Author's Note: Some explicit content again, not too much though. If you are worried by any of the issues raised here you can message me and i can link you to sites that can professionally help with any...you know, sexual, kind of issues. I say this because i don't know how young some readers may be :) Anyway on a lighter note, i hope you like it :) and please review! xxx

"Ah!" Hermione bit her lip and felt her back tense against the cold floor. Ron shifted his weight and stroked a shaky hand down her face,

"Baby? Did I hurt you?"

"No…" She shuffled to a more comfortable position, "It's fine, try again." Ron kissed her softly and pushed his body towards hers once more, "Ow." It hurt more this time, so she visibly jerked away, she couldn't help it, it was a natural reaction.

"Ok, no." Ron muttered, delicately levering himself off her and kneeling up, he reached for his pants. Hermione shot up,

"What? What is it? Am I not- what did I do?"

"I'm not going to hurt you, Hermy, this clearly isn't right. It's not you, exactly, it's just-"

"Exactly?" Her voice came out louder, sounding foreign where they'd been whispering for so long. She began to shiver and, feeling awkward as Ron got dressed, reached for her underwear.

"Baby," He took her by the hands and kissed her, "I don't think you're ready, or we're ready- whatever- I just think, that maybe we should wait. I'm not going to run away," He laughed gently, "The other night was amazing and we went a lot further tonight, I think we just need to slow it down a little, you know?" Hermione nodded, a little reluctantly.

Ron stood up and turned away while Hermione scrabbled awkwardly for her clothes, she could have cried she felt so useless; but she didn't. She stood too, and kissed Ron on the cheek,

"I'm sorry." She said, forlornly.

"Don't you dare." He told her, looking right in her eyes, "It's no one's fault, sometimes it just happens."

"I'm going for a walk." She muttered by way of a reply.

"What? Back to the dormitory?"

"No, I just- I feel like a walk." She took a deep breath.

"Ok," Ron sounded uncertain, "Do you want me to come?" Mione shook her head,

"No thanks, I just want to be by myself for a bit, you know?" Ron half shrugged, like he didn't really 'know' at all, but was willing to let her go. As she pulled open the heavy door Ron called out,

"You still my girl?" Hermione hesitated of course you are, silly.

"Sure." She replied, with an attempt at cheery.

Hermione went down as fast as possible, taking to the staircases quickly to get away from Griffindor tower. She was visibly shaking and her head was spinning. Is there something wrong with me? There shouldn't be a problem when you try and have sex, he shouldn't 'not' be able to do it, what did I do wrong? Why does no one ever tell you what to do?

"Granger." She looked up and spun round. She'd just walked right by Draco, skulking in a dark alcove in the corridor, and not even noticed him. He stood up, only half-heartedly attempting to conceal his book behind his back.

"It's ok, I know, you read…so over it now." She look disdainful and made to walk on.

"Everything ok with your other half?" Draco sneered.

"You're such a hypocrite!" She yelled suddenly, making Draco jump back, suddenly looking defensive. "You're a filthy, lying, hypocrite."

"What do you-?"

"Oh please! You say you can't stand Lavender, couldn't even bare to walk past her, that she disgusts you. Then you sleep with her? That's ridiculous, beyond ridiculous, you're the most pathetic excuse for a guy in this school." She paused in her rant for a deep breath, aware that she wasn't entirely fair, but she needed a place to vent; Draco seemed like as good a place as any.

"Hold on," Draco took a step forward indignantly,

"No I-"

"Yes! Listen to me." He raised his voice and Hermione stopped, folding her arms. This 'venting' lark isn't actually helping at all, I feel more wound up. "With Lavender I never meant-"

"Oh let me guess." She began sarcastically, "You didn't realize it was her, you thought it was someone else…I don't know, maybe me? Or Ginny? Or bloody Pansy Parkinson? Anyone but her. God, because Lavender is so unrecognizable isn't she?"

"No but…ok seriously, at first I didn't know who it was who came out to join me, I just went with it, then after a bit she spoke, and I realized. I'm not going to lie, I went along with it for a bit, then she wanted too much and I told her I wasn't up for it- only ruder and more succinct. I didn't shag her." He finished, folding his arms too and frowning,

"You didn't?"

