Gwaihir: Due to the lack of normalcy in the previous disclaimers, I have brought a very special guest to do the disclaimer this chapter! Drum roll, please!

Drums//roll down the hill and bump intoGhost of Tolkien/

Ghost of Tolkien: OW!

Gwaihir//sigh/ It's…. TINUVIEL'S POT PLANT!

Pot plant: …………..

Tin: Come on, speak up!

Ala: Um, Tin……

Tin: Yes?

Ala: You do know that pot plants can't talk, don't you?

Tin: Of course my darling ickle pot plant can talk! It's just… um… shy, that's all!

Ala: Well, if you say so /rolls eyes/ but I still think someone else should do it.

Gwaihir: I wondered why it never answered when I asked it to marry me…. /blushes/

Ariel and Caeli: AWWW! Gwaihir and pot plant, sitting in a tree, K I S S I N G!

Ghost of Tolkien: Stop destroying my Windlord's reputation! Fine, I own most of it. Thankfully, I don't own Ariel and Caeli.

Tin: MY POT PLANT!

Chapter 7

Ariel POV

After me, Caeli, Legolas, Elrohir, and Elladan decided to dye Erestor blue, I excused myself and went back to my nice comfy bed, which I had been unfairly roused from by a pointy eared elf who had been the victim of one of my early morning moods (translate as: I hit him in the face. Caeli always said I was grumpy in the mornings. I always preferred to say that I was very defensive of my right to sleep while half-awake.)

"AAAAARRRGGHHHHH!"

I sat up in bed two hours later, woken by a scream. I heard footsteps running and looked round in fright, wondering who had screamed and what was happening. Then my door burst open and two male beings with sharp pointy swords rushed in.

Please God please don't let them kill me or kidnap me or torture me!

I dived underneath the duvet and curled up like a hedgehog. One of the people put their hand on my shoulder. I recoiled and punched them in the nose.

"Owwww!"

That voice sounds familiar…. who've I just punched?

I sat up and stared into the faces of Elrond and Legolas. The latter having a hand over his nose.

Uh oh. Why, why, why do I always have to embarrass myself in front of him?

"Oh my god I am so sorry! That's the second time I've hit you in the face today, it's nothing personal I promise and I'm sorry! I didn't realise it was you I just woke up when someone screamed then you two came in and I just saw the swords and didn't recognise you I am so sorry I really didn't mean it!" I babbled, mentally hitting myself – make that mentally running myself over with an articulated lorry – and stared at the two of them. Both elves had concerned looks on their faces. Well, Elrond did, and what I could see of Legolas' face made him look concerned.

Oh yayness, now they definitely think I'm mad. The looks on their faces SO say 'let's take her off to a nice friendly psychiatrist.

"Are you alright Ariel? We heard you scream and thought that you might be in danger," inquired Elrond.

"It was me that screamed? Okaay I did not know that… I thought it was somebody else, it sounded really….unearthly." The scream had actually sounded sort of like a fell beast, but I managed not to blurt that one out.

"Yes, you screamed. Did you say you were woken up by it? Were you dreaming anything particularly worrying?" Elrond seemed very interested in my dreams.

"Actually, I never have nice dreams, that one was just worse than usual. I guess that I just screamed in my sleep or something." I could literally see both elves' ears perk up at this, and I began to regret sharing that minor detail of my usual sleep pattern.

"You never have good dreams? Are your nightmares generally about anything in particular?" This time it was Legolas inquiring about my dreams in an overly interested tone.

"Erm yes they are actually, the people and settings in them always change, but I'm always being chased by evil people who want to kill me, which sounds really childish but it's quite scary when it's actually happening. And they often have people that you would know but I don't although I know their story, and they're always the good people. But I didn't dream anything like that last night."

Am I imagining things or did Elrond go momentarily bug-eyed? Nah, must have been imagining it. They're really stupid dreams actually.

"Interesting… very interesting…" mused Legolas.

Cap'n Jack Sparrow!

"What did you dream about that caused you to scream so loudly?" asked Elrond, with his infuriating blank i-am-an-Elf-Lord-and-thou-shalt-not-know-what-I-think expression.

"I just had a dream about having a massive argument with Erestor in the Hall of Fire, and he was calling me and Caeli spies AGAIN and then saying some total crap which you don't want to listen to cause it was very repetitive and long winded. And then I totally embarrassed myself by crying which is so the stupidest thing to do in an argument and I screamed at him then ran out then I woke up."

What the hell is so funny about that? It was not a fun dream to have!

I glared at the two elves, whose grins quickly subsided into looks of sympathy.

