Chapter seven- confessions

I got into my car and started driving for a while i don't know where i would want to go as i was driving i spotted a park. Looks like that's where I'll be all day. I parked my car next to the children's playground. Once i got out more tears came, I am just glad that there's no one here to see me like this. I went over to one of the swings out of the two that were there. What a typical thing to do, i thought.

As i sat there for how long i started thinking about all the things that have gone wrong in my life since i have changed:

I started lying to the people i loved

I lost my virginity to Edward in the janitors closet

Started drinking and smoking

Taking drugs

Have sex with random guys

The list goes on i hate number 2 i didn't plan on loosing that with an actual boyfriend after we have dated for a while. What am i doing just sitting here crying over things that have gone wrong in my life, I'm the one who made them that way so that means i have to change them back not that i planned to, but i will try does not mean that i can't still be the same just not do these things often.

As i turned to leave the last person i wanted to see stood there shocked Edward Cullen, can't he give me a break.

"What the fuck do you want Edward", i said harshly.

"Bella please you have to listen to me when i say i did not keep the tape", he said he sounded that he was telling the truth but i can't believe him, his the only one how had the tape.

"Why should i believe you i never have why should i trust you know", i shot t him.

"Like i said before i like you ok, for some reason there are just these feelings that i feel for you and if i could i would not feel this way but i do", he explained. God what is he doing what am i suppose to believe him when his always lied to me and on top of that he was with some bimbo before sucking each other's faces.

"Even if i do have the same feelings for you, what we go out for what a week because you got tired of me, then you move on to a bimbo like this afternoon", I asked him.

"No, what fucking gives you the right to judge how i feel and do, fuck it's not like you would not do that, no you would just get over them after a day", he yelled.

"NEWS FASH FOR WHAT MAKE'S YOU THINK I WILL GET OVER YOU IN A DAY, GOD I HAAVE NEVER GOTTEN OVER YOU SINCE YOU FIRST KISSED ME AT LAURENS PARTY IN 9TH GRADE SHOCKER FOR YOU ISEN'T IT HERE'S MORE FOR YOU I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO YOU IN THE FUCKING JANITORS CLOSET", I got out, oh shit what did i just say fuck looks like i will be leaving. I went over to my car Edward was still standing there shocked. I turned to get in my car when a pair of hands pulled me out.

"What the fuck", i turned and found Edward gripping my waist. I pushed him away he looked up at me.

"I took your virginity", he whispered.

"That's what i said didn't i well if since you got your answer i will be leaving", i replied. I got into my car without him pulling me out. I drove off to the empty house i will be staying in for a month with my big brother who is pissed off at me. Well there is still Shane who has no idea what is going on so at least i have someone to bug for a couple of days.