Chapter 7: Going To Bedlam In Belfast

"Last time on Total Drama World Tour. The contestants had their individual abilities on climbing, fighting and skating tested on three big bad challenges in Washington D.C., the capital of Canada's crazy down south cousin and with some dumb luck, brutal aggression and a surprising lack of care for old historic artifacts of the Smithsonian…all teams wound up in an unprecedented three way tie. To settle the score, each team had to prank a Tea Party politician, which resulted in a series of unpleasant massacres that almost got us all jailed. Lucky it didn't, I mean, I would not do well in jail. I'm too handsome to be in there. Anyway, in the end, Team Victory somehow managed to win and Team CIRRRRH's resident b/bleep/ch, Tyler, wound up getting the boot. Who will go down this time on this week's issue of Total…Drama…Woooooooorld Tooooouuuuur!"

In the economy section of the plane, two of Team Chris' team members were sleeping. Noah and Owen were sleeping next to each other. Owen was farting in his sleep and Noah was wearing a gas mask. Another contestant was waiting patiently by the entrance, expecting the return of the final member of Team Chris. When Izzy leaped back inside, Alejandro went over to her with an expecting expression.

"Izzy, did you get me what I asked for?" Alejandro asked.

"Sure." Izzy replied.

The crazy girl reached into her cleavage and extracted a large file labeled "Bridgette", which she handed to Alejandro.

"How do you do that?" Alejandro asked, surprised.

Suddenly, Izzy's expression switched to a grim one.

"Don't ever ask about that." Izzy ordered menacingly.

"OK." Alejandro replied, scared.

"Anyway, breaking into Chris' room and stealing his contestant files wasn't too hard." Izzy said. "I browsed through Bridgette's a bit and it's pretty precise, it has everything important she's ever since she joined the show."

"Great." Alejandro said.

"I also browsed through yours…Alejandro Serafino Nicéforo Onofre Burromuerto." Izzy said teasingly.

Upon seeing Alejandro's face turn absolutely red when his full name was called out, Izzy burst into a hysterical laughing fit and Alejandro growled at her, which did not in anyway stop her mocking laughter. Finally, Alejandro decided to ignore her and just sat down to read through Bridgette's file.

"You know what, guys?" DJ asked his teammates, rhetorically.

"What?"

"I think some people are just lucky." DJ said.

After saying that, DJ began to pour some ice cream onto his ice cream cone. After winning the previous challenge, Team Victory had the luck to have found another secret room…one that had a make your own sundae/ice cream/frozen yogurt/banana split supreme bar.

"…And we are some of those people." DJ finished.

Bridgette sat next to Lindsay in a nearby table. Both of them were enjoying sundaes and talking idly about girl things while DJ got his new ice cream cone. Then he sat down next to them and joined the chit-chat.

Outside the room, Team Amazon looked at them in envy.

"Look at that." Cody groaned. "They have chocolate sundaes."

"…And frozen yogurt." Courtney groaned.

"…And so much actual food." Gwen groaned as well. "Not anything that even resembles Chef brand slop is in that room. It's all delicious food and goodness."

"So what?" Heather scowled, looking away from the scene. "So they have actual delicious food, but we don't need that. We can live without it because we're the best."

"Yeah, you're right." The rest of Team Amazon agreed.

"Hey guys!" Bridgette exclaimed. "What are you doing out there just watching? Come join us!"

"Oh yeah!" All Team Amazon exclaimed as they entered the frozen treat room.

Heather stared in bewilderment.

"Hey! You can't join them for ice cream! You're betraying the team!" Heather yelled.

"Screw you, Heather!" Gwen yelled back.

"Well, I'm not going to betray Team Amazon. Unlike you, I do have loyalty towards my team."

"We don't give a f/bleep/k!" Gwen yelled back.

Heather growled and stormed off.

(Bathroom confessional)

Heather – /Fuming/ I can't believe they would just join up with the other team! You can't fraternize with another team, you just can't! What is wrong with these people, it's like they don't even care about the competition! If you make friends with the other team, it's harder to beat them! Even if you were friends with them before being split into teams, you don't go buddy-buddy with them while you're competing! I hate these guys!

The ice cream party was interrupted when the contestants felt the plane begin to descend and then heard Chef speak over the intercom.

"Alright, maggots!" He exclaimed. "We're touchin' down in ten minutes so Chris wants you in the cargo deck right now!"

In five minutes, all the contestants were in said cargo deck, awaiting the host's arrival. Chris entered the cargo deck in his usual outfit and addressed the teenagers.

"Hey kids." He said. "Normally I'd give you some sort of tricky speech before pulling this lever and dropping you off the plane through a trapdoor, but I think today I'll skip that."

Even though Chris had pretty much just warned them about what he was about to do, the contestants reacted too slowly and weren't able to move away from the obviously marked trapdoor they were standing on; so when Chris pulled the drop lever, they all fell in through the hole opened beneath their feet and plummeted to the ground below.

The fall wasn't too high, since the plane was flying pretty low but it still dealt the contestants some pain. When they got up and recomposed themselves, they noticed they were standing in a clover field in the middle of some open countryside near a forest and next to a road that stretched for miles without reaching anything other than the forest. The forest itself was not very visible since the sun was beginning to set on the horizon and everything was only lit by a dim orange light. It was on this barren, desolated road that Chef landed the plane.

In less than two minutes, they were faced with their host Chris McClean and like always he was dressed in a costume that had semblance with the country they were in. However, instead of the usual effect of giving the contestants a hint as to where they were, this time the costume nearly gave them all a laughter induced heart attack.

Chris was dressed like a leprechaun…With a ginger haired wig and everything.

"What?" Chris bellowed. "What?"

"The costume…dude…so funny!" Owen cackled.

Chris looked down at himself in surprise and then turned over to Chef.

"You told me this was a traditional Irish outfit!" Chris yelled.

"Yo fault for trustin' me, fool!" Chef exclaimed while he too had a laughing fit.

"OK! Laugh it up!" Chris said, angry and bitter.

Twenty five minutes later the laughter still hadn't wind down a single bit. Forty five minutes after those twenty five minutes it had begun to dwindle and an extra thirty minutes later it had come to an almost complete stop.

"I hate you people so much." Chris groaned bitterly.

"I'm guessing from the ginger dwarf costume that we're in Ireland." Gwen said, still giggling.

"Yes…Two days by foot outside of Belfast to be more specific." Chris said, still bitter.

"That's technically Northern Ireland." Noah pointed out.

"Don't really care." Chris said. "Now for the good part. Your first challenge is to make your way toBelfast. Whichever team makes it there whole will win the first round. You'll have to make your way across that dense forest and then through a long stretch of open Irish countryside to make it there. Good luck."

Immediately, Chef swooped down on the Total Drama Chopper and Chris hopped aboard before any of the contestants could ask any questions. Realizing that the first challenge had just started, the contestants bolted into the forest.

"OK, so why are we in the chopper?" Manuel asked.

The three producers: Damian Hellburn, Manuel Alberti and Carter Denham were up in the air. All three of them were in the production helicopter, a large Black Hawk helicopter, hovering above the Irish forest the first challenge was currently taking place on. Damian and Manny were sitting on some back-facing seats that let them look straight at six monitors that were showing the contestants' progress (two monitors for each team); while Carter was piloting the helicopter and was as always quiet and focused.

"Because we're inNorthern Ireland." Damian answered. "And after what happened inRussia, I am not touching down in any country where I have enemies."

"Enemies?" Manny asked.

"The IRA." Damian said. "Thanks to the automatic fuel reloader Carter installed, we have enough fuel for two days, which is how long it's gonna take the contestants to get toBelfast. After that, we land in the airport and wait out a couple of hours until the last challenge is finished and we can leave."

"Don't you think they're gonna attack in those couple of hours?" Manny asked.

"They're Irish. They're so drunk, their delayed response time won't let them figure out we've landed until hours after we've left."

"Well, we've lost 'em." Chef groaned.

Chris and Chef were looking down at the forest, looking for the contestants but were unable to spot them because darkness had pretty much covered the entirety of the forest after the sun set in the horizon and a very dim moon had come out.

"I told ya that lettin' 'em loose in a forest when it's almost night time without any flashlights or maps was a bad idea, Chris." Chef said.

"Well, you certainly didn't try to convince me too well, did you now?" Chris said, still looking down at the forest with binoculars, desperate to find the kids.

"I did! I even made a PowerPoint presentation about it!" Chef exclaimed. "But you still didn't listen!"

"Shut up, Lavernius!" Chris groaned.

"You know Chris; it's a real bad idea to make fun of the guy who could knock you off this chopper with one hand." Chef threatened.

"Um…I meant, I'm sorry, Chef." Chris apologized nervously.

"Major Chef." Chef insisted.

"Yes…of course, Major, sir." Chris choked out in nervousness.

"We've been wandering around for hours." Heather groaned. "Courtney, do you have any clue where we're going?"

Heather hugged her arms close to herself, trying to keep in the warmth. In retrospect, she regretted coming to a world tour show with clothes that consisted primarily of tube tops and short shorts.

"Courtney?"

No response.

"Oh crap."

"I told those idiots not get too apart from each other but no!" Courtney groaned to herself. "By the time I get out of these woods they better have already made it to Bedlam because if I lose due to their ineptitude I am so going to slaughter them!"

She suddenly felt a cold breeze rush past her cheeks, which elicited a brief but annoying goosebump across her body.

"Crap, now it's getting cold! I hate those guys."

"This sucks." Gwen groaned. "Could be worse, could be having to listen to Heather complain about how her shoes are getting muddy."

