It's been two weeks. Frank hasn't talked to Gerard since the night they made love. He's been worried. He's talked to Mikey and Ray, asking them if they've heard anything from him. Ray and Mikey have tried calling him several times a week but no answers. This has only made him worry more. He decided to call Lindsey.

"Hello."

"Hey Lindsey, it's Frank."

"I know. What do you need?."

"I need you to see Gerard."

"No."

"Lindsey please. He needs someone. Ray's been busy and Mikey's been taking care of Alicia."

"What happened to Alicia?."

"She fell down that stairs two weeks ago."

"Oh god, that's awful. And you?."

"I can't see him."

"Why not?."

"It's, not important. Look, please do this, if not for him for me. It'll make me feel better. Nobody can get in touch with him. He won't answer his phone or anything. I don't know if he's okay or not."

"Frank I don't want to sound cruel but I can't do that. I can't risk him hurting me or Bandit."

"It was an error in judgement. He feels horrible Lindsey. He won't eat or sleep. And a couple of weeks ago me and Mikey went over and he was gone. We found drawings, horrible drawings. And crumpled up suicide notes. He was okay thank god but at that time I could still see him and talk to him." He was welling up at the thought. "He needs to see you. He needs to see Bandit too. Just, please. He started cutting himself and I'm worried he'll keep doing it. or worse." She was silent for a few seconds, thinking.

"Okay. I will. But you're coming with me."

"Lindsey I can't co-"

"You're coming with me." She demanded.

"I -sigh- fine."...

o~O~o

"Where are we going Mommy?." Bandit asked as they pulled out of their new driveway the next day.

"We're gonna go see Daddy."

"REALLY? YAAYYYY!." Lindsey half-smiled at her daughter's enthusiasm. She missed him just as much as Bandit did. But she was afraid. Afraid of being hurt by a man she thought could never do such a thing. Who normally wouldn't. Soon she arrived at Frank's. Jamia asked where he was going. "To Mikey's, I want to see how Alicia's doing." He lied. He stepped in the car and greeted the two.

"So you gonna tell me why you can't see Gerard without Big Brother laying the smack-down on you?." He glared at her remark.

"Something happened two weeks ago. She wasn't to pleased."

"Well what happened?."

"Um...Nunya."

"I can turn this f-cking car around ya know."

"NO MOMMY!." Bandit yelled from the backseat. They forgot she was in the car.

"Fine! Me and Gerard, we um...DO I HAVE TO? It's embarrasing."

"What did y'all do, f-ck?" She joked. He was silent. he looked to his feet. A few seconds passed when she gasped. "OH MY GOD Y'ALL DID IT?!." She said with wide eyes, then began laughing hysterically.

"I, uh, meh." He answered awkwardly. She continued to laugh for a minute or so then caught her breath.

"So -whoo- So Jamia wasn't to please with this huh?."

"Not in the slightest. I can't even talk to him on the phone."

"Now that's a little extreme." She exclaimed. He nodded in agreement. "So..." Lindsey said as the conversation dimmed. A minute passed when she spoke again. "Didja like it?." She asked with a smirk. He smiled back sarcastically and flipped her off. She made a biting move towards his finger, he moved it away quickly.

They arrived soon. Lindsey quickly reached for Bandit's arm but she was too quick and ran for the door. "DAADDDYYYY! Open the door Daddy!."

"Bandit calm down!." Lindsey shouted sternly. She and Frank walked to the door to join Bandit and knocked a few times, waiting.

"F-ck this sh-t." Frank said, grabbing his key.

"Don't curse Frankie! It's bad!." Bandit yelled up at him. "YEEAAAHHHHH." Lindsey mocked towards him, grinning. He stuck his tongue out and opened the door. They yelled for him but just like Frank and Mikey's visit he never showed. Frank immediately thought the worst and told Lindsey and Bandit to stay put as he roamed the house in search for Gerard. He entered the bathroom in Gerard's bedroom as part of the search and couldn't believe what he saw. He gasped and put his hand over his mouth, beginning to cry. What lay in the bathtub was Gerard,
unconsious, bleeding everywhere. He had cut his wrists open. The water filling the tub was plaguing with the dark maroon liquid that spilled from his wrists. Lindsey came in soon, naturally disobeying Frank's orders. She widened her eyes and dropped to her knees, hands over her mouth like Frank. She cried as Frank called 911. Bandit ran up and Lindsey picked her up and carried her out, against her will. Frank took some shirts out of Gerard's dresser and wrapped them around his wrists.

