The Chronicles of Angel Book 6

by nurjen08

It's been going three months since the death of Angel, the first male slayer. Our ragtag team is still out there hunting what haunts our nightmares. They've been keeping Sunnydale safe, Sunnydale going. But what happens when the very thing you fought to keep out finds it's way in? The continuation of the TCOAB series.

7. Reality

Chapter 7 Reality

A/N: I am so sorry about this chapter being late. But it is here now. This is a long chapter like on Microsoft Office it's 30 pages, 14,000 some words long so limber up. I packed a lot in this chapter and honestly there was no real way to break it up into two. This chapter also not only sets the rest of the story in motion but it starts to set the rest of the series. So what's to come? You'll see, just when you think you know what's going to happen you'll get side swiped. Anyways, happy reading.

Jimmy's in the back with a pocket of high
If you listen close
You can hear him cry

Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Sing it
Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below
Way down below, way down below

Judy's in the front seat picking up trash
Living on the dough
Gotta make that cash
Won't be pretty
Won't be sweet
She's just sittin' here on her feet

Sing it
Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Go
Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Sing
Oh, lord, tell us so
We belong way down below

Oh, Lord, tell us so
We belong way down below
Way down below, way down below
Way down below, way down below

I've had better days, man
I've seen better days
I've had better ways, man
I know better ways

One, two, three and four
The devil's knocking at your door
Caught in the eye of a dead man's lie
Show you life with your head held high
Now you're on your knees
With your head hung low
Big man tells you where to go
Tell 'em it's good
Tell 'em okay
Don't do a goddamn thing they say

Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Oh, lord, tell us so
We belong way down below
Way down below, way down below
Way down below, way down below

I've seen better ways, man
I know better ways
I've seen better days, man
I've had better days

Jenna's in the back with a pocket of high
If you listen close
You can hear the crying

Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Oh, lord, tell us so
We belong way down below

Oh, lord, heaven knows
We belong way down below

Oh, lord, tell us so
We belong way down below

Way down below, way down below
Way down below, way down below

Heaven Knows by The Pretty Reckless

It only takes a second but the alarm never fails to wake you up and it always seems to wake you up at the best time when you're asleep. But Angel wasn't asleep he was awake. He did fall asleep for a little bit after he and Buffy made love last night. For her it was a hundred and forty days for him it was a hundred and one years. He thought he would sleep through the rest of the night with all that's happened but he got an hour maybe.

He couldn't go back to sleep so he laid there in bed with Buffy. She did sleep because she had a warm body next to her. She fell asleep to his heartbeat, she missed that so much. It always put her to sleep it was like her lullaby. It felt like she's been without it for so long. But Angel didn't sleep the last few hours. And now the alarm was going off saying it was six in the morning. Although what happened last night no way would the town be open today as the vampires and Hellions did do some damage.

Dawn won't even go to school today. But the alarm will wake you up no matter what. Buffy heard it go off and groaned a little. Angel reached out and shut it off. Buffy had to take a minute to realize last night wasn't a dream because Angel was right next to her. He was still here. She sat up and while they've been a part for a few months she still knows him the best.

"You ok?" She asked knowing he didn't sleep. Angel didn't say anything but took her hand into his. There was a lot to talk about between them and of course between the team. The only thing Buffy could do was be there for him, this was going to be a slow process and the last thing he needs is to get tossed into the war just within hours of returning to earth.

"I'm ok." He answered and at the moment he was. Buffy nodded knowing she shouldn't press the matter right now so she kissed his hand and got closer to him resting her head on his chest. She had to be careful or she'll fall asleep again to his beating heart. He held her for a moment and it was peaceful. "What's happening today?"

"I don't know," She answered truthfully. "That was a bad attack last night should have known it was going to happen. We had a build up of vampires over the last few weeks." Angel just listened wondering what their lives were like while he was gone. So far they've kept up the fight at home. "Dawn won't go to school today." Maybe everyone can be together today like a family and talk. Buffy then kissed his chest and held him again.

"What did you do all this time?" Angel asked wondering. They didn't talk last night well they did just in a different way. Buffy laid in his arms thinking what she really did all summer. It was a brutal summer too.

"I stayed busy," She started thinking about all the moments she would just cry alone. "I cried, I thought, sometimes I thought it was just a bad dream something I would wake up from." Angel listened and he could see it in his head a broken Buffy, he's seen it before. "I did my job to keep me busy but when I was alone you weren't there. I knew and understood why but it didn't make it better."

Angel left her, not on purpose but he did leave. He saved the world and died but he was still gone leaving Buffy just something she can do but something she can't. "The start of June was the hardest I didn't think I was going to live." She knew she would have to tell him about Elizabeth and Dawn being possessed. Would he be mad about that? She'll tell him later, one step at a time. "I talked to you lot." Angel then looked down and she looked up to him. "I would sit in front of your headstone and just…talk. I don't know why but I did, it made me feel safe." He could see the tears wanting to surface.

"I didn't, I," Angel didn't know what to say.

"I know," Buffy stopped him as she propped herself up. "I know you didn't have a choice and it's not your fault." She then placed her hand on his cheek for reassurance. "I still kept my promise, I kept fighting no matter how hard it got." And it was true but now that he was back he couldn't leave at least not so soon. Buffy leaned in for a soft kiss but before she could pull away Angel kept her close. He didn't want to leave the bed or room. He wasn't sure if he could handle the outside right now. He felt safest here with Buffy, out there was too loud, too bright, too dark, too horrible. This room still felt like a small part of heaven and he didn't want to leave.

So he just kept her close kissing her. Buffy didn't pull away she didn't want to. She'll stay a little while longer, she can and she wanted to. Once she walks out that door she'll have to face reality and sometimes reality sucks.

---

Finally Buffy got up and closed the door behind her. She was dressed in some PJs and part of her just wanted to go back in the room and close the world off. The hallway was still dark probably meaning the people were still asleep. She then went to Dawn's door and opened it and looked in. Dawn was asleep, completely out and Buffy wasn't going to wake her. She probably slept more soundly last night because Angel was just a few feet away. Like Buffy, she felt safe that she could allow herself to actually sleep.

Buffy continued down the hall seeing Giles' door was open and his bed was made so he was awake. Cordelia and Doyle's door was closed and they were probably asleep. Willow and Oz's door was open but they were kicked out for the night. Buffy headed downstairs and walked into the kitchen seeing Giles going about his morning tasks.

"Morning," He greeted Buffy she nodded. "How is he?"

"I don't think he slept much but I think he's ok." Buffy answered and stood there as Giles brought her a mug with her blood in it and then he continued to walk and Buffy followed him to the outside where they can enjoy a rather nice morning considering what happened last night. They sat on the chairs as the autumn breeze was soft and cool with Buffy's wind chimes making their music. "What about Willow?" Buffy asked sipping her blood while Giles sipped his tea.

"I'm not sure what she did," Giles paused for a moment. He was grateful for Angel being back. The missing piece, the hole, the emptiness was gone at the moment. "The effects won't be felt right away. I'm happy he's here and safe but,"

"It was wrong." Buffy finished and Giles nodded. "Willow said she saved him?" Buffy asked making sure she heard correctly. "She thought he was trapped?"

"Well he did jump into a portal it was possible his soul got trapped wherever the portal went in this case it was Hell." Giles understood a little bit of Willow's actions. Buffy knew from last night Angel wasn't in Hell.

"What are the consequences of this?" The vampire needed to know. Giles sighed because there were dozens.

"How about we enjoy the day or at least that we made it through the night and if something comes along we'll deal with it." The Watcher suggested and Buffy nodded. One step at a time.

"Morning," It was Doyle coming out to join them followed by Cordelia with cups of coffee in their hands and they sat down on a little outside sofa. Buffy then looked to them.

"Did you know Willow was going to raise Angel?" Buffy asked.

"That's a way to start a fine morning," Doyle deadpanned but nodded. "It was all talk though. We had wishful thinking."

"Yeah like wouldn't it be great if we could bring Angel back." Cordelia stated. "But it was just talk we had no idea Willow actually went out and researched and looked. Then the night before last she said she had everything and we were going to do it." That was it in a nutshell.

"Did you miss the party?" Buffy asked wondering why they weren't with Willow.

