Rating and Warnings: NC-13, because Jesse felt like swearing (I don't think
it's too bad, but it might get worse later.)
Disclaimer: Not mine, I just like to play with them for a little while.
A/N: Marzze brings out the family photos, Laxus wants a drinking contest and Jesse has no driving licence. A perfect recipe for disaster.
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Chapter 7: How to Drive a Hovercar
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They used Gattler's hovercar to get into town and after about an hour and a half found an establishment that met with Marzze's reluctant approval and no flat out refusal from any of the others. In fact the only thing Jesse found wrong with it was the half naked serving girls. Not that they didn't look pretty, but they were supposed to be here on business and it didn't look like Marzze would be able to resist distraction.
Then again Marzze was only here because he was Jesse's father. The only one they needed to actually bother with was Laxus. Not that Laxus was much better than Marzze, but at least he was able to keep his hormones in check better than his cousin.
Jean Claude ordered a large bowl of refreshment fruits for their table in the hopes that that would keep the serving girls away and their guests happy, then turned to Laxus who was annoying Gattler with comments about the decor.
-So, lets get started.- he suggested.
-What? ... Oh! Oh yes, the plans. ... Where did I put the ... Right, right. I'm afraid I forgot my briefcase in the car. Marzze why don't you show them those photos while I go get them?-
Marzze however was currently busy eyeing the behind of a light-blue-skinned serving girl who was bent over the table behind him. He licked his lips absent-mindedly as he stretched his hand over to give it a slight pat.
The girl started upright and moved a few steps to the left to get out of his reach.
Marzze gave a disappointed sigh.
-Marzze! Hey, Marzze!- Laxus waved at him jovially.
-Huh, what?-
-The photos, Marzze.- Laxus reminded him.
-Ah, ah yes.- Marzze nodded and started digging around in his pocket. -I brought a few pictures of my closest family. Thought Jesse would like to know a little about them before he meets them.-
-I have no intention of meeting anybody.- Jesse frowned.
Marzze regarded him once again and frowned as well. -I'm not all that happy about it either, but Laxus says his Nastiness insists you're part of the family. Ah, there they are.-
Jean Claude almost groaned. Did those two have to be this honest with each other? This way Jesse would never learn to accept his Outrider family.
Marzze finally pulled out a small holopicture projector and sat it on the table right next to the fruit bowl.
-There.- he declared as he turned it on. -This is me with my wife, your stepmother. Her name's Irzhe and she's a scientist. A common born member of our house. We've been married for fifteen years now.-
Irzhe was a blond, pink skinned Outrider woman who looked about a decade younger than her husband. Her smile in the picture seemed false. Considering what Gattler had told him about Marzze's bastards Jesse assumed that it wasn't a happy marriage. Not that he cared in the slightest. He wished Laxus would get back with those plans. A help seeking glance towards Jean Claude was answered with a nod towards the damn holo projector. So his only ally was deserting him as well?
-And here we have a baby photo of your brother Cozz.- Marzze continued happily. -He doesn't look like that anymore of course. He's grown a bit over the 21 years since then. Here's a more recent picture.- Marzze declared proudly.
Jesse regarded the picture of a young Outrider with short cropped teal hair and slightly bluish skin. Yes, he did get the impression that Cozz was indeed very tall.
And he was expected to consider that blue thing his brother? No, absolutely not. Cozz could stay just wherever he was and preferably Marzze and the rest of his brood right with him.
-Quite the chip off the old block.- Marzze continued beaming at the picture. -Despite the unfortunate fact that his mother is a common farm girl. Takes after his father fortunately. Right now he's in his second year of officers training at the Warrior Academy. Just you wait, we'll have a Commander in the family, yet.- He sighed. -I didn't make Commander, because Cozz was born while I was still at the Academy and my father insisted I start earning money to support my boy. It was a deep disappointment for me at the time, but Cozz is on the best way to make up for it. If I can't be a Commander, I'd at least like to have a son who is.-
Well, in that case maybe Cozz had better not say where he was. Another idiot commander like Laxus was the last thing Jesse needed in his life.
-You already do.- Jean Claude remarked dryly nodding towards Jesse. -You've had one for almost two years.-
Marzze gave Jesse another of his disparaging looks. -He doesn't look like much of a commander.-
Jesse shot him his iciest glare. Who the hell did Marzze think he was? He definitely didn't even look like much of a soldier himself. Probably wasn't, if playing around with helpless female prisoners was the best he could do.