"Where's Daddy?! I wanna see Daddy!." She protested.

"No baby, You can't see Daddy right now." She choaked, barely managing to speak. She paused and sat in the middle of the of the staircase, holding Bandit tightly, weeping. Bandit cried now too.

"Where's Daddy? What's, wrong with Da-addy?." She cried. Lindsey didn't answer, she just held Bandit in her arms. Frank ran down after them. He sat next to Lindsey and hugged her.
He cried as well.

"I called 911. They'll be here any minute now." He pulled back and gently grabbed Lindsey's chin, facing her towards him. "He's going to be alright." He assured her slowly. But she was convinced he was gone. He felt the same in a way but he was known for having faith. Gerard liked that about him. 911 arrived shortly and Lindsey struggled to cover Bandit's eyes as the medics rushed his pale body to the gurney, but failed. He was dripping water, the shirts that covered his wrists had fell and he was pouring blood once more, covered with nothing but a blanket the medics carried. Bandit looked and turned away, wailing into her mothers arms. "Daddy." she cried repeatedly.

"Will he be alright?." Frank asked quickly.

"We can't be sure. We have to get him to the hospital A.S.A.P." One of the medics said as he shut ambulance the door. Lindsey drove to the hospital far behind the ambulance with Frank and Bandit. Frank decided to sit in the back and comfort the crying 4 year old.

"Am i -sniffles- gonna see Daddy again?."

"Of course you are baby." He said, kissing her on the forehead. He wasn't sure though. They pulled in and rushed to the counter, explaining what happened and who they were looking for.
The woman behind the counter called a nurse who was involved with his case. She said she didn't have any information on his condition, but assured them the hospital did have blood in his type. But whether or not he would live was still unknown to her. Lindsey thanked the nurse and the three sat in the waiting area. Then Frank got a call. It was Jamia of course.

"Frank where are you? Why have you been there so long?."

"Because I was never going to his in the first place."

"You went to see Gerard."

"Yes."

"Frank what the f-ck?! I told you not to go around him anymore."

"Well did you ever consider that maybe you aren't the f-cking boss of me?." He said sternly as he went outside. It was very cold. He could see his breath.

"EXCUSE ME?!."

"Jamia he tried to kill himself. And he might have succeeded." She went silent. "I don't know how you can expect not to see my best friend anymore. We're in a band Jamia. We're going to see eachother at some point."

"With the guys around. Either way weren't you guys thinking about kicking him out?."

"How could we kick him out? What gave you that idea?." She didn't answer. "-sigh- I went to his house with Lindsey and Bandit. I convinced her to go see him but she said I had to come with.
He cut his wrists open. And we don't know if he's okay or not. We're at the hospital." He paused to take a hit from the cigarette he lit when he went outside. "There was blood everywhere Jamia." Lindsey walked out and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned and she gestured him to come inside. "I have to go. I'll see you when I get home okay?"

"Okay."

"I'm sorry that I lied to you baby. I really am but I had to see him and make sure he was okay. Obviously he wasn't."

"I understand. Bye, I love you."

"I love you too." He followed Lindsey inside. "What's up? Did you hear anything about him?." He asked.

"Yeah. They have enough to get him back to a healthy blood amount. They're pumping it in through and I.V. now." She said with a smile through her tears. He smiled back. They sat at the hospital for about around 40 minutes. A nurse came out to them and said he was awake if they wanted to speak to him. They sprung up and followed her to his room. Lindsey and Bandit went in first. He saw them and smiled as much as his tired muscles could manage.

"Hi baby." He spoke weakly to his daughter.

"Hi Daddy." She sat next to him on his bed.

"I missed you so much baby." He said, hugging her with one arm, pulling her closer. She hugged him as tight as she could. Tears began to run down his cheeks. He still smiled.

