Regina blinks up at the darkened ceiling and takes a breath, turning her head on the pillow and a sad smile stretches across her lips as she looks at Robin beside her. Reaching out she runs her fingers against his stubbly cheek and sighs as she feels a swirl of mixed emotion swelling in her chest.
Happiness was always something that eluded her and most of the glimpses she had of it were from the outside looking in—and when it was really hers, she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always waiting for that moment when it would snatched away. Inevitably, it always was—except in the times when she was the one who pushed it away. She takes another breath and she hears his voice echoing in her ears, him saying that he wished he could call her his wife and again, she feels the churning at her core, and wishes that she felt differently. Taking a short breath, she swallow the lump at the back of her throat and hopes that she's not a disappointment to him because what they have together is more than she ever dared to hope for and losing it would be her undoing.
Ellie's cries interrupt her thoughts, though they're barely muffled whimpers. On another morning, she might wait to see if Ellie tired herself out and went back to sleep, but this isn't any other morning and she's glad for the distraction, glad to have something to think about other than all of the ways she can dismantle her own happiness.
Carefully, she pulls away from Robin, adjusting his arm to the space beside her before sliding from the warm bed, groaning a little as the cool morning air surrounds her. She reaches for her robe and knots it at the waist, quickly making her way toward Ellie's nursery. When she arrives she finds the little girl standing in her crib, her arms outstretched as she marches in place, whimpering impatiently as Regina comes into view. Regina smiles as she lifts her and immediately Ellie's hands press against her shoulders and her cheek at her chest. She cuddles her closer, wrapping her arms tightly around her as she starts to sway, cradling and rocking, as Ellie continues to fuss.
"Oh my princess," she murmurs, as her hand feels over Ellie's pajama-covered diaper. "I know…I know…it's not fair when we wake up before we're ready." She lays her back on the changing table, unsnapping her pajamas and grinning as Ellie distracts herself with her foot. She tickles the bottom as she reaches for a clean diaper and Ellie giggles, then lets out a muffled cry at the loss of contact. "Shhh, I know, princess," she says. "We're almost done."
When Ellie's pajamas are snapped back into place she lifts her from the changing table and cuddles her against her chest as they make their way to the glider. She reaches for Ellie's duck as they pass the crib, and together they settle on the glider. Regina strokes her hand through Ellie's hair, winding her fingers though her loose curls as Ellie chews on her duck's bill. Suddenly, her eyes begin to droop and she's somewhat aware when the glider stops moving as she drifts toward the sleep that's evaded her all night.
"Boo!" She hears Ellie's voice before she feels her hands on her cheeks. "Boo!"
Her eyes flutter open to see Ellie kneeling on her lap, the girl's small hands on her cheeks and pressing at her eyes. She smiles and pulls her hands away, kissing Ellie's fingers as she giggles. When she looks up, Robin is sitting on the ottoman in front of her, the baby monitor in one hand as his other hand rubs over her knee.
She offers him a meek smile as she readjusts Ellie on her lap, "What time is it?"
"Four forty-five."
She swallows and sighs, and her eyes fall to her knee, watching as his finger tips slide against the bare skin. "I'm sorry I woke you."
"You didn't wake me," he says easily. "Our daughter did. She's been babbling for awhile." When she doesn't look up, he slides forward until his knees are touching hers and his hand slides further up her leg. "You're upset," he concludes with a sigh. She shakes her head, but still doesn't look up—she's never been a very convincing actress, so she doesn't try to pretend. Instead, she stays quiet. "I upset you."
"It's not you."
"But it's what I said last night," he says with a sigh. "It was thoughtless and…"
"No," she cuts in, finally looking up at him. "It wasn't thoughtless."
His head tips to the side and he looks doubtfully back at her. He leans in, letting his hand slide up her thigh as he presses his lips to her cheek and pulls Ellie from her lap. She watches as he settles the baby in her crib, tucking her blanket around her and giving her a new pacifier as she tucks her duck beneath her arm and snuggles in contently. Her breath catches at the back of her throat as he turns back to her. He sits down on the ottoman and slides forward until they're knee-to-knee, and then he smiles.
