And finally the next chapter is here! Also short but it's packed full of humor, seriousness, and just plain weirdness. I recommend re-reading the previous chapters if you've forgotten by this point.

Chapter Seven

Two hours later, there had been no break in the case. Quagmire's alibi had been confirmed by his 'friend', so he had been let off the hook. Joe had left for the station to help with the autopsy, and there were now only a few cops loitering around the crime scene.

Peter, who couldn't understand the gravity of the situation, was now watching television unconcernedly with Richard, who was convinced that the homicide was an isolated incident. He had already bonked Conan on the head for pointing out the oddities, and so was now happily drinking beer with Peter. Stewie had begun acting weird ever since the crime, and was being kept watch on by Brian, the only member of the household that could understand that his 'baby-talk' was actually foul language.

'If it is the Black Organization, then they would have to have had an operative in the area during the crime,' thought Conan. 'While it's likely that the member has already fled, somehow I doubt it. The fake letter was very aware of the mannerisms of Mr. Quagmire, and they tried to frame Mr. Griffin, but didn't succeed. That reminds me, why did they try and frame Mr. Griffin? The planted letter was designed to frame Mr. Quagmire, so why not also mention Mr. Griffin in the letter?' Conan grinned to himself, excited at the prospect of a difficult case.

Suddenly, Conan was dragged out of the room by Rachel because a PG-13 movie was beginning on TV. Conan protested vehemently, but to no avail. He was forced to sit in the kitchen with Rachel and Meg, who were discussing how Meg might be able to make herself more beautiful without resulting to plastic surgery, liposuction, or any other 'Get Beautiful Quick' scam.

"The first thing you have to do is have confidence in yourself," said Rachel. "Don't let others influence who you are. Just be yourself and follow your own interests."

"I want to be a popular girl," said Meg, "but they generally don't accept me. How do I become popular?"

Rachel giggled before replying, "It's not nearly as hard as you might think. The fastest and cheapest way is to use Wikipedia to learn all about their interests and hobbies, which you can copy and pretend to like the same things they do. If you tell a lie to gain their trust, make sure it's believable, at least to them. The final step is to make yourself visually appealing."

"How do you do that, then?" asked Meg.

Conan wandered away, bored with the girl talk. He sat on the top step of the staircase and began thinking about the case again. Then he noticed a door that was ajar. He approached it and peered through the crack, where he saw Stewie and Brian in heavy debate. Brian was practically shouting, and Stewie was nearly just as bad. Then Stewie pulled a gun out of his jammies and aimed it at Brian, making him back up with his hands in the air.

"Just go away already, OK Brian?" said Stewie, on the verge of screaming. Conan was stunned that Stewie could speak so fluently.

"Fine. But when you go to jail for killing that girl, don't count on me to bail you out!"

Brian backed out of the room and ran downstairs, never seeing Conan. Peering around the door again, he watched as Stewie put the gun away and booted up his laptop. Using his telescopic lenses, Conan could see that he was sending an email. It read:

Got read of the dog. Pesky beast. It suspects, but I scared him away. Even anthropomorphic dogs are still dogs. Richard Moore is here, but he's too drunk to see the truth. No other updates.

Pawtucket

'No way,' thought Conan. 'Isn't Pawtucket a brand of beer with high alcohol content?'

Contrary to popular belief, I'm not contradicting anything I've already said, nor am I creating new personalities for the characters. They are all as accurate as they can be. How, you might ask? Well, read on and find out!

I know I keep saying this, but I really AM going to try and update more frequently. I think I've come up with an easy way to do so, too. Since I'm in college, I think the easiest way is for me to work in the library rather than my dorm room, since in the library I can't do anything 'non-educational' like watching YouTube without getting kicked out, which in turn prevents me from getting constantly distracted.