Chapter Seven : The Gates of Madness
And as Sakura had predicted, five days after Kakashi had given Naruto the first pill, The blonde started feeling the pain coming. At first, he would just clentch his teeth, without saying anything. Kakashi knew he was trying to be strong, he was trying hard not to be a "burden."
"Are you okay?" Kakashi asked.
"Yes. Yes I am okay ttebayo", Naruto kept saying.
But Kakashi could see his hands wandering on his body, clutching his skin, his muscles tensing up.
Ma, here it starts, Kakashi thought.
On the second day, the pain increased drastically.
Kakashi woke up hearing whimpers. When he approached Naruto, he couldn't stand what he was seeing. Naruto's face was twisted in a mask of pain, and his hands were clutching at every part of his body, trying to rip his skin off.
"Naruto!"
Kakashi rushed forward and kneeled beside the bed, grabbing Naruto's hands, preventing them from scratching his skin. He had already ripped off some parts, and he was bleeding. The young man looked at him with panicked eyes.
"K...Kakashi...What...What the hell is happening to me?! What is happening to me ttebayo!" he cried out.
"Daijoubu, Naruto, it's the treatment. Your chakra is being reconstructed."
"God it...it hurts so much...it hurts so much sensei ttebayo!"
"I know...I know Naru-kun...Shh..." Kakashi said while caressing his forehead tenderly, cursing himself for not being able to do anything. He knew this would be hard, but there was no way he could be prepared to seeing the man of his life suffer so much without anything to ease the pain.
Naruto was struggling and he started yelling in pain.
"It burns! Kakashi...I'm burning alive ttebayo! I...Let me...I...I have to take it off...!"
"Naruto! Look at me!" Kakashi said loudly, tightly holding Naruto's hands into his own to stop him from mutilating himself.
Naruto's sweaty face turned towards him, and his eyes tried to focus on his sensei's face.
"You are not burning, Naruto, the pain is real but you are not burning. Hold on. You have to hold on!"
"Tear it...Take it...Take it off...I have to...TAKE IT OFF!"
Naruto whimpered in pain, all his body tensed up.
"Oh God why does it hurt so much..." Naruto growled.
As he kept trying to free himself from Kakashi's hands, the silver haired jounin decided that there was only one thing to do. He had to prevent him from moving at all. But he couldn't bring himself to tie him up with his ropes. By far, he prefered to bind him with his own body wrapped around him.
That's why he climbed in the bed with Naruto.
"Come here, come into my arms, shhh, I've got you." he said while wrapping his strong arms around the panicked blonde, blocking his hands against his chest, totally trapping him in his embrace so that he couldn't move anymore.
"I...Let me...Leave me alone...LET GO OF ME! YOU ARE GOING TO BURN WITH ME" Naruto tried to free himself and he struggled so hard Kakashi had to use all his strength to master him.
"Shhh, I'm not burning Naruto...I'm putting the fire out.. See? I'm putting it out...Shhh, I'm here, just focus on me. Focus on me, Naruto."
God he felt so useless. He felt so powerless. It was just like his father...just like Obito...Rin...Minato...he hadn't been able to help them. And Naruto was trapped in a living hell inside his arms and he couldn't help him. He had to wait for three more days. Three more days and he could truly help him. It seemed impossible. So for the time being, he held him tight as Naruto was whimpering and growling in pain, twisting in his arms, until, finally, after several hours, he fell asleep, completely exhausted.
Kakashi hadn't let go of him for a second.
As Sakura had predicted, fortunately, there were moments when Naruto didn't suffer too much. But the painful episodes were so intense that Naruto would spend his time sleeping, exhausted. Kakashi had to wake him up to make him eat and go to the toilet. He started throwing up. Kakashi held his hair each time, shushing him and rubbing comforting circles on his back, wiping the tears.
He even bathed him.
The first time he took Naruto's clothes off, he hesitated to take off his boxers. But then he told himself that he had to wash all of his clothes, so he hesitantly put his hands on Naruto's hips, feeling, despite himself, shivers running along his spine.
"May I...?", Kakashi asked very gently.
Naruto closed his eyes.
