Another really long chapter. A lot of them should be around this general length from now on. Also be sure to keep on the look out for subtle foreshadowing there's quite a lot in this chapter that will at first seem like an unimportant detail that is actually a sign of what will be happening chapters and chapters away from here or is simply hidden in a seemingly meaningless scene.
Without further ado, I hope you enjoy this story, and please review, it'll make both me and DOF-san very happy.
Chapter 6, "Yr wyf yn dweud sillafu hwn, a Profi!":
Future England stood amazed.
Sure, he'd known that this was going to happen but he hadn't remembered until the very last moment and then it was too late to really do anything about it... not that he probably could have even done anything about it anyway. After all if he'd prevented it then what would happen to the current him and his memories?
Would his memories be overwritten? But if that happened then how would he know to do whatever he'd done to stop this England swap from happening? He didn't know the answer to that... and probably never would. Not that it mattered.
The real question is what he would be expected to do in the past until... actually he didn't know when he was going to be picked up. From what he could remember his future self was already gone when he got back... he'd always wondered what happened...
He gave the TV an odd look, contemplating whether or not he should turn it on (assuming he could even remember how)... he'd already seen most anything worth watching that could potentially come on, they were already considered 'classic' or 'retro' by his time and had been revived, remade, and holo-fied -many of them more than just once. He decided not to bother with the TV.
But then what else could he do to entertain himself in the twenty-first century? What had he done when he'd been his past self? He couldn't remember, how was he supposed to remember with all the paperwork he'd always had to do.
Paperwork... now that was an idea. But he wasn't so bored that he was going to resort to doing his own past self's paperwork, besides, he hadn't 'written' on real paper since the invention of holo-technology just after the Magic revolution... his handwriting was probably atrocious by now. The fact that he knew his past self wasn't going to do any of his future holo-work only reinforced his decision to not do any himself.
He glanced at the tea tray that his past self had brought only minutes before becoming temporally displaced.
"I guess I'll have a cup of tea... I can figure out what to do after that," He started to fix the tea but then suddenly paused, "I'm talking to myself... well, I guess I was before too, but there's only one of me now... and I'm still talking to myself. I must be going mad, I suppose it was bound to happen some day. It just took a few thousand years."
He continued to mutter to himself growing darker and more sarcastic in tone as he got back to fixing his tea.
… … …
Present england stood on the street corner where he had been left. He tried to orient himself, but found that very difficult with the future surroundings. And there wasn't even anyone to ask directions, the entire street was empty, and none of the buildings had doors.
"I guess I'll just have to wander around a bit." England told himself. He was known for his supposed habit of talking to himself, but he was usually talking to magical creatures. He rarely ever was actually talking to himself... apart from the past month.
He walked down the deserted street for some time. Eventually, he found a building with a door.
It was a teleporter shop. England remembered his future self owning a teleporting watch... and not using doors...
However, England had no money that would still be currency in this time. He looked around the shop at all the different forms of teleporters, and watched a person buy one with, what looked to be some sort of a credit card. Do they not use paper money anymore?
Present England sighed and left the shop, earning an angry look from the owner for not buying anything, and a confused look from everybody else for, unknown to him, walking.
He wandered the streets a bit more until they thinned out to a view of a mansion set atop a hill. His home.
"Finally!"
England ran up the hill as far and fast as he could until he got exhausted, but eventually he made it up.
Then was immediately faced with another problem.
Not using doors meant that they didn't use the front door either.
"Oi!" England rapped loudly on the door, "Let me in, please!"
After a few moments a familiar voice could be heard from the other side of the door, "England? But what are you doing inside the 'door'?"
"I'm not 'inside the door'! I'm outside the house, let me in."
"Well what're you doing out there, just teleport back in already if you want in."
"Aht- I don't have a teleporter!" England stammered angry that no one planned to let him in.
"How'd you get out there without your teleporter?"
England growled, "I walked. Obviously."
"You walked? Wow I knew you were old fashioned but this one takes the cake!"
"Ugh... Just bloody let me in!"
"How am I'm supposed to do that? You don't even have your teleporter with you!"
"OPEN THE BLASTED DOOR!"
"They open?"
"Yes, they open." England growled, trying to control his temper, "Turn the knob and push."
"I don't know about that... but I'll try..." After a brief moment the door started to creak open, "Holy- It actually opened!"
England grew impatient and pulled to door open, only to find that it was Queen Amelia III standing there, "Oh, I- I'm so sorry, your majesty! If I had known it was you, I wouldn't have been so rude."
"Oh you're back, I don't know why I thought you were England... you're his hot friend, right?" The Queen asked, though it wasn't really much of a question, as she ignored England's apology having not really taken any offence to begin with.