"Gotta stay brave. Gotta stay brave. Gotta stay brave. Gotta stay brave." Cody muttered to himself over and over again.

Then he felt a slight breeze slide across his hand.

"AAAAAAH!" He screamed at a frequency of 2.0 Hz as he ran aimlessly in terror.

However, Team Amazon was not the only one that had accidentally split itself up.

"I blame Izzy for this." Noah groaned as he tried to find a way out of the thick, dark woods. "If she hadn't tried to talk to that damn owl we probably could have stuck together."

He paused briefly when he heard some scuttling in the nearby bushes.

"Oh, don't panic. The only dangerous animal that can be found in the Northern Irish forests at this time of year is the Irish Screaming Fox and he always alerts his pray with a shrill, almost terrified-sounding scream of 2.0 Hz of frequency." He muttered to himself.

"AAAAAAAH!" Noah heard nearby.

"Oh Jesus, what frequency was that?"

"AAAAAAAH!"

"2.0." Noah muttered.

Realization dawned.

"Irish Screaming Fox!" Noah yelled. "AAAAAAH!"

The bookwork bolted into the forest, trying to get away from the screams that he heard nearby.

"OK Owen, don't get scared. I mean, this is a harmless forest. Nothing bad ever happens in the forest. Except in horror movies like the onesDuncanshowed you; but that stuff's not real." Owen muttered, trying to comfort himself. "Except the ones that he said were based on true stories; but he said that they couldn't hurt me because they didn't take place anywhere near close to home, they took place in…Ireland."

Owen stopped dead on his tracks.

"OK Owen, don't move a muscle. Insane chainsaw killers can't see you if you don't move."

"AAAAAAH!" Owen heard.

"AAAAAAH!" Owen replied as he ran away in terror.

"This is boring." Izzy moaned as she swung from branch to branch, doing pirouettes in mid-air as she did so.

"AAAAAH!"

"AAAAAH!"

"AAAAAH!"

"Ooh, screaming contest! Awesome!" Izzy exclaimed. "AAAAAH! AAAAAH! AAAAAH!"

"It's just an empty forest, just an empty forest, an empty forest, empty forest, forest, forest, forest." Bridgette choked out as she quaked in fear, scuttling across the forest and trying to find some degree of mental stability as she faced her greatest fear once again.

"AAAAAH! AAAAAH! AAAAAH!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Bridgette screamed in absolute terror, bolting forward through the forest like the rest of the cast began to do after hearing the horrendous scream that she had just unleashed.

Across the forest, every last contestant, no matter how brave began to scream and run in terror upon hearing Bridgette's scream of panic. Even Chris and Chef heard it up in their helicopter.

"I think that's bad news." Chris said.

"Yeah." Chef agreed. "Maybe we should intervene."

"OK, turn on the searchlight, I'll tell them to calm down over the megaphone." Chris told him.

Chef turned on the chopper's searchlight and began to move it across the forest, trying to spot some of the contestants. Chris pulled out the megaphone and spoke through it.

"Children, calm down. It's me, Chris! There's nothing to fear. Just relax." He said.

However, due to a malfunction in the megaphone and the interference generated by the chopper's noise, it came out more like:

"Grrraaarrrgh! Raaaawwwwwrrggggghhhhh!"

Coupled with the unnatural, fast moving searchlight, this meant only one thing for the contestants.

"MONSTER!" They all yelled in unison.

The scream reached Chris and Chef.

"Ooops." Chris exclaimed.

The contestants dashed across the forest, going around aimlessly until they stumbled upon a brief savior…a house. An old, rather large house in the middle of the forest. Normally the contestants would question the presence of such an out of place house in the middle of the forest, but at the time they preferred anything to the dark, scary forest with the "monster" in it. So they all rushed inside when they saw it.

However, since they arrived at the different moments and through different places, none of them saw each other go in and since all went to different places inside it, none ran into each other. At least, not initially.

"Safe at last." Noah groaned.

Being the last one to arrive at the house, he was the only one who didn't get to be in a room on his own.

"Right you are, Noah." Izzy exclaimed.

"Aaah! Izzy! You startled me!" Noah groaned, almost whispering.

"Why are you whispering?" Izzy asked.

"Because I don't want to alert whatever's out there that I'm in here." Noah said. "Now let's find a candle to get a little light."

"We could just turn on the lights." Izzy suggested.

"You could if you wanted to alert every beast out there that there's fresh food in here." Noah replied, sarcastically. "Besides, I doubt there's power inside this old shack."

"Oh, OK."

The two began to rummage through the small living room they were in. They found the usual things you'd find in a living room: a couple of sofas, an armchair, a couch, a fireplace, a coffee table, the usual. However, Noah stumbled upon something a little more uncommon on one of the corners of the living room.

An Irish flag spread out and hung between two tall metal poles. The flag had the words "Óglaigh nah Éireann" and the initials "RIRA" spray painted across it.

"RIRA." Noah muttered. "That's the initials for the Real Irish Rep…Oh God."

"Hey Noah, I found a candle in this closet. Let me light it." Izzy said.

"Izzy, come over here." Noah said, slightly scared.

"Sure." Izzy said, carrying the candle. "What's that?"

"That's a Real Irish Republican Army flag." Noah said. "We have to get out of here."

"Why?"

"The RIRA is a subdivision of the IRA, which is a terrorist group that wants to makeIrelandindependent from theUK." Noah explained.

Izzy remained unfazed.

"By blowing stuff up."

Izzy still did not react.

"Which means they're violent."

Izzy still did not change.

"Which means if they catch us here they'll freaking kill us!"

"Oh."

"Now put down that candle and…Izzy, that's not a candle."

"No?"

"No, that's a stick of dynamite. A lit stick of dynamite."

"Oh…"

"Please throw it across the room and then dodge out of the way with me."

"OK."

"Sure."

Doing as she was told, Izzy promptly hurled the almost ready to explode stick of dynamite across the room and it landed next to the open door of the closet from which Izzy had extracted it. Only when the light of the dynamite hit the closet did Noah see that it was jam packed with all kinds of explosives.

"F/bleep/ you, Izzy." Noah groaned.

"You already did."

"What?"

"In the cargo hold, that night."

"What are you…"

BOOM.

"What was that?" Chris yelled in terror.

"That house over there blew up!" Chef exclaimed.

The two were hovering relatively close to the large house in the middle of the forest when it exploded, which gave them a clear sight to see the contestants fly across the air after the explosion.

"CRAP!" Chris yelled. "Chef, follow them! If any of them get seriously hurt we could get sued!"

"Right on, boss." Chef said as he flew forward.

"What was that?" Damian asked.

"Looks like a huge explosion." Manny replied.

"No shit Sherlock, but I mean, what exploded?" Damian said.

"No clue. Carter, get closer." Alberti ordered.

Carter pushed the Black Hawk forward until they were hovering above the now burning wreck where the explosion had come from-

"Looks like a house." Damian said.

"Looked like a house." Alberti corrected.

Nearby, another helicopter was also nearing the explosion site. A helicopter carrying five armed Irish men in combat clothing.

"Our base!" One of the men in the helicopter said. "Somebody blew it up!"

"How did this happen?" One asked.

"Look over there!" Another guy said, pointing at the distance.

The Irishmen looked over to where their companion was pointing and noticed a Black Hawk helicopter hovering over the flaming remains.

"That's a British standard helicopter!" The pilot yelled. "Those bastards blew up our base!"

"Let's get 'em!" Another man yelled.

One of the IRA men extracted a rocket launcher from the back of the helicopter and took aim at the Black Hawk. He fired.

The rocket zoomed past the darkness and missed the Black Hawk by centimeters, blowing up in the distance instead.

"What the hell was that?" Alberti yelled.

"IRA Chopper!" Damian yelled, spotting the other helicopter.

"How do you know it's IRA?"

"Who else could it be?"

"Let's get outta here!"

Light slowly crept into her eyelids. By pointillism, bit by bit of the sunbeams slid between her lidded eyes and forced her to slowly open them. She blinked a couple of times and suddenly realized that she was shaking, or rather that somebody was shaking her.

A tall, dark, masculine frame appeared in front of her, out of focus but slowly becoming clearer until she realized it was Alejandro. When she fully opened her eyes, the Team CIRRRRH contestant stopped shaking Bridgette.

"Bridgette, are you OK?" He asked with concern.

"Ugh…what happened?"

"I'm not sure. I was resting in a house in the woods, then I heard an explosion and the next thing I know is that I woke up here." Alejandro answered.

Bridgette looked around herself and noticed that she and Alejandro were still in the forest, albeit in a far less dense part of it, since they were in a clearing at the bottom of a relatively tall hill. She hoisted herself up with Alejandro's help.

"Any idea where this is?" Bridgette asked.

"Not really, but I've been awake for a couples of hours now while I was waiting for you to wake up and I noticed that the sun has been rising from over there, so that's the East. SinceBelfastis to the West of here, we should be going that way." Alejandro said.

"Oh, OK. Thanks Alejandro." Bridgette said, relieved. "Thanks for not leaving me behind."

"I could never do that." Alejandro said, faking indignation. "Whoever would do that to such a beautiful lady is a monstrous beast."

"Well, tell that to Geoff. One time I fell asleep at a party and he forgot me there when he left." Bridgette groaned. "I had to walk halfway acrossTorontoto get back home."

"He did that?" Alejandro asked, faking shock, since he already knew about the incident. "Though, it was surely a one time lapse in judgment."

