The One Thing I Can Control
Chap. 7
Why was it me?
I must be fate's toy.
Broken, and going to the dump.
No one will ever hurt me again...
How many hours had they been in the room? Rinoa looked up at the clock. It ticked…and ticked. Maybe an hour or two? They had lost track of the minutes. Time passed, but Quistis' sadness remained stationary. Rinoa looked down to her who was restlessly sleeping. She looked so disturbed. Quistis had cried herself to sleep in front of them all. Rinoa tugged at Squall's jacket.
They all waited.
They realized they were missing their classes. But that didn't matter. It could be made up. Or not. Rinoa and Irvine looked at each other. Their important SeeD training would have to wait. No one was in the proper state of mind anyway. But Quistis was far more important to them than any class. Irvine wondered where Selphie had been all this time. But she hadn't missed much.
Quistis had gone through a vicious cycle. Cry, scream, sleep and awaken…Cry, scream, sleep and awaken. Now they were waiting for her to awaken again. And her insane raves to continue.
There was a squeaking of hinges, and Selphie along with Edea walked into the room. Four pairs of eyes looked up at them.
"Where have you been?" Irvine whispered to Selphie. He bowed to Edea. She smiled and returned the form of respect.
"We had Headmaster Cid and Dr. Kadowski look up some old records on Quistis," Selphie explained.
Irvine, Rinoa and Zell nodded. No one bothered asking why. They were too worried about Quistis now. Not the old her.
"What exactly is wrong with her?" Edea asked. Selphie had avoided that question the whole time she and Matron were together. Edea walked over to Quistis' bedside.
"Oh my…" she gasped, looking at the body.
Squall shook his head and wrapped his arms around Rinoa. This situation seemed so unreal. How did they let this happen?
"What happened to Quistis when she was younger?" Rinoa asked. She guessed Edea might have some idea. Zell and Irvine shuddered at the though. Selphie sat down next to Irvine and nervously tapped her foot. They waited for the response.
"We think she may have been abused…or worse."
The others felt a strange sense of guilt. It was that obvious. From the way Quistis had been talking. She might have seemed crazy, but they knew what she meant. Why hadn't she told anyone before? Solitary confinement was far worse that any embarrassment she could have ever faced.
"She kept it to herself all this time…" Zell mused.
"No wonder why she always felt she had to prove herself…she was coming from a place where she was nothing. That, or maybe she tried to cover it up. Or even keep herself busy, and push it aside." Selphie said.
Rinoa joined in on the thought. "But not telling anyone keeps everything bottled up inside. It keeps the person from being able to express things. It silences their spirit…and they can't tell anyone…for fear of rejection, or…" Rinoa sighed.
Quistis suddenly stirred in her bed. With Edea in front, everyone ran to her bedside. Quistis turned and lay on her back. Her fists clenched, and she began to move her mouth. Most of the time it was inaudible and incoherent. Matron held one of her hands and tried to awaken her.
"Don't, it's dangerous to wake up someone dreaming like that." Irvine cautioned.
But Edea didn't have to wake her up. Quistis opened her eyes, and upon seeing her nanny standing over her, she cried.
"Matron…please…"
Chap. 7
Why was it me?
I must be fate's toy.
Broken, and going to the dump.
No one will ever hurt me again...
How many hours had they been in the room? Rinoa looked up at the clock. It ticked…and ticked. Maybe an hour or two? They had lost track of the minutes. Time passed, but Quistis' sadness remained stationary. Rinoa looked down to her who was restlessly sleeping. She looked so disturbed. Quistis had cried herself to sleep in front of them all. Rinoa tugged at Squall's jacket.
They all waited.
They realized they were missing their classes. But that didn't matter. It could be made up. Or not. Rinoa and Irvine looked at each other. Their important SeeD training would have to wait. No one was in the proper state of mind anyway. But Quistis was far more important to them than any class. Irvine wondered where Selphie had been all this time. But she hadn't missed much.
Quistis had gone through a vicious cycle. Cry, scream, sleep and awaken…Cry, scream, sleep and awaken. Now they were waiting for her to awaken again. And her insane raves to continue.
There was a squeaking of hinges, and Selphie along with Edea walked into the room. Four pairs of eyes looked up at them.
"Where have you been?" Irvine whispered to Selphie. He bowed to Edea. She smiled and returned the form of respect.
"We had Headmaster Cid and Dr. Kadowski look up some old records on Quistis," Selphie explained.
Irvine, Rinoa and Zell nodded. No one bothered asking why. They were too worried about Quistis now. Not the old her.
"What exactly is wrong with her?" Edea asked. Selphie had avoided that question the whole time she and Matron were together. Edea walked over to Quistis' bedside.
"Oh my…" she gasped, looking at the body.
Squall shook his head and wrapped his arms around Rinoa. This situation seemed so unreal. How did they let this happen?
"What happened to Quistis when she was younger?" Rinoa asked. She guessed Edea might have some idea. Zell and Irvine shuddered at the though. Selphie sat down next to Irvine and nervously tapped her foot. They waited for the response.
"We think she may have been abused…or worse."
The others felt a strange sense of guilt. It was that obvious. From the way Quistis had been talking. She might have seemed crazy, but they knew what she meant. Why hadn't she told anyone before? Solitary confinement was far worse that any embarrassment she could have ever faced.
"She kept it to herself all this time…" Zell mused.
"No wonder why she always felt she had to prove herself…she was coming from a place where she was nothing. That, or maybe she tried to cover it up. Or even keep herself busy, and push it aside." Selphie said.
Rinoa joined in on the thought. "But not telling anyone keeps everything bottled up inside. It keeps the person from being able to express things. It silences their spirit…and they can't tell anyone…for fear of rejection, or…" Rinoa sighed.
Quistis suddenly stirred in her bed. With Edea in front, everyone ran to her bedside. Quistis turned and lay on her back. Her fists clenched, and she began to move her mouth. Most of the time it was inaudible and incoherent. Matron held one of her hands and tried to awaken her.
"Don't, it's dangerous to wake up someone dreaming like that." Irvine cautioned.
But Edea didn't have to wake her up. Quistis opened her eyes, and upon seeing her nanny standing over her, she cried.
"Matron…please…"