Chapter 6: Late Night Visit

Lounging freely on his sofa with a blanket laid over the lower half of his body, Magnus could feel himself drifting wistfully off to sleep. An episode of America's Got Talent flashed across the screen, but Magnus had swiftly lost interest in it around half an hour ago. The time was fairly late yet he couldn't seem to find the will power to actually go to bed. It was rare that he was ever alone on a Friday night. Usually, he spent his Friday nights roaming around different parties, drinking, occasionally flirting and sometimes even working - something he tried hard to avoid. Tonight he felt slightly pathetic: rather than doing all of those fun, exciting and thrilling things he was cooped up in his loft, with his thoughts constantly drifting towards the pretty shadowhunter boy.

Alexander. What a surprise that boy had been. He'd stumbled into Magnus' apartment, all doe eyed and shy, blushing bashfully every time Magnus spoke to him and somehow, under impossible circumstances, he'd lodged himself into Magnus' mind and maybe even heart. And the worst bit was that Magnus didn't even know why or how. The boy was a Downworlder killer - a typical arrogant shadowhunter who looked down on Downworlders as scum. Or was he? Was Magnus just telling himself that so he could finally get Alexander out of his head?

It had been revealed that the Lightwood boy had slaughtered a group of innocent vampires. At the point of discovery, Magnus hadn't been quite sure what to think or feel. Thinking about it, he should have instantly disregarded Alexander and thrown him out of his mind as if he was nothing but a piece of shadowhunter trash. But of course that hadn't happened, otherwise Magnus would have just been able to peacefully drift off to sleep with no worry in the world. No, Magnus just had to feel sorry for him - he had to have an ache in his heart and an angelic voice in his mind urging him to believe that Alexander was different. Alexander Lightwood is not who you think he is.

His eyes were at least halfway closed when the doorbell rang, its irritating noise clanging through the house, causing him to jump out of his half unconscious state. Sighing in annoyance, Magnus climbed to his feet, his cat doing the same, as he too had been rudely awoken by the bell.

"WHO DARES DISTURB ME AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR." Magnus put on his usual show; shouting down the intercom to place fear and doubt in the visitors mind. This way only those who truly needed help or were desperate enough to see him didn't leave. Unless, of course, they were Ragnor, who blasted his door open and of its hinges - just for the fun of it - every time Magnus answered the doorbell upon his visit.

Silence followed and for a moment Magnus believed he'd scared the visitor away. But somehow, Magnus knew. Something compelled him to continue speaking - to try and convince the visitor to respond. "Really, who is this? My cat and I would love to know." He held back a yawn of tiredness.

There was still no answer. Traces of doubt to who it was were flickering through Magnus' mind. But Magnus' senses were never wrong. And, despite truly knowing that he shouldn't, he wanted to see the person stood in front of his door.

"Look if this is some sort of prank, I know you foolish teens love it nowadays, but-"

"It's a-ah - Alec…" The familiar voice fumbled nervously and Magnus could already imagine the blush forming on Alec's pale cheeks. Magnus didn't know Alec that well - they'd only known each other for a few days - but he'd known in the back of his mind that ranting about something mundane would trigger Alec to speak. Whether this was because of his extensive knowledge of shadowhunters or his growing attraction to Alexander, it was unclear.

"Alexander…" He pushed the surprise into his voice, determined to convince Alexander that he hadn't known it was him all along. If Magnus didn't know himself how he had known, then he didn't need to scare Alexander away with the burden of that knowledge. "Well… You better come inside."

Gliding away from the buzzer, Magnus leaned against the sofa, awaiting the entry of the shadowhunter boy. His eyes flickered towards the TV screen every so often, trying to pull his mind away from quizzical thoughts. Am I pleased to see him? Do I even want him to be here? Why did I not just demand him to leave?

Abruptly, Magnus' thoughts were interrupted as a single knock sounded on the door, before Alexander hesitantly eased the door open.

"Magnus?" he called shyly, his hands gripping the door tightly, as if for stability.

