The dinner following the wedding ceremony was wonderful. The restaurant was small, quiet but elegant at the same time. Both Lance and Lauren were anxious for it to end, so they could have time to themselves. The drive back to his house on the beach seemed long, but in actuality is was maybe twenty minutes.
As they pulled in the drive, Lance stopped Lauren before she could open her door. She smiled as he opened the car door, helped her out, then scooped her up in his arms.
"Tradition, " he told her.
Lauren laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I like tradition." she told him.
Lance fumbled with the keys for only a moment, then once inside, he kissed Lauren. "So, what should we do first, take a walk along the beach, go for a swim, or should I take you to bed and make passionate love to you."
Lauren couldn't help but smile. "I say all three, but in no certain order."
Lance's blue eyes sparkled. "Oh, so you're leaving it up to me then?" Lauren nodded. "Well then, let me get you out of this dress and see what happens."
They both laughed and Lance carried her in the direction of the bedroom. Lauren knew tonight would be one she would never forget.
Lance undressed Lauren slowly, then laid her in bed. He closed the curtains, hiding the darkness and the moonlight he had grown to love once Lauren left for alpha.
He undressed before her. "I don't want to think about anything but us tonight. No future, no past, not knowing what will or will not happen. Tonight, you are all I care about. You are so beautiful laying here before me right now and nothing is going to spoil that."
Lance stretched out beside her, taking Lauren in his arms. She rested her head against his shoulder, placing her hand on his chest, silent, contemplating what to say next.
"I am so in love with you Lance Heston," she told him, her voice almost a whisper.
"I feel the same way Lauren." He kissed her, removing her head from his shoulder, resting her against the pillow. "Let me make love to you and show you just how much you mean to me and that the love I have for you is genuine."
"I never doubted you Lance, not ever."
The rest of their words were lost in kisses as passion overtook them both. Soft music played in the background, the soothing sounds of waves crashing on the beach added to the moment.
The made love to one another until they were exhausted. Lance held Lauren close to him as she slept. If something happened and he woke alone in the morning, he would always remember how happy he was tonight. Nothing else could compare. Or at least that's what he thought.
Walking the halls of the hospital, Victor was on his way to look in on John, but as he passed Helena's office, he noticed her light was still on. With the door slightly open, he was almost positive he heard soft crying.
He stopped for a moment, debating whether he should disturb her. Above all, Helena was his friend and maybe she was needing someone to talk to.
With a soft knock on the door, he peered inside her office.
"Helena my dear, are you alright?" he questioned.
She looked up quickly, unaware that her door had been ajar. She dabbed at her eyes with a tissue and motioned Victor inside. "Yes, I'm alright Victor, please have a seat."
He sat before her desk. 'I beg to differ. I'm not sure I've ever seen you cry. Have you received some upsetting news?"
She shook her head. "No, it's nothing like that." she told him, her voice quivering.
Victor reached across her desk, holding her shaking hand in his. "Is there something with John's recovery?" That was the only other thing he could think of to ask.
Helena shrugged, then gently shook her head. "I don't know what to think about John Koenig right now Victor."
It was obvious Helena was visibly upset. "What is it Helena? Talk to me, has there been a setback with him?"
He released her hand, then made sure the door was closed, and they moved to the small sofa in the corner of her office.
"I'm so confused about him right now Victor, first on a professional level, but after this evening, there's personal involvement. As a doctor, I can't allow my feelings to overshadow my professional ones."
Victor almost smiled, but didn't. "My goodness, what happened to bring you to this point and more importantly… to make you cry."
Helena sighed and closed her eyes. "I had a meeting earlier this afternoon, so I was late on making rounds. When I looked in on John, he seemed to be asleep, so I walked over to check on him and he opened his eyes. We just had a few brief words, but as we talked he became agitated and got out of bed.
We got into an argument about his story of the future, the two moons, this girl Lauren he says he has to get to, talking about a relationship we have in the future.