"Backed out." Doyle answered. "I told her it was wrong that it went against everything we do and what Angel did. I think Xander backed out but Willow guilt tripped him. Anya just follows Xander and Oz well. Oz just wanted to make nothing happened to Willow but I don't think he wanted her to do it." So from what both Buffy and Giles heard is the team was against this and Willow went ahead anyways. Even if they all backed out she was still going to do it.

Buffy knew she was a bit harsh last night. Last night was stressful but she didn't regret what was said. Xander should have backed out. "We were going to tell you yesterday but then well…shit happened."

"Thank you," Buffy meant it.

"How is he?" Cordelia asked and Buffy shrugged.

"He didn't sleep much. He seems ok I think." Buffy wasn't sure not enough time has passed yet. "Maybe once he gets back in the swing of things then maybe I don't know." It was going to be a very long day. Just then the slayer was here and every just felt like smiling as he came out. They all got up and to greet and hug him. Once that was over Angel and Buffy sat on the swinging sofa and just went at a gentle swing.

"Wish we could celebrate but the town is well…yeah." Doyle then sipped his coffee.

"It's ok." Angel assured him. "Honestly I kind of want to go on patrol."

"You don't have to right away Angel." Giles assured him. "I mean we can handle it let you have some time off, rest." Angel felt the need to get back to work it'll keep him sane.

"I know but I am the slayer." He added and just then the last person of the house was awake.

"It's alive." Doyle announced as Dawn sat on the other side of Angel and rested her head on his shoulder.

"No school right?" She asked to be sure.

"No," Buffy answered and Dawn felt relieved. "Need to go into town see what damage has been done."

"You think they destroyed the magic shop?" Cordelia asked as Angel, Buffy and Dawn continued to rock a little on the swinging sofa.

"Watch it be the last thing standing." Doyle smirked and Giles nodded sipping his tea. This was peaceful though. Just them together the six of them. This was nice and it felt like the last four months didn't happen as Angel was here. He was really here again and alive. "Well, I say who's up for some pancakes?" Doyle was really saying since they had the morning off Buffy should make breakfast.

"Or we could all just go back to sleep." Dawn added and that was true the sun had just started to rise and they could go back to sleep. Going back to sleep did sound nice.

"Then pancakes." Doyle added in as they all stood up to go back to sleep or at least just lounge about and be lazy before things get crazy.

"Yes Doyle I'll make breakfast." Buffy confirmed and Angel smiled a little. Maybe today won't be so bad after all.

---

The day started early for the people of Sunnydale as they needed to put the town back together. Life goes on in this town as usual. The shopkeepers were hard at work. Cops patrolled the streets to help and assist. But while the vampires either left completely or retreated to the sewers and the Hellions ran as fast as they could one thing stayed.

This thing wasn't a part of the wrecking of Sunnydale. It came from somewhere else, deep from the earth. The thing stayed within the shadows and felt like a homing beacon calling to it and it neared the ruins of the high school. It didn't come from the Hell Mouth but it was from Hell. There was no way to get back but did it really want to go back?

---

Angel was in the bathroom finishing up. While he had a bath last night something about a shower makes you feel refreshed and alive. He had to use Buffy's girly shampoos and soaps but she did keep his cologne. He was shaving right now and again he didn't have his razor or shaving cream and was using Buffy's things. Pink razors and frilly smelling shaving cream. This knocks his slayer status down a bit. He thought about keeping the stubble but for some reason it made him look very tired and worn.

Once he was done he hoped the cologne will mask the…apple and pears scent. He wiped his face clean and Angel then looked in the mirror seeing himself. Angel saw the necklace, he could see parts of the Igone tattoo and the Triquetra Knot that matched Buffy's. He slightly turned and saw the small outline of his Griffin tattoo. And then the Vampire Slayer words written in Greek were still on the inside of his wrist. He was made whole not missing anything. He grabbed his black shirt and started to button it up and let the last few stay unbutton.

Angel then went back looking into the mirror seeing himself in the face. He always seemed to look older than he really was. He's only twenty but he doesn't feel like it even now more so than ever. People his age were in college, living life, partying, figuring out who they are. But he already knew his purpose well he did at one time but now not so much.

Angel turned the light off and walked into the bedroom seeing Buffy was dressed and she looked up. He was still here and looked like Angel. She can smell the cologne and she missed it. That scent brought back a flood of memories and she never thought she would smell that again. She tracked him as he reached for his jacket and something compelled her to hug him. So when Angel turned around he was met with Buffy wrapping her arms around him.

Everything that made him, him, unique all came back. The cologne, the smell of the leather, the unique scent that was just him, the warmth, it was all here and she missed it, she missed it bad. But it was all here again. Angel was caught off guard for a moment but then held her. Angel might never know how much Buffy actually missed him or even understand. She pulled away looking up at him.

"Sorry," It was more breath than voice and Angel already saw the tears forming again. "Sorry, I just," She was trying to not let anything surface but she missed all of that. He then pulled her into another hug and she accepted it and rested her head on his shoulder comfortably. Buffy had a small smile on her face as it was really coming together, Angel was home again.

Breakfast was done and now it was time to look at the town and damage can actually be seen. Everyone at the mansion left and headed out to the cars and Angel saw the Mustang. Of course Buffy took him home in it last night but he was out and come to think of it last night was a blur. Now seeing his car again did make him smile. Just then Buffy tossed the keys to him meaning he was driving and Dawn smiled.

Angel was anxious to get behind the wheel and got in. The car hasn't changed as he turned the keys in the ignition and it roared and damn he did miss that sound. Dawn had to sit in the back and was missing the front seat but then again it felt like old times. Angel put the gear stick into first and driving stick is like riding a bike, he could never forget. Giles looked from his car smiling as he followed Angel out from the property and he too missed this.

Angel made the left out on the road and it would be a two-mile stretch of nothing before they got into town. The windows were down and it felt good as Buffy sat next to him. She did have a smile on her face as things felt right with the world. And for Angel sometimes driving made him the most relax and right now he was relaxed, this felt good.

---

Angel pulled up to the magic shop and the widow was smashed out so it meant they had to do inventory to see what was taken or destroyed and magic there were no ingredients that screamed bad mojo could be made. Oz's van was here meaning Willow was here too and she was. Anya was with them but no Xander as they waited outside.

But for the three of them to see the black Mustang with Angel at the wheel pulling up, it gave them chills. He was really here again. They could hear the radio going and the song seemed fitting with Back in Black playing. Angel shut the car off not sure if he was ready to face Willow the person who brought him back. He should thank her right?

"Always liked the guy's choice in music." Oz commented while the rest of the team got out of the cars. Once again for the three waiting by the magic shop doors seeing Angel in his leather jacket, the button up shirt that wasn't completely button, wearing the dark blue jeans and black boots, the slayer was back.

Everyone met up and after last night's conversion this had all the potential to be very awkward. Giles looked to the door of the magic shop and saw it was broken so he walked in. But before Angel walked in something caught his attention well at least he thought something did as he looked behind him. There was nothing there and then he looked into the magic shop and walked in. The place wasn't all that bad, it could be worse as everyone gathered inside.

"So," Willow would be the first to break the ice. "Where do we start?"

"In the center work our way out." Giles looked around. "We need to do an inventory see what is missing." Giles then looked to the group. "Willow, I need you to see if any books, potions, anything of that nature points to something that can be bad." Willow then looked to Buffy and the vampire didn't give any sign of disapproval. "Anya, hit the invoices and cash register." The ex-demon nodded and went to work. "Buffy, Cordy, Dawn, help me clean up anything broken. Angel, Doyle and Oz start rebuilding." Once again everyone has a job to do. "Wait, where's Xander?" Giles asked.

---

Xander was at the high school. Most of the debris was gone and they had to survey any damage to the new lumber and building materials. Not much was ruined a few things were missing and they would have redo the land a little bit. But by the end of the day everything should be back in order to start pouring the foundation for the new Sunnydale High School. Actually that's one thing the group will have to tell Angel.

---

"They really want to rebuild it?" Angel asked as he sat at the table in the magic shop. The floor was swept and all the broken glass and what not was cleaned up. A board was put over the broken window until Giles had it repaired.

"Well, once the portal opened it kind of smashed the school down." Dawn answered. "And you know Sunnydale has brilliant people." That was thing about this town. The people knew there were monsters and they come from the school or some do. They know what happened at the school and yet they will build on it.

"Well, actually the town's people voted against rebuilding the high school there." Giles started as he looked in the books of his supplies.

