CHAPTER SEVEN

Leah's POV

I turned the knob of the old shower all the way to the left, letting the icy cold water hit my skin. It was exactly what I needed to forget what an idiot I made out of myself tonight.

Moving more towards the freezing jets, I stood underneath the faucet, letting the water run through my hair, drowning out any memories of the last few hours that tried to surface.

How could you be so stupid? I questioned myself. Tonight was just one big regret; going to that dance did absolutely nothing for me, except re-establish the fact that I'm a permanent screw-up. I'll never be anything more than the laughing stock of La Push. I don't know what made me believe that Jacob Black, of all people in this hell-hole would give me a second thought. He had no problem sucking face in the middle of a crowded room with some girl he had just met. Humph, shows how much he really cares about you, huh Leah?

After about thirty minutes, the water stopped doing the trick, and I got out of the shower, grabbing a towel to wrap around my body. I haven't been to this place since I was a little girl, but I still remembered perfectly where everything was. My dad's old cabin deep in the woods was one of the only things I had left of him. Just being here felt like I could reach out and touch him.

I guess that's just another slap to the face, and another tally added to the number of men who left me.

I grabbed my pajamas – a simple purple cami and a pair of pink cotton shorts – and got dressed. It was late and all I wanted to do was sleep. I was so anxious to just forget this night ever happened, and more importantly forget Jacob Black. My heart ached at the thought…

I threw myself down against the couch, still drowning in self pity. This was so unlike me, letting my guard down so much, just to have it thrown back into my face. I know how pathetic I sound; especially after I swore I would never cry another tear for any man. I picked up the innocent glass vase minding its own business on the coffee table to my right, and chucked it into the stone wall of the cabin. It shattered instantly, echoing all the cracks in my heart. I had to laugh dryly at the irony.

In the midst of my self loathing, a soft noise diverted my attention: footsteps. Immediately, I jumped to the worst-case scenario, and I could feel the heat ease down my spine, a low growl forming in the back of my chest. The footfalls were getting closer, and the vibrating was getting stronger, threatening to overtake my body.

Suddenly, and with brute force, the front door swung open- revealing a half-naked, drenched to the bone…

Jacob Black?

Shock pretty much froze me to the ground, and for all the wrong reasons. Usually the first response to someone violently intruding into your home is to scream, or to even fight. But no, not Leah Clearwater. I was too busy watching rain drops race down his brawny abdomen to be bothered with any of those things.

Snap out of it you idiot! I shook my head, my version of mentally slapping myself, and came back into my senses.

"What the hell are you doing here?!", I screamed at him, crossing my arms viciously. Good, this is the kind of reaction I should have went with first…

In complete disregard of my threatening voice, Jacob waltzed right in, closing the door behind him.

I tried again. "Um, hello, care to explain yourself?!"

"I saw you leave -- " I cut him off.

"So, what? You followed me? You know that's called stalking, right?"

He pursed his lips and inched his way towards me, his eyes deep and serious. I felt the need to back up at his close proximity.

"I was just worried. I went to your house looking for you, but Seth said you just came home, grabbed a bunch of clothes, and left again. He said I might be able to find you here."

I put my hands on my hips, thinking about his words. I hated this stupid pack allegiance; surely that's why he was here. Right? Of course. I was a member of his pack, so he felt obligated to check on me, regardless of the situation.

"Okay, that still doesn't explain why you're here, Jacob." I brushed past him and made my way over to the couch, avoiding the broken glass spewed across the floor.

He turned around and followed me to my place on the sofa, sitting entirely too close. Does he not know the meaning of personal space? Geez.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I mean, I know you can take care of yourself, but, I mean, the way you left… I just thought you were mad."

"Well yeah, excuse me for not wanting to witness you and your little girlfriend swapping spit in the middle of the dance floor!"

I threw him one of my you're-so-disgusting-I-hate-you faces. And then got off the couch. There weren't exactly that many places I could go, so I settled for the corner.

"Oh, right! And watching you dance with Quil was just at the top of my to-do list! "

I could instantly feel Jacob's warmth right behind me. I whipped around, only to find him unrightfully glaring at me.

"What gives you the right, to come in to MY HOME yelling at me likeI DID something wrong?! You were the one with your lips glued to that Olive chick and - "

"Her names Olivia and I- "

"WHAT. EVER!! You know what? I don't even know why we're having this conversation. It doesn't matter regardless! I - "

"Leah, shut up.", he cut me off for the one hundredth or so time. "If it didn't matter, you wouldn't have run away, and I wouldn't have followed you. How long are you going to keep denying it? How long until you realize that there's something here? You can't keep running forever." He blurted out his spiel quickly and rushed, his sentences flowing into one another. His voice was sincere and almost pleading, and I tried hard to conceal my excitement from his words. In a split-second, his facial features changed, like he had come to the realization of what he just implied. "I mean, we're friends, right?"

Friends.

So that's what he meant. I tried to ignore the feeling of my heart dropping into my stomach. After everything that has happened, that's all that I was to him. I have no clue why I let myself believe any different, in that short moment of time.

