Chapter 7: Siege Part 2

When we last left our heroes, the majority of them were defending the entrance of the villagers' mining cavern from the Borg. In an attempt to prove herself to her family, Aphrodite had taken Autolycus, Joxer, and the three crewmembers from SeaQuest to retrieve a powerful weapon she believed should stop the Borg threat. As the men were bringing the weapon out of its chamber, the place began to fall down all around them. Autolycus and Tony managed to escape being buried alive, but even as the dirt closed over Tim, Joxer and Dagwood, Aphrodite used her power to try save them with some success (sort of) before collapsing into unconsciousness. Autolycus and Tony were left to try figure out whom the one person was that Aphrodite had been able to save.

Aphrodite herself groaned in misery. Her head throbbed with a pounding sensation as if she had eaten too much over ripe ambrosia and her body felt like she had been hit by one of Zeus' personal thunderbolts. She felt like a sack of old clothing being carried over someone's shoulder. It wasn't until her head cleared a little later that she realized that she actually was being carried on someone's shoulder. "What…?" she asked groggily

"Hey, I think she's coming around!" Aphrodite recognized the voice of Tony Piccolo though she didn't acknowledge it.

"No kidding," sneered Autolycus. "Hey, big guy. Put her down so we can see if she has some answers about what happened back there."

Now that she was lying down she forced herself to open an eye, then after a moment, both. She reached a hand to her head to make sure that it was still attached. "What… happened?"

"Oh no, you don't!" Tony yelled despite the painful flinching Aphrodite displayed. "You're the one with the magic fingers! You tell US what happened!"

She shook her head as she sat up. "What are you talking about?" she whimpered. A shadow passed over her and she looked up. "What?"

"I think you mean who," pointed out Autolycus.

"Who?" she asked in confusion. Taking a better look at the man in front of her, she started to understand. "Oh no," she moaned.

"Oh yes!" snapped Tony. "Now what are you going to do about it?"

"I-I-I-" She had no answer for him, so she turned instead to the figure standing in front of her "Are you okay?" asked the goddess.

The figure before her considered for a moment and then just nodded.

"Um, I'm a little behind things here." She thought about standing up and decided against it. "Are you-I mean, who all is in there? I mean-"

"You got all three of them in one," answered Autolycus.

"Wha-what?"

The thief shook his head in disbelief as he explained what he knew was true. "Joxer, Tim and Dagwood. When you were bringing them out of that collapsing hole, you put them all together. Merged them somehow into one body."

"That's not what I was trying to do!" she defended. "I told you being near that place would cause problems with my powers! That's why none of the gods will go into the place. I was trying to save them, not-"

"We know that," responded Autolycus gently.

"But you still did it," Tony snapped at her, "so undo it already!"

"Are they all right up here?" She tapped her head with one of her fingers.

"As far as we can figure… yes." The green clothed man bit his lip. "But he or they, as it were, do have some trouble with the singular/plural pronouns. He's kinda keeping quiet until he can work that out a little in his head-their head! Ah, nuts! It's got me wanting to keep my mouth shut, too."

Aphrodite put her hands over her eyes and just lay there on the hard ground. A gentle hand on her shoulder caused her to take a peek. The hand had Dagwood's splotchy coloring, though it was larger and lighter. She wasn't sure who the eyes had belonged to, but the face and hair was definitely Joxer and Tim's. The amalgamized being put on an awkward smile as if trying to comfort her. "I'm sorry," she said.

"It's okay. We-I-um…" The being shook its head in mild frustration. "It's okay," it finally decided on and then took a step away.

"It's not okay!" shouted Tony. "You did this! You fix it! Right now!"

Aphrodite sighed as all eyes were on her. "I wish I could," she said in defeat.

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The Main Cavern Entrance

The battle to keep the Borg out of the mineshafts where the homeless villagers and farmers were hiding was not going well. Slowly but surely the defenders were being pushed back.

