A/N: Hey, guys! Thanks so much for the reviews for the last chapter. Hope you like this one as well.
As usual, nothing belongs to me. Just having a little fun with the characters.
For W, because she makes me happy.
Mine to Love Again
Chapter 6: Finally
Ashley's POV
I have no idea why having her holding me close broke me. I don't know if it's the fact that it's been so long, the feel of her body pressing against mine, her warmth or just the fact that she is finally talking to me. Whatever it is, I'm sobbing brokenly in her arms as she held me tighter and ran her hands up and down my back in a soothing manner.
I can feel her body shaking a little, so I know she is crying as well. This is so not what I had envisioned our reunion to be like. There's been too much drama in our lives already. Could it be that we're both so full of emotions that they finally broke lose? What do these tears mean? Why did they come just now, after so long?
I couldn't tell you how long we stood there, just holding each other. Even when the tears stopped, we just held on to each other for dear life. Her scent surrounded me and made me feel weak in the knees. It was still a scent I remember from before, so that hadn't changed. She felt so good in my arms I could have died happy right then.
I felt her arms loosen from my back as she leaned back a little. I was glad she didn't let go completely and just looked at me as I rested my hands on her shoulders. I wasn't sure what to say to her. Having her this close afforded me the opportunity to take in her features and admire just how much more beautiful she had gotten. She looked a little older, but that only added to her beauty. Her bright blue eyes were sparkling and her lashes were still wet from her tears. I noticed she was looking back at me just as intently so I didn't say anything and just let her look all she wanted.
Before I could say anything, her arms fell from my body, so I took mine from her shoulders and took a step back, fearing the worst. She surprised me by taking my hand and leading me to a small sitting area on the balcony I had not noticed before. It was at the end of it and away from the door and prying eyes. It just occurred to me that most of the guest could have probably seen us and were probably wondering what was going on. Not that I cared, but I wasn't sure if she did or not.
I sat on one of the comfortable chairs and she did the same. We faced each other for a few minutes in silence, neither in a hurry to speak. It surprised me that it was a comfortable silence between two people that knew each other well and didn't feel a need to jump right into conversation. I still wasn't sure who would speak first, or what should be said.
"It's good to see you again, Indie," I finally said softly.
She smiled a little at the nickname. "It's good to see you, too, Pete."
I chuckled at the old nickname no one knew about but us. "Never gonna let me live that one down, are you, Spence?"
"Why would I? It was classic!"
"It was embarrassing! I mean, your mom answers the phone you were supposed to answer and I have to pretend to be some guy named Pete. I mean, seriously, Spence, I don't think she bought it."
"I thought it was cute as hell that you did that so I wouldn't get in trouble because I wasn't supposed to be talking to you."
"There was no way I could make things worse for you. You've always been able to unnerve me, to make me lose my cool. No one else has ever been able to make me react the way you do," I confess while looking down at my hands.
She didn't say anything for a while and I waited in silence. I looked down at my toes as if they were the most interesting things on this planet. Several minutes later, she finally broke the silence.
"I don't even know where to begin, Ash. It's been so long that I don't know if we're the same people anymore."
"I know," I tell her while looking back up at her. "I'd like to explain some things to you. Get this all out of my chest. Ask you to forgive me for leaving when I did."
"I know why you did it, Ash. I know you felt like you were doing the right thing. Maybe you did, maybe you didn't, but it happened and now here we are, four years later and almost strangers."
"I'm still me, Indie. If anything is different is that I've made some positive changes in the last four years. I've gotten better about a lot of things. But deep down inside, I'm still the girl you once loved and all I want from you at this point is for you to let me back into your life as a friend. I know I can't ask for more than that and I've come to terms with it."
She took a deep breath and ran her hands through her blonde locks while looking away from me.
"Do you really think it's possible for us to be just friends, Ashley?"
"I hope so. It's how we started."
"I'm sorry for keeping you waiting this long. I know you've wanted to talk to me for a long time and I didn't let it happen," she said surprising the hell out of me.
"I guess I also know why you did it. I broke your heart and it's okay that you don't trust me anymore. I have no one to blame but myself."
"I know you wanted us to talk in peace, and this is not the place. Do you want to leave and go to the loft?"
Again, she managed to surprise me and I was quiet for too long because she came to the wrong conclusion.
"Never mind. I know you might not want to go back there after so long."
I snapped out of it quickly. "I'd love to go with you. You surprised me with the invite, is all."
"Let's go say goodbye then. It's been a long week and I think we have more to talk about."
I followed her back into the apartment and we went around for a few minutes saying goodbye to the host and some of the guests. I finally reached our friends while Spencer was talking to Sasha.
"We're leaving," was all I said before smiles covered each of their faces. Kyla even manages a tiny squeal, which made me chuckle.
"You go, chica! Finally!"
"Don't get so excited, Mads. We're just going to her place to talk about things."
"That is still a huge step," Chelsea reminded me. "I know nothing might be solved tonight, but at least you'll be talking about it and clearing the air."