"I missed you too. I love you Daddy." She said, kissing him on the cheek, hugging him. He started to cry more as he held his daughter for the first time in months. Lindsey smiled down, crying lightly. She held his hand. "I love you too sweetheart."He released Bandit and grabbed Lindsey's hand with both of his.

"I love you so much Lindsey. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm so sorry. I'll never do it again. Please give me another chance. I promise I'll never lay another hand on you." He pleaded to her. She stared at him more a moment. She thought of everything that's happened. She almost lost him. He hurt her but she couldn't imagine living without him. She smiled.

"Okay baby. I will. I've missed you." She smiled ear to ear now, he smiled wider too and pulled her closer to hug her. When the hug was done she stepped back and Frank went to him and rubbed his arm and hand. He leaned down closer to him.

"Hey Frank." Gerard smiled.

"Hey Gerard." He said with a slight half smile. He stopped rubbing and grabbed his hand, holding him. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let Jamia control me like that."

"It's okay Frank. I understand. You didn't want to lose your family." He smiled. Frank stood.

"No, It's not okay. I can't believe I let this happen to you."

"Frank. I'm not your responsibilty. You can't feel bad about this. It isn't your fault." Though Gerard tried to comfort his friend it wasn't working. "Frank, what can i do to help you understand That this isn't your fault?." Frank stopped pacing and turned to Gerard.

"Nothing." He said. Gerard rolled his eyes.

"You know what I'm just gonna go, call Mikey mk?." Lindsey stated awkwardly, grabbing Bandit and leaving the room. Gerard watched them leave the room then looked back at Frank.

"Gerard." He said, stepping closer to him. "You need to promise that you will never, ever, do this again." He said as he grasped Gerard's hand again, tightly now. Gerard looked in his eyes.

"I promise I will never do it again." He said slowly.

"Swear it."

"I swear." He smiled. Frank smiled back, leaning closer to his friend. Gerard moved up and tried to kiss Frank, and Frank leaned in for a minute but right before their lips touched, he pulled back. Gerard didn't speak but the look in his eyes said he was sorry.

"It's okay." Frank smiled at Gerard. Gerard smiled back. Lindsey opened the door.

"Gerard, Mikey wants to talk to you." She said handing him her phone. They talked for a bit while Frank and Lindsey sat outside the room. Frank looked over at her and saw her wiping tears from her face. He rubbed her arm.

"Hey. Why are you crying? He's okay." He asked.

"That's not the point. I'm glad he's okay but, I never thought he would do this." She said, looking at the floor, then through the window on Gerard's hospital door. She stood to look through better. She saw him on the phone with Mikey. He looked sad, in a guilty way. Mikey was upset. And terrified. Gerard looked and saw Lindsey and half-smiled as his brother talked, well, yelled at him. Mikey was furious. But not with Gerard. With the situation. The idea that his big brother wanted to take his own life killed Mikey. She smiled back. She sat back down next to Bandit and held her hand, pulling her into the hug. She hugged her mom back. "I love you baby." "I love you too Mommy." Frank smiled widely at the two. Lindsey turned and noticed him and raised an eyebrow.

"The f-ck you lookin' at shorty?." She joked. He opened his mouth to reply but was interrupted by an object hitting the door. He opened it and saw Gerard had thrown his pillow at the door.

"I've been yelling for y'all!." He said with a laugh. "Now hand me my f-cking pillow and come here." He laughed again. Frank did as he asked. Gerard grabbed the pillow from Frank and asked him to tell Lindsey to come here. He did and she pulled a chair from across the hospital room to his bed and sat.

"Hey baby." She said, holding his hand again.

"Hey." He smiled, rubbing her cheek. "Can I ask you a question?."

"Of course baby." She said. "What is it?."

"Can you." He paused to giggle. "Can you please go to my house and bring me some clothes." He said with a smile, trying not to laugh. She couldn't help but giggle.

"Alright baby." She rose and walked away, then turned and kissed him on the lips lightly. Then left.

Authors note: Sorry about the incredibly long chapter. I have yet to mention that I in no way think that Jamia is as much of, well a b-tch as I describe her in this story. Hope you enjoyed it.
Chapter 8 will be here shortly.