#61) Even though I am Yuuri's secret admirer, I am not allowed to send anonymously texts. I should know he can't handle that much attention
Yuuri scrolls dully through his phone when suddenly a text message appeared from an anonymous number. The Japanese skater frowned then opened it.
"Hey, hottie."
Yuuri turns bright red then starts to ponder who could have send it. Viktor maybe? No way, he would send it with his own phone rather than with an anonymous number. A prank maybe? Then another message appeared.
"In case you're wondering, I'm your secret admirer."
Secret admirer? He, Yuuri Katsuki has a secret admirer? Yuuri seriously starts to doubt someone would be interested in him like that, then suddenly a third message appeared.
"You always look so freaking adorable without your glasses."
"And that little clueless frown is cute too."
Wait, what? Little clueless frown? Panic started to build up inside Yuuri when he realized the anonymous person saw him. Anxiously, Yuuri looked around the rink, but he only saw Phichit practicing his routine. Text after text appeared on his screen until poor Yuuri couldn't take the 'flirty' harassment anymore and ran away, screaming in fear. Phichit stopped skating, watched Yuuri leave then simply shrugged and resumed his figure skate routine.
Hours later, Celestino found Yuuri hiding in one of the ice rink's broom closets, looking as pale as a sheet and his eyes widened in fear. The phone clutched in his hand tightly, and every time a new text appeared, the screen lighted up making poor Yuuri's face looking even more pale. Celestino rolled his eyes and snatched the phone from Yuuri's frozen fingers then read all the new messages.
"Why you run away?"
"Do not fear me, I love you."
"When you ran away, I have to admit your butt looks yummy from this angle."
"Wait, where did you go to?"
"Yuuri?"
"This is your secret admirer, looking for you."
"Wait, you want to play hide and seek? I love that game."
"Yuuri, I've been looking for you for hours now and still didn't find you. Where did you run off to?"
"Yuuri? I'm starting to miss you, Yuuri?"
"I also start to miss that sexy face of yours when you don't wear your glasses."
"And your cute little clueless frown."
As Celestino read all the previous message, one new message appeared.
"Hey Yuuri, Chris said your 'glutes' felt really soft and tight. How does he know that, unless…wait, did Chris touch your 'glutes?" When I found you, would you allow me…
Celestino did not take the time to read the entire message and dialled Viktor's number then yelled, soon the boy answered his phone; "That's it, Nikiforov! Leave my skater alone, you pervert!"
"Whaaaat?" Viktor gasped dramatically. "I'm only sixteen, you know that, right?"
"MY SKATER IS TWELVE!"
"So? Yakov is ninety years old and Lilia is seventy years old. (no, they are not)
Yuuri, slowly waking up and finally finding his voice; "Wait, it was just Viktor who send me those messages and not a creepy stalker?"
At that moment, Celestino realized calling Viktor was a bad idea, because Yuuri now turned into a giddy fan-boy and beamed like the sun.
#62) I am not allowed to convince Yuuri nodding burns calories. I should know it backfires on me
"Seriously Viktor, yesterday you ate two pork cutlet bowls but your body still looks perfect. I eat one bowl and I'm like ten pounds heavier. How do you do that?"
Viktor blushes; "You really think I have a perfect body?"
"Yes, I do. I mean, no offence but with your low stamina you definitely need a secret to keep your body in perfect shape."
Viktor blushes some more. "Aw, thank you, Yuuri. Actually, I do have a secret, but I will tell you if you promise to keep it a secret."
"Okay."
"You know how people ramble at me about all kind of things and I simply nod at everything they say?"
Yuuri thinks for a moment. "Ehm, yes, now you mention it, you do nod a lot."
"Well, that's my secret. I continuously nod my head in response to things other skaters tell me. It technically burns calories."
Yuuri looks slightly doubtfully. "Seriously?"
"Well, you said it yourself. You said I nod a lot and you said my body is in perfect shape, so there's your answer."
"Whoa! I definitely should try it out."
"Sure, but remember…
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."
A few hours later, Chris walks towards Yuuri.