"Just be honest with her, Ash," Kyla told me as she gave me a hug. "We all know you guys love each other still. Just give her some time and I'm sure you'll find your way back to each other soon."
"Thank you, Ky. I hope you find love soon as well," I whispered in her ear. "Open up your mind to the possibilities life throws your way unexpectedly."
Kyla leaned back in my arms and looked at me strangely. "What do you mean by that?"
"You'll find out soon enough, I hope."
She frowned at me, but I just kissed her forehead, winked at Madison and made my way out the door. I took the elevator down and went to stand by the front of Spencer's SUV to wait for her. I didn't want her to feel weird about us leaving the apartment together and I certainly didn't want anyone talking about it.
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Spencer's POV
I watch as Ashley leaves the apartment and Sasha's eyes follow as well.
"Are you going to go after her or are you done talking?"
"We're actually leaving together. We're going to the loft to talk some more. There's more privacy there."
"How are you feeling now that you're finally speaking to her again? I noticed the embrace from before."
I blushed. "I felt the urge to hug her and the moment I did, she started crying. I don't know how long we were hugging for, but it felt nice."
"Don't worry about people noticing too much. The guys were playing again and we did a little impromptu karaoke, if you will. Besides, it was dark out there and hard to see who it was. The people here tonight are not known for being gossipy, so don't worry about it getting out."
"That's good to know. I don't want her to go through the usual media circus."
"I won't keep you any longer. Go say bye to your friends and I'll see you bright and early Monday morning."
After exchanging a quick hug with her, I walked over to my friends, who were all looking expectantly at me.
"Ash is waiting downstairs for you," Kyla tells me. "Please, Spence, be nice to her. She's pretty broken right now. I could see it in her eyes."
"I don't plan on hurting her, Ky. We talked for a bit already and we're doing fine. We just want to finish talking at my place and put this all behind us."
"Does that mean you're getting back together?" Chelsea said anxiously. "Cause we'd all be supportive of it."
"No. We're just going to try the friend thing and see what happens."
Madison rolled her eyes at me. "Ay, Dios mio! You do know you're madly in love with each other still, right?"
"I'm not going there with you, Mads. How about I take care of my business and you take care of yours? Last time I checked, there's something you need to deal with," I told her with a raised eyebrow and a quick look Kyla's way and saw her pale under her tan.
"What is she talking about, Maddy?" Kyla asked while Chelsea looked on amused. Apparently she had clued in as well.
"Nothing. Spence, Ashley's been waiting too long on your ass. Get moving, chica."
"Yeah. I'm going."
I kissed all of them goodbye and left the apartment. The moment I stood alone in the elevator, my heart started pounding. I was going to be alone with her for goddess knew how long and I didn't know how I was going to handle myself. I don't remember the last time I was this nervous.
As I reached the parking area, I saw her leaning back against my SUV and took a moment to admire her beauty. There was no denying it; Ashley Davies was truly a sight to behold.
"I was afraid you had changed your mind," she told me as I got closer.
"Sorry. I was held back by our friends giving me instructions for tonight," I said with a chuckle.
"Hmm, they got on my case as well. Meddlesome bunch. Remind me again why we're friends with them?"
"Cause they love us!" I said as I unlocked the doors and we got in.
She took a couple of minutes to admire the car as we put our seat belts on. "How do you like the car?"
"I honestly love it. I don't know if I ever thanked you for it properly."
"No need to. I wanted you to be happy. I know you always liked this SUV."
"I almost didn't take it, but then our friends all got on my case and I caved in. It's a wonderful ride and I could never thank you enough for all you've done for me, Ash. I realize now I held on to my anger for longer than necessary. I think I got too comfortable in my pity party and ignored the nice things you kept doing for me even when we weren't together."
"I wanted to make sure you finished your schooling because I know just how smart you are and I wanted you to have that opportunity. The car was a present to celebrate your accomplishments and the loft was something Kyla and I decided on together because we didn't have a need for it. We really like the beach house."
"Like I said, you've done too much for me, Pete."
"I like to think that you've done a hell of a lot more for me and I'll never be able to repay you for it."
I looked at her in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"You saved me from myself, Indie. I was spinning out of control when I met you and you helped me get better. When dad died and I started acting like an idiot, you were there. When I was confused about Aiden, you forgave me. I've stopped drinking, smoking and using shit all because of you. Because I wanted you to feel proud that I was a better person. No one ever made such an impact in my life and for that alone I'll be grateful forever."
Tears filled my eyes as I listened to her heart-felt words. "I knew you were special from the moment I met you, Pete. You just needed to trust in yourself and go for your dreams. If I helped in any way, then I'm happy."
The rest of the way was made in silence, but it wasn't awkward at all. I think finding our way back to each other wasn't going to be as hard as I had thought.
As hard as it was to accept, she was still Ashley. My Ashley.