"I'm here, come in," Magnus ushered, gesturing for Alexander to enter his loft. The shadowhunter took a few guarded steps forwards, allowing the door to slam shut behind him. Jumping slightly at the sound, the anxiety seemed to radiate from the poor boy. "What can I do for you?" he asked, his voice monotone.

"I - Nothing." Alec fumbled nervously.

"Nothing?" Magnus raised an inquisitive eyebrow, pushing himself up into a standing position. His eyes rested hard on Alexander, while he searched his expression for answers. "So you simply decided to grace me with your presence at this late hour for nothing?"

"I wanted to talk to you." His voice appeared more confident. It was like the boy had suddenly grown a back bone.

"Talk? And this talk couldn't have happened over the phone or in the morning?" Magnus knew in his own mind that his words were more cruel than Alec deserved, but he couldn't help himself. The boy needed to grow accustomed to Magnus' normal behaviour around ordinary people. Showering him in compliments and love would only give Alexander a wrong idea.

"No." Alec shook his head, a frown engraving itself deeply into his expression. "I just wanted to apologise for today. Not many people know what I've done… I didn't want you to find out that way, I'm sorry."

"Is that an apology for slaughtering Downworlders or simply for failing to inform me that you're a murderer?" In an instant, Magnus could feel the regret pulsing in his mind but he refused - out of stubborn arrogance - to apologise for his hurtful words.

Alec's expression hardened, but his misery and sorrow glistened in his glassy, bright blue eyes. "I didn't do it on purpose. I'm not a murderer," he snapped.

Eyes narrowing in confusion for a moment, Magnus watched Alec inquisitively, before a small, sarcastic laugh escaped his slightly glittered lips. "I would love to believe you, Alexander. Really, it is hard to come by beings as compelling as you are. However, do you really expect me to believe you killed a group of vampires accidentally?"

Alec sighed. A blush rose on his cheeks while his eyes shot down to the floor. "I know it's hard to believe-"

"No, it's impossible to believe," Magnus corrected.

"But I didn't mean to kill those vampires. I kill demons, not Downworlders. There's just something… something wrong with me." Alec appeared to be desperate, but hesitant to explain himself. Shifting uncomfortably from side to side, his hands clenched into fists in frustration.

Magnus frowned again. "Wrong with you? Are we talking about diseases now or general persona?"

"Will you stop making fun of me?!" Alec snapped impatiently. "I'm trying to be serious, I'm trying to explain. I-"

Shaking his head, Magnus held up his hand to stop Alexander. "I apologise." Magnus held back an eye roll and instead nodded his head sincerely. "Why are you poorly attempting to explain yourself to me, Alexander? You owe me nothing."

"I don't want you of all people to think I'm a murderer," Alec mumbled. "I'd rather you know who I actually am."

Magnus sighed as the sympathy overtook the blunt side of him that was tempted to respond with sarcasm. "And who are you? You've appeared three times in my apartment now and I barely know you. Usually I've at least discovered an age or birthplace by now. I must be losing my touch."

"I'm a shadowhunter." Alec shrugged, his body finally relaxed.

"That's it? That's all I get from you?" Magnus let out an exasperated sigh. " You're very enclosed for a shadowhunter, I don't think I've quite met one like you before." He commented under his breath.

"What else do you want me to say?" Alec mumbled. Like before, his shoulders hunched forward, showing off his unwillingness to open up to Magnus. It was incredibly frustrating, especially when Magnus wanted to believe him.

"Tell me more about you. How old are you? Where were you born? What's your favourite colour? What song do you loathe and can't stand listening to? The list of questions about you is endless!" Magnus questioned him, aggravated by the lack of answers he was receiving from the closed off boy.

"I'm 18." Alec spoke robotically, as if reciting a character profile written about himself. "I was born in Idris. I like black. I don't listen to music much."

"Finally. There, you see, now I know something about you other than your name and job." Magnus smiled at his achievement - a bright, genuine smile that rarely adorned his lips.