"No actually, it was the third time he' done it…and he did it three times more after that." Bridgette said.

"Well…no matter. We have to get going, we can't allow ourselves to remain behind or Chris might leave us. He's capable of that." Alejandro said.

"Yeah." Bridgette giggled.

(Bathroom confessional)

Bridgette – After what happened in Russia, I had my doubts about Alejandro, but while we were trekking through the woods in Belfast I just couldn't…well, I realized that I was wrong about him. He really is nice.

Alejandro-/Snickers sinisterly/ All according to plan.

"This is bad." Courtney groaned.

The brunette had awoken five minutes prior and had spent those whole five minutes thinking of a way out of her predicament. She and her teammate Gwen were on top of a large rock that was balanced on a small stone pillar, but that was slowly tipping over to one side as part of the pillar it was posed on was breaking off. Gwen was unconscious and Courtney had not even tired to wake her up, since she was more concerned with the possibility of falling off the rock.

"Crap." Courtney groaned. "OK, maybe if I take off Gwen's belt I can use it as a sort of rope that I can tie to that low branch over there and then maybe swing the both of us across that relatively large trench and leap to safety on that…AAAAH!"

Courtney screamed as the chunk of the pillar gave away and the rock plummeted downwards, dragging both her and Gwen with it. The girls dropped in freefall until they hit a river below, right where it picked up into the rapids. As Courtney came out to surface, she saw that Gwen was still floating unconscious and, luckily, face up.

"Goddamnit Gwen, how can you still be out cold?" Courtney yelled.

The brunette realized that the goth was not waking up anytime soon and with a groan of discontent she began to swim towards her. Since they were on rapids and Gwen was out of commission, Courtney did not have a hard time catching up with her. She wrapped her arm around the other girl's waist and made sure to hold her vertically so that her head remained above water. Courtney had remained relatively unaware of the cold until then, but now that she was staying still and allowing the current to carry her without moving, she realized just how freezing cold the water was.

Courtney held Gwen tighter for warmth and tried to think of a way to get out of the river. She was thankful that the particular section of the river they were in was deep, since if it had been shallow she could have really bruised and cut herself; however, she also knew that deep section in rivers are brief, so she needed to figure out a way to get to land quickly.

The sides of the river were too high and covered in sharp rocks, so she couldn't just try that and there were no low branches to grab onto. Courtney began to breathe frantically when she realized that there was no way out and that she shallow waters would be coming soon and with them so would the jagged rocks and the immobilizing pain.

Then, it hit. Her leg ran past a lagged rock and she felt the point dig into her skin and give her a cut. She yelped in pain and held the injury with her free hand. She could tell it was not a deep cut, but it would still hurt for a long time. She also knew that it would only get worse from there on in. Another rock hit her, this time on the side of her stomach, but it did not cut, since it wasn't sharp. Then, the rocks simply began to appear everywhere, hitting her everywhere. The legs, the arms, the back, the front; she was being tossed around by the rocks and she was not sure how much longer she could take it when her back slammed into a particularly large rock and she remained there.

Courtney looked behind herself and realized that she'd hit the curve of the river and were against a large boulder. Courtney hoisted Gwen upwards and placed her on the top of the rock, she then climbed up after her. The brunette coughed and wheezed, spitting out all the water that she had swallowed. When she realized that Gwen had still to wake up, the brunette angrily slammed her fist down on her chest, which promptly awakened the goth.

"Uggh! What the? Courtney, what happened? Why are we all wet?" Gwen asked.

"Explosion…huge rock…saved you from drowning…"

Then Courtney blacked out.

"OK, if I can let go from here and land on that other branch down there, it'll become a drop of just ten meters. Not too much." Noah said.

After the explosion, Noah had awakened on the top of an evergreen tree. He had looked down from the top and had seen Owen and Izzy unconscious on the ground…thirty meters below himself. After three hours of work he had managed to go down most of the way, but found that he had no more branches to go down on and his only choice was leaping down and hoping to land on Owen's soft belly, which would lessen the blow.

"OK, I have to swing myself on top of Owen. I'm gonna need absolute precision." He thought. "OK, start swinging. Now, letting go at once, at twice, at…"

Surely enough, the branch broke and Noah fell through the air, screaming. He missed Owen by a long shot but instead fell on top of Izzy's chest, falling into her cleavage and disappearing between her breasts.

The sensation of something hitting her chest awoke Izzy, who immediately remembered what had happened and giggled. Her mad giggles woke up Owen, who was conditioned by the knowledge that when Izzy giggled near him, something fun was about to happen.

"Ooh, what's up, Izzy?" Owen asked.

"Nothing much, we just flew across the air because of an explosion I accidentally set off and we've been unconscious for the past say five or six hours." Izzy said.

"Cool." Owen replied.

"Wanna make our way toBelfastso we can win the challenge?" Izzy asked.

"Sure." Owen replied.

Meanwhile, elsewhere…

"What the hell happened?" Noah asked.

He had fallen of a tree branch and had hit Izzy, but then he saw that he was falling down an even bigger height on a different forest. He got off the ground and looked around to spot several strange plants that he'd never seen before and that he was sure didn't exist, since many of them were multicolored and stripe-patterned, hell, some even had shapes that were physically impossible to attain.

Suddenly, he heard something scuttle across the bushes and then leap out in front of him. Much to his surprise, it was a giant, human-sized white rabbit wearing a waistcoat and carrying a large golden pocket watch.

"Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be too late! I shall be too late for a most important date!" The white rabbit muttered to himself as he ran.

"Oh, I have a bad feeling about this." Noah sighed as he began to follow the white rabbit, hoping to find some answers."

Courtney slowly opened her eyes slightly. Light crawled in so Courtney's eyes began to flutter and drift from open to closed for a while until she finally managed to hold them open, if only slightly. That was when she first realized that she was pressed against somebody else and that a head was resting against the crook of her chin, a head that was nudging her slightly.

"Duncan…we'll have a quickie in a few minutes, now let me sleep." Courtney muttered almost reflexively.

"What?" Gwen asked, surprised and accidentally dropping Courtney.

As soon as Courtney hit the floor did she realize that she wasn't curdled into bed with her punk boyfriend as she had assumed she was when she briefly awoke, but rather she was (or had been until seconds before) being carried through an Irish forest by her team's resident goth girl.

"I'm sorry, Courtney?" Gwen asked, helping the other girl up by the hand. "Are you OK?"

"What on earth happened?" Courtney asked, dusting herself off.

"You saved me from drowning and then you passed out, so I've been carrying you so we could get out of the woods." Gwen said. "…And, thanks for, you know, saving my life."

"Oh, no problem." Courtney said, relatively awkwardly. "You're my teammate after all, I'm sure you'd have done the same."

"I'm not so sure about that." Gwen muttered to herself, unheard by the brunette.

"OK Gwen, let's move on." Courtney said. "Are you sure we were heading in the right direction?"

"You saidBelfastwas to the north, so I just went towards the left from where the sun was rising, which was the east." Gwen explained.

"Very well, then let's keep going." Courtney said.

(Bathroom confessional)

Gwen – I gotta admit, since Courtney saved my life I really feel guilty. I was actually convinced that if she ever got the chance she'd leave me to die, but not only did she save me, she risked her own life to do so. I feel really guilty about all the things I've said about her and about the whole Duncan thing…not that I like Duncan, no, no, no, just that…you know, my friendship with him caused trouble in their relationship, that stuff, not that I like him because I don't, I don't, I really…don't. I'm gonna stop talking now.

"Izzy! Wait up!" Owen yelled.

The morbidly obese teenager was running as fast as his chubby legs could take him to catch up with his psychotic girlfriend, who was swinging from tree to tree by some thick vines and was roughly five hundred meters ahead of him.

"But Owen! Waiting is no fun! Life is about swinging through trees!" Izzy screamed fiercely as she kept on swingin'.

The crazy girl flew across the air, performing several flips and tricks that defied the tyrannical laws of the cold-hearted physics dictator Isaac Newton. At one point she flew across a leafy outcrop of a tall oak tree, accidentally coating herself in leaves, small vines, bark, twigs and some bird feathers from old nests. Hitting the outcrop made her lose her balance and caused her to plummet off the tree.

Below, five armed Irish men were riding on a jeep.

"OK, we might have lost those British agent bastards who blew up our base, but we'll find 'em boys." Their leader, a so called O'Brien said in a thick Belfast accent. "Nobody can hide from the IRA."

Suddenly, Izzy fell on top of the car's hood, unharmed but covered in forest residue.

"'Ello, guv'nor." She greeted the IRA members crazily.

"AAAAH!" The IRA men screamed in terror.

"British forest monster!" Another member, a so called McNally screamed.

"The legend is true!" Yet another member, a so called Malloy screamed in a thick Dublin accent.

"Everybody jump out!" A fourth member, a so called Donahue screamed.

And so they did. The IRA members leaped out of the jeep to their left and immediately wished they had jumped out to the right, since there was a large ravine to the left of them. The IRA members rolled down a steep hill and disappeared into a mess of thorn bushes.

Izzy leaped off the jeep before shaking the forest residue off herself the same way a dog dries up, while the jeep continued its course, gradually slowing down and disappearing after crashing through a bunch of bushes.

"Izzy! Izzy! Wait!" Owen screeched as he arrived next to the crazy girl, sweating and panting like he was about to suffer a heart attack (which wasn't all that unlikely).

"Fine Owen, we'll walk for a while…but then it's swingin' time again!" Izzy exclaimed.

"Too…tired…to argue…need…relaxation ham." Owen panted.

