Okay,

Potterlady did you know that I give all my readers that leave me a way to contact them info on the upcoming stuff? like guess lists? because you are missing out honey. I really want to give you more inside info but since you arent leaving a contact I can't. Obviously I won't tell you anything directly(well, I did for some people in the beginning, on what the pairs were.) But I will give you clues as to who the two narrators are. And yes, I said narrators. This story is getting funnier right now.

"Harry awoke next to his lover," said a voice.

Harry opened his eyes and saw Cho's naked body in the sunlight.

"And he goggled at her basoomas with a feeling of want." the voice finished.

Harry sat up straight and looked around.

"Who said that?" He asked, but he didn't think anybody had actually said anything. He must've heard it from his own head.

"I do not have a feeling of want." Harry said loudly, just in case.

"A feeling of want for what?" Cho's sleepy head popped up, thinking he was talking to her.

"You." Immediately Harry blushed, and Cho play slapped him.

"Sorry, I thought someone had said that to me. It must've been a dream." Harry apologized, shaking his head.

"Harry could feel the large basoomas pressing against his back, the tits soft in the morning heat." The voice teased Harry.

Harry blushed and felt them on his back all of a sudden, as he had not noticed before. He felt himself get hard, and he blushed more. "Shut the hell up." Harry said, sure that Cho had heard the voice this time.

But when he looked at her she was frowning at him like he was mad.

"Who are you talking to?"

"I'm sorry Cho, I have to go to the bathroom..." Harry hurried off to the bathroom.

"Harry skips off to the bathroom to masturbate, thinking his lover will not know what he is doing even though his dick is almost a meter from his testicles."

Harry stopped in his tracks and yelled back to Cho, "I'm not masturbating, just so you know. I really have to go to the bathroom!"

"Well, then go." She shooed him with her hand, frowning at him, and wondering if he was this mad every morning, or if it had been the sex that drove him over the edge.

"Cho enters the kitchen after itching her crotch and stretching. She takes a bottle of gin out of the cupboard to drown her sorrows in."

"I didn't do any of those things!" Cho cried to no one in particular.

As she looked at her hand she saw that it was holding gin, though she could have sworn two seconds ago it was pancake mix. She itched her head and put it back in the cupbaord and rummaged for something breakfast-worthy.

"Harry enters the room and stares at Cho's fat arse, wondering if she used mind tricks to make it look smaller last night."

Cho turned around and saw a dressed Harry staring at her. "How did you know!!??" she squeaked.

"How did I know what?" Harry asked, sitting down at the dining table.

"You know..." She faltered, her voice from high to low octaves in less than a second.

"About my arse." She whispered, embarrassed.

Harry frowned and looked at her. Then he curved his neck pretending to see around her body.

"Looks fine to me." He said, and Cho breathed out, color returning to her face.

"She thinks Harry doesn't know about this little confidence issue of hers. But she's wrong."the voice teased her.

"Bloody hell, stay away from me!" Cho screamed, making Harry jump.

"What did I do?" He asked, staring into her brown eyes.

"Nothing..."

Don't have sex with her, don't have sex with her, don't have sex with her!!!

"You know you want to. Her body was HOT and you know it."

"I do not!!!"Ron yelled, enough for Luna to come downstairs in her slip and ask him what in Goddess' name he was screaming like a chimp for.

"BECAUSE I WANT YOU!" the voice yelled, making Ron jump, and then blush because Luna heard it.

"Well?" Luna looked at him, annoyed.

"I-er- I thought I saw something move." Ron stuttered, awe growing inside of him. Could anybody be that deaf?

Maybe I'm hearing things. No, argued Ron rationally, I'm not mad. Am I?

"You're mad." The voice determined.

"You're not mad, Ron, I thought I saw something earlier too." Luna confided.

Oh great, this coming from the Loony. Ron rolled his eyes.

"What was it?"

"Oh. It turns out it was just a leaf. But it could be a nargle. Nargles have the ability to change into any disguise that suits them, you know." Luna raised an eyebrow at him sternly as if he should be more careful in the future. Ron couldn't tell her what was really going on, so he played along.

"Are nargles dangerous?" Ron asked, mock biting his lip in fear.

"As DANGEROUS as your body looks?"

Ron shuddered at the voice again, forcing down the urge he had to hit anything that moved right now.

Luna didn't see through his charade, and answered in a whisper while leaning towards him, "Yes."

"Oh dear. Well, I shall be careful then." Ron turned around and went to the couch, sat down and started shoving spaghetti in his face so Luna could see he couldn't talk and would leave, but Luna took a different idea from his gluttony.

"Good idea, eat now, they only prey on the starving."

Ron nearly choked on the golf ball sized gulp he took and reached for his water.

"GET DOWN!!" shouted Luna, and the next thing Ron knew, Luna was lunging forward on top of him in her dainty pink slip.

"You like the feeling of this frightened female on top of you, holding onto you for mercy from fear."

"SHUT THE HELL UP!!" Ron shouted, and looked down onto his chest to see Luna frowning on top of him.

"Shh." She put her finger to his lips.

"Shatoogleys destroy water. You could've gotten killed. They rip things to pieces. Sharp claws. You need sharp claws to do destroy water."

Ron was considering asking Luna what the bloody hell a Shatoogley was, but he stopped when he realized she probably never met one.

She kissed him. "You know one thing they don't mind?"

"What's that?" Ron murmured, enticed by her behavior. She was stroking him and moving her lips around his neck and he got a full view of her cleavage.

"Making love."

"Yeah, you like that, don't you Ron?"

thank you for reading. buh bye.