-Looks can be deceiving.- Gattler threw in. -And all you've seen so far is an attempt to annoy people.-
Marzze raised an eyebrow at Gattler.
-Annoying people is his hobby, I think.- Gattler shrugged.
So Gattler thought he was a psychologist now?
-Just don't let Nemesis see you like this.- Marzze finally told Jesse.
-Why not?- Jesse smirked.
-I doubt he'd care about clothes.- Jean Claude commented.
-I'll find something that gets to him.- Jesse promised. Marzze's face at that announcement alone was worth the trouble.
-You'll wind up in a phantom chamber one day.- Gattler informed him.
-You're one to talk.- Jesse shot back.
Marzze gulped at hearing the word phantom chamber and quickly switched to the next picture. -Cato at the age of two days.- he announced.
The picture showed a younger lrzhe holding a tiny bundle in her arms. All Jesse could see of Cato was a mop of teal hair.
-Cato?- he asked.
-Your second brother.- Marzze explained.
"Ceterum censeo ..." sighed Jesse rolling his eyes. -I just hope nobody's named Carthage.-
Jean Claude burst out laughing.
Gattler blinked: "Ceterum what?"
Marzze just stared.
"Ceterum censeo Cartaginem esse delendam.*" Jesse quoted. "Furthermore I believe Carthage is to be destroyed. Or something like that."
That apparently didn't help either Gattler or Marzze any.
-Well, here's Cato at age three, at ten and this one is a current picture.- Marzze continued hastily. Did it make him nervous to hear Jesse speak English? Then he'd have to do it more often! -He's fifteen now and will start at the Warrior Academy next year. The little idiot has gotten it into his head that he'd prefer the Science Academy, though, but he'll come around. I'll see to it.-
-Why?- asked Jean Claude to Jesse's surprise. -If he has the talent for it, you might as well let him. A few scientists are good for the clan and you've already got two warrior sons and several more children after Cato.-
-Really?- Marzze asked with a slight frown. -Then why didn't you go to the Science Academy yourself?-
-My sister did.- Jean Claude pointed out.
-And your father didn't mind?-
-He did.- Jean Claude admitted. -But she is his oldest child. That's always different.-
-She's also just a girl.- Mazze decided and called up the next picture. -Now here we have the twins. Catzze and Cairo, currently fourteen. Their mother was some barmaid. I can't remember her name, but she just dumped the girls on me right after they were born and took off, the little slut.-
-Cairo?- Jesse commented dryly. -We might really get Carthage any moment now.-
Catzze and Cairo were rather sweet looking, though. Their light teal hair was nicely braided and tied with white ribbons that looked surprisingly good against their bluish skin and they were playing with what Jesse assumed to be the Outrider equivalent of a puppy in the picture.
Still Jesse couldn't blame their mother for wanting nothing to do with Marzze. His own mother most certainly hadn't either. He frowned at the Outrider. How he hated that annoying face of his.
-Identical twins?- Gattler asked suddenly interested. -That's nice.- For a moment it looked like he was going to say more, but then he just looked back down at the picture with a sad expression.
Jesse shot Jean Claude a questioning look, but he seemed just as clueless about Gattler's reaction.
-Yes, identical twins.- Marzze confirmed. -And here are the false twins: Carszt and Caibe, both twelve now. Carszt's mother is a dock worker from the outpost, while Caibe is lrzhe's daughter, though.-
The picture showed a boy and girl, both teal haired and green skinned playing some sort of board game with multicoloured stones. Jesse could easily have mistaken them for real twins. Not that he cared whatever they were. Where the hell was Laxus?
-Carszt is a bit of a disappointment so far, I'm afraid. He's too much of a dreamer and not at all interested in real things. Doesn't even want to learn how to use a sword, lrzhe thinks he might grow out of it in time, though.- Marzze continued. -He's still got four years until he starts the Academy after all. He might be just a little behind in his development. Caibe at least enjoys all sorts of sports, though she's not as competitive as I'd like her to be. It might be due to lack of competition from Carszt, I suppose. The twins are too far ahead for her to beat and stay to themselves mostly and little Cain is too small to challenge her.-
Jesse frowned again. As if he'd care about all the details!
