Nothing will ever be the same. They all told me I would move on. But how long has it been? A week? Only a week? It sometimes feels like it's been a day, and sometimes it feels like it's been a year. I don't get it. I'm so confused. She told me before she died that she loved me. She told me I was the best friend a filly could ask for.

How did she die?

That's what everypony wants to know. They don't say it, but when they try to comfort me, I can see it in their eyes. Burning in the eyes of Applejack and Pinkie Pie. Tentatively coming to the surface in Fluttershy's big blue orbs. Twilight Sparkle is more practiced in keeping her curiosity out of her eyes. She knows that I can see it, though. She knew it the minute she began telling me about Secret Keeper.

But as good as she is, I saw the curiosity in her eyes. Only once. Just as she was leaving, I saw it spark in her eyes. Like a mini firework, her eyes implore, "Tell me. Tell me. Tell me how the filly you love so much died."

And that's why I turned away from her.

How could I expect Twilight to understand?

I just thought… since she was probably the smartet of those six mares, she'd be the most empathetic. I knew Fluttershy would be too meek to understand. If I told her, she'd explode. She'd go tell everypony from here to San Anponio. Pinkie Pie would freak out. Maybe start sobbing or make me into cupcakes or something. (Reference joke.)Rarity. And then there's her. My own sister wouldn't understand. All she cares about are her clients and her stupid old dresses. No matter how much I try to help, she just turns me away. Says I make a bigger mess than I clean up. Says I ruin everything I touch.

Well, for once Rarity was right.

You wanna know how she died, Rainbow Dash? That's right. I know you're coming to try and comfort me next. I'm just gonna hand you this letter and then run. I'm gonna have a backpack ready. Some saddlebags. And I'm gonna run far, far away. I'm gonna forget this stupid town ever even existed. I'm gonna forget Scootaloo, who I know I'm going to miss the most. I'm gonna forget about Rarity, and how I know she wishes I wasn't her sister. Or at least that she didn't have to deal with me. I'm gonna forget Mother and Father, and how they praise me even when I'm horrible. Fake praise. I'm gonna forget Fluttershy and how she's always so worrisome. How everything I do around her has to be quiet. I'm gonna forget Pinkie Pie and her random bouts of emotion. I'm gonna forget Twilight Sparkle, who probably had the biggest impact on me.

I'm gonna forget Applejack. If I live near her, I'll always be guilty. Ditto with the rest of her stupid family!

And you know what? I'm gonna forget Apple Bloom. She'll be erased from my mind. I already planned it out. If I write this out, I'll forget her.

So here's how she died:

We were down by the river, just the two of us. Scootaloo's orphanage pals were on a field trip to Manehattan, so it was just Apple Bloom and I for the day. We were sitting on some warm rocks, sunning our fur. It was one of those perfect days, you know? The sun was shining, the grass was glowing green, the birds were singing, and the river was the clearest crystal-blue.

"Hey," I suggested, bored by just sitting there. "Maybe we should go swimming in the deeper part."

Apple Bloom nodded and stretched her front legs. She giggled and proposed a race. Before I could answer, she was galloping off over the sandy river bank. I knew that the bottom of Apple Bloom's hooves were like leather because of her work on the farm, but I live with Rarity most of the time, who prizes her stupid carpeted floors.

So I was slipping and stumbling on the sand, and I lost the race. Apple Bloom got there way before me, and had already jumped in. What she didn't know was that creeks shift. We hadn't come to this spot since last year, and where there was once a deep swimming hole there was now a gigantic, jagged boulder.

She landed on that boulder headfirst.

And all I could do was watch as my best friend sank slowly beneath the surface.

I swear to Celestia, I thought she would come back up. Maybe complaining about her head, and then we'd go home, get it patched up, get a bit of a scolding, and then go play some more. I waited for five minutes, staring at the water with the biggest smile on my face.

But she didn't come back up.

And the birds kept singing, and the sun kept shining, and the grass kept glowing, and the water was still crystal blue.

There were only two things that were out of place.

The little filly lying unconscious at the bottom of the stream, slowly drowning, and the other little filly running away, screaming a silent howl of agony.

XXX

So there you have it, Rainbow Dash. That's how Apple Bloom died. At age twelve. And it was all my fault.

- Sweetie Belle