"Uhh... I am England, your majesty. I was before, also." England blushed slightly at being called hot... again, even if it was by his future queen.
"But you can't be England, you're too attractive!" She complained, "Besides, if you were also England then how come you two were able to be in the same place at once?"
"Ehh... We talked about this last time I was here." England said hesitantly, "May I come in, please?"
"Oh right, of course you may."
England stepped in, closed, and locked the front door, "Well, I do believe I'm stuck here for a while."
"I most certainly hope so," The Queen replied happily.
England blinked, "Why..?"
"Well you're just so handsome and... well..." She trailed off for a bit but then continued, "Well England won't admit it but he's been sick lately, he could probably use all the friends he can get."
"He's in the present in place of me. I suppose someone will notice." England confessed, "And... could you please stop calling me handsome...?"
"What? He's in a present? Who wrapped him up?" The Queen asked, not really registering England's request.
England squinted, "I assure you that no one 'wrapped him up'." England said, not quite understanding what the queen meant, "The Doctor accidentally switched us, and I don't think that he knows it."
"Oh, so the Doctor did it? Then it'll work itself out in the end," She replied cheerfully, "Until then, I get you instead of that boring old fuss-face?"
"Uh... I suppose?"
"Wonderful, let's have some tea!"
"...Alright." England couldn't refuse tea.
… … …
Having already finished off his tea Future England had no idea what he was going to do now. He'd even checked the TV (still boring), he was beginning to seriously think about doing his past-paperwork, but then there was a knock on the door.
"HEEEY! Iggy!" A loud, easily recognisable voice said, "Lemme in, dude."
"Of course it had to be him," Future England muttered darkly to himself as he got up off the couch and walked to the door, with a loud sigh he announced, "I'm coming!"
America greeted him with a big grin, and walked in uninvited, "So how are you, dude?"
"I'd be better if you weren't here," Future England rolled his eyes.
"Aww, but I like to come visit you! Iggy, lighten up." America said.
"Fine, what're you here for anyway?"
"What, the hero can't just come for a visit?"
"Lately you've only come to harass me about-... look, do you have a reason, or not?" England corrected himself.
"Nope! I just kinda felt like coming over," America said with a shrug.
Future England groaned and rubbed his temples, "Why did you have to be so annoying?"
"Why 'did' I? Iggy you're talking weird," America commented suspiciously.
"Well, I'm a little overworked, alright?"
America looked at him for a moment, noticing of course that he looked terrible, "Yeah I can tell, why don't you take a break then? Let's go see a movie or something!"
"Like I would go anywhere with you! Besides, I'm fine."
"Come on! We never do anything together!"
"And I wouldn't want to. I hate you." England replied.
"What? But you can't hate me! I'm the Hero!" America complained loudly, "No one hates the Hero!"
"I 'hate the hero'. You have no right to criticize me." England growled, tired of the obnoxious American.
"Eh?" America said, suddenly confused, "I'm not trying to criticize you or anything dude."
England squinted taking in how America looked, he definitely looked different the he did in the future. England sighed, trying to make himself remember that this was past America, but that didn't help, "Not yet."
"What? You're getting mad about something I haven't even done yet? Dude, that's not fair! How can you even know I'm gonna do something if I haven't done it yet!"
England's eyebrows lowered lowered in anger, "BECAUSE I'M FROM THE BLOODY FUTURE YOU TWAT!" England's temper exploded, "GOD! Do you know how grating your voice is?! Why, in no time line, can you LEAVE ME ALONE!?"
"What you're from the future?! That's Awesome!" America shouted excitedly, "Did you come back to save the world from bad guys? You can tell me, I'm the Hero after all!"
"DID YOU NOT LISTEN TO ME!? OR CAN YOU NOT GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK HEAD!? LEAVE ME ALONE! I didn't come to 'save the world from bad guys'! I'm stuck here! And in your eyes, I'm the bad guy!" England yelled.
"Dude, I don't know what I did in the future to rub you the wrong way, but I haven't done it yet so calm down," America said, shrinking back a bit from England's yelling, "Feel free to punch my future self or something if I've done something wrong but don't take it out on me when I haven't even done anything yet."
England breathed angrily, taking in America's surprisingly truthful words. Finally after a moment he gave up, and heavily sat down on the couch.
America sat down next to him, "So... uh... what are you doing here... er now?"
"...I came back for a vacation, but the Doctor accidentally switched me and this time's England when he meant to put me back where I belong." England said, still a bit angry.
"The Doctor huh... well that guy can be a bit weird," America said with a shrug, "I'm sure you'll get back to your time though, he wouldn't just leave you stranded."