-You keep forgetting how young they are.- Laxus who'd just returned to their table reminded him. -Actually Caibe has very good aim for her age.-
-Yes, but I'd like her to show more ambition to improve that talent.- Marzze insisted. -Anyway, here's my youngest: your sister Cain. She's nine and her only interest seems to be collecting stuffed animals and model renegades so far.-
Unsurprisingly the little girl in the picture had teal hair, but her skin was white and with her hair open she looked almost like a miniature female version of Jesse, down to the cunning look in her eyes.
-Well, collecting model renegades sounds like a rather promising interest for a nine year old.- Gattler commented. -She'll be wanting to fly one in a few years.-
-Are you sure those are her only interests?- Jean Claude was staring right at the eyes of the girl in the picture as well.
-Cain?- Marzze scoffed. -She's a little nothing. Spirited at times, yes, but a rather weekly child. Her mother's an artist.-
-I've got a sister about her age, Marzze.- Jean Claude insisted. -There's nothing weakly about this child, believe me. They're all a little skinny looking at that age and she's got Jesse's eyes. I didn't think a child that young could look like that.-
Marzze just laughed and shook his head. -It's only a picture. She's a cute little nothing, if you meet her personally.-
Laxus however looked from the picture to Jesse and back again a few times, before admitting: -I see the resemblance. Guess there's no denying he's one of yours, Marzze.-
Marzze shot him an angry look.
-Go ahead and deny me.- Jesse told him with a shrug. -I want nothing to do with you or . . . him.- he ended nodding towards Laxus. 'Or your family.' was what he'd really wanted to say, but somehow at the sight of that picture the words had died unspoken on his tongue.
He looked at the picture again. His little sister, no doubt about it.
Jean Claude tore his eyes from Cain's picture to check Jesse's expression. That had sounded almost as if he'd suddenly found an interest in his siblings after all. He almost wished Laxus hadn't come back just yet. Maybe they'd have managed to get Jesse to open up for once. Right now his expression was as closed as ever, though he was still staring at the picture of the little girl.
Jean Claude thought he'd learned to read Jesse rather well. It was a difficult task most of the time, but he could by now predict his reactions more than half of the time. Right now however he wasn't sure. There was something there that he'd never seen in Jesse before. Maybe there was something he could say right now that would make Jesse accept his family?
-So, do you have those plans, Laxus?- Gattler asked destroying Jean Claude's chance. -It took you long enough to return.-
-Ah yes, well, I decided to have a little drink while I was already up and near the bar.- Laxus smiled. -Talking about drinks, isn't it time we ordered some?-
And before any of them could protest Marzze had waved over the serving girl that had caught his attention earlier.
So they all ordered something to drink and Laxus finally started to unpack his documents. A first glance at them revealed that Laxus' plans were sketchy at best. It would probably take days to produce something workable from them, Jesse assumed.
Then their drinks arrived.
-You call those drinks?- Laxus snorted. -We're in a bar and all you're having is fruit juices?-
-We're working.- Jean Claude reminded him. -We need to keep our heads clear to be able to judge your plans.-
-Pah!- Laxus leaned over to Jesse. -I challenge you to a drinking competition!-
Jesse's glare became icy again. He never drank much, not at all, if he could avoid it. His sharp mind was his strongest weapon and he knew it. Dulling it with alcohol was reckless stupidity in his opinion.
-No.- he told Laxus coldly.
-Oh, come on, boy.- Laxus coaxed. -Prove that you're a man.-
-He isn't.- Marzze reminded Laxus with a little grin. -He's just a teenager.-
-Coward.- Laxus mouthed at Jesse.
-Jesse's no challenge to you.- Jean Claude told Laxus. -He's very young and has no experience with Outrider alcohol at all. Fleshling drinks are much weaker. I'll drink with you, if it has to be.-
-Hah, you're not that much older than he is, are you?- Marzze laughed. -I bet the two of us could take all three of you kids.-
-Who are you calling a kid?- Gattler growled. -Fine, you're on. You there!- He pointed at the first serving girl in sight. -A bottle of your strongest and four glasses and fast!-
Jesse sighed. Well, at least Gattler had left him out of this. He wondered whether getting drunk counted among the things Nemesis expected him to keep his partners from. He hadn't exactly said so, but knowing Nemesis that didn't count for much. It was probably better, if Nemesis never found out about today.