"Three gallons of chicken feet!" Buffy yelled and Giles looked into the book and nodded.

"Thank you!" And it meant that was good. "It was the City Council who override the vote and wanted to rebuild there." The Watcher finished and that confused Angel.

"Don't worry we can burn it back down." Oz assured the slayer as Angel remembered that night. "Xander says there hasn't been much happening there unless you count the demon snake."

"The Mayor?" Angel asked.

"No the one that had that freaky venom and bit Xander, he almost lost his mind." Cordelia answered as she came in with coffee for everyone. Angel looked confused as he does not remember that. "Oh right you were…" Cordelia stopped herself. "Not here. Yeah some demon had these snakes, one got loose and the venom would make a person crazy and make their heart explode. Then the snake would eat the heart pieces."

"But Buffy, Cordelia, Willow and I killed the demon and all his snakes. It was gross." Dawn added and Willow smiled a little was Buffy came out and went to get her coffee. "Except Xander really did freak out."

"Oh the snake?" Buffy asked and Dawn nodded.

"Sounds like an awesome summer." Angel added seeing that they did succeed at the mission.

"Oh that's not even the half of it." Willow joined in. "Besides taking out the vampires which we've gotten really good at, there was Samhain, we had two really old vampires come back Rick and Nemo. The re-released Elizabeth but Dawn handled it well." Angel's eyes widen and the whole group realized Angel wasn't ready for this yet. "Oh and Dawn was possessed, two other vampires showed up from Buffy's past and,"

"Willow," Oz cut her off and then she looked to Angel seeing his face realizing that he hasn't been completely informed about everything. And once more she has dug herself a hole. Angel looked to Buffy as she stood there. Everyone was uncomfortable now since Willow brought up Elizabeth and that she did return.

"Sounds interesting." Angel looked to Buffy meaning they need to talk about Elizabeth and Dawn. He stood up and she came around the table as they headed to the back of the shop to talk in private. Angel walked into the storage room first while Buffy closed the door behind her. Angel let out a sigh and then turned around and faced her.

"Yes, I was going to tell you ok just," Buffy paused. "Was hoping it would be tonight or just not at this moment." She looked to Angel. "The vampires Rick and Nemo they brought Elizabeth back. Nemo was just nasty but Rick planned all this out. Took out my soul because he wanted to find his sister just wanted to keep the team busy."

"Sister?" Angel asked and Buffy nodded.

"According to Rick he and his sister Victoria were both slayers." Buffy added and now Angel looked confused. "Giles and I are still looking into that but according to Rick he was the first male slayer just history forgot. He lost his sister and came here but unleashed Elizabeth saying something how Dawn needed to face her fear." Angel stood there listening to Buffy. Elizabeth came back and he wasn't here to stop it. "The team followed your command on putting my soul back."

"And Dawn?" Angel asked. Dawn has only heard of Elizabeth she never faced her.

"Dawn beat the crap out of her." Buffy answered with a small smile. Angel had to smile a little. "I'll let her tell you that story but she might embellish a little. Gave her the katana for it."

"What about her being possessed?" Angel needed to know what that was about.

"A demon came out of Hell when Glory opened the portal and he managed to stay when you closed it. He's the…Halloween god I guess," Buffy didn't know how to explain it.

"Samhain?" Angel asked Buffy was always impressed at Angel's wide range of knowledge.

"Yeah, he was going to re-open the Hell Mouth and to do it he had to summon very powerful demons from Hell." Angel could tell Buffy was uncomfortable but why. "One of the demons…that demon never went back and took over Dawn for a few hours a few weeks after Samhain." She made seem like it wasn't a big deal but Angel could tell it was. "The demon was…Cruciate it's name is Cruciate."

Angel could see that name made Buffy nervous and upset. "The name means torture and…" She hasn't told anyone this until Cruciate showed up. "He was the demon that tortured me in Hell. He was summoned here because he is very powerful and then to torture me on earth he took Dawn." Buffy couldn't look at Angel because Dawn was possessed and it shouldn't have happened. "Cruciate is still out there, he's not Hell yet. But he promised to take me back." Buffy didn't look at Angel the whole time.

As before Hell is something Buffy doesn't talk about to anyone. It's not that she can't or even won't but the torture and punishment never changed for the hundred years she was there. Just then she felt Angel's hand under her chin as he gently pulled it in his direction. He could tell she was ashamed and embarrassed for Elizabeth's return and allowing a demon especially one she knows to be around anyone here.

"It's ok Buffy." Angel assured because obviously everyone was ok. Buffy leaned in resting her head on his shoulder. She wished Angel was there when it all happened especially when she met Cruciate face to face for the first time in three years. That night after it all happened she broke in silence away from everyone. She had no one to cry to at the time. Buffy felt Angel's arm wrap around Buffy's shoulder as she finally felt had the shoulder she needed to cry on or just rest against. She needed this about two months ago. But she had it now.

Angel stepped outside from the magic shop and what happened last night seemed to go away. There was some awkwardness like Buffy and Willow might exchange looks but not words. For Buffy she learned it was Willow who pushed for Angel's return even when she was told not to. Angel pulled out a pack of cigarettes and took one out and lit it. He knows he shouldn't smoke. He's known this since he's started but for some reason he felt a lot of anxiety at the moment.

The magic shop was getting cleaned up and should be open up for business tomorrow. He was waiting on Buffy so they could look around the town and see what damage was done. Angel took a drag on the cigarette and blew out the smoke and it felt good he felt his nerves calm down. Angel went to take another drag and then looked across the way and saw something sitting there. It was black, black as night. It seemed to have a human form but behind it, it appeared to have wings but the wings looked broken and torn. Maybe that's the way they are. Angel couldn't see eyes but he knew this thing was staring at him.

"Angel?" Angel jumped a little as Buffy came from the shop. Angel looked to her and then back across the street and there was nothing there. Buffy then looked at the direction he was looking. "Everything ok?"

"Yeah," Angel continued to stare at whatever he was looking even though it was gone. Angel tossed the cigarette to the ground and he and Buffy headed to the Mustang and got in. They were just going to drive around for a little while and survey the town.

---

Buffy didn't really pay attention but it wasn't until Angel stopped the car did she realize where they were and looked over seeing the land where the high school was. The last time Angel was here the school still stood well parts of it. It was gone now ready to be built.

"Angel?" Buffy asked but he just got out of the car and headed to the fence. It was fenced off unless you were actually working here. Even the tower that hung over the Hell Mouth was gone. Angel walked right up to the gate and even grabbed it looking in. Buffy got out of the car and stood behind him. "Angel?" Buffy asked again but she got no response as Angel started to walk following the fence and walked in through an opening. Buffy quickly followed knowing they weren't supposed to be here but Angel didn't care. The east side of the school is where everything was getting done they were on the west side.

Angel continued to walk hearing the construction going on in the background. He continued to walk and then stopped and Buffy knew where they were. Well this was as close as they were going to get with all the construction going on. Angel then looked up where the makeshift tower was.

'Dawn's eyes were already watering as he looked to her.

"Angel no," Dawn protested but Angel made sure they were eye to eye now.

"Angel no," Dawn protested but Angel made sure they were eye to eye now as he hunched over looking to his little sister. He understands why he's felt the way he has, how death is his gift. Death gives life. In death others will live including Dawn.

"Dawn, it's ok," Angel assured and Dawn shook her head crying. "You're going to be fine," Angel's voice was in a whisper. "You're going to beat this world I know it." Dawn nodded with tears because this is what Angel did, he always sacrificed himself for those he loved and Dawn was one. "You do what is right ok Dawn, do what is right and don't ever give up ok." Dawn nodded as the tears ran down her cheeks. "You remember everything I've taught you, you remember to stay alive in here," Angel pointed to Dawn's head and then to her heart. "And in here, you heard?"

"I heard." Dawn sobbed. "I promise I will." She cried.

"Remember that I love you ok, I love you," Angel pulled her close and Dawn sobbed in his embrace but she didn't want to let go. She felt safe in her brother's arms and she didn't want that safety to let go.

"Love you too." Dawn could barely get it out. Buffy stood there realizing this is how it was going to end, self sacrifice, that's why she can't save him. Buffy already had tears seeing big brother and little sister holding each other.' Angel came back to reality again for a moment.