"Yes...But don't you watch ttebayo..."
Kakashi couldn't help but smiling behind his mask. Even completely out of it, Naruto still had his dignity to preserve. So he took his boxers off and quickly scooped the young man into his arms to put him into the hot water.
He had lost weight. He was thinner and lighter in his arms.
As Naruto was hiding his nudity with his hands, Kakashi quickly put a lot of soap into the water to hide his body with foam. Naruto understood what he was doing, and he gave him a look full of gratitude through his tired eyes. He looked like a sad kitten, with his whisker marks. He seemed so vulnerable. That made Kakashi's heart clench from a mixture of undestructible love and compassion. He had to prevent himself from bending over and putting a loving, tender kiss on his lips. He turned his eyes away to push back the urge, and then started to massage Naruto's beautiful hair and body. He would let Naruto take care of his intimate parts, while he took care of the rest. He knew the pain was never too far from coming back, and thus he knew he had to act quickly to put Naruto back into bed and be ready to hold him. But he couldn't prevent himself from dreaming as he was letting his hands wandering on Naruto's skin. He would have given anything to take his own clothes off and slide behind Naruto to take him between his legs, to encircle his chest with his arms and nuzzle his neck. He would start by laying tiny, loving kisses behind his ear. Then he would go down his nuque...biting him a little, while his hands would wander on his chest, then on his abdomen, then slide under the hot water to reach his...
Maa...Enough.
He would keep massaging Naruto's tense, tortured muscles, and all his body would shiver when Naruto would close his eyes and let out a relieved sigh at the touch of his tall, warm hands.
When he was done, Kakashi would pour water on Naruto's head and then go fetch a towel. Naruto couldn't stand by himself, so Kakashi would wrap him up in the towel, and lift him up from the bathtub to put him back on the floor. There, he would hug him tight to his chest for a little moment, closing his eyes, just keeping him in his strong embrace, before drying him in the towel. Naruto wouldn't resist: he would just lay his cheek on his friend's chest and listen to the calming sound of his beating heart. His arms around him were never faltering. It was so comforting.
Then Kakashi would sit him down on the toilet and give him a new pair of boxers. Naruto would put them on while Kakashi would be politely looking away, and then he would help him put on a shirt. And then at last, he would lift him back into his arms to take him back into bed.
He was doing everything for Naruto. And Naruto was devastated.
"I can't believe...I can't believe you...have to do all of this...I'm so sorry ttebayo..." he said, getting out of the toilet one day, and collapsing into Kakashi's open arms.
Kakashi lifted him up into his arms and craddled him tenderly against his chest.
"Don't you apologize, I already told you that. You saved my life, Naruto, that's why you are living Hell right now. And I'm here to help you through this."
"I...I would do it again..."
"What?"
"Save your life, ttebayo..." Naruto whispered before falling asleep again, his nose buried in Kakashi's neck.
It kept going on, and Sakura would come everyday to check his vitals and talk with Kakashi. Sai was almost always with her. When Naruto was awake, he was glad to see them, even though he was ashamed of the state he was in.
Although Kakashi, desperate, was telling Sakura how much Naruto suffered, she kept explaining him that she was confident and that his chakra was on the right way of being fully reconstructed. Then she would leave for her night shifts, again ordering Kakashi to call her if ever he needed anything. Sai would lay his hand on Kakashi's shoulder and tell him that he too was there should he need anything.
The pain kept increasing.
And on the fifth night, it got so intense that, as Sakura had foreseen it, Naruto lost his mind.
Kakashi was washing the blonde's clothes when he heard him wake up screaming. He dashed towards the bedroom and rushed at Naruto's side. His young friend's eyes were huge, and Kakashi felt as he was looking at a wild, terrified animal. His pupils were awfully dilated.
But that's when he opened his mouth to speak that Kakashi felt his heart stop.
"W..Where am I...ttebayo...Who...who are you?" Naruto whimpered.