At first they still tried to work between the drinking, but once they started on the second bottle Jesse had to give up all hopes to get any sort of results today. The more drunk the Outriders got, the less they understood the need for careful planning and the less Jesse understood them. A language full of s and z sounds was damn difficult to understand, if they were slurred so much they all sounded the same.
Marzze had turned his attention back to slapping or pinching the serving girls again, an inane grin on his face. Jesse was disgusted. He could not be related to that thing! He couldn't!
By the time Laxus ordered the third bottle Jesse had already had to rescue the papers from Jean Claude and was trying to work alone. Unfortunately he'd reached a part that included a lot of what he suspected might be technical terms that had something to do with computer programming, but couldn't make any sense of.
All attempts to get Jean Claude to translate anything were futile. The Outrider seemed to be about to pass out. He didn't even notice when Jesse took the precaution to hide his glass from him.
Gattler proved to be only marginally more alert, but did mumble something about not being a computer programmer, especially not a Fleshling one, which Jesse took as meaning he recognised the words, but couldn't translate or explain their meaning.
Jesse tried to grab his glass away as well, but Gattler proved to be stronger despite his state and Jesse didn't want to resort to more brutal means.
He eyed Marzze and Laxus for a bit, but neither spoke English at all, so asking them would be hopeless.
With a sigh he packed away the plans and watched the two of them finish off the bottle wondering how they were going to get home. When Laxus started calling for a fourth bottle he simply grabbed the approaching serving girl by the wrist and shook his head at her.
-No.- he said simply.
The girl took another look at his four companions and nodded in understanding. -You should probably try and get them out of here before they pass out.- she recommended.
Jesse didn't recognise the word 'pass out', but it wasn't hard to guess what she meant, or that she was right.
-Come on, Laxus, we're going home.- he tried and surprisingly got a quite positive result as Laxus turned to Marzze and shook him into a state of almost consciousness.
Gattler and Jean Claude proved to be more difficult. Gattler did get on his feet after some shaking and pushing, but Jean Claude didn't react to anything at all and Gattler was no help in dragging him out.
Jesse considered making Laxus carry Jean Claude, but he was already busy herding Marzze to the door past the serving girls and he actually had paid the bill which deserved some respect as it had been quite high.
Somehow he managed to drag Jean Claude back to the car himself and convince Gattler to get behind the controls. He couldn't make him start the car however.
-Come on, Gat. Get us home.- he pleaded.
-What?-
-Home Gat, drive us home.-
It was no use. Gattler was in no condition to drive anyway. Jean Claude was out of the question. Jesse turned towards Laxus and Marzze.
Neither of the two looked particularly fit, but Jesse had never driven a hovercar before at all. He could probably fly an Outrider fighter plane, since the controls weren't much different from the Badlander's, but he had very little experience riding Outrider ground vehicles and never bothered to watch the driver at all. Hell, he didn't even have a licence for driving a human car. He'd been too busy with his piloting lessons at the academy at first, then he hadn't had the money to spare after he'd left there.
Damn. Jean Claude could drive just about anything, no matter whether it was an Outrider or a human vehicle. Why had he never asked him for driving lessons?
-Can you drive?- Jesse asked Laxus since he seemed the most coherent.
-No, I alwaysh ushe a driver.- slurred Laxus.
Jesse blinked. Were those new words, or just the effect of the alcohol? -What?-
-A shervant. I have a shervant to drive.-
Jesse decided that 'no' had been the only answer he really needed. -How about Marzze?-
Laxus gave his cousin a doubtful look.
-Can you drive, Marzze?- Jesse asked.
-You have the wrong name, boy.- Marzze informed him sleepily. -Need one with C.-
Jesse sighed. -Not Carthage, please.- Marzze wouldn't remember any of this in the morning anyway, but just in case he did, he didn't want anyone to call him that in front of Cato. Maybe he was just a little superstitious.
-Can't you drive?- Laxus suddenly asked.
-I'll have to.- Jesse decided. -I only know how to fly, though. Move over, Gat, I'm taking us home.-
It took a moment to convince Gattler to get out of the way and hand over the chip card that was supposed to start the car.