"Ephiny!"

Ephiny looked up from the defeated drone at her feet to see who had called to her.

Gabrielle took cover next to a large stalagmite where Ephiny joined her. "Our people are falling faster and faster. We have to evacuate. Get ready to set everything in motion."

"My queen, something has happened."

Gabrielle didn't even turn to her. She just stared out at the siege before her looking for people she knew among those fighting and those fallen. "What is it?"

"Some of Draco's men. They attacked us in order to escape the battle and fled further down into the mine."

"What?"

"We haven't been able to spare anyone to go after them."

"Does Draco know about this?" asked Gabrielle.

"Do I know about what?" called out a deep voice.

Gabrielle spun around to find Draco grinning at her just a few feet away. "Are you following me?"

Draco's grin faltered. "Well… you see, losing a leader in battle can be very detrimental. So, I thought I'd just-"

"-That you'd just be my bodyguard." Gabrielle shook her head. She didn't have time for this former warlord following her around like a love-sick, puppy dog. Especially right now. "And what about a leader for your men?"

"My men?" Confused at the subject change, Draco looked out where most of the fighting was taking place. "They seem to be doing all right. Pericles has his group are over there covering a group of your archers. Tougun seems to be fighting side by side with that shape-changing creature. Aeral and his group-."

"But you don't see all of them, do you," responded Gabrielle. "And do you know why that is?"

Draco shifted uneasily where he was kneeling. He figured traveling with Xena would have given her a more general understanding of the battlefield. "Um, it is a battle, Gabrielle. Sometimes people die in battle. Actually, it is rather expected."

"Not that, you dummy!" She almost swung her staff at him. "Some of your men ran away and attacked some Amazons in order to escape."

Draco's eyes darkened. "They know better than that. They know what would happen if I ever caught them. Are you sure it was my men and not some of those farmers or miners?"

Ephiny nodded, "Oh yes. Definitely yours. Seven men attacked us, but only four got away." She rolled over a corpse at her feet to show a tattooed face.

Draco hit his fist into the cavern wall. "They'll die for this! Do you have any idea where they were headed?"

"Draco!" Seeing she had his attention, Gabrielle continued. "We need you here now. Evidently your men need you with them, too, or some of them wouldn't have done something so rash."

"I-"

Gabrielle held up a hand to stop him. She chose to move onto the more important matter. "We need to leave this area. We can't hold it much longer. I need you and your men to help cover people as we retreat. Think you can organize them enough for that?"

He hesitated, but nodded in the end.

"Good. Then hurry. We don't have much time."

Ephiny watched as Draco made his way over to where a couple of his reforming cutthroats were taking on any drone that came near him. She shook her head.

"What?" asked Gabrielle.

Ephiny chuckled. "Xena's starting to rub off on you."

Gabrielle grinned at the compliment. "Hey, there's a number of drones going down that corridor. Where does that lead?"

"Um, I think it's one of the routes to the kitchen, but we had the miners cave in a section of it to make it unusable."

"How big of a section was caved in?"

Ephiny thought a moment. "About five feet, maybe more."

Gabrielle bit her lip. "I need to send a message."

"To whom?"

"To the only person who might know if the Borg can get through five feet of a blocked passage way. The former drone, what's-her-name, Seven of Nine."

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A Back Entrance to the Cavern Mines

"Finally! Daylight! C'mon, let's leave this deathtrap!"

Irikles stepped over one of the few guards that had been guarding the entrance. "Hey, Aeschylus, think we could take a few of these guards along? One or two of them could fetch a fair price on the slave market."

Aeschylus, the uncontested leader of four men considered for a moment. "No. They'd just slow us down. What we need is to get as far from this place and Draco in particular if we are going to survive at all."

Jacob tested the workmanship of one of the fallen men's spears. He decided it was good enough to take along with him. "I'm surprised Pericles didn't come with us."