God. He had never seen Naruto's eyes so lost. At this precise moment, Kakashi could see the pure, raw fear and suffering Naruto had buried deep inside himself, the fear and pain of an abandoned child, left to his own devices. Kakashi had never seen that fearful, desperate child. In the space of one single night, the light had flickered to let Naruto's darkest scars come to the surface, the proud, cheerful and brave man he had become had faded before the damned soul, bound to a terrible curse since he was born.
"Ma, it's me, Kakashi...I'm your friend...You're safe, you're in my home...", Kakashi said, tenderly caressing his burning forehead.
Naruto threw his head backwards and let out a horrible howl of pain.
"AAAAAAAHAAAAAA GOD WHY DOES IT HURT SO MUCH?!" Naruto cried, tears springing out from his eyes.
"All right, all right, hang on, I'm going to help you", Kakashi said, caressing his hair.
It was high time he killed the pain with Sakura's remedy.
Suddenly Naruto let out a savage roar, violently repelling Kakashi's hand. Kakashi's eyes widened when he saw Naruto's ones.
They had turned red.
"Naruto...!"
But the blonde couldn't hear him anymore. His teeth were coming out dangerously from his mouth, and he was snarling, his eyes wild, his mouth twisted in a growl. He was curling up against the wall, his expression fierce, like a tracked animal.
"Naruto, it's all right, I'm not going to hurt you." Kakashi said very gently, reaching out his hand slowly.
Please, let Sakura be right about Kyuubi being too weak to get out, Kakashi prayed. The sight of Naruto's red eyes and growing teeth were most worrisome. He wondered if he should call Yamato. But he told himself that if Naruto was already scared of him, he shouldn't have anyone else intervene or it could degenerate quite quickly.
No. Kakashi was going to take care of this alone. He had told Sakura he would be there for Naruto, and he would be true to his word.
"Naruto, listen to me. It's me, Kakashi. You're safe. I know you're in pain..."
Naruto kept looking at him, snarling like a beast.
His nails were growing longer too.
Kakashi saw an opening when Naruto whimpered again, his face contorted in pain, ripping the skin of his arms apart.
Kakashi took advantage of that brief moment to reach the bedside table where he had put the needle.
But he wasn't fast enough.
As soon as he approached the table, Naruto growled and threw his arm in the air. His claws reached Kakashi's arm and made a deep gash, making the man fall back against the wall, holding his arm to him.
Oh boy, that was going to take time.
But he didn't have time. He knew how much Naruto suffered and seeing him curling up on himself, tearing his skin apart, whimpering and growling, his eyes wide with madness was unbearable.
He hated the idea of using force on Naruto, but he didn't have any choice.
He had to act very quickly.
Ignoring the pain in his arm, he made quick hand signs.
"Kage bunshin no jutsu!"
Three clones appeared.
Naruto's eyes flared, and he let out a shallow, dark growl.
"Okay boys. NOW!"
The three clones dived on Naruto who fought like a lion, biting and scratching, his eyes full of a ferocity Kakashi had never seen. While one of his clones succeeded in slipping behind Naruto, wrapping his arms and legs around him, the two others were immobilizing his arms. The real Kakashi dived on the bedside table, opened the drawer and got the needle out.
He was sweating.
On the bed, the clones were struggling with a demonic Naruto, who was howling in anger, pain and fear. His strength was unbelievable, and his aura was growing darker and darker.
God, he's getting out.
Naruto threw one of Kakashi's clones against the wall so hard it made a crack. He caught the second by his throat and sent him fly into the room as well. And at last, with a scream of utter rage, he got free of the last one behind him by grabbing him by his hair, knocking him over his head, and planting his teeth in his throat, making him disappear in a poof like the two others.
Then he stood up on the bed, and with utter horror, Kakashi saw it at last.
Kyuubi's mantle.
"No...Naruto! Fight it! NARUTO!"
The bubbling, burning red fog was starting to envelop the blonde, whose eyes tinted with a hartred so deep Kakashi felt his heart freeze.
Kakashi prepared to conjure Pakkun to go get Yamato, thinking he had no other choice. Yamato was the only one with the power to stop a kyuubified Naruto.
But before he had time to conjure his nindog, Naruto let out a howl of pain and collapsed again on the bed. The fiery mantle seemed to fade out around him.