Jesse regarded the controls in front of him. Flying was supposed to be harder than driving, right? So then it oughtn't to be that difficult to just get that car running and steer it home through almost empty streets, if he just took it slow.
He inserted the card and the car gave a soft hum as a response. So far so good. Now to get it moving.
Jesse pushed the little forward arrow button and the car shrieked in protest.
-Got to hover firsht.- Laxus commented.
-I noticed.- Jesse growled. So how did you get this thing off the ground?
When Gattler had done this it had risen at the same time it had started humming. Since it hadn't this time Jesse assumed that he must have activated another control at the same time he'd inserted the card. That meant he couldn't have used the same hand for it.
Searching the controls near his left hand Jesse found an up-down button. That looked rather promising. He gave it a push and the luggage compartment sprang open.
-Damn.- he swore not even noticing he was speaking Outrider out of habit.
Luckily another push of the same button closed the door again.
Jesse tried another button and the front window scrolled down. Hey, this thing was probably even convertible into a cabriolet!
Next he discovered how to tilt the side windows, open the maintenance panels and turn the car's lights on.
-Okay, this is at least a useful result.- he reported to Laxus. Now he could even see the road!
Unfortunately it took him almost five minutes to figure out how to turn the radio off again after his next attempt.
The temperature, gas and speed controls were familiar. They looked almost the same as the Badlander's. There also was a height control display and what looked like a radar screen, but he'd run out of buttons.
In his despair Jesse even searched the floor and found two pedals down there. Sitting back up he gave the first one an angry kick and the car shot up and slingered forward. Startled Jesse slammed his palm onto the stop button and breathed a sigh of relief when the car stopped with an angry 'Urk!'. He should have remembered to deactivate the forward button before he'd gone searching for the up one.
-Okay, I think, I've got it now.- he decided after a few deep breaths to calm himself. This was more nerve wreaking than a fire fight!
He released the stop button and the car rushed backwards. No. Stop. Forward. Go.
Things improved slightly once he gained full control over the speed controls, but it was difficult. He'd almost completely forgotten that most Outriders didn't have a dominant hand, at least not a very dominant one. He needed to use both hands equally much and move them independently to control the car. Left hand speed, right hand steering.
With some jerking and slingering and only a few scrapes against walls they finally arrived back outside the base. The automatic defences recognised the car and didn't sound an alarm, but Jesse had a feeling that he'd be in trouble if he tried to steer the it through the guarded control point at the entrance. Maybe he'd better park outside. They might be able to sneak in more easily on foot.
He stopped and kicked the up pedal once again and the car rose even higher. The other pedal turned out to be the key to getting down again.
Jesse grinned. If this thing could go just a little higher than it just had they could go over the fence into the car park and nobody would ever know. Well, unless somebody demanded to know how the scratches had gotten onto the car.
As it turned out the fence was a tiny bit higher than the car could get, but the car was stronger.
Slowly Jesse climbed out after he'd finally managed to park the car in a particularly out of the way part of the car park and inspected the damages. The car looked bad. The scratches on the side were quite ugly and there were even more at the front where the car had hit the fence. They probably continued down the whole length of its underside as well.
The fence looked even worse and Jesse had a feeling that unlike the condition of Gattler's car this might interest his Nastiness. Well, he probably had a chance not to get caught, if Gattler didn't kill him first.
He managed to convince Laxus and Marzze to get out of the car and on their way to wherever they might be staying, but Gattler didn't seem to remember the way home and Jean Claude still didn't react at all.
Well, Jesse knew where Jean Claude slept, but what about Gattler? Did he live in the same dorm? Well, maybe one of Jean Claude's dorm mates would know what to do with him.
It was just his luck that the only person home when he knocked happened to be Razzle.
"Oh, the little something." Razzle sneered at him. "Or would that be nothing? What the hell do you want here?"
Jesse sighed and just pointed towards his two companions. -Laxus. Drinking contest.- He was too exhausted to deal with Razzle.
Razzle blinked. Jesse realised too late that he'd spoken Outrider. "And you're the least drunk of the lot?"
"Didn't drink. Just tired."
"Tired?" Razzle did at least pull Gattler inside.