"What's your favourite colour?" Alec asked, a small smile growing on his lips in response.

"Blue. Like your eyes." Magnus winked, returning to his normal, flirtatious self - he'd almost forgotten his reasoning for staying away from Alexander. It was bewildering how the boy had a strange ability to consume Magnus' every thought in his presence.

Silence lingered for a moment as a rosy blush fluttered onto Alec's cheeks in response. Though he appeared embarrassed, he seemed to be slowly growing used to receiving compliments from Magnus.

"Why did you protect me today?" The questioned seemed to burst from Alec's lips in a curious fluster. "You knew… Before those vampires came you knew what I'd done, so why did you stop the vampire from attacking me?"

For a moment, Magnus remained silent, allowing the question to properly sink in. Why had he saved Alec? Thinking hard for the answer, Magnus felt he knew but was unsure of whether he wished to admit it. He'd saved Alexander purely out of instinct - to satisfy the brief panic he'd felt when he'd seen Lily dive into her attack, with the single goal to kill. But did he want Alec to know this? He'd rarely shown his vulnerable side to anyone in his existence and the ones who he'd risked showing it to had disappeared in some way or another, leaving Magnus' heart torn and broken. Did he want to risk his heart again?

Why do you wish to know? Is it not enough that I saved you?" Magnus responded and guilt instantly arose in him as he saw Alec's expression drop. The open side of him seemed to curl in on itself, closing him off to Magnus.

"I'm sorry…" Alec mumbled. He folded his arms across his chest, holding himself in a more hunched position. "I just don't understand."

"Don't apologise. There is no need." Magnus shook his head, taking a brief step closer towards Alexander, shortening the gap between them. "Whatever it is you are struggling to understand, just ask. I am feeling like an open book today and it is a rarity you should probably take advantage of."

"I -" A blush rose on Alec's cheeks and Magnus watched, with a hint of a smile, as Alec fumbled for his response. The words appeared to catch in Alec's throat as he attempted to speak. It was strange for Magnus to witness - he'd never met a shadowhunter so apprehensive. "Izzy, my sister… She said that you seem to like me - like-like me. When we first me, maybe you did. But now…" Alec shook his head, his eyes pinned to the floor. "I wouldn't be surprised if you hate me."

Magnus sighed. "That wasn't quite a question," he responded with a small chuckle, attempting to lighten the serious mood. "But it will no doubt surprise you to know that I hate very few people, Alexander. And you are far from making the list."

"Even though you think I'm a murderer?" Alec looked up, his eyes hopeful.

Flinching at the sound of the word murderer, Magnus again pushed the doubts about Alexander to the back of his mind, allowing his heart to function his speech. "I admit, it is hard to forget. And you have in no way gained my trust just yet. But there's just something about you, Alexander…"

"So…" Alec's blush only deepened, but he appeared to stand taller and his eyes sparkled with more assurance than before. "You… You like-like me?"

Magnus chuckled. "I'm sorry, like-like? Are we in the 2nd grade now?"

"Look, I haven't done this before. I don't know what the right words are, I don't know what the normal thing to do is… I just thought that-"

"I like-like you?" Magnus teased, smirking brightly, showing off his glistening white teeth.

Alec shook his head. "You're making fun of me," he pointed out, his lips pursed.

"It's called flirting. I have no wish to make you feel at all insulted by me," Magnus informed him. "Tell me, Alexander, now that I have answered your questions. Will you answer mine?"

"Yes." Alec nodded.

"Your parabatai, Jace, is it?" Magnus eyes narrowed as he prepared to study Alec's response. "What sort of affection do you hold for him?"

Alec sighed, his eyes retreating to the floor once again. "Jace is nothing more than a brother. I used to… Just not anymore."

"So your affection for me is by no means a rebound?" Magnus tilted his head to the side, bringing his finger up to meet his chin. He was being much more open in this conversation than he'd first desired, but he could no longer deny the simple fact that he wanted Alexander. Murderer or not, he'd sparked something within Magnus that hadn't awoken in a long time.