"It was thoughtless. I got caught up in a moment, and…I said it without thinking. We've never talked about marriage and any time we've mentioned it, it's been about how much of a formality it would be and how unnecessary it seems, given our life together." He takes a breath and reaches for her hand, and she watches as he laces his fingers though hers. "And I love the life we have together."
She looks back at him, "Are you sure you don't want…more?"
"More?" He asks with a hint of a laugh behind his voice. "Oh, love. No…" He sighs as his thumb rubs at the base of her wrist. "Yes, I do believe that marriage is a beautiful expression of love, but not the only expression of love and it's not for everyone."
"But it was for you, before me."
She watches as he hesitates and just as she's about to drop her eyes away, he smiles and he nods. "It was, once. But that was completely different—a different time and a different place with two entirely different people." He gives her hand a soft squeeze. "I am not the same man who married Marian—which is probably a good thing because I don't think you would have liked him very much." At that, she feels a grin tug at one corner of her mouth. "I don't need you to have my name or wear my ring to know that we're committed to each other. Regina, I am in this for the long haul—so long as you'll have me."
She nods slightly as her grin widens and he offers her his own smile as he leans in closer. "I'm sorry," she murmurs, "For…"
"Don't. Don't apologize. There's nothing to apologize for," he interjects softly. "Come on. Let's get you back to bed," he murmurs as he tugs her up from the glider and slips his arm around her. Her head instinctively falls to his shoulder as they slowly walk to their bedroom.
"Hey," she breathes out as she turns in his arms and links her arms around his neck, smiling when his arms circle around her waist. "I'm in this for the long haul, too. You know that, right?"
"I do," he tells her with a confident nod as he leans in to kiss her with a kiss that's sweet and fleeting, and gives her the assurance she needs.
When she finally makes her way downstairs, it's well-past nine. She can hear voices and laughter coming from the kitchen, and when she reaches the kitchen, she can't help the smile that stretches across her lips—and her first thought is how much she loves them. Henry and Roland are perched on stools with Ellie between them in her high-chair as Robin makes breakfast. She can tell it's been a messy process—there are bowls in the sink, cartons of fruit sit atop the counter and there is a splotch of forgotten batter forgotten by the stove. She watches as Henry drops a few blueberries on Ellie's tray and she pouts, watching as Robin flips two hot pancakes onto her brothers' plates.
"Hey mom," Henry calls, as he looks up and reaches for the syrup.
"Nice of you to join us," Robin says, grinning as she comes into the kitchen and sits on a stool beside Henry. He hands her a plate and kisses her cheek. "Did you sleep well?"
"I did…"
"I don't think you've ever slept this late," Henry blinks. "It's almost ten."
"I know, it was…a nice change," she tells him, as she catches Robin's grin as he pours more batter into the pan and her thoughts drift back to early that morning. She remembers the way his lips had sucked gently at her neck while his fingers unknotted her robe and pushed it from her shoulders and she remembers how he'd knelt beside her as she laid on the bed, his fingers working over her back and shoulders, rubbing and squeezing as he lips tailed intermittent kisses over her skin until she'd finally drifted to sleep.
She watches as he flips the pancake and then she turns her attention back to the boys. "How was your sleepover?"
Roland blinks up from his pancake and nods, "It was fun. We played superheroes."
"Yeah?" She asks, reaching out and wiping a smudge of syrup from his cheek. "Which one were you."
"Hawkeye," he says. "'Cause I know how to use a bow and arrow."
"Hawkeye is my favorite, too," Regina says with a grin. "And also because I have a think for bows and arrows."
"Moooom," Henry groans as he scrunches his nose and stabs his fork into a strawberry. "Seriously?"
"What?" Regina asks with an innocent shrug. "He's always been my favorite."
Henry rolls her eyes and she laughs as Robin drops two pancakes onto her plate. He plates two of his own and sits down beside her, and again she finds herself smiling as Henry and Roland slip into a playful debate about the merits and accomplishments of superheroes while Ellie attempts to levitate a blueberry, laughing at rises and frowning as it falls. A smile twists onto her lips as Robin stabs his fork into one of the sliced apples on her plate and she looks up at him to find his blue eyes sparkling—he looks happy, she thinks—and then she realizes, so is she.
