"Dean!" Sam called out, leaning out of the motel doorway and into the crisp night air, "You want some pants?"

"No, I don't want any goddamn pants!" Dean shot back, slamming the Impala door as soon as he was safely inside.

A thoroughly confused but gradually compliant Sam pulled back into the motel room, a 'won't even ask' clearly plastered on his face.

Dean breathed out, fingers clenching the steering wheel. It was cold in the Impala, the leather a little uncomfortable beneath the bare skin of his legs, but he only barely cared. All that mattered was getting the hell out of there. Heat still pulsed through him and goddamnit, he knew his mind had finally taken him too far. His body confirmed that… hard fact.

With an unsettled groan he rested his forehead against the wheel, between his tightened hands. That – whatever insanity it had been – had felt inexplicably and so horribly good. It was like days... months... years of a pent up stiffness had been released by way of the sensation of Cas' lips pressed against his. A current of pleasure had swept its way through his entire body, taken him over, made him crave more and more of the nearness his dead willpower granted them. He'd barely kept himself together – and when did he ever slip like that over a damn kiss? Wasn't even second base.

But it was a kiss with Cas. CAS.

And then, to make everything even weirder, to have felt that feather-light touch gently brush along his back – it was like taking a frickin' tazer to the pleasure current, multiplying it to a surreal level. It surprised him enough into finally jerking away, and thank god it had, or he couldn't be sure what embarrassing thing would've happened. But oh god – it was Cas. HE KISSED CAS.

Ok, sure, that Cas was physically a man was strange enough for Dean. He'd never considered himself gay in any sense and this was definitely worth freaking out over, but he knew deep down it wasn't as big of a deal as Cas being a frickin' otherworldly being.

What would this mean, and what the hell did it mean that Cas had kissed back? It had come with a bit of leading – of course Cas wouldn't know what the hell was happening, being Cas - but Cas didn't stop it either, and if anything the angel had led them to this all along… with his initiated affections and all of that.

"Come on, calm down," he coaxed himself, willing himself to stop goddamn thinking before his head decided to spontaneously explode.

Cas reappeared in the motel room after a few minutes had gone by. He found it difficult to process what had just occurred, especially in regards to how he should be feeling about it. Feeling, he could obviously say, was more foreign to him than it was to Dean, Sam, and every other human on this planet.

But he knew he was undergoing something unpleasant. At least since Dean pulled away and proceeded to disappear in what Cas took as fear. What had been the matter? Had he done something wrong? He knew how humans appeared to enact their fond feelings for one another, and knew kissing was included among them, but he also had no experience because he wasn't from here. Maybe he had hurt Dean?

Dean had been the one to instigate it, so that couldn't have been the issue?

Sitting on the edge of Dean's bed, Cas rested his head in his hands. His brow furrowed as he tried to understand, as he always had to do with Dean in comparison to the world's overabundance of other plights.

"Where did you go?" he heard Sam ask, Cas lifting his head to see surprise on the man's face. The motel door had just clicked shut.

"To talk to Dean," he promptly replied.

"Just now?" Sam's eyebrows shot up.

"Not many minutes ago."

"So you're the one that made Dean run out of the bathroom in his boxers?"

"Yes."

"Huh. Well, I guess you could've picked a better time." Sam laid back down on his own bed – exactly where he'd been before the random escape occurred. So much for trying to get some sleep.

"I felt the need to get it out of the way. What was wrong with my timing?"

"Usually people like to be alone when they're showering," Sam said, fighting back a laugh, imagining the horror of Dean when Cas popped in to have a chat.

"He wasn't inside the shower. He was standing in the room with his eyes shut. He appeared at peace."

Alright, he couldn't do it. Sam let out a laugh while Cas continued to sit there stoically, no smile in sight.

"I'm afraid I can't share with you the whole story, but I fear I might have done more wrong than the timing," Cas continued through Sam's waning laughter.

"No, it's fine. I don't need to know," Sam chuckled, "But maybe you should bring Dean his jeans so that he doesn't freeze outside?"