Buffy continued to stand there waiting to see what he was going to do. Angel continued to stare where the platform was. It wasn't a high place when it was built so in all reality the jump would not have killed him. It would have hurt and left some damage. It was the energy, the portal's energy that killed him. Then Angel looked to Buffy as she stood there.

'"It's blood Buffy, my blood. I know what it means that death is my gift." Buffy stood there in disbelief and shook her head no with tears fighting not to break down as Angel got closer to her. Dawn stilled cried as these two lovers were about to say their finally good bye.

"No, Angel there has to be another way," Buffy begged and she felt him cup her cheeks and they rested their foreheads against each other's.

"You know what I have to do," His voice was soft and calm. "Buffy listen to me, listen because there's not a lot of time," There was never time and she's been told this so many times. Buffy was already crying and was in shambles. "I love you, I do. Promise me no matter what happens you will never stop fighting. You've fought the monster inside and I want you to keep fighting. It's easy to give up but don't. Please Buffy don't give up," He begged and Buffy nodded. "Don't give up, we never give up, we fight until the end."'

She was doing just that even to this day. She has yet to give in and hasn't given up knowing it's been hard. She's kept her promise. He then could remember that passionate kiss they shared and for a moment during that kiss he almost didn't want to jump. But he did because it's what needed to be done. 'Buffy looked to the clock tower and it was one minute to seven thirty.

"Oh god," She sobbed and fell apart. "There's not enough time, it's not enough time." She sobbed uncontrollably as this was happening, this was really happening. She knew it was going to but god, she wished it never would. Seeing Buffy break down, shattering like this in his arms Angel couldn't bare it. He didn't want leave her but this is what he had to do. Angel tried not to cry but couldn't hold it back.

"Shh, Buffy, please," He begged her as she sobbed even harder. They pulled each other in for another tight hug because they would never hug again. Buffy let out a cry and it was in sadness and pain, she felt like she was dying. Angel cried too, holding on for a moment longer. Dawn broke down because she will never see them together again.

"I won't forget," Buffy managed to get in between the sobs. "I promise I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget, I'll never forget," She repeated over and over and he squeezed her tighter. They pulled away sharing one last tender kiss. Angel looked at her cupping her cheeks and the tears were gone, he looked at peace. There it was, that look, that look knowing he was going to die and he wanted it. This was the sixth time she's seen it and she never wanted to see it from him.

"I love you," He whispered and she nodded.

"I love you," She repeated back meaning every word. He kissed her forehead and she closed her eyes hoping time would stop. Maybe this was a dream and she'll wake up.

"Good night love." Angel then pulled away and she opened her eyes seeing him run to the portal and he jumped in. It hurt for a moment, just one moment and it stopped. The pain stopped for Angel, the peace settled in. It felt right, this was what he had to do and it felt right. The fight was over for him and he's won.'

It was over then, it felt like everything ended perfectly and now he was back. Angel looked to where he fell although by the time he hit the ground he was dead. His lifeless body fell just a few feet from the entrance to the Hell Mouth. He died keeping it from opening and for all intensives purposes he succeeded.

"Angel?" Buffy asked.

"Why am I here?" Angel asked with his back to her and Buffy stood there confused at the question. "I was brought back, why?" He then faced her. "Why?" He asked again.

"Willow," Buffy paused for a moment. "Willow thought you were trapped somewhere like in Hell."

"Did you want me to come back?" Angel asked and that was a hard question to answer.

"No, yes," That was the answer. "I did everything you asked but it was so hard. It was so hard and up until last night it wasn't getting any easier." Buffy had tears. "But seeing you again it's like…it's like a dream for me and I don't know if I'm awake or not." Buffy looked around remembering when she saw his lifeless body and how she sat next to him hoping he would wake up. "I missed you but I never wanted you to come back to this awful world." Angel then faced back to where he jumped to his death just taking another moment to remember what it was like to finally be free.

---

The town will be up and running for the most part tomorrow. It's been a long day for everyone with Angel being back. They didn't go on patrol because of all the excitement with Angel back. Everyone seemed happy and Angel sat there feeling very lost but on the outside he seemed ok for them. Right now Angel was laying in bed wide-awake. Buffy was next to him asleep holding his arm like a small child held their stuffed animal when sleeping. Her head was resting on his arm and she was sleeping peacefully.

Angel continued to lay there and looked over seeing the clock reading two in the morning. He should try and close his eyes but every time he did he thought he was going to wake up in his own coffin. So he didn't close his eyes and carefully wiggled out of Buffy's arms. She didn't stir as he took a second to watch her. This was the second night that she was getting the most sleep since last year.

Angel got out of bed and walked to the balcony and opened the door. He stepped outside into the cool air and took a deep breath. It felt like he couldn't breathe at the moment. He walked to the ledge and leaned against looking out. It was quiet out here and it felt good to be alone. Angel buried his face in his hands letting out a sigh. He knows everyone was happy he was back but could he tell them that he wasn't?

Angel pulled his hands away and then his eyes widen. Something was standing down on the ground. It was the same black wing thing he saw earlier today. Angel stood up and continued to look at it. Was he going crazy? Maybe he was but to be sure Angel went back inside silently closing the doors to not wake Buffy. He then went to leave the room and then looked to the sleeping vampire in bed. He should wake her, tell her what he just saw. She can help, he trusts her the most but instead Angel opened the door and silently left.

He walked very quietly down the hall with it's little nightlight giving it's little light to guide him. But then the little light flickered and Angel stopped dead in his tracks. The flickering stopped and that prompt him to pick up his pace. Angel headed downstairs and went to the training room and saw the two crossbows mounted next to each other. The new one Buffy had made for him was slightly bigger and he decided to take it out for a spin. He reached for it and loaded it and made sure he had extra arrows and left.

Angel went out the garden and then started to look. He would walk around for a little bit and then go back inside. Maybe it's because he had no sleep he was seeing things. Angel was quiet as he walked checking and he won't deny it he like the feel of this new crossbow. Just then Angel heard something and spun around.

"Jesus," Angel muttered seeing Spike there.

"Just call me Spike." Angel lowered the crossbow. "What are you doing out here in the middle of the night slayer?"

"Should ask the same." Angel added and Spike nodded.

"I patrol the grounds at night." Spike answered and it was true. While everyone sleeps he watches the mansion. It's a target but not an open one.

"Are we paying you to do that?" Angel asked and Spike smiled.

"No," Again it was true. "I keep a watch out here. When you…went on vacation everyone was not up to speed. Kept my eye on things although Buffy had this place super locked down." Spike went on. "Spells, charm bags, holy water," Buffy took every measure to keep this place and it's people safe. "She sleeps with holy water under the bed and a knife under her pillow."

Angel knows that he felt it last night when he was just laying there. "The Bit," Meaning Dawn, "She does the same. But yeah this place is pretty evil proof. So why are you out here?"

"Thought I saw something." Angel looked around as he could hear the crickets, the whispering bushes and the other various noises the night makes. "If this place is so evil proof…how did Dawn get possessed?"

"Cruciate is a powerful demon. It probably took a while but he finally broke in." Spike answered. "He was a douchbag too hated the demon. So what did you think you saw?" Spike asked as they continued to stand out on the property.

"I don't know." And the slayer didn't know. He didn't tell Spike he saw one of the lights in the mansion flickering.

"I know what you need mate." Spike then motioned to follow him.

Out in the backside of the mansion Angel sat and waited. He still had his crossbow and continued to look around for the shadow. Just then he heard Spike and looked up seeing the vampire had two beer bottles in his hand. Spike sat down next to Angel handed him a beer. Angel opened it and took a sip while Spike pulled out a pack of cigarettes and hand one to Angel and even lit it for him. It was just two guys sharing a smoke and a beer.

"You know slayer," Spike started as blew some smoke out. "I won't pretend to know what you're going though. But I do know a thing about rising from the dead and breaking free from your own coffin." Angel looked to Spike as he had his elbows on his knees holding the beer bottle with both hands and the cigarette between two fingers. "You're honey does too. As vampires it was pretty easy to get over it." Spike was saying he needed to talk to someone about it. He needed to tell someone where he was and how he's feeling.

"Surprise you stuck around." Angel then took a drag and Spike shrugged.

"No place to go I guess. When you kill your own kind you start to make enemies." That was Spike's reasons but those weren't the real reasons. The real reasons were actually upstairs sleeping. "Well, I'm no shrink either but something tells me you aren't exactly happy to be here."

