Authors Notes:

Figured I'd keep it fresh and put the author's notes before the story for a change, but my primary intention is to put in a few notes I've forgotten.

First and foremost, I wanted to address my use of Japanese in the story, as I may have accidentally been misusing the word 'reiatsu'. On the Bleach Wiki, this is described as 'the pressure a person's reiryoku (or spirit energy) emits. Not being a natural speaker of Japanese (and having only read the manga from where the anime left off) I assume it's a simple mistake to make. I'll try to list all the terms I use so that it doesn't detract from the experience of reading, though I would hope anyone would be familiar enough with some these terms already.

reiatsu = a person's spirit pressure

reiryoku = a person's spirit energy as a whole

zanpakuto = soul cutter, a shinigami's blade (c'mon, guys, you know what a zanpakuto is)

shinigami = soul reaper (literally means death god)

Seireitei = Soul Society (again, c'mon, guys)

For those of you that already knew what all of these meant, I apologize.

Also, I wanted to include a little analysis of three characters from the last chapter I hope to flesh out more as the story unfolds. You guys remember Kazue, Kenzou, and Kenichi? Well, I took their names from a website I found with Japanese names and their meanings (cause I suck at coming up with Japanese names) and tried to keep them in line with the whole 'K' theme of the Kamisaigaiku clan.

Kenichi - healthy, strong

Kazue- harmony/peace (I thought this one was sort of ironic, considering he come across as a total douche)

Kenzou- masculine, also 'brilliant kimono design' (hence the snappy attire)

Kamisaigaiku- loosely translated using Google, it's supposed to mean God, Disaster, Ward, which sort of fits my idea of what the clan's job is... but more on that later.

This chapter is chalk full of drama, and I'm still not sure I like it. Also, I only read through it once, so expect spelling and grammar errors until I have more time to comb through it.

*Music*

Moonlight- XXXTentacion

Unconditional- Matt Maeson

To prevent long lists of songs that have nothing to do with the story, I'll try to keep it limited to a few that are somewhat relatable to the content in the chapter. Thanks for reading!

As school was closed indefinitely, Ichigo had all day to relax and try his best to forget about Rukia.

That said, he failed quite miserably.

It wasn't even a whole two hours after finding her note that he threw down the controller to his video game console in disgust. He'd tried to read a book, or watch TV. He'd tried to play video games. He had even apologized to Yuzu, who had been fastidiously ignoring him all morning. Karin, strangely, was nowhere to be found.

He showered and threw on his casual clothes and a sweater before heading out. The sun was bright, and it was much warmer out that it had been the day before, but the ice in Ichigo's heart would not melt. He had reread Rukia's note countless times (though he had been trying not to think of her) and with each reading, he felt himself pulled towards her, as if she were beckoning him to the Seireitei. He had no clue as to what he might say to her to convince her not to go through with her engagement, but he didn't care. The only thing he knew was that he needed to talk to her again.

Kisuke's shop was a rather drab affair, situated between much larger concrete structures with more imposing appearances. Compared to them, the small, antiquated store looked a little sad. Ichigo made his way across the lot that made up much of the property, his footsteps crunching through the leaves and frosty grass.

When he knocked on the door, there was no answer.

"Kisuke? You home?"

There was no reply. Ichigo frowned. Where was everyone? Surely Ururu, Jinta, or Tessai were around? He was about to open the door when it slid open of its own accord, revealing a rather guant faced Kisuke Urahara.

"'ello? Ichigo? What brings you here?"

Kisuke opened the door all the way, stepping outside and closing the door behind him, which seemed odd to the high schooler.

"Long story," Ichigo said, "but I need you to open the Senkaimon for me. I have business in the Seireitei."

"Hmm, yeah, business in the Seireitei? You don't say…" Kisuke pulled out his fan, using it to cool himself as he feigned innocence.

"Why are you repeating what I just said? And could you let me in? This is sort of urgent."

Ichgo made to reach around the blonde man to slide the door open when he moved, blocking Ichigo's entry.

Covering his face with his fan, Kisuke said, "Sorry, Ichigo. Can't let you do that."