The fat guy reached into his shorts and extracted a large ham, which he promptly devoured in one go.

"OK, I feel better now." He said.

In the depths of Izzy's cleavage, Noah found himself irritated.

"For the seventeenth time, I do not want to hear the Tale of the Walrus and the Carpenter!" Noah yelled at the two identical "things" in front of him.

The two "things" looked human, but their bodies were almost sphere-like with thin limbs that shouldn't be physically able to hold up their fat, round bodies. They had no necks and their heads looked like ovals that were glued to their sphere bodies. They were both wearing very tall yellow pants with striped shirts and striped beanie hats.

"The Walrus and the Carpenter." One said.

"Were walking close at hand." The other said.

"They wept like anything to see." The other said.

"Such quantities of sand." The other said.

"'If this were only cleared away'" The other said.

"They said, 'it would be grand'!" The other said.

"I don't care." Noah muttered.

"'If seven maids with seven mops'" One said.

"'Swept it for half a year'." The other said.

"'Do you suppose', The Walrus said." The other said.

"'That they could get it clear?'." The other said.

"'I doubt it', said The Carpenter." The other said.

"And shed a bitter tear." The other said.

"There is no God." Noah muttered bitterly as he palmed his face in anguish.

"…And then we just let Jorge back out into the park, where it climbed up a tree and vanished back into its own little world." Alejandro said.

"That is so cute." Bridgette said.

Bridgette and Alejandro had continued their trek through the woods and during the walk, they regaled her with stories about each other. Knowing her particular tastes, Alejandro focused mostly on things related to animals and his supposed love for them, telling her not entirely true stories about his many pets and his work in a local animal shelter.

"Sometimes when I see a squirrel, I think that it might be Jorge and hope that he'll come over so we can have fun again, like back in the days when I was helping to heal his injured paw." Alejandro said, feigning joy. "…But I'm sure he's forgotten me by now."

"Don't say that, I'm sure Jorge remembers you and that he's looking for you too." Bridgette said, placing her hands on Alejandro's shoulders reassuringly.

"Thanks Bridgette, I hope you're right." He said, adding a touch of sadness and hope to his words, which made Bridgette blush.

"I never knew you cared so much about animals." Bridgette said, not noticing her own blush.

"I do." Alejandro said.

Suddenly, a rustling in the leaves made the pair stop and stare as a deer burst out of the nearby brush and began to eat grass off a small patch, not noticing either of them. Bridgette stared at the deer in awe and Alejandro saw a brief, perfect window of opportunity. He began to make a strange animal call, which made the deer raise its head and look at them curiously.

"What are you doing?" Bridgette asked, nervous that the deer might be frightened off.

"Wait. Look." Alejandro said before he kept on making the animal call.

The deer, responding positively to Alejandro's animal call, began to slowly approach the pair, something that amazed Bridgette. In a minute, the deer was next to the two teens. Bridgette slowly reached out and stroked the deer's neck. Carefully, she began to pet the deer and her nervous face wounded down to one of utter relaxation and admiration.

However, that all went to hell when a scream came from the distance and the deer was scared off just before five men came rolling down the steep ravine ahead of the pair, covered in forest residue and thorns. Though initially startled by the appearance of the five men, Bridgette and Alejandro soon approached them.

"Are you OK?" Bridgette asked them as they got up.

"Oh, we are me darling." O'Brien said. "And you two'll be coming with us."

"What?" Bridgette asked.

"You see, we're members of an important revolutionary group and there are three vicious British agents and a forest monster looking for us around here, so we need some hostages." O'Brien explained. "You will be playin' that part."

"If you try to even harm her a single bit, I'll slam you into the next life, amigo." Alejandro threatened, stepping in front of Bridgette with his fists raised up.

Suddenly, all five men pulled out guns. Flynn pulled an Uzi out from his coat, McNally and Malloy pulled out AKs, Donahue pulled out a Lupara and O'Brien pulled out a Beretta 94, which he pointed at Alejandro's head.

"Don't play hero, kid." O'Brien said. "Malloy."

Before Alejandro could react, Malloy slammed the butt of his rifle into the side of Alejandro's head, knocking him out. Bridgette screamed in horror and bolted to Alejandro's side, holding up his unconscious body.

"Alright girlie, don't ya move. Tis'll only hurt fer a second." Malloy said.

Then Malloy struck her on the side of the head with his rifle and then darkness.

"How much longer do you think it is until we get out of the woods?" Gwen asked.

"No clue, Gwen." Courtney said, rather bitterly. "I'm not familiar enough with the Irish forestland to be able to make an educated guess."

"If only we could find a car, or a bike or anything." Gwen groaned.

"It's not exactly like cars just crash through the bushes when you ask them too." Courtney muttered.

Then, both girls heard something unusual to hear in the middle of a forest. A sudden call of "'ello guv'nor" followed by a scream and a call of "British forest monster! The legend is true! Everybody jump out!". Immediately afterwards, a Warthog jeep crashed through the nearby bushes and came to a halt next to Gwen and Courtney.

"Huh." Gwen muttered. "That's oddly convenient. Do you know how to drive cross country?"

"Gwen, I've driven across forests to get injured campers to hospitals under severe times conditions many times before…in my days as a CIT." Courtney said as she got into the jeep. "This is going to be very easy."

"How many times did you have to drive injured campers through a forest?" Gwen asked, also getting in.

"As many times as bratty little campers pissed me off and got what was coming to them." Courtney explained while she turned the key in the ignition and started the engine. "Now buckle up, we'll have to go very fast if we want to win."

Then, Courtney crashed down on the pedal and the car took off at high speed.

(Bathroom confessional)

Gwen – /Terrified/ I'll never ride in the same car with Courtney ever again.

Courtney-/Smiling nostalgically with fondness/ One of the things that Duncan used to do and that I initially hated was his horridly fast driving, but with time I realized just how thrilling it was to drive absurdly fast. Of course I wouldn't do it on a street; that would be against the law, but whenever Duncan and I went to the beach in his car, we'd take a while to race across the dunes at a hundred miles an hour. /Sighs happily/ Nothing quite as thrilling as that.

"OK gentlemen, as soon as the IRA dickwads come around, we carry out attack plan Omega K-2." Damian instructed.

"Wait, is Omega K-2 setting bombs on their trail and blowing them up when they go over them?" Manny asked.

"No, that's Theta K-2. Omega K-2 is jumping out of the bushes and shooting the living fuck out of them." Damian explained.

"Oh, OK."

The three executive producers had set themselves up behind a set of bushes on a small hill near the IRA's parked helicopter and were awaiting the arrival of their foes to eliminate them as soon as they approached. They had been there for almost twelve hours and were getting tired, but since they were used to lengthy stakeouts to eliminate revolutionary targets, they could handle it.

"Quiero saber que me pasa. Te pregunto. ¿Qué me pasa? Y no sabes
Que contestarme, porque claro, de seguro te maree.
Con mis idas y vueltas, te cansé con mi cámara lenta
Y aunque trato, nunca puedo apurar mi decisión."

"What is that?" Damian asked, incredibly annoyed by the pop music that was blaring out of an unspecified location.

"My ringtone." Manny admitted, rather embarrassed.

"En el preciso momento, en que todo va cambiando para mí.
En ese instante, te aseguro que alguna señal te di
Pero no me escuchaste, tal vez sin intención de tu parte.
Puede ser te un poco débil el sonido de mi voz."

"Really? Spanish pop music is your ringtone?" Damian asked sarcastically.

"For your information it's Argentine pop music…and it's really good." Alberti replied.

"OK, just pick up the damn phone before that song drives me to suicide." Damian groaned.

Alberti did as he was told and reached for his phone.

"¡Oh! ¡Una mañana te veré llegar!
¡Y descubriré que yo, solo ya no estoy mejor!
¡Y, te pediré que me acompañes!
¡A donde en verdad no sé, dime que si, miénteme!
Podría ser que al final. ¡Rompiste el cristal en mí!
¡Podría pasar que me hagas hablar!
¡Yo creo que tienes el don de curar este mal!"

Alberti picked up his phone and answered.

"DMC Productions. Co-Founder and Executive Board Member Manuel Ignacio Esteban Rodriguez De Alberti speaking." Alberti answered.

"Hello, Mr. Alberti?" A shy voice asked on the other end of the line. "Could I speak with Mr. Hellburn?"

"May I ask who you are?" Alberti asked.

"Oh, of course, sir. I'm Parker Kovak, the woman you hired to manage and produce Total Drama Aftermath." Parker answered [1].

"Oh yeah, I remember you. Pale complexion, late-twenties, Eastern European features and a slight propensity for neurotic behavior." Alberti said.

"Yes, that…that would be me." Parker answered.

"Sure, I'll pass you over to Damian." Alberti said.

The producer passed the phone over to his co-worker and this one answered.

"Hello."

"Hello, Mr. Hellburn. This is Parker Kovak, the producer of Total Drama Aftermath." She said. "I have something to tell you. It's a rather important piece of bad news."

Damian was about to ask what the news were, but before he could he heard the noise of people approaching through the brush. People who were speaking in distinctly Northern Irish accents.

"I'll have to call you back later, Miss Kovak." Damian said. "I have more pressing matters to attend to right now. I'll call soon."

"But sir, I…"

Before Parker could continue, Damian hung up and tossed the phone over to Alberti.

"Gentlemen, be prepared." Damian said.

The three producers ducked behind the bushes and they looked through the bushes down the hill towards the parked helicopter on the clearing. From their vantage point they had a slight height advantage to shoot down at the Irish separatists without being easily shot themselves. They also had a pretty clear hearing of what they talked about.

