Reclaim
The room was chilly and quiet. Only a handful of people sat around the table. District 13 had hid away in their tombs for several days after the bombings just to make sure there was no second assault. When the coast was clear everyone pretended to go back to his or her routines as if nothing had happened. Most of the old quarters were destroyed, so it became necessary to relocate. But even with the relocation the citizens of 13 followed their schedules and orders without question. Pandora found this behavior unsettling and pathetic.
Her eyes shifted from face to face as she lifted a glass of water to her lips and sipped.
"This has to be the stupidest idea I've heard." Haymitch said. "A rescue team?"
Plutarch nodded. "A rescue team."
"Someone could die."
"Multiple people, actually." Pandora replied. Haymitch looked at her.
"And why are you here?" He asked.
"Because I am going."
"You can't be serious?" Gale cut in.
Pandora was surprised that he was asked into Command for this meeting. Plutarch hadn't given her any indication who would be in attendance. Finnick was absent, even Katniss. She was glad Finnick wasn't here. She knew the medic had deemed him unfit to go into the field, and even if they had given him permission she would have fought against it. Pandora needed to know that Finnick was safe. If she was going to save Annie, she needed Finnick out of the way.
Gale glared at Plutarch. "She's coming?"
Boggs stepped forward from behind Coin. "Miss Sullivan knows where they are being kept."
"I'm sure she does. I'm sure she knows exactly where they are."
Pandora lowered her glass and smirked. He was a fool, but a cocky fool.
"I have to say, Plutarch, I too have my reservations about this." Coin finally spoke. "Pandora is—"
She arched her eyebrows and peered at Coin. "There is little you can do about this, President. I am going."
Coin bristled at that.
"What are your interests in being on a rescue team? This is beyond suspicious." Gale spat out. "She's probably going to turn on us the minute we land in the Capitol."
"If you're going to insult me at least address your comments to me, and look me in the eye when you do it, you naïve little boy."
Gale jumped to his feet. Boggs stepped forward. "That's enough. Hawthorne, sit down. We aren't here to bicker."
"Yes, Mr. Hawthorne, sit down. We wouldn't want you to hurt yourself." Pandora said.
"Are you threatening me?"
"No. Would you like me to?"
"Pandora, that's enough," Plutarch said. She felt his fingers gently tighten around the curve of her shoulder. "Tell them what you told me. About Peeta."
Haymitch leaned forward. "What about Peeta?"
Pandora glanced around the table once more. "They're doing something to him. I saw it in the footage, those interviews. His behavior is being modified. I can tell."
"Like what they did to you?" Coin asked.
Plutarch lifted his hand. "We're not talking about that right now."
"It's fine, Head Gamemaker."
The mood in the room shifted when Pandora used that Capitol term. She could feel everyone's bitterness unveiling slowly. It wasn't the ideal thing to say in a room full of rebels.
"Sorry—I mean Plutarch. Habit."
"It's okay."
"Yea, right." Gale muttered.
"To answer your question, President, it is nothing like what happened to me. What they did to me took years to do. I was conditioned and molded. It had little to do with torture and everything to do with recreation. With me they wanted a vessel to do their bidding, with Peeta Mellark they are just torturing him and in turn torturing Katniss. Snow is clever. He knows that he doesn't need to get his hands on Katniss to torture her, all he needs is someone she cares about."
The room was silent. Everyone was listening. Even Gale.
"You don't care about Peeta Mellark." Haymitch said after some time. "So why do you want to be on the rescue team in the first place?"
Pandora lifted her eyes. Her face remained unmoved. "Your right. I could care less about him. I have no alliances here. I'm going to save Annie Cresta."
"You shouldn't admit those things here." Boggs said.
"Why not? It's the truth. My loyalties don't lie with any rebellion, they lie with individuals. I have a duty to help Finnick."
Plutarch was trying to motion for her to shut up but she ignored him.
"I realize this puts me in a bad light—all of you seem to put so much weight in your mission, and I don't blame any of you for doing that. Someone has to care about a rebellion, it's just not going to be me."