"Hey there, Yuuri. Can I ask you for a favor?" Yuuri simply nodded in response as he kept reading the messages on his phone. Viktor didn't really say he had to listen to everything what was said, as long as he just kept nodding, he would burn calories. Chris is surprised. "Really?" Yuuri nods again. Chris, still surprised, smiles; "Oh, okay. You see, there is this awesome party tonight and I need someone to accompany me. Are you interested?" Yuuri, listening absently, just nods. "Thanks man. One other thing, would it be okay for you to stay with me all night and make a person extremely jealous?" Yuuri nods again. "Awesome! I'll pick you up at seven, okay?" Yuuri nodded again and Chris left, knowing he would have the best date ever with Yuuri. Viktor would be so jealous. Yuuri however, felt very proud too. He nodded like 4 times already and he felt the calories burning.
After seven, Chris and Yuuri entered the party and Viktor trotted towards them noticing Chris's hands on Yuuri's butt.
"Chris, what are you doing?!"
Chris grinned; "I asked Yuuri if I could touch his butt and kiss him whenever I felt like, and he nodded. Awesome, right?"
"This is all your fault, Viktor!" Yuuri growled before Viktor could react. Viktor gasped.
"How is this my fault?!"
"You said nodding burns calories!"
"Still, it would be a good thing to actually listen to what people ask before you nod, because shaking your head burns as much calories as nodding," Viktor exclaimed. "I tried to tell you that, but you wouldn't listen."
Yuuri sends the silver haired skater an icy stare. "You did not try to tell me that, Viktor!"
"Yes I was. I said, and remember...but you just ran off without waiting for me to finish my sentence."
Yuuri's glare becomes even more icy.
"Anyway, now I know this I'll make sure I won't ask anything else for the entire night," Chris grinned and pulled Yuuri closer. "I don't want him to shake his head to the things I ask and have him run off. He's mine tonight, Viktor. Now if you'll excuse us, we are going to search for a quiet spot and make out."
And with that, Chris starts walking straight past Viktor and across the dance floor, dragging Yuuri along. Viktor's bottom lip started to tremble. He really should have put a little more effort into making Yuuri listen instead of letting him just walk off.
63) No matter how ambitious I am, I am not allowed to steal other peoples' belongings and hide/bury them in the woods
Viktor strokes his chin then says to himself as he stares at the pile of belongings in front of him; "Hmm, I already came this far. And it would be a lot of trouble to just return them again."
Twenty minutes later…
"Vitya!" Yakov roared as he charged into the room, his eyes filled with rage.
Viktor smiles sweetly; "Yes Yakov?"
"Mr Plisetski just called and told me he can't find his ancient swords!"
Viktor looks nonchalantly. "And you tell me this, why?"
Yakov crosses his arms. "Don't tell me you forgot what happened last time. You threw it in the pond claiming it wanted freedom! I think this is a lot like that!"
"Not really," Viktor snorted. "This time it just wasn't the swords."
Before Yakov could open his mouth to respond, shouts are heard from all over the ice rink.
"Where is my cat's collar!"
"My beautiful, skin-tight blue skating uniform! I can't find it anywhere!"
"Has anyone seen my glasses?!"
An even angrier Yakov turns back at Viktor, only to discover he was gone. Viktor escaped out the window and ran as fast as his feet could carry him back to the woods to try find the spot where he had buried all the items. Sadly, he couldn't remember where it was.
#64) I am not allowed to swap clothes with Yuuri
Viktor was brilliant. And no one would notice the difference, that's for sure. Happily, the young skater entered the ice rink wearing Yuuri's dark blue glitter vest, grinning from ear to ear. His long, silky hair tied in a ponytail.
"Nikiforov?" Celestino asked, watching Viktor skate across the ice then turned to face him.
"You must mistaken me with someone else, dear sir," Viktor said, sticking his nose up in the air. "My name is Yuuri (Katsudon) Katsuki. I'm extremely hot and I have lots and lots of…"
"Nikiforov!"
"…stamina." Cue wide smirk. Sadly enough, he was met with glares of rage.
"Is that the skating costume I asked Yuuri to wear at the short program tonight?"
Viktor strokes his chin as he thinks. "Maybe…"
Suddenly a wild roar comes from inside the changing rooms. "VIKTOR, GIVE BACK MY COTUME, RIGHT NOW!"
"Well?" Celestino asked when Viktor didn't make an attempt to return the clothes. "Return the costume, right now. I don't want my skater to skate naked tonight."
Viktor smirks; "Oh, don't worry, he doesn't need to. I left my Eros costume on the bench for him to wear tonight. I know he loves that one."
Satisfied, Viktor skates away and starts to make a few perfect pirouettes on the ice, beaming happily at Yuuri, who's coming from the changing rooms wearing Viktor's Eros costume and the biggest blush imaginable.