Aeschylus sneered. "Ever since he met that farmer's daughter near that fishing village, all he's wanted to do was finish his time with Draco and go back for her. She actually said she would wait for him." The murderer laughed. "And funnier still, he actually believed her."

A fourth man came out into the light. "Love can be such a pretty trap, though those who get caught up in it don't seem to mind so much."

Irikles laughed. "Philoctetes, you're such a romantic."

Aeschylus stormed forward. "Come, fools, we need to make tracks."

Irikles held up a hand and motioned for silence. "Someone's coming up the trail. They'll come around the bend in a minute."

Aeschylus looked around. There was nowhere to hide or ambush from their position and the only way down from this barren side of the mountain was the path before them. "I guess we'll just have to meet them head on."

"Maybe they'll have some valuables or weapons we can take," commented Philoctetes.

"Or some food," replied Irikles licking his lips.

What came around the corner was something none of them had expected. It was human in shape but was over seven feet tall and very muscular. The most unusual thing about the person was the spotchy-colored patches on his skin.

Aeschylus hesitated at the size of the person in front of them. Still, it was four against one. And he was blocking their escape route. "Take him!"

The fight, if that's what it could be called, didn't last long. The bodies of the four deserters lay thrown around the tunnel entrance.

"Whoa, big guy! Met some unfriendlys, huh?" Tony surveyed the prone figures while he absently checked his sprained arm. "Glad I didn't come around that corner first."

The 'big guy' sat down on a boulder and sulked. "They… just attacked. Didn't ask anything. Tony, am I-are we so terrible looking-that people want to kill me on sight?"

"Trust me," commented a weary Aphrodite as she came around the corner, "you're beautiful." The female goddess moved close to him and took his large hand in hers. "Even in this confused state you find yourself in, you are one of the most beautiful and sweetest persons on this world. And I should know, I am the goddess of love and beauty after all."

The composite man blushed and became mute.

"Now what?" asked Autolycus. The thief ached everywhere and was exhausted. But, even he knew that this was not the time for rest and relaxation.

"Puh-please… help."

Everyone turned to one of the fallen guards near the entrance. Tony reached him first and was surprised at seeing such an elderly man on guard duty. "Here, take a drink," he replied as he offered the man a goatskin of water. He held the skin carefully as the other man managed to take a few gulps. The other three quickly gathered round.

"What are you doing out here, old-timer?" asked Autolycus. "This area isn't usually guarded."

The old man coughed briefly, then answered. "I wanted… to do something. They wouldn't let an old man like me fight… on the front lines like I volunteered for, but stuck me… back here to watch one of the only… exits we left unblocked." He coughed again. "How did you… know of its existence? It's been a secret… the miners have jealously guarded."

Autolycus shrugged. "Well, I once used it as a shortcut to get… get to… ah… a secret fishing pond. Yeah, you wouldn't believe the size of these fish. Beautiful specimens." He looked around to see if anyone one was buying into his story.

Tony shook his head. "Say, mister, you said something about a fight. Do you mean with the Borg?"

The old man nodded his head. "They attacked… the front entrance this morning. The Amazons, the miners, and those strange ones… they have been holding them at the main entrance… but I haven't heard anything since being stationed here." The old man coughed and shuddered. "So… cold."

"The Borg?" The being that was made from Dagwood, Joxer and Tim stood from where he had been kneeling. "At the cavern entrance. Fighting Amazons. Gabrielle will be there. She'll be in danger!"

Tony eased the man down gently to the ground before checking on his friend. Unfortunately, by that time all he saw was a form quickly disappearing down the dark corridors of the mine. "What are you-Hey, wait! Come back! Dagwood! Tim!" After a moment's hesitation he added, "JOXER!"

"You're too late, kid. Your friend has taken off." Autolycus swiped both ends of his mustache with his finger. "Evidently, one of the things the three of them could agree on is Gabrielle."

"Shut up," responded Tony. "Let's go after him."

