Forty-five Nights

Well it's not the greatest ending I've ever written, but I think it's time to end it. The wedding, in my story, is two weeks away, and there really is no where else I can take them if I want this to fit in with the story of the book. So I hope I don't disappoint you too much. I kind of have an idea for an epilogue, but I don't think I can get it finished before the movie comes out. Thanks for reading! Your reviews make my day, so be sure to leave one!

Part 7

In the morning, Bella had a pounding headache. Edward would have found this funny, and just payment for her excessive drinking, if he did not feel so badly for her pain. He would never have thought it possible just two short years ago, but when she hurt, he hurt.

"Ugh!" Bella groaned as she sat up in Edward's bed.

He was already showered and dressed sitting on the bed reading. She pulled the sheet around her upper body, and rubbed her forehead. The nausea was just barely at bay if she did not move her head too quickly.

"Oh, my sweet girl. I'm sorry." Edward got up and walked across the room where he had a tray full of hangover remedies. "I have room temperature ginger ale, ice cold Pepsi, pancakes, black coffee, ice water, even a bloody Mary, but I really don't recommend more alcohol.

"I'll try the Pepsi." Bella croaked as she reached for it on the tray.

Edward got to it first and filled a glass with ice, and poured the drink for her. Bella took a sip, and felt the cold liquid as it traveled down her esophagus and into her stomach. You weren't supposed to be able to feel your food, were you? She handed the glass back to Edward, and lay her head back on the pillow.

He couldn't help but have a smile. This was such a human moment for Bella. It was one, he was sure she would never want to duplicate, but he was glad she at least knew what this human feeling was like before she traded in her mortality.

It was almost like Bella could read his mind. "Do you think if you changed me right now, this feeling would go away?"

Edward was suddenly serious. "No, but in addition you will feel like you are burning to death." He hated the reality that she was so willingly damning herself to. He hated the idea that she would have to experience the pain of transformation.

Bella sensed his tension immediately. "It was only a joke."

Edward recovered, "Honestly Bella. The best thing for you right now, would be the ice water. You cells have been depleted of their fluids though the absorption of alcohol. When they become dehydrated, a kind of toxin is emitted, and that is what is making you sick. The more you hydrate yourself, the better you will feel."

'Thanks Doctor Cullen…but if I barf up the water, that won't help any, will it?"

Edward began to cut the pancakes with a fork. "You eat some of these, then we will slowly sip the water; OK, Love?" He held the forkful of dry pancake to her lips.

Bella reluctantly opened up and chewed. She knew he was trying to do anything to make her feel better. And it struck her once again, just how much he loved her.

She managed to eat a pancake between sips of water and Pepsi, and she did feel a little better. Edward took the tray away, and lay with her, hoping she would fall asleep again. That would help her body repair itself. Time really was the only cure for a hangover.

After about an hour of holding his sleeping Bella in his arms, Edward gently laid her on the pillow, and headed downstairs in search of Emmett. He had some thing about which he desperately needed Emmett's advice

As soon as Edward set foot on he back deck, he could hear the smug amusement that Emmett was still thinking about hours after Bella's public display.

Emmett turned toward with a big grin. "Is the bride of Dracula sleeping?"

"Very funny." Edward deadpanned. "But I do have something to talk to you about, privately."

"Well you will be happy to know everyone's out. Rose, Alice and Esme went shopping, more wedding preparations, I think. And Carlisle is at the hospital, Jasper out for a run."

Edward was not sure how to start. He was embarrassed, but he knew once he explained the seriousness of his thoughts, Emmett would try to help.

"I'm sure you heard last night…well you know that Bella was somewhat intoxicated, and she…"

"Yeah, we heard."

"Well I think I might have taken advantage of her, not purposely, but it seems…" How could he explain to Emmett how he lost all control when Bella touched him, how he would do anything she asked just to keep her touching him?

"I mean she was just so insistent, and I think, well I know, I let things go to far. I compromised her, Emmett."

As much as he tried not to, Emmett could not help but laugh. "Compromised her! Edward, only you would call making love to your fiancé compromising her!"

"Oh, no…we didn't…well we didn't have…intercourse."

"Oh my God…you have got to jump into the 21st century, man. No one says intercourse."

Edward was a bit perturbed by Emmett's statement. "Well no matter what century it is, I am not going to use some vile slang for that activity. Besides that is not what happened."

Emmett gave him a look of disbelief. "Sure sounded like it was headed in that direction when we got out of here."

Edward was suddenly flushed with shame, well flushed mentally, at least. He didn't speak for a long time. Emmett was losing patience.

"Why are you torturing yourself, dude?"

"I don't even know how to say this." Edward paused. "I pleasured her with my mouth and she did the same for me. Edward sank into the nearest chair and bowed his head in embarrassment.

"Are you kidding me dude? I did not get that until the mid 80's when Rose read some article in Cosmo!"

"That's hardly the point Emmett. I think I have crossed a line, sullied her virtue beyond repair."

