Disclaimer: I own none of these characters. I just use them for own amusement and often make them do things JK Rowling would hate me for. Alas I thank her for letting me have my fun. I make no money off these stories. It's purely entertainment and no copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: Post war. Hermione is 23, young and carefree. At least in her spare time. She leads a double life, hiding her true self from her friends and colleagues at work. Deep inside, she's still struggling over the aftermath of the war, the loss of her parents, and a failed romance with Ron. She meets up with someone she didn't expect to meet, who is also fighting their own post war demons. None other than Draco Malfoy. What will happen between them? Can two enemies come together or will they still bear grudges over the past?
Authors note: This story is somewhat similar to another story I started but sadly lost the muse and did not finish. I wanted to tell a somewhat darker tale about loss and self destruction and finding oneself when the world as you once knew it no longer exists. I wanted a story about two people who are in pain and self loathing, coming together in mutual self destruction. I know it might sound terribly depressing, but I do like a happy ending. But I think these two characters need to work for it. So this story is what I really wanted to write. It won't leave my head, so I hope I can stop letting the romantic in me take over and do the story the proper justice. Rated M for a reason. No actual smut, but plenty of sexual situations. Mentions of rough sex and non consensual sex, but no actual non-con takes place. Bad language, drinking, smoking. It's a dark world, but I still believe in redemption. And that's what this story is ultimately about. Lyrics by Alanis Morissette, Three Days Grace, Poe and A Perfect Day.
You're beautiful, and you're dangerous
A saint with a bad influence
And I just might
Kill you while you're sleeping
But when I toss and turn at night
And you smother me in kisses
Well, you change my mind
You take the good and the bad in me
The bitter and the sweet
Cause I'm a walking contradiction
Once they left the restaurant, they ended up back at Draco's place because it was right down the street. They got to the steps and he stopped and looked over at her.
"Are you sure you wanna come up with me?" he asked cautiously.
"Why wouldn't I?" she asked.
"I dunno. I mean, before we were just playing a wicked little game. This is different," he tried to explain.
"Yeah, it's different. But that doesn't mean we have to do anything different. I rather enjoyed my time with you before. Didn't you?"
"Definitely. But I don't know. Do you want me to be romantic? I don't think I know how," he admitted feeling highly uncomfortable suddenly.
"Romantic? Did I say I wanted you to be romantic? I said I wanted you to punish me," she reminded him as she playfully kissed his ear.
"I don't wanna punish you, Hermione. Not anymore."
"Oh come on Draco. Stop being weird. You're over thinking this. This is supposed to be fun, remember? Just be you," she urged him.
"Yeah, but I'm a prat. You said so yourself many times. Shouldn't I be nicer?" he wondered.
"If I wanted nice, I'd be standing here with someone else. I want you. I thought you wanted me. Do you want me to be nicer to you?" she asked.
"No. I like the way you bitch me out and yell at me. It's highly arousing," he admitted as he leaned over and kissed her.
"So then what the hell are we waiting for? My virginity to grow back? Let's go upstairs, you dolt! I haven't got all night. I do have work in the morning."
"Fine. Get your hot little ass up these steps or I'm gonna throw you over my shoulder and carry you up," he grinned at her.
"Now that's more like it," she said as she took his hand and ran up the steps with him.
Once they got out of the elevator, he actually grabbed her and picked her up.
"What the hell are you doing?" she laughed at him.
"I'm carrying you," he told her as he flipped her over his shoulder, despite her protests.
She started smacking his ass and telling him to stop, but she was laughing.
"I don't need carrying, you caveman! Put me down!" she cried.
"Be quiet, will you? I have neighbors. They'll wonder what the fuck I'm doing to you out here."
"So put me down!"
"No."
She kept smacking him but she was giggling too much to cause much damage or slow him down. They reached his door and he unlocked it and shoved it open quickly and deposited her on the couch roughly.
"You are a complete moron," she informed him with a smile.
"That's it, keep insulting me. I like it," he purred as he climbed on top of her and began kissing her roughly.