Sakura had been right: his chakra was way too disturbed. Kyuubi could not get out.
But Kakashi didn't have time to rejoice.
Naruto's body became horribly stiff, his muscles so tense Kakashi thought the veins were going to explode.
At his utter horror, , the blonde's eyes rolled up.
He started convulsing violently.
"Oh God...No!"
Kakashi rushed forward and threw himself on the bed, taking Naruto into his arms and preventing him from swallowing his tongue.
"No, Naruto...my love, don't do this! DON'T DO THIS!"
He was running out of time. He had to make the injection or he would die with Naruto.
"Kage bunshin no jutsu!"
Another clone appeared again.
"HOLD HIM STILL! RIGHT NOW!" Kakashi screamed.
"Hai!"
The clone obeyed his twin's orders and encircled Naruto from behind, making sure Naruto was in a sitting position. He pinned his arms at his sides and encircled his waist with his legs. His heart racing, the real Kakashi tore Naruto's shirt open.
"Hang on, baby, please, hang on..."he said, not even realizing what words were leaving his mouth.
Naruto's convulsions were getting worse by the minute, and he started drooling. Behind him, Kakashi's clone cast a panicked look at his twin:
"What are you waiting for! Inject the damn thing! We're losing him!"
Kakashi didn't need to be told twice. He straddled Naruto's body and raised the huge needle with both his hands. The sensation was horrible. He was going to stab him right through the heart. He never thought he would ever do such a thing to the love of his life.
"DO IT ALREADY!" The clone yelled.
And with a desperate roar, Kakashi plunged the needle right in Naruto's heart. It brought Naruto back to consciousness immediately. He stopped convulsing but let out such a scream that Kakashi thought it would haunt him for the rest of his life. But it was not over yet. Sakura had said he had to inject all the liquid, and there was a hell of a lot of it. While Naruto struggled, all his face contorted in pain, Kakashi, sweating hard, started to push the liquid into Naruto's system, making pauses between two thrusts as Sakura had told him. Behind Naruto, the clone was clinging for dear life, overpowering him into his strong arms, covering his hair with kisses.
"Okay, I'm almost done...I'm almost done, Naruto..."
At this moment, the whimper that came out of Naruto's lips crushed Kakashi's heart.
"Kakashi...Kakashi sensei...Why are you doing this to me ttebayo...I thought...I thought you were my friend...", he said, tears running on his cheeks, raising huge, betrayed red eyes to Kakashi.
"Oh, Naruto chan..." Kakashi said, his voice full of sorrow.
Damn it. He had to come back to lucidity right when Kakashi was planting a huge needle in his heart, straddling his body while another one was imprisoning him from behind.
"I know it hurts, my bab...my precious Naruto-chan, but I'm trying to help you. I'm almost done there, please...bear with me..." Kakashi said, holding the still half full needle with his left hand while he used the right one to caress Naruto's face and wipe the sweat on his forehead, the tears on his cheeks. Behind the blonde, the clone brought his arms up around Naruto's chest and held him tighter, with all the tenderness he was capable of. Tenderly, he wiped the saliva that had poured down on the blonde chin.
"Shhh, it's gonna be over soon. I promise darl...err Naruto-chan." he said, kissing his hair.
But then Naruto saw the deep gash on Kakashi's arm, and his eyes widened, horrified.
In that brief moment of lucidity, he understood he was the one who had hurt him.
And he burst into uncontrollable tears.
"Oh God...I'm...I'm so...I'm so sorry K...Kakashi tt...ttebayo...I'm s..."
He couldn't even finish his sentence. As his eyes were turning back to blue, a his teeth and his nails were going back to normal, the blonde started to sob inconsolably.
"Oh, Naruto..." Kakashi breathed out, devastated.
He took one of his clones hands to keep the needle straight in Naruto's chest, while he took Naruto's tear-strained face into his tall hands and brought their noses together.
"Shhh, it's okay, I'm fine Naruto. It wasn't you. Shhh, please don't cry...Please..."
He laid a long, tender kiss on Naruto's forehead, but the blonde was still shaking with painful, harrowing sobs.
"It's okay...it wasn't you..." Kakashi breathed against Naruto's skin.