"What about your new friend?" asked Autolycus.

Tony looked down at the old man at his feet. While he had been calling after his friend the old man had expired. "He's already dead. More will be if we don't get down there soon."

"Well, let's hope we're still in time to save somebody." The love goddess put a protective hand of the bag, which the contents thereof the men had risked their lives to recover. "I'd hate to think I went to all this trouble for nothing."

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Inside the Brokious Mine

"Are you sure about this?" Riker lowered his head to miss a small stalactite hanging from the ceiling.

"You're the one who insisted on coming along," answered Kaleipus. The old centaur had allowed the human to ride on his back because he didn't want to wait for him hobbling along on his bad leg, yet desired the ability he had to communicate through his comm-badge with his comrades over long distances.

"Couldn't we have sent someone to check it out for us?"

Kaleipus's tail swished in agitation. "Send who? All the men and women who can fight are already facing the Borg. Besides, Gabrielle wants to know as soon as possible if we have a dilemma here. And so do I." They let the subject drop.

Riker forced himself to remain as relaxed and still as possible. He knew that if he tried to guide the centaur he was riding the same way he did a horse, he would be thrown immediately. He had been warned that centaurs didn't like being treated like horses. "Are we there yet?"

"No. I thought that was obvious even to you."

Uh oh, he doesn't like backseat drivers, thought Riker as he suppressed a grin. He refrained from talking, hoping that the old centaur would cool down a little. Instead of talking, he nodded to a few people who looked over as they passed. The people, mostly women and children, just stared at them. A few waved or nodded back. Even though the people wanted to stop and ask how the battle was fairing, they knew the two did not have time to tell them anything just now. "Was that the kitchen we just passed?" Riker's stomach growled.

"Yes, which means this side tunnel should be-"

A drone stepped out of the side tunnel and fired point blank at Kaleipus. The old centaur managed to rear up in the confined space of the tunnel and lash out with the most lethal weapon he had available-his front hooves.

Riker flew backwards off of Kaleipus and managed to brace himself with his hands to keep from impacting hard with the wall. He rolled immediately to the side despite the pain in his leg to keep from getting stepped on by the heavy centaur. Seeking to get his bearings while his right hand reached for his phaser, the first thing he noticed was Kaleipus falling down in front of him. The drone that had shot him was already dead on the ground after Kaleipus had kicked it.

"Kaleipus?" When no response came, Riker quickly pulled out a tricorder and scanned the fallen centaur. "Oh no."

It was while Riker was checking his reading to see if he had made a mistake when more drones came around the side tunnel.

"Commander Riker!" called out a voice from behind him.

Will Riker reacted instantly. He drew his phaser and fired again and again. Hands came from behind him to pull him to his feet, but he ignored it as he fired on the enemy in front of him. Then they adapted.

Riker looked at his weapon. "The phase modulator! Where is it?"

"It appears to have fallen off. Probably when you fell." The Doctor shifted his grip on the commander. "That being the case, I think it prudent that we leave immediately. I don't suppose you could stand on your own?"

A shot was fired from behind them and hit one of the drones, causing it to collapse. Both turned to see who their savior was.

Lwaxana stood there in one of the side tunnels already aiming at another Borg drone. "Hurry up and get him in here already! I haven't got all night!"

The Doctor lifted Riker by his armpits and dragged him toward their unlikely rescuer. Riker bit his lip at the pain his throbbing leg was causing him. He focused his thoughts on using his good leg to help push himself to safety. Even though he knew anything could happen at this point, he was sure this was going to be the end of Will Riker.

A long arm reached out, grabbed Riker, and pulled him into the room past Lwaxana before he or the Doctor could say or do anything. It was only as he was being gently seated along a wall that he was able to learn who had brought him to safety.

"Mr. Homn?"

Lwaxana'a servant nodded graciously.

"Uh, thank you."