"Who said that I held any affection for you?" Alec smirked, appearing jubilant due to his quick, Jace-like response to Magnus' question.

Magnus chuckled, his smile widening. The confident response had appeared from nowhere, replacing the usual closed-off comments from Alexander. Magnus couldn't help but feel pleased with himself that he'd managed to unlock the confident side of Alec. "Two can play the hard-to-get game, Alexander. Don't test me, because I never lose."

"I wish I could say the same," Alec muttered. From anybody else, Magnus would have taken this as a mere comment, but there seemed to be a hint at something more in Alec's words - a possible deeper meaning.

"Now, why are you really here tonight? You say it was because you wished to apologise but that could have been done over the phone."

"I- " Alec stumbled again, his hands fumbling with one another as he seemed to search for the correct answer. "I wanted to see you… I think." His voice was quiet, only a little higher than a whisper.

Tilting his head slightly, Magnus took a few, graceful steps closer to Alexander, his slim figure towering over Alec's broad, defined body. Magnus breathed in, then out, pretending to toy with the answer. Setting his cat eyes hard on Alexander's anxious yet firm features, Magnus allowed the corners of his lips to upturn in a small smile. "You think?"

"I couldn't sleep. So I only meant to come out to walk. But Izzy caught me and we talked… Then I ended up here," Alec said, his mouth hanging open slightly as he sucked in a breath at their close proximity.

"And I'm glad you came, Alexander. Despite my… hostility towards you." Magnus met his tone, his voice dropping to a whisper. "But just be aware that this does not, in any way, mean that I trust you now," he stated seriously. "It is hard to forget your discrepancies, Alexander, despite how compelling you are. But it would be foolish of me to not give you a chance. I want to trust you." What are you doing Magnus? Why are you giving the vampire killer a chance? Pushing these thoughts away, he concentrated on the more pleasant thoughts he had of Alexander. The ones that caused his body to react in ways it hadn't in a long time.

"I can't… I can't tell you why, not yet…" Alexander shook his head, appearing slightly frightened for a moment. "I haven't told anyone before, I've never had to explain it- "

Magnus held a finger up, halting Alec mid speech. "You don't have to. Not until you're ready. I don't wish to force you to do anything you may not want."

"Thank you," Alec breathed. "For saying you'll give me a chance."

"Don't make me regret it."

Gently, Magnus took Alec's hand at his side and Alec jumped at the small contact, his eyes wider than before. Holding back a smirk at the boy's reaction, Magnus pulled Alec's hand closer towards his body and placed his other hand at the tip of the sleeve of the black jumper Alec was wearing. The sleeve lifted and Magnus caught a quick glance of Alec's wrists before the hand shot out of his grip.

Magnus frowned deeply. Small images of Alec's wrist faded in and out of his mind and he could have sworn that he'd seen a black sort of stain covering the area where Alec's veins should be. Had the black liquid been inside of him? Was it merely a simple ink stain? Or was it to do with what was 'wrong' with Alec?

"S-Sorry," Alec mumbled, looking down at the floor. His opposite hand now clasped the wrist that Magnus had caught a swift glance of seconds ago. "Not that arm. It's injured."

Sensing the lie from a mile away but choosing to drop the subject, Magnus nodded in understanding. Somehow, instinctively, he knew not to push Alec and by the fearful expression hovering on his features, Magnus knew he was hiding something - something to do with the very reason that Alec did not yet wish to share with Magnus. Though he was insanely curious, he did not want to scare the shadowhunter away. Not when Magnus was finally advancing in their newborn relationship.

"Maybe your hand then?" Magnus asked, holding out his hand for Alec.

Hesitantly, Alec placed his hand in Magnus', watching Magnus with wary eyes. Clasping his slender fingers around the palm of Alec's hand, Magnus waved his other hand over Alec's and watched merrily as the familiar numbers scrawled themselves into Alec's skin.