"Yeah, Jacob. Always friends." I dropped my eyes and forced a smile, all I wanted to do was put an end to this conversation. The last thing I wanted to do was let him know how much more than just friends I wanted us to be. But friendships better than nothing, I haven't had a "friend" in so long. Who was I to turn him down, when he was offering me something so much better than I had? I have to keep telling myself that it will be enough, but at that point, I honestly didn't know. Being around him just made me forget…everything. Sam, the pack, my sucky ass life. He even made me forget that not even an hour ago I was dying to cut him out of my life completely. Maybe it was the way his hands, so big and strong, always touched me in the smoothest, gentlest way. Or maybe, how his eyes told me more than his lips ever could.

I stared up at him finally, after countless minutes of awkward silence. He was deep in thought, like he was in the midst of an internal battle. I could just guess what he was thinking: What now?

"Well, I think there's a storm coming, you should probably get going if you want to beat it home." I grabbed either of my arms at the elbow and held them to my chest.

Like clockwork, it began flash flooding and thunder boomed over the entire house; preceded by an electric blue flash that lit up the entire cabin. I halfway jumped out of my skin – immediately being reminded of the thunderstorms that so often graced my nightmares.

In a flash quicker than the lightening, Jacob had me wrapped up against his chest, chuckling to himself. "Don't tell me the all mighty Leah Clearwater is afraid of a little thunder?"

I pulled back and turned around, not wanting him to see the actual fear or flushness in my face.

"I was just kidding Leah, sorry. I didn't mean to offend you, I didn't think it was possible."

I forced a laugh. "I'm not offended, jerk. Thunderstorms just freak me out."

"I could stay. If you want, I mean." He grabbed the back of his neck and pretended to be really interested in a piece of carpet near his foot.

"Yeah." I replied back awkwardly. "It's raining and it's a long way back home. I don't need my alpha getting barbequed in the middle of the woods." He smiled his smile, that honest-to-God-perfect smile, forcing a grin of my own to surface.

"Do you want a towel?" The mood had subtly changed from extremely awkward, to only slightly uncomfortable.

I was lounging on the couch reading a book and Jacob was lurking in the kitchen. Luckily, my mom kept this place stocked up when she came here weekly.

He walked towards me with a gigantic bag of Doritos in his hands, and water drops still running down his chest.

I tried not to stare, but I'm only human – well, mostly.

"Are you checking me out Leah Clearwater?" He stuffed a handful of chips into his mouth and smiled out a wide, cocky grin that I wanted to just smack off. I wanted to say Yes Jacob. I'm staring at every rippling muscle in your upper body and wondering what they would feel like up against me, but what came out was "Ugh, are you kidding? I'm just watching you trail puddles all over my damn floor."

"Sure, sure. Where are the towels?"

"Hall closet, top shelf."

I heard some rumbling, and Jake came back into the living room with a towel swung over his back and a spherical, pink thingy in his hands.

"Look what I found." He threw the object up in the air and I caught it effortlessly.

"No way! I haven't seen one of these things since I was like twelve."

It was one of those dumb magic 8 balls that supposedly answered all the questions of the universe.

"I never took you for the type of girl who played with balls." Again, another infuriatingly cute grin spread across his face. I ignored his crude comment, and juggled the ball between my hands.

"Actually, this is Seth's."

"But… it's pink." He stopped smiling.

I looked up at him and we broke out into a chorus of loud laughter.

"I hope you're kidding", he finally said.

"I don't know, let's ask the ball." I shook up the old ball and asked away.

"Absolutely."

Another round of laughter erupted from between us.

"Alright, alright. My turn." Jacob jumped over to the couch and plopped down beside me, taking the ball from my grasp.

"Who is the better wolf, Leah or Jacob?" He shook the ball furiously and I about choked from laughing.

"Jake – you idiot – you can only ask yes or no questions! And stop shaking it like that, you're going to break it!" I leaned forward barely able to finish my sentence from the side-splitting guffaws that were raking my body.

"You're pretty when you laugh." I stopped laughing and looked up at him.

"What?"

"You're pretty when you laugh. You kind of glow." He didn't have any trace of mischief or insincerity on his face.

"How am I supposed to respond to that Are you saying I'm ugly any other time?"

A small smile played on the side of his lips.

"No. It's a compliment. Take it. It makes up for you gawking at me earlier."

I chuckled lightly and hit him in the arm with the back of my hand. "Whatever."

It was getting extremely late, and I was already exhausted. The storm had past, leaving only the soft pitter of a light rain. Jacob looked pretty whipped too. It was getting to the point of the night I dreaded the most: sleeping arrangements. Of course he could sleep on the sofa, but what fun would that be. Like he read my mind, he spoke.

"Um, I can crash on the couch, Lee."

"You don't have too. This thing's a beast to sleep on… the bed is big enough for both of us. What's wrong with two friends bunking together? And we're both practically grown-ups, and - "

"You don't have to convince me, Lee.", he laughed. "You had me at "bunking up"."

I blushed a light color and then nonchalantly walked to the bedroom, laying on my side of the bed, as he followed back behind me, a little slower.