#65) No matter how much I want to give them a nice little push towards the OtaYuri relationship, I am not allowed to hide Yurio's clothes and have him lend one of Otabek's leather jackets.
Making sure Yurio wouldn't see him, Viktor grinned to himself when he watched the boy search the dressing room for his best jacket. The poor kid had been looking for it for minutes now and he started to look really angry for the fact he's running late for his very first practice with Otabek as his rink mate. Yup, Yakov decided to become Otabek's coach too, but of course he would make sure there is a lot of space between the two boys when they practice together. No way he wanted Otabek's bad reputation rub off on Yurio. Suddenly, without noticing Viktor, Otabek entered the dressing room.
"Are you coming or what?"
Yurio spins on his heels to face Otabek then starts to blush awkwardly. "Yeah, I just need my jacket and I can't find it anywhere."
"Then skate without it."
"I need it, alright? It keeps me warm." Yurio turned back to face the bench and started to thoroughly search for his jacket again. In his sports bag. Between the other skaters' clothes. Under the bench. It was nowhere to be found.
While Yurio was desperately searching for his favorite jacket, Otabek watched him momentarily before chewing on the inside of his mouth, thoughtfully. Then he rolled his eyes and took his own jacket off.
"Here, borrow mine," Otabek said curtly then extended his hand with the jacket to hand it to Yurio. Yurio eyed the jacket momentarily then blushed madly.
"Seriously? You allow me to borrow your favorite, leather jacket?"
Otabek shrugs shortly. "Sure, why not?"
Yurio starts to blush even more then takes the jacket and puts it on. It's a little too big for him, but it's incredibly warm. The blond wraps himself in it a bit more, engulfing himself in Otabek's warmth, then follows his favorite skater towards the ice rink, with a radiant blush on his cheeks.
#66) Nor am I allowed to try see if my #1 fan looks cute in my Russian track suit
Viktor was 'welcomed' by an angry glare from his coach as he entered the ice rink. The reason; Yurio refusing to leave Otabek's side during practice, and Yakov knew that Viktor somehow had something to do with it and the leather jacket Yurio was wearing.
"Oh, come on. Even you have to admit Yurio is a much more pleasant person to work with right now," Viktor commented with the most sweetest smile. Viktor met stares of pure rage. "No?"
"I only agreed to coach that brat if you made sure he wouldn't come too close to Yurochka! And instead, you hide Yurochka's jacket and have Otabek lend his! If that kid's bad reputation rubs off on Yurochka, and Mr. Plisetski tries to kick my butt for it, I'll tell him to kick yours instead!"
Viktor simply smiles at Yakov as if he's just a cute little puppy instead of an infuriated Pitbull, then zones out completely as his own mind starts to ponder how Yuuri would look like in his track suit. There is only one way to find out, right?
"Coach Yakov, I know you need me right now to blow off some steam, but there is a sudden tiny experiment I have to do," Viktor smiled, cutting Yakov's angry words off, abruptly. Then, before Yakov had the chance to respond, Viktor dashed away leaving an utterly stunned coach behind.
Later…
"Minako, I promise I won't stay long!" Viktor cried gleefully as he charged down the hotel room door, startling Minako who was about grab a drink from the min-bar. Viktor halted his stride the spun around, looking for Yuuri. "Where is little piglet?"
Minako rolls her eyes. "In the bathroom, why?"
"Perfect!" Viktor dashed cheerfully inside Yuuri's bedroom then returned with the biggest, dreamy look in history and his sports bag filled with Yuuri's clothes. Then noticing Minako's confused look; "Just wait before asking questions, okay?"
It took a while but finally Yuuri comes strolling outside his bedroom.
"Minako, all my clothes disappeared for some reason, and all I could find was this track suit that looks identical-Viktor, what are you doing here?" Yuuri gasped surprised when he noticed the skater's presence.
Viktor, with big, round teary eyes; "Yuuri! You look so freaking adorable in my track suit. All that is missing is my jacket." Before Yuuri knew what happened, Viktor hoisted him in his Russian sports jacket. "Aw, you look gorgeous!" Viktor looked at Minako to share a proud look with her, but he met looks of anger. "What?"
"I promised his mom, my longest and best friend, to protect her son while we are here, but so far you managed to get him drunk a couple of time, nearly marked him with a tattoo, and dragged him to a rock concert! No way I will have you change his entire wardrobe and turn him into a second version of yourself!" Minako screamed, chasing Viktor out the door with a broom.