In spite of herself, she's happy—and she can't help but wonder why it leaves an ache in her chest.
She laughs as Roland runs past her, his lips barely grazing her cheek as she bends to kiss him before he clatters out the door behind Henry, more than excited to be joining Henry and Tiana at the park—and likely a little afraid of being forgotten.
"I'm glad Henry invited him," Regina says, as the front door slams and her eyes shift to Robin, who is chuckling softly at the whirlwind that's just passed through the living room. "I know he's been feeling a little left out since Henry's starting hanging out with Tiana."
"He's not used to having to share his Henry," Robin says, glancing up at her as he blows a raspberry on the bottom of Ellie's foot. Ellie's laugh rings out and she kicks her feet as Robin scoops her up and pecks at her chubby cheeks, again glancing at sideways at Regina. "And I'd venture that that makes two of you."
She slides down onto the floor behind him and cocks her head, "Two of us?"
"Yes. Two of you going through Henry withdrawals," Robin says as Ellie continues to laugh. "Perhaps you and Roland should form a little support group," he teases.
"That's quite unnecessary," she says with a roll of her eyes.
"You like her though, right?"
"I do. I even suggested that Henry invite her to dinner so she can actually try my lasagna instead of just hearing about it." A slight smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. "He looked horrified at the prospect, but I think he's going to ask her."
"Your lasagna may even be worth the inevitable interrogation."
"I'm not going to interrogate the poor girl. I really do like her."
"I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about Roland," he says with a sigh, shaking his head another, softer smile forms on his lips. "You know, this might sound crazy, but sometimes I forget that they haven't always had each other."
"That doesn't sound crazy at all," she replies, watching as Ellie rests her head on his shoulder and bats her eyelashes, and in that moment, she looks so much like Robin with her wide blue eyes and sweet dimpled smile. Regina smiles as Ellie cuddles closer to him, her small hands clutching his shirt as he presses another kiss against her cheek—such a daddy's girl, she thinks. Reaching out, she strokes her fingers up Ellie's arm and her fingers twirl through one of her loose curls that suddenly look decidedly redder. "Sometimes it's easy to…forget."
"You know, I see you in her."
"You…do?" She asks, her eyes darting up to meet his, finding them easy and soft, shining back at her in a way that makes her heart flutter and swell. "You see me in her?"
"Just as I see you in Henry," Robin nods and rubs his fingers absently over her knee as a small smile stretches over his lips. "I see it when she gets mad…
"Oh great. You see my temper in her."
"No," he laughs. "Not exactly."
"Then what?"
"When she's mad," he begins again, "She takes these short little huffy breaths. You do that, too."
He shoulders straighten and she catches her bottom lip between her teeth as she tries not to smile. "We are not huffy."
"You're doing it right now," Robin says, clearly amused by her struggle against her smile. She bats her hand against his forearm and he laughs out before leaning in for a quick kiss—eliciting an unsatisfied little grunt and a loud sigh from Ellie before her bottom lip juts out in a pout, innocently proving her father's point. "See?" He asks, his eyebrow arching, "Like mother, like daughter—and I couldn't be prouder."
Finally, she gives into her smile, letting it warm her cheeks as she watches Robin lifts Ellie as he tips back against the couch and playfully nibbles at her cheek. Again, her little laugh rings out and Regina feels a fluttering in her chest.
It's strange to think that this little girl—with all the sweetness and light she's brought into their lives—was meant to tear them apart. Reaching out, she stokes two fingers over the bottom of Ellie's foot, her smile deepening as Ellie's head falls back to look at her. A lopsided and mostly toothless smile looks back at her as Ellie's eyelashes flutter.
"Mama," she says, waving across the short distance.
Regina waves back, her eyes shifting briefly to Robin as he continues to strum his fingers up and down Ellie's back, and finds herself thinking of that day in the park, the day Zelena's plan shifted into motion. It seems so long ago that she and Robin sat together on that park bench, her heart beating faster and faster as she realized the meaning of his words, the meaning of his choice—and then, just as life had taught her to expect, it was ripped away only moments later.