I just remember standing there thinking that his concussion was causing this memory problem or whatever and then he pulled him close to me and….." her voice trailed off.
Victor urged her on. "And what Helena?"
"He…he kissed me, and when I say kiss Victor, it was a deep meaningful kiss. It was the second time he did that and both times, I felt myself respond to his advance."
"Twice?" Victor said amused. He tried not to smile, but failed.
"Yes, and I just looked at him when he let me go. He apologized and then told me it would be best for me to leave or he'd….he would end up making love to me in his bed."
Victor scratched his head. "I can see where the conflict is my dear, but I think the real problem you face right now is why you gave into his kisses."
She agreed. "I'm almost afraid to go back to his room."
"Well I'm sure he's had time to think about what he did. If this future John does indeed have a relationship with a future Helena, maybe he is acting on impulse when the two of you are alone."
Helena shrugged. "Maybe so, I just don't know right now."
Victor gave Helena a warm hug. "Try not to over think things. You look exhausted and you need to rest as well. Get some sleep and I'm sure things will look clearer in the morning. I'm sure you and John can find a way to fix the situation you face with each other."
"I guess you're right," she sighed, and they stood.
Victor gave her a simple kiss on the cheek. "Seriously Helena, get some rest. I know John, he's probably upset as you are. He can be impulsive, but he wouldn't hurt you on purpose."
He winked at her and closed the door as he left. Helena leaned back against the door wondering why the urge to return to John's room seemed so important. It was going to be a long night.
Not knowing how much time had passed, Helena woke slowly, glancing about her office. It took a moment for her to remember the conversation she had with Victor. She had fallen asleep on the sofa in her office, something she rarely did. Setting up, she ran her fingers through her hair and got to her feet. It was 2:00a.m. by her clock. She should have been at home in her apartment in her own bed, instead, her confrontation with John Koenig had left her confused. Why couldn't she get him out of her head.
It was to late to leave, and she did keep extra clothing in her office. She decided to freshen up, then go to the cafeteria for something to eat. Anything to do to keep her mind elsewhere. But as she left her office, she knew where she would eventually end up.
John never really slept after Helena left his room. He tossed and turned for several hours waking from dreams that never really started or ended. The clock beside his bed told him it was 2:45a.m. He thought about looking out the window, then decided against it. Nothing would be different except the distance between the two moons. He still had no idea why he was here, or why Lauren traveled with him. He just wanted it to end, to be over, to be back on alpha with his friends and his Helena. The one he truly loved.
As he got to his feet, only then did he realize Helena was standing just inside his room.
"How long have you been there?" he asked.
"Not long, just a couple of minutes." she told him and closed the distance between them.
John nodded and held his hand out to her. "I honestly thought I wouldn't see you again and that you were going to turn my care over to another doctor."
The faint trace of a smile touched Helena's lips as she took his hand. "No, I'm your doctor John. I don't hand my patients over to anyone."
"I should apologize to you for what happened earlier. I…"
"No need to apologize John. It was my fault, I should be more understanding of your situation. I really have no reason to doubt you, but there is a part of me that does, the doctor part…"
"And the other part..? John asked before she could finish. "The non-professional part, what do you think then?"
John set back on his bed and Helena beside him. Her hands were trembling, but he calmed them in his.
"That part of me believes you're sincere. Sometimes it's the tone of your voice, the look in your eyes, and sometimes you seem worried about everyone but yourself."
"I have a base to run Helena. Over 300 people on alpha look to me for guidance, including you. I don't have time for myself. I wish I had time to tell you everything that we've gone through since the moon left earth's orbit, but I don't."
Helena blinked away silent tears. "How does our relationship come to be?"
John placed a comforting arm around her shoulder. "I don't know if it was any one thing that led to it, it just developed over time, situations we are in, caring for one another if we were hurt or in a danger. I just realized one day that in caring about you and your safety, I really did love you."
She was crying softly against his shoulder and John instinctively held her in his arms. He smiled, although Helena was unaware.