"Just need to get use to being back." Angel assured Spike or maybe he was assuring himself. "Can't look upset or bothered or they worry."

"But if you act too happy they worry." Spike added and that was true. "I know they're all hovering making sure you don't start turning weird or wanting brains." Angel had to smile a little. "You want me to take them out? Give me a hell of a headache, but I couldn't probably thin the herd a little."

"Thanks for the offer." And Angel meant it. He has felt crowded all day with everyone even Dawn hovered over him. The only person who actually kept their distance was Buffy and Giles. In fact the whole day those two were barely seen. He would see them working while everyone else studied him. Dawn latched on to him and it felt like he had to pry her off.

"Once you start slaying I think you'll get better, takes time I mean you were in Hell." Spike went on and Angel looked to him. That's why he was brought back because they all thought he was in Hell. It made sense and it was a logical conclusion but it wasn't true.

"Yeah." Angel took another drag on his cigarette. Angel sat there thinking about today though. Other then the drive around Sunnydale and going to the place where he died he didn't see Buffy much. Angel sat with Dawn after dinner and stayed with her until his little sister fell asleep. When he finally went to his room Buffy was asleep. He knows he needs to talk to her. She might not be able to solve the problems but she will listen and she will not judge.

Angel walked the mansion and made sure everything was good. Spike was out walking the grounds again and he'll be gone by sunrise. Everything was quiet as Angel headed upstairs and then went to Dawn's room and looked in. His sister was still asleep and then he opened the door to his room and closed it quietly behind him. He started for the bed but stopped as he saw Buffy sleeping. She hadn't moved since he left.

He hasn't given her much attention and she was probably the one who needed it the most. She just told him how hard it was for her. She's kept this group together, she's kept it alive and safe. She's kept herself together and there were plenty of times for her to actually give up. He gave up once and walked out on them for a whole summer. But she didn't, she stayed, she stayed and continued to fight. Buffy has always been that shadow and at the end of the day she's done more for this group, more for him than anyone will ever know.

If he can open up to her then maybe he'll be ok. But he has to open up. Right now though Buffy does need him. Just the way she was holding him before he got out of bed meant she was afraid to let him go again. She can if she had to and for Angel, Buffy was the real deal. She was a hero in all this but she won't allow herself to admit it. She has kept this town safe and has stopped the Hell Mouth from opening on her own while facing her demon torturer. If anyone around here deserved a break it was her.

Angel climbed into the bed and then looked at her as she slept. He could tell she didn't sleep much. It wasn't all because he was gone although that was a big factor. She would have nightmares, she dreamt about Hell again, the stress of protecting everyone, the stress of not knowing what will happen. It's taken its toll on her. When he was around they shared those stresses but once he made the jump it all fell to her. And she's done and always has done the best she could with what she had. Maybe he'll never appreciate her enough even though he's always grateful to her. Just as Angel was about reach out to her there was a soft knock on the door.

He felt a huge sting in his chest as he wanted to be with Buffy. They were together last night but instead of holding her all night he just sat there. And during the day he was either quiet or having people flutter around him. He hasn't spent the time he needed and wanted with her as she was waiting patiently for him. Every time he went to turn his attention to Buffy someone else wanted him and this was no different. Angel climbed out of the bed looking to Buffy making sure she was asleep. Angel made it to the door and it was Dawn.

"I thought I heard something." Dawn sounded groggy and Angel left the room shutting the door behind him to check the mansion again. It was probably nothing and just Dawn's way of saying she want to be with her brother. Once that was done he went to Dawn's room and with out words he knew Dawn wanted him to stay with her.

Angel wasn't asleep well not deep enough because he opened his eyes. He slowly sat up and then saw Dawn's clock. He's been in here for a while. He loved his sister but he wanted to be with Buffy before everyone wakes up and starts to study him. Only problem was Dawn seemed to have a tight grip on him and he knew if he pulls away she'll wake up.

Angel managed to get away from Dawn without waking her. He went to his room, shut and locked the door behind him. Angel crawled into the bed and then since his return he finally watched Buffy sleep. He smiled a little and leaned in kissing her forehead and just stayed there for a moment. He then rested his forehead against hers. He wanted to wake her but hated waking her. Angel rolled to his back hoping he can close eyes and not be afraid of waking up in a box. He then heard a groan meaning Buffy was becoming aware she wasn't where she felt asleep.

"Angel?" It was a whisper and Angel rolled over and before she could ask anything else he kissed her. She was somewhat awake for the kiss but liked it. Angel kind of wanted to ask Buffy if they wanted to leave and just get away so no one will knock on the door and bother them. They could but then everyone would freak out and search. They'll make do here and Angel pulled her in for a hug and rolled onto his back.

"You don't sleep do you." Angel whispered and Buffy shrugged.

"Four hours, it's fine." Angel then ran his fingers through her hair. She looked so tired that's one thing he picked up on when he came back. "I'm ok. I know you aren't sleeping but then again you just got back." Maybe that's why, he hasn't adjusted yet.

"Can I ask you something?" Angel wanted to know and Buffy nodded. "When you woke up as a vampire, did you ever have dreams about waking up in your coffin again?"

"Angel," She knew what this was about. It's a horrible experience and she never thought he'd actually go through it. "You're not going to wake up there I promise. You'll wake up here with me." Angel just pulled her in for a hug and she was warm again. She pulled away and then sat up while getting on top and straddling him. Angel sat up while placing both hands on her cheeks and kissed her. They had about two hours before the mansion would wake up. The clothes came off pretty quickly as they were just in PJ bottoms, sweats and shirts.

They have until sunrise to be together because then everyone will want to ask Angel how he's doing, look to see if he's changing and anything else to indicate if something was wrong. In all honesty Angel didn't want to think about walking passed that door. Buffy didn't ask how he was she waited until he was ready to express it. She didn't hound him she just sat quietly. She wasn't going to judge because she no reason to. So here, in the room was the best place to be.

Also he got to be with her finally. That's what he wanted all day just to be alone with her because she didn't ask him every five minutes if he was ok. Can he just stay here? Does he have to go back into reality when the sun rises? For now there was no need to think about that he just needed to focus on the here and now and that was Buffy. The only good thing about coming back was that she was still here and still the same. That's something he can always count on.

Tonight was better than last night. Last night was something fast because Buffy wasn't sure if it was a cruel dream that would leave her crying when she woke up. Because she woke up and he was still here it was all real. So tonight she can actually enjoy it. So they kissed, caressed and felt each other. Angel was fine for now, the feeling of being unhappy and alone was gone at the moment.

Buffy looked up to him as he rocked, things will get better he just needs time. Angel leaned in for more kisses and she wanted more too. In another minute he'll collapse on her and just maybe they can sleep.

---

Dawn woke up, got dressed and ready but when neither Angel or Buffy came out of the room she was worried. She did have school today and she lightly knocked on the door. Inside the room Angel and Buffy were asleep, in a deep sleep. They both needed it especially Buffy. Buffy had both her arms wrapped around Angel's waist and her head was half on his chest half on his stomach. Angel had one arm around her and the other was hanging off the side of bed. They didn't hear the knock and even if they did they weren't going to answer. The outside will have to wait as they were on their own terms right now and they both needed the sleep and to just be wrapped in each other.

It was a dark place. There was no place to go as he reached out. There were walls everywhere. He banged on the walls wondering where he was. He couldn't see anything but felt the walls and it felt like they were caving in.

"Buffy!" Angel yelled for her. "Buffy! Help!" He tried to hold the walls while he was on his back and had no room to move. "Buffy!"

Angel sat up looking around. His quick and violent waking up made Buffy wake up too. He looked around and just like she promised he wasn't in the box. But he still felt trapped.

"Angel," Buffy was woken out of the deep sleep she was actually getting. "It's ok." She whispered and he looked to her. "It's ok," And then she hugged him. His heart was racing in fear but it started to slow down. He took in a deep breath holding her and he was shaking a little. "It's ok." They both laid back down in the bed and Buffy got a glance of the clock. It was light outside Buffy could tell by the light trying to go through the curtains. The clock was reading eight thirty in the morning. Dawn should be in school by now and either Giles or Doyle took her.

The mansion was empty when both Angel and Buffy came downstairs and to the kitchen. It was nice to be left alone though and they needed it. But it was short lived as some one walked into the mansion, it was Willow. She was probably here to see if Angel has changed in anyway. They were coming up to that seventy-two hour mark. The tension between the witch and the vampire was very thick. They have yet to speak.