Ichigo grit his teeth in frustration. Without meaning to, his reiatsu exploded, suffusing Ichigo's body in an aura of azure power. He steadied his nerves, breathing heavily through his nose, and his reiatsu slowly dimmed and faded, leaving Urahara looking concerned.

"Sorry," Ichigo said, "things have been kinda intense. Which is why I need you to open that Senkaimon, as soon as possible."

"I'm sorry, Ichigo, but like I said: I just can't do that. You see, I know why you want to go to the Soul Society, and a very generous sponsor has just bribed me to deny you access to my Senkaimon."

The shopkeeper blushed, fanning himself once more, as if he were a beautiful women selling himself to the highest bidder. Ichigo staggered, flabbergasted by the revelation.

"What? Someone is paying you? Who the hell would be stupid enough to get in my way? And why on earth are you helping them?!"

"Because it's the right thing to do," said another voice.

The sliding door was flung open, and standing inside the shop, her arms full of anti-spirit paraphernalia, was Karin. Again, she looked as if she hadn't slept, but her eyes were bright, and filled with poorly contained ire. She stared daggers at Ichigo, who clenched his hands.

"You bribed Urahara to keep me out of the Soul Society?! What the hell, Karin?!"

She glared at Ichigo. "Not only that, but I paid him to tell me all about your time in the Soul Society. I know about how you saved Rukia from execution, and how you fought off super powered hollows called Arrancars. He even told me about how you beat Aizen and lost your powers, only to get them back and fight in a goddamn war!"

"Kisuke! Why did you tell her about all that?" Ichigo asked loudly, gripping the man by his collar.

"Because I paid him too! I gave him every last yen I had, and it's a good thing I did! I knew something was wrong with you, but a war?! Arrancars?! What the fuck, Ichigo?! And now you've fallen in love with a soul reaper- not even a human- who's engaged to be married! Where does it end?! Are you just going to move to the Seireitei and become a shinigami?! What about us, Ichigo?! What about me, and Yuzu, and dad?!"

Karin stepped in front of Ichigo, pushing him away from Kisuke and forcing him to meet her eye. The redhead looked unnerved at how strong she was. Karin knew everything now, and she looked as though she might have heard a bit too much. A part of Ichigo wanted to hit Urahara for telling his sister what he had done, but he couldn't. It wasn't his fault. The only person Ichigo could blame was himself.

"I'm not leaving to live in the Soul Society," he said, staring into his sister's angry eyes, "I just need to talk to Rukia."

"What for? She's gone, Ichigo! Accept it! She's going to get married and forget all about you! From what Kisuke says, soul reapers can live almost indefinitely, unless they fall in combat! You'll be dead and gone, and she'll forget all about you! Meanwhile, you'll have wasted your entire life looking for happiness when you didn't realize you had it waiting for you at home all along!"

Karin's eyes began to water. She looked like she wanted to drop her bags and punch Ichigo. He definitely wouldn't have blamed her, but at the same time he couldn't help but hate his sister. The things she said to him were like sandpaper on his ears, and made his gut clench painfully.

"Everything I did, I did you protect the people I care about," Ichigo said quietly. "That includes, you, dad, and Yuzu. Don't get it twisted. And as far as my relationships go… stay outta my business."

Karin's chin shook as she stifled her emotions, pushing them down as deep as they could go. Before her tears fell, she turned away from Ichigo.

"I'm not sure who you are," she muttered, "but you aren't the brother I used to know."

"People change," Ichigo replied softly, "it's a part of growing up. You should try it, sometime."

Karin sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve before stomping away, leaving Ichigo alone with Urahara.

"Now then, seeing as my sister is gone, I want you to open that Senkaimon."

"No can do," Kisuke said, "I was paid a hefty sum to keep it closed to you. I don't intend to go back on my word."

"Think carefully," hissed Ichigo, "you owe me a whole lot, and there isn't anything keeping me from marching into your shop and opening it myself, is there?"

"So now you're threatening me with violence? Geez, Ichigo, you sure are grumpy these days, aren't you? Tell you what, come back in a week, take some time to clear your head and sort through your feelings. After that, come back here and ask me again, a little more nicely this time, and we'll see if we can't drum up a Senkaimon for you."

