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A million thanks to my beta's Jen and theotherbella for being amazing!!

Twilight= Still not mine!

I fell asleep while watching something on tv and thankfully got to sleep later than I had in awhile. I was woken up to a knock at my door.

"Breakfast is ready." I heard my father say through the door, instead of doing my usual not getting our of bed thing I got right up and I threw on a t-shirt to head down stairs.

I could smell the deliciousness of my mother's cooking and could hear her laughing loudly, no doubt over something my father said. They always laughed together and I wanted that with Bella. I wanted everything they had with my Bella.

I walked in the kitchen to see my mother plating her famous banana fosters French toast, scrambled eggs were already on the table next to a bowl of fruit salad and three cups of orange juice. My father was sitting in his regular seat, so I took my seat and gulped down my glass of juice. Then, I noticed my father just staring at me.

"Yes?" I asked him.

"Good afternoon, Edward." Carlisle said back to me.

"Good afternoon?" It might have come out more like a question than greeting but looking over at the clock on the stove confirmed that it was 12:30pm.

"What happened last night?" He asked me, I assumed referring to Bella and I.

"No idea?" I was playing it dumb because I didn't want to get into it.

"Bella left in near tears without eating cake. She loves cake. What happened?" Carlisle asked once again, I knew Bella was upset, but so was I. Did no one care about that?

"I tried to tell Bella how I felt about her and I don't think I really got it out before she shot me down." I summed it up as best as I could.

"And how do you feel?" He asked, clearly wanting more details than I was willing to give.

"About Bella?" I just wanted to eat not have a fucking father and son moment, but whatever. Carlisle nodded for me to continue with last night's story.

"I love her, Dad, always have." I said as sincerely as I could.

"I have thought so for years. You're not just figuring that out now are you, son?" He asked incredulously.

"Ummm, no." I wasn't appreciating that way he was talking to me. Was I fucking stupid? Bella had always been perfect. How could have never noticed that, dickhead?

"So what did you tell her last night, sweetie?" Esme said in a gentle voice, she must have seen that my father's line of questioning wasn't going so well.

"I don't know because I was stuttering like a fucking idiot. I couldn't form a single sentence that made any sense and Bella said she was 'over it' before I could really say anything." I spit the events of last night out quickly. I over emphasized the over it part and did my best Bella impersonation.

"So you never got to the feelings part?" Carlisle asked with a dumbfounded look across his face. Apparently I was stuttering again because I was pretty sure I just said that to them.

"Nope, and she just shut my ass down." I was sure I looked as defeated as I felt because fuck, it was just my parents and I didn't need to hide how I was feeling in front of them.

"Call me crazy, sweetie, but since you never got your feelings out why are you so sure she shut you down?" My sweet mother was attempting to make this make the situation a little less shitty by pretending I misread everything last night.

"No. Bella and I are like completely in sync, she knew what I was trying to say and she shut my down. You should have seen her face, she was so nervous about letting me down, not hurting my feelings; I could feel it from her." I didn't need to keep going over last nights rejection with them. It was done.

"Edward, I agree with your mother here." My father said because well he always fucking agreed with my mother. Once when I was younger my mother decided Carlisle would look so handsome with a crew cut and for some asinine reason my father did that shit. He looked like a complete tool for like two months before his hair grew back in. Needless to say no one was hitting on Dr. Hottie, as the nurses like to refer to my father, for awhile.

I think Carlisle could see the disbelief on my face because he continued to talk.

"No, I'm serious. This isn't like the time I wore that ridiculous Halloween costume to the formal hospital party. I have seen the way you two look at one another. It's love. It's more than friendship; it's much more than that, but years later it is scary to finally go from friendship to relationship. You need to be more direct with her." My father was done with his little lecture about Bella and I's friendship/ relationship, whatever the fuck it was. He looked over to my mother with a smile, like he had just cured a rare disease or some shit when really all he did was say what Esme had already said to me.

"Sweetie, he's right. You need to just say it. You're Bella and Edward; Edward and Bella. There is a reason everyone around here always says your names together because that's how it's always been: you and her. I think you need to tell her again but this time actually say it." Esme said it with conviction that I kind of believe it. My mother has never steered me wrong before and she knew Bella, not as good as me, but over the years they grew as close as mother and daughter. If my mother believed that she felt the same way I need to believe that shit to.

"Maybe you're right." I agreed with them mostly because I wanted to change the topic of conversation.

"So when do Alice and Jasper get in?" My father asked because he was always out of the loop.

"Ummm Friday I think? They're staying with Bella and me until the wedding, maybe a few more days, then coming here for the summer ." I answered.