"I don't know, my future self was gone when I got back. I don't know what I do." England looked to America angrily, "But don't think just because we can talk like this means I don't still have a grudge against you."
"Man, what did my future self do to get you this mad at me?" America asked, unable to contain his curiosity any longer.
England growled slightly, "I suppose it's more what I did."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm an empire... again." England said hesitantly. "And you don't agree with imperialism."
America suddenly stood up, his eyes wide with shock, he hadn't even really heard the last part of what England had said, "What! An empire! Why would you do that? Are you stupid!?"
"See? This is what I'm talking about." England groaned.
America furrowed his brow, he opened his mouth to shout again, to yell at England about just how stupid it was that he'd become an empire, but then just sighed and sat back down, "but... what if you lose it again..."
England flinched slightly, "I won't." England didn't want to think what would happen to his mental state if he did, remembering the first time, "Why didn't you yell at me again?" He asked trying to change the subject, and also satisfy his curiosity.
America surprisingly picked up on England's desire to change the subject and answered, "I figured that my future self must have done enough yelling for both of us. It's your empire, even if I don't agree with it I can't really complain if I don't even know the full story yet."
England took a hard look at America. He had never heard him talk like that about his empire. "I wish you would stay like this, but we both know how that turned out last time I said it." England looked away, he hadn't thought about America's colonial days in centuries.
"Oh... are you still upset about that?" America asked somewhat shyly.
"How can I be? It hadn't crossed my mind, until now, for at least 500 years..."
"How far in the future are you from?" America asked, getting curious again, "I don't think that the current you is quite over it yet..."
"3014 C.E.," England couldn't look at the American, "or 3014 A.D. in this time."
"So that's like... a thousand years? Whoa, that's a really long time," America replied.
"One-thousand and one, actually." England replied, still not looking at the American.
America's brow furrowed, "What? Is there something weird on my face?"
"No." England said, barely looking at America, "Nothing's wrong. I just-..." He trailed off.
"You just what? I'm not going to judge you so just go ahead and say it!"
"No! Ugh... why do you have to pry so much!? LEAVE ME ALONE!" England stood up and turned his back to America.
"I don't know! I just can't leave you alone, I don't really know why but, I think you shouldn't be left alone… that's the feeling I get," America said, he had also stood up but didn't make any effort to get in front of England.
England didn't move, he just stood there with his back to America, "Why do you have to always try to 'be the hero'? You have-... You..." England stammered, he couldn't blame him like he did future America. He was out of options with him.
"Well... someone has to be the hero, right?" America asked, "I mean if there's no hero who's going to protect all the little people who can't protect themselves? Sure it doesn't always go well for the hero, but someone has to take the role."
England suddenly turned around, "Well, I'm the big, bad, imperialist villain then."
America frowned, he wasn't really sure what to say. For a moment there was nothing but silent tension between the two of them, and then America spoke up, "You just don't want to be alone... right?"
England froze, but kept the same angered look, "What happens if I lose my empire again? That happens, I'm alone, and no one will be there for me. Not this time."
"Then why even have an empire?" America asked, "You and I both know you won't be able to hold on to it forever, something will happen... -the way you look right now, it might already be happening- you'll lose someone and then they'll all fall like dominoes. Why did you even try, if you think you'll be alone when it's all said and done?"
England seethed with anger, "IT'S ALREADY TOO LATE! NO ONE, NOT EVEN YOU, NOT EVEN FRANCE, WILL STAY AROUND ME WILLINGLY ANYMORE! I'M NOT LOSING MY EMPIRE! I CAN'T. IF NATIONS WILL ONLY STAY AROUND ME BY FORCE, SO BE IT."
"...England...You're just pushing everyone away..." America stated, unable to help being a bit surprised by England's outburst. What was the future like if England felt like he had to force others to be around him…. but America was even more worried about what had happened to his own future self to not have been trying to help England.
"Honestly, I suppose. When I had my empire the first time, there were other nations after you- after the 'new world'. But the world has been explored. No new nations this time. 'Let's just let mad old Englandrot' is what they'll say. I'll probably get locked up in a home somewhere. But you know what? I'm. Not. Letting. That. Happen." England said through clenched teeth.
"You're not alone!" America shouted, suddenly sounding angry, "Even if you don't get along with me in the future, even if some stuff that I don't know about has happened and I even think that I hate you or say that I do, there's no way that I would let that happen! I couldn't let it happen!"
"We'll see how that works out. Yeah, I see it now; Everyone walking away from me, and I reach out to you as a last hope," England scowled, "'Serves you right, England.'"
America shook his head and gave a faint smile, "Even if I'm angry at you I'd take your hand and I'd do whatever I could to help you... that's what heroes are for."