"A whole world of no!"

"But then…oh, she said you did."

"Yeah and you believed her? Always reassuring. Goodbye, Granger." He turned and stalked off into the shadows. Hermione stared at the floor. So Lavender lied, why am I not surprised? Also, I seriously don't care about them, they can do what they like, I have my own problems.

-*-

Hermione raised herself from the cold stone wall and stretched in the grayish almost-dawn. She'd gone for a very, very long walk and ended up outside, in the cold, by herself. She hadn't slept, at all. She ran a hand through her hair and sighed, it felt disgusting already and she'd only washed it the previous day.

Hermione walked in a daze towards the tower, doubting anyone would be up. Maybe she could sneak into the Prefects' bathroom; she'd always known the password. She drew closer to the stairs at the bottom of the tower and noticed a figure hunched there, apparently deep in thought. She didn't need to get too close before she knew it was her best friend, Harry. She walked over and sat down next to him, she could tell he was thinking.

"Need to talk?" She asked softly.

"You look rough." He commented, "Did you sleep? And, yeah, I wouldn't mind."

"No." She answered, "Did you?"

"Not much. Ron didn't say anything was wrong, but then, I didn't see him get in last night, so what happened?" Hermione cringed,

"Oh I hate this, I don't…I can't- look, you first. What's up?" Harry looked concerned,

"Ok," He said, unsure. "You don't have to tell me anything Mione, but if you're this worried then…" He trailed off and shrugged. "Mine's not that terrible if I'm honest. Me and Gin had an argument about her flirting with Seamus, only she insists she wasn't, I just couldn't help it- I felt so distant from her. It felt like everything we'd been saying to each other, everything we'd done was just pointless, it was a lie. And I've kind of been giving her time to cool off and thinking about whether she really was flirting, I don't know, was I over reacting?"

"Maybe not," Hermione replied honestly, finding some shred of sanity left in her brain to deal with Harry's problems, "Harry I know you, and your instincts are usually right." Harry nodded glumly.

"That's the only problem with her being so attractive, I can't keep hold of her. Everyone, well except Ron, everyone wants her." Hermione looked away, hiding the jealously in her eyes, wondering what it would be like for everyone to want you. "I don't feel good enough for her Mione, she never quite seems…satisfied." Hermione looked sidelong at him, he caught her eye and they laughed out loud, "Oh not like that, you know what I mean, in a bigger sense of the word 'satisfied'. Come on you, you look terrible, let's get you to somewhere you can sleep." He changed tact swiftly.

"Actually I was going to use the Prefects' bathrooms before everyone got up, come with?" He nodded and they stood up together, both feeling calmer and in safe hands as they walked in the opposite direction, the short distance to the grand, private bathrooms

Behind the huge bath tub was a row of six showers which Harry and Mione now made their way to. Hermione did 'eeny-meeny-miney-mo' in her head to pick a shower then turned to Harry slowly.

"I really am sorry, about Ginny." Harry nodded,

"It's probably just over reacting, we'll be fine. Now what happened with you and Ron?" Hermione took a deep breath, she felt like she was going to cry again, but she reigned it in. Come on Mione, get a grip.

"We were going to…um…there was this thing we were going to- we wanted to-"

"Hermione, if you're going to do it you should probably be able to say it." Harry pointed out,

"Ok fine, we were going to, or wanted to, have sex. But then I- I don't know if there's something wrong with me." She barely whispered.

"What? Why do you think that?"

"Well he tried, and he couldn't, you know…and I think it was my fault." She shrugged, attempting nonchalance and failing. Harry came right over and wrapped his arms around her, she was happy to be taken into his embrace.

"Mione, there is nothing wrong with you. It's just- well if you were nervous, and he probably was a bit too, and that just means that you tense up sometimes. Some days are just bad days anyway, it's not always going to work." He laughed lightly, "It's not quite like the movies, is it?" Hermione smiled a little, tucked away inside his chest. Then she pulled away and looked up to his honest green eyes,

"So you promise it's not me?" He nodded firmly.