"I had to spend the whole day with Laxus and Marzze." Jesse hissed suddenly reminded of his hatred of the two. He'd almost forgotten who they were while concentrating on the task of getting them home. "At a crowded bar they decided to get drunk at. I was left to try and work out a plan from sketchy notes written in Outrider in the middle of said bar while my translators decided to get drunk and then I had to ... Well, you really don't want to know how we got back. I've got a huge headache, two completely drunk Outriders on my hands and no results to show Nemesis."
"No reason to stand around out there looking like a lost puppy. You could at least get in here and help me put them into bed before someone sees them."
Well, if it'd get him into his own bed faster.
The dorm looked pretty alien to Jesse, but at least he recognised the Outrider beds. Gattler did climb into his on his own and with Razzle's help Jesse managed to get Jean Claude into bed as well.
Exhausted Jesse let himself drop onto the next empty bed in sight. Nice and soft, he decided, even though he usually found Outrider beds a little uncomfortable and much preferred his own more human styled one. He'd managed to sleep in one during his time in med bay, though.
"Just what gave you the idea to take Laxus to a bar anyway?" Razzle asked him sitting down on his own bed. "That's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard."
"Mrmn?"
The way to his own room seemed terribly far all of a sudden. Maybe if he rested just a moment longer?
"That's Grammis' bed you're in right now."
No answer.
"Fine, not my problem." Razzle declared with a shrug.
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Junona - Oh, I've been wanting to at least let the Sheriffs have a little scene from the start, but they don't fit in right now. . . . Thanks, just don't start thinking of me as a humour writer. I never write with that goal in mind. The humorous parts are just my little decorations.
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Next: Jesse and co need to report the results they don't have back to Nemesis, Laxus seems to have disappeared and Jesse remembers he isn't allowed on this level of the base at all.
Disclaimer: Not mine, I just like to play with them for a little while.
A/N: Marzze brings out the family photos, Laxus wants a drinking contest and Jesse has no driving licence. A perfect recipe for disaster.
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Chapter 7: How to Drive a Hovercar
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They used Gattler's hovercar to get into town and after about an hour and a half found an establishment that met with Marzze's reluctant approval and no flat out refusal from any of the others. In fact the only thing Jesse found wrong with it was the half naked serving girls. Not that they didn't look pretty, but they were supposed to be here on business and it didn't look like Marzze would be able to resist distraction.
Then again Marzze was only here because he was Jesse's father. The only one they needed to actually bother with was Laxus. Not that Laxus was much better than Marzze, but at least he was able to keep his hormones in check better than his cousin.
Jean Claude ordered a large bowl of refreshment fruits for their table in the hopes that that would keep the serving girls away and their guests happy, then turned to Laxus who was annoying Gattler with comments about the decor.
-So, lets get started.- he suggested.
-What? ... Oh! Oh yes, the plans. ... Where did I put the ... Right, right. I'm afraid I forgot my briefcase in the car. Marzze why don't you show them those photos while I go get them?-
Marzze however was currently busy eyeing the behind of a light-blue-skinned serving girl who was bent over the table behind him. He licked his lips absent-mindedly as he stretched his hand over to give it a slight pat.
The girl started upright and moved a few steps to the left to get out of his reach.
Marzze gave a disappointed sigh.
-Marzze! Hey, Marzze!- Laxus waved at him jovially.
-Huh, what?-
-The photos, Marzze.- Laxus reminded him.
-Ah, ah yes.- Marzze nodded and started digging around in his pocket. -I brought a few pictures of my closest family. Thought Jesse would like to know a little about them before he meets them.-
-I have no intention of meeting anybody.- Jesse frowned.
Marzze regarded him once again and frowned as well. -I'm not all that happy about it either, but Laxus says his Nastiness insists you're part of the family. Ah, there they are.-
Jean Claude almost groaned. Did those two have to be this honest with each other? This way Jesse would never learn to accept his Outrider family.
Marzze finally pulled out a small holopicture projector and sat it on the table right next to the fruit bowl.
-There.- he declared as he turned it on. -This is me with my wife, your stepmother. Her name's Irzhe and she's a scientist. A common born member of our house. We've been married for fifteen years now.-
Irzhe was a blond, pink skinned Outrider woman who looked about a decade younger than her husband. Her smile in the picture seemed false. Considering what Gattler had told him about Marzze's bastards Jesse assumed that it wasn't a happy marriage. Not that he cared in the slightest. He wished Laxus would get back with those plans. A help seeking glance towards Jean Claude was answered with a nod towards the damn holo projector. So his only ally was deserting him as well?