England's face twitched, "Really, really now? So that's what you did during the American Revolution? 'Took my hand and did whatever you could to help me'?" England waited for a response, but got none, "Well?!"
America shied back. He really couldn't think of anything he could say to answer that without sounding like a hypocrite.
"'Because that's what Heroes do.'"
Now America was getting angry, "Heroes protect whoever needs protecting! That was a time when you had everything! This and that are completely different matters!"
"Was it now? Gee, that sounds nothing like what the current situation is. I'm at a height of power, gaining territories, and I have everything." England said lightly sarcastic, doing a weighting hand motion between the two matters, "Nope. Two completely different circumstances."
"We're talking about what's going to happen when it all falls apart, in case you forgot."
"No, I didn't forget because it won't fall apart!" England clenched his teeth, "This, right here, is why I can't have a civil conversation with you in the future. This, right here, is why you'll leave me too."
America stayed quiet for a moment, fuming, "... Fine! You want me to leave? I'll fucking leave you to marinate in your grumpy depression! It was nice talking to you, hope to see you again sometime. Really. This was so. Much. Fun."
With that the American stormed out of the room heading towards the door, but not without saying one final thing.
"That future sounds stupid! I'll make sure none of that happens!"
There was the sound of a door slamming shut.
England stood there silently for a few moments, not noticing the hot tears running down his own cheeks.
"Why?" England chuckled, realizing what he had just done.
This conversation just now must have been the motivation behind America's adamant opposition to his empire in the future… if it hadn't been for this conversation, or if perhaps if this conversation had been a bit more friendly then maybe -though he still was bound to oppose the idea- the two of them would still have been on civil terms in the future.
But no. The conversation had happened and now America was determined to change the future… only to inevitably become disappointed when all his efforts proved futile. The two of them would argue and fight about imperialism and hypocrisy until eventually the negative emotions between them far outweighed the positive, and that would be when they began to avoid each other...
Sitting down on the couch he said, "Why am I so stupid?" England chuckled a bit more, "I'm the cause of my own problems. Maybe I need to be locked up."
… … …
England followed Queen Amelia III to a small sitting room. "Would you like me to make some tea, your majesty, or have you already made some?"
"I'll go make some," She replied with a smile.
"...Alright." England said, watching the queen skip off to make tea. Why is she so young again?
After a few minutes (but not nearly long enough to make proper tea) the queen returned and set a tea tray on the table with two good-looking cups of tea. She quickly fixed her own cup and began to sip it.
England quickly fixed his own cup to precisely how he enjoyed it. He raised the cup to his lips, but before taking a sip, smelled the hot steam coming off of it. It was black, British blend tea, but it smelled... off. Ignoring that fact, because it may just be the slight difference in how tea is made in the future, England took a sip.
...And immediately did a spit take all over Queen Amelia III.
"This tea is terrible! Oh..." He saw the damp queen, "I'm so, so sorry, your majesty. Let me get you something to c-"
"I'm quite alright," The Queen interrupted, and though she seemed perfectly civil England could hear the anger and bitterness in her voice as she got up and began to walk away, "I'll go wash up myself."
England sat terribly embarrassed, he couldn't help wonder why the tea was so awful, though.
He set down his cup, and got up to investigate what had happened to the tea.
England walked into a small kitchen and saw the cause of his distaste. It was instant. Why!? Certainly there is normal tea here. He opened the cupboards and found containers of 'tea' that went into the 'tea making machine'.
He searched the rest of the cupboards, silverware, plates, cups, a pot or two. Finally he came to a locked cabinet. "Why would someone lock a cupboard in a kitchen?" England said oddly.
It was a simple lock, easy to open. But why a lock, certainly there's a better way of keeping valuables safe in the future...right?
England looked around for something to pick it with. Then he saw slip of paper sticking out of the bottom of the cupboard, and pulled it out. It read "Here you nosy twat" and had a key taped to it. I wonder who left this. England thought sarcastically.
England took the key off the slip of paper, and unlocked the cupboard.
It. Was. Filled. With Tea.
Real tea.
England happily grabbed a box of Earl Grey, and promptly made proper tea for himself and the queen.
When he returned with the cups, Queen Amelia III had already returned.
"Going to try again are you?" She asked, clearly still a bit miffed after having hot tea spilled on her.
"I'm terribly sorry. I really am, it's just that... who drinks instant tea?" England placed a cup in front of her, "So, I made proper tea."
The Queen looked a bit surprised, "How on Earth did you get into England's cupboard? I've never been able to figure out how to open the thing!"
"...I used the key he left me.." England confessed, taking a sip from his own cup and smiling.