It was clear that it would do no good to argue. Ichigo had had quite enough of that over the last two days. He thought about his dad's advice from the night before. None of it seemed relevant to this situation, but he knew he was acting like an ass, and that Karin, in her own annoying way, was just trying to look out for him. There was no denying it; he definitely needed time to think.

"Fine," he heaved a sigh. "I'll be back in a week… take care, Kisuke."

The redhead turned and trudged away as Urahara straightened his robe and waved cheerfully.

"See ya, Ichigo! Say hi to your dad for me!"

Ichigo didn't often get to wander the streets of Karakura Town during the week. He was surprised at how empty it was, and how little foot traffic there seemed to be as he kicked around downtown. The only thing he knew for certain was that he couldn't go home. Karin was furious with him, so he would no doubt end up confining himself to his room, where he would lay in his bed and smell Rukia in his sheets.

There she was again. No matter what Ichigo happened to be thinking about, it was a sure bet that the petite soul reaper would crop up sooner or later.

'Give it a week,' he thought to himself, 'take some time to clear your head. Figure out what you'll say to her.'

As he walked, he looked in the windows of small shops, not really looking at any of their wares. Instead, he imagined meeting Rukia face to face. He could almost see her pained expression in his mind, and he tried to come up with something persuasive to tell her to make her see reason. Unfortunately, he could only think of saying 'I'm sorry' which did absolutely nothing to explain how much she meant to him.

"Ichigo!" called an airy voice, distracting him from his sorrow.

The substitute soul reaper turned about, seeing Orihime hurrying after him. Her arms were loaded with groceries. Her long hair fell in luscious curls to her waist, and her ever present hair clip fastened her bangs to the side. She wore faded jeans with stylish winter boots and a light sweater. Even in the bright sunlight, Ichigo had to admit that she was a sight to behold. It was no wonder every guy in their class- no, in the whole school- wanted to get with Orihime. Over the last few years, she had grown into a fine young woman.

"Oh, hey Orihime. What's up?"

"I was just out doing my grocery shopping," she said, panting slightly.

"I see."

Ichigo paused for a moment. He was at a loss for words. Not because of Orhime's beauty, but because he found that there was just nothing for him to say. He shook himself mentally, frustrated with how numb and irritable Rukia's absence had made him.

"Those look kinda heavy, let me carry them for you," he said suddenly, taking Orihime's load from her.

"Oh, thanks, Ichigo. You're the best."

"I know a few people who would probably disagree with you on that point," Ichigo laughed dryly, "c'mon. I'll walk you home."

As the two of them made their way to Orihime's apartment, Ichigo listened to her talk about her job in the bakery. Orihime, as it turned out, was a natural baker.

"The trick is finding something to do that won't pull me away from the stove, otherwise I get distracted and burn the goods," she blabbed happily, "that's why I'm so good at Yoga now! Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, I've been doing yoga! Well, not all the time. Just when I bake. That way I don't accidentally burn anything. And of course, I can't do yoga at work, I'd get fired! Hahahahaaa!"

"Heh," Ichigo barely managed a chuckle. Orihime frowned at him, looking concerned.

"Hey, what's wrong? Are you feeling ok? You look sort of… dead inside."

"D-dead inside?" Ichigo asked, taken aback by the woman's morbid words.

"Yeah," Orihime said, narrowing her eyes, "I don't know how else to describe it. I felt that way myself, after my brother died. It was like I was dead inside… the look on your face just now, it reminded me of that for some reason."

"I'm not dead inside," Ichigo scoffed, hiding his feelings behind a cocky persona, "I'm just preoccupied! Unlike you, I haven't found my true calling. I can't keep doing part-time contract work for my crazy boss, either."

"Baking isn't my true calling," Orihime grinned, "I'm just really good at it. In any case, I think it's best not to worry too much, ok Ichigo?"

She gave his arm a light squeeze, and Ichigo flinched from the contact. It sent arcs of strange energy through his nerves, and he nodded dumbly, not trusting himself to speak.

They arrived at Orihime's apartment, and Ichigo had his first good look at the place in a long while. Everything was neat and organized, which was a sharp contrast to the redheaded woman's ditzy personality. All in all, it looked just as it always had. It was nice to see that one thing hadn't changed over the years.