"OK, we'll get on the chopper and head over to the rails. There, we'll board the munitions train and re-direct it towards the drop point, where we offload the cargo and take it so our organization can re-start operations against the British government." O'Brien explained.

"What train was it?" Donahue asked.

"Belfast Freighter 36." Malloy answered.

"Do you think we'll have enough time to offload the cargo?" Flynn asked.

"Yes, they aren't expecting the train inBelfastuntil tomorrow morning." O'Brien answered. "We'll have more than enough time."

"What do we do about the hostages?" McNally asked.

"We'll just dump them off the side of the train once we take it over." O'Brien answered. "They'll be hurt but I doubt they'll get killed."

The five separatists came into view. Malloy and Flynn were carrying two large, heavy-looking sacks and O'Brien, McNally and Donahue were carrying AKs. As soon as they were within range, Damian uttered the secret codeword that gave his associates the signal to fire.

"Lesfuckingkillem!" He screamed.

Immediately, all three producers burst out of the bushes and opened fire. The shots tore towards the IRA members and though most of them missed, Carter easily landed five shots on Donahue's chest, killing him immediately. The rest began to run away.

"Boss, where do we go?" Malloy screamed.

"To the Warthog jeep, we can take the train from the side! Now, just run!" O'Brien screamed.

The IRA men ran and got a long distance between them and the producers before the producers could make it to the bottom of the hill to keep firing at them. As soon as they got to the bottom, Carter managed to put a single bullet in the back of McNally's head, killing him as well and Damian and Manuel both got to shoot Flynn in the ass. Unfortunately for the producers, the IRA men managed to hide themselves in the brush and the trees, getting away from them quickly.

"Damn! They got away!" Manuel yelled.

"Let's get back to the Black Hawk; we can get them from the air!" Damian instructed.

"In the forest?" Alberti asked.

"No, dumbfuck! Didn't you hear what they said? They'll try to take the freighter from their car! If we can catch up with that train, we'll catch up with those bastards and bring them down once and for all." Damian explained.

"OK."

The sun was beginning to set as the Belfast Freighter 36 departed from the station. It had made its final stop to re-fuel before it continued on an all-night trip straight toBelfast. It was during this pit stop that Izzy and Owen managed to get onboard the roof of the train. Owen had insisted that one of the cargo holds might have been better, but Izzy (being Izzy) simply ignored him and threw him on top the roof before somehow cartwheeling vertically up the train wall and onto the roof.

In order pass the time, Izzy suggested they play a round of a game she called "Extreme I Spy". Owen agreed, though he came to regret it almost immediately.

"OH GOD, WHY?" Owen screamed in terror. "HOLY MOTHER OFIRELAND, WHY-Y-Y?"

"Come on Owen, I spy with my little eye something that's green." Izzy repeated. "Don't make me let go of you."

Izzy repeated her clue about spying something green yet again while she held Owen upside down, holding him by the ankles and suspending him over the edge of the train. Owen screamed yet again just as he dodged an oncoming milestone that nearly hit his head as the train rushed past it.

"I DON'T KNOW! IS IT THE GRASS?" He asked, crying.

"Yes!"

Immediately, Izzy pulled Owen back up onto the roof, who immediately huddled himself and shrunk into a fetal position while he shook and sucked on his thumb.

"Oh, Big O is tired?" Izzy asked in a cutesy voice. "OK, we can go to bed early."

The redhead cuddled up with Owen and rested her head against his shoulder, letting the violent vibrations of his terrified form rock her to sleep.

(Bathroom confessional)

Owen – I really like Izzy, since she's very fun and stuff but sometimes when I hang out with her, I really get scared she might kill me. In fact, most of the time we hang out it ends with me hanging upside down from somewhere really tall or really fast. I didn't really notice that until now…

Back inside God knows where, Noah had been going into a near panic when he stumbled upon a very helpful creature.

"You know, I just about thought I was going to go as insane as Izzy when I found you." Noah said, relaxed. "Pass me the hookah."

The Caterpillar passed Noah one of the hookah's breathing tubes, from which Noah promptly took a drag of the strange smoke that he and the Caterpillar were smoking while sitting atop his mushroom. Needless to say, both were quite high.

"I…knOw….whAt…yOU…mEAn." The Caterpillar said, highlighting the vowels of each word and breathing out puffs of smoke shaped like those letters when he said them.

"Hey, how do you do that letter smoke thing?" Noah asked.

"It's…A…mEdical…disOrder." The Caterpillar answered.

"Oh, sorry."

The Caterpillar shrugged it off.

"Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be asking you directions." Noah remembered. "Do you know how I can get out of this kooky dimension?"

The Caterpillar put down his hookah tube.

"No." The Caterpillar spoke with aManchesteraccent now that he wasn't smoking. "But I'm sure my friendCheshiredoes. You'll find him in the woods down thatYellow Brick Road."

"Thanks, man." Noah said. "I'll go as soon as I come down. This is some powerful stuff."

Near the train tracks, a Warthog Jeep tore across the open Irish countryside, riding near the Belfast Freighter railways. Driving it was Flynn, sitting shotgun was O'Brien and on the back seat was Malloy. The latter two were armed with AKs and ready for bloodshed. On the open case trunk of the Jeep were two sacks, inside which were Alejandro and Bridgette.

"OK boys, we're going to take that train and we're going to drive it straight to Command so we can use the ammo and restart our independence campaign so that Donahue and McNally will not have died for nothing!" O'Brien howled, almost breaking down into tears.

"Boss, ya can't really blame yu'rself for McNally and Donahue's dea…" Malloy started.

"Don't say it, Malloy! Goddamnit, don't say it!" O'Brien yelled. "Let's just do this."

The tension in the Jeep was great, so Flynn tried to cut it.

"I wonder why they call this thing a 'Warthog Jeep'." Flynn commented.

"It's really called an M12 LRV Jeep. Warthog is just a nickname it got because M12 LRV is too hard to say in conversation." O'Brien answered.

"Yeah, but why Warthog? It doesn't look at all like a pig. It looks more like a puma." Flynn remarked.

"Flynn, what the hell is a puma?" O'Brien asked.

"Ya mean like the shoe company?" Malloy asked.

"No, like a puma. It's like a big cat, like a lion." Flynn answered.

"You're making that up." O'Brien said.

"I'm telling you, it's a real animal." Flynn said.

"Malloy, I want you to poison Flynn's next meal." O'Brien instructed.

"Yes, sir!" Malloy said, merrily.

"Now stop making up animals!" O'Brien yelled.

"I still think it looks nothing like a warthog." Flynn said.

"Look Flynn." O'Brien said. "The Jeep has two tow hooks at the front, which look like tusks. Now, what kind of animal has tusks?"

"A walrus." Flynn answered bitterly.

"Didn't I just tell you to stop making up animals?" O'Brien yelled.

"The train!" Malloy yelled, pointing towards the train, which was only slightly ahead of them.

After a few minutes, Flynn managed to even the Jeep with the train and held the car's position next to a ladder that climbed up to the roof of the train.

"Malloy, go in first. I'll follow you." O'Brien instructed.

Malloy nodded and carefully leapt onto the ladder at the side of a train car. With his AK hanging from his back by a strap, he began to climb up until he was on the roof. After Flynn made it to the top, O'Brien leaped onto the ladder as well and shouted to Flynn from it.

"OK Flynn, wait until we stop the train so you can get on board." O'Brien said.

"Yes sir."

"Oh, and make sure to keep the 'puma' on par with the train, OK?" O'Brien mocked.

Flynn laughed bitterly and sardonically at his boss before muttering a swear at him in Gaelic. O'Brien climbed up the short ladder, but stopped midway as he saw Malloy getting thrown off the train roof and across a great stretch of land into a nearby river, which carried him off because of its heavy current.

"What the?" O'Brien yelled.

Immediately, the RIRA squad leader climbed to the top of the train to see what had thrown Malloy of the same and was surprised to find only a small, redhead teen girl.

"OK girl, you're going to get out of my way or I'm going to get very mad." O'Brien threatened, holding up his AK.

Upon not hearing a response, O'Brien began to get tense and made the mistake of blinking. In the split second in which his lids were slammed hut to refresh his eyeballs, Izzy disappeared from his line of sight. Immediately, however, she appeared from behind when she sweep kicked O'Brien to the group before tearing the AK from its straps and throwing it off the train. O'Brien got on his feet, but was knocked down soon after when Izzy leaped into the air and bicycle kicked him six times; after which she hoisted him up onto her shoulders and after spinning around a couple of times, she threw him off the train and into the same river that she had previously thrown Malloy into.

When he noticed that his boss had been thrown into the river as well, Flynn did what any loyal follower would do and decided to hightail it out of there.

"I'm gone!" He shouted to himself as he began to speed away from the train. "The IRA didn't even pay well and in this economy I need a steady income. Anyway, I'm safe as long as I have these hostages."

Flynn looked through the rearview mirror to see the two sacks where Bridgette and Alejandro had previously been in were now empty and slumped over the back of the backseat.

"Ah, crap! Could this day get any worse?" He yelled.

At that point, a Black Hawk helicopter appeared behind him in the sky. The dark helicopter was plainly noticeable in contrast with the orange sunset sky.

"Hey asshole!" Damian shouted from the helicopter. "Here's a treat for ya! Carter, finish him! Goddamnit!"

Carter Denham emerged from a side of the helicopter, holding up a large rocket launcher and pointing it at Flynn's jeep. He fired a rocket and it went straight towards the Warthog.