"Hm... I wonder why he'd do such a thing," The Queen smiled as she took a sip herself, "Tea like this is pretty hard to come by, England's been hoarding it away in different parts of the house since before I became queen, that old geezer's stash is probably a fourth of what's left in England."
England looked extremely surprised, "Wot? You mean to say they don't make normal tea anymore!?"
"Of course not, everyone's too lazy to brew it so why even make the stuff," The Queen shrugged.
England looked horrified. He couldn't imagine life without tea anymore. He may have been one of the last countries in Europe to get tea, but he was certainly not giving it up!
He silently sipped the remainder of his tea.
… … …
England had calmed down significantly since America had left, but he still had nothing better to do than sit around on the couch and stare at the ceiling. So that's exactly what he was doing when he heard a knock on the door.
"Another visitor?" England mumbled under his breath, approaching the door, "Yes? Who is it?"
"Oi! Arty, It's ya brother!" A loud Scottish voice said, "Open up!"
Him of all other people? England thought, letting out a sigh as he opened the door, "And what do you want?"
Scotland took a drag on his ever present cigarette, "Got stuck with the short straw. So it was decided that I should come and check on ya."
"Well I'm doing fine, there's no need for anyone to be checking up on me, I assure you," England replied coldly as he contemplated shutting the door in the Scotsman's face right then and there.
"Good, bye then. I really didn't want to be here anyway. Got more important things to do than be ya babysitter." Scotland started walking away, "Oh, incase you're wonderin', your Jessie was the one who told us ya weren't well."
"Of course he was..." England rolled his eyes ignoring that Scotland was saying that America was his girl. America's going around doing unnecessary things...
Scotland immediately nation hopped away. Of course he told my brothers.
England shut the still open door, slamming it a bit harder than he'd was glad that his brother hadn't stayed for long enough to start noticing that he was acting strange, but at the same time almost wished that he had stayed if only so that he would have something to do in talking to him.
He made his way back to the couch and plopped down lazily.
"Bonjour, Angleterre~" France popped up behind the couch, playing with England's hair.
England visibly flinched away from France, shouting, "Wh- what are you doing here!?"
"I came to 'drop by' and see 'ow you were doing." France said casually, as though it was entirely normal for him to be in England's home. He walked around and sat down gracefully on the couch next to England.
"But when did you- oh never mind I couldn't care less when you got here," England sighed, he didn't feel like arguing... at least he had someone to talk to now, even if it was a pervert that had just randomly invaded his home, again.
France smiled, "Ah, so are you alright, Angleterre?"
"Eh? Of course I am, what made you think I wasn't?" England asked, even though he had a pretty good idea what the answer would be.
"You look très malade." France replied sincerely, "Very sick."
England by this point was getting tired of people telling him he looked unwell, "I assure you, I'm completely fine."
France raised an eyebrow, "Are you sure?"
"Absolutely."
France looked at him unbelievingly, but then brushed it off and scooted closer to England, smiling.
England looked back at France and scooted an inch away from him.
France scooted closer until England had nowhere left to move on the couch, "So, Angleterre..." France put his arm around England's shoulder.
England flinched but didn't bother trying to stop France as he knew it would be futile, "So...?"
*Grope*
England immediately stood up, blushing a bit, "W-what are you doing?!" He wasn't sure how to react... it had been a long time since even France had dared to pull such a move on him.
France smirked and chuckled, "What is wrong, Angleterre?~"
"Y-you just... and I... uh..." England stammered incoherently.
France simply laughed his trademark laugh, smiling broadly that he could stump the Englishman.
"Why would you do that?" England shouted once he'd finally reclaimed his ability to speak in coherent sentences.
"Onhonhon~ What? Did you not like it, Angleterre?~"
"No. I most certainly did not!" The blush on his face begged to differ.
France smiled at the blushing Brit. He got up and started to walk towards the door.
"Wait... France before you go..." England trailed off.
France looked at him provocatively, "Oui?~"
"Make me an omelet."
France stopped smiling, "You're zat Angleterre!?"
"Yes, of course I-" He started to say but then he stopped himself, "Wait... you couldn't tell?"
"Euh... non..." France answered hesitantly.
"You're the only person that even knew that there were two of us, and you couldn't tell that we'd been switched?"
"...non... Y-You look ze same!"
"Finally someone who understands..." England muttered, thinking back on his own queen's complete inability to realize that while there may have been minor differences the two of them had looked fundamentally the same..
"Ah bien... you look sick, but zat 'appens often."
"I'm not sick! I'm perfectly fine!"
France motioned to England's torso, "Your body says otherwise."
"My body doesn't say a word to you!" England stated denying everything France had said.