"Have any exciting plans?" He asked, my father always sounded like an old man to me. The fucking wedding was next weekend, so of course we had plans.

"Yea, Bella planned a joint bachelor party for Rosalie and Emmett, and studying. We all have finals this week, well obviously not Alice and Jasper." My mother already knew all this and apparently doesn't pass it on anything to him.

"Sounds like fun. Any plans for the summer?" I know he was referring to an internship or summer job. It was my last summer before shit really kicked into high gear for me, no fucking way would I waste it in an office like last summer.

"Nothing too big, camping with Bella; if she is still game."

"Edward, you can't waste this summer doing nothing; you need to have something solid to put on your med school apps. We have talked about this."

"I know." He already seemed bored with the conversation because he wasn't getting the 'I know dad' response he was hoping for. Luckily Esme was able to get all of us talking for a long while before I realized that it was almost 2:30 and barely had enough to time to tell them I was leaving.

I ran up to my room, threw on a pair of jeans and a black shirt, covered my hair with a black hat and threw all my shit into my duffle bag. I didn't bother making the bed. I knew my mother was just going to stripped it and wash the sheets. I bounced back down stairs and my parents were waiting by the front door. My mother had a plastic tupperware container in her hands. She could never let Alice or I leave without something to bring home.

"I made your favorite chocolate chip cookies for you and Bella. I think you both could use them." Esme always knew that her cookies cheered my ass up. She was amazing like that.

"Thanks mom." I gave my father a hug because fuck, we had some kind of serious father/ son bonding at breakfast this morning, and it was a first. I leaned down giving Esme a kiss on the cheek and hug. She handed me the container and opened the front door for me.

I walked over to the Volvo, threw my shit in and waved goodbye before I drove off quickly. I hated being late and Bella hated it when people were late. I drove way too fast and got to Bella's house in ten minutes. It wasn't a record or anything but it was quick.

I was nervous as fuck to knock on that door; I wasn't looking forward to anything weird between us. If my parents were right then all that shit last night was just a misunderstanding and we would be fine. I certainly hoped so.

I knocked and waited for what felt like a million years when in reality was probably less than a minute. I was fucking nervous.

The door opened swiftly and Bella was standing shyly to the side to let me in. She gave a nervous smile but it looked more like she scared of me and my reaction to what happened last night. She was wearing a darker tan sweater thing that kind of wrapped around her, a black shirt underneath, a pair of jeans, black flip flops and her black sunglasses were on top of her head pushing the hair out of her face. She looked as beautiful, as usual. I looked right into her shy eyes and gave the best side smile I could muster, if my parents were right about this misunderstanding bullshit then I needed smooth shit out and quick.

"How was lunch?" My smile and question seem to instantly calm Bella down. She immediately relaxed her tensed up shoulders and smile back at me.

"It was good, really good. Yours?" She asked.

"Same. You ready to go, B?" I knew she had some homework to do when we got home, and she had an early class in the morning. I figured she would want to be home early.

"Ya, I'm ready, you?"

"All set, let's go."

"Dad, we're leaving." Bella yelled towards the living room. I could hear Charlie get off the couch and walk to the front door.

"Edward, how are you doing?" Charlie asked, more polite than friendly but I got a smile so his previous good mood wasn't completely gone.

"Not too bad, yourself?"

Bella gave her father Charlie a hug, which was strange. They almost never did the father/daughter affection thing. Maybe their lunch had something to do with it.

I stepped forward to give Charlie a handshake and a big smile "Nice seeing you, as always Charles." I know he just loves my smartass attitude, as he has mentioned it frequently.

He gave a small smile back "You don't change Edward, do ya?"

"Would that be any fun?" I joked.

"No, I guess not." Charlie gave my hand another squeeze and said, "Take care of our girl here."

"I always do, don't I?" We both laughed a little at the exchange, the same chat we have since the day we left Forks for Seattle.

"HaHaHa. Okay, enough, its getting old. I don't need to be taken care of." Bella said finger quoting the 'taken care of'. She hated when we did this, but it was our thing.

We turned to leave and I grabbed her bag. I never let her carry her bag, it was the least I could do since I worshipped her and all.

"Alright, kids be safe. Call when you get home to let me know you're safe." Charlie called after us.

"Will do dad, bye!" Bella said back and threw a small wave and smile back to him.

We walked out to my car. I opened her door for her and I threw her bag in the backseat.

"So, have a good weekend?" I asked even though we had this same talk last night through text.

"Well you tell me, we were together the entire time." She laughed because well it was true, minus the lunch with Charlie.