"Morning," Willow greeted them and Buffy just turned her back to Willow and went back into the kitchen. Willow then looked to Angel as he sat at the table looking to the witch. "How you feel?" Willow asked as she sat down just a few chairs down.

"I'm fine." Angel answered as he had a cup of coffee and sipped it. In the kitchen Buffy could hear what was going and she couldn't have Willow here. Something about the redhead made her nervous. She was able to raise the dead and to do so you have to be powerful. Willow was here to not see if Angel was ok but she was still looking for the thank you she hasn't gotten yet. Coming here asking how Angel was just the cover up.

"Maybe tonight we can go on patrol? I mean I think we got the vampires running scared now that slayer is back." Willow had a smile as Angel sat there. Part of Angel wanted to patrol maybe that'll help him a little. "Plus the town is getting back to normal so yeah." Angel didn't say anything as he sat there in silences. "Angel?"

"I'm fine." It was a snap because that's the tone Willow had. How many times will he get asked this question. He wasn't going to find out as he got up and walked out to the back. Buffy heard the whole conversion and stood there as Willow got up watching Angel leave. She then went to meet up with Buffy and the blonde vampire looked to the witch.

"Is he ok?" Willow wanted to know.

"If he's not," Buffy finally said something to her. "I'll deal with it myself." Meaning if Angel goes bad, he turns into something else Buffy will end it. Those were the words spoken between the two. That's what hurt Buffy the most the fact that something can go wrong and she would have to watch Angel die for a third time all because Willow wanted to use magic for her own cause. Willow never took in the considerations the rest of the team did and went ahead bringing someone back. No one should return from the dead least of all one of their own.

"Buffy, I did you a favor." Willow was getting tired of this. "I brought him back for you and Dawn." Buffy didn't say anything to her.

Outside Angel stood there looking into the distance seeing the shadow with wings again. It was staring at him. Angel had no weapons with him to take it out. They just stared at each other and Angel wondered what it was. It shouldn't be here that much was felt. It shouldn't be here one because of the protection placed on the mansion and it's grounds. And two it felt out of place like it was taken from another world and placed here much like Angel was.

Angel started back inside but he stopped as he felt a little dizzy and then looked to the wall of nearby paintings. In one painting it was of a river passing through the woods at least that's what it should be. But Angel saw the river was blood and the forest was on fire. Angel closed his eyes and reopened them hoping the image would go away. It did but he didn't like what he saw. Maybe he just needed more sleep but as he walked he saw something drip to the floor and when he looked down it was blood.

Angel looked up to the ceiling seeing a pool of blood forming and he quickly walked around it wanting to get away. When he turned back it was gone. Something wasn't right but was he seeing things or just going crazy? Angel headed back to the dining area and Willow was leaving the kitchen and Angel stopped dead in his tracks seeing her. Her eyes were black, her hair black and he saw blue veins all over her. Willow smiled at him a wicked smile.

"It's you and me kid, we're going to ride our way down to Hell. It's going to be great and it won't hurt one bit." Willow's voice was even different. Angel closed his eyes and took in a deep breath and then Willow was normal again.

"Angel?" She asked and the slayer just walked away and wanted to hide in his room. Buffy came out as soon as Angel started to walk away. She wanted to follow him make sure he was ok but then again he needs to be alone too. Angel made it up to his room and sat on the edge of the bed and started to here whispering like thousands of people were talking to him. He closed his eyes trying to shut it out. It wasn't going away though.

Angel then looked up seeing Buffy standing there. He needed to tell her what he's seeing and hearing. Just then something came out from behind her. It looked like Buffy but it wasn't. The eyes, the smile it was different he knew who it was, Elizabeth.

"Look who's alive and kicking again." Elizabeth smiled to him.

"Angel, what's wrong please tell me." Buffy begged but the slayer looked away.

"Oh, god gag me. All soul having and sensitive. Oh baby tell me, let me hold your hand." Elizabeth mocked and Angel looked up to Elizabeth. Buffy could tell Angel wasn't looking at her though. Buffy went to look behind her but there was nothing. "Oh, she can't see me, it's just you can me sweetie."

"Angel?" Buffy continued to stand there knowing something was wrong.

"You're going crazy or maybe you were always crazy." Elizabeth leaned against the doorframe. "Or you're just as sane as I am." She smiled bigger. "I'll be honest I missed you, wasn't nearly as much fun when you were dead." Buffy then walked over to Angel and sat down next to him.

"Talk to me." She wanted to know what was happening. Then Elizabeth stood up straight and took out a knife and twirled it.

"Talk dirty to me Angel." Elizabeth smiled at him as she walked over and sat on the other side of Buffy.

"Buffy," Angel wasn't sure if he should say anything. Maybe he did come back wrong. Angel then saw a photo of him on the nightstand well it should be of him. It was cover in blood. Angel looked away as Elizabeth smiled.

"What are you seeing?" Buffy asked and he looked to her as Elizabeth wrapped her arms around Buffy holding the knife to her throat.

"This is fun isn't it, you don't know if this is real or not. So much better than HBO. The paint is starting to peel away." Elizabeth then cut the knife against Buffy throat, which caused Angel to get away. Buffy sat there though as nothing happened. Elizabeth laughed and did it again. "So much fun!" She had the biggest girlish glee look on her face.

"I, I can't," Angel stammered as Buffy stood up.

"Oh you can," Elizabeth went on. "You want to know how to end this well that's up to you. It ends when you can't take it anymore." Elizabeth explained as she laid in bed. "Oooo two of us in bed at the same time how much fun could we have."

"Angel what is it?" Buffy demanded.

"I see her." Angel answered as Elizabeth sat up.

"Who?" Buffy got closer to him.

"Elizabeth." Buffy then looked to the bed where Angel was staring at. She saw nothing but Angel saw Elizabeth waving to Buffy smiling. "She's right there." Then Elizabeth blew a kiss to Angel.

"Come on, we need to find Giles." That's the only thing they could do at this point.

"The man with the answers." Elizabeth got up and followed them and Angel wasn't sure if he could take this much longer. Buffy helped by doing one thing making sure he focused on her and only her even though Elizabeth danced around.

---

Now driving was going to be interesting so to make sure Angel doesn't drive off the road Buffy took the wheel. In the backseat was Elizabeth driving with them. The radio was off but Elizabeth was singing for them. But only Angel could hear it.

"Ooook-lahoma, where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain and the wavin' wheat can sure smell sweet!" Elizabeth carried on and Angel did everything to block it out. Buffy could see his distress. "When the wind comes right behind the rain. Oklahoma, ev'ry night my honey lamb and I sit alone and talk and watch a hawk makin' lazy circles in the sky."

"What's she saying?" Buffy asked as Angel looked very distressed.

"She's singing." Angel answered quickly. Buffy could only imagine what her alter ego was singing about. From Angel's looks it was something annoying too.

"We know we belong to the land and the land we belong to is grand! And when we say
Yeeow! Ayipioeeay! We're only sayin' you're doin' fine, Oklahoma! Oklahoma O.K.!" Elizabeth continued on as Angel closed his eyes. Elizabeth leaned in and wrapped her arms around him still singing. Buffy would glance to keep her eye on him. Angel buried his face in his hands as he tried to not to listen but she was singing in his ear and smiling.
"Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla-Okla...We know we belong to the land and the land we belong to is grand!"

Buffy reached out and put her hand onto his knee trying to offer him comfort as Elizabeth kept singing. "And when we say Yeeow! Aye-yip-aye-yo-ee-ay! We're only sayin' you're doin' fine, Oklahoma! Oklahoma O.K. L - A - H - O - M – A! OKLAHOMA! Yeeow!" Elizabeth ended the song smiling and kissed Angel's cheek. "This is so much fun are you having fun?" She then turned to Buffy who could not see her. "You having fun Buffy?" Buffy didn't response and then Elizabeth turned back to Angel and kissed his cheek again "God I've missed you Angel."

"Shut up!" Angel yelled and Elizabeth laughed and sat down in the backseat. Buffy looked to Angel and she had no idea what to do for him. Angel kept his eyes closed as Elizabeth kept on ranting.

At the magic shop everyone was busy. Willow was following Angel and Buffy here as she had no idea what was going on. Buffy pulled up and Angel got out of the car while Elizabeth climbed out too and three walked into the shop. Willow pulled up right behind them and raced to the shop.