It was easy to get lost in the moment between the two of them. They had a chemistry that neither had ever felt before with anyone else. It was electric. It was intoxicating. And even if they weren't actively trying to hurt each other this time, it wasn't exactly a gentle ride. Draco leaned down and kissed her neck roughly and she felt his teeth bite into her. It sent shivers down her spine, right to her toes.
"Oh God, I love it when you do that," she uttered breathlessly.
"You do eh? You don't mind if I leave a mark on you?" he asked curiously.
"I just wave my wand and it's gone."
"No. Leave it. This time, leave it there," he urged her as he kissed her again.
"I can't leave it. Someone at work will see it," she tried to tell him between kisses.
"So? Who cares? I want you to leave it."
She didn't get a chance to argue with him because he began taking her clothes off and she forgot everything else. Especially when his head traveled south and he planted his face firmly between her legs. Her eyes rolled back and she moaned in pleasure. The man was skilled with his tongue, that's for sure. He sent her reeling over the edge before she had a chance to even gain her senses. The next thing she knew he was kissing her hard and she could taste herself on his tongue.
"I want you in me. Now. I need you," she whispered blissfully.
He obliged her and thrust himself deeply into her, pounding her with more force than he was sure she wanted, but she made him lose his mind. She cried out and he stopped momentarily and looked down at her.
"Am I being too rough?"
"No. Don't stop. I'm not gonna break. Do it hard. I like it that way," she urged him.
And with that permission he stopped trying to be what he thought a lover should be, and just did what came naturally. That's what she liked. That's what she wanted. And that's what made him lose himself in her so easily. She was perfect. And obviously she wasn't shy about her own desires because she made it quite clear he was doing something right. It didn't take too much longer for them both to be lost to utter bliss. But this time when it was over neither of them rushed to get up and get dressed and get gone. They just lay there together on the couch breathing heavily and trying regain their senses. He nuzzled her neck and kissed her lips gently and then just buried his face in her hair, breathing in the scent of her floral shampoo.
"You smell so good," he whispered to her.
"Hmm, I do?"
"Yes, totally edible," he said as he playfully nipped at her neck again.
"That was pretty fucking amazing, you know," she told him as she ran her hands through his messy hair.
"Yeah? I thought it'd be weird or something but it's not. I mean, it felt right. And I'm not even panicking right now because it's been more than thirty seconds since I've come and you're still under me. That's a record for me," he said with a small laugh.
"You really panicked that fast?"
"Normally, yeah. I mean, once I was done, I just wanted to get the hell away. But I kind of like this," he admitted as he scooted down and laid next to her.
"I like it too."
"Stay here tonight. Don't go home," he told her as he ran his hand down her arm gently.
"I can't. I have to work. I don't have clothes here and I'd need to get up extra early," she explained.
"That's not fair. I'm not running away, but you're fixing to leave me this time," he pouted.
"Don't be silly. I'm not running out on you. I'm still here. Put that pouty lip away. My God, did you pull that pathetic face on your mum as a child? I bet she gave you anything you wanted," she laughed as she poked at his pout and tried to make him smile.
"I'm not pouting, I'm disappointed. There's a difference. But yes, that look was always quite effective, I have to admit," he grinned at her.
"Your poor mum. No wonder your parents spoiled you silly."
"Is it working on you? Are you gonna stay?" he asked hopefully.
"No, the look is not working. But believe me, I don't want to leave. I just really need to," she tried to explain.
"It's fine. I understand. You're a responsible adult with an actual job. I'm just a lay about spoiled little rich kid. I have nothing to wake up for in the morning," he sighed.
"Sure you do. You'll get to see me. At least after work. If you want. I mean, I don't want you to think I expect you to always see me. But if you felt like it," she rambled softly.
"How about I meet you at work? I'll bring you lunch. Something proper and not a bloody bagel. That's not even real food."
"You can't come to my work again," she shook her head.
"Why not? Who cares? Potter knows about us. Why hide?"
"Good point. I dunno. I guess you could. But I only get an hour."
"That'll do."
"Okay. I get lunch at noon so don't sleep through it."
"I won't. I'll be there. Do you really have to leave right now?" he wondered curiously.