"Oh shi…"

Then the Warthog Jeep blew up, killing Flynn immediately.

"Alright boys, a job well done." Damian said. "Let's head home."

"Damian, we're inIreland." Manuel pointed out.

"Well then let's get to a goddamn pub! I need some booze!" Damian exclaimed.

However, unbeknownst to the producers, they had a couple of stowaways on their chopper. Well, more like under their chopper than on, since Izzy had leaped onto the helicopter and held onto one of the landing braces with her right arm while holding up a sleeping Owen with her left hand. The chopper began to fly towardsBelfast, flying slightly lower and slower than before due to the extra weight.

On board one of the freighter train's cargo carts, Alejandro and Bridgette finally got some rest. Both the contestants were slumped over the large crates and sacks that were stacked on the cart and were breathing heavily, trying to catch their long lost breaths. Both of them had woken up inside the sacks on the back of the Warthog and when Alejandro noticed they were near a train, he used the spurs on his boots to rip open his sack and crawl out. He released Bridgette as well and when the IRA men were distracted with boarding the train they leaped onto the side of one of the open carts and climbed aboard.

"Jesus Christ!" Alejandro exclaimed.

A very shaken up Bridgette bolted for Alejandro and hugged onto him tightly while she began to cry.

"Bridgette, are you OK?" He asked, worried.

"Yes, I am. Thanks to you." Bridgette said, in tears. "You saved my life, Al. Those crooks were going to kill us and you defended me! I've never been so scared in my whole life!"

Alejandro stared down at the crying Bridgette, who was sobbing into his chest and grinned wickedly before smiling tenderly and hugging her.

"Don't worry Bridgette and you don't have to thank me. I only did what any gentleman would do. I couldn't let those terrorists hurt you." Alejandro said.

"You're so nice, Al." Bridgette sobbed.

"I only did what any good man would have done." Alejandro said.

Then, an infamous bell chime.

"What?"

"It's song time, kiddies! Chris yelled from his chopper.

Alejandro and Bridgette stared out of the open train cart and saw Chef and Chris flying low on their helicopter.

"It took us almost a whole day to find you, but now that we have we want a good solo song from you, Alejandro." Chris said through his megaphone. "…And it better be about all that heroic gentleman stuff you said just now. That's gonna be awesome if we put it on the show's soundtrack."

"Excuse me, we were having a tender moment here." Alejandro yelled.

"I don't hear singing!" Chris exclaimed.

(Bathroom confessional)

Alejandro-/Frustrated/ Chris has a clearly marked, annoying tendency to ruin everything and this annoying tendency becomes an infuriating one when what he ruins are my genius plans to get my victory.

A soft yet inspiring piano melody began to play and Alejandro stood tall and straight, looking at the sunset in the horizon with heroic determination as he began to sing with a dramatic tenor voice.

"When tyranny crushes, the freedom of many
I will be there.
When hatred clouds, the judgment of any.
I will be there.
When war has torn, the peace from the living.
I will be there."

Bridgette leaned over a nearby crate and stared at Alejandro, entranced. She was utterly charmed by his beautiful voice and by the heroics of his song, which she believed to be heartfelt and true due to what he'd done when faced with the IRA men. As the song went into the next stanza, it began to gain momentum.

"When anger reigns, over the foolish
I will be there.
When the dark has turned, reality boorish.
I will be there.
When evil has won and thinks that it's thriving.
I will be theeeeeeeere!"

The melody of the song changed to a much more up-tempo one, with a faster rhythm and on a higher key.

"When the wicked lurch and roam the land
I will chase them and drive them to sorroooow!
I will fight 'til the hour of victory's at hand
And evil won't live to see tomorrooooooow!
With bravery and courage inside my heart
I will cleanse my soul of temptatioooooon!
If we believe in truth and good from the start
We'll beat evil and reach salvatioooooooon!"

Then the tempo slowed down again and the melody switched once more to a softer, but more flowing one that gradually gained momentum.

"And the world, though poisoned inside
Is still good, as the dark will subside
And though evil, still seems to prevail
One brave man, will ensure it'll fail
As he fights, with his hand clutched to knife
Striving, to reach eternal glory!
Striviiiiiiiiiiiiing, to reach a saintly liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife!"

As Alejandro finished his climactic, Bridgette began to clap passionately.

"That was beautiful, Alejandro!" She cheered, moved and amazed.

"Meh, I've heard better." Chris said. "That song was obviously a rip off from 'The Impossible Dream' from the musical 'Man Of La Mancha' as performed in 1965 by Richard Kiley."

"You sure seem to know a lot 'bout musicals, Chris." Chef said, slyly.

"I'm not gay, OK?" Chris groaned. "You've made that joke for two seasons straight now and I'm starting to get sick."

"You're startin' to get sick of me doin' something straight for two seasons? Well Chris, that must mean you don't like straight things; so I'm guess you like…"

"Shut it!" Chris groaned.

Chef laughed mockingly as he flew the helicopter upwards, gaining height so as to better supervise the area to find the rest of the contestants.

"I still think it was brilliant and so honest. Maybe even humble." Bridgette said.

"Oh, don't flatter me, Bridgette." Alejandro said, feigning humility. "You are too kind, someday somebody might just take advantage of that."

"I'm not that naïve, Alejandro." Bridgette said. "I know when somebody's trying to use me."

"If you say so." Alejandro said, holding back a snicker. "Now, let's not think about bad people and manipulation. Let's just rest. The Ira psychos said this train will arrive inBelfasttomorrow morning, so we have time to wind down after this horrible situation."

Bridgette nodded and made herself comfortable on some sacks of what appeared to be gunpowder. Sensing she might be uncomfortable, Alejandro stepped up.

"Would you prefer to lie your head down on my chest? I wouldn't mind and I figure it's much more comfortable than those sacks." Alejandro offered.

"Are you sure it wouldn't be a bother?"

"It would be an honor."

(Bathroom confessional)

Bridgette – /Swooning and blushing/ He is such a gentleman. I've never met such a nice guy in my whole life. I mean, nobody's ever treated me with such kindness and respect without asking for anything in return before…/Her expression suddenly changes to a confused and saddened one/not even Geoff.

Alejandro – I've never met a girl so easy to charm and trick I my whole life. Not even Lindsay was that easy to charm, and she was pretty easy to charm. The whole "dumb blonde" thing must have some truth to it.

"Making oddly sarcastic remarks without being invited is very very rude." The Hatter said.

"Very rude indeed." The Hare added.

"I get it, everything is rude indeed." Noah groaned. "Sitting down, serving myself tea, throwing a plate at your face, everything."

Noah was sitting down on a large, gilded chair at the head of a table littered with tea cups, tea pots, tea plates and everything related to tea. The only thing not related to tea on the table was a clock, which had the number six at every dash in its face. Though technically even that was related to tea, since six o'clock is tea time.

There were two other figures sitting at the table. One was a large headed man with messy grey hair, who wore a fancy butt oddly-colored purple Victorian suit and an oversized hat with a tag that read "In this style 10/6". The other figure was giant hare dressed in a suit similar to the Hatter's but colored red instead of purple and wearing some strands of straw tied around its ears and forehead.

"Why is a raven like a writing desk?" The Hatter asked Noah spontaneously.

"Well…"

"CHANGE PLACES!" The Hatter screamed.

Immediately the Hare and the Hatter leaped off their seats and bolted around the table, knocking Noah off his chair and taking new positions in a few seconds before returning to their previous demeanor.

"I always find men fromManchesterto behave like women fromCornwall. It is curious." The Hatter said.

"I do agree, but I always found it more likely for men fromManchesterto behave like children fromSussex, who in turn behave as horses fromGloucesterand which are in demeanor very similar to rocking chairs fromSuffolk." The Hare said.

"Oh, how deliciously satirical!" The Hatter exclaimed.

"I know, I'm just dastardly, aren't I?" The Hare exclaimed.

"The damn grinning cat told me this was the way out. Well, figures it would happen for trusting the words of a grin without a cat." Noah muttered.

"Would you like some tea?" The Hare asked Noah, handing him a full cup of tea.

"Well, it would be nice." Noah said.

As Noah reached for the cup, the Hare pulled it away.

"Then let me pour you some." The Hare said as he pulled the up away.

The Hare picked up a tea pot and began to pour excess tea into the cup, causing the tea to spill over the sides of the cup and onto the table mantle.

"Why is a raven like a writing desk?" The Hatter asked Noah again.

"Because Edgar Allan Por wrote on both." Noah answered.

The Hare and the Hatter stopped their activities and just looked at him.

"Well, I personally didn't know the answer but that one is very good." The Hatter exclaimed. "The exit is down that road, you'll have to talk to the Queen of Hearts first, but I'm sure she'll let you out without any problems."

"Thanks." Noah said bitterly as he walked away.

He was certain by now that it wouldn't be as easy as the Hatter described.

Night fell over the Northern Irish countryside and the hard-working Irish people went out for drinks. Courtney and Gwen however, decided to make a pit stop and sleep for a couple of hours before continuing their journey, figuring that none of the contestants was going to be travelling during the night anyway,

The girls stopped their jeep on the side of the road and made a small fire with a fire making kit in the back of the car. Over the fire they cooked some of the packed canned meat rations they also found in the back of the car. While they ate, the girls shared some pleasant conversation.

"Other than being shallow and absolutely annoying, I find that Miley Cyrus also distracts proper young teens from more important things with her cheesy music." Courtney said.

"Courtney, I never thought I'd say this, but you're completely right." Gwen said.