They better be sympathetic because I've had a bad dream and not because I look like I've just been run over by a reindeer.

"Ariel, you would probably prefer to hear this from Caeli, but that dream was a memory of yesterday evening." Elrond told me.

"You mean… I really stood there and screamed at Erestor in front of everyone? So now everyone hates me for shouting at your chief advisor who's probably three thousand years older than me? That's absolutely fantastic, my life just gets better and better." I sighed and imagined Erestor riding a zebra and losing control of it, only to fall off of it into a huge vat of pasta sauce.

Hehehehe

"Well, yes, you and Erestor did have a rather interesting argument, but I do not think you need to worry about being disliked by the eyewitnesses of the event" Elrond reassured me.

Hmm, yes Elrond, I'm sure they all absolutely love the fact that the spy screamed at the advisor of a ring-bearer. I bet they're all out selling 'WE LOVE ARIEL' tshirts. I'm so sure.

"Hm." I raised my eyebrows slightly. "Well, it's probably really late now so I better get up and get dressed."

As in, bugger off. If you really want to talk to me, wait outside the door.

Neither Elrond nor Legolas showed any intention of moving towards the door and going through it.

Duh, THAT MEANS YOU TWO!

"Um, that was kind of the tactful version of: I need to get changed so please don't sit there and watch because that is never going to happen!" I said, exasperated at the idiocy of immortal beings.

I guess it really is true about your brain cells beginning to die when you're 25. These two don't seem to have many left.

"There is a screen over there, you can change behind that." Legolas said.

Argh bloody elves! Is two minutes of privacy alone in my room so much to ask?

I rolled my eyes, grabbed my shorts and a tank top, and disappeared behind the evil screen to change. Thirty seconds later, I emerged and sat down cross leggedin front of the mirror, and proceeded to brush my hair, ignoring the Elf Lord and the prince who were sitting on the end of MY bed. I glanced round at them and saw that an expression of boredom was etched across said prince's face, and on Elrond's face one of THE eyebrows was raised.

"Well, guys, having to watch me do my hair and make up is what you get when you insist in waiting in here while I get ready to face the world, which, incidentally, hates me." I finished brushing my hair and proceeded to do my make up.

"Have you finished yet? And what was the powder you put on your face?" asked Legolas, when I stood up. I grinned evilly.

"It was blusher, and oh no I haven't finished yet, I need to paint my nails first," I said. A 'whattttt?' expression manifested itself over their faces, and I proceeded to explain to the two elves how nail polish worked. Of course, I decided that the best way to explain would be to demonstrate…. Suffice to say that once I was finished with them, they both had very rosy cheeks. Elrond was modelling bright pink nail polish, and Legolas' nails demonstrated exactly how bad orange nail polish looked on elves.

Muahahahahahahahaha! You know, I really don't think that pink suits Elrond very much, he looks very girly with the nails and the blush and the long hair. Hehehe. And Legolas looks absolutely foul in orange! Kind of like a cross between a stalk of celery and a pumpkin.

After I had made up Elrond and Legolas, the three of us left my room, and wandered vaguely in the direction of… somewhere. The corridors were very pretty, and the memory of our plans to dye Erestor blue made the world seem so much brighter… positively shiny, in fact!

I realised that for me and Legolas to successfully be Elladan and Caeli's alibi, we really needed to escape Elrond. Legolas, evidently, had completely forgotten about this, and so I tried to subtly escape from Elrond.

"You know, I'm actually quite hungry, shall we go to breakfast?" I figured that somewhere along the way, we could lose him and provide an alibi.

"Ariel, it will be time for lunch in an hour. You slept in late."

Time to think up a new plan, then.

I thought hard, then gave up and figured that we were going to get caught anyway, so it didn't really matter whether or not I managed to create an alibi. I know, that wasn't the nicest thing I'd ever done, but I was hungry and much more interested in food than revenge.

In the end, Elrond went off on his own anyway, and I proceeded to remind Legolas that we needed an alibi for them and that he needed to think of one due to his superior brain power.

"Ariel, Erestor was dyed blue an hour ago."

OK, that explains why he didn't try and get away from Elrond.

Joy of joys, Erestor stormed up to us right then, dyed a beautiful starlight-blue colour, and proceeded to shout at me for being generally evil. I actually felt sort of bad, because that dye could take a while to come off, and I figured we were even.

"Erestor, please could we discuss this somewhere more private than right next to the hall of fire?" I could totally see the mistrust written all over his face, but he grudgingly agreed after a glare from Legolas. So the three of us traipsed off to a garden.