"Then how can the revolution trust you, Miss Sullivan?" Coin asked.
Pandora straightened her back. "You're operating under the assumption that I need your trust. I don't. You need me more than I need you. That is why you haven't executed me for everything I had to do in the Capitol."
"Maybe I haven't out of the kindest of my heart. Plutarch tells me you were forced to do all those things."
Pandora looked at Coin then. She studied those pale eyes and stoic face. "As if that matters to any of you. When a terrible deed is done people tend to forget the details of why, they only care about what was done to begin with. And forgive me for saying, Alma, but I don't think you're kind at all."
"Pandora!" Plutarch hissed.
"No offense intended, of course."
Coin looked like she wanted to murder her.
"Snow carved me out. He killed my family, and then used the idea of them to manipulate me further. I would have never won the games without him. I should be dead right now. I should have died in the arena. He took my memories and emotions and scrambled them. He took everything from me. If you want some comfort that I won't turn on you the minute we land in the Capitol then there it is." She looked at Gale. "I won't turn on you, Mr. Hawthorne, because although I don't really like you, I hate Snow with every fiber of my being. Before I die I am going to rip open his throat and watch him bleed out. So rest assured that when you turn your back on me I won't put my knife in it. I won't because I'm saving my knives for someone else."
Silence.
Pandora let her words settle in before finishing off the water in her glass. Plutarch tried to change the subject back to the plan but everyone seemed to be a in a dizzy state of uneasy quiet.
Finally, Haymitch started laughing like a hyena. He slapped the table and stood up. "Well that's good enough for me. So. When does the team leave?"
The plan came after. It would be a stretch to say that the pieces fell smoothly into place, but they fit well enough. All the risks were clear to everyone involved. It would be a small recon team, the smaller the better. Going into the Capitol wouldn't be a walk in the park. Haymitch left soon after with Gale to break the news to Katniss and Finnick. Pandora knew she should tell Finnick that she had volunteered to go, but she couldn't bring herself to. Her hope was that she could hop on the hovercraft and come back with Annie before he even realized that she had left with the team—it was improbable hope, but it was the best she could do.
"You're with me, Miss Sullivan." Boggs said. "We only have a few hours to prepare."
She nodded and obediently followed.
"It would be best to fly under cover of darkness." Pandora said.
"True. The problem will be getting through the security."
She thought of the corridor of cells that Plutarch and Adric had saved her from and chewed on the corner of her mouth.
"That was quite a speech you gave everyone. No wonder you did so well on camera."
"I never was allowed to say those things on camera in the Capitol."
"Right and for good reason. Remind me never to get on your bad side."
"Maybe you're already on it."
"Oh, I shudder to think…" She corner-eyed him and saw that he was smiling. "Odair isn't going to be happy about you joining us."
"Let him be unhappy."
They passed through the security checkpoints of the armory as quickly as possible and started to suit up. It had been a long time since Pandora had been in combat clothing. The quality of 13's combatware wasn't as high as in the Capitol, but it was surprising comfortable.
"Looks like you're going to break in your knives finally." Boggs said as she bent over the case that Beetee had given her. Her eyes danced around the different blades.
"Let's hope they don't need to be used."
She strapped the Cat's Claw, a long sword with its scabbard, across her and pulled the cestuses on her hands.
"Let's go." Pandora said.
She was about to walk away when she felt Boggs grab her arm. Slowly she turned to face him.
"I'm sorry about what happened to you."
She wriggled away from him. "Yea, well—it doesn't matter anymore. Snow will pay for everything he's done one way or another."
"Not Snow. I'm talking about Nyx. I'm sorry."
She felt her scar burn and dropped her eyes in surprise.
"They all think when we touch down in the Capitol you'll turn on us. But you and I both know that's not what they need to fear."
Pandora breathed deep.
"You can't be captured."
"I won't be."
"Right. And I'll be there to make sure you aren't."
"Orders from Coin?"
He smiled. "No. I thought that up all by myself. I don't think Coin's caught on yet. She still thinks you're a monster."