"You're right, you had a great time then." I figured leaving out the mini drama from last night would be the way to go. Bella shifted towards me in her seat. We weren't more than two minutes from the house.

"Well, we didn't do our thing. It feels kinda incomplete, doesn't it?" Bella asked me and I had to agree with her.

Every time we came home we went to 'our place'. A few months after Bella came to Forks we made an agreement to do something that the other person liked to do, no getting out of it. I just needed excuses to be with her and it was perfect. I usually choose to do things I knew she wouldn't like or never had done, while she always choose low keys things. I suppose we have been balancing each other from the beginning. Bella has always been so go with the flow and me not so much.

Bella brought me to the bookstore and bowling, I made her go to baseball games and a race track. I loved driving fast and she hated it.

When I made her go hiking one warm summer day, we can upon an open clearing in the woods. It was nice, open and you could see the sun. Bella was thrilled. She said "Well I think the torturous walk was worth it. It's magical." We spent the day laying in the sun, most of the time I was laying in the grass as she had her head on my lap. She was reading a book, Wuthering Heights, most likely. She brought that shit everywhere and I either slept, played with her hair or made her read out loud to me.

As we were walking back to the car that day five years ago, Bella declared the meadow 'our place' and I agreed, adding that we could bring no one else there. It was just for us. I said this because I want to ensure that no one else could share something like this with Bella, it would make me "more important" than anyone else. Only when it came to Bella did other people matter. With every other girl I was with I didn't care if they had been with other guys.

"Yea, it kinda does. Wanna go?" I asked, we weren't far from it and it was a quick walk into the woods.

"I do." She said happily.

Driving there was an automatic for me, taking no thought and we were there before either of us knew it. She was wearing flip flops and for Bella that meant death trap, so she changed into her the sneakers and we were off.

While walking we both stayed fairly quiet but it wasn't uncomfortable at all, thank god. I kept turning around to check on her and in twenty minutes we walked into the clearing.

"We're here." I unnecessarily announced, because it was more than obvious.

"It is still beautiful." She said out loud as she walked into the middle of the clearing. She turned and looked over to me. Her nervous face was back but she didn't break our stare down. I walked over to her, assuming we would talk about last night and I could say what I wanted to say. I sat down in the barely damp grass and assumed my usual meadow position, leaning back on my arms with my legs stretched out.

"B, I think maybe we should talk about last night?" It came our as more of a question but whatever it got my point across. We need to settle this shit and now.

"No, net yet." She said quickly while sitting down assuming her usual meadow position, laying down on her back with her head on my thigh, looking up at me. I was about to object to her refusal but she spoke first.

"Please?" She almost begged and I could deny her nothing. Whatever happened between us last night clearly wasn't a little misunderstanding. My girl looked hurt and sad and I knew I was sad and my heart hurt. No, this wasn't just a small misunderstanding.

Bella and I sat there silently for who knows how long, the sun still shining.

She was looking everywhere but at me, almost afraid to make eye contact.

"Hey, can we talk about something?" she asked me almost whispering uneasily. She slowly raised her eyes meeting mine.

"Sure, what's up?" I asked. I hated when she got nervous with me. I only wanted her completely comfortable, relaxed and loved around me, as I was with her.

"Well, today, with Charlie, we were talking and I was telling him some stuff and well I was thinking-" She stopped talking abruptly so I looked over to her and she was biting her lip of course. She was scared that much I could see; the suspense was killing me. What could be making her feel this antsy? And what could have Bella and Charlie talked about that that pertained to me?

"What Bella; you're killing me here" I said, and it was true. She was.

"You know, it can wait. Let's just enjoy the quiet and nice weather" She said. Was she kidding me? I fucking hated when she did that.

"Well, when you're ready, I guess." I huffed out.

We sat quietly for awhile, her head on my lap but no more eye contact. I loved just being with her.

"Hey, B?" I looked over at her. She turned up to look up at me. Today it was just her; no makeup or anything just her natural beauty showing through. I could have just stared at her for hours but that would have been weird, I think.

"What?"

"You ever come here with anyone besides me?" Why the fuck did I just blurt that out? Because I did once, but the thought of her bringing someone to our place would have hurt more than a little.

"No, it's our place. Why would I?" She asked, sounding a little offended that I would even think such a thing.

"No reason, just thinking that's all" I replied hoping she wouldn't return the question and knowing that she definitely would.

"Have you?" Her face showed her angst, she already knew the answer.

"Well, yea once but it was like last summer, I think."

"Edward, you brought someone else here? To our place? who?" She questioned me and that look was definitely hurt. I hated that I made her feel like that. Why the fuck did I ask her this? What the fuck was wrong with me?

