Tori was leaning up against the wall outside the girl's bathroom, the remnants of a smile (and a blush) lighting up her face with a subtle, glowing warmth.
Beck swallowed loudly, hand clenching around the strap of his backpack. He was nervous; yesterday he'd been so worried about Jade… and so completely at a loss as to what to do about his feelings for Tori. Today was no different… if anything today was worse.
Tori had been creeping her way into his heart from her very first day at Hollywood Arts. Every day she dug down a little deeper, and now he found it hard to look at any other girl without comparing that girl to Tori. Tori was always slimmer, smarter, sweeter… and it sucked. It really sucked. It wasn't like he could just ask her out…
Why couldn't he ask her out? Because Jade needed her. He couldn't take Tori away from her, not so soon after the break up.
He may not have been in love with her anymore, but Jade was still his best friend. He cared about her, and right now he needed to take care of her before he saw to his own needs. Beck didn't really understand it, but even though Jade treated Tori like dirt it was always Tori that Jade took her problems to. Like when Jade had broken up with him that first time; she'd immediately run to Tori for help, for comfort. It had been happening slowly, but Jade was definitely starting to open up to the half-Latina… and Beck had to admit he was a little jealous. It had taken a long time for her to open up to him that way.
But he couldn't be mad at Tori, or even Jade. He knew that Jade felt the same way he did; she wasn't in love with him anymore either. This was just proof that they weren't meant to be together… if they were meant for each other then they wouldn't have constantly been fighting, and when they kissed the fire should have burnt as hot as it first did in the beginning.
But it didn't. Now his heart burned for someone else, and one day Jade's would do the same.
Tori would just have to help her get through the break-up first.
Gathering his courage, Beck breathed out through loose lips that quickly lifted in a poor attempt at a smile and strode quickly to Tori's side. She didn't see him coming, and Beck had to swallow again before he could get the words out.
"Hey, Tori." When Tori turned to him and grinned, Beck's smile became real and his confidence began to trickle back. "How's it going?"
"Great! Really great," she tilted her chin but kept her eyes on him so that her irises were nestled in the corners of her almond-shaped eyes, giving her expression a proud, confident look. "I kept my promise."
"You did more than keep it; she already looks like she's over it!" Eyes darting up and down the corridor, he leaned in close and whispered, as though afraid Jade might appear out of nowhere, "Where is she?"
Tori eyes fluttered nervously and her chin came back down, her expression no longer quite so confident now that he was so close. Beck cheered internally. So Tori wasn't completely uninterested in him…
I was worried she might not see me that way. One less thing to worry about for now, I guess. I can figure this all out once I'm sure Jade's alright.
"She's in the bathroom. I offered to go in with her, but she just rolled her eyes and told me to wait out here. She said I could only go in if I heard screaming… and that if I did to bring the nurse."
Beck cocked a brow. "The nurse?"
"She didn't say, but I'm gonna go ahead and guess that it'd be something like some idiot girl making a stupid comment and getting… intimate… with Jade's scissors."
That made him laugh. Tori always made him laugh, oddly enough only after she'd gotten closer to Jade. Jade could be quite funny when it suited her… it was a dry humor, of course. Tori seemed to be subconsciously taking notes, because recently she'd been more willing to make jokes at other people's expense. Never anyone that she cared about of course, or anyone that had never done her wrong. That was the difference between Tori and Jade; Jade didn't care if she hurt other people, not a bit. Tori was far more sensitive than that; far more people-friendly.
"Well I don't hear screaming, so I guess it's all good." Tori nodded, still smiling, before an awkward silence settled over them. Beck wasn't really sure what he should say next; should he ask about Jade again… or would Tori think that he was still into her if he did? But if he didn't, maybe she'd think he was heartless, which was so not true.
Girls should come with manuals.
"So… how are you taking all of this?"
Beck blinked, looking down at her curiously. "Well… I mean, better than she is, I guess. It sucks, but if we don't love each other anymore, then we shouldn't be together. And I know Jade was a bit… emotional… yesterday, but trust me. She doesn't love me anymore, either." Tori was looking at him skeptically, so he immediately raised his hands in defense and continued, "I'm not the bad guy here! I just… I want us to be with people that really make us happy, you know? This isn't just for me!"