Alec's eyes widened as they moved to stare at his hand rather than Magnus.

"Here. Now you have my number. Text me when you are ready to talk." Magnus ordered softly, taking yet another step closer to Alexander. "Or if you ever need my help."

Refusing to let go of Alec's hand, Magnus confidently leaned forward, just enough so that his face was mere centimetres from Alec's. Locking his eyes with Alec's, he waited for any response. Alec leaned forward, allowing Magnus to lay his soft lips gently on his. Moving one hand up to Alec's cheek, Magnus brought himself closer as he caressed Alec's smooth lips, enjoying their minty taste. After a few moments of bliss, Magnus pulled back. He could only imagine what it would feel like if he'd continued to kiss and caress even more. All in due time, Magnus. Don't kill him with your charm just yet.

By the look of innocent shock and surprised pleasance that adorned Alec's face, Magnus could tell that Alec was feeling exactly what he felt. "I'll text you later." Alec spoke more confidently, his voice husky but firm. Without a single shred of hesitance, Alec pulled his hand out of Magnus' and brought it up to touch Magnus' cheek in return, before placing a single, sweet kiss on his surprised lips.

And with that, Alec scurried out of Magnus' apartment, leaving Magnus frozen, staring surprisedly at the place where Alec had stood mere seconds ago and indulging himself in the nostalgia of their first kiss.

~ Lost Hope ~

There was no feeling to describe it. No singular emotion. Tingles surged through his whole body, while his lips prickled with previously undiscovered pleasure. Alec Lightwood felt alive, for the first time in his existence. The childish glee and satisfaction he felt could not compare to anything else.

He sauntered down the empty Brooklyn avenues, a spring in his step, focusing on the bright neon lights and the exuberant feeling of the night that echoed through the streets of New York City. It was something he'd rarely noticed before; the beauty and life in the world around him. Before, the world had been such an evil and menacing place, where he felt like he was being constantly chased by monsters and trepidation. Now, after that one ecstatic hour in Magnus' loft, he finally felt the same elation with the world that he'd only read about in novels and fantasies. He finally felt normal.

However, the more distance he put between himself and the loft, the more the feeling began to fade. While weaving through the familiar alleyways towards the New York institute, the condemning tiredness finally hit his body. It was, after all, past 3am. His eyes drooped and his shoulders hunched, his swift walk morphing to a trudge. The blare of a car horn clattered through the air, clanging in his ears, causing him to wince in slight pain.

The sudden change in emotion seemed normal to Alec at first - it was like the effects of the 'Magnus drug' were wearing off and he was feeling the dangerous after effects. It wasn't until he reached a darkened, silent alleyway that he had to stop abruptly. Leaning up against the wall with his head in his hands, he felt his mind cloud with fatigue. As he placed his hands back at his sides, he breathed deeply before trying to blink, attempting to adjust his eyes to the bleakness of the alleyway. That was when the pain hit him.

Crumpling to the floor in agony, Alec let out a familiar cry of excruciation as his heart doubled its pace, attempting to rip itself out from beneath Alec's skin. He writhed on the floor, thrashing and crashing into the ground, clenching and unclenching his hands. Forcing his eyes to open, he used his remaining strength to tear the sleeve of his jumper, revealing his dark, pulsing wrist - answering the one question he feared. It was happening again.

Panting, he attempted to reach for his phone in his back pocket. A surge of pain struck him again. And again. And again. He screamed while his body jerked uncontrollably, his muscles contracting at a deadly speed. He tried to endure. He tried to be strong. He tried to kill the pain within him.

But the monster broke free.

So Alec and Magnus have finally sort of admitted that they have feelings for each other and they kissed! :D I loved writing this chapter so I hope you loved reading it. Thanks for all the support so far! Don't forgot to review this chapter and tell me what you think happened to Alec at the end. I hope I'm portraying all the characters well and thank you to my Beta SilverySparks who's edited these chapters for me, they wouldn't be the same without her :)
-DareToDream