"I'm not sure I'm the one—" Cas started.

"You can patch up with him whatever you might've said wrong," Sam said, apparently oblivious to the real happenings. "Maybe convince him to come back in here, too. All he did was yell at me."

Because he was at a loss when it came to Dean, and because this entire situation rendered him strangely despondent, Cas went along with Sam's suggestion and lifted himself up. "I'll try."

Music. That's what he needed. Dean started the player, not really sure what part of the Led Zeppelin cassette had stopped on the last time he left it—

'You've been learnin', baby, I been learnin'

All them good times, baby baby, I've been yearnin'

Way, way down inside, honey, you need ah

I'm gonna give you my love, ah

I'm gonna give you my love, ah, oh'

"You gotta to be fucking kidding me!" Dean cried, brusquely shutting it off. "Whole Lotta Love? Really? Baby, you're killing me. You're supposed to be comforting me—"

And in that moment there was no avoiding the jolt of shock that was Cas suddenly appearing in the passenger's seat. Dean practically threw himself out the driver's window, but tried to play it off cool no matter how stupid it looked without having something like his jacket to casually brush down.

"Planning on following me everywhere, Cas?" he gruffly expressed, letting his limbs settle again.

"No. I have your pants."

Dean watched as Cas lifted his arms toward Dean, a pair of his jeans folded up in his hands. "Sam said you would need these for the cold."

"I told him I didn't need these," Dean grumbled despite taking them anyway, since the last thing he needed was Cas holding onto something he wore.

"That all?" Dean asked, unable to look at Cas for more than one second. The angel was sitting there in silence, staring out the front windshield as if they did this all the time and it was all completely normal.

"Sam wanted me to convince you to come back into the motel room."

Cas was staring at him now, as if waiting.

Dean noticed for a moment before he took to staring at the dashboard. "I thought I'd sleep out here tonight."

"Am I the reason?" Cas questioned gravely.

Cas, the master of awkward, Dean thought, wishing that they could switch places only so that he could disappear into a ball of nothing. He avoided moments like these like the plague – feelings, no, those discussions were for Sam.

"Maybe," he forced out.

"I apologize," Cas said, sounding genuinely unhappy, and it was Cas' tone that had Dean rethinking his reaction.

"Hey, Cas… you didn't do anything. Don't worry about it." Dean was looking at him now, working past the one second, trying his best to not glance down at those lips he'd just tasted. Yet into Cas' eyes was even worse, and so was every-damn-where else. Everything about Cas was screaming at him to make it better, to bring him in for a hug… to carry on where they'd left off.

"I don't know how to partake in all of human custom, especially things of a sexual nature," Cas went on. "I didn't keep it human. I admit I did release my wings…"

"Hey, hey…" Dean tried to stop the guy. He was on a major guilt trip, and that wasn't exactly what Dean intended. He was the one who freaked the hell out, much like he'd been for the past week. "I didn't… I didn't mind it, seriously."

"May I ask why you stopped, then?" Cas asked.

His words hit Dean with a rush of warmth to all the places that had managed to cool down with a slough of prodding. Well, there was a wasted effort. And so was trying to keep himself from getting lost within Cas' whole self, sitting there with a face so curious—so lost when it came to all of this. When it came to him.

"I was stupid," Dean confessed. He knew he could've made it a whole lot easier by not bolting out of the bathroom on realization that 'danger danger, this was Cas, this was Cas!' Of course it fucking was. It always had been.

"I don't understa—"

Cas was cut off by a sudden yank to his tie and Dean's lips against his once more. Cas noticed immediately that he missed this – was it normal to miss something he only just experienced? He missed the feel of Dean's lips, the taste of them, the smell of him being so close. He missed Dean letting him close.

He closed his eyes this time, knowing now a little of how it worked. He felt the pleasure again, like static electricity jumping through his veins, his grace. Dean took his lips away every so often – not very far, for he could still feel the ghost of them – only to kiss again, the intensity growing. Cas could feel Dean's other hand behind his head, fingers curling into his hair. He could taste him now, Dean's tongue darting along one of his lips. And he kept pressing harder into the kiss, hard enough that Cas was affected by the force of it. Something leapt inside of him, into his throat, and unconsciously he whimpered.

