Okay- So I lied when I said that I'd try to update before the winter break was over. I didn't really try at all. But here it is, an update, just in time for the Super Bowl! And it's a hell of a lot faster than my updates have been lately. (It's a Super Bowl miracle!)

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Rurouni Kenshin- yet. But I am planning on buying the copyright with my tax returns this year! (Whenever I get around to having my taxes filed...) I also don't own the chapter title. That would belong to The Shins. (I'm buying them with next year's return.)

Stalking Shinomori

By the Breakfast Cupcake of the Un-living

Chapter 7

Know Your Onion!

"Study buddies!" Misao chirped happily with a grin.

Kaoru looked up from her magazine. "What?"

Misao's grin transformed itself into a scowl. "Weren't you listening to anything I just said?"

"No, sorry." Kaoru apologized. "Say it again?"

"God, why do I even bother talking to you?" Misao complained, whacking Kaoru over the head with her notebook.

"What were you saying?" Kaoru asked again, rubbing her head.

Misao collapsed into the arm chair next to Kaoru's, lounging like a cat with one leg thrown over the arm of the chair. "I said," she began with a happy smile, "That Aoshi and I are study buddies."

Kaoru's magazine landed on the tile floor with a THWACK! She sat straight up and looked incredulously at her friend. "What! How did you manage that? I thought he hated you!"

Misao grinned. "It was easy, and he does. I failed the first test, miserably. So the good professor recommended I get someone in the class to help me study, and since Aoshi has the best grade in the class, she suggested he help me. It's very convenient, seeing as how he sits right next to me and all."

Kaoru snorted. "At least she can't accuse you of cheating this time."

"That's true." Misao agreed.

"I still don't get how he agreed to this 'study buddy' thing."

"St. Shinomori could never say no to a teacher, no matter how much he dislikes me." Misao said rolling her eyes. "Speaking of the devil…" she muttered under her breath as a familiarly tall, trench-coated figure emerged from one of the classrooms.

Misao waited patiently until he got near enough to hear her before she shouted "HEY! Shinomori! Don't forget!"

Aoshi glanced at her and nodded once as he passed, then quickened his pace and hurried on his way before she could say anything else to him.

Misao sighed contentedly. "Aoshi 'n me. Study buddies. Ain't life grand?"

Kaoru shook her head. "That poor, poor man." she muttered.

Misao sat with a look of utmost concentration on her face.

She willed her muscles not to move as she focused with all her might on his hands.

The tips of her fingers twitched.

SLAP!

She hadn't even seen it coming, his movements were too quick. He was just too good at this damn game.

"OOOOOW!" Misao roared, rubbing the red marks on the backs of her hands where he had slapped her. "Sano, you bastard!"

"YES! YES! I win, again! I am the slap MASTER! HAHA!" Sano crowed. "You lose! Again! Loser!"

Misao growled, still rubbing her poor abused hands.

"Loser! LOSER! Loo-oooser!" Sano chanted, pointing repeatedly at Misao.

"Shove that finger at me one more time, and I'll break it off." Misao muttered darkly.

Sano leapt out of his chair, spun around, and slapped his ass. "KISS IT, LOSER!" he shouted happily.

From somewhere behind Misao, a throat cleared. They both turned to see who it was.

"Oh! Hey Aoshi!" Misao said brightly, waving a tomato red hand at him.

Aoshi inwardly rolled his eyes and groaned. This would be hell. "Hello, Makimachi." he said flatly.

Sano smirked. "I'll leave you two to 'study.'" He said, putting quotation marks around the word 'study' with his fingers.

Aoshi felt a little piece of himself die inside.

Misao threw her pencil at the back of Sano's head as he turned to leave, but it fell short and rolled harmlessly away.

"You throw like a girl." Sano called over his shoulder as he left. "And you're still the loser!"

"Bastard." Misao muttered, clenching a fist.

Aoshi dropped his books onto the table, and sat down across from Misao with trepidation. He eyed her across the table uneasily, as if she were a convicted murderer he was visiting. But if that were the case, there would've been a Plexiglas window between them. Here, there was just a table. No phones, no armed cops at the door. Just Misao.

Misao flipped her book open to a random page, and leaned back in her chair, folding her arms under her breasts. "So tutor me, tutor man." she said with a smirk.

God, what he wouldn't give for a Plexiglas window.

Aoshi rolled his eyes and turned her book to the right page.

"Huh? We're only on chapter 8?" Misao asked, leaning forward to look at the page he turned to. "That bitch's been talking so much, I figured we'd be further along by now."

Aoshi threw his hands up exasperatedly. "Don't you know anything about the class?"

Misao thought for a moment. "I know I don't like it." she said with a shrug.

"Oh God." Aoshi mumbled. Why was he even wasting his time on this annoying girl? "Okay," he said, running a hand through his hair. "Let's review the basics."

"Okay." Misao shrugged, bored already.

"Who is the father of economy?"

Misao thought for a minute before snapping her finger and pointing excitedly at Aoshi. "George Washington!"

Oh. Dear. God.

"No." Aoshi sighed. "George Washington was one of the American founding fathers. Adam Smith was the father of economy."

"Oh well, I knew it was one of those American guys." Misao said indignantly.

"Adam Smith was Scottish."

"Oh well, I knew it was one of those Western guys."

2 hours. For 2 hours he'd sat there, and in 2 hours she hadn't gotten a single question right.

He felt stupider for having listened to her answers.

He felt like ripping his hair out.

But mostly, he felt like strangling her.

"Who rewrote the Communist Manifesto?"

Misao scrunched up her face in concentration. He thought she might have an aneurysm.

"Vladimir Putin!" she cried suddenly.

Aoshi slumped over the table and buried his head in his arms.

"Shinomori?" she asked tentatively.

He wearily raised his head. "Why?" he asked.

"What?" Misao asked, genuinely confused.

"Why?" He asked again. "You're not stupid, so why? Why can't you just get this?"

She shrugged. "I dunno, I guess I just don't give a shit."

That pushed him over the edge.

"I'm done." he said, slamming his book shut. "I'm not wasting another minute with you."

He stood up and scooped up his books. "Let me know when you 'give a shit.'" he said sarcastically. "I'm sure you'll be able to find me, God knows you've been following me around enough these past few months. Bet you've got my whole routine figured out, eh Misao? I'm out of here." and with that, he left.

And Misao, for once, was speechless.

A/N: I'm sorry, I've been in a weird mood lately. You all probably hate me for ending my chapter so unhappily. This is supposed to be a crazy happy story. I'll fix it, somehow, in the next chapter. I honestly wasn't expecting it to end like that, but it fits my mood, so I'm keeping it. For now.

I'd like to take a minute to say HOLY CRAP, I wasn't expecting to get this many reviews. (99 as of this chapter) I never even thought that I'd get half as many for the entire story. And most of them are good reviews too! You guys make my day, I love you all to death! I wish I could be one of those cool people who actually responds to every single review, but I don't have time (or patience) for that. But I do love you all. You are my motivation, my kick in the ass, to actually get this story written. Because knowing that there are people out there that like my insane twisted brand of humor makes it all worth while. You're like the awesomest reviewer people ever!

Love. peace and all that good crap.

Til next time. (whenever that is.)

HAPPY FOOTBALL DAY!

The Super Bowl, the Un-Official American Holiday