimacy with anyone, much less with him. But with Edward it was like a natural wild dance she'd only just remembered. It was easy to touch and be touched, feel and be felt. It was like being two halves of the same person. Soon she felt her orgasm building. He tensed inside her.

"Come with me, my mate." He howled before biting down on her neck. It didn't hurt but she knew he'd leave a mark. It wasn't like him biting her for pain. More like Edward wanting to share himself with her. She cried out her pleasure as she felt him reach his inside her. He collapsed on top of her with a grunt. His tattoo burned her skin just were he'd bitten her on her neck. He howled much like a wolf again and then cursed in a language she didn't understand.

...

"What does it mean? The word you said? Ul.. Ulf..." She asked later when they were soaking in his tub. She sat between his legs, her back against his chest. Her scars didn't hurt. Edward tried not to look at the bite marks and cigarette burns that marred her pale skin, he'd have to do something about her wounds soon.

"Ulfheddin." He hated saying it out-loud. As if saying it would make it more real. "It's really an old story, in the old days, Odin bestowed gifts to warriors that proved their valor in battle."

"Odin? Like in norse mythology." She felt him nod and kiss her shoulder. "That is nonsense!"

"Those men became something else, Odin's special warriors. Their strength allowed them to perform feats no other man could, they channelled animal spirits and traits. They suffered from blood lust and rage and uncontrollable darkness. It's like being consumed by a toxic anger that never goes away. Unbridled passion." He kissed her neck, nuzzled her ear.

"You really mean you, not 'they', don't you." He nodded again. "How is that possible?" So many questions filled her brain.

"Some of the warriors were believed to be werewolves, because they channeled wolf spirits and wore wolf pelts instead of armor."

"Ulf... That means wolf?" Her voice trembled. Predator. He might not change into one, but he still reminded her of a wolf.

"Yes, love." He spun her around and kissed her. Bella's mind was racing with more questions.

"Were you always this?" She asked when he broke the kiss.

"I was born with... a predisposition, you could say... A genetic flaw in my DNA. But I was only cursed four years ago." His voice was bitter.

"Cursed?" She asked in disbelief. How could he say he was cursed? She was witness to the beauty of his transformation. One minute he'd been Edward begging to touch her, the next he'd been a fierce warrior leading her to bliss.

"This is a curse, Bella. Don't mistake it for that superhero bullshit. I'm an insatiable monster. All I ever want to do is feast on the blood of my enemies. Obliterate them from existence." He kissed her violently then, letting his teeth graze her lips. "When I'm with you all I want to do is fuck you, lick you, bite you, eat you, over and over and over... There's a never ending frenzy, an infinite hunger." He licked her from cheek to breast. She moaned but pushed away. He groaned at the loss of contact. "I'm stronger and faster than any other man. I heal faster. I'm more agile. And there's a demon wolf mingled in my veins, infecting every good deed I try to do, he's full of vengeance and violence, and he's always hungry for more. I'm the big bad wolf, Bella. Fear me." He was transforming again, right before her eyes. Edward but not Edward. An ancient warrior emerging. His wolf self? Her heart skipped a beat. He heard it and smirked.

"You are talking nonsense. Why are you here? In this town." It made no sense to her. If what he was saying was true, why stay in this small coastal town?

"That's a story for another day." He pulled her back into his embrace.

"Is Alice like you?" He just shook his head. "Jasper?" He shook his head again. "But he deferred to you last night, hell, he exposed his neck as if you..."

"Alice and Jasper are... Different. Yes, you do have a great spidey sense, little fairy. But different as Jasper might be, I'm still the alpha in this pack." He kissed her once more.

"Little fairy?" Bella pouted. "Just under an hour ago you were claiming to be my mate."

"Wolves mate for life, love." He smiled and winked.

"Shouldn't you have opened with that before luring me to your bed?" She cocked her eyebrow. Pushed away again. "I might want my own free will."

"Luring you? You were practically begging me to claim you... To make you mine." He smirked. Bella flushed with anger. He felt the tingling energy in his heart. The hook dragging him towards her. He became very serious. Is she changing too? "Come here, Bella, let me love you." He reached for her. Melted away her defenses with a long searing kiss.