He pushed her stray hair back from her face and let his hand linger there. Then he tilted his head down a little, curiously, inside Hermione was feeling the same pressing curiosity. Just to kiss, nothing more. So they kissed. Their lips pushed together not once but again and again, Harry's hand tightened around her neck, the other dropping below her waist. Hermione ran her hands up his chest slowly and then locked the round the back of his neck.

They didn't stop; they couldn't seem to get control. Harry pushed Hermione backwards, she was familiar with the feeling now, but she staggered groping behind her for a wall- it was a lot further than she expected. Eventually they crashed into it with some force, hands fumbling to remove clothes quick enough. Harry lifted Hermione easily onto the window ledge where she attempted to balance awkwardly. He pulled her jeans down to knee level as she tugged to undo his in return. Soon they were off too. The pair pushed awkwardly together against the wall, Harry's grip getting ever firmer on Hermione's skin, she dug her nails in.

"Harry!" She exclaimed, when she could catch her breath. "Before we, um, well…" She felt uncomfortable having to say it, "Protection." She muttered. Harry closed his eyes, then, very slowly, got off her. She slid down from the wall. Sensing a change in atmosphere Hermione tugged up her jeans and scrambled to do them up.

"I can't do this." Harry told her, his back turned as he lifted his damp shirt from the wet floor. "Not to Ginny, it's not fair." Hermione closed her eyes too,

"You're right. I should shower." She added, trying to jump the subject along. She listened to Harry crossing the room,

"Sorry." He called back before he left.

Hermione threw all her clothes off as quickly as she could. She went straight into the nearest shower, not the one she'd planned, shaking like crazy,

"Cold." She commanded it, and then under her breath, "Really cold. Oh god!" She almost yelled as the shower spray hammered down, freezing cold. She scrubbed vigorously at her scalp and then her skin, desperately trying to get the feeling of being dirty off her. "Oh god, oh god, oh god." She repeated, pressing her eyes tight shut against the icy waves of water and thumping her head against the shower wall. "What is wrong with me?" She staggered back and thumped into the other wall, sliding down till she was huddled, shivering, at the bottom of the shower letting the chill cloak her body.

"Hey, are you ok?" A voice yelled across the room.

"Off." Hermione demanded the shower, but didn't reply to the voice. Footsteps strode across the room,

"I said- oh holy crap!" It was Draco, and she was as shocked as him; he turned away quickly so he wouldn't look at her naked. Only now, listening to her breath, could Hermione notice she was crying. Draco walked away and then came back shortly, his back still to her but with one hand outstretched behind him with a towel in his grasp. Shakily Hermione stood and slowly wrapped the towel around herself. "God Granger." Draco looked at her sorry self, "How much can have gone wrong today, it's only just breakfast?" When she didn't respond to his joke his face fell serious, "I'll get you something," He told her gently, "I wont be a moment." And he left the room.

Hermione just stood and shivered, she'd never felt so confused or hurt in her whole life; she'd never felt so wrong. And she'd definitely never had no one to blame before, no one but herself, that is.

Draco reappeared and just looked at her for a moment, he bent and picked up her clothes when it became apparent that she wasn't going to do it.

"I called up the Room Of Requirements, just over the hall, there's no one about. I thought you might just want some time to yourself, away from… well, everyone." He cleared his throat, apparently embarrassed by his empathy for her, but Hermione didn't notice. They crossed the corridor, Hermione a lot less awkward than she would usually have been as she padded her feet across the stone corridor, leaving damp footprints.

When she looked in, she saw Draco's imagination couldn't have been all that brilliant when he conjured this. It was just a basic Hogwarts bedroom, only a little bit smaller: a comfy chair and a large bed with hangings, a chest, a large mirror and wash basin but no windows. There was, however, a small vase of primroses by the bed, and as Hermione looked more closely she noticed a box of tissues and some fresh towels- maybe he had put a little thought into it after all.

"Thank you." Her voice was hoarse, "It's perfect."