He remained there for a couple of seconds, listening to Naruto's sobs, but soon he reluctanctly let go of him. He had to keep pouring the liquid into his heart. He took the needle back from his clone's hands, while the latter encircled his arms tighter against the shaking boy. He took over on Kakashi's soothing, and stroked Naruto's hair while he shushed in his ear, telling him over and over again that it wasn't his fault.
And after a few minutes that seemed like an eternity, the needle was fully emptied in Naruto's heart. So he took it off of his chest and threw it behind him, moving from his straddled position over Naruto's body.
"Maa, it's over, it's over...Shhhhhh..., Kakashi said, wiping the tears on his cheeks, Okay don't let go, he said to the clone, I'll get bandages for his arms."
"I'm not letting go..." The clone whispered, his eyes closed while he was rocking Naruto from behind, covering his hair, his ear and his temple with light, loving kisses.
The Copy ninja rushed to the bathroom, and rummaged through his cupboards, throwing everything on the floor, until he found what he needed. He could hear Naruto sobbing harder and harder in his clone's arms.
"God, let the product act quickly...Please let him rest, don't make him suffer anymore... I can't stand it." he prayed to any divine entity that could be listening to him.
Then he rushed back to the bedroom with bandages and alcohol in his hands to clean the wounds Naruto had made, tearing the skin off of his forearms.
"Yare yare! Your forearms will never heal at this rate..." he sighed.
Kakashi poured a little bit of alcohol on a piece of cotton.
"Okay I'm sorry Naru-chan, that's gonna hurt a bit. But you have gone through the worst now, I promise".
But Naruto seemed in another world. Once again, he had forgotten where he was and who were those men. While Kakashi was tending to his wounds, he was looking around, completely lost, and his entire body was shaking with heart wrenching sobs. After the hartred and the fury, his eyes were now nothing more than two pools of mental and physical pain. His tears seemed to be carrying the weight of so many years of loneliness that Kakashi almost thought he could see himself in them. The distress in his eyes was as vast as the most immense desert, it was vertiginous, devastating. Kakashi couldn't stand it.
Then Naruto started hallucinating again, babbling incoherently through his hiccups.
"I don't want to be alone again. Please don't leave me alone in the dark. Please...Stay with me...Don't fear me...", he gasped between long, heartfelt sobs.
For the umpteenth time that night, Kakashi's heart shattered to pieces. He exchanged an appalled look with his clone.
"Mattaku..."the clone said, hugging Naruto tighter to him.
The real Kakashi took Naruto's hand into his and just listening to his heart, knowing that Naruto wouldn't remember, he bent down and pressed his lips on Naruto's cheek, just at the corner of his mouth, closing his eyes, kissing him with all the tenderness he was capable of, pressing his masked face against Naruto's. He could feel the boy's closed eye under his nose, his tears under his lips, and Naruto kept shaking, gasping with sobs. Very tenderly, Kakashi kept laying long, tender kisses on his face, shushing him between each one of them.
He would have given anything to kiss his lips.
But he couldn't bring himself to do it.
Even if Naruto would not remember, he already felt like he was taking advantage of the young man while he was vulnerable and he hated it, and kissing him on the lips would be so symbolic that he couldn't bear to do it while Naruto's mind was so messed up.
"Shhhh...*kiss*...I'm with you, Naruto... *kiss*...Shhh...*kiss*...I will never leave you, never *kiss*...Naruto do you hear me? Please, hear me...I'm here, I'm right here...", he said, wiping his tears with his thumb.
It was not enough. Naruto couldn't hear him, he kept crying with such despair he was smashing Kakashi's heart to pieces.
"I won't hurt you I swear...I'm sorry...stop looking at me like that...all of you...please...I'm...I'm not a monster ttebayo...I don't want to be a monster..."Naruto hiccuped, new tears sliding down his cheeks.
His body tensed up again under the pain, as Sakura's remedy hadn't worked yet, and he winced.
"Easy, easy, baby..." Kakashi whispered, his heart speaking for him, stroking Naruto's hair.
