Things Could Be Different

Disclaimer: I don't own Gilmore Girls.

A/N- Hey guys, sorry it's been a while but I was away on holiday. Hopefully I will have all my stories updated soon, and I am working on something new. Please Review.

Chapter Seven: Crying Games

A week had passed since the party and the town was adjusting to Jess' presence, though they still felt he was the town hoodlum, they no longer constantly shot him dirty looks, and told him he wasn't welcome. Most of the residents had settled down once they realised that Rory was fine with him being here, with the exception of Taylor who still thought only of getting rid of Jess.

It was a Monday and Jess was walking aimlessly round the town, book in hand trying to figure out if he should go and see Rory, they'd been spending more time together lately, but there was something in her demeanour which worried Jess. She wasn't as relaxed as she had been, it was as if she was suddenly remembering all the reasons she'd been mad at him, she was starting to push him away. His decision was made for him when he saw her walking down towards the bridge, in a split decision he followed her, dropping down next to her on the bridge. She didn't look up, keeping her gaze looking over the smooth surface of the water.

'Hey.' He said quietly.

'Hi…' Rory said fiddling with the edge of her book.

'Are you ok?' Jess asked.

'Uh yeah.' She paused, still keeping her gaze away from his, which she could feel was on her face. 'I um…have a date tonight.'

The words shocked Jess, and he felt as if he'd been punched, he tried hard not to show it, but he wasn't hiding his emotions well.

'Really?…Who with?' Jess gritted his teeth.

'Just a guy I met at Yale, his names Ryan, he's pre-med.' Rory replied, hugging her book to her chest.

'Rory…' Jess didn't know what to say.

'Did you think we could just start over?' Rory asked, a flash of irritation in her eyes.

'No. I had hoped that we could try and work things out though, I know I hurt you Rory but I'm better now, you can trust me now. I don't want to loose you.' Jess said turning her face so she met his eyes.

'You can't loose me Jess, you don't have me. You've already lost me. Don't you see I can't just forget, it hurt too much and I don't want to feel like that ever again.' Rory shook her head.

'Rory…we should be together, you know it as well as I do, please just give us a chance. I won't hurt you again.' Jess said earnestly.

'I wish I could believe that, but I just can't do it anymore. This…us, it just wouldn't work, not again.' Rory said.

'Don't! Please don't say no, don't give up. Don't say no just because you're scared, please Rory we could be better, we can make this work.' Jess said, he hadn't planned on asking her to be with him again, not so soon anyway, but hearing she had a date with some other guy was tearing him apart.

'No! Jess I can't.' Rory said jumping to her feet and running off the bridge, not stopping until she reached her house, falling to the floor in tears. She sobbed for an hour solid, not sure what was making her feel so bad, it had been her choice to move on from Jess, but part of her knew that she'd never get over Jess. She dried her eyes and prepared half-heartedly for her date, by the time her mum got home, she was all ready and looking much better even if she didn't feel it.

'Hey hun, what time's Ryan picking you up?' Lorelai asked as Rory walked into the lounge, with a simple blue skirt and blue top on.

'In about five minutes.' Rory said quietly, sitting down next to her mum. 'I told Jess I had a date.'

Lorelai cast aside her magazine and focused all her attention on Rory.

'Ooh how'd he take it?'

'Not well, he started saying that we belonged together and that we should give us another try, he wants to be with me.' Rory said, her voice cracking a little towards the end of her sentence.

'And you said?'

'That I couldn't…mum I just can't go backwards, I need to move on and get over Jess.' Rory said, 'I don't want to be with him.' Even to herself the words sounded forced and untrue, her mum gave her a strange look.

'You really don't want to be with him?' Lorelai questioned. Rory looked away nervously, hearing a knock at the door she got up expecting her date, and sighing in relief that she didn't have to answer her mum's question. It was however Ryan who stood at the door, instead it was Luke.

'I just thought you should know…uh Jess left. He um asked me to give you this letter, I wasn't sure if I should but he asked so here I am.' Luke said uncomfortably, Rory nodded numbly, taking the envelope offered, she backed away from the door, leaving Luke and Lorelai alone, she went into her bedroom giving her mum instructions to tell Ryan she was ill when he arrived. Sinking down onto her bed she opened the letter carefully and read the contents.

Dear Rory,

I'm sorry. After all I said, I promised I wouldn't hurt you again and I promised I wouldn't leave again, here I am running away. It seems to be what I'm best at. I meant what I said Rory, I want to be with you, but it's clear that's not what you want, I messed things up too badly last time. I can't stick around and watch you with some other guy. So you said you want to move on, get over me. So I'm giving you the chance, I'm out of the picture, I'll come back for the wedding but after that you won't see me again. I wish we could have worked things out…

I Love You, I'm sorry I never told you that in person, but there it is seeming so simple written down, just three little words. Yet knowing you don't feel the same way is more than I can handle. I'm sorry.

Yours always,

Jess.

She didn't even realise she'd started crying until a tear hit the page, making the ink smudge a little. Dropping the letter to her lap she curled up on the floor sobbing her heart out. Lorelai came into the room and sat on the floor soothing Rory.

'I really messed this up, I didn't want to be with him because I was afraid it would end up hurting me, but not being with him is hurting me just as much. I've really lost him now.' Rory cried.

*

Jess drove fast away from Stars Hollow, dashing away the tears that were welling up, he wouldn't be that weak to let a girl effect him so much. It was amazing the ability they had to hurt each other. He pulled onto another road, not realising his destination until he arrived in the crowded New York Streets. The lights of the shops and signs shining brightly against the dark night sky.

*

A/N- Please don't hate me for this, sorry it's so short. Please review.