But then, life had thrown her another unexpected curve, and suddenly Robin was back in her life and they were presented with another choice and it made her doubt all the other lessons life had taught her.
"Can I…ask you something?" She tentatively asks as his eyes shift up to meet hers. She takes a breath and tries to push away the dull, but panging guilt at her core. "Why did you want to marry Marian?"
"Regina…"
"I'm serious," she says, her voice urging him. "I want to know."
"You want to know about why I wanted to marry Marian," he states, his eyes skeptical as they search hers.
She nods, "Well, obviously you loved her, but…" She smiles, trying to make him see that this isn't a 'her-versus-me' question, that there's no jealousy or envy, no comparisons drawn, and the question isn't even really about Marian, it's about him and her only motive is to better understand him. "Why marry her?"
He hesitates for a moment, narrowing his eyes as he considers. "I…I liked who I was when I was with her," he says finally. "I liked the man she made me. I was better with her than without and…it just felt right. We felt right." A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth—and she enjoys that the question has brought back happy memories for him. "We were partners in every sense of the word. It was us against the world, and…and I liked our odds."
Again she finds herself nodding as a soft grin stretches over her lips—and she thinks of how different his experience with marriage was from hers and how differently he thinks of it—a partnership rather than ownership. And she wonders if, perhaps, this isn't another one of life's lessons that she's gotten wrong.
"Why?" He asks, as he shifts Ellie up against his chest as her hooded eyes close. "Is this about last night? Because if it is, you need to know that just because something was right for me and Marian doesn't mean it's what's right for us." He smiles as he reaches out covers her hand with his and she feels her breath catch in her chest. "I meant what I said this morning—just because what you and I have together is different, it doesn't mean it's less." He leans into her, capturing her lips between his, and offering her soft, sweet kiss as his fingers slide through her hair. The kiss is without intention, only serving her purpose of comfort—and it helps.
When she pulls back, his lips try to follow, not wanting to break the kiss and not ready for their moment to end. She laughs a little, leaning in and pecking his lips before resting her forehead against his. "I have to go into my office for a little bit."
"But it's Sunday…"
"I know, but you know better than anyone I spent the majority of Friday not working."
He grins, "Oh. Yeah…" He chuckles softly. "That's right, and…that's my fault."
"I won't be long," she tells him, again pecking his lips. "There are just a few that I need to finish up before Monday."
"And then I'll have you all to myself?"
"And then you'll have me," she confirms, yet again leaning in for an all too quick kiss as her hand slides against the bottom of Ellie's foot. "I'll be back before nap time is over." She offers him one more fleeting kiss before she's up and out the door—and her mayoral duties are the last thing on her mind.
"Do you think it's possible that I'm trying to sabotage my life?" Regina asks as soon as the door opens, barely glancing up from the storybook that's splayed open on her desk. From the corner of her eye, she catches Mary-Margaret's eyebrow raise as she closes the door.
"Is that…my wedding story?"
"Yeah," Regina replies, again, not looking up, instead, letting her eyes wander over the details of the image, realizing just how many of the little details from the moment she missed, despite having stood before them in the actual scene. "You were protecting him. I…didn't notice that before…the way you stepped in front of him."
Mary-Margaret slips into one of the chairs across from her desk and leans forward, offering a hint of a smile as she looks down at the open page. "I was," she confirms. "Though, I don't really know what I thought that sword was going to do to you if you'd really been there to harm us."
Regina's eyes jump to Mary-Margaret and a slow smirk stretches across her lips, "Well, you always did have a tendency not to fully think things through…which is probably something you learned from me." She pauses and takes a breath as her eyes fall back to the page, her finger running over the place where Snow White's hand touches Prince Charming's wrist—such a subtle yet meaningful show of affection. "But you were still able to be happy, in spite of it." She looks up, "In spite of everything."
Mary-Margaret's brow furrows deeper, "Regina, what's going on? Is this about Zelena?"