"Not just yet," she told him.
"Good. Let's just stay right here a bit longer," he said as he closed his eyes and laid his head on her shoulder. This was all so foreign to him but it wasn't as scary as he thought it'd be. It made him wonder a little if he'd had a different life, would he have ever bothered to get to know other girls before he ran off. But then he shook the idea from his mind because he knew it wouldn't have been right with anyone else. He was waiting for her. He just didn't know it. But now he did and he wasn't going to fuck it up. She was the one good thing in his sorry life and he would not lose her to his own stupidity or cowardice. He had to be strong. He had to let go of his fears. He had to trust her. And that did not come easily. He'd never trusted anyone before. But he knew he had to. That's the only way it would ever work.
The next day Hermione went to work as usual. But she stopped at Shelley's desk and bid her good morning.
"Morning Shelley," she said pleasantly.
"Good morning, Miss Granger," Shelley smiled.
"Um, I just wanted to tell you I'm expecting a lunch date today. And I don't want you to get yourself in a tizzy over it again. But Draco will be here at noon. Do let me know when he arrives, okay?" she told her quietly.
"Oh my God, a lunch date with him? I thought you said you weren't dating him? You sly devil. Did he send the roses?" Shelley asked with excitement.
"Yes, he sent them. And I wasn't dating him before. I'm not even sure I'm dating him now. But he'll be here for lunch. Try not to wet yourself this time and don't tell the entire office."
"Right. I'll be normal. No problem. I won't say a word to anyone."
"Good."
"But everyone will see him. You do realize he's not invisible and he's rather noticeable when he enters a room."
"I know that. But that doesn't mean you need to gossip. Lips zipped. Got it?"
"Yes."
"Okay. I'll just go to my desk now."
She turned and walked quickly to her desk and hoped it wasn't a mistake to allow Draco back at her work. But it was too late now. But what was the harm really? The one person who she had wanted to hide this dirty little secret from, already knew. And Ron was not in the picture anymore. He worked in Diagon Alley with George. But then there was the rest of the staff to contend with. She shouldn't care what they thought, but she did. She didn't want people gossiping about Hermione Granger being involved with a former Death Eater. It wouldn't sit well. But she was trying to be calm about it. She was trying not to let it affect her too much. She'd worn her hair down today, which she never did. But she wanted look appealing to Draco. But she was still dressed in one of her dingy little suits. But she unbuttoned the top button so she wasn't quite so bottled up.
When lunch time arrived, she suddenly worried that Draco panicked and wouldn't come. Perhaps he'd thought on things, and realized it wasn't what he wanted after all. He was moody like that. And it wouldn't surprise her if he bailed entirely. But just as promised, noon struck, and she could hear Shelley giggling and laughing again. That woman really needed to get out on a date, Hermione thought to herself. But she couldn't have Draco. That thought surprised Hermione for a second. She realized she was feeling possessive of him. But she wasn't even sure if he was hers really. But either way, she stood up and decided to put an end to the giggle fest at Shelley's desk. She walked up and saw Draco sitting on Shelley's desk with a grin and a picnic basket next to him. They were talking and Draco reached over and touched Shelley's arm which sent her into giggles once again. Hermione seethed. Was he flirting back with her?
"Uh, hello," Hermione said, announcing her presence.
"Hey there. I was just telling Shelly how much I liked her dress," Draco told her.
"Really? How nice of you," Hermione said in a clipped tone.
Draco looked at Shelley and then he stood up. "I think I'd better go now. Take Hermione shopping someday, will you? She could use a dress like that." He winked at her and then grabbed the basket and went over to Hermione.
"Did you just wink at her?" she asked with more irritation than she meant to show.
"Relax love. I was just being polite. Remember you told me I should try it sometime?" he reminded her.
"You were flirting."
"It was harmless," he insisted.
"Well don't do it. You'll give her fantasies for weeks," Hermione scolded him.
"Someone's jealous, aren't they?" Draco smirked at her.
"Shut up. I am not."
"Right, okay. Look, I brought food. Are we eating at your desk or someplace else?" he asked holding up the basket.