Both girls started talking and tried to find some common ground, which turned out to be their dislike of mainstream culture, albeit for completely different reasons. Courtney hated it because she thought it was shallow and distracting, Gwen hated it because…well, she was a goth…duh. Do I really need to explain?

"I always figured she never even sings her own songs." Gwen said. "I bet she uses autotune or some of that stuff."

"Nah, her voice is real. She can sing well, too bad she sings all the superfluous Disney stuff." Courtney groaned. "Whatever happened to good music, the type that had a message about important, meaningful things?"

"Like what?" Gwen asked. "Nine Inch Nails?"

"No. Bands like Queen, which mixed beautiful music with meaningful lyrics about emotions, politics and humanity." Courtney answered.

"You like Queen?" Gwen asked, disbelieving.

"I didn't really care for them untilDuncanmade me listen to all his music." Courtney said. "I didn't like most of it, but Queen just struck a chord with me. Appropriately."

"SoDuncanintroduced you to a lot of new stuff, huh?" Gwen asked, curious.

"Yes." Courtney admitted, half begrudgingly. "I'm going to tell you something that I haven't really told anyone and I'm only telling you this because I'm pretty sure we're not being filmed right now so don't tell it to anyone else."

"Speak up, Court."

"Huh…I really have to thankDuncanfor a lot. I owe him a lot. He showed me a lot of stuff and really opened up my mind to new possibilities." Courtney said. "…And well, I really feel sorry for the way I treat him a lot of the time. You know, how I'm very jealous and overprotective. I just do it because I know that even though he's good, he's still a lecherous guy and I'm afraid he might leave me for somebody who's more…well, more like him. I really care for him and I don't want to lose him, but I always feel like he's going to just chase after some piece of tail and leave me when I'm not watching over him."

Gwen was simply stunned that Courtney. Miss "Distant and Emotionally Defensive" Courtney was actually being so honest with her. It made her feel sympathetic and at the same time very, very guilty.

"Look Courtney, I knowDuncan. I know him very well and I doubt he'd leave you like that." Gwen said. "He'd never leave you because you're…well, your uptight self; but he might leave you if you keep being so jealous and strict, so you should try to stop doing that. If you do, then you're golden. He'll be with you like a dog is with his owner."

"You think?"

"Yeah."

Courtney thought on it for a second and the smiled. Then she closed her eyes, sighed and looked at Gwen with seriousness and regret.

"Gwen, I'm sorry for how awfully I treated you last season." Courtney said.

Gwen was taken aback. The last thing she thought Courtney would ever do was apologize to her and the fact that she'd done it blew her mind.

(Bathroom confessional)

Gwen-/Shocked/ Courtney apologized to me. Courtney…apologized…to me. I just can't believe that happened. I guess she's really changing for the best, since the Courtney I thought I knew would have never apologized, much less to me. Maybe she's been replaced with one of those alien pod people. It actually seems more likely for that to happen than for Courtney to have apologized. Seriously, it's just mind blowing.

Courtney-/Looking down at her feet, almost shamefully/ Apologizing to Gwen was one of the hardest things I've ever done, but I had to do it. I was so cruel to her and I did it for no good reason. What I did was…/Speaking with effort/ Wrong.

"I know now that you'd never try to takeDuncanway from me. I didn't know you back then and I felt threatened, but now I do know you, at least a little bit, and you're definitely not the kind of girl who'd do that." Courtney said, clearly with effort. "I'm really sorry that I was so prejudiced. I really regret it."

Gwen's own guilt just kept on crashing down on her.

"Courtney, you don't have to apologize so much. It's OK." The goth replied. "I forgive you."

"Thank you." Courtney said.

The two girls sat in silence for a moment before Gwen spoke again.

"Courtney, have you ever felt something…not love, but just something…a very strange, very wrong emotion towards a person that you should feel anything for?" Gwen asked.

Then, Courtney's expression became pale, surprised and shamed.

"Gwen, I know what you're going to say and yes I know what you mean, but you can't do it because it's wrong." Courtney said. "I know you think you like it and you feel really attracted to them, especially when they're wearing low cut dresses and bikinis but you just can't because it's wrong. You have to keep down those strange thoughts and remember that you also feel the same way about guys and…"

"Courtney!" Gwen interrupted.

"What?"

"I wasn't talking about that at all. At all." Gwen said. "And if what you were talking about is what I think you were talking about, then please stop talking about it to me."

"Oh…" Courtney said, blushing in shame. "Just forget everything I just said."

"I'll try."

"Then…what is it that you were talking about?" Courtney said, trying to change the subject.

"Never mind." Gwen concluded.

"You could have given us better directions!" Heather yelled at Chris.

Outside a small pub on the outskirts ofBelfast, almost all the contestants angrily (or in some cases slightly irritated) gathered around Chris. All were present save for Noah.

"Well, I didn't think about it." Chris defended himself.

It was the late afternoon of the following day, approximately six o'clock. Most of the contestants had arrived toBelfastearlier that morning but spent hours looking for Chris and Chef, who hadn't given them directions. Luckily, most of the contestants could ask the locals for direction in reference to "a big, murderous looking black army man and a perhaps gay TV host riding around in a chopper".

"It was hard enough that we had to get here on our own, but we also had to find you in a whole city!" Heather yelled.

"How did you even get here?" Gwen asked.

"Long story." Cody said.

(Flashback)

"The only reason I'm letting you come with me is because you're on my team, you know." Heather said. "If it were up to me I'd kick your goods and leave you aching on the side of the damn road."

"Gee, thanks." Cody said, sarcastically.

Heather and Cody were walking down a deserted Irish country road, having just left the forest hours earlier and needing to find their way toBelfast. After almost half an hour of walking down the road, a car began to speed towards them.

"Great, let's hitchhike!" Cody said.

The two teens stood at the side of the road and made the hitchhiking signal to attract the driver's attention, but he merely drove past them. Though it seemed like they would have to walk again, an angry Heather came up with a solution. She faced the departing car and lifted up her top. Immediately, the car stopped. The two teens walked over to the car.

"Hey girl, want a ride?" The guy in the driver's seat said to Heather after she stepped in front of the open driver's window.

The guy was clearly a sleazy American tourist.

However, instead of accepting that ride, Heather simply punched the driver in the face, knocking him out. She opened the door and threw the unconscious man out before climbing inside and getting behind the wheel.

"Get in!" She told the stunned Cody, who promptly obeyed.

"Well, regardless of what kind of pain and humiliation you had to endure because I didn't want to give you an address, I think we're all ready to continue with the show." Chris said.

"But Noah isn't here." Owen complained.

"Where is the little pipsqueak?" Heather asked, bitterly.

At the back of the crowd, Izzy's breasts began to vibrate and shake violently (which went unnoticed by everybody, including Izzy herself). Suddenly, Noah erupted from within her cleavage and landed on the pavement wearing a jeweled crown, a purple cape and holding a ruby-topped scepter.

"Oh hey Noah!" Izzy exclaimed upon seeing her friend appear out of 'nowhere' and making everyone's attention turn to him. "Where have you been?"

"I have no idea." Noah replied. "…But wherever it was, I am now their king."

"Good, now that everybody is here we can go on." Chris said. "Since Noah was the last to arrive and he's from Team Chris, they won't participate in the final challenge."

"Does that mean one of them gets eliminated?" Asked a hopeful Courtney.

"Please be Alejandro. Please be Alejandro. Please be Alejandro." Heather muttered, also hopeful.

"Worried that I might charm you, querida?" Alejandro asked with ironic charm.

"Shut up." Heather snapped.

"No, none of them gets eliminated since this is a reward challenge." Chris said.

Team Chris cheered while Team Amazon groaned.

"Now, Chef please take Team Chris to the Jumbo Jet while I watch over Team Victory and Team Amazon in the second challenge." Chris instructed.

"OK Chris. You heard him! Move it, maggots!" Chef yelled at Team Chris, making the scatter off.

"Alright, let's go into the pub so I can explain the second challenge." Chris said.

"Why do we need to be inside a pub for the second challenge?" DJ asked.

"Glad you asked…"

"For the second challenge, children, you will engage in a traditional Irish activity…a drinking contest!" Chris exclaimed.

"What?"

The pub was empty save for Chris and the contestants, since it had been rented out for the show. It was a stereotypical Irish pub, with the bar, the wooden stools, chairs and tables, the paraphernalia signs, the dart board, the pool table and the decorative taps all where you'd expect them to be.

(Bathroom confessional)

Courtney – /Outraged/A drinking contest? Seriously? Is Chris aware of the existence of the word "law"? Because if he is he isn't showing it! I will not drink a single drop of alcohol until I am twenty-one, I made that clear toDuncan and I'll make it clear to Chris.

Gwen – I have nothing against getting wasted, my friends back home will tell you that…but to do it on TV, with my mom likely watching…She knows I drink every now and then, but there's a difference between knowing and seeing. I learnt that the hard way when in my eighth grade science frog dissection class.

DJ – I ain't gonna drink, even if it means I forfeit the challenge. My momma wouldn't approve and if my momma doesn't approve of somethin', then I am not doin' it.

Bridgette – I've never really drunk much. I mean, if had a little to drink at Geoff's parties but he respect me enough to let me stay mostly sober. So having to participate in a drinking contest is a little bit unnerving for me.

Heather – There are many challenges where I have been able to put my talents to good use, but Chris just gave me the victory on a silver platter. I can hold back any amount of any illegal drink, pill, powder, plant…/Cut to static, listing of illegal products goes on for twenty-five minutes flat/.