"No," she's quick to say. "That's…still at a stalemate and the longer it lasts, the less inclined Robin and I are to let her back in to Ellie's life. It appears she's made her choice, and we've made ours." She smiles softly, somewhat surprised at what a relief it is to say those words aloud, outside of a conversation with Robin—how freeing even just the possibility of a life without Zelena's presence feels. "But, this isn't about Zelena."
"Then…."
"I don't think I know how to be happy," she says simply, shrugging her shoulders as she turns the pages of the storybook to her own story—or her almost-story with Robin. She looks down at the page, focusing on the fear in her eyes as she remembers the churning feeling in her stomach—how fear had pushed the air from her lungs, choking her and making it impossible to breathe, how her heart had beat so fast it felt like it might explode in her chest and how the little voice at the back of her head reminder her that love only brought pain. But what she remembers most clearly is the aching relief that had washed over her as she ran further and further from the tavern, convincing herself that she'd saved herself from yet another loss of love—a defense mechanism she'd learn to rely on.
"That was a long time ago, Regina," Mary-Margaret says in a soft voice. "And you found him again. Everything worked out in the end."
There's a long and hesitant pause as Regina's eyes shift back at Mary-Margaret. "Last night, Robin…told me that he wished he could call me his wife."
Mary-Margaret's eyes widen, "He proposed?"
"Not exactly. He…might have been about to, and…and I did what I always do. I pushed him away."
"Oh, Regina…"
"I just froze and all I could think of was how I didn't want things to change. I didn't want us to change. I didn't want…"
"To be married to him?"
With a sigh, she looks back to the storybook and thinks of the alternate version, the version in which she chose love and happiness and she wonders what it would have been like, to live a lifetime with him in that former life. "I…don't know."
"You don't know what, Regina?"
"I don't know if I don't want to marry him. I love him and I know that he loves me, and…our life together is martial in every way expect legally." She looks up and offers a sheepish grin, "Which is ironic, considering I am the law." She shrugs her shoulders, "I guess I'm just not very good at being happy."
"Well, it's hard to be good at something you haven't had much practice at," Mary-Margaret says gently, reaching out and covering her with hers, and it surprises her when she doesn't pull away. When she looks up, Mary-Margaret is looking at her with sweet, kind eyes that remind her so much of the ten-year-old girl she'd saved all those years before, and she smiles, glad that that little girl's faith in her has remained. "I know you're not one for hope speeches…"
"You really do work for the Hope Commission, don't you?"
A coy smirk forms over Mary-Margaret's lips, "Well, the Commission is offering a rebate—a quarter back—if you can honestly answer one question."
"Just one question? No speech?" Regina says with a slight laugh. "I guess it's my lucky day."
Her expression turns serious and Regina feels her own smile fade and her heart flutters nervously. "Regina, do you believe you deserve to be happy?"
"I…want to be happy."
"That's not what I asked." She feels herself begin to withdraw as she leans back in the chair, but before she can pull her hand from Mary-Margaret's, Mary-Margaret's grip tightens and the contact remains. "I asked if you think you deserve to be happy?"
Her cheeks flush a little and she averts the other woman's eyes and once again, the ache of guilt stabs at her heart—because as much as she wants to be happy, wanting something and deserving it are two very different things. But in spite of the guilt, she nods. "I do."
"I do, too," Mary-Margaret says, grinning as Regina looks back at her. "I watched the light slowly fade out of you once. I'm so glad that I've gotten to watch it come back to you." Again, she squeezes her hand and her smile deepens, "You've earned this, Regina. You just have to decide what will make you happy, and go for it—really go for it. No one foot in and one foot out, but totally and completely in because that's the only way you're going to really enjoy it and you owe it to yourself to enjoy it."
"I thought you said you weren't going to give me a hope speech."
"Well, sometimes I just can't help myself," Mary-Margaret says with a soft chuckle. "And this one was free of charge."
Regina laughs and covers her other hand over Mary-Margaret's. She takes a long breath and swallows hard, pushing away painful memories of Leopold and of Cora, the doubt that Rumplestiltskin planted in her subconscious and the blame she placed on her own shoulders for the cards that life dealt her.
"What if…"
"No. No doubting," Mary-Margaret interjects. "There's no hope in doubt."
