Authoress' Note: ...umm...hehe, hi! Guess it's kinda been a while, sorry. BUT! In our defense, school was being a bitch. I just wanna say that a history project that requires the students to create a curriculum for your class is stupid. Especially if your grade depends on how well they score on the test you made...What teacher makes you do that? We also had state testing, drama rehearsals, drama with friends, and homework (ugh, too damn much!) to worry about.
Anywho, some of you may be wondering where and when the hell this takes place in the Bleach world. We have decided that shortly after Grimmjow is defeated the gang ends up having a successful rescue mission. Ichigo never faces off against Ulquiorra and Starrk never takes Orihime. No invasion of Karakura. Please note that this is very difficult to write seeing as we are now caught up to episode 324, well past where we set the story. This means that Kazoku and Umino will know things that have not taken place yet in the Bleach world (at this point, Umino knows a considerably large amount more than Kazoku, who has only watched up to episode 165 in this fic).
So, here ya go, the Chappie cavalry proceeds!
The girls hadn't even walked two steps before they were abruptly sucked into the sterile white vortex. It was a rather disorienting experience, feeling the wind rush past their faces as they traveled at the speed of light and yet seemingly making no progress through the endless expanse of white space. Umino held on tightly to Kazoku's hand, both fearing the thought of getting separated.
After what felt like ages of wandering through nothing, the space around them shattered in an instant and they were surrounded by clear blue sky. The speed at which they had been moving coupled with their return to reality had enough force to wrench Kazoku and Umino apart. Both girls began to scream as they fell through the sky, not knowing which way was up or down.
Time seemed to drag on as the two plummeted towards the ground. They yelled until their throats went dry, only for them to take a breath and start again. This repeated for a while until they realized that they were still falling and still nowhere near the ground.
"Umino?" Kazoku called over the rushing wind.
"What?"
"We've been falling for a while, huh?"
"...Yeah."
"Umino?"
"What?"
"We're gonna die if we hit the ground, right?"
"...Yeah."
"Oh."
Kazoku frowned, curling her toes to keep her flip flops on her feet. She reached into her pocket, pulling out the tiny button. The ground was nearing now, and Umino had drawn her knees to her chest, eyes closed, preparing herself for the impact. Kazoku looked from Umino to the box and back again.
'We're falling to our deaths... And I'm staring at a button.'
Wondering why she wasted so much time being a space case, Kazoku pressed the button. What did she have to lose?
The tiny box buzzed and sparked suddenly, causing her to screech and drop it. It fell faster than she did ('That's not supposed to happen. We're supposed to fall at the same rate.' Kazoku pondered absentmindedly) and hit the center of a walled street. An Urahara logo unfolded beneath them.
The two girls hit the logo and it sunk before catapulting them back into the air. Soon after, Kazoku landed on the center of the logo, legs crossed and smile stretching from ear to ear. Umino however, had uncurled and landed awkwardly, backside in the air while her face made acquaintance with what she now recognized as an air mattress.
. . . A giant, four foot tall air mattress bearing Urahara's face across the expanse of the surface.
Umino quickly righted herself so that she was sitting with her legs stretched out in front of her, glasses askew (they had, miraculously, not fallen off) with a dazed and disoriented expression on her face. She straightened her glasses and began to scan her surroundings analytically. Judging from the architectural style of the buildings around them, they were still in Japan. The area looked familiar, but was still too old-fashioned to be Karakura Town. Umino's brain finally put the pieces together.
"He didn't..." She murmured.
Suddenly, an alarm went off and a wave of black butterflies flew overhead as a voice boomed, "Ryoka in the Seireitei. All squads to their respective stations. I repeat, ryoka in the Seireitei. All squads to their respective stations." Umino sighed. 'If I ever see that idiot again, I won't hesitate to kill him.' An amused giggle interrupted Umino's murderous thoughts.
"Hehe, Umino. Watch this."
Kazoku jumped up and down a few times before launching herself high into the air. Flipping expertly, she landed with her feet sinking into the right eye of the image beneath them.
"I'm jumping on his face." She announced, hopping about and flipping every which way on the mattress. All the while she was singing "Crack, crack, crack! Let's break his nose! Fracture skull plates, snap the bones!" as she brought her heels down hard in her landings, lifting Umino off the mattress a good three feet with each jump. Umino's face was that of indifference while thoughts tumbled through her head. She paid no attention to the shinigami gathering around the mattress.
"Are... Are these the ryoka?"
"I think so..."
"They're unarmed... You sure?"
"Hell if I know."