Yuuri was blushing too hard to anything else than engulf himself in the smell of Viktor that lingered in the jacket's fibres.
#67) I am not allowed to read Yuuri's diary out loud in the changing room
"Hiya guys! Tonight I wanna share something that is not entirely mine but belongs to a very close friend of mine. He's too shy to share it with you himself." Viktor smiled at the small crowd that was gathered in the changing room, opened the diary he was holding, and finally cleared his throat.
Dear Diary
11-29-2000, my 7th birthday
Mari, my sister, gave me a pair of figure skates today and I instantly showed them to my best friend, and rink mate, Yuuko. While I was posing for her with my new skates, Takeshi skated across the ice and bumped me of my feet. As if that wasn't already painful enough, he started bullying me. Yuuko tried to defend me, but all Takeshi did was laughing.
A little while later, the three of us sat in the changing room and Yuuko told me about her idol who happened to be the best figure skater in the whole world. She was blocking my view so I couldn't really see what was happening on TV, but soon she turned around and stepped aside, I saw the most beautiful figure skater skate gracefully his routine in a competition. His long, silver hair was tied in a ponytail, but it still…"
"VIKTOR, GIVE ME BACK MY DIARY!" Yuuri bellowed, charging inside the changing room.
"See Otabek, that's the reason why I would protect my diary with a self-detonating lock. When breaking it, KABOOM!" Yurio grinned when he watched Viktor run for his life.
#68) I am not allowed to duel with Minami and claim, whoever wins, dates Yuuri
"GET BACK HERE, KIP-NUGGET ON LEGS!" an all too familiar voice bellowed. Yuuri turned around alarmed then saw Viktor sprint after Minami with one of Mr Plisetski's swords. Minami clutched one in his hand as he ran, too afraid to use it on Viktor. Another blur swooped by, (Yakov) ordering the boys to stand still. Then all three of them disappeared out of sight, leaving Yuuri behind with his jaws dropped.
Realizing there was a chance things might turn ugly, Yuuri woke from his gaped state and rushed into the direction the skaters and the angry coach disappeared into. As he closed in on them, his ears filled with the clashing sounds of swords. Horrified, Yuuri spun around the corner of the hallway and was stupefied by what was in front of him.
Viktor and Minami are exchanging blows, their swords clashing, sparks flying in all directions. Yakov pressed with his back against the wall, cowering away when the sword fighting skaters came dangerously close.
"Viktor, Minami! What are you two doing?!" Yuuri choked out in pure fear.
Both skaters pause briefly, then Minami wailed while tears welled from his eyes; "Viktor forces me to duel with him and the winner wins a date with you."
"And I'm about to win!" Viktor hollered, smelling his victory already as he heaved his sword dangerously.
Yakov then proceeds to pummel Viktor. The sight wasn't pretty.
#69) I am not allowed to hide myself in a clothing rack because I think I can scare the crap out of Yurio. I should know that kids nerves are as strong as steel
Yurio browsed through a clothing rack for a new shirt when suddenly…
"PICK ME!" Viktor cried merrily when his face popped into view. Sadly enough he met Yurio's VERY angry look. Yurio grabbed a fist full of Viktor's long hair and dragged him from under the clothing rack. "NO! Not my hair! It's already becoming so thin!" Viktor wailed in pain.
"I DON'T CARE!" Yurio bellowed infuriated. "THIS IS YOUR PUNISHMENT FOR TRYING TO SCARE THE CRAP OUT OF ME, YOU OLD MAN!"
"I'm not old, I'm sixteen," Viktor whimpered in pain, trying to untangle his hair from Yurio's strong grip.
It was finally Otabek who was able to calm Yurio down by letting him smell his leather jacket.
#70) I am not allowed to be sarcastic
Viktor skates across the ice, preparing himself for a jump but slips and falls with a thud on the ice.
"Ha, what happened? You fell?" Yurio laughed when he entered the rink and saw Viktor trying to get back on his feet.
"No, I attacked the floor," Viktor replied.
Yurio frowns. "Backwards?"
"Yeah, I'm freaking talented."
Sure, even the best skaters fall, but not that Viktor will ever admit that. Especially not to a mean little six year old with a strong love for cats.
Which one was your favorite? I think mine is #62 xD
Anyway, I also wanted to let you know that if you have an idea, you can either drop them in the review section or pm them to me. If I like them/get inspired by them, I will try to use it. Of course you will be credited for the idea :D