"Oh, yes it does. It says it all zey time~" France chuckled, "And it is saying it now. Why won't you admit it?"
"No it doesn't! Nothing at all, you're just imagining things!"
France sighed in defeat, "Ah, zen au revoir, Angleterre." And the Frenchman has left the building.
England looked at the door, "And now I'm alone again..." his stomach growled, "And I still don't have an omelet."
So England sat down on the couch, once again.
And again, there was a knock at the door. Who now?!
"I'm sorry for coming unannounced, Igirisu-san," A familiar voice apologized from the other side of the door.
England blinked, sighed, and opened the door, pleased that it was someone he could actually talk to, "Oh, It's fine Japan. Come in."
Japan bowed his head politely as he silently entered.
England closed the door behind him, and sat down, for the umpteenth time, on the couch.
Japan sat down on another couch across from him, there was just barely a smile on his face as he stated the reason for his impromptu visit, "I was rooking through my kitchen when I found some tea that I thought you might rike to try."
England nodded, "Alright, why don't we make some, then?" England nodded to the kitchen.
"Hai. I will fix some right away," Japan replied as he got off the couch and headed to the kitchen. After a few minutes he returned with two cups of Japanese tea which he promptly set in front of his and England's seats before sitting back down.
England nodded in place of a 'thank you', and took a sip, "It's very good."
"Sankuu," Japan replied as he took a sip himself.
England sat there silently sipping the tea for a minute before Japan spoke.
"There is something different about you today, Igirisu-san..."
"And what is that?" England asked exasperatedly already knowing the answer.
"Usuary you would have tried to start a conversation by now," The asian nation replied.
"Ah well... excuse me?" England did not anticipate that response.
"Is it because you're sick that you're acting strangery?" Japan asked, somewhat blunter than he usually would have.
"Uh..." Future England tried to think of a good lie and failed, "... I'm not sick."
"Igirisu-san. I am old," Japan replied, "I have seen sickness enough times that I recognize it."
England looked at Japan oddly, he was the one acting strange here, "I'm fine, I assure you."
Japan looked at England with a piercing gaze but said nothing.
England shifted uncomfortably at being scrutinized by Japan.
Japan stopped looking at England and continued to sip his tea in silence.
England continued to sit uncomfortably, not picking up his tea.
"Gomen, I did not mean to make you uncomfortable," Japan spoke up awkwardly.
"It's alright. It's just that everyone has tried to convince me that I'm sick today, and I'm not." England said quietly.
"Everyone is just worried about you," Japan replied.
"Well, they don't need to be worried. I don't need their pity." England said a little more harshly than intended.
Japan was surprised by England's sudden harsh tone, "Eto... Am I being a bother?"
England looked to Japan as if he had never said his previous statement, "No... of course not, why?"
"Because you just said... eto... 'I don't need their pity'. I apporogize if I've been rude and hadn't realized..."
"No... no you haven't. I'm just a bit on-edge is all..." England confessed.
"I see, so I haven't done anything to upset you at all?" Japan asked with a calm smile.
"No..." England squinted slightly wondering where Japan was going with this.
Japan just offered a simple, "I see," before returning his attention to the tea.
England's tea remained untouched, extremely odd for him.
"..." Japan looked up at England again, "You should drink your tea before it gets cold."
England, again, snapped out of whatever was occupying his mind, "...Oh... right." He took a sip and set the cup back down, "So, what really brings you here, Japan?"
Japan cocked his head a bit at the question, "I told you, I found this tea and thought you might rike to try it. It is always enjoyabre to drink tea with you after ar."
England stared at him a bit, then took another sip of tea.
"Did you think I had a different reason?"
England shook his head, "Of course not." He lied.
Japan was even more confused now, "Then why did you ask?"
England opened his mouth to say something, but abandoning it, closed his mouth and shook his head dismissively.
Japan watched as England shook his head and found it very suspicious. Is he not going to even try to lie this time? The asian nation directed his attention back to the tea in his hand.
Both nations sipped their tea in another awkward silence for a bit.
"Igirisu-san... it's perfectery fine that you are rying to the rest of the world, but it would be better you didn't deny your weakness to yourself. Your ries wir not become you."
England eyed Japan oddly, "...I'm not lying to myself."
Japan looked at his watch, "Oh it's getting rate... I must go now. Ja ne, Igirisu-san." With that Japan gave a polite thirty degree bow and promptly nation hopped away.
England scowled slightly at being alone again, "...I'm not lying to myself... right?"
He looked at his still mostly full tea cup. It was cold now.
England frowned and picked up his and Japan's cups, and took them to the kitchen he mumbled to himself, "Maybe I am..."