"I am not participating in a drinking contest!" Courtney yelled.

"Oh, don't worry, you squares." Chris said.

"Squares?" Gwen asked, holding back laughter. "I'm sorry, does this pub exist in a separate universe where it's always 1956?"

"Anyway…You won't be drinking actual alcohol." Chris said. "It's non-alcoholic beer with a special additive chemical that makes you dizzy for a few minutes like alcohol would so that we know when you've lost, but it's not real alcohol and it's not bad for your health."

"Really?" Bridgette, Courtney and Cody asked.

"Yeah."

"Well, that's a relief." Bridgette said.

(Cockpit confessional)

Chris – Actually, it was real beer. We just didn't tell them so. It's not like it's illegal anyway, the legal drinking age inIreland is 12.

The two teams sat at a large wooden table. At the far left side was Gwen, then to her right was Heather, then Courtney, then Cody, then DJ, then Lindsay and on the far right was Bridgette. Chef walked past the table, serving each teenager a tall mug of supposed non-alcoholic beer with a dizzying chemical additive (actually beer).

"Alright kids, here's how it's gonna go down." Chris said. "Each one of you is going to drink down these 'beers' as fast as you can and the one who manages to hold down the most will win. Clear?"

The contestants nodded.

"OK. Go!"

The contestants picked up their mugs and when Chris blew hi whistle, they begun to chug down. As soon as they were done with their first drinks, DJ hiccupped and fell backwards off his bench, absolutely drunk.

"Wow, I've never seen anyone with such low alcohol tolerance." Chris said.

"I thought you said this was non-alcoholic." Bridgette remarked.

"It's sort-of like alcohol." Chris said, nervous. "Anyway, looks like DJ is out. Which is surprising considering that he's so big. Seriously, you'd think somebody with such body mass would be able to hold out longer."

The rest of the contestants (save for Heather and Lindsay), who were not big on drinking, took the drink rather harshly and coughed heavily at the taste of the bitter beer.

Chef walked past the table and served the second round. This time around, the contestants drank slowly, except for Heather and Lindsay, who were able to hold down their drinks a lot better.

"Another." Heather exclaimed while the rest were only halfway through their second drinks.

Lindsay soon followed with a similar request and by the time that both of them were asking for their fourth drink, the rest asked for their third.

"How do they do that?" Courtney asked.

"Experience, rookie." Heather teased as she began to chug down the fourth drink.

(Bathroom confessional)

Courtney – Normally I would disapprove of Heather's licentious and promiscuous behaviors, but now that they're helping us win I have to say that I'm impressed.

Gwen – This is one of those things that make me both hate and feel sorry for Heather. She drinks like a skank and feels proud of it, which just pisses me off; but at the same time, I'm pretty sure she acts like that because her parents messed her up bad, which makes me feel sorry for her. The fact that she makes me feel sorry for her just makes me hate that b/bleep/ch even more.

Lindsay-/Slightly drunk/ You know, I've always wanted to see the other girls from this show let loose and have a little fun and finally, I got to! Yay! They're so much nicer when they're letting looser!

Bridgette-/Very drunk/ This sucks. I mean, I want him. He's so nice and so hot, but Geoff, oh my God, Geoff! He's so nice too! S/bleep/t!

Five minutes later, Cody had already reached his limit at the sixth rink and all the remaining girls except for Heather were very much drunk. Courtney was on her sixth drink, Gwen was on her eighth, Bridgette was on her fifth, Lindsay was on her tenth and Heather was on her twelfth.

"Give me another!" Courtney screamed, anxious and angry. "I will not let that blonde bimbo beat me!"

"Calm down Court." Gwen said, sloppy and sort of sad. "We're still gonna win, Heather's on lead."

"I'm still not gonna let that bimbo beat me!" Courtney yelled.

"Who's Carrie talking about?" Lindsay asked, dizzy and giggly. "The only two blondes here are me and you Brianna and we're not bimbos, right?"

"Not in the mood, Linds." Bridgette said, bitter as she finished her drink. "Next round."

Chef served Courtney and Bridgette their drinks. Both begun to drink and promptly didn't make it to the end before blowing chunks.

"Ha, Carrie and Brianna puked!" Lindsay laughed. "They're so icky!"

"Shut up!" Courtney yelled, throwing her mug at Lindsay but missing by inches.

"OK Chef, take them away." Chris instructed.

Immediately, he had to dodge the mug that Courtney threw at him.

"…And be especially careful with that one." He said.

Only Heather, Gwen and Lindsay were left and Heather wasn't showing any signs of even being tipsy. As Gwen finished her ninth drink, her miserable drunk state just got worse.

"I just hope he doesn't see me like this." Gwen muttered to herself.

"Hope who doesn't see you like this?" Heather asked mockingly. "A certain punk boy, maybe?"

"No, why would I care howDuncanwould see me?" Gwen asked, rhetorical and defensive yet speaking slurred. "I meant my mom."

"You said 'he'." Heather replied.

"I meant 'she'. I'm so drunk, I can't even talk well." She said, ironically not pronouncing all the words quite right.

"Sure."

"Want another drink, gruesome?" Chef asked, sarcastic.

Gwen tried to answer but found that all she could do was throw up.

"…And she's out." Chris said. "Only two left."

"Yay!" Lindsay yelled. "I'm winning!"

Then, she raised her glass to chug but accidentally bonked herself in the head with her glass, knocking herself off her bench and falling to the floor, unconscious.

"No, you're not." Heather said, now slightly drunk.

"Team Amazon wins!" Chris proclaimed.

"Great, now can I go to the bathroom?" Heather asked. "I'm holding back a lot of booze and if I don't let go of it I'm going to actually start feeling drunk."

(Bathroom confessional)

Heather – After a lot of drinking I've learnt how to make the alcohol skip through my liver and go straight to my bladder so that I only feel the good effects. Unfortunately, I have to use the bathroom for ten minutes straight afterwards. Which reminds me…/She picks up some toilet paper and uses it to cover the camera, however, the sound is still on/…much better.

"You know, I've always thought you were really hot, Gwen." Cody said. "Have I ever told you that?"

"A million times, Cody." Gwen said.

The victorious Team Amazon was in their movie room. Heather was trying to put on a movie, being the only one who was sober, while the rest of the team drunkenly tried (and often failed) to not fall over/puke/burp/make an ass out of themselves.

"Hey Cody, out of the way, I'm talking to Gwen now!" Courtney exclaimed, shoving Cody off the couch.

"Hey Court, wassup?" Gwen asked.

"Back during Total Drama Action, I wondered whatDuncansaw in you when I thought he was into you and I just couldn't see what. Now, however, I do. I really do." Courtney muttered drunkenly. "I mean, why wouldn't he? You're so nice. You're too nice. I was absolutely cruel to you all throughout the season and you were always trying to be good and make peace. Plus, you're so hot; with that hair, those lips…and that butt."

"Courtney, please stop talking." Gwen said.

"You're right…forget what I just said! I didn't say it! I'm not at all attracted to your totally hot butt. Damn it! Forget I said that!" Courtney said.

"I'll try my absolute best." Gwen said, a little freaked.

"Can we still be friends?" Courtney asked.

"Sure…" Gwen said.

"Best friends?"

Gwen hesitated for a second, but then smiled.

"Sure."

In the cargo deck, Alejandro was sitting under the light of a candle he'd found…studying Bridgette's dossier once more.

"OK, so Geoff forgot her birthday and their one year dating anniversary. That's something I can bring up to push the score towards me." He muttered to himself.

He had been reading the dossier for the better part of half an hour before he heard the drunken trudging of somebody knocking over a nearby box of metal utensils and the cursing in a familiar female voice.

"Damn it!" Bridgette yelled upon knocking over the utensil crate.

"Bridgette?" Alejandro exclaimed in surprise, hiding the dossier.

The blonde stumbled into sight, still drunk from the last challenge.

"Are you OK?" He asked, actually concerned by her current unusual state.

"Yeah, I'm just dizzy from this special non-alcoholic beer with a chemical or something that Chris gave us for a drinking challenge contest or something." Bridgette slurred out.

"What?"

"Doesn't matter." Bridgette said angrily. "What matters is that I'm mad at you."

"What? Why?"

"Because you're confusing me so much!" Bridgette yelled. "I love Geoff, I love him, I love him…but you're so nice and so handsome and he hasn't been nice in a while. Always forgetting about me and only caring about his parties and you're confusing me because you're making me think that maybe I don't love him so much, but I do, I do, I do!"

"Bridgette calm down." Alejandro said soothingly, steadying her by the shoulders. "If I am making you feel so bad I'll just back away. In truth, I have some feelings for you but if you do love Geoff, then I will not tear you apart form him."

"Really?"

"Yes, I want you to be happy."

Then, the inebriated Bridgette kissed him. It was rather sloppy, since she was drunk but it felt good for both of them…though for very different reasons.

(Bathroom confessional)

Bridgette-/Sober and remorseful, groaning/ I am so confused…

"Looks like Bridgette has gotten into some trouble. Will she decide to stick by her man or will she find new love? Will she be on board long enough to make this decision? Who will be the next one not to be on board? Who will remain on board the longest? Find the answers to these repetitive and unnecessary questions next time on Total…Drama…WoooooorldTooooooooouuuur!"

[1]: Parker Kovak is the main character from another Canadian cartoon show called "Producing Parker" which is a far more maturely themed show than the Total Drama series, but that is a great show and I will attempt to corrosver a little in this story. I recommend the show, it's very good.

Please Review.

Gracias Totales,
Mr. Panama Red.