"Sullied it for who man? Do you love her any less?"

Edward was taken aback. "Of course not."

"Do you respect her any less."

"Certainly not. It's not about the esteem in which I hold her. It's that I promised we would wait. I promised her I would never compromise her virtue."

Emmett looked at him as if he had two heads. "Virtue. First of all, you are the only 'person' alive, or whatever, that still believes that a girl's virtue (as you call it) is worth preserving. To me a woman's virtue lay in her character, her thoughtfulness, her empathy, and selflessness."

Edward digested that for a moment. That was all part of it. But for him…Bella's virginity was all wrapped up in that package. She was thoughtful, and selfless. Never more so than when they were making love, or whatever it was you call what they did. Bella had integrity. She never waffled on a decision, or made a decision arbitrarily or lightly. She never acted against another person, or deliberately hurt anyone. And technically, she was a virgin. Perhaps Emmett was right.

"You're thinking that I'm right, aren't you?"

Edward smiled just a small smile. "What, you're reading minds now?"

"No, it just makes sense. Bella has her virtue. She will always retain it, especially in your eyes. She's your mate. Forever, man."

Edward let those words really sink into his being; she was his, she was perfect, special, one of a kind, and virtuous. "Thanks Em."

Emmet gave Edward a rough pat on the back. "It's all good, Edward. You two are meant to be.

Emmett left him alone, and Edward took a moment to reflect on his evening with Bella. While it was an amazing experience, one he wouldn't trade for anything, he was determined that it not happen again, at least not until they were married. He would keep his promise to her, make love to her, change her. But first, in two weeks time, Bella would be his wife.

He could hear that Bella had woken up, and he quickly made his way to her side. He could see a bit of her color had returned, and she looked more rested.

"How are you feeling."

"Better." Bella said as she reached for her soda and took a long drink.

"Let me get you another, and how about a nice hot bath. How does that sound."

Bella looked into his topaz eyes and smiled. "You are too good to me, Edward. I love you."

Edward gathered her up in his arms. "I wish I could express in words just how much I love you, Bella. You saved me. Before you, my life was so empty. I didn't even realize how empty it was until you showed me how full it could be. When I was without you, I existed in a never ending darkness. I could never be without you again. I live in fear that something will happen to you."

Edward held him as tightly as she was able. "You will never have to be without me. Please don't worry so much. In two weeks, you will never be able to get rid of me."

Edward smiled. "I'm drawing you a bath, Love."

The bubbles where at the top of the huge tub when Bella entered the bathroom wrapped in a sheet. Edward smiled at her modesty and was thankful that she was covered. It would make his resolve to keep her chaste until the wedding all the stronger.

She wrapped her arms around his waist and melted into his chest. She was still not feeling on hundred percent, and his cool body felt good against hers. She was not sure that relaxing in a hot bath was a cure for her ills, but she would try. Maybe if Edward was with her, it would be better.

She looked up into his golden eyes, " Join me?"

Edward knew that would only lead to one thing. "I'd better not, Love."

Bella thought for a moment. He didn't sound sure that he didn't want to join her. He sounded like he was denying himself again, like he was afraid of her. It wasn't like she was going to attack him in the tub. She just wanted to be close to him, not molest him.

While Edward bent to test the temperature of the water, Bella let the sheet drop to the floor. "Are you sure?"

For just a second, Edward's eyes were wide as he took in her beauty. Would he ever tire of looking at her, touching her, being close to her? He had forever, but it didn't seem long enough.

Bella sunk into the tub, and reached up for him. "Come on."

Edward looked skeptical and shook his head, no.

"I promise I will keep my hands to myself. I just want to be able to lean my head on your cool skin. It will make me feel better." Bella knew this would get to him. He could never deny her anything that could give her any amount of comfort.

Edward smiled and started to undress. Suddenly he was very aware that Bella may not want to see him in the altogether. Would it offend her to see him? He was so confused. When he was growing up, it was ungentlemanly for a man to undress in a lady's presence. But he was sure that the female doctor's at the hospital where Carlisle worked were not offended by the naked form.

He was raised to respect the delicate sensibilities of a fairer sex. But Bella wasn't delicate. Well, she was delicate to him. Delicate in her beauty, and her translucent, smooth skin, but her soft spoken resolve, that was very strong, indeed. Her heart, her mind, were all very modern, very resilient, not like the simpering girls he had gone to school with. Sometimes the duality of his existence was troublesome.

"What are you doing Edward?"

"Don't laugh." He said as Bella looked at him in confusion. "But is it okay if I undress?"

"Well I don't want you to get all your clothes wet. I'm sure Alice paid a lot of money for that outfit." Bella smiled, knowing perfectly well why he was hesitant. "It's alright, Edward really. You are beautiful to me, and nothing about you could ever offend me."