… … …
"Hey you!" The Queen shouted rather unmajestically at England, "You said the Doctor switched you and England so you'll have to do his job. Fair enough, right?"
England looked up from examining several items in his future home, "Well... I am England... so I suppose that's fair, you're majesty."
"Good, we're in the middle of a war so I can't just be without an England," She stated with a smile as though England were plaything of hers, or perhaps a mascot.
"War!?" England exclaimed, standing up.
"Yes, war. That's what I said isn't it?"
"Yes, but with who!?"
"The Germans. It takes an awful lot of war to keep up an empire you know," The Queen said as if it were nothing.
"Well I know that... but Germany?"
"Well I got drunk one day and was hitting on that adorable nation Italy, next thing I knew Germany had declared war on England."
England mouthed words that no gentleman should say aloud and facepalmed.
"Anyway, you can take care of England's work right? The holo-work has just been piling up since he left," The Queen shrugged.
"I can't do those holo-thingys, your majesty." England said, taking a slightly complaining tone.
"Well, why not?"
"...I'm not all that great with technology."
The Queen didn't seem to understand the idea that England had no clue what he was supposed to do with the holo-work, "But it's very user-friendly, even if you're not sure how to work it you can just ask the holo-tutorial."
"B- but I don't know how to turn the bloody thing on, let alone work it at all!" England complained.
"Then go to the library and find a holo-book about how to work it, England always did stuff like that when he wasn't sure how things worked."
England opened his mouth to explain that he didn't know how to work any sort of future technology, but abandoned the thought, closed his mouth, and asked "Where's the library?" I must have kept some paper books, right?
"It's just three rooms down from this one," The Queen explained, pointing to the right, "The holo-guide's name is Arthur."
"Uh... 'holo-guide'?" England questioned, Am I that nationalistic that I have a virtual me?
"Man, you really are stupid, he'll help you find what you're looking for."
England scowled, but decided it would be ungentlemanly to yell at the queen for calling him stupid, "Thank you." He walked off to where she had told him, at least the door was unlocked.
England wasn't surprised at all to find that the library seemed to be shelves upon shelves of holo-books, he'd expected it but had at least been hoping that he might be able to find some good old fashioned paper books... but there didn't seem to be any.
"May I help you?" A voice England hadn't heard in centuries suddenly asked from behind him.
England turned around, "Ki-... King Arthur..!?" His eyes widened as he observed the figure now in front of him.
"I am not King Arthur, I am a voice interface," the figure replied, it was the king... but holographic, and slightly robotic sounding.
"...oh...really?" That was very disappointing. There were a lot of people England missed over the centuries. King Arthur Pendragon was one of them.
"Affirmative."
"...Well, will you please direct me to the paper books?"
The hologram nodded, "Follow me, sir," and began to lead England to a small door at the very back of the library.
England eyed the door, "Uh... in there?"
"Beyond the door lies the private 'book' collection of The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland," The holographic king stated.
"Alright, thank you, my k-...sorry." England frowned and tried to touch the hologram, but his hand passed right through, causing a disruption and a small static sound.
After a moment the hologram had righted itself and then disappeared, having taken the 'thank you' as a sign that it was no longer needed. Leaving England alone with the door... it was locked.
England sighed and shook his head trying to focus his thoughts on opening the door. It didn't even have a lock. How do you open this!?
There's no lock but it won't open... magic? But didn't my future self say that magic was illegal in the future? How long has it been since he's entered this room...? I guess it's worth a try...
England focused on the door, the spell wasn't going to be that hard to break.
"Aperire!"
There was a small clicking sound and the door creaked open.
England let out a sigh of relief as he entered the room. It was his old library in it's entirety, old bookshelves reaching the extent of the room filled with history books, novels, magical tomes, and dust. There were newer shelves as well on the end, filled with books that hadn't been written yet from his perspective... books he was very tempted to read.
But that would be bad.
He looked toward the magical books, he hadn't seen most of them before. Didn't my future self mention something about a magic revolution?
He looked over the shelves, and picked up a familiar magic book. A scrap of paper fell out.
What?
He picked up the paper and eyed it curiously, it was a spell. But he'd never seen such a strange spell before, it was completely different than the magic he was used to.
Scrawled at the bottom of the paper was a small note; You're going to need this, thank Alexander Ginger. -Sincerely your future self.
Alexander Ginger. England didn't recognize the name, but he assumed it must be someone that he hadn't met yet. Someone important apparently.
He looked at the list of ingredients and the procedure for the spell, "WHAT!? What kind of spell is this!?" It was extremely odd... and specific. A strange thing for a spell.