Dean smiled against Cas' mouth before pulling away, getting Cas' stare in return. "I don't know why I did that," Cas murmured seriously.

"Usually that's a sign of liking it," Dean responded, holding in the part that involved him liking the hell out of that sound coming out of Cas. Deftly he turned to Cas' neck – a sensation that had Cas tilting his head, giving Dean better access - kissing along his scruff down to his collarbone. He noticed Cas' swallowing heavily, his breathing quickening.

"Nervous?" Dean asked.

"… Yes."

"Me too."

Except what the hell? – that was a first. With chicks he would've definitely sucked it up if there was a chance in hell he held nerves, but Cas had a way of pulling the undisguised truth out of him. "I mean, you know..."

"I don't know, Dean. Do I make you nervous?" Cas lifted a hand to the side of Dean's face, this time lowering his own head, meaning to return the kisses along Dean's neck. He found himself taking a longer moment to nuzzle against Dean's skin, his scent both calming and inducing faint fluttering within him.

"Cas, what're you doing?"

Cas sighed, Dean feeling the huff of warm air against his neck. "Wishing to experience every essence of your being."

"What?" Dean yelped, the words yet again affecting him as if touch themselves. Cas seemed to realize what he'd said and Dean could see him lowering his head.

"I didn't quite mean for that…" Cas was genuinely surprised at his own words. Much like the whimper, he had no way of stopping it. All of this was very peculiar. Very frightening. And all the same, very pleasing. "Do you trust me?"

Dean, confused by the change of direction, "Yeah, I trust you."

One of Cas' hands splayed itself against his chest, Dean remembering now that it was only skin against skin. For a second he thought he was going to be zapped somewhere – was gonna protest, too – but instead he felt himself being pushed backward. Going with the flow he shifted a bit; his back was facing the driver's door.

He was still confused, brows narrowed as Cas' hand kept pushing with a startling gentleness compared to what Dean knew Cas was capable of. His trenchcoat-bound self leaning forward the more Dean leaned back. Soon his head hit the bottom of the seat, and he realized he'd stretched his legs across the length of both seats and that Cas' knees were resting outside either side of them.

"Cas?"

"I'm here."

Cas fell over him now, hand propped against the seat just beside Dean's head. Dean could only think of his older thoughts, how he had envisioned such a scenario with Cas hovering over him, so close and yet not enough. His breath hitched as he stared up at Cas. They were such a dark blue now, almost black with the shade of the night, the only light from the streetlight feet away from the Impala.

Then, "Do you... do you know?"

Cas' head tilted as he looked down at Dean.

"My head… could you see what's been in it?"

For a moment Cas looked guilty, his lips pressing together as he glanced to the side. "I'm afraid I did venture there on occasion. As a canine, you see… I just wanted to feel more than the racing, pointless thoughts that form gave me. So yes, I did see."

"Well great, that's not weird at all."

"Do you feel safe?"

Dean swallowed again, wondering how each utterance from Cas could host such an impact, but then duh – angel. Or more likely it was exclusively Cas.

"I feel better when you're around, if that's what you mean," Dean mumbled a little too quietly, feeling himself shiver. He shut his eyes, an attempt to calm his rapidly beating heart before he had some kind of cardiac attack.

Then something far from a cure came. Cas' lips were against him. Warm, light kisses started at his neck and moved leisurely across his torso. Dean was shuddering again, unable to stop from biting one side of his lip.

The angel stopped at each of Dean's nipples, wondering if there was something special about them in this kind of situation, then settled on kissing them too.

Dean was breathless. He was trying not to, but this was Cas, and this was all so surreal, and each feathered kiss made him want to whine, but he bit back. The kisses moved further downward, and Dean squeezed his eyes shut tighter. And when the kissing reached his hips, an arm reached up to grip the top of the seat.

"Is this pleasant?" Cas spoke against Dean's skin, voice ghosting over his hips.