"Giles!" Buffy called out and the Watcher came from the counter and he saw Angel was looking white, almost sick like. "We have problems."

"Giles!" Elizabeth called out but like Buffy, Giles could not see her. Angel closed his eyes trying to think of something nice.

---

Buffy explained to Giles what she knew so far and the Watcher looked to Angel. He sat quietly and that's all he saw. For Angel Elizabeth was sitting next to him pushing him and being annoying.

"Something had to have set it off." Giles started.

"Or something is wrong with Angel and he's going crazy." Anya added and everyone glared at her. Giles then went over to Angel and sat next to him.

"Hey," Giles wanted Angel to focus on him and the slayer looked up. "How long have you've been seeing things?" He asked.

"Well, you guys do hunt ghost and stuff, I think you're all crazy." Elizabeth added and Angel closed his eyes brushing it off. If anyone can help its Giles. Elizabeth got up and went to sit next to Giles so she can continue to distract Angel.

"Um," Angel had to think but it's hard to do that when you have someone constantly in your ear talking. "I saw a uh, some shadow with wings just outside yesterday."

"He's losing it." Elizabeth interrupted.

"Saw it again last night at the mansion and this morning too." Angel finished looking at Giles.

"That's not all you saw, come on." Elizabeth coaxed him.

"It's just not Elizabeth I see." Meaning he's seeing other things too. Giles nodded knowing he needs to help but they need to hit the books first.

"Research time!" Elizabeth clapped with startled Angel. The rest of the A-Team that was there knew something was going on and they wish they could see it. "You know Angel," Elizabeth scooted closer to him as Giles got up. "You save the world, you're the man who saved the world and now look at you. You're going crazy, hard to believe four months ago you gave the human race a second chance." Elizabeth then watched as the group went to start researching. "They brought you back from heaven. You're a fallen angel when you think about it. They clipped your wings and now you're in Hell, well Hell on earth."

"Shut up." Angel demanded and she smiled.

"Oh come on, that's what you think isn't it?" Elizabeth asked. "I mean you were in paradise living free and now you have to deal with all their shit again. All the human emotions and what make humans so worthless. You became above that and now you're back." Elizabeth got closer. "You should tell them what they did to you especially the witch."

"You're not real." Angel was trying to convince himself more than anything.

"Oh, I'm real and I'm just getting started. I want to crack you open." Elizabeth smiled. "I live and love to torture and come to think I'm torturing two of my favorite people. You because well look at you it hasn't even been a day yet. And then Buffy, she has to watch you." The soulless vampire then crawled on top of Angel. "Wanna have a round getting bored waiting for these people figure it out. It'll pass the time."

Angel looked away as Elizabeth was straddling him. "You've done Buffy but you have no idea what I can do." She smiled as him and Angel got up to pace. "Pacing won't help you. You know what you can do to make it stop and I can help you. I wanted to help Buffy." Angel stopped pacing and looked to her Elizabeth smiled. "Uh oh, someone's understanding." Angel looked away and had to go to Buffy.

Buffy was in the books and she was looking up demons along with Doyle and Cordelia. Xander and Anya left to hit the streets to see if anyone else could be going mental because last year there was a wave of madness. All possibilities had to be considered. Giles was looking up mental states of mind and Willow was giving him all she knew about the spell. Maybe not all of his mind came back intact. Again Giles thought Willow should have been smarter about this and not do it. Angel came into the room with Elizabeth skipping in behind him.

"I think I found it!" Buffy announced it.

"By Gorge I think she's got it." Elizabeth looked to Angel and Buffy came over from the table as everyone wanted to know as Buffy brought the book over. She showed Angel the picture. "Oooo, creepy."

"Yeah." Angel confirmed the picture as Giles took the book from Buffy to read it.

"They're called Ravens," Giles started. "Wing demons of Hell they eat the souls of Hell."

"Winner, winner chicken dinner." Elizabeth looked to Angel.

"How did it get here?" Cordelia asked. "And what does it want?"

"Well, they aren't really found on our plains that's the thing. They have to come out of Hell and are somewhat more like demon pets." Giles went on.

"Another demon crawled out of Hell?" Doyle asked and seems like it. "Ok, how?" Giles then looked to Willow.

"Care to explain what your spell did?" Giles wanted to make sure everyone knew.

"The spell opens up three places, Heaven, Hell and Earth. It allows the soul we want to come back." Willow summed it up.

"So you opened Hell up for a small amount of time?" Oz asked and Willow nodded.

"This Raven might have been at the opening and flew out but it doesn't explain Angel's hallucinations." Giles was still stumped.

"Oh, foiled again." Elizabeth interjected. "Looks like you are going crazy." Angel was still trying with all he had to ignore her.

"So killing it won't do anything for him?" Xander asked as he and Anya walked in catching the talk. Giles both sighed and shrugged at the same time. Maybe Angel really was losing it. "But it's following him."

"Angel was its ride so to speak so it's probably around here right now." Giles went on.

"Nice pet then Angel." Cordelia deadpanned and Angel ignored it.

"Looks like I'm camping here for a while then, should be fun." Elizabeth relaxed as she leaned up against Angel.

"Anything that stands out about Elizabeth?" Giles looked to Angel and he looked to his Watcher.

"She's driving me crazy." Angel answered.

"Ok one thing at a time then." Buffy had to do this in steps. First the Raven from Hell needs to go. "You say it's following him because he helped it out?" Giles nodded. "Then Angel can lead it to us, I'm sure cutting it's head off will do the trick."

"Oooo, don't you get all tingly when Buffy takes control?" Elizabeth asked to Angel and once again he tried to ignore it. "You can't kill it because while it's following you it has a master." Elizabeth then leaned into Angel and he leaned a way a little. "It's master knows everything so your plan won't work."

"It found me and I started to see Elizabeth." Angel spoke up and they all looked to him. "She's saying its master is here too." Elizabeth was trying to make them figure it out while having fun.

"It's master is a demon so what demon?" Anya asked.

"God you guys," Elizabeth was getting frustrated. "These are the people who save the world? They're the ones who foiled all my plans?" She then turned to Angel. "Really? I can't believe them, whinny, little brats destroyed me. I had a good thing going once nearly had what I wanted then you guys somehow seem to stumble on the answer." She looked to Angel and he looked back. "It's ridiculous you guys." Angel tried to shut it out but it was like she was getting louder and louder. "Hate all of you."

"Just shut up." Angel muttered and that caught Buffy's attention while everyone else was trying to form a plan.

"No, you know what Angel, I think you hearing me, you hearing the truth." Elizabeth stood there. "You know it's true, this group is worthless. All they do is complain and fail and if they do win it's at the last second. No wonder you wanted to die I would too." Angel just stared at her hard. "You did want to die, it wasn't a gift it was you trying to be free well again I can help."

Angel turned away and then Elizabeth circled him and then got closer to him resting her head on his shoulder. "It's so obvious."

"She's says it's obvious." Angel decided to play the game knowing that's what Elizabeth wanted. Buffy then sat next to Angel.

"What else anything else?" Buffy asked and Angel thought about it.

"Come on Angel, you can do it, think, think, think," Elizabeth taunted him so more. "As soon as you say it Buffy's going to freak. It's really that obvious I just gave you all the answer, this has happened before." Angel kept thinking on what Elizabeth was telling him.

"She says she's here for fun," Angel kept thinking and then he turned to Elizabeth and she smiled nodding meaning go on. "She says it only ends in one way." Buffy kept listening as did everyone else. "She wants to torture me and you." Buffy's eyes widen.

"Uh oh, took her long enough." Elizabeth smiled as Buffy stood up.

"Buffy?" Giles asked and she looked to the Watcher.

"It's not Elizabeth he's seeing it's Cruciate." Buffy figured it out and Angel looked to Elizabeth and she nodded.

"I'm going to torture you and in turn it tortures her. Not going any where because I was before everything." Elizabeth stated or rather it was Cruciate as Angel stood up and he went to Buffy. "I've cracked into you're mind Angel, you can't get rid of me. You'll see me as Elizabeth and I'm going to drive you crazy so much so you're going to kill yourself and Buffy has to watch. That's the greatest torture." But that wasn't all there was something else about what she said to him.

