A/N: My Dear Readers. This chapter shows us Daryl's point of view of what he experienced with newly found Rick's group. I remind you that he is still with Karen, so whatever his actions will be now, he will consider her in them. But don't worry. We will get our Daryl/Carol ending. If it will be happy or sad..I don't know yet. Only thing I know is that they are destined to be together, in this world or the next.

Caryl on.

Challia.

Disclaimer:I do not own The Walking Dead.

The walk back to your cabin is as well the longest and the shortest walk in your life as you can remember. When you turn your back and eyes from Rick and Carol, determined to go back to your current life right here and right now, as soon as possible...you also have a feeling that time runs so slowly, the air is thick and dense, all sounds are louder now and your feet move slowly within own volition. Is this what shock feels like? You always thought it would be more intense, but at the same time less ..pure, less controllable. All this time when you watched Carol and listened to Rick, you sort of felt like everything was going in slow motion, although you still held all the control over things. You willingly gave them the newly hunted deer. You willingly started to walk - run even - towards Carol, and you willingly and immediately stopped as soon as Rick's voice invaded your space. Was it because you still subconsciously regarded him as a leader, somewhere deep in your mind and heart? Or was it because he was with her? And so close to her, so early in the morning? Well, no matter why and how this all happened, it was a fact. Rick and his group were here now. Hershel and his daughters. Carl and his lil' sister. Glenn. Axel? You turn around your head when you're in safe distance, sure no one can see you now, sheltered by the shadows of trees around. You watch your initial group, gathering now for breakfast on the front lawn of what is supposed to be Rick and Carol's bungalow. A pretty blonde comes to the table placed now firmly on the grass and then gives Carol a big hug and then turns around as if calling someone. Then a little, maybe a year or two old girl runs forward. She has dark hair and big blue eyes. She wears a yellow dress.

You try to swallow a lump in your throat, but your tongue is dry and sore. You know who these 2 girls are. Beth grew up to become a wonderful young woman now. And Asskicker...as gorgeous as ever, now running, sassing, laughing and fussing about everything. Like all kids should. No matter the apocalypse, or the safe base you are all now in...children still remain the same. Sometimes you envy them. All this careless joy and fun and happiness. But on the other hand, Carl never had any. You can see him now in the distance. Sherriff's hat still on his head. He is taller and his shoulders are broader, but he still is a kid. Sixteen now. You wonder briefly how many good moments this young guy had a chance to see in the prison, or outside it.

And Sophia..Sophia never even had a chance to experience any of them.

But no, you don't wanna go there again.

Your grip on the crossbow tightens so much, you might break it. And you know it. But you can't stop watching the group in front of your eyes, even though it's from the distance.

You can see Hershel limpin' but still on his two legs. You guess they found him a prosthetic one. He's grown a nice white beard now and even though he is smiling and sharing the food bowl with a nice young brunette, you can't stop to wonder. How this old but strong farmer became a shadow of a man, a fighting and struggling one, but still a shadow. The brunette's hair is longer than you recall. Her green eyes are smiling as you remembered them. She is holding a hand of an Asian who became so dear friend of yours once. Who your brother once almost beat to death. And you still left him. And her. And all of them.

You turn around preparing to run, to disappear, to get rid of all the emotions that grabbed you all of a sudden while watching this group of people. A group that once was strong, because you were a part of it. Then weak, when you left. And now strengthened again. By trust, believe, and love through its members. You understand love now, Karen has taught you this. But why the love you find in her is so much different than what you see among those people? Between Rick and Carol, and Carl, and Judith, and Glenn, Hershel, Maggie, Beth...and all the strangers you see around but know that they are in now, in order to keep everyone safe..and loved too.

Suddenly you want to bury in her once more, to forger what you just saw, to go back to what you had for the last 2 years. You can see your cabin now, and Karen is sitting on the front porch, like she usually does.

"Hey sweet cheeks!" you yell to her, because you know she will react, like she always does.

"Hey dirty huntsman!" You welcome her broad smile with relief but also anxiety. You will have to tell her about seeing Rick again. And his group. And Carol. Truth is, you never told Karen about Carol and her daughter whose death turned your whole live upside down. Karen suspected though that there was someone else in your life, someone extremely important. But she didn't ask questions, she didn't want to know, and you were grateful for that. But now you want to tell her, and if not now, you know you will have to tell her some day.