-And here we have a baby photo of your brother Cozz.- Marzze continued happily. -He doesn't look like that anymore of course. He's grown a bit over the 21 years since then. Here's a more recent picture.- Marzze declared proudly.
Jesse regarded the picture of a young Outrider with short cropped teal hair and slightly bluish skin. Yes, he did get the impression that Cozz was indeed very tall.
And he was expected to consider that blue thing his brother? No, absolutely not. Cozz could stay just wherever he was and preferably Marzze and the rest of his brood right with him.
-Quite the chip off the old block.- Marzze continued beaming at the picture. -Despite the unfortunate fact that his mother is a common farm girl. Takes after his father fortunately. Right now he's in his second year of officers training at the Warrior Academy. Just you wait, we'll have a Commander in the family, yet.- He sighed. -I didn't make Commander, because Cozz was born while I was still at the Academy and my father insisted I start earning money to support my boy. It was a deep disappointment for me at the time, but Cozz is on the best way to make up for it. If I can't be a Commander, I'd at least like to have a son who is.-
Well, in that case maybe Cozz had better not say where he was. Another idiot commander like Laxus was the last thing Jesse needed in his life.
-You already do.- Jean Claude remarked dryly nodding towards Jesse. -You've had one for almost two years.-
Marzze gave Jesse another of his disparaging looks. -He doesn't look like much of a commander.-
Jesse shot him his iciest glare. Who the hell did Marzze think he was? He definitely didn't even look like much of a soldier himself. Probably wasn't, if playing around with helpless female prisoners was the best he could do.
-Looks can be deceiving.- Gattler threw in. -And all you've seen so far is an attempt to annoy people.-
Marzze raised an eyebrow at Gattler.
-Annoying people is his hobby, I think.- Gattler shrugged.
So Gattler thought he was a psychologist now?
-Just don't let Nemesis see you like this.- Marzze finally told Jesse.
-Why not?- Jesse smirked.
-I doubt he'd care about clothes.- Jean Claude commented.
-I'll find something that gets to him.- Jesse promised. Marzze's face at that announcement alone was worth the trouble.
-You'll wind up in a phantom chamber one day.- Gattler informed him.
-You're one to talk.- Jesse shot back.
Marzze gulped at hearing the word phantom chamber and quickly switched to the next picture. -Cato at the age of two days.- he announced.
The picture showed a younger lrzhe holding a tiny bundle in her arms. All Jesse could see of Cato was a mop of teal hair.
-Cato?- he asked.
-Your second brother.- Marzze explained.
"Ceterum censeo ..." sighed Jesse rolling his eyes. -I just hope nobody's named Carthage.-
Jean Claude burst out laughing.
Gattler blinked: "Ceterum what?"
Marzze just stared.
"Ceterum censeo Cartaginem esse delendam.*" Jesse quoted. "Furthermore I believe Carthage is to be destroyed. Or something like that."
That apparently didn't help either Gattler or Marzze any.
-Well, here's Cato at age three, at ten and this one is a current picture.- Marzze continued hastily. Did it make him nervous to hear Jesse speak English? Then he'd have to do it more often! -He's fifteen now and will start at the Warrior Academy next year. The little idiot has gotten it into his head that he'd prefer the Science Academy, though, but he'll come around. I'll see to it.-
-Why?- asked Jean Claude to Jesse's surprise. -If he has the talent for it, you might as well let him. A few scientists are good for the clan and you've already got two warrior sons and several more children after Cato.-
-Really?- Marzze asked with a slight frown. -Then why didn't you go to the Science Academy yourself?-
-My sister did.- Jean Claude pointed out.
-And your father didn't mind?-
-He did.- Jean Claude admitted. -But she is his oldest child. That's always different.-
-She's also just a girl.- Mazze decided and called up the next picture. -Now here we have the twins. Catzze and Cairo, currently fourteen. Their mother was some barmaid. I can't remember her name, but she just dumped the girls on me right after they were born and took off, the little slut.-
-Cairo?- Jesse commented dryly. -We might really get Carthage any moment now.-
Catzze and Cairo were rather sweet looking, though. Their light teal hair was nicely braided and tied with white ribbons that looked surprisingly good against their bluish skin and they were playing with what Jesse assumed to be the Outrider equivalent of a puppy in the picture.