---

Angel told everyone what the plan was while Elizabeth walked around and once in awhile Angel would track her. The Raven came out of Hell to find its master. It will need to feed and kill soon. It was attracted to Angel because it followed him out plus it's master Cruciate was now in Angel's head. But there was another plan brewing in secret.

Dawn was filled in after school and Spike once the sun went down. Everyone headed to the cemetery to kill this thing. Angel went to his gravesite because both of them came from here and now they wait. It looked like Angel was standing there alone but Elizabeth was talking to him.

"I took this form because this is the person you fear and hate the most." Cruciate explained. "Pretty soon you won't know what's real. You'll go crazy. Also if you kill my Raven I'll kill the next pet you get just so you know." Elizabeth or Cruciate whatever it was talked Angel's ear off.

---

In the distance Buffy walked over to Willow and Oz as they were standing there waiting. Willow saw Buffy and was ready be yelled saying this was her fault too.

"Buffy I know," Willow started.

"Yeah it is but you can fix it for a time being." Buffy started and Willow looked to her. "I need you to do a spell, create something to block Cruciate out from Angel's mind, from all of our minds because he'll jump." Willow nodded understanding.

"I can do a bind spell on Angel and protection on us." Willow stated and Buffy nodded just then they heard flapping noises and looked up.

"That ain't birds." Oz added. Angel waited at his gravesite and looked up hearing the wings beating.

"Surics is here." Elizabeth looked up and out of nowhere the wing demon swooped down to Angel. He jumped out of the way as it hovered. Everyone saw it and it was all black. "Go easy boy." Elizabeth called out to her pet. Just then an arrow went through the night. The Raven dodged it and then flew too Buffy and jumped out of the way. There was no way for anyone to get at it. Elizabeth clapped with a smile knowing this was fun. "Who should Surics eat first hmm," Elizabeth looked around and saw Cordelia.

"Cordelia move!" Angel yelled and Doyle went into demon for as the Raven came after her. Both Cordelia and Doyle took a swipe at the thing. Behind the headstone Willow began to chant. She was creating the binding spell to keep Elizabeth from appearing to Angel until they can figure out a way to send Cruciate back to Hell.

Then the Raven went after Giles but Spike pushed the Watcher and then felt something cut him across the face. Spike went down and now the Raven went after Dawn. Angel's had enough. He held up his new crossbow and aimed and pulled the trigger. Elizabeth's eyes widen as the arrow caught the Raven in the wing and pinned it to the tree.

"No!" Elizabeth yelled as Angel reloaded the crossbow and used the scope and pulled the trigger and the arrow went into the head. "You bastard! I'm going to enjoy watching you lose you're mind!" Just then Elizabeth looked around and she looked nervous. "What are you doing?" She asked and Angel looked confused.

"Liga, continentia, castitas. Imago haec et similia, non subsistam. Mentis et córporis hóstibus tueáris, ad protegendum corpus. Nunc ergo ingressus!" Willow yelled and Elizabeth looked to Angel.

"It's not over Angel." Elizabeth or Cruciate threatened. "You really think a demon like Samhain would know to summon me? I was asked no I was told to be here by someone greater than any demon. You may not see me but you will see my master and what I am doing to you will be no comparison to what he will do to you and Buffy. He's going to drag you both to Hell." Willow finished and then she was gone.

Buffy ran to Angel and jumped into his arms. He looked around and no Elizabeth, no voices. He then looked to Willow as she was able to save his mind. But it was just a spell and if ever broken he'll see Cruciate in Elizabeth form again. But it'll buy time so they send him back to Hell.

---

The night was ending while downstairs in the mansion everyone was getting their mind shielded so Cruciate can't harm them.

"So this will keep Cruciate from crawling back into us?" Dawn asked.

"That sounds dirty." Spike added.

"How many demons are we going to kill because they're crawling out of Hell?" Xander wanted to know because it seemed to be happening a lot. "What the hell people?" That was a good question and the only way they'll know is to wait and see. Upstairs Angel sat on the bed. Buffy came up and sat next to him knowing to day was only making his return worse.

"Should I ask?" Buffy meant should she ask how he was doing. Angel shrugged knowing seeing Elizabeth again was hard hitting. But to know it was the demon that tortured Buffy it made it harder. "Angel, I haven't been in Hell for a while but I still know a thing or two about torment." Angel then looked to her.

"I was heaven Buffy. I was happy, I was free." Finally he was opening up. "I was complete, it was over I did what was asked of me." Angel let out a sigh. "Elizabeth, Cruciate whatever it is was right. I was ripped from paradise. I was torn out of there by my friends." He looked to her and Buffy looked to him. "Everything here is hard and bright and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch. This is Hell. Being back is Hell for me. Getting through the next moment and then the one after knowing where I was and I can't go back because they'll just bring me back. I've lost." He finished and Buffy had tears.

"I'm so sorry." Buffy meant it because now he was suffering.

"I'll just do what I've always done." He looked to her. "Just smile no matter how fake it is." Buffy then put a hand on his cheek.

"I will too." And she has but now they can do it together. They both leaned in resting their foreheads together. They were both being tortured in their own way suffering Hell on earth. They just hoped with time it'll get better.

Uh oh, I think you guys are seeing the cracks now. Angel's back for one day and everything goes to Hell. Oh we're just getting started. And then we got Angel and his issues, yes it's a mess. Told you guys this chapter had some twists in it. Got a review in the forum on this one. Also there's a sneak peek here and in the forum as well. Also if anyone got lost on the Elizabeth, Rick and Nemo part go and read Blackest Night by Nikon the Vampire. That'll clear everything up plus he's my awesome Beta reader and doesn't get the credit he deserves so show him love. So, what do you guys think? You liking everything so far? Let me know. Thank you for reading, commenting and being fans, you're all awesome.

Chapter Bloodshed

There was one other person he might be able to talk to. So Angel drove up to the church. Maybe because he went to heaven being here could help. Maybe Michael will have some insight plus Angel hasn't visited the priest since his return then again it's not like he had the time. Angel parked the car and started for the church. The sun was setting soon and he'll meet the others at the graveyard for his first patrol back. Angel stepped into the quiet church. When Sunnydale was under attack this was the safe haven for those who could not fight. It was holy grounds and maybe here Angel is the safest from the outside.

The place hasn't changed at all as he started down the aisle. A few people were scattered about praying. The man he was looking for was at the alter with his hands up praying. Angel stopped as soon as he got to the first step. Angel cleared his throat and the priest turned around and his eyes widen. Michael didn't move as he saw the dead slayer before him.

"Mich," But before Angel could finish Michael had a small vial of holy water on him and opened the vial tossing the water on him. Angel closed his eyes as the water went all over him but nothing happened as Michael stood there in shock. Angel reached up and wiped the water from his eyes. "It's me." Michael got closer unsure about this. "It's really me."

"I buried you." Michael stated, there was no hello, no I'm glad you're back. Angel just stood there as the young priest stood on the last step giving him maybe half an inch over Angel. "I buried you on a rainy day. I gave you a prayer of benediction and even when I knew you were dead before putting you in the ground I gave you your last rites. You died."

"I know." Angel knew this was a shock to Michael. "I know, I was brought back by Willow." Michael looked confused.

"That's not right." Michael sounded worried and nervous. Angel already knew this though. "You died."

"Believe I wish I stayed that way but I'm here." Angel stated and almost felt like walking away.

"How long?" Michael asked still not wrapping his head around this. Angel had to be something else.

"Two days, three-ish." Angel answered so it was recent and in the last few days everyone in town was busy. "I just came to see you so if you saw me you would know." Angel then went to leave but Michael went after him and escorted him to a pew knowing the slayer was lost. But something was so wrong between the both of them.

"Well, welcome home." Michael started and Angel sighed and looked around. Michael felt something was at uneven balance, a levy was broken. "Any…side effects?"

"You mean do I crave human flesh no. Am I going crazy? Maybe." Angel never looked Michael in the eye for some reason it felt like he couldn't. It felt like there was this strange heat or force keeping a space between them. "It's fixed for now, Cruciate welcomed me home." Michael knew the name. Angel felt like he needed to go.

Michael knew something was off and it was more than just Angel's demeanor. It was everything about him, his presence was…lost. He was here but he did not carry himself as the man he was before his death. It was like something was taken. Not only that it felt like something was shoved here where it does not belong. It was there was a space that was only meant for a circle but you're trying to jam a square into it.