Lina sat on her bed the tears slowly dripping down her nose, the cellphone recharges on her desk, holding the cordless phone she punches in her phone number. Getting her answer machine she types in her code, listen to the automatic voice, "Twenty-three unheard message, Message one..." Lina listen to the desperate cries of her boyfriend his voice becoming emotional after the first couple message by the last message he was sobbing into the phone, "Lina pick-up the phone, Please answer me Lina! Are you hurt or in the hospital, are you even alive its been nearly a week. Amelia doesn't mean anything to me, I know your there or are you dead? PLEASE CALL ME BACK!" Lina drops the phone on to the bed after an hour of listening then wipes her tears of her cheeks, luck for her it was the weekend and she wouldn't have to see Zelagidis or talk to him, not after him yelling at her. "I am a really bitch, a stupid one at that." Lina closes her eyes thinking about all that had happened, ignoring the phone at her feet she tries desperately to block it out. The phone didn't stop ringing at all, someone kept on calling the house. Finally after an hour of annoying beeping, she picks it answering in a not cheery tone, "Hello this is Lina, who am I speaking to?" The person lets a sigh, "Lina your home? I thought that you would be at Zelgadis house or something, I got a little worried when you didn't come to the party." Lina stops frowning as tears glaze her cheeks, "Party? What Party, I didn't know about it?" Gourry lets out a low sigh, "Didn't you get the message I left you earlier today, Its his 18th birthday. I thought you of all people would come."
Lina blinks back in shock, smacking her forehad, "Oh that message Gourry, I thought it would be better if I just didn't go, he is still really angry at me. I can't face him now, I didn't get him anything at all." Gourry Hmphs loudly, "Some girlfriend you are Lina, you don't even come to see him on his birthday, its been a whole day, have you even called him." Lina laughs into the phone, "You must have the wrong idea, we aren't dating anymore. I broke up with him, don't you know that, I guess he hasn't told you yet." Gourry takes a deep breath, covering the phone shouting back at someone, "Apparently Zelgadis isn't under that impression, he has been asking about you. He is still worried about you, he was also under the impression that you would call him later. Funny how your stories don't match up to his." Lina groans loudly, "We never really were dating anyway, he is more interested in Amelia anyway. I mean come on its just that way, I thought maybe I could fight for him but I lost my chance with him now, he is just confused as to who he's with at this moment. And I won't be calling him anytime soon, tell him happy birthday for me." Gourry voice waviers, "Lina come on wait, he's right here, he wants to..." Lina turns the phone off going to place it on the receiver, Gourry blinks placing the phone in his pocket again, "She hung up Zel, sorry man I guess she is ignoring you." Zelgadis's bites his lip, "What did she say to you Gourry? Is she all right?" Gourry finds himself unsure of what to say, it would crush his friend if he told him, "Not much you should talk to her when we get back to school."
Zelgadis smiles brightly as he goes back to his group of friends, still he seems a little sad his girlfriend wasn't even there. Amelia hands Zel a present, "Happy birthday Zelgadis, I was wondering if you are going to prom. Would you go with me? Don't tell me you can tell me later, think it over." Zel nods his head and laughs with his group of friends, every once in while watching the door for Lina. Lina sobs into her hands as she looks at the picture in her hand, Luna walks into the room and hugs her, "Lina whats wrong with you? Is Zel still mad at you? If he is you can talk it out with him and hey I have good news, I am getting married. And I want you be the maid of honor." Lina hides her pain hugging Luna back, "Congratulations Luna when were you going to tell me?" Luna wipes the last of her tears from her sisters face, "Lina is something wrong with you and Zel last time you just seemed so happy." Lina shakes the feelings off, "No we aren't really dating, I don't think we ever were. He likes Amelia I was just fooling myself again. When he saw he pretty much said that he didn't want to see me so I took that as my cue to leave his life. Then Gourry called and said he was looking for me at his Birthday party, he's 18 now. I won't be in his way anymore, I'm not good for him so I called if off." Luna looks at her sister then sighs, "Why would you think your not good for him Lina, you are one of the nicest people I know. Maybe you should reconsider this before you lose your chance, isn't love worth fighting for, don't you love him." Lina shakes her head, "I don't know anymore I think I am but thats just a useless emotion. I should never have let him into my life but then what would I be with out his help. He has changed me for the better but I just don't want to make him worry anymore." Luna frowns as she gets up, "Think about this before you go through with it, he could be your other half." Lina laughs loudly, "Don't be worried Luna, I'm fine without him. If you love someone let them go right." Luna lets out a pained sigh, "You give up to easily, you don't trust him do you? Maybe he loves you back Lina and you could be passing up love."
Lina curls up falling into a deep sleep, she couldn't help but dream about Zel everything about him in her dream so wonderful but she couldn't reach him no matter how hard she tried she couldn't reach, the next thing she knows someone is kissing her forehead. Lina slowly blinks as she sits up, "Hey Lina how have you been? Luna called me last me night saying that you were breaking up with?" Lina smiles throwing her arms around the illusion, the dream leaves her sight as she yawns getting up putting on her usual outfit for school, "It was all just a dream...I need to stop thinking about him, I only cause him pain." Lina runs to the bus stop with her backpack slung over her shoulder sliding on just as Zelgadis comes to a stop at her house, his eyes watching the bus leave, picking up his phone he calls her, Lina sighs answering her cell, "What is it you want?" Zelgadis blinks back pain, "Lina why didn't you come to my party, I was looking for you all night. You weren't there I wish you had come, I am sorry I yelled at you." Lina sighs then holds back the joy in her voice, "I thought you wouldn't want to see me Zel so I just stayed away, actaully I never really go the message at all only when Gourry called me I found out. I guess I should check my messages more often. Zel I want you to stop worrying about me, I'm not your problem. Anyway who are you going to the prom with?" Zel blinks checking the phone, "Is that really you Lina you don't seem like yourself, I'm not angry at you. What do you mean who am I going to prom with...I'm going with you."
Lina frowns wanting so much to talk to him like she always does, "I thought you would be going with someone else. You need to worry less about me and start worrying more about yourself." Zel freezes the hurting ringing through to her, "Lina whats wrong with you? Of course I am going to worry about you, I haven't seen you since thrusday and you haven't called me. I love..." Lina shouts into the phone, "Don't finish that sentence Mr. Greywords, you don't feel that way about me. We aren't even dating anymore are we, admit you just wanted to get to Amelia. Make her jealous, how could I fall for you. I am so stupid to think that you could actaully feel for me, I should have just ignored you." Zel panicks pulling into a parking space at the school, "What are you talking about...of course we're dating how could you not know that. I never said we aren't dating, Lina are we..." Lina turns off her phone shoving it in her purse, Zel stares at the phone confused at what she was saying, "She hung up on me." Zel gets out of his car as Gourry jogs over to him, "Hey did you talk to Lina? I think something is wrong with her, she was talking crazy on the phone yesterday. Says that you guys weren't dating." Zel closes his eyes then presses his fingers on his forehead. "She thinks we're not dating anymore, she thinks that we broke up. How, what is wrong with her."
Lina gets off the bus walking quickly to class avoiding the normal way she took, running directly into Amelia, the girl snarls then pushes Lina out of the way, "IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT THAT HE ISN'T WITH ME!" Lina smiles holding back the urge to counter her, "You can have him...he doesn't want me anyway Amelia. I have just been fooling myself into thinking that I love him." Amelia freezes feeling slightly sad, "Your just giving up on someone you love, not even fighting to keep them. I mean most girls would at least attempt to stop me from taking their boyfriends, I have liked him forever but..." Lina gets up storming off going into the building, "I don't need her sympathy I don't need her sympathy, not from her of all people. Of course I have no chance with him, I'm dilussional, a foolish girl, I don't love him...I don't love him...I don't love him...that dream meant nothing." The tears pouring down her cheeks as she hides next to the dumpster in the back, she couldn't face up to him not now, the phone rings, "Lina where are you? I have been looking for you all day at school, why didn't you come to class..." Lina sobs into the phone trying to be cold and unfeeling, "I have just been thinking that all...I can't hate you Zel. I just can't hate you at all. I hate myself so much more then I used to for thinking that I could love you." Zels starts to walk towards the back of the building, hearing the sobbing, "Lina calm down, I'm coming to talk to you." The phone goes dead and lina stands up, running as she hears him coming. Then stumbling into a mud puddle as he turns the corner blinking in surprise at the mud covered girl.