"At my desk. It's a little more private than the cafeteria."
They walked back towards her desk and once they got to her cubicle he put the basket down and grabbed her up and kissed her hard. She melted into him and completely forgot where she was for a moment. Then he pulled back and smiled at her.
"You wore your hair down, I see." He ran his hands through it and pushed it back slightly and looked at her neck. "The mark is gone. I thought I told you to leave that."
"I couldn't leave it. Are you mad? I can't come to work with a hickey on my neck," she said in hushed tones.
"Why not?"
"Because! It's not professional."
"I'll just have to make a new one," he said devilishly as he bent down and kissed her neck roughly.
She couldn't help but relish the feel of his touch and he knew that her neck was one of her most erogenous zones. She was helpless against him. But she came to her senses and grabbed his head and pulled it away from her neck.
"Stop. You are impossible. Do you want me to be embarrassed?" she scolded him.
"I just want everyone to know who you belong to, that's all," he purred at her.
"Who I belong to? Why not write your bloody name on my forehead then? That would do the trick. Besides, who says I belong to anyone?" she admonished him.
He just looked at her and sighed. Perhaps he'd read her signals wrong? He thought she wanted some sort of actual relationship with him, but maybe he was mistaken. And if that's the case, he felt incredibly foolish. Maybe this was still a game to her?
"Look, are you hungry because the food is getting cold. We should eat," he told her as he opened up the basket.
"What is it?"
"It's Italian. I got it from my favorite place." He pulled out the food containers and set them on the desk. Then he sat in the chair opposite hers and opened up his food. They ate in silence for a bit and it suddenly felt uncomfortable for Draco.
"Do you like the food?" he asked finally.
"It's delicious. I'm not used to having much for lunch."
"So you don't want to belong to me, is that it?" he threw out, completely out of the blue.
"What?"
"You said you didn't belong to anyone."
"I don't know. You make it sound as if I'm just an object to own. I'm a person, not a bloody knick knack," she said with annoyance.
"Right. A person. I know that. But I don't want anyone else having you. Is that so weird? Isn't that what it's supposed to feel like?" he asked her curiously.
"Isn't that what, what's supposed to feel like?" she asked quizzically.
"God you're thick. What do you think I'm talking about?" he asked with frustration.
"I don't know. I don't even know what we are. Or what we're doing," she admitted with a sigh, as she pushed her food away.
"Look, I suck at this shit okay? I've never really been in a relationship. You know that. This isn't like with Pansy when I was fifteen. I was a bloody hormone bomb who just wanted to get some tits in my hands. This is different. Or at least I want it to be," he explained as he ran his hands through his hair.
"So you're saying you wish to actually have a relationship? Exclusively? And with me? You want to be my boyfriend?" she asked softly.
"God you really are dumb sometimes. What do you think last night was about? I was trying to show you how I felt. I didn't run off or kick you out. I was trying!"
"Oh. Well you didn't spell it out exactly. I mean, we said things were different, but I just thought it was because we'd actually shared more than three words together before we jumped into bed. I didn't know how you actually felt," she said defensively.
"Would I fucking be in this Godforsaken Ministry if I didn't have a bloody good reason? There are people here who still think my family are criminals, myself included. They don't exactly roll out the welcome mat at the gates when I show up. The first time, they didn't even want to let me in, but they had no actual reason for keeping me out, so they stepped aside. But it's like I fucking walked on hot coals to bring you lunch and spend time with you. Would I do that for just anyone?" he asked her exasperatedly.
"I didn't know they gave you a hard time at the gates."
"Yeah, this one bloke threatened to punch me if I didn't leave."
"Who? And why?"
"Love, you don't want to know why. And it doesn't matter who. The point is, I'm here. And I spent a fortune on this meal. So eat it," he told her with a small smile, pushing her plate back over to her.
She just smiled and picked up her fork again and began eating to please him. Then she looked up.
"So you want me to be your girlfriend? Really?" she asked curiously, the words sounding so foreign on her tongue. She felt like a teenager again suddenly.