"OK Erestor, I know you don't like me, and after the dye I can understand why. But I don't want to hate you and I don't want you to hate me so please can we just cut the arguing, pretend we've never met or spoken, and start again? Personally I think we're even now, you were really rude and unfair to me and Caeli, so you became blue. So can we please stop fighting. And I'm sorry for you being blue if you're sorry for what you've said to me, but if you're not sorry, I'm not either." I said, watching his face carefully. Being an elf, and probably not a bad guy normally, he agreed to 'start anew' with me, although I noticed he didn't mention anything about peace with Caeli.

Oh well, he'll come round. Even if it does take a talking bowl of pink and purple spaghetti to make him wake up. OK, if he saw that he'd probably faint. Don't think they have pasta in Middle-earth.

Caeli POV

I sighed contentedly, submerged in the warm fragrant water. Yup, fragrant! The smell of my rose and cinnamon shower gel wafted pleasantly through the air. Everything was perfect…almost. It was just this weird feeling I got that it wasn't quite privet. I mean it was of course I was on my own but…

Ok, I'm not explaining myself very well, you see Rivendell is a very open kind of place. There are very few rooms that are closed in by four walls and a ceiling. Of course they bedrooms were completely closed in but they had this free feeling to them. Lovely to just relax in and sleep in but not when you're having a bath. Ever not been able to shut the door when you're washing? Even if you know there's no one at home it still feels weird. Well I felt kinda like that.

Weird feeling aside, the bath was lovely. The water was just the right temperature and lovely and soft and I felt totally clean and relaxed. I sunk into a dream like warm trance.

Then was rudely awoken by someone knocking on my door. What was it with today and people disturbing me?

"Just a second," I called and jumped reluctantly out of my bath and grabbed the soft white, fluffy towel (why does everything in Rivendell just have to be so nice? It gets annoying!). I wrapped I rubbed the towel over my hair quickly, just enough to stop it dripping and wrapped the towel around me.

I glanced in the mirror, my hair was a mess of random wet waves. I hunted in my bag for a comb. Come on, you've got to be there somewhere dearest brush don't let me down now in my hour of need…

"Are you ok?" asked the elf outside my door. I gave up on the brush.

"Yes, yes, come in," I said deciding that all fit elves around had seen me in a state by now anyway for one reason or another an it was pointless trying to make out I was beautiful. I closed by bag and turned around to see Glorfindel.

"I didn't mean to disturb your bath lady, I apologise." he said at once seeing me in a towel. Was it me or has this elf done nothing but apologise to me since I arrived? Then again thinking of the events of the day he probably wasn't here to apologise.

"That's ok, I was finishing anyway," I lied, anything to stop him apologising! "Could you err, close the door though please though its kinda cold,"

"Yes of course, sorry," he said and closed the door. Couldn't he just quit apologising?

He turned to face me again. My heart sank, I was in big trouble. He had shown me nothing but kindness since I arrived and here and now he was to lock me in the dungeons or some such. Was he really going to lock me in the dungeons? No, of course not I was being stupid. Then I remembered how they had locked up the dwarves in the hobbit. Ok, that last sentence sounded weird, I mean how the elves had locked up the dwarves in Mirkwood in the book 'The Hobbit'.

"Does my presence really have such negative associations?" Glorfindel asked. Oh dear, could he mind read, was he like Galadriel? Somehow I felt this was the wrong time to quiz him on any random powers of telepathy he might have.

But if he's telepathic knows that I'm thinking he's really hot! Ok, stop thinking the golden-haired-blue- eyed- elf- in-front-of-you-who-can-defeat-balrogs is hot!

"May I ask why I have earned myself such a reputation?" he asked.

"I just assume that you're coming in here to throw me in the dungeons," I replied truthfully. Glorfindel seemed taken aback.

"Now that is a very negative idea to have of me, why would I wish to do that?" he answered serenely.

"Well I take it this isn't a social call-" I started but he interrupted me.

"Where did you get that idea?" he asked. Why did he have to be so difficult, couldn't he just say what he wanted to say and leave?

"Well, I can tell, you know how you can tell!" I said slightly exasperated, this was an elf who could read my mind why was he asking me how I could tell he wasn't come here talk. "Its like your tone of voice, your facial expression, your eyes, the way you didn't come in and say 'hey Caeli, how are you doing?', that sort of thing." I paused. "You're not on a social visit are you?"

"Sadly no," he admitted. "I am here on behalf of Erestor," looked at me for a second "is there anything you would like to tell me?"

"Concerning Erestor and the colour blue perhaps?" I asked mimicking Glorfindel's composed voice and expression, trying desperately not to laugh.