The murmurs continued until a cry of surprise arose, caused by a flying chibi. The curly haired menace landed in a crouching position, eyes fixed on a hell butterfly above her. The shinigami around her took a few steps back as she jumped, missing the otherworldly insect. "Hehe, pretty butterfly." She giggled, jumping on the tips of her toes to swat at it. One brave soul stepped forward and drew his sword (bless the poor bastard...).
"Stand down ryoka!" he ordered, pointing the blade at her. She paid no attention, instead following the butterfly around in a circle. This of course bruised the ego of the lowly shinigami, seeing as he was male with a loud, brazen exterior with said ego of fragile glass inside. And so, in attempt to redeem himself, he moved to strike at the girl, bringing his blade down on her.
The world moved in high speed as the girl seemed to finally take notice of the blade. She sidestepped with a yelp, hopped up to brush noses with her attacker, giggled as the man froze at the close proximity, and head butted him in the chest.
"Whoops! Sorry Shinigami-kun!" She said in her typical child's voice as the man hit the ground. All chances of redeeming his pride were shattered into even smaller pieces with each skip the girl took after that accursed black butterfly. Many shinigami, getting over their amusement at their harmlessly felled comrade, chased after her with drawn swords, but with the girl's fascination, she either didn't notice them or didn't seem to care until the blades neared her. Then, she screeched like a banshee and took off in a panic.
Umino watched in disbelieving awe at her sister's actions. Her friend truly was odd. However, before she could think about this further, she felt the mattress shift beneath her. Someone had crawled onto it and was slowly approaching her. Rolling her eyes, she looked at the younger shinigami taking awkward steps on the less-than-solid surface. Raising his sword, her struck her with the blade.
Or... Tried to.
Because of the unstable surface, the accuracy of the blow was next to nothing and the blade punctured the mattress beside her. Said mattress gave a hiss and began to deflate. The young man tumbled to the ground with a grunt of pain, then rolled onto his back and looked up at Umino. She sighed and leaned down from her descending seat.
"You are a failure." She said, flicking him in the forehead. Then, leaving him to untangle his blade from the material, she began walking.
'Now where did she go...?'
Her eyes searched for her little sister, but the girl was nowhere to be found. The area was filled to the brim with confused and yelling shinigami, some noticing her but unable to reach her in the chaos. Minutes passed until finally, the underlings found enough sense to organize themselves and turn their weapons on her. She froze for a moment.
'Kazoku can take care of herself.'
And with that thought in mind. She unknowingly ran in the opposite direction Kazoku had gone, with a wave of black and steel in pursuit.
XxXxXxXxX
They were everywhere. Everywhere she turned, there were gleaming swords and seas of black fabric. 'Agh, how many shinigami are here anyway?' Kazoku thought as she weaved through the confusion, ducking and hopping about as metal swiped over her head or moved before her to block her path. 'Honestly people, I'm one human girl! The swords are not necessary!'
A vaguely familiar building loomed ahead and Kazoku skidded to a stop. 'That's the twelfth, isn't it?' She thought. 'Uh uh. Not risking it, no way, no how.' She turned and began running again, diving right through the team pursuing her. After kicking a few knees and sending various shinigami toppling into each other, she burst out of the group and took off at full speed in the opposite direction of the division she would rather commit suicide than enter.
'Crazy madman probably setting traps... Meaning if I don't hide inside, I'm as good as caught...'
She soon neared the gate of another division and immediately smiled. Slowing her pace, she flattened herself to the wall, watching the shinigami swarm about the entrance.
'Thirteenth. Hm... Ukitake Juushiro, right?' She mentally mulled over her knowledge of said division. 'Golden hearted captain, two bumbling third seats, no lieutenant.' Her mind strayed and she let out a cutesy laugh. 'Candy!'
She used this childish motivation to creep past the guards with no trace save a tiny giggle that left the shinigami glancing about in confusion. The chibi had a target; those low ranking underlings had already lost. Of course, she still had yet to encounter the captains...
She kept to the shadows as best she could, but she couldn't help but slip into the sunlight when the coast was clear. It felt pleasant on her skin and brought a smile to her lips. Umino could stick to the darkness, Kazoku was perfectly content with the warm rays.
Wandering around, the young girl searched for a hiding place. Somewhere that wouldn't be too hard to get out of, but not too easy to find. Of course, she could try the typical 'hide in plain sight' tactic but that could also very well turn out to scream 'Hey, look at me! I'm right here!' These people weren't that stupid... Well, at least some of them weren't.