"Could you set those on the counter for me?" she asked, brushing her hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, sure thing."

Ichigo set the bags on the counter, feeling slightly out of place. The entire apartment smelled like Orihime's perfume, which was a little too sweet for his liking, though not entirely unpleasant. When he looked to Orihime, he found that her eyes were fixated upon him, but she caught herself staring and adjusted her slack-jawed expression.

"Here," she said, "I got you some water… are you hungry?"

"Hmm? Oh, thanks. Uh, no I'm not really hungry."

As Ichigo drank, Orihime watched him, a small smile on her face. There was a strange look in her eyes that made him uneasy.

"What's with that look?" inquired Ichigo.

She shook her head. "It's nothing. I just think it's nice of you to bring my bags home for me. You've always been such a sweetheart."

Again, Orihime touched Ichigo, laying a gentle hand on his forearm before letting it fall. Ichigo felt paralyzed, stunned by her touch. It had only lasted a moment… so why had it had such a profound effect on him?

In all their time together, Ichigo had come to know Orihime as a loyal and trustworthy friend. She was always at his side, even when he'd gone up against Yhwach himself. But now they were alone, in a dimly lit apartment with no one else around, and Ichigo found himself incredibly put off by the situation.

But why?

Orihime was easily one of the most gorgeous and popular girls in the school. They had similar tastes in music and videogames and manga. Hell, in the last few years, between fighting, being healed, and just hanging out, Ichigo had spent more time with Orihime than any of his other friends. So why was it that being alone with her seemed so much harder than it had been with Rukia?

And that was when it all shifted into place, as if Ichigo had been looking at things through a kaleidoscope.

No matter what Orihime said or did, he could not help but compare her to Rukia. He may have bickered with the soul reaper constantly, but Ichigo knew when all was said and done, Rukia was the only girl he would ever have feelings for. Since the instant she had stabbed him, and infused his soul with her own shinigami powers, their souls had been connected. Ever since then, their friendship had grown stronger, into something neither of them could describe.

But in the process, Ichigo had all but forgotten about Orihime, and her crush on him. She had faded into the back of his mind, an afterthought, save when Aizen had stolen her away to Hueco Mundo.

The redheaded woman bit her lip, an odd twinkle in her eye as she sidled up to Ichigo. She blushed, leaning in uncomfortably close.

"If only there were some way I could repay you for helping me with my bags," she batted her eyelashes, pressing herself against Ichigo. He could feel every inch of her curvaceous form against him. Her body was so soft and warm, and it was so cold outside…. For the merest instant, Ichigo felt the desire to give in. He thought about planting his lips on Orihime's, and taking her into his arms. She was more than willing. Her eyes were halfway closed, and her luscious lips were pursed. It would be so easy to dive in, and forget his pain.

Or so he believed.

Even as he struggled to forget about Rukia, and his fantastical visions of their life together, he couldn't bring himself to let her go. Orihime was a fine girl, but Ichigo knew that he didn't feel that way about her.

"W-wait," Ichigo stammered, his heart racing as he leaned away from the kiss he'd been about to partake in.

Orihime's face was beet red as she pulled back and opened her eyes, looking completely floored. She had been so sure that the deal was sealed. She had only closed her eyes after Ichigo had begun to reciprocate… but their lips had never met.

"Oh," Orihime said quietly, pushing her hair behind her ear, "I see. You must really love her then… Rukia, I mean."

"Wha- hold on… what did you hear?"

"You and Rukia were together, but had a falling out. Now she's gone… betrothed to some nobleman from the Soul Society."

"I suppose you've been texting Karin, haven't you?"

"Yuzu," Orihime corrected him, smiling bitterly, "we share recipes. When she told me what happened, I thought… I guess I thought that you and I might be able to…."

Ichigo said nothing as Orihime's eyes filled with unshed tears. As much as he hated himself for upsetting her, he felt it would've been worse to kiss her and then admit he had no romantic feelings towards her.

"I'm sorry," Ichigo said, "but… yeah. I really do love Rukia."