Mr. Homn nodded again before taking up a weapon and calmly walking over to the door to help Lwaxana with holding back the Borg.

Looking around, Riker noticed he was in the room they had dubbed the 'theater'. Young children looked up at him in wonder and fear.

"Commander Riker?"

Riker smiled, happy to see the familiar faces even in these circumstances. "Naomi. Solan. Xenan. What brings you here?"

Naomi ignored Riker's attempt at humor. "Are we going to be okay?" she asked as she hugged the centaur toddler to comfort him as well as herself.

Riker sighed. "Of course, we are. Watch. I'm calling for help right now." He tapped his comm-badge. "Riker to Seven."

"Seven here." A number of the children watching ducked under their covers at the sound of the voice that seemed to come out of nowhere.

"We have a problem," explained Riker. "The Borg have gained access to the inside tunnels. Right now, they have us pinned down in the 'theatre' with the children. We need help very soon."

"Understood, Commander."

"There," he said to Naomi. "You trust Seven to get us out of this, right?" The young girl nodded shyly. "Good." Riker looked over at the Doctor who was passing out candy among the children to pacify them. "Now we just have to weather this storm until help arrives."

"Commander," Solan interrupted. "Wasn't Kaleipus with you?"

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The Main Cavern Entrance

"Xena!"

Xena kicked out savagely, knocking two of her opponents into the cavern wall and into unconsciousness. After a quick glance around, she made a quick dash and a leap to cover the distance between her and Gabrielle. "What is it? I need to cover our retreat."

"Trouble! The Borg have penetrated into the inner tunnels. Seven says the children are trapped!"

In spite of the recent rigorous fighting she had been doing, Xena's face paled. Without a word, she raced down to the far tunnel her forces had been falling back towards. She ran forward pushing past the wounded and retreating soldiers. Seven of Nine and Ephiny followed with the same intensity.

Gabrielle watched Xena go, silently wishing her well. "Eponin! We have two minutes to clear out of here!"

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On a Hill outside the Cavern Entrance

Murdock sat carefully behind a tree while he scoped out the line of drones entering the cavern entrance. "The weight will throw your aim off so you will have to compensate," explained the pilot.

One of the Amazons scowled. "We have shot with a bow in our hands since before we could walk. Besides, you are asking us to hit the side of a mountain. Do you think we could possibly miss?"

Murdock chuckled at that. "My apologizes." He looked at his wristwatch to check the time. He stopped himself, but not in time to keep the sharp pain in his broken arm from coursing up and down his arm. "Ready when you are," he gasped.

As he watched, the Amazons came into the clearing and formed a line facing the mountain entrance. As one, the seven Amazons pulled the pins of the grenades attached to the tips of their arrows, aimed at the rocks above the main entrance to the caverns and fired.

The resulting explosion kicked up more dust than Murdock had expected. He had to wait for a minute before he could tell that the main entrance had completely collapsed on itself. The surviving drones were milling around the debris assessing the situation and making evaluations on what to do.

"Okay, ladies. Time to vamoose."

"Should we not attack them again while they are confused?" asked one of the women.

Murdock began to do his best Humphrey Bogart impression. "Sorry, doll. But we've got orders. Besides, some of those high-tech zombies that survived that blast are going to be hightailing it up here to take us out. So let's scram."

One of the younger amazons had a bemused-smile on her face as she regarded the behavior of the strange man in which their Regent had shown interest. "We could ambush them."

"Not this time. The drones coming up here will be looking for us. And with the type of equipment them got, they can spot us hiding in a tree or even behind a tree. Shoot, they could shoot the tree down with us in it. And then where would we be? Not to mention what it would do to the tree."

A couple of the Amazons looked nervous. Running was not to their liking, but they had seen the effectiveness of the long-range light-casting weapons of the Borg. The Amazons would not have a chance. And then there was the manner in which the Borg recruited…

"We are ready to go," declared one of the women.