"Unless you don't want to be," he shrugged, trying to pretend his very life wasn't at stake with her answer. He'd never put himself out there before and if she rejected him, he'd likely crawl back into his shell and never come out again.
"I think I want to be," she admitted after a few moments contemplation.
"Really?"
She nodded. "I do. I hated you sitting on Shelley's desk. And that wink? I could throttle you," she admonished him.
"I knew you were fucking jealous!" he laughed, relieved by her answer.
"Of course I was."
"Well don't worry, love. No one holds a candle to you. You're my one in five billion," he assured her as he leaned over and kissed her forehead.
"Your one in five billion?"
"Yeah, I heard some bloke say that on the telly. It suits."
"Robbing romantic quotes from the telly, eh?"
"I gotta learn what to say somehow because God knows I have no one else to teach me these things."
"Yes, you do. You have me."
He just leaned over and kissed her again and then he smiled at her. He was going out on a huge limb for her. But he couldn't help it. She'd done something to him. Shifted something inside of his brain. He didn't know how she did it. He thought his life before her was perfectly content. Yes, it was empty and often lonely, but that was easily remedied with lots of drink and meaningless sex. He was doing fine. And he never longed for anything other than what he had. Perhaps because he had no idea just what he was missing. But this girl shattered his fortress of solitude and contempt for the human race, and made him feel something completely new and foreign. He actually cared what happened to another person. Genuine caring. It was unheard of. But he was powerless to control the flood of emotions he'd held inside his entire life. But it was still a terrifying prospect. Caring for someone meant leaving yourself open to being hurt. That had never been an option he allowed before. But he also realized that if he didn't take the chance, he might miss out on something that was far better than the life he felt he deserved. He had to stop being afraid and take the risk.
Once they were done eating, they cleaned up the mess and sadly her lunch time was near to it's end.
"Thanks for bringing this. It was wonderful," she told him.
"Don't mention it."
"You want me to walk you out?" she wondered.
"Nah, you don't need to. I know the way."
"Well I'll at least walk you to the lobby."
"Alright. I wish you could just leave with me. Can't you take the rest of the day off?" he asked curiously.
"No, I can't. I have a meeting. But if you want to, you could come by my place later," she offered.
"You got a deal," he smiled at her.
They walked hand in hand up to the front, and Shelley spied how cozy they looked. But she kept her lips buttoned. She just glanced at their hands and then looked back down at her desk quickly.
"So, I'll see you later?" he said in parting.
"Yes, definitely."
"Alright. Goodbye then."
"Goodbye."
He looked at her for a moment, then he just dropped the basket and grabbed her and kissed her heartily right in front of Shelley and everyone else passing by in the lobby. He let her go and she just stood there in stunned silence for a minute as he picked up the basket and walked out. She caught her breath and turned to face Shelley, who couldn't stop giggling under her breath.
"What's so funny?" Hermione asked as she wiped her mouth discreetly.
"Nothing. Nothing's funny. I'm sorry. It's just, that was some kiss. Everyone was watching," Shelley informed her.
"Yes, well, glad everyone enjoyed the show. Now back to work, right?" Hermione said, feeling slightly rattled by such a public display of affection in her workplace.
"Um, I don't mean to be out of line or inappropriate, but you have a hickey on your neck," Shelley said trying not to burst into laughter.
Hermione grabbed her neck and panicked slightly. "Oh God. Is it really noticeable?"
Shelley nodded. "Very much so."
"Right. Lovely. Okay, I need my wand and then it's off to the loo. How long before my meeting starts?" she asked quickly.
"You have about ten minutes."
"Good. Okay. Plenty of time."
She raced back to her desk and fished her wand out of her purse. She started to head to the bathroom, but she was stopped by a colleague.
"Ms. Granger, I need your signature on this," he said holding out a parchment.
"Can it wait?"
"No, I'm afraid not."
"Fine," she said as she grabbed the quill and signed quickly, then handed it back. "There you go."
"Wait. I need your signature on these too. And also can you tell me when Burrows and Stewart are set for trial?"
She groaned and grabbed the parchments and then went back to her desk, her colleague right behind her. She signed her name and looked through her appointment books to find what he needed.