"It's fine," she sniffled, "I understand… Rukia is so pretty, and she's a shinigami. I always thought there was something between you two. I just… you and I have so much history, y'know?"

"Yeah, we do," Ichigo agreed, "but listen, I'm not saying Rukia is prettier or better than you, ok? You're a great girl, Orihime, and you deserve someone who loves you."

She wept quietly, wiping her eyes on her sleeve and smudging her make up, but her smile did not waver.

"I wish I could say that helps," she chuckled sadly.

It was no good. Ichigo couldn't stand to watch Orihime cry like that. She hugged herself tightly, not meeting his eyes as she tried to mask the pain on her face. Ichigo was clearly not the only person with relationship troubles. With a small sigh, he stepped forward and embraced Orihime, wrapping his arms around her and doing his best to convey positivity and warmth through the connection.

"It'll be alright," he told her quietly, unable to believe in his own words, "it has to be. Sooner or later."

"I guess we've both had our hearts broken now," Orihime mumbled thickly, causing Ichigo to furrow his brow as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

It had been three days since then. Three long, long days, and three equally long, sleepless nights. Ichigo had hoped that time would heal the wounds in his flagging spirit- people always talked about how time healed all wounds- but after three days, he felt no better about Rukia's departure. He had been stuck at home with his sisters, both of whom had their own reasons for disliking him, and his dad who couldn't seem to take the situation seriously. Each night he would lay awake, wondering if he hadn't made a mistake in not kicking down Kisuke Urahara's door and opening the Senkaimon. He thought about Orihime, and how she had tried to kiss him, and how he had very nearly let her.

On the fourth day, Ichigo decided to get out of his house, choosing instead to go to work, where he could be miserable and make money at the same time. After a long day of manual labor at a construction site, Ichigo fell into his bed, tired and sore from lifting heavy bags of concrete, cement blocks, and iron beams.

His sisters were both in their rooms. His dad was no doubt busy in the clinic, catching up on work he had missed due to his conference. The sun went down and the streetlamps came on, painting Karakura town a sickly shade of orange.

Ichigo stared at the ceiling, lost in his thoughts when a knock at the door interrupted them. Looking at the clock on his nightstand, he saw it was already half past nine o'clock. Visiting hours were over… maybe a clinic patient had accidentally knocked on the wrong door?

Knock, knock, knock.

It was a little louder now, and more urgent. Ichigo swung his legs from his bed when he heard one of his sisters leave her room and tromp down the staircase.

"What?" Ichigo heard Karin ask loudly, not bothering to even act polite.

He heard a quiet reply, but he couldn't make out the words, nor could he identify the person speaking. Ichigo froze, tilting his ear and listening carefully. Whoever was at the door had a powerful reiatsu that felt familiar, though it was fuzzy and hard to make out.

He heard a groan, and the sound of slow, struggling footsteps coming up his stairs. Grabbing his combat pass from his pocket, he stood, prepared to fight should the need arise. He couldn't explain it, but something told him that this was not an ordinary visit. The slow, grunting presence stopped by Ichigo's door. The redhead flinched when something tapped on it.

"Ichigo," Karin's voice came from the other side, "open up. You have a visitor… and he's really freakin' heavy!"

Stuffing his pass back into his pocket, Ichigo threw open his door. His eyes were immediately accosted by a mane of spiky maroon hair tied in a ponytail, a sharp jaw, and jagged eyebrows that still caught him off guard.

"Wassup, Ichigo," Renji mumbled, leaning heavily on Karin, who had slung his arm over her shoulder and was keeping him upright.

"What the- Renji, what the hell are you doing here-" Ichigo's words caught in his throat. The acrid scent of alcohol was heavy in the air as Renji belched. Karin looked disgusted, and quickly removed herself from under Renji's arm, allowing him to drop onto the floor, where he lay, groaning.

"He's your problem, now," Karin said haughtily, turning up her nose at her brother and heading back to her room.

Ichigo watched her go, unsure of what to do with Renji, who looked like he might be sick.

"Thanks, I guess."

The soul reaper on Ichigo's floor groaned and rolled over onto his back. He stared at the high schooler with glazed eyes that seemed to slide in and out of focus.