Murdock just nodded. What else could he or they do? Silently, he worried about his friends and Ephiny.

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Inside the Mountain

Autolycus ran down the tunnel ahead of the others to see if he could catch up to the composite being made up of Tim, Joxer and Dagwood. Being an excellent thief, he had studied the tunnels on previous excursions until he knew them like the back of his-

"Uff," he managed to cry out before he landed on the ground. He stood up and brushed himself off while looking accusingly at the rock he had tripped over.

Hearing a commotion ahead, the thief proceeded up the tunnel carefully so that he could see what was going on before he committed himself to anything. Peeking around a bend, he could see some of those who claimed to be from a future timeline blocking an oncoming barrage of drones at a tunnel intersection.

"B.A.! Hurry it up!" snapped Colonel Smith. The Colonel leaned up against the side of the tunnel trying to gain as much cover as possible while he fired at the Borg. He and B.A. had already worn out the energy cells of the weapons provided by their allies from Starfleet. Not knowing how to replace them, or even if they could be replaced, they had resorted to their regular weapons. While the straight shots were being deflected off the force shields of the Borg, it was the ricochet shots, the shots that were not on target, that were actually getting through. Hannibal grinned as he fired off another volley into the wall, causing a drone to fall onto his dead predecessor. "Cave walls make ricocheting easy," chuckled the colonel. "Hope they don't 'adapt' to that, too. I like being able to stop them for a change."

Autolycus glanced back at the big black man. He stood over some strange looking device, pulling on a string while muttering words in a hushed tone. Finally, B.A. hollered at the colonel. "We wouldn't need this hunk of junk if that Fool hadn't taken all the hand grenades!"

"I told him to take 'em," countered Smith. "He had an aerial tactical advantage, remember?"

B.A. just grumbled in reply and took another pull on the cord in frustration. This time his efforts weren't in vain. The old chainsaw that B.A. had been working on roared to life. "All right! Bout time somethin' works around-"

B.A., taking a hit to the side from a Borg weapon, crashed to the floor while dropping the chainsaw.

"Nuts!" yelled Hannibal Smith. Risking a look to see how bad his friend was hurt, he spotted Autolycus. "You! Get in here! We need you now!"

"Aw, great," muttered Autolycus. With reluctance, he made his way toward them. "What now? I don't have any weapons."

"Pick up the chainsaw!"

"The what?"

The colonel turned and pointed. "That thing on the floor. Pick it up and bring it here." Hannibal quickly let off another volley at the Borg in frustration.

"Now what?" asked Autolycus as held the idling tool and ducked into a closer tunnel to keep from getting shot from the Borg.

"Don't hold it by that end! You'll get your hand cut off. Hold it like a sword."

"Uh. Not very sharp for a sword. Kinda heavy, too." His finger found the trigger and the next few seconds was again filled with the sounds of the chainsaw's motor. Then he saw Smith waving at him he let go of the trigger. "Sorry. Rather noisy, isn't it?"

"Just use it to cut that support beam for that tunnel's entrance."

"Are you crazy? I'd have to get-" The colonel was already laying down a line of suppressing fire. "Why me?" he muttered to no one in particular. Edging closer, he took a deep breath, and then quickly swung at the support beam with the chainsaw.

"Not like that! It's not an ax! You'll break it!"

"Like I know what I'm doing here?" snarked Autolycus pointedly.

Hannibal sighed. "Put the blade edge to the wood, then pull the noisy trigger while gently pushing it into the wood."

"Uh, okay." Reaching out with the chainsaw, he did just as he was told. He was surprised at how easily the loud tool cut into the hard wood beams. He was almost enjoying himself. It actually felt natural. Almost like he had handled one before. If only this thing wasn't so noisy, he thought to himself, it could have been really useful on some jobs.

When he was almost through the beam, he heard a loud crack over the noise he was making. "Uh oh." He hurried back even as Hannibal kept the drones while they were while that particular tunnel entrance collapsed.