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Madison's POV
After Ash and Spence left, we hung out a little longer before we decided we were ready to leave. Right before we left, one of Ashley's band members called Chelsea and she went to talk to him for a few minutes while Kyla excused herself to go to the bathroom. I was sipping on a glass of champagne when Chelsea came back to tell me that Rocco had asked her out for a drink and she had accepted. Which meant Kyla and I were on our own and I was about to have heart failure.
It seemed most of my friends had noticed the tension around us, and not only that, but they had someone figured out how I felt about the petite brunette. I hadn't been hiding my feelings as well as I thought I had. Which sucked because they would be riding my ass until I did something about the situation.
Chelsea waited for Kyla to come back out and we said our goodbyes to Sasha. As we rode the elevator down, Chelsea kept giving me meaningful looks and tilting her head towards Kyla. Since she was checking her messages, she didn't notice, something I was grateful for and I took the opportunity to glare at Chels. I mean, she had to do this now, with Kyla so close by?
Yes, I know the three of us have been meddling with Ash and Spence the past few years, thinking we're helping, so this is no different, but fuck! It's so different when you're at the receiving end. I mean, honestly, how did they not kick our asses? 'Cause it's only been a day for me and I'm ready to snap. Could be my Latina genes, but seriously, my friends need to back the fuck off! I need to handle this on my own because I'm scared shitless as it is.
I'm so lost in thought that I don't even notice the elevator has reached the lobby until I feel a soft hand grab my own and I'm being pulled out of it. Chels is already walking away with Rocco and Kyla is pulling me towards her car. Surprisingly, she doesn't let go of my hand until we reach her car and she walks over to the passenger's side. She hits a button on the remote control in her hand and then opens the door for me. I finally look at her.
"We're going back to the beach house," she tells me in a tone that lets me know there is no use arguing about it, so I just nod.
I get in and she closes the door after me. She wastes no time coming around to the other side and I lean over and open the door for her. She smiles her thanks as she settles in and buckles her seatbelt. She gets the engine going and soon after we're on our way. Nothing is said on the way to the house, and my nerves feel so tightly wound I'm afraid they're going to snap and I'm going to end up in the emergency room instead of the beach house with her.
Wouldn't that be just so lovely? What am I supposed to say when asked what's wrong? Oh, I don't know, doc, I think she broke me! Yeah, 'cause that is going to fly so well.
"You need to relax, baby," her words suddenly penetrate through the confusion clouding my brain. "You're so tense I'm afraid you might hurt yourself."
I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Sorry," is all I manage to mumble.
"I just wish you'd tell me what's bothering you, Maddy, because it's obviously something big," she continues and places her hand on my thigh.
GAH!
Does she not know what that does to me? My muscle tenses and I'm sure she can notice it, but she doesn't remove her hand. Instead, she rubs up and down and my lungs refuse to work like they're supposed to. My heartbeats are tripping over each other like drunken fools. A swarm of killer bees are having a party in my stomach.
"Relax, baby," she murmurs and I just lean back, close my eyes and cover her hand with mine to stop it from moving.
I can't take much more of this before jumping her in the car and she is driving, for fuck's sake! Once more, she surprises me by turning her hand so our palms are touching and lacing our fingers together. She gives me a little squeeze and we make the rest of the way to the beach house in silence.
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Spencer's POV
"What's going on with Maddy and Ky?"
Ashley looks at me and smiles. "Maddy likes her."
"What's so weird about that?"
"No, Indie, she likes her. As in wants to kiss her and hold her likes her."
"Hmm, so I was reading those vibes right! When did that happen?"
"I'm not entirely sure, but it seems for a little while and it's at the point where she can't hide it anymore."
"Think she'll have the guts to tell her tonight? And how do you think Kyla is going to react?"
"I have a feeling Maddy won't be able to hide how she feels anymore. I also think Ky might surprise us all with her response to it. I think there is something there but she hasn't noticed it yet or doesn't recognize it for what it is."
"And what do you think it is?"
"I'm pretty sure Ky's had a girl crush on Madison for longer than most of us think. I mean, when we're on the road, the moment Maddy calls, her voice changes, her eyes are alight and she has this huge smile on her face. And the reason she comes back in between gigs is mostly to see her. There's been times she comes to visit and when she goes back to wherever I might be and I ask how all of you are, she tells me she only saw Madison because the rest of you were busy."
"Really now? Who would have thought, right? Because as far as I know, neither has been with a girl before. Hell, back in high school Madison was a complete ass about us."
"I've always thought those most opposed to gays and lesbians are hiding very deeply in the closet. Not saying Maddy is gay, but she's definitely gay for my sister," she finished with a smirk.
I chuckled at her words. "And how would you feel if something comes out of this?"
"It would be highly hypocritical of me if I get in the way. As long as both are happy, I'm cool with it, Indie. Mads really takes good care of Kyla. She's been doing that for a little while now and it's kind of cute."
"Figured you'd say that, Pete. I think we'd all be supportive of them."
Just then, we pulled up to the loft and I felt her tense a little next to me and take a deep breath. I guess they weren't the only ones having a deep talk that night. Ashley and I were finally going to sit and have a talk.
One that was four years in the making.
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