With a nod, Regina inhales a sharp breath as she looks back to the page and she can't help but think of what a constant he's been in her life—even when he was just a possibility. He'd never pressured her, never pushed for more than she was ready to give. When they met that first time, he'd offered her his hand and in doing so had offered her an extension of support she'd so rarely encountered. She'd actively tried to push it away, but he never wavered and he trusted her, even when she'd given him every reason not to. When they met again in Storybrooke, he'd been so patient, letting her come to terms with her feelings, patiently waiting and letting their relationship progress on her terms; and when things became truly complicated, instead of backing away, he'd adjusted his entire life to fit into hers.
He was everything she'd never had, everything she'd always wanted.
She finds him in the kitchen, staring skeptically at the food-processer as he rolls a blueberry against the cutting board. She pushes herself into the kitchen and takes a short breath before smiling as she watches him, always finding his struggles with modernity terribly endearing. Leaning up on her toes, she kisses his cheek, laughing as it startles him and brings him into the moment with her.
"I didn't hear you come in," he says, turning toward her as his hand slips around her waist.
Her breath catches and she grins, her stomach fluttering with nervously excited anticipation. "I'm going to ask you something and I want you to give me an honest answer."
"Okay," he says, tipping his head in curiosity.
"Do you want to marry me?"
"Regina…"
"Answer the question. You said you would."
"I thought we talked through this this morning."
"We did," she's quick to say. "But I think it's a topic that deserves…revisiting."
Robin's palm presses into the small of her back as draws her closer, smiling sweetly as he leans in and kisses her cheek. "I love you and I'm happy with the life we're sharing together."
"But is it enough?" She asks, catching her bottom lip between her teeth. "Could you be happier?" He offers her an exasperated sigh in reply as his fingers rub absently against the silky fabric of her shirt. "So, I'm going to ask again—do you want to marry me?" He blinks a few times and she can see him hesitating. "Please?"
"Fine," he says slowly, his eyes locked into hers. "The answer is…yes. Yes, I want to marry you."
"Okay, then," she breathes out as a slow smile stretches across her lips. "Then let's do it. Let's get married."
"Regina, you don't have to…"
"I know," she interjects, suddenly feeling so sure of her choice. "That's why I want to."
"You…want to?"
"I want to marry you, too." His smile explodes, stretching across his lips and shining through his eyes. "I want to marry you, Robin," she tells him again as he pulls her up against him, lifting her in his arms. Her arms link around his shoulders and she laughs out, burying her face in the crook of his neck as he spins her.
He sets her down on the counter and the back of her fingers rub over his stubbly cheek, her heart feeling light as he leans in to kiss her. His tongue parts the seam of her lips and his hand tangles in her hair, as her arms fold around him, drawing him closer as they lose themselves in the kiss.
She's dizzy as she pulls back and her cheeks flush when he leans back in, recapturing her lips between his as he pulls her up against his chest. She smiles against his mouth and her hand slowly pushes between them, breaking the kiss. He blinks at her a couple of times, watching as she slides off the counter and takes his hand. His fingers fold around hers as she leads him through the kitchen.
"As much as I would love to see where this goes…"
"I think it's pretty obvious where it's going."
Again, her cheeks flush and she takes a breath, "Eventually, maybe, but there's something we need to do first." His eyebrows arch and she leads him toward the living room, stopping just shy of the entrance way. "I've wasted a lot of time trying to figure out what I want and you've been so patient and wonderful and…" She shrugs. "I don't want to waste anymore time."
She waves her hand and for a moment, all either of them can see is purple. But when she smoke settles, they're wearing new clothes—him in a suit and tie, her in a cream-colored dress. He looks around them and the living room door slowly opens and the scent of roses consumes them. She watches as he takes it in—the flowers and candles, a glowing fire in the hearth and Mary-Margaret standing before it. A few close friends are seated in linen-wrapped chairs—David, with Neal on his lap, Killian and Emma beside them and on the opposite side of the aisle the Merry Men. Slowly, he looks back at her and when he does, she cans see that there are tears in his eyes.
"You…did all of this?"
"I had some help."