"What's that on your neck?" he asked curiously.
"What?"
"Your neck. It's a mark. Is that a hickey?" he laughed slightly.
"Please just don't. I need to get rid of it before my meeting which is in like two minutes now," she said feeling frazzled.
"Did Draco Malfoy give you that?" he asked curiously.
"Huh?"
"Well everyone saw him kiss you in the lobby. Everyone's talking about it. I mean, he was an undesirable," he whispered to her softly.
"I realize that. But he was exonerated years ago. He's not a fugitive nor a criminal."
"But still. It's a bit scandalous."
"Bill? Is that your name?" she asked him curiously. He nodded his head. "Yes, Bill. Do please stay out of my private business. It's not your concern. And now I'm bloody late for my meeting."
"Well perhaps if you want people to stay out of your private life, you shouldn't snog Death Eaters in the lobby," he said matter of factly.
"You know what? Just sod off. I've got work to do," she said, grabbing her briefcase and rushing off to her meeting. There was no time now to fix her neck. She just hoped her hair would cover things up enough to save her dignity.
She sat in the stuffy conference room and held her hand on the side of her neck, praying no one would notice what was there. So far, she'd gotten weird glances from a few people and others were whispering and smirking at her. She felt like an idiot. And she wished she'd never allowed Draco to visit her at work again. It was a bad idea. She should have stuck to her firm rules. No mixing her play time with work. It just wasn't right. It was no one's business who she chose to hang out with, but she'd made it everyone's business by allowing him to visit her workplace. She had been foolish obviously.
"Ms. Granger?" a man called out to her and broke her out of her trance.
"What?"
"I asked if you had the schedules we were just discussing. Were you not listening?"
"Oh, I'm sorry. Um. Yes, the schedules. That would be Lennon and James?" she asked not having a clue what they'd been discussing because she was so lost in her own thoughts and paranoia.
"No, we were discussing Adams and Jenkins. Do keep up," he admonished her.
"Right. Sorry. The two of them are scheduled…"
"Stand up please so we can all hear you," he interrupted.
"Right." She stood up and tried to pull her hair over her neck. "As I was saying, they are scheduled for trial on the 23rd."
"Perfect. Is there something wrong with your neck?" he wondered, noticing how she clamped her hand over her throat awkwardly.
"No, it's fine."
"Alright. Moving on then. Next on the agenda is Marksome and Thomas."
Hermione just sat down and wanted to disappear. She was mortified. She'd made an absolute ass of herself in this meeting. And people were still staring at her. God how she wished for Harry's invisibility cloak right now. Thankfully the meeting ended and she rushed out of the room, pushing past people and headed straight for the bathroom. She dropped her briefcase and pulled out her wand. She looked in the mirror and shook her head. Draco had really done a number on it. She look as if she'd been strangled on one side. What the hell did he do to her? She thought she pulled him away before he could do this much damage. She looked like Dracula attacked her and then set a Hoover on her neck to boot. She readied herself for the healing spell when two women barged into the room and startled her. She turned and looked to see who it was and it was two women she didn't know, thankfully. She tried to ignore them but they walked up to her anyway and stood at the sink next to her.
"That's some love bite. Who do you date? A vampire?" one of them giggled.
"Yes, he's a vampire," Hermione rolled her eyes at her.
"I heard a rumor you were snogging that Malfoy bloke right in the lobby. Is that true?" the other one asked curiously.
"This place is worse than school! Did someone send a fucking memo to everyone in the building about who I snogged?" Hermione asked with irritation.
"Nothing interesting ever happens here anymore since You Know Who was killed. What else is there to talk about it?" the girl shrugged.
"Well it's no one's business," Hermione scoffed and attempted to ignore them and do her healing spell.
"I heard he has a huge cock," one of the girls informed Hermione.
"What?" she asked, aghast at her vulgarity.
"You heard me. Is it true?"
"How would I know?"
"Oh come on, don't be coy. Is it really huge?"
"Oh my God. This isn't happening," Hermione said miserably.
"Just tell us! We won't say anything."