"Yes," he answered simply.

"No," I answered just as simply and went to fetch another towel for my dripping hair.

"Do you deny the incident happened then?" he questioned, watching me. I rubbed my hair in the towel and then threw it on my bed. This was really starting to annoy me, I wanted to get changed and I was tired of adjusting my towel to keep it from slipping. I went and stood in front of Glorfindel.

"Glorfindel, I wouldn't lie to you," I said looking him directly in the eyes, "Since you ask yes there was an incident involving blue dye and Erestor this morning however if he wishes to discuss it he can come here himself. I don't want to argue with you. But," I said walking over to a pile of clothes and grabbing them, "I do want to change, so if you don't mind," I gestured in the direction of the door.

"There is a screen behind you, you can change behind that," he stated. Oh my god, did this guy enjoy winding me up? Did we not have a discussion on teen mortals? I looked at him. He sat down on my bed, universal body language for 'I'm not going anywhere'.

"Why do you have to be so DIFFICULT!" I shouted the last word but immediately regretted it. He looked hurt, evidently people didn't usually shout at him here. I sighed and when behind the screen to change.

"I just need to talk to you," he said almost pleadingly (if great elf lords plead).

"Ok, ok I'm sorry," I said pulling my top over my head and pulling on some jeans. I emerged from the screen.

"Now that wasn't so hard was it?" he asked. I rolled my eyes as he went to sit on a chair and I sat on my bed opposite him.

"What else have you got on your list of things to talk to me about, apart from Erestor?" I asked knowing the answer.

"On my list, only Erestor," he sighed.

"I've already.." I begun but he cut me off.

"Please hear me out." I he paused to make sure he had my full attention. Erestor doesn't wish to speak with you because he feels he cannot converse with you in a civilised manner," he explained.

"Oh, so that's what we're doing here conversing?" I asked scornfully.

"No, we're talking," Glorfindel sighed.

"Why can't he talk normally to me then?" I demanded.

"Because he feels he cannot talk with a traitor." said Glorfindel

"A traitor? I thought we were just spies? Now we're traitors?" I exclaimed, how could I have got worse simply by being here?

"Not both of you, you." said Glorfindel solemnly. I just stared at him and suddenly felt very vulnerable, up till now everything that had happened had happened to both of us, I didn't understand.

"Me?" I asked in barely whisper.

"He believes you are of the Haradrim," Glorfindel said quickly as if wishing to get it out in the open.

"What…?" I asked in disbelief "Why?"

Glorfindel just looked at me sadly. Then it clicked.

"My skin…" I murmured, "because I have slightly tanned skin…" Glorfindel nodded quickly and then averting his eyes from mine said:

"He wishes to have you killed for the treachery."

You could have heard a pin drop.

Silence.

I looked at Glorfindel's face for some sign he was joking. There were no such signs. Eventually he brought his eyes to at mine.

My eyes spontaneously filled with tears and I started shaking. This was sooo not happening. I mean first off it was sooo Mary Sue, second off…was it so Mary Sue? Oh my god he wants to have me killed…KILLED. I could feel my heart beat getting faster and faster until I was sure Glorfindel could hear it as well.

As soon as the teas begun to roll down my face Glorfindel went immediately over to me, his face changed into a picture of pity. He knelt in front of me and took my hands.

"Caeli, I won't let it happen, you must believe me." he pleaded. This just made me cry more for some reason. He hugged me to try and comfort me. As you probably guessed it didn't actually work. I cried even more.

"You don't believe I'm from the Haradrim do you?" I asked shakily. He moved back a little so that he could look into my eyes.

"If you say you are not, then I will believe you," he said fixing his ocean blue eyes onto mine.

"I'm not," I sobbed, I didn't want to come here and die! That wasn't supposed to be the story, I still hadn't seen a hobbit! "I just, just come from a different world," I said hugging him again for reassurance, he just felt all-knowing and for someone who is nothing-knowing that's a very reassuring thing.

"Caeli, I give you my word no harm will come to you while I am here, it may be just that he was particularly annoyed this morning because of what happened."

"But it's just stupid!" I sniffed, trying to come to my senses., "I mean kill me? As in properly kill me dead?" I asked, I mean surely that sort of thing just didn't happen right? I mean what on earth had I done in my life to wish for something so almost laughably dramatic. I was just a kinda wimpy teenager who was more than a bit out of her depth with this whole elf thing. Generally I reckoned it was best not to take life too seriously but right know I felt it was kinda best I should.