Naruto growled in pain,digging his nails in Kakashi's hands, making him bleed again, but Kakashi didn't care. He would have given anything, anything to take Naruto's place in this nightmare. His own eyes were also full of tears. The sight of his most precious love trapped in that kind of suffering was horrible. But he refused to cry. He had to be strong for him, he had to be Naruto's anchor to the real world. He had to prevent him from falling into the pit of madness.
"Don't leave me alone...I don't want to be alone anymore...I'm cold...I'm so cold inside..." Naruto hiccoughed between his sobs.
His eyes were those of a frightened child who had been unfairly treated with coldness and hartred for years, letting him starving for a kind look, for a warm hand, for a gentle smile. He could see the little boy curled up on himself in an attempt to get the warmth the world was refusing him. He could see the innocent eyes which didn't understand the resentment, the narrow-mindedness, the ungratefulness of the adults. He could feel the darkness that scared him so much when he reflected himself in those eyes full of hartred and contempt.
But Kakashi was here now. And he would never let Naruto starve again for affection.
So he finished cleaning Naruto's wounds and put some alcohol on the deep gash on his own arm, wincing a little from the stinging sensation. Then he put everything on the floor and took off his shirt. He was dying to hug Naruto so tight his silhouette would remain inlaid in his skin forever. He hoped that pressing him to his bare skin and letting him breathe his smell, feel his warmth, would be as efficient in calming him down as it had been when he was in a coma.
"Come here in my arms. Come on." he said holding out both his arms towards Naruto, his hands wide open, offering him his bare chest as a shelter of love and warmth.
And as Kakashi's clone was tightly holding Naruto from behind, the real Kakashi embraced the blonde with all his might, crushing Naruto's face to his bare chest, wrapping his legs around him. Behind Naruto, the clone whispered tenderly in the boy's ear, wrapping his legs around him as well. Kakashi pushed his chest into Naruto's face, and the clone used his own torso to push the back of the young man's head and wedge his nose and lips between the real Kakashi's strong and warm pectorals, and Kakashi flexed them enough to craddle Naruto's face between them but without suffocating him.
"Okay I'm here, it's over, he said closing his eyes, breathe, breathe me Naruto, it's me. It's me, Kakashi. Shhh, it's okay...it's over...it's over...shhh..."
Then both Kakashis wrapped their muscled arms around each other to squeeze Naruto tight between them, so that the blonde disappeared completely into their bodies, his face wedged deep in Kakashi's chest so that he couldn't move.
"I'm here, I'm here, I'm here..." Kakashi kept repeating.
Naruto was still twisting, muffled whimpers coming from Kakashi's chest.
"I know, I know...The pain will be over soon...Shhh..." the real Kakashi said, showering Naruto's hair with kisses.
What he didn't know is that his smell and his embrace did reach Naruto trapped far within his own mind. What he didn't know is that in his delusion, Naruto was clinging to him with all his strength, and it did help him bear the pain that was making his body explode. In a world of blood and terror, Naruto was fighting against the fire that was overwhelming him. He was feeling himself being dragged deeper and deeper in the vortex of pain, making him lose who he was.
And he was clinging to the voice, and to the smell, the same voice and smell than those which had already saved him once.
"I'm here, shhh...I'm here..." said the real Kakashi.
Keep talking to me. Keep holding me. Don't let me fall.
"Maa, I've got you...shh..."said the clone.
They both kissed his hair again and again, without ever faltering their embrace, trapping him between their chests.
"Shh..I'm here..."
Naruto's body tensed up under a new wave of pain, and he let out a muffled scream in Kakashi's chest.
The fire was dragging him down again. It was attacking his brain, crushing him down.
"It's okay, it's okay...It will be over soon...Sakura's remedy will ease the pain any time now...Hold on...I've got you in my arms, I've got you."
He felt overwhelmed by darkness again. He was fading out.
"I don't want to disappear...Don't let me disappear...", Naruto managed to say in a muffled whisper.
And Kakashi pulled down his mask to crush his bare lips on Naruto's ear, kissing him with all his heart.