Tori continued to stare at him for a moment, eyebrow perked, before questioning, "How do you know she's not in love with you anymore?"
Beck breathed a sigh of relief when he realized Tori wasn't upset with him. He chuckled before he answered. "Trust me, when Jade's in love with someone, they know it. She's all over you when she's in love; she constantly wants to be held or kissed and she'll never stop asking you to tell her you love her. And she doesn't just receive, she gives. Actually, she gives a whole lot, once you've earned it. When we first started going out she was always kissing me or holding my hand or whispering in my ear." He thought back fondly on their first year as a couple, wondering just when it stopped being love and turned into habit. "When she stopped reaching for my hand… when I realized she hadn't asked me to tell her I loved her in weeks…"
"…you knew it was over?"
Beck nodded sadly. "Yeah. I just hope that after this all blows over, we can still be friends. I don't want her out of my life; I just want us both to be happy. We aren't going to be happy if we try and force this."
Tori nodded understandingly. Her head tilted and she gazed up at him curiously… it was really kind of adorable. Beck was so busy staring and grinning stupidly that he almost missed what she said next.
"Is there another girl?"
Heat rose up in his cheeks and the urge to tell her, spill everything to her and hope for the best, came with it. His sanity thankfully kept the words back, but left his mouth hanging open like a fish out of water. "Uh…"
"You can tell me, really! I'm not mad or anything, and I won't tell Jade! Promise!"
Beck stared down at her, his brows drawn together in thought. Should he tell her? He wanted to… so badly, and it wasn't like he could just lie and say he liked some other girl. Who knows what Tori might do; she'd probably try and get them together, then work on finding Jade a new boyfriend. And with the way she was looking at him… she wouldn't believe him if he said he wasn't interested in anyone.
His body decided before his brain did and he got even closer, taking a step towards her and leaned in close again.
"You really want to know?"
Tori looked nervous all of sudden; her hands were gripping her books with such force that her knuckles stood out against her tan, and she couldn't keep eye contact with him. He on the other hand, was no longer quite so nervous… and he was gazing down at her, trying to catch her eye and maybe possibly convey everything he felt for her, without words. Tori was really blushing now, those beautiful cheekbones colored up all rosy red, and she was so close he could smell her perfume.
Mango…
The tense silence was broken when someone cleared their throat, loudly. They both looked up and Beck felt his stomach turn over.
Jade had come out of the bathroom.
And she looked pissed.
I can't believe this guy! Jade stood with her arms crossed, expression fierce. Not only do I have to listen to all his crap about breaking up being good for us (never mind that I agree, it was still way too sappy) but now he tries to confess everything to her the day after he does it? He hasn't even moved away yet, he's still so close to her…
Jealousy welled up in her and she stomped over to Tori's side, forcing Beck a few steps back with nothing more than the power of the fierce anger rolling off of her in waves. It was a talent of hers, all in the eyes.
"So… what's goin' on? You both talking shrink about me? Worried I might wither up and die now that I don't have Beck Oliver to keep me warm and loved?" Tori was sputtering at her side, trying to apologize, but Jade kept her eyes trained on Beck. She wasn't mad at Tori, if anything she was overjoyed that Tori was still here and still ready to help her in any way she could. Beck on the other hand… she was angry with him. "Well you don't need to worry about that. One thing you actually managed to get right: I did stop loving you a long time ago."
She took a step towards him, and he took a step back, extremely uncomfortable. "I don't need you to protect me and I don't need you to change me! I'll never be the eccentric little sweetheart you always thought you could turn me into… and maybe you realized that. Did you finally give up? Is that why this is all coming up now?"
"Jade, I-"
"Well guess what Beck: I don't need you, and I know what you're trying to do. Unfortunately, it's not gonna work, so maybe you should just give up on that, too."
Beck narrowed his eyes at her, no longer afraid. Now he looked angry, harsh lines scratched against his brow. "What are you talking about?"
"You know what I'm talking about."
