A/N – I was just going to leave the "Running into Trouble" reflection at one chapter, but of course Harold started clamoring to add his perspective!

XXX

We can make believe I love you,
We can make believe that you love me.
Others find peace of mind in pretending,
Couldn't you?
Couldn't I?
Couldn't we?

~Make Believe, Showboat

XXX

Harold Hill was finding himself increasingly knocked off balance by Marian Paroo, and he didn't like it one bit.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. He relished each and every one of their interactions, which had only grown more and more scintillating as time passed. Ever since the librarian had come down from her lofty perch that afternoon the Wells Fargo Wagon delivered her little brother's cornet, she'd warmed up to him like cold butter melting over fresh toast. While she hadn't outright thrown herself at him, it was plain to see that she'd thawed considerably in her initial assessment of his personality and credentials.

Harold congratulated himself for snatching yet another victory from the jaws of defeat. The way to Marian Paroo's heart had indeed proven to be through her beloved younger brother – in making Winthrop happy, he'd made Marian happy, and he considered it one of his greatest achievements yet in River City. He had thought the librarian the most gorgeous of women when he first spotted her marching icily and imperiously by the town square, seemingly oblivious to the stir he'd caused. She'd been a tough nut to crack, but well worth the effort. When she gazed at him with those captivating hazel eyes and beamed at him with those kissable crimson lips, she was even more incandescent. Marian Paroo truly had to be one of the most delectable women he'd ever encountered. And it wasn't just her looks that enchanted him, it was also her keen intelligence, sharp wit, and indomitable spirit. She wasn't just gorgeous, she was thrilling. They would probably have had the most wonderful conversations, if they'd had anything tangible to talk about. It was no wonder he'd been plagued with dreams of her from the first night he'd come to River City!

Now see, he really had to stop thinking like that. Harold was getting much too sentimental for his own good. Like every other woman he'd ever met, Marian Paroo was nothing more than a passing fancy, even if she posed one of the most intriguing challenges he'd ever encountered. Of course, the same qualities of her personality that he so admired were a dangerous liability to his line of work, but he had always been the kind of man who craved the excitement such danger brought. He was certain that once he managed to successfully seduce her, she'd cease to be such a fascinating enigma, and he'd be itching to hop on the next train out of town.

But for all that Harold thought he had Marian Paroo figured out – she was the sadder-but-wiser girl masquerading as maiden-lady librarian – she still somehow managed to surprise him. What's more, she was actually throwing him off his game, to his chagrin. Certainly, he hadn't expected her to be too easy, even though it was clear that she liked him. It was the most fortuitous of events that he had literally run into her this evening – he had been attempting to see her, but even he wasn't audacious enough to engineer this kind of crash, lest he cause real injury. When he had thrown his arms around Marian, it was an honest gesture of both steadying himself and ensuring that she wouldn't topple over. Of course, it had proved to be an excellent opportunity to flirt with her – her soft curves felt just as warm and wonderful against him as he'd been dreaming, and he could see from the delectable blush that colored her cheeks that she was just as affected by their close proximity.

Harold had never wanted to lean in and kiss her so badly as he did this moment. Marian made him feel giddy in a way he hadn't experienced since he was a teenage boy just discovering the wonder and delight of canoodling with the fairer sex. So when she impishly but firmly rebuffed his come-on, he was truly miffed. Fortunately, this uncomfortable feeling soon faded. While it was a blow to his masculine pride, he couldn't help admiring her sheer Iowa stubbornness. Not many women could keep their wits so adroitly about them when he turned on the charm – especially when he had his arms around them!

For a split second, Harold contemplated leaning in and kissing her, anyway. For all her standoffishness, her tone was awfully coquettish. But the survival instincts he'd carefully honed over the years told him not to storm full speed ahead. Though Marian Paroo had started to let her guard down with him, her overall demeanor was still more warning than inviting. It was time to back away, just a little bit, and apologize for his forwardness.

As ever, heeding his instincts paid dividends. When Marian looked genuinely upset at the prospect of his never attempting to woo her again, Harold knew that it was only a matter of time before he succeeded in winning her over completely. He just needed to be patient, to play the long game. Admittedly, it was hard to think straight when he was standing so close to the lovely librarian. Her presence muddled him in a way he wasn't used to, even when he was actively courting a woman he genuinely desired.