The division was actually very quiet; its members were probably still searching the streets for her and Umino. 'I wonder if Umino's been caught already.' She thought as she looked around. The thought was immediately caught, strangled and torn to shreds by her common knowledge. If anything, Kazoku was going down first; she knew it. Umino would probably go out screaming, clawing, and biting, whereas Kazoku would shrug, go limp, and let herself be carried off. The chase was only fun until you got caught, in her opinion. After that, struggling never does much good unless you can actually overpower your captors.
She stopped before a particularly large building and tilted her head at it, wondering what might be inside. She felt three prickling sensations at the very top of her skull, one somewhat soothing while the other two bristled and nagged at her awareness. They were strange and unfamiliar feelings, beckoning her to follow them. Before she could debate this decision, she heard voices not far off. She quickly slid the first door she saw open and slipped through, closing it just as a team ran by, yelling to each other to find the intruding 'ryoka'.
She gave a sigh of relief and looked about the room she had entered. A spacious hallway, void of life, stretched out to her right. Many doorways lined it, as well as a few hallways branching off. One of the bristling feelings shifted, moving closer to her it seemed. Preferring to avoid it, she following the one soft, warm sensation down the opposite way. The second irritating feeling moved as well, approaching the first. Then the two stopped completely right as Kazoku did, standing before a large door at the end of the vast hallway.
Kazoku looked back over her shoulder in shock as the two prickling sensations intensified, moving closer. She threw the large door open without a thought and dove in, slamming it behind her. They were coming closer, they had found her... Not a surprise, but so soon? Of course, she hadn't been taking this whole thing very seriously anyway... I mean really, she had been doing flips on a giant inflatable mattress in the street. Serious was obviously not in her character.
"Hello there."
Kazoku jumped and her eyes snapped up, meeting with gentle green ones in the midst of a soft thin face and a friendly and slightly bemused smile. "I assume you're one of the ryoka?"
"H-how did you..."
The man, currently seated before a low table sipping at steaming tea, gestured to her, indicating the clothing she currently wore. She looked down at her blue shirt and jeans and slapped a palm to her forehead. "Right." She breathed, mentally berating her stupidity. "Uh, I guess you could call me a ryoka, but I don't-" Her eyes augmented as the door she was leaning on was thrown open and she was tackled to the ground.
"Ryoka scum! How dare you try assaulting our captain!" One of her attackers accused, securing her arms behind her back while the second bowed to the white haired man. "Oi! Lemme go!" Kazoku whined, wriggling about.
"We've secured the ryoka Ukitake-taicho!" The young woman announced loudly. "Permission to escort her to th-"
"That won't be necessary Kiyone-chan, Sentarō-kun. You can let her go." Ukitake smiled. Both third-seats looked up in surprise. "B-but taicho!"
"It's alright, I'm sure she isn't here to cause any trouble." The man waved a hand, his ongoing friendly smile still in place. Kazoku glowered up at the man holding her down and pushed herself up when her arms were reluctantly released. "Jerkface." She said childishly, sticking her tongue out. The needling sensations in her skull became more pronounced at the gesture and she rubbed her forehead in response. "Ow... Don't do that..."
Juushiro's face took on a questioning expression. "Kiyone-chan, Sentarō-kun. Could you two stand guard outside?" He asked, looking up at the third seats. They exchanged glances and sighed in unison, glaring at the 'intruder'. "H-hai taicho..." The two opened the door, sending wary glances over their shoulders as the eased the door shut.
"Tea?" Juushiro offered, gesturing to the table. Kazoku sat down and shook her head. "Don't like tea. Too bitter no matter how much sugar you drown it in."
Juushiro's eyes lit up and he reached into his sleeve, pulling out a large colored lollipop. "This then?"
Kazoku's eyes widened and she snatched the candy, wasting no time unwrapping it. Ukitake's eyes were alight as she sucked on the sugary sweet. "Much better." She giggled. "Thank you Ukitake-san!" She tilted her head cutely, then focused her attention on the candy in her hand. "This is really good." She paused. "So, I guess I gotta explain why I'm here, huh? I did kinda barge in and now I'm interrupting tea time. Isn't tea time supposed to be all peaceful? But I just ran in, and then those two had to be mean and tackle me. I'm probably gonna be all bruised 'cause of them." She rubbed her shoulder and frowned. "Nyah, what a pain..."
Juushiro gave a fatherly smile as she finished off the candy, sipping at his tea ever so often until she finished. "Num." She cooed, setting the lollipop stick on a napkin. She then folded her hands on the table and exhaled. "Alright. Ask away."
"Are you in any pain?" He questioned with a frown.