"There is no need to cry," he told her.
Lifting her head, she told him, "Sorry, I'm just being emotional."
"Well, if it makes you feel better, I was being an emotional ass earlier when you came by. I was frustrated by a lot of things and was feeling helpless."
Helena managed a smile as John reached for a tissue and dried her tears. With an ounce of courage, she asked, "When you told me to leave earlier, if I hadn't left, would you have actually made love to me?"
"Yes," John stated without hesitation. "…and Helena, you wouldn't have been able to stop me no matter how much pain it would have caused me. You don't know how close I was to calling you back into the room when you closed the door."
Helena gazed into his eyes, not really sure how to respond. Their lips met again in a tender kiss, despite knowing it was wrong. She was beginning to feel a connection to this John Koenig and she wasn't sure why. Maybe Victor was right, they were acting on impulse. John's kiss grew more demanding, his hand was exploring her body, touching places he shouldn't be. His unbuttoned pajama shirt slid over his shoulders, down his arms.
He kissed the side of her neck. "John, this isn't right," she whispered. "We shouldn't be doing this.."
He looked into her eyes. "You came back to me Helena. Are you looking for more proof that we have a relationship in the future? Did that kiss really give you something to think about?"
Her eyes met his. "I…I don't know, I mean…I'm just so confused.."
John smiled, he was leaning back into the pillows on his bed, pulling Helena close as he did.
She was wearing a simple top and pants, and John loosened the top button of her blouse. He pushed her hand away as she tried to stop him.
"I said you couldn't stop me and I mean it. If you hadn't been curious, or wanted more, I don't think you would have returned."
Helena's heart was pounding. He slipped his hand beneath her shirt. "John, your chest injury, this shouldn't continue.."
"I'm going to make love to you Helena, don't fight it. My chest is going to be fine."
Helena knew he wasn't going to let her go. They were both undressed before she even realized it happened. This was forbidden, she knew it and at this point, there was no going back. She was naked, in bed with her patient John Koenig. Her personal feelings had gotten the better of her. John had her in his arms, pulling her close, making his intention known.
They made love and when they were done, John refused to let Helena leave him.
"John, I really should go now before…"
"No, you're not leaving yet, I'm not done." He raised himself up on one arm and kissed her.
"I'm worried about your chest injury John…"
"It's fine." he assured her. "The pain isn't that bad."
Helena managed to get out of bed. "As far as I'm concerned John, you are done. I'm worried about you."
"So, did you enjoy it?" he asked as she fumbled to gather her clothes and disappear into the bathroom.
She ignored his question and closed the door behind her. Of course she enjoyed it, but did he have to know that. She freshened up, got dressed and walked back into the room. John was still in bed, his eyes closed as he rubbed his forehead.
Helena gathered supplies from the cabinet, then approached his bedside.
"Are you alright?" she asked, the concern clearly in her voice.
John looked up at her. "I'm fine, just feeling tired. I didn't sleep well earlier."
"Okay, I really want to check your chest injury and change the bandages. How are your ribs feeling?"
"Sore," he hated to admit, but making love to Helena was worth it.
Her professional side took over, as she made sure his injury was okay and no stitches has come loose. She moved her stethoscope across his chest and was satisfied his breathing seemed to be normal.
Helena thought about giving him a sedative, but thought differently, he seemed to be relaxed enough without one. Part of her wanted to stay, to crawl back in bed with him, but she knew better, she had to leave.
"Where are you going?" John asked, sensing she had walked away.
"Just putting the supplies away, then I have to go John. I have patients I have to see later, I need to get some rest myself."
John sighed at her response. "I understand."
Helena walked to his bedside and kissed his lips. He grasped her hand for a brief moment, then let her go. As she opened the door John called out to her.
"You never answered my question." he stated.
If the room had more lighting at this late hour, he would have seen her blush. With the faintest of smiles, she simply answered, "…yes.." and the door closed behind her.
John smiled and closed his eyes once again. He was asleep within minutes.