"I'm holding you tight in my arms, you're not going anywhere. I've got four arms and two chests to hold you here. Nothing can get you in there. And I won't let you go, ever." he said in his ear, running his hands through his hair. He hugged him tighter and keept kissing his hair, his ear, his temple, rocking him, shushing him, not leaving a single space of air between them, and behind Naruto, Kakashi's clone was doing the same.
And it worked.
In his prison of pain, where he had lost his entire identity, Naruto finally saw something, far, far away.
"Who am I..."
" Your name is Uzumaki Naruto..."
The light was coming closer.
My name...Uzumaki Naruto...
Yes...Yes...I remember.
"What am I..."
"You are my friend, my family..."
I have a friend, a family.
I have someone to love, and who loves me in return.
The pain was starting to fade out before the light which was slowly engulfing Naruto, bringing him back from oblivion.
"Where am I..."
"I'm holding you tight into my chest, and we are in my home which is your home."
My home...
That smell...That voice...
I remember you...
I remember your name...
And suddenly his heart made a lurch.
Even before he asked, he knew the answer.
He remembered why he felt so safe in his arms, why he loved his smell so much, why he knew he could nestle deep within his chest.
He remembered why he loved his voice so much.
"I don't want to forget you, I wan't to stay with you", he had cried once, when that man had saved him from the darkness.
"In time, you will remember", the voice had answered.
And now he remembered.
He remembered who that man was.
"Who...Who are you..."
"I am Hatake Kakashi, I am your friend, your family..."
And you are my everything, Kakashi sighed in his mind.
You are my absolute everything, he thought, kissing his hair, burying his face in it.
And in Naruto's world, the light finally won, and his heart cried with emotion.
Kakashi.
And clinging to Kakashi, burying his face into his pectorals, breathing his smell until he could drown in it, Naruto fell asleep, knowing that this time, he would remember.
In the real world, it had taken at least two hours for the pain to fade out. Kakashi could feel Naruto calm down gradually, while he and his clone kept hugging him without ever weakening. When finally, Naruto's sobs had died down, replaced by a regular, steady breathing that was slowly caressing the valley between Kakashi's muscled pectorals, the silver-haired jounin let out a long sigh. God he was exhausted.
But it was over.
Naruto had gone through the worst.
He raised his head and smiled to his clone.
"Ma, we did a good job there."
"Hai, captain...But that was close. I really thought Kyuubi was getting out for a moment there", the clone answered.
"Hai...I'm glad Sakura was right. It would have been such a mess..."
And Naruto would certainly have died, he thought painfully, kissing the sleeping blonde's forehead while Naruto was slightly snoring inside his chest.
"You can go now. I'm going to sleep for entire days with that beautiful young man in my arms." Kakashi said.
"Wakatta yo. Take care of him for me, all right?"
"Forever." Kakashi whispered.
The clone smiled and disappeared in a poof.
Slowly, Kakashi pulled back a little, releasing Naruto's face from his pectorals. Naruto whimpered a little in his sleep, wrapping his arms around Kakashi to keep his face buried in his warmth.
"Hang on...", Kakashi murmured.
He took his shirt and tenderly wiped the tears, snot and saliva on his Naruto's face. Then he dried his own drenched chest with the shirt, before throwing it on the ground and turning back his attention on Naruto.
"Okay, all set for the night. Come back here.", Kakashi cooed.
He tucked Naruto's face back between his pectorals, before laying down in the bed, taking him with him. There, both men wrapped themselves around each other, Naruto unconsiously clinging to him with all his strength, and Kakashi kissing his hair, his temple and his ear for long minutes. He had missed spending entire nights hugging Naruto to him, his nose and lips buried deep in his skin, right on top of his beating heart. As if he was completely his. As if nothing could ever happen to that precious being while he was hidden there, in his chest. He kissed his temple again, then pulled his mask back up, and laid his cheek on his hair. He held him with so much tenderness a mother would have been jealous, and he smiled when he felt Naruto sigh deeply inside his chest.
And with that smile on his lips, he followed his love in the land of dreams, not realizing that Naruto had sighed something, deep within his chest, whispering to Kakashi's heart.
He had sighed four words.
Four very specific words.
...
"I love you, Kakashi".