Kazoku tilted her head at the unexpected question. "Hm? No, not really. I mean, I have a little migraine but it's not that big a deal. Just this fuzzy feeling in my head, right here." She pointed to the top of her head. "Most of it's kinda like little needles, but the other part is really warm and honey-like."
"I see... And where are they coming from?"
Kazoku shrugged. "Heck if I know. But I dunno, the way you looked when I walked in makes me think it's from you." She pounded a fist on her open palm. "That would explain the needles. Your subordinates don't like me, and there's two of 'em. Makes sense."
Juushiro's frown softened. "You're sensing reiatsu." He said with a tone of relief.
"Oh? Really? Is it supposed to give you headaches or is that just m-" Kazoku froze, something inside her twisting. "Uh, is there a bathroom around here? I need it, now." She clamped a hand over her mouth, her other arm moving to wrap around her stomach.
"Through that door, two down to the right." Juushiro pointed to a door to his left and she jumped up and sprinted to it, throwing it open and dashing down the hall to the bathroom. She had barely reached the toilet when her stomach convulsed and emptied it's contents into the water. "Dear God..." She choked, coughing as bile rose in her throat, burning her. She held her hair back with one hand and gripped the rim of the bowl with the other.
"Kodomo-chan?" She heard; Ukitake was standing outside the door.
She lifted her head and managed to call "I'm alright," before her stomach clenched and she coughed and vomited up the last bits of the candy. "Ugh..." Her eyes watered as she stood and wiped her mouth with a bit of toilet paper. Releasing her hair, she took a deep breath and walked to the door, opening it slowly. The captain looked down at her with concern and she gave a nervous laugh. "Uh... I changed my mind... Can I have some tea?"
Ten minutes found the two reseated at the table, Kazoku gulping down the bitter tea to rid her throat of the vile taste. "Kinda a 'pick your poison' thing." She mumbled to herself. She gave an apologetic look. "I'm really sorry, I don't know what that was all about."
"Are you sure you're alright?" Juushiro asked. She gave a small smile. "I'll be okay Otou-san." She said in a small child's voice. This drew a large smile from the man, a smile that faded to understanding when Kazoku went rigid, turning her head towards the door right before a knock resounded from it. "Come in." Ukitake called and the door slid open. A flutter of a pink kimono and a tip of a straw hat and a third person joined their table.
"Figures that the cute ones always come to you, eh Ukitake?" The man gave a hearty laugh and ruffled the girl's hair. Said girl relaxed, wrinkling her nose and smoothing her hair. "Your reiatsu feels like... Zen fountain. The kind with incense." Kazoku observed. She put a finger to her bottom lip. "Lemme guess, felt my reiatsu here?"
"Yeah, though I wasn't expecting..." The man trailed off, unsure of how to phrase it.
"A little girl?" Kazoku offered. He nodded and Kazoku giggled. "Ah well. I'm not usually what people expect, so it's okay. And besides, the reactions I'll get when I have to see the sou-taicho will be pretty fun to watch." She feigned a look of ignorance. "And who are you, taicho-kun?"
"Kyouraku Shunsui. And you?"
She put a hand to her lips. "Whoops! That was kinda rude, huh? I just intruded on you guys and didn't even say my name!" She gave a bubbly laugh. "I'm Karasukami Kazoku. Nice to meet you both!"
XxXxXxXxX
Umino continued to run, doing whatever she could to lose the pursuing shinigami. As she continued to run, she eventually lost track of which way she had come from in the impossible and unnecessary maze that made up the Seireitei. She took a sharp left turn and flattened herself against the wall, concealing herself within the shadows. It was a good thing her pursuers had been exceedingly low-ranking, otherwise they might have had the sense to scan the area for her reiatsu instead of just bypassing her hiding place like they did.
As soon as she was clear, Umino took off again, not having any idea where the hell she was going. After a while she slowed down to take a breather and a moment to think. Bad idea. The ground below her began to tremble and, working on instinct, she leaped forward as the ground below her gave way. A cowardly trap such as this could only be the work of the twelfth division. The twelfth division shinigami had now begun the chase with nets and chains (and who knows what the hell the other devices were) in hand, ready to capture her for their sick twist of a captain. Once again, Umino found herself running for her life, avoiding the elaborate traps that had been set out for her.
She came to a crossroad, frantically trying to decide which way to go. "Are you fucking kidding me!" muttered Umino as she saw a bunch of blood-thirsty shinigami approaching her from the left. Eleventh divisioners, no doubt about it. Umino turned right to find the path blocked by the tenth division shinigami. She ran forward at the last second, letting the tenth and eleventh division collide behind her. Suddenly, the sound of hinges and latches coming undone was heard, followed by the yells of the shinigami. Glancing back, she saw that the center of the intersection had folded in on itself to reveal a deep, dark chasm, into which the poor underlings had fallen, some making a sad attempt to crawl back out. Umino smiled wryly. 'Thank you twelfth division.'