"We're ready when you are," Henry says as he comes down the stairs with his siblings—Henry and Roland wear matching ties with roses pinned to their lapels and Ellie is wearing a new dress and there is a flower clipped in her hair. Regina smiles at the three of them, all wearing broad excited smiles—and for a moment, she can't help but think how proud she is that they're hers.
Robin takes a breath and she sees it catch at the back of his throat. "I've never been more ready," he answers quietly as he leans in and kisses her cheek. Henry, Roland and Ellie proceed into the living room as his lips linger against her cheek, his warm breath against her lips as he gives her hand a soft squeeze. "You…really want this?" He asks once more as his eyes meet hers.
She nods and pecks, smiling as she tugs his hand as they turn toward the living room, laughing as Ellie plucks a petal from Henry's rose and bites into it, her face immediately scrunching as she spits it out and then plucks another.
"I really do," she says, as she offers him her arm, and together they walk down the aisle—and for the first time, she feels as if she's really on solid ground.
Regina cuddles closer and presses her lips to his bare chest. His arm folds around her, holding her close to him as his fingers trail slowly up and down the length of her spine. She cuddles closer and sighs, sated and content, as she listens to the rhythmic beat of his heart.
Her hand rubs absently against his chest and thin gold band around her finger catches her eye, eliciting yet another smile as she thinks back to the small, intimate ceremony that evening, when they'd stood together in front of their closest friends and family and said their vows, committing themselves to one another. They'd said the traditional vows—for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer—yet, they'd seemed so personal, so fitting. Together, they'd been though it all already and they'd survived, and they were stronger because of it.
Mary-Margaret had pronounced them married at the end of it, and they'd kissed—not just in a quick, celebratory way, but in a way that was wrought with emotion, in a way that made her weak in the knees and made her heart flutter with lightness, in a way that made her know that everything was going to be okay, simply because they had each other. There had been a time when that feeling would have frightened her, a time when she'd look for something to ground her and bring her back to reality; but that time had passed and with him, she was more than willing to embrace the unknown of what was to come—as long as they had each other.
"Do you feel different?" She murmurs, tilting her head up and resting her chin on his chest. He reaches out and runs his fingers though the front of her hair, tucking it behind her ear and slowly letting his fingers fall to her cheek. Grinning, she turns her cheek in his hand, nuzzling against his palm as she kisses his fingers. "Do we feel different?"
"Because we're married now?"
"Yeah…"
He takes a breath and caresses his thumb over the curve of her chin. "I…don't know," he tells her as a grin tugs at one corner of his mouth. "I think we still feel like us."
"I think so, too," she murmurs, as she leans back in and drops another kiss on his chest. "I'm glad we don't' feel different." She grins as her eyes cast upward to meet this. "Because I like us."
He chuckles softly as he hugs her closer. "What changed you mind? This morning you were so sure."
"I wasn't sure this morning," she tells him as her hand rubs absently against his shoulder. "This morning was…a reaction. And, I've spent so much of my life reacting to things, letting my past decide my future." She pauses. "And then I realized that wasn't fair—not to you, not to our family, not to me." Taking a breath, she feels her smile forming as thinks about the life they've built together. "We deserve better than that and I was tired of standing in the way."
He leans down and kisses her hair. "Just having you was always enough," he murmurs as his fingers swirl between her shoulder blades. "Though, I can't say I'm not thrilled about this recent turn of events, you had always been enough."
She lifts her head and smiles faintly, the panic she'd felt that morning seeming like such a distant memory. Drawing herself up, she pushes herself up and hovers over him, her smile deepening as she takes his lips in hers, offering him a kiss that's soft and sweet, and full of love and gratitude. His hands continue to wander over her, swirling and caressing over warm skin, as they kiss; and when she pulls back, his lips settle on her neck.
"We should have taken Emma up on her offer…"
He laughs against her skin, pulling away as his eyebrow arches, "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah," she says, grinning as his eyes glitter. "It might have been nice to have the house all to ourselves tonight…and tomorrow morning."
"We still have hours before Ellie wakes up."
