"Hey you. How are you?"
"I'm okay. Standing outside, staring up at the sky. Of course, I can't see any stars, as there are so many damn lights on at the base." Kensi heaved a sigh. "And I miss you."
"I miss you too. You're not pissed at me?"
She started to walk, not wanting anyone to overhear. "No, not really. It's just that, seeing you and Nico and finding out you had this whole thing going on, it was hard, you know?"
Deeks walked out onto the terrace and breathed in the cool scents of evening. "I know. That's pretty much how I felt when I learned about you and Jack. That you had this whole past you'd never told me about."
"Oh come on, that was completely different."
"Was it?" He was trying very hard not keep cool, to understand but it wasn't easy and that last statement just kind of slipped out. He knew it would rile her.
"Of course it was. He's dead, for a start. And Nico isn't. And I'm here and you're there and so is she and…" Kensi stopped, her voice quavering.
"I knew you were pissed at me. Okay – so what do I have to do? Just tell me, Kensi – and I'll do it. If you want me to jump into the car and drive down and then sneak into the base and climb in through your window with a rose clenched between my teeth, then tell me. And I'll do it. Because if that's how I have to prove to you that I love you, then that's what I'll do. Because I do. Love you, I mean."
She started to laugh. "You are a complete idiot, you know that, don't you?"
"But you love me. Don't you?"
"Of course I do."
"And you trust me – don't you?"
"I trust you. I'm just not so sure about Nico though." There. She'd finally said it.
"I think I'm safe from her clutches. For one thing, she's just lost her fiancé, who she talked about the whole way back to LA. And for another, we picked up her Mom on the way over and she came back with us. In fact, she's sleeping in the same room as Nico. So unless you think I'm going to have some kinky three-way session, with my dead mother's best-friend and her daughter, I reckon you can sleep easily."
"You haven't seen my bed here. Lumpy doesn't begin to describe it," Kensi said ruefully. "And the woman I'm sharing with has pictures of Justin Bieber upn on the wall. It's like some kind of shrine. Everywhere I go in the room, his eyes keep following me."
"Bit like mine do when you come out of the shower?" God, he was missing her so much. "Pity you didn't take Nico up on her offer and stayed over in her suite, isn't it?"
"Did you see the size of that bed? Talk about enormous. NO, this single here feels too big without you. I'd be lost in hers and just spend the night howling and wishing you were here."
"I wish I was." He looked up at the moon and wondered if Kensi was doing the same.
"So do I," she said sadly.
"Are we ever going to talk about Jack and how he messed you up so much?" Ever since he'd learned what that sadistic bastard had done, how he'd abused Kensi physically and destroyed her mentally, Deeks had been waiting for her to talk about it, to let him into this part of her past. But she'd never said a word. It was as if she had simply drawn a curtain over the whole sorry affair and pretended it had never happened. Only he knew you couldn't just wipe out two whole years of your life.
"Maybe when I get back – once this whole mess is sorted out?"
"You can't run away from your past, Kensi. It's always there." And God knows, he'd tried to do that. It was only when Marty Deeks had finally accepted that part of him would always be Michael Brandel that he'd been able to start living properly again, and actually start a proper relationship, rather than a series of encounters. "Trust me?"
Kensi was terrified of being judged and found wanting. She felt such an idiot, making all these excuses for Jack, putting up with his abuse, telling herself it wasn't his fault, he couldn't help it and she should be more understanding. "I do trust you. I trust you more than anyone," she said slowly.
"I won't let you down. I promise."
And she thought that maybe she could believe him and maybe, just maybe, this time it was going to be alright.
"Callen said to tell you we're coming back tomorrow, by the way. We've pretty much wrapped up everything here, since Spears gave himself up. He's coming under a separate escort. It's been a long day, what with trying to get some sense out of him before the psych guy finally took over. And then we bagged up all his belongings, got his laptop and phone for Eric and took statements from all his crewmates. Looks pretty much like the classic case of loner goes loco." She stifled a yawn. "Sorry, but it's been a long day and I'm about ready to roll into that horrid bed and miss you like anything."
"I'll think of you wearing that shirt and I won't sleep. Do you know how good you look wearing a guy's shirt, by the way?"
"About as hot as you do wearing nothing at all?" she responded sweetly. Tomorrow she would be back home. Tomorrow, everything would be just fine.