She cautiously approached the edge of the pit, peering down to look at the shinigami. Umino laughed and began to kick rubble over the edge, her mirth growing each time a rock managed to hit one of them. In the midst of her mocking them, the side began to tremble under her feet and she jumped back as a chunk of the wall crumbled away. "Okay, I get it karma, I'm done now!" she called, turning swiftly from the hole to continue wandering aimlessly through the Seireitei.
Umino slowed her pace to a casual walk, taking in her surroundings. It was awkwardly quiet now that she wasn't being chased anymore. She sighed. 'Kazoku, where the heck are you?' Umino frowned, worried about her sister's whereabouts.
The bespectacled girl turned a corner, only to bump into the solid chest of a soul reaper. She tilted her head up slowly, taking in the choker necklace of the obviously male shinigami. Umino's eyes widened as she viewed the face frowning down at her. It was impossible for her not to recognize him, after all, how could you forget the face of a lieutenant with a sex position tattooed on his cheek?
Umino smiled nervously as she backed away from Shuuhei. "Hehe, oops. Sorry 'bout that." Hisagi eyed her suspiciously as his right hand went to grasp his zanpakuto. "Ryoka." He muttered. Umino locked her eyes onto Kazeshini in fear. "Umm, alright then. I'm gonna start running as fast as I can now. Okay bye!" She yelled, sprinting in the opposite direction of the ninth division lieutenant.
"Oh God, I hate running." The exhausted girl glanced behind herself to see Shuuhei successfully following and gaining on her. Umino stopped, holding up one finger to Shuuhei, as she bent over with one hand on her knee, breathing heavily. Hisagi paused in confusion. "Okay. Timeout. Just." She inhaled. "Just wait a sec. I think I'm gonna pass out here. Ugh, I can't breath!" Getting over his momentary lapse of confusion, Shuuhei restarted the chase. Umino jumped up and started running (again) when she realized he wasn't going to give her a break. "Hey! That's not fair, I called timeout! Gah, stupid Mr. 69!"
Turning around the corner she noticed a young shinigami. He wore a green medicine pack, indicating that he was from the fourth, had black hair that hung down to his chin, and timid chibi eyes to match his expression. Oh yeah, Umino recognized this one as well. She also realized that she was on a collision course with him and, at the pace she was going, she wouldn't be able to stop in time.
Umino ran smack into the seventh seat, bringing both of them rolling to the ground in a jumbled mess. Dazed and off balance, all Umino could think was 'Shit, Kazoku's gonna kill me for hurting Hanatarou!' All she heard from him was the repeated phrase of "I'm sorry! Gomenasai!"
The ill-tempered girl slowly got up only to find that Shuuhei had caught up to her. Still reeling from the collision, Umino was unable to escape as he grabbed her arm roughly and pulled it behind her.
Umino was pissed, she did not like being manhandled. Turning swiftly, she swiped at his face, her nails leaving deep gashes on his 69. Shuuhei grabbed her other arm, efficiently protecting himself from her claws. Pissed, Umino resorted to viciously biting and kicking the hell out of him. She clamped her teeth onto his left shoulder, her inhumanly sharp canines drawing blood.
Looking over Shuuhei's shoulder, she saw reinforcements approaching. "Restrain this ryoka girl!" Hisagi called over his shoulder. The lesser shinigami approached, grabbing her legs and trying to pry her teeth off of their lieutenant. One of the shinigami's hold on her leg slid a little too high for her liking so, with an unknown burst of reaitsu, Umino released her hold on Shuuhei with a guttural growl.
Her reaitsu was enough to make them loosen their hold and she was able to free both her legs and an arm. Hisagi still kept a tight grip on the other arm, leaving her hanging in the air. Umino lashed out, kicking and screaming, trying to bring down at least one of them.
When Umino was successfully restrained, the wielder of Kazeshini glared at Umino. "We'll take her to the captain's meeting. They can decide how to deal with her."
*sigh* Poor Hana-kun, he's still out there!
Okay, so this chapter is actually part of the original chapter, split in two 'cause it was so long. So, be happy! The next part goes up... Possibly tomorrow. But we need reviews first. They are the life force that enables us to click buttons in order to publish. So... Don't let us die! ... Please?
We love you people who have put up with our stupid stalling on posting. Please see the author's note at the beginning of the chapter to see our list of excuses. We love you all. :P