Autolycus leaned against the tunnel wall and slowly slid down. "I really gotta stop hanging around Xena and Hercules. It just takes too much out of me." Carefully, he set down the sputtering chainsaw while he rested. Off to the side, Smith was checking on B.A. Baracus. "He okay?"

"Stunned only," answered the colonel. "The Borg didn't want to damage the goods. His pride will be hurt more than anything else." Smith quickly reached for his weapon as two figures came down another tunnel.

"Auto, did you find him?" asked Tony, who was out of breath.

Autolycus shook his head. "Had a run in with the Borg," he explained.

"Where?" asked Aphrodite, who was suddenly very excited.

"Over there. Had to bury the entrance to stop 'em, but I was up for the task." He patted the chainsaw next to him. "It's easy if you use the right instrument."

"You … you…"

"Ah, overwhelmed by an act to true heroism. I understand. Words may fail you, but-"

"You idiot!" she exclaimed.

"Pardon?"

"I could have ended this whole mess with the weapon we got from Athena's underground arsenal. All I needed was one drone and this would all be over. Or did you forget that?"

"Uh… oh yeah," he answered sheepishly.

"C'mon," snapped Aphrodite. "We have to find ourselves a drone."

"And Tim and Dagwood," added Tony. "And Joxer."

Aphrodite sighed. "We either have to find a way to separate those three or come up with a new name for them." Shouldering her bag with her weapon in it, she took off down one of the tunnels followed by Autolycus and Tony. Colonel Smith stayed behind to guard his unconscious friend.

Author's note

- The chainsaw is as close as I will get to making reference to Bruce Campbell's Evil Dead and Army of Darkness movies. For those of you who do not know, Bruce Campbell plays Autolycus on the Hercules and Xena TV shows. In the movies I've mentioned, he plays Ash, a man 'armed' with a chainsaw fighting the evil dead which he chops up with the chainsaw.)

Characters in order of appearance or mentioned:

Aphrodite (Alexandra Tydings) – from the TV series Hercules: The Legendary Journeys (1996-1999), Xena: Warrior Princess (1997-2001)

Autolycus (Bruce Campbell) – from the TV series Hercules: The Legendary Journeys (1995-1999), Xena: Warrior Princess (1996-1999)

Joxer (Ted Raimi) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1996-2001), Hercules: The Legendary Journeys (1997)

Piccolo, Tony (Michael DeLuise) – from the TV series SeaQuest DSV (1994-1996)

Ephiny (Danielle Cormack) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1995-2001)

Gabrielle (Renee O'Connor) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1995-2001)

Draco (Jay Laga'aia) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1995-2000)

Xena (Lucy Lawless) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1995-2001), Hercules: The Legendary Journeys (1995-1998)

Seven of Nine / Hansen, Annika (Jeri Ryan) – Star Trek: Voyager (1997-2001)

Riker, Cdr. William (Jonathan Frakes) – from the TV series Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987-1994)

Kaleipus (Paul Gittins) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1996-1999)

Doctor, The 4th (Tom Baker) – from the TV series Doctor Who (1974-1981)

Troi, Ambassador Lwaxana (Majel Barrett) – from the TV series Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987-1994)

Homn, Mr. (Carel Struycken) – from the TV series Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987-1992)

Wildman, Naomi (Scarlett Pomers) – from the TV series Star Trek: Voyager (1998-2001)

Solan (David Taylor) – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1996-1998)

Xenan – from the TV series Xena: Warrior Princess (1996-2001)

Murdock, Capt. H.M. 'Howling Mad' (Dwight Schultz) – from the TV series The A-Team (1983-1987)

Bogart, Humphry – Actor (mentioned only)

Baracus, Sgt. Bosco 'B.A.' (Mr. T) – from the TV series The A-Team (1983-1987)

Smith, Col. John 'Hannibal' (George Peppard) – from the TV series The A-Team (1983-1987)