Mating Season

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. At all.

Night In

They will never understand the need to sexualize everything.

"So, ready for our night in?" Kaneko grinned at the customer she was conversing with for the last 10 minutes of her break. Sesshomaru, a well paying regular, sipped his tea and nodded.

"I have the candles and the whipped cream. What about you?"

"Just need to pick up the pie after my shift and grab some whole milk. Tonight is going to be awesome!" A man walked by, smirking in that lecherous way.

"Excuse me, but what are you two doing later?" Kaneko squinted at the man and was about to tell him to mind his business, but Sesshomaru interjected.

"We are having a night in. That is all." Kaneko turned her glare to Sesshomaru and sighed. "We were just discussing what else we needed."

"Oh, well, I suggest some red wine for your dinner. Very romantic." Kaneko lost all sense of irritation and it was replaced with confusion. "No night in is complete without wine."

"Ahh, I highly doubt wine would sit well with a pie. I thought you'd get milk for that." The man looked at her strange. "We're having a surprise party for a mutual friend. That's why."

"Oh. I thought you meant a romantic night in. Sorry." He got up and left, completely embarrassed.

Sesshomaru wore a blank expression on his face. What the hell just happened?

"We have lived for a thousand years, Sesshomaru. And as much as humans don't bother me, I will never understand their need to sexualize EVERYTHING. Especially modern ones. You talk about a nice party in your house with desserts, people assume you're making a food porno."

Even during the party, he wore the same blank expression. Kaneko decide snap him out of his thoughts, rolling around in Inuyasha's clothing to make it more convincing.

"Sesshomaru, I'm pregnant with Inuyasha's baby."

"WHAT?!" She even smelled like him! The house froze and Rin, Shippo, Jaken and Kaname bolted into the guest bedroom.

"About time you changed expressions. You're ruining the party." Sometimes, he didn't understand her need to goad his violent instincts, like they didn't understand human sexuality.

"Never do that again."

Apologies for lack of updates. I'm in college and I want to be able to do well so I can keep going to college. I'm still working on a better first chapter and possibly a new Naruto fanfiction. Who knows?