"Right. I believe that. Everyone here is ridiculous," Hermione grumbled and just ignored them watching and did her spell. Her neck healed up and she was presentable again. Thank God for magic, she thought to herself.
"Fine, don't tell us. We'll just assume it's probably true."
"You really want to know? I'll tell you. It's enormous. Like a porno star. And you'll never get a go at it because he's mine. And you can tell everyone I said so. Put up bloody posters on the bulletin board about it. I don't care. Now get out of my face. I've got work to conduct and don't have time for childish gossips like you lot," Hermione said as she picked up her things and stormed out of the bathroom.
She didn't stop walking until she got to her desk and then she slumped down and put her head in her hands. It was futile. Everyone knew her business. But she wasn't going to be ashamed of it. Why should she be? She was a grown woman and could see whomever she wished. And he may have a nefarious past but he was never convicted of a crime. What did it matter? She had to keep telling herself that or else she was going to panic and chicken out of the whole thing. She felt her stomach flipping and her flight instinct was kicking in. She just wanted a nice private secret fling. She didn't want the world to know everything. She'd hidden her world so effectively for years and now the worlds were colliding. It was terrifying. Everyone she knew thought she was a prudish, bookish, nerdy, cold fish. She was standoffish and aloof and incredibly proper. But now everyone was seeing parts of the real her. She was scared. She felt exposed. What would she do if people kept talking about this? Her façade had a huge crack in it now. And she didn't know what to do about it. She was freaking out on the inside and she could feel her heart pounding loudly in her chest.
"Are you okay?" Shelley asked as she approached the desk cautiously.
"What?" Hermione asked as she looked up startled.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"
"You ran by me so quickly I didn't have time to give you your messages," she said as she handed over a few slips of paper.
Hermione took them. "Thanks."
"Look, I know you always tell me to mind my own business, but don't let people get to you. For what it's worth, I'm rather green with envy," Shelley informed her.
"You are? You don't think it's awful that I'm involved with a former undesirable?"
"The key word is 'former'. He was found innocent. He's rather desirable now. He's on the list of the top ten most desirable bachelors according to Witch Weekly. Haven't you seen the list?"
"There's a list? And he's on it?"
"Yes. He's number three."
"Number three? I had no idea."
"Well I did. Why do you think I practically leapt down his pants when he showed his face here? Who wouldn't want a gorgeous filthy rich wizard like him? You're lucky. Word was he was the biggest player in town and would never settle."
"Yeah, he's not really the settling type."
"He seems rather smitten with you," Shelley smiled.
"Yeah, he does."
"Perhaps the beast can be tamed after all?"
Hermione smiled a little. "Perhaps? So I should stop panicking what others think of me?"
"They're just jealous."
"Thank you, Shelley. I needed to hear that," Hermione said sincerely grateful for Shelley's words of encouragement.
"No worries. I know I'm not your friend and you've made it clear that I'm to keep my nose out, but I just thought you needed a pep talk," Shelley shrugged and then she turned to walk away.
"Wait. Shelley. Look, I'm sorry I was such a hard ass and a bossy bitch to you. You are a friend to me. I just didn't realize until just now," Hermione said apologetically.
Shelley smiled at her widely. "You mean that? We're friends?"
"Sure. Why not? Now get back to work," Hermione teased her.
"Of course. But you know where to find me if you need to gab."
Shelley walked back to her desk and Hermione sat back into her chair. Maybe it wasn't so horrible to let other people into her life? She didn't know. But for some reason it felt like the tides were changing. Perhaps she didn't need two different worlds to live in? Maybe there was room for everything in just one? She was ready to find out. She opened up her desk drawer and pulled out the wedding reply card for Ron's big day. She sat there and stared at it for a moment, then she grabbed a quill and filled it out. Hermione Granger plus one, she scribbled out. She was not going to that wedding alone. And anyone who had a problem with that would just have to deal with it. She was done living her life in secret. She just prayed the world was willing to accept her as she really was.
To be continued….Please leave a review! I would love to hear more what you all think of this little tale. The feedback keeps the muse alive. Thank you all for following along.