Her arms are strong and she smells of grass. Her smile is welcoming but you can sense a worry there.

"Hey..the hunt went ok?"

"Yea. Not much to hunt on these days, the woods are all emptied. But, I got a nice buck".

"Oh. Where is it?".

Her question sort of catches you off guard. Of course you could tell her. There's no point in lying. The camp is huge but their "district" is small, chances are solid for her to stump into other camps soon. And then she will know. It was only a deer. But all that surrounded the brief encounter with Rick and Carol, all the unspoken emotion and feels...Karen should never find this out.

"I gave it to the guard. Hopefully, they will use it".

You have a feeling she is sensing your worries and doubts.

"Hey..all okay? You seem kinda ..off".

"M fine. Had a long morning, need a shower".

"Want me to join?"

Karen's question is justified. You usually showered together and it was followed by heated moments and intimacy and love. But not this time. This time you could not. Because all the times you close your eyes you see another woman, a woman with white and tender skin, with freckles all over her neck, with sad blue eyes and sweet voice, someone who you left in a wrong moment, and who now belongs to someone else.

"Eh..no, I'll be quick here. Got to talk to you after".

"Ok..kay".

Glenn and Maggie's wedding. You still have to decide whether to come or not. Such a small matter, shouldn't mean anything now that the world has ended. But somehow you know that this is your matter also, your responsibility. They were your people, your friends. And you left them, which was worst choice you ever made, now you are sure of that. Of course the wedding itself is nothing. The whole idea of marriage seems stupid to you now at the world that it is. But somewhere deep in your mind, or heart maybe, starts to form this feeling of acceptance, appreciation, and approval for what they are about to do. Because even now, in times of war, even now, when the world has gone to shit, even now, which is ridiculous and you by all means don't approve it..even now, there is still a meaning behind it. And that is why you have to come. To find and see this meaning.

"Daryl?" She is worried, you know that. Her voice speaks volumes. She is so afraid to loose you, so afraid.

"Heey Dimples..". You try to sound funny, teasing, like always with her..Dimples was a nickname you came out with about the first week you have met, is suited her pretty face and large eyes. How came you could have never found a nickname for Carol..? Freckles would be okay..but would she even liked it? No idea. You never had a chance to see.

"Where are you? " I am here with you, you wanted to reply. I have always been with you. But that ain't true and you are not a liar.

"Wha..?"

"You're away..ever since you came back from your hunt...what happened there?"

There is no point in lying or avoiding the answer.

"I found others. My formal group. From Atlanta, you now". You can't look into her eyes now, and you're not sure why. You are not lying to her, you are not being un faithful. It's the truth you're about to bring up, that may hurt her. And you're so afraid.

"Are they alright? Sherriff Rick and all the others you spoke about?".

"They are all alive, how weird this is."

"You spoke to him?"

You can only just nod.

"What did he say?"

"A pair of...of our friends are about to get married here. How stupid is this. But they want us to come."

"Us. You and me?"

"Yes. I told them, you and I are...well, you're with me now."

"Do you want to go?"

"I dunno really. I mean, I wanna see if Glenn and Maggie are okay and all, but wedding...and all the others...I dunno".

"Why are you afraid?"

"Huh?"

"Why are you so afraid? Who else is gonna be there?"

"Why u think I am afraid of anything?".

"Because otherwise you'd be all anxious and kickin'. Like you always are when a new interesting event or place is around. I know you Daryl, you can't fool me.".

"What..what you mean now?"

"This woman you always think of when we make love.

You always whisper her name when we're together. Carol, right?

Is she gonna be there too? Please tell me Daryl. I think I deserve to know."

The air from your lungs seems to be gone now. How did Karen find out? Are you that obvious? Were you always that obvious? And certain..? At one point you feel like a piece of shit for hurting your woman like that. On the other hand, you feel relief. Maybe it is time to take a different turn. Maybe it's time to stop lying to yourself. It's always been her, Carol. It has always been her.

Karen just looks at you, not hurt, not wounded..just curious..and then turns away.

"I'm going to bed. If you don't wanna come, I understand.".

You know that this night, you will spend alone.