She saw him glance over her shoulder at Tori, his eyes going soft for a moment (she grit her teeth in response) before coming back to her and hardening again. He stared for another moment before reaching out for her wrist and dragging her away. She went willingly; there were some things he needed to know… some things she needed to make clear.
She looked back over her shoulder and saw Tori standing there, waiting for a signal from her. She smiled. Somehow she knew that Tori would only come after her if Jade wanted her too; she knew Jade cold take care of herself.
She mouthed a silent 'It's okay,' and smiled again. When Tori smiled back, albeit a bit nervously, Jade let her gaze linger for a moment before turning back around and following Beck to the janitor's closet.
Once inside, Beck slammed the door and turned to her with the most serious expression she'd ever seen marring his face. It surprised her, actually, how fierce he looked all of a sudden.
"Look Jade, I know you're mad at me, but you have no right to get between me and Tori!"
She sneered. He's acting like they're already a couple! "And why not? Do you even know if she likes you that way?"
"I know there's a chance! A chance that I won't have if you stick your dirty scissors into it! I swear Jade, I knew you could get nasty when you were pissed, but to try and ruin my chances with another girl… where do you get off? You know I'm a good guy, why wouldn't you just want what's best for me? If I go out with Tori and you find someone else people will just be able to move on; we'll be able to move on! Why would you be so bitter about this? You said it yourself: you're not in love with me anymore either! So why would you care if I date someone else?"
"First off, I happen to keep my scissors perfectly clean. Secondly, it's because-"
Beck held a hand up to stop her, one finger jutting out at her accusingly. "Don't you dare try and tell me it's because you don't like her. Don't you dare. I know you don't mean all those things you say about her; she's always the one you run to when you're miserable. Don't you dare try and tell me you don't care about her."
Jade stood there, shell-shocked. Beck had never yelled at her like this before; it wasn't in his nature. He was practically seething, and she found that all of her confidence, all of her resolve, had fled. If she hadn't been Jade West, she probably would have been sobbing by now, or at the very least scared. But she was Jade West, so she was just in shock… and even that didn't last long.
She knew what she had to do. It wasn't going to be pretty, but it had to be done.
Jade looked up at him sadly, noting with a frown that Beck's eyes were dark with hurt and anger. She sighed. "You're right. I do care about Tori." The angle of Beck's brows loosened and the threat left his posture, but he still looked angry. He opened his mouth to speak but she pressed on. "More than you know."
"What do you mean?"
Jade took a shaky breathe, hands clenching at her sides. "I… do like Tori. Like, like her. I don't want you with her because I- well, I… I want-"
"What the hell are talking about?" Jade looked up at him, eyes going wide. Beck stared down at her with confusion and disgust growing in his eyes. "The hell do you mean you like like her?"
"Beck, I…" Jade felt a flash of sharp pain cut across her palm and realized she'd been clenching her fists so hard that cut into her skin. Looking down, seeing the blood made her realize that they'd never get out of this closet unless she told him the truth: the whole truth. Otherwise, they'd come to blows before they got out. She forced herself to meet his gaze, Tori's image in her mind giving her strength. "Beck… I'm in love with Tori. And I don't want you to be with her because I want to be with her."
The weight of her words hit her like a freight train, but inside of searing pain she felt nothing but joy. The most beautiful, genuine, happy smile lit up her whole face, the fiercest of blushes turning her porcelain cheekbones to roses. Her eyes dropped to the floor when Beck brushed past her, silent and hard and furious. She heard the door slam, but even as the sound grated against her ear drums her smile continued to grow.
Snatching her bag off the floor, she set out to find Tori… the girl she was in love with. And with that thought in mind, for the first time in her life, Jade West giggled in glee.
Hello again. I apologize for the time between chapters but I actually just moved into college so it's been pretty hectic. Plus, I wanted to get a chapter in on another story I'm working on; the poor thing's been feelings neglected.
Now I hate to nag, but out of the 1000 people that read the last chapter, only 10 reviewed. I mean, I'm amazed by the fact that 1000 people read the last chapter, but people please tell me why you like this story, especially what you may not like about it. I want to improve as a writer and I can't really do that if only 10 (wonderful) people give me feedback.
So please, read and review and I promise the next chapter will come a lot faster.
Love, Celery Sticks :D