Oh, and of course if the whole 'traitor' thing really wasn't enough there was the added nervousness of a very fit elf sitting in front of me and…. well…being really sweet! Oh yeah, and he looked so hot when he was worried! Ok, I really should be worrying about impending death right know…and don't even try and look sweet your hair is a MESS and your face blotched bright red and you know it!

"I don't know how serious he is, it is not in his character to jest about such matters if that is what you mean," he sighed.

"Why did you tell me?" I asked

"Tell you what?"

"Well that Erestor wants to kill me,"

"Surely you would want to know if someone wants you dead?" he looked genuinely shocked. I thought for a moment, sniffing every now and then. So not sexy, but tough.

"I'm not really as brave as you," I began then realised how childish that sounded. Glorfindel was smiling at me though, "and if I can do nothing about him thinking what he thinks of me then I'd rather not know. Sorry, I'm just not very good at bravely facing up to facts." well, he has got to know I'm a wimp at some point.

"Yet you're brave enough to admit that," I couldn't help thinking that perhaps he was searching for good things to say about me, let him search!

"Heh, its stupidity not bravery," I laughed a little.

"How ever you want to put it, I will remember in future not to tell you of such things. Now then," Glorfindel said pulling up a chair next to the bed where I sat huddled. "I want to know down to every last detail why a very blue Erestor disturbed my meal this morning. I couldn't help laughing a little at this memory.

I put my arms round my legs and propped my chin on my knees and began to retell to a highly amused Glorfindel exactly why Erestor was blue.

I finished this faithful account (well I missed out a few bits like me not being able to climb a tree and that sort of totally irrelevant stuff). I looked anxiously at Glorfindel. He was going to think it was so immature… however he was smiling so it was ok, or he was pretending to be ok with it (I really do have insecurities).

"That's a lot of trouble to go to," he commented leaning back in his chair.

"Well I didn't really have anything else to do that morning." bad explanation, yes I know.

"Then we must find you things to do in the mornings!"

"Like?" I wondered what on earth I could possibly do in Rivendell apart from admire the trees, and flowers, and birds, and rivers etc. Which was lovely, once in a while.

"What would you like to do?"

"I dunno," I said truthfully, how sad is that? Glorfindel thought for a moment and looked at me as if considering me.

"How would you like to learn to use sword assuming you haven't already?" he asked. I raised my eyebrows, didn't they have rules against girls fighting?

"Only at a very elementary level of course," he added. Thoughtful as his offer was, I knew one thing I didn't want to do – learn to fight. No way.

"Well, firstly I really wouldn't be good at it and secondly I'm scared of anything sharper than a pen…err quill." did they have quills in Middle-earth?

"You could start off with the blunt wooden training swords," he suggested.

"Well, maybe, but its not just that I'm scared of sharp things I would have to trust the person I was learning from and I don't know the instructors you have here." I said and really it was true, I wasn't going to let just anyone attack me with anything wood or metal. That would just be stupid!

"You know me," he said smiling. Whoa, there is no way a balrog slayer could teach me, and that is a fact.

"But you're the Balrog slayer!" I said needlessly, I'm sure he knew that he was the balrog slayer, it's the sort of thing you remember in your life killing balrogs, not that I would know of course.

"You know a lot about me," he commented.

"It's just a story I heard, a lay if you like you know the song about you?" I said hoping to god that someone had written a song about him.

"I see," he said, he looked mildly flattered, I emphasise MILDLY, you could only just tell it.

"Anyway," I said changing the subject, "I really couldn't train with you,"

"Why ever not?" he said looking puzzled.

"Well you're the balrog slayer!" I repeated as if this explained everything "I've never held a sword in my life!" as he still looked confused I attempted to clarify, "I would waster your time, there are better elves you could be teaching, I don't deserve to learn from a balrog slayer! Balrog slayers are just totally out of my league!" wasn't that much obvious to him looking at me blotchy faced and soaking wet hair?

"I have slain one or two orcs in my time as well you know," he said grinning.

"That's not the point!" couldn't he just stop annoying me? "The point is I would feel guilty taking up your time, hell I feel guilty taking up your time now never mind every morning!"

"The point is also that I have never taught a mortal girl, I am intrigued to see if it can be done."

That was just mean, he knew I could never refuse now, insulting the female race like that, he'd pay (or maybe not).

"Ok, I accept your challenge to be taught by a balrog slayer!"

"Very good, I shall meet you at nine o'clock in the training grounds," and with that and a nod/bow thing he left closing the door behind him.

I had almost forgot the whole Erestor situation. Almost.

Ala and Tin: Thank you to all you lovely reviewers out there! We love youvery much!