As if this wasn't bad enough, Marian had then gone and asked him, in the softest and sweetest voice he'd ever heard from her, if he'd truly been trying to see her tonight. At that, Harold was really knocked off balance, even more than he'd been by her sharp-tongued rebuff. She didn't sound anything at all like the sadder-but-wiser girl when she talked like that. She sounded like an innocent and lonely woman. A woman who'd never known the kind of heated passion Mrs. Shinn and her ladies implied she did. A woman who had long given up the possibility of getting married but still desperately wanted to be loved, even for just a moment. He considered the possibility her question was an extremely clever ruse to draw him in, but something in him insisted it was absolutely genuine. Whether she knew it or not, Marian Paroo was falling in love with him.

But Harold knew it, and he also knew that he could have had her. Right now, if he wanted to. While she may have balked at the idea of going back to his hotel room just yet, he certainly could have kissed her. He should have kissed her. Now that the boys had their instruments, his time in River City was starting to run out, and he had a feeling that making love to the librarian just once wasn't going to be enough for him.

Instead, what did he do? Harold found himself telling her, in a voice that was just as diffident and tender, that he did mean to see her. And he had called her Marian. He hadn't meant to do that, it just slipped out. Almost like he was a lovesick boy, instead of a seasoned man. The play of emotions across the librarian's beautiful face as she contemplated his response put him in even more danger. He'd never been so near to falling head over heels with a woman in his entire life. The only woman he'd ever truly loved – and this was in a platonic, filial way – was his mother. Harold may have been spinning his webs around Marian, but she had him on the line and was reeling him in just as steadily. And as he told Marcellus not too long ago, he wasn't about to get caught in that trap, no sir! He was so flustered by her sweet vulnerability and his unusual behavior that he had to immediately skedaddle so he could get his head back on straight before proceeding with any further seduction.

But even after Harold was safely ensconced back in his room at the boarding house, he wasn't out of danger just yet. When he recalled the wistful way Marian had looked at him, he was almost undone. For a moment, he allowed himself to ponder what could have happened if he'd met the librarian back when he was still a legitimate salesman. Would he have been so taken with her that he remained on the straight and narrow? Would she have been interested in the honest Gregory Granger (he had long ago relinquished the stifling straightjacket of being Daniel Joseph Kaczmarek to anyone but his mother). Or was she attracted solely to the grandiose and larger-than-life bandleader he was currently masquerading as, because she desperately craved the excitement he'd stirred up in poky little River City? Even though Harold Hill would have had something more genuine to offer her as Gregory Granger, he wasn't selling music at the time. The magic might not have been there, the way it was now.

Again, Harold had to squelch that line of thought, because it was starting to make his heart race and his pulse pound – and not in a good way. It was much too dangerous to go down that road. He remembered too well what happened the last time he liked a woman he was conning (the cynical and sophisticated city gals he met in between cons and occasionally looked up again later didn't count, as they understood each other's true natures and there was absolutely no danger of anyone falling in love there). The knife scar on his side wouldn't ever let him forget what a foolish error in judgment that kind of sentimentality was. Of course, there wasn't an angry ex-fiancé waiting in the wings to dog his pursuit of Marian – heck, there wasn't even an overprotective father to worry about! So there wasn't likely to be any danger to him from that quarter.

No, the danger was entirely to his heart. He couldn't afford to develop real feelings for Marian Paroo. It would take more than being in love with her to keep him in River City, Iowa, and she would never consent to living life on the lam with him – especially after she found out what he truly was. Even if she were to contemplate such a harebrained idea, he couldn't, in what little conscience that remained to him, make her a willing accomplice to his crimes. He wasn't nearly a good enough man to say no to going to bed with her outside the bonds of matrimony, but even he found it too indecent and repulsive to drag her into his wayward life.

So they could only have this summer. And that would surely be enough, at least for him. Although he was a bit off balance at the moment, Harold was certain he would come back to his senses once he'd finally gone to bed with Marian and gotten her mysterious allure out of his system. It was just the challenge of actually getting there that was making him so sentimental. A man always idealized the woman he couldn't easily have.

Although Harold still couldn't help hoping, as he had never really cared to do before, that Marian would remember their brief time together just as fondly as he would.