I felt his weight lay down beside me, obviously being extra careful not to let our bodies touch. I smiled contently, still facing the wall.

"Night, Clearwater." He yawned and jostled to get comfortable.

"Night, Black." My eyes closed under the weight of the day's events, and I found myself drifting off to sleep, lulled into dreamland by the sound of Jacob's heart beating in pace with my own…

Jacob's POV

Falling asleep tonight was going to be impossible. There was no avoiding Leah now, or these new feelings I was developing. All my thoughts were engulfed by her, the yearning to touch her, to feel her skin on mine. I knew she would flip out if she had any idea of what was in my head right now, but even that didn't stop me. All too soon, my inappropriate lusting was interrupted by Leah's deep panting beside me. Her face was full of some emotion I had never seen before on her – some sort of deep passion. Without warning, she clawed my arm, digging her long nails into my bare skin. Not exactly the kind of touching I had in mind…

"Ouch!", I yelled out of habit, even though the pulsating burn was already fading away. Leah opened her eyes in response, wide with a new emotion.

"Oh my God! Jake! Are you all right? I don't know what happened, I was having a… a bad dream." She sat up in a panic eyeing my wound, which was already nonexistent. She moved her eyes back to the dark floor, her hands gripping at the sides of the bed. She looked nervous, maybe even scared. Hmm, musta' been some dream.

"It's nothing", I told her honestly. I rushed to her side and wrapped her up in my arms. What am I doing? I thought to myself. And why does this feel… good? What will she think? I prepared myself for the almighty Leah backlash. Unexpectedly, she hugged me back. I could feel her hot tears running down my body. Electricity pulsed through my every nerve. I'm pretty sure this wasn't the type of feeling you were suppose to get when some chick was crying into your chest for who knows what reason.

"You're okay now", I whispered into her ear.

"Yes, I am." Her tone confused me. She sounded… comforted – like she was in the arms of someone she truly loved instead of someone she barely considered a friend. Still, the tears rolled on.

"Do you wanna talk about it?", I offered. I wanted to know what was going on in her head. I wanted to fight the nightmares away, to make everything better for her. What the hell? When did I become Leah's protector? This was all so new, but at the same time it felt so much like Déjà vu. Jacob Black: Always trying to save the girl who didn't want to be saved. Could it be anymore ironic? I stared down into Leah's face. She was more beautiful than she had ever been. No makeup, hair a mess, eyes puffy. Gorgeous.

She was just so vulnerable, and so real. It was nice seeing her unguarded; so unlike the wolf-girl hybrid I was use to. And her lips… perfect and full. And so close. It took everything I had in me from crushing them to mine that very moment. And I wouldn't be able to stand the rejection if – no when, she pushed me off. She pulled away from me and ran her hands through her thick hair. I wonder what it felt like.

"It was …wrong. Everything about it was so wrong!", she muttered out between sobs.

"But it felt so right." This cryptic conversation was eating away at me. I was bewildered enough, I didn't have the patience for pointless trivia games.

"Lee, explain. Who was it about?" I felt my body move closer to hers. ' "You." Her whisper was so soft any normal person wouldn't have heard it. Me? Now I was in her nightmares? I didn't know what to say. I cocked my head to the side a little and stared at her with prying eyes. I shouldn't have been offended, but something deep inside of me stung from the accusation.

"Leah, come on. I know we aren't exactly best friends but I would never hurt you. You HAVE to know that. But if I'm the cause for all these nightmares then maybe I should go."

I stumbled over the last few words. They didn't sound right. The last thing I wanted to do was to leave this girl.

"That's just the thing Jacob", she huffed out. "I don't want you to. " Huh? I felt my face twist with confusion. What the hell is she talking about?

"It wasn't a nightmare, at all." She threw her head against my chest, and her warm tears started flowing once more. This time she let her small hand trace over the shape of my shoulder. What did she mean it wasn't a nightmare? What else would explain her digging her nails into my skin, or the flood of tears? Right as I was about to ask her just that, I remembered the strange expression on her face seconds before she awoke. The pieces were all falling together. Leah had not been scared before. Her so called nightmare had been the opposite. She was dreaming about me. – No, us. And it obviously confused the hell outta her. Join the club. Even though the pieces were finally intact, I still couldn't comprehend the situation. I needed her to clarify. Was it really possible that these foreign feelings that consumed me had transpired to Leah? Nope. I doubt it. I've never been lucky. Why would that change now? I reached out to grab the hand that was grazing over my shoulder.

"Leah", I began. I held her hand, wrapped tightly between my much bigger hand, and placed it on my chest. She was still looking down refusing my eye contact. I nudged her chin upwards. Unwillingly, her gaze locked with mine. The electricity was back, and it was threatening to shake my entire body. I stared into her eyes, and I knew at that moment that mine mirrored the same craving. They burned through me with a fire so hot, I felt almost faint. (If I wasn't naturally a toasty 108.9 degrees, I would probably be worried.) In that moment, that insignificant flash of time, I no longer needed words to tell me what was happening. Still, I found them rolling off her lips. Her soft, supple lips.

"I want you Jacob black."