Edward smiled. It was settled then. He would just have to get over his silly mores. They just weren't appropriate in the 21st century. Bella leaned back to give him room to slide into the tub in front of her. She let him settle between her legs. If she wasn't feeling so dreadful, this might be incredibly sexy. She leaned her face against his back, letting the cool feeling seep into her skin.

"Forgive me…I seem to make a lot of mistakes when it comes to being close to you. It's just so new to me, this physical closeness."

"I like that you are always thinking of how I will feel. I mean I don't want it to cripple you, and keep you from expressing yourself, but it's nice to have someone care about me so much. Maybe we modern woman have seen too much. I think things must have been much prettier and sweeter in your youth."

"Things were different, that's for sure. But I wouldn't change a thing about you, Bella. You are the most precious creature I have ever had in my life, and your happiness is the only thing that matters to me. Now and forever."

Edward played with her fingers and massaged her hands and wrists as Bella took turns cooling one cheek against his skin and then the other. The heat of the water and Bella's body wrapped around him threatened Edward's hold on sanity. Bella's scent filled the steamy room, and Edward felt like he might lose control. He feared that unable to wait one moment longer, he would make love to her, and in her throws of passion, he would bite her succulent flesh, drink the sweetest thing he had ever tasted, and infect her with his deadly venom. NO! That vivid fantasy ended right there. He would keep her human for as long as he could. He would not damn her to this hell.

"Edward, what are you thinking?"

"Isn't that my line?" Should he tell her? What would his honesty cost him?

Bella laughed a little at the reversal in their normal roles.'

"Should I tell you honestly?" He paused. "I'm afraid it might scare you.

Bella squeezed him tighter with her arms and legs. "Just tell me."

"When you think of me changing you, what is that scenario like? Are we at home in my bedroom? Are we far from here, Alaska maybe?" He continued. "Will you prepare yourself by wearing comfortable light clothing and allowing me to give you a sedative or morphine? Will it be like a pre meditated procedure or a rash act that steals your life from you because I could not keep myself under control on our honeymoon night?"

If he could have gotten colder and paler, that last statement would have given him a chill and sucked the life from his face.

"Edward stop. I know you won't hurt me on our wedding night. I know it." Trying to lighten his mood, she asked about a clue she thought he had dropped. "Was that mention of Alaska a hint about our honeymoon? Is that where you are taking me?"

Edward brightened a bit when he remembered his plans for their holiday. He rather liked having a secret from her. She was always so intuitive. She guessed everything. Right from the first moment he met her, she could read him the way he read others.

"No. I will tell you nothing. But you tell me, how do you want me to change you?"

Bella didn't have to think about it. She had gone over this a million times in her head. "Well don't forget, I have been bitten before."

Edwards teeth clenched at the memory of James trying to hurt her.

"I know what the venom feels like, and it doesn't put me in the mood for romance. But I hope that we will be alone, in our bed, and you will be as gentle with me as you've always been. Whether you are making love to me when it happens or we are just lying together, it doesn't matter. After the bite, I'm pretty sure I won't know where I am."

Edward shuttered. ":I can't bear to see you suffer that. I want to keep you from any pain, anything that isn't beautiful and perfect like you."

Bella softly kissed his cool neck. "I wan you forever, and I will do anything to make that happen."

"I won't ever leave your side. Vampire or human, I will be with you forever."

"That's all I'm asking for. She leaned against his back again for a long moment. "I have to confess though I've fantasized about it happening during, well while we are making love, at that certain moment of uncontrollable desire. The feeling of bliss combined with you piercing my skin with your teeth, and your venom entering my body, the way every other part of you has entered my soul."

"You're romanticizing."

"I know. But it has a certain attraction, that classic vampire moment. It's very sexy!" She paused. "Have you ever thought about it? Do you ever romanticize it?"

Edward was afraid to tell her just the kind of thoughts he had about that moment. But he would not hide his true nature from her. He would give her one more chance to run screaming from him. "Bella, my every thought is for your well being…when I have even a fleeting moment where I want your…blood…I remember what it felt like to lose you…and I banish the thought. But yes…I have romanticized killing you…as sick as that is."

"No…Edward…I understand. Just tell me about it."

"You see for me the urges…sexual…and thirst, they are all bundled up into one irresistible urge sometimes. Sometimes it can be just about the love and the overwhelming feelings I have for you…but sometimes the compulsion for your blood enters my mind…and I just want to consume you entirely. I have thoughts of violently making love to you while I drink your blood." Edward lowered his head, ashamed of his admission.

Bella waited a moment for his confession to sink in. She realized it was not really anything new. It was exactly what he had told her that first day in the meadow. He loved her, he wanted her…in every way that a vampire could want a human…every way a man could want a woman. "So you are a real vampire after all, Mr. Cullen."

She smiled against his neck. Even tried to tickle his stone skin…but it never had the affect she desired. "Edward, don't be sad. I have always known you. From the start, I knew how you felt. Don't be ashamed. It's who you are, and I love who you are, so much."

Edward brought her hands to his lips and kissed them. "I love you."

The End (I think)