Still Jesse couldn't blame their mother for wanting nothing to do with Marzze. His own mother most certainly hadn't either. He frowned at the Outrider. How he hated that annoying face of his.
-Identical twins?- Gattler asked suddenly interested. -That's nice.- For a moment it looked like he was going to say more, but then he just looked back down at the picture with a sad expression.
Jesse shot Jean Claude a questioning look, but he seemed just as clueless about Gattler's reaction.
-Yes, identical twins.- Marzze confirmed. -And here are the false twins: Carszt and Caibe, both twelve now. Carszt's mother is a dock worker from the outpost, while Caibe is lrzhe's daughter, though.-
The picture showed a boy and girl, both teal haired and green skinned playing some sort of board game with multicoloured stones. Jesse could easily have mistaken them for real twins. Not that he cared whatever they were. Where the hell was Laxus?
-Carszt is a bit of a disappointment so far, I'm afraid. He's too much of a dreamer and not at all interested in real things. Doesn't even want to learn how to use a sword, lrzhe thinks he might grow out of it in time, though.- Marzze continued. -He's still got four years until he starts the Academy after all. He might be just a little behind in his development. Caibe at least enjoys all sorts of sports, though she's not as competitive as I'd like her to be. It might be due to lack of competition from Carszt, I suppose. The twins are too far ahead for her to beat and stay to themselves mostly and little Cain is too small to challenge her.-
Jesse frowned again. As if he'd care about all the details!
-You keep forgetting how young they are.- Laxus who'd just returned to their table reminded him. -Actually Caibe has very good aim for her age.-
-Yes, but I'd like her to show more ambition to improve that talent.- Marzze insisted. -Anyway, here's my youngest: your sister Cain. She's nine and her only interest seems to be collecting stuffed animals and model renegades so far.-
Unsurprisingly the little girl in the picture had teal hair, but her skin was white and with her hair open she looked almost like a miniature female version of Jesse, down to the cunning look in her eyes.
-Well, collecting model renegades sounds like a rather promising interest for a nine year old.- Gattler commented. -She'll be wanting to fly one in a few years.-
-Are you sure those are her only interests?- Jean Claude was staring right at the eyes of the girl in the picture as well.
-Cain?- Marzze scoffed. -She's a little nothing. Spirited at times, yes, but a rather weekly child. Her mother's an artist.-
-I've got a sister about her age, Marzze.- Jean Claude insisted. -There's nothing weakly about this child, believe me. They're all a little skinny looking at that age and she's got Jesse's eyes. I didn't think a child that young could look like that.-
Marzze just laughed and shook his head. -It's only a picture. She's a cute little nothing, if you meet her personally.-
Laxus however looked from the picture to Jesse and back again a few times, before admitting: -I see the resemblance. Guess there's no denying he's one of yours, Marzze.-
Marzze shot him an angry look.
-Go ahead and deny me.- Jesse told him with a shrug. -I want nothing to do with you or . . . him.- he ended nodding towards Laxus. 'Or your family.' was what he'd really wanted to say, but somehow at the sight of that picture the words had died unspoken on his tongue.
He looked at the picture again. His little sister, no doubt about it.
Jean Claude tore his eyes from Cain's picture to check Jesse's expression. That had sounded almost as if he'd suddenly found an interest in his siblings after all. He almost wished Laxus hadn't come back just yet. Maybe they'd have managed to get Jesse to open up for once. Right now his expression was as closed as ever, though he was still staring at the picture of the little girl.
Jean Claude thought he'd learned to read Jesse rather well. It was a difficult task most of the time, but he could by now predict his reactions more than half of the time. Right now however he wasn't sure. There was something there that he'd never seen in Jesse before. Maybe there was something he could say right now that would make Jesse accept his family?
-So, do you have those plans, Laxus?- Gattler asked destroying Jean Claude's chance. -It took you long enough to return.-
-Ah yes, well, I decided to have a little drink while I was already up and near the bar.- Laxus smiled. -Talking about drinks, isn't it time we ordered some?-
And before any of them could protest Marzze had waved over the serving girl that had caught his attention earlier.
So they all ordered something to drink and Laxus finally started to unpack his documents. A first glance at them revealed that Laxