Dear Renette,
I am Stratford upon Avon, one of england's towns, and I thought it might be nice to talk to a female for once (Birmingham is female, but she's alway's really busy and loud and last time I visited her I got overwhelmed and nearly fainted)
So nice to meet you! You can call me Lizzy or Lizzie, or if you want to become a member of the 'Other sex name club' then call me trevor.
How cold are you at the moment? The heating keeps going off in my house so I'm pretty cold. (My big sister solihull keeps coming and stealing stuff from me too)
If you need any help getting a date then I can sort that out (not in that way) the Cotswolds have some really nice guys in. Borton on the Water can be a jerk, but the rest are as lively and lovely as they get.
I've got to go now, London is coming past in her stupid high heels and froufrou skirt, so I need to go push her over and jump on her.
With much violence,
Lizzy
(P.S. If you don't understand why I would want to kill London, listen up. She steals all the limelight when I was the one who had Shakespeare first. The globe theatre may well be in london, dammit, but shakespeare is MINE!)
Dear Stratford,
Nice to meet you as well. Your friend Birmingham sounds a lot like America.
I see your point, because I also rarely receive female company. I think I'll just call you Stratford, I have a hard time getting on first name bases with people.
It's not that cold...Right now it's about -20 degrees fahrenheit, that's not that cold is it?
Thank you for the offer, but I am fine on my own right now.
Oh...Alright then, good luck with that.
Sincerely
Greenland
(P.S. While I don't know who Shakespeare is, I do know about London. I used to pillage the English tribes all the time. Those were good times)