"Lina what are you doing way back here by yourself." Lina gets up sitting down against the dumpster, "Whats the use in running if you if it won't help Zelgadis? I keep on trying to love myself but can't seem to love me." Zel sits next to her, "Whats this about Lina? You said we aren't dating, acting so cold to me this morning. You have been crying all day haven't you, Lina what wrong with you?" Lina hides her face in her hands, "I'm all wrong for you Zelgadis, I make you worry for a week, don't come to your party then I act so cold. All I wanted to do this morning was sit next to you and talk happily to you but if I did I would decieve you into thinking that you loved me in someway." Zel laughs softly to himself feeling hurt at her words, "Lina if thats what you wanted why didn't you come out and say it on the phone. Gourry told me what you said on the phone, do you want to break up? Look me in the eye and tell me what you mean." Lina shakes her head as she stares deep into his eyes, "No I don't but if you did you could have someone so much prettier then me." Zel glares back at her, "Do you love me?" Lina gulps nervously as her tears dry, "no I don't..." The words were tearing her heart to shreads, Zel frowns, "You're lying to me Lina, Do you love me?" Lina takes a deep breath, "How can I love you so much? I don't mean to and it would be so much better if I couldn't. If Ididn't dream about you everynight but then it always turns out that I am a wedding but its not my own, its never my own. I feel so lonely."
Zelgadis watches her feeling like his heart is getting crushed, "Lina I want you take a look at yourself through my eyes now, I will tell you what I see. I see a beautiful red head with such sad eyes, looking miserable and lonely. She doesn't realize that she is one of the most important people in my life, yet she can't smile without making herself sad. She hates herself, missing all her beauty that is inside and while she has to chance for happiness she tries to kill it off. she thinks that by ignoring this feeling she won't hurt people but only hurts them more. Yet she is the most beautiful girl I have ever met, I am just wondering if you have seen her lately?" Lina shakes her head, "I haven't seen her lately, I don't even know who you are describing." Zel laughs kissing her cheeks, tickling her stomach, "Come on tell me where is she hiding? Under this sadness somewhere is my girlfriend lets see if I can find her." Zel presses his hand against her back and kisses her gently on the lips, Lina starts to laugh sniffling as he leans foreward to kissing her harder. Lina kisses him back feeling his hand come to her fingers, pulling away he smiles sadly at her, "Lina don't hide from me anymore okay, I worry about you more that way. I was really scared that you had died somewhere alone, so promise me next time you have a silly idea. Lina I don't want anything to happen to you, so you need to stop hating yourself." Lina hugs him, "Why is it I can't hate myself when you look at me that way? So scared that I will do something to hurt myself, why do you always worry so much about me?" Lina stokes Zel's cheek watching as he looks at her, "He sees me as beautiful, how is he can see that side of me"
Zelgadis stands up lifting Lina up easily in his arms, "Lina I want to finish what I was going to say on the phone, I love you for all you are even the bad parts. I just want you to remember that Lina. My Lina now one else can have you, I love you so much." Lina squirms around in his arms giggling as he tickles her stomach, carrying her bridle style from behind the building. Lina was laughing now trying not fall out of arms, "Thats the Lina I want to see, my angel." Gourry smiles at them, waving them over, Zel sets Lina down unwilling to let her go. "I knew you could work it out, you really should stop doubting yourself Lina. Zel loves you very much like you love him, you need to smile more often to make him happy. Then he will worry less about you, you owe him a birthday surprise." Lina looks down guilt running across her cheeks, Gourry waves his hand in front of her face, "Don't get sad on me Lina, Zel won't be happy then and neither will you." Zel laughs, "Yeah you owe Lina, so what are going to do about?"