"Had a bit too much to drink, Renji?" Ichigo asked, extending a hand.

The lieutenant grit his teeth. "Something like that."

Renji was in his gigai, which meant that he had probably been in the world of the living for a little while, but why on Earth would he suddenly stop by, especially when he was totally plastered?

The soul reaper took Ichigo's proffered hand, and was deftly pulled to his feet. The world seemed to spin, but he caught himself against the wall and leaned on it heavily, never once taking his eyes from the substitute soul reaper. It was hard to explain, but something felt off. Sure, Renji's spiritual pressure was hazy, which was to be expected given the fact that he was stumbling drunk, but something in his eyes put Ichigo on edge. Why did they seem so… unfriendly?

"Hey uuuh, Ichigo?"

"Yeah?"

"You wanna-hic-go for a walk with me? I could use some fresh air."

It wasn't lost on Ichigo that Renji wanted to speak in private. Though he was wasted, he still retained an air of seriousness. There was no doubt that whatever the soul reaper wanted to discuss was pretty important.

"Sure. Let me get my coat and we can go down to the park."

After getting his coat and putting on his shoes, Ichigo helped Renji down the stairs and out the door. Once they were walking, Renji shrugged off Ichigo's assistance, walking on his own, though he did stagger a bit.

'If nothing else, he knows how to move forward,' the substitute shinigami observed, carefully looking over Renji.

He looked a little shaky and pale, which was hardly surprising. He smelled like he may have already thrown up, but it was masked by the smell of liquor. After spitting on the ground, Renji pulled a flask from his back pocket and unscrewed it. He frowned, noting its limited contents before taking a swig. He didn't flinch, though a shiver seemed run through him. Without a word, he offered some to Ichigo.

"Uh, I'm good," Ichigo said.

Renji nodded and capped the flask before slipping it back into his pocket. He stuffed his hands into his coat pockets as well, shuffling forward a little more quickly. Ichigo lengthened his stride to keep up.

Before long they were in the park, following the long running trail that looped through tall trees and vast fields of grass used for sporting events and the occasional concert. As they walked in silence, Ichigo once more withdrew into himself. He couldn't help but think of Rukia, and before long, strange thoughts began to irk him. Renji wouldn't show up out of the blue and want to speak privately to Ichigo for something unimportant. Could he be a messenger from Rukia?

Or worse, was he delivering news of her? Could something have happened?

"Hold up, Ichigo," Renji muttered, stopping in his tracks beneath the yellow glare of a streetlamp.

The high schooler paused, looking concerned for the long haired soul reaper. Renji seemed to be shivering, and his skin was frightfully pale. His jaw quivered, but Ichigo couldn't see his face. He didn't need to. Just from hearing Renji's voice, he could tell that something was seriously wrong.

"What's going on, Renji? I assume you called me out here to talk about Rukia-"

"Don't you dare say her name in my presence," the soul reaper snarled. "I… I can't believe I trusted you. To think you would betray me like this is something I never would've seen coming, but then again, you are a human. It's my own fault for thinking I could confide you. Who knew that sacred bonds forged in the heat of battle could be broken so easily?"

Renji turned, glaring at Ichigo over his shoulder. The unfriendliness was gone, replaced with pure malice. Ichigo took a step back, clueless as to what was going on. Why did Renji look so angry?

"Calm down for sec, you aren't making any sense," Ichigo said, meeting Renji's eyes with a defiant glare of his own, "what the hell are you on about? If you know something about Rukia, spit it out!"

"You bastard, I told you not to say her name," Renji growled, gritting his teeth. He clenched his fists, his reiatsu appearing around his body in a shimmering crimson aura of light.

"Renji, what the hell are you doing?"

"Isn't it obvious?" soul reaper popped a small candy into his mouth. His gigai fell to the ground in a heap, but in the gigai's place, Renji's soul form stood at the ready, sword in hand.

"The truth is… I've come here to kill you, Ichigo."

Author's Notes, continued:

Dun dun duuuuuuuuuun. Three guesses as to why Renji is so pissed. Also, Orihime and Yuzu are totally cooking bffs. Dammit, I made myself sad.