"I ummm- well it was, it was Tanya." I finally stuttered out, knowing how much Bella hated Tanya.

"Tanya? Are you serious? You're kidding me, right?" She stood up quickly and I followed her. Her face was getting red. I knew this could only mean one thing. She was gonna flip.

"Oh, I can't believe you, Edward. Tanya 'I'm a fucking whore' Denali ? You had the nerve to bring her here? Our special place? You never let anyone come with us; not even Alice or Jasper! But you let FUCKING TANYA COME HERE!" She was screaming, inches from my face now. Her face was getting redder with every word.

"Bella, I wasn't thinking, it was stupid. I won't do it again." I said hoping this would calm her down. I never thought she would get this mad but she is always surprising me with shit.

She was waking towards me with her hands flailing about "Oh, you're right you won't be bringing anyone else here because you're banned, got it?" She poked up her tiny little index finger into my chest and it actually hurt.

But I had to laugh a little because she couldn't ban me, I found this shit. "You can't ban me B, it's public property." She furrowed her eyebrows a little more at me and starting to poke me again. It was hurting a little more each time.

"Oh no. You're banned and if I find out you come back here, I will… I will… I have no idea what I will do but it will be bad, and you will be sorry." She yelled at me, no traces of joking anywhere in her little rant.

I grabbed her little finger because that shit was starting to really starting to fucking hurt. "You know you're really cute when you're mad. I should piss you off more often." I laughed a little, trying to diffuse the fucked up situation I caused. I wasn't prepared for the Bella freak out that was coming.

She full on slapped me across the face, open palm and everything. It stung like a bitch. "You Edward Cullen, are a dick! Apparently this goes along with whatever the hell you wanted to tell me last night." She screamed impossibly louder and stormed away from me, making her way back towards the car. My usually no violent Bella has hit me twice in one week, that some some kind of crazy ass record.

I should have lied, I knew this but I usually tried to be as honest as I could be with her. I followed behind her, trying to get her attention asking her to slow down, to talk to me with no avail. She stomped herself all the way back to the car in complete silence with the exception of a few mumbled "dickheads" and "asshole" that I'm pretty sure I wasn't supposed to hear or maybe I was. While trying to keep up with her surprisingly quick pace I was racking my brain to figure out how this shit was connected to last night. Evidently, my parents were correct Bella and I had a serious misunderstanding if she thought my fuck up had anything to do with what I wanted to say last night.

We finally reached the car in less than fifteen minutes, we were hauling ass. My girl didn't trip once and that meant Bella pissed equals coordination. I wouldn't mention that to her now; maybe later though.

I pushed the unlock button on my key chain and Bella opened the passenger side backseat door. Was she serious with the fucking backseat? This was complete bullshit. Maybe I deserved it, but I really didn't think so. We drove home in almost complete silence. I attempted to apologize a few times but was swiftly told to "Shut the fuck up." Swears and silence meant she was more than just a little upset, it meant I fucked up bad. She slept for most of the ride and when we finally got back home she grabbed her bag and jetted upstairs without a word, not holding the elevator. She locked herself in her room for the night.

The three plus hours of driving in silence only gave me time to think about how I had fucked up, knowing that no matter what I said Bella wouldn't be getting over this anytime soon. It was a motherfucking year ago and the only reason we went there was because fucking Emmett mentioned my and Bella's 'favorite spot'. Tanya was technically my girlfriend and all kinds of jealous about my friendship with Bella. She made a serious deal about going there, and I took her there to just shut her the fuck up. Tanya thought it was 'nothing special, it just the woods and who wants to be in the woods?' We left after like five minutes. She was pissed because she shoes got dirty. It was a complete waste of time and I ended it with her on the way back to Seattle. Shit, the only reason I brought her home was because she answered my fucking phone when Esme called and Esme being Esme invited her for the weekend with me. My mother, who likes everyone didn't even like Tanya but was still nice to her. I, on the other hand, was a complete dick to her the entire weekend and texted Bella nonstop. I could see why Tanya was so jealous of Bella. Any chance I got, I was putting Bella first and made no secret of that.

Even knowing how much I fucked up, I was still trying to figure out why this had Bella so angry. In reality, we were not together and never had been. She has never really given me any signs that she wanted to be with me. I was probably just trying to make what I did less shitty by justifying it to myself. If we were truly just friends, should Bella be this angry with me? I don't know if I was just over analyzing everything but this weekend was just different. Her freak out in our meadow, her actually getting drunk and us kissing. None of this was our normal; everything was different to me but what the hell do I know?

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