Oh god, why did Cas have to ask? Why did he need to make him talk? Of course it was pleasant. Dean was afraid what would happen the moment he opened his mouth.

"Yes… it feels good…" he exhaled.

"Should I…?" Cas queried, eyes shifting downward to the only spot covered.

Dean lifted his head, taking in the suddenness of the idea. He could barely stand the thought, and no, not in a bad way, but holy shit, this was Cas. A moan suddenly left him, his head falling back to hit the seat. "We can't."

"Why?" Cas was staring at Dean now, not hurt, but deliberating.

"I don't know, man… I guess… well, this is all happening pretty damn fast, isn't it?"

"I'm not familiar with the fast and slow of this."

"Trust me, it's fast. At least for me and you, it is." Dean hated that he was stopping this already. He knew it was like denying the guy all over again, but unlike before, this was for a different reason. Somehow, even getting to semi-second base felt too soon. Hell, their first kiss had happened just a little earlier, and now he was flat-backed in the car with Cas' mouth dangerously close to—well, this was Cas. This time he wanted everything to go... well.

Ah hell, now he was sounding like a girl.

"It's new to me, Cas." Dean used the hand that was on the seat to hoist himself into a sitting position, drawing his legs up from where they were resting between Cas. "It's definitely new to you. I'd just like to… take it slow, you know? You can savor things more."

Alert the media, boys and girls: Dean Winchester is taking it slow.

Cas was silent for a while, then nodded. Dean noticed the angel's eyes glance down to his own – well, to be fair, it wasn't only him that was aroused.

"Oh, uh…" Dean stammered.

"I have noticed that it eventually goes away," Cas commented.

"Yeah, yeah it can."

Without warning there was a rapping at the driver's window just behind Dean. "Guys?"

Shitshitshitshitshit was Dean's inward dialogue as he scrambled back to what might be considered a normal position in the car, his legs beneath the wheel as if getting ready to drive. "What?" he barked, looking out at Sam through the window.

Cas didn't really help. He was still halfway crouched over, sitting on his knees, but slowly he did unravel into the typical sitting position.

Sam seemed to have watched Cas' maneuvering because he didn't say a word until the angel stopped. "Uh… just wondering what's up. You both have been out here for a while…"

"So what?" Dean replied in defense.

"Dude, you don't have to get all worked up. What'd I interrupt, a pants séance or something?"

"Dean and I—" Cas began, but was rapidly cut off by Dean.

"We were just talking about stuff. Case stuff. Really, nothing big."

"Uh..huh…" Sam retorted, tongue against teeth as Dean fought to decipher if that meant he believed them or not. Probably not, but hell, fucking Sam and his timing.

"Look, I'm coming inside. Cas convinced me."

And he had nothing to worry about either, because as soon as Sammy showed up, he wasn't so excited anymore. Being scared shitless would do that. He swung open the driver door, forcing Sam to jump out of the way.

"Thanks for worrying about me, Dad," Dean glowered.

They heard the other door of the car shut as well, and soon Cas was standing near them. Panicking a little, Dean glanced down the length of Cas' body, but seeing no more sign of what they might've been up to, he was hit with a wave of relief. He couldn't stomach what would happen if Sam found out. Sure, it felt a little messed up, but come on, it was a lot for even him to process.

"You forgot these."

Cas was holding out his jeans again, and with a flush he hoped to hell was hidden by the time of night, he snatched them out of Cas' hands.

Only not before Cas attempted holding his hand.

In front of Sam.

Who noticed this time and appeared very, very thrown.

Dean managed to jerk his hand away in what he figured was a natural reaction, to which Cas at first looked woeful, but what quickly turned to what looked like… bitter comprehension.

"Did you just…?" Sam began.

"Yes, but I was mistaken. I was distracted thinking of something else… of home," Cas answered, making almost no sense, but that didn't matter because he disappeared in an invisible rush of wings.

Sam and Dean exchanged looks.

"Beats me," Dean said in a hurry. "I gotta get inside. I'm freezing my feet off."