"She's not wrong."
Boggs's smile turned into a grin. "We should move. The rest of the team is meeting us soon."
The journey to the Hanger was walked in silence. Pandora had to keep herself from clenching her fists. With the cestuses, too tight of grip would charge them with electricity. When they finally arrived Gale was already there. The hovercraft had been prepped.
Pandora's hair flew around her face and shoulders. The blade across her back was heavy. If she peered over her left shoulder she could see the hilt ready to be grabbed.
"When was the last time you fought?" Boggs yelled to her over the roar of the engine. "Maybe you're rusty."
"Speak for yourself." She said.
The sky above was filled with stars as the Hanger opened up in preparation. Pandora tilted her head in awe. It had been far too long since she had seen the sky. The fresh air kissed her face. She stopped on the boarding ramp to the hovercraft and closed her eyes. Inside her was a mess of fear and unease, but the more she breathed in the fragrance of the world outside the stronger she felt. It wasn't peace. She knew that. Peace wouldn't come until she found her way back to Adric and the rest of them, but it was a taste of relief to know that stars still existed.
"Pandora!"
She opened her eyes and turned around. Finnick was running toward her.
"What are you doing here?" She asked.
"What am I doing here? You can't go."
"Finnick I have to."
"No!" He grabbed her shoulders. "What if—"
"Don't." She knew what was about to come out of his mouth. "Don't say it because it won't happen. You know I have to do this."
"Why?"
"Because you love her, Finnick."
"Pandora please don't go. You could die."
She pressed her forehead against his and patted the back of his neck. "Tonight is not the night I die. Let me do this for you."
He shook his head and stumbled back. "You'll die. I know it. I can't—you—"
"Finnick. Listen. Listen to me." He looked at her then and the wind settled. "I am going to find her and I'm going to bring her back to you. I promise you. Right now Annie is scared and she's all alone. I have to do this. I know now, Finnick. I get it. I get why you left me. I understand. You are in love with her," Pandora paused to think. "And it hurts more than anything to be torn away from the ones we love. People call it heartbreak but it's nothing like that. It feels like something's hollowed you out. You need her. She needs you."
"Miss Sullivan!" Boggs called from the hovercraft.
It was time.
"I'm telling you right now that I'm angry." Finnick was holding back tears. "If you go—"
She took the few steps forward and wrapped her arms around him. He struggled but Pandora just hugged tighter.
"I spent years surviving in the Capitol, Odair. I can do it one more night."
Without looking at him she spun around and walked up the ramp. The minute she entered the main compartment the hovercraft started to close. Pandora heard the doors screech shut and took her seat. Gale sat across from her. He seemed to be lost in his own world for a moment, and then he lifted his eyes to Pandora. Boggs was busy barking orders. She answered Gale's stare with a sad smile.
"It's very brave of you to do this for her," Pandora said to him.
"I don't know what you mean."
She strapped herself in. "Of course you do."
He mirrored her actions and grimaced.
"I just hope everyone's safe by the time we get to them." Gale said.
"Don't kid yourself, none of us are safe."
The hovercraft started to lift. Tremors rumbled and shook.
"So that promise you made about not stabbing me in the back with one of your knives…"
"Yea?"
"Well I couldn't help but notice," Gale looked like he was almost smiling. "You're carrying a sword."
"Just don't piss me off too much, Hawthorne."
They lifted higher, until they were well over the trees and further into the cloak of clouds. They soared through the air, closer and closer to the Capitol. Pandora closed her eyes. Beside her she felt Adric's phantom ghost appear and smiled. He was with her, even if it this was a product of her cruel and messed up mind, he was there. She allowed the memories to filter through her mind then—flickers of happiness interchangeably mixed with blotches of pain. As her thoughts traveled through the past she couldn't help thinking how lovely the world was and how horrible. The world doesn't care about your life or your enemy's. All you have are the moments of choice and change that make you who you will be. At one point she believed that everything was lost, but that wasn't the truth. Nothing is lost. Sooner or later everything returns.