"Yeah," she nods, catching her bottom lip between her teeth. "And it will be nice having a breakfast with them—our first official family breakfast."
"We've always been a family," he says, grinning as he drops a kiss against her forehead. "I'm not supposed to tell you, but the boys are making us waffles—breakfast in bed."
"I'm glad you did," she says, her eyes widening.
But before she can continue with the thought, Robin reaches around her and pulls an envelope from the nightstand. "Oh, I almost forgot," he murmurs as he hands her the envelope. "This came today."
Her eyebrow arches curiously and turns in his arms so that she's sitting beside him up against the pillows. "Wedding present?"
Robin shakes his head, "I think it's from Zelena, and since it's addressed to both of us, I figured we'd open it together."
"Oh…"
"Sorry to…kill the mood," he murmurs as her finger lifts the flap and she wonders if her sister will manage to sour a perfectly wonderful evening. "But since we were drifting toward the topic of uncomfortable surprises, I…"
"…was reminded." She sighs and unfolds the letter and Robin's arm slides tight around her shoulders, and together they scan the contents of Zelena's letter.
"She's…leaving," Robin murmurs after a few minutes have passed. "She's going back to Oz?"
"Yeah," Regina nods, looking over at him. "Ellie is…all ours."
A slow smile stretches over his lips, "She's always been ours."
Regina nods and looks back to the green ink on the parchment, "She thinks that you and I are Ellie's best chance. I just…can't believe after…" She shakes her head as her voice trails off. Folding up the letter and tucking it back into the envelope. "Well, regardless, this possibly the first sensible thing she's ever said."
"About this situation? It definitely is."
"I know we'd already decided that this was it, but I'm glad she ultimately made the choice and not us."
"Today is just full of all sorts of wonderful surprises," he tells her as he presses a kiss against her temple. She cuddles into his side and stretches her arm across his abdomen, hugging herself closer to him. He kisses her again before resting his head atop hers. "Are you okay?" He asks after awhile. "I know how much you wanted to save her relationship with Ellie."
She takes a breath and nods, "Yeah, I'm fine, and I think I wanted it for all the wrong reasons."
"I don't know about that," he murmurs back. She lifts her head and looks at him, her eyes searching his as she thinks of all they've endured—together and apart—at Zelena's hand, and she wonders how he can be so forgiving—not just of Zelena, but of her. "You know," he begins, as a smile stretches over his lips. "Earlier today, you asked me why I wanted to marry Marian."
"I remember," she says with a nod.
"But you never asked why I wanted to marry you."
She blinks a couple of times, watching as his blue eyes glimmer like he has a secret that he just can't wait to tell. She grins as he turns to her, reaching out and tucking a few straying strands of hair behind her ear. His fingers comb through her hair, grazing against her cheek.
"I told you that I liked who I was when I was with her." She nods, remembering. "I wanted to get something right when I married her, but I didn't always live up to that—to the man I should have been, the man I wanted to be—not even after we married, not after Roland…" His voice trails off for a moment and she knows the painful memories to which he's referring. Reaching out, she brushes her fingers against his cheek both in comfort and understanding. "And with you, I've finally gotten that something right."
"A second chance."
"Yeah," he murmurs as he pulls her hand away from his face, kissing her palm before his fingers lace through hers. "I've spent my whole life looking for adventure, looking for a place where I belonged, and that always seemed so contradictory, so elusive." Taking breath, he smiles. "And then I met you and…"
"Everything just fell into place."
"Exactly," he says with a nod. "You're home to me, Regina—you and the kids—you're home, and every day when I wake up, I just can't wait to see what new adventure the day will bring us."
She feels her breath catch in her throat and a swell of emotion rises in her chest—and suddenly, she's at a loss for words. With tears welling in her eyes, she leans in and captures his lips between hers. Her tongue swirls imploringly around his as his hands find her hips and he shifts her into his lap. She pulls back for a moment, letting the blanket fall away from her as she rests her forehead against his, watching as licks his lips in anticipation of what's to come. Leaning back in, she closes the gap between them, smiling against his mouth as she thinks of all of the adventures the future will bring them, assured that wherever life take them, they'll go together and they'll always be home.