It was supposed to 'Turn German potatoes into scones'. What!? 'Scones'? ...Maybe it means 'stones'. Maybe I translated it incorrectly. Yeah, I'm sure that's it.
England looked back over the list of ingredients as he walked to where his basement had been, hoping that it would still be there even though magic was supposedly illegal. And thankfully it was not only perfectly in tact but also unlocked.
England immediately went about looking for the ingredients that were required for the spell, all sorts of strange things that his future self had apparently kept for Lord knows how long judging by all the dust.
Why all this stuff? Not even any candles! I don't think that this will work. England's spells typically used a magic circle, but this seemed... almost casual. To think, casual magic! Ha!
He chuckled, "This will never work. However... I can't change it. It's worth a try, I suppose."
England took the necessary ingredients and followed the excessively specific instructions to prepare the spell. Soon it was done, and he chanted an incantation that he had never heard before.
"Nid yw byth yn syniad da i wahodd yr Almaen draw am te, onid yw? Hyd yn oed er ei fod yn addo i fwyta y sgons ac yn yfed te." (It is never a good idea to invite Germany along for tea, is it? Even though he promised to eat scones and drink tea.)
What? England thought silently, but continued.
"Yr wyf yn dweud sillafu hwn, a Profi! Llawer o sgons blasus i'w bwyta!" (I say this spell, and poof! Lots of delicious scones to eat!)
England took a breath, concentrating.
"Rwy'n defnyddio fy mhwer i droi holl datws Almaenaidd i mewn sgons!" (I use my power to turn all German potatoes into scones!)
There was slight gust of wind, and a strange sound... and that was it.
England squinted, "That's it? That's it!? All that for nothing!?" England groaned, Maybe it worked... who knows? His usual spells were really flamboyant, lots of light and lots of effort, but this... this was nearly effortless, but not nearly as satisfying.
England sighed and picked up the book, spell paper, and put the leftover ingredients back.
He started walking back up to the library, disappointed when he heard Queen Amelia III.
"It's a miracle! The Germans are retreating!" The Queen shouted enthusiastically, "Did you do something?"
"Um…." England glanced at the magic book briefly, "Yes…."
"Then you, sir, are amazing!" She exclaimed, "Marry me!"
England blushed slightly, "Your majesty, we already discussed this, I can't marry you…"
"Fiddlesticks…"
England sighed, "Now, please excuse me, your majesty. I must return this book to the library."
"Alright," She sighed, getting back to whatever it had been that she was doing before she'd spotted England.
"Thank you." England walked back up to the library and placed the book back where he had found it.
But as he began to make his way out of the library England couldn't help but notice a large book labeled 'The British Empire- a history', he reached his hand towards it but quickly shook his head.
"No I shouldn't… I might mess up my future…"
"Oh c'mon~ You really want to know~" Sweet Devil England tempted, placing a hand on England's left shoulder.
"That's true… and maybe I'm supposed to read it, maybe that's why I'll become an empire," England thought aloud, listening to the sweet devil.
"No! That could cause all sorts of unnecessary paradoxes! It's an entirely bad idea." Britannia Angel pleaded, placing a hand on England's right shoulder.
England frowned, "Right… it might mess up everything if I know what's going to happen ahead of time. I shouldn't risk it."
"But come on!~ Aren't you interested?~ I mean, It's okay as long as you find out yourself, right?~"
"The Doctor did say something like that didn't he… it's not like I'm planing to change anything," England said, though the Doctor had never said such a thing to him. He began to reach for the book again.
Britannia Angel shook his shoulder gently, "No! It's the future! You don't want to give yourself the upper hand you're not supposed to have! What if you win battles you're not supposed to! It could change everything!"
"See?~ You could win more!~ A win's always a win, fair or not~ You know that." Sweet Devil England said smoothly.
"But what If by winning more I make this already terrible future even worse?" England asked himself- or rather his selves.
"See!?" Britannia Angel glared at the sweet devil, "You know that's not what I meant!" Sweet Devil England scoffed.
"Could the two of you be quiet for just one minute?! I'm trying to think!" England said, raising his voice a bit more than he meant to.
Both of the apparitions looked at England wordlessly, slightly stunned by his harshness.
After a moment England sighed, "I'm not going to read it. It's not really worth the risk, even if it might make this future better it could make it even worse. I'd rather that not happen, for my sake."
Britannia Angel smiled as he and an angry Sweet Devil England faded into nothing.
Cast:
England: DOF-san
Future England: Shared
Queen Amelia III: Me
France: Shared
America: Me
Japan: Me
Scotland: DOF-san
Sweet Devil England: DOF-san
Britannia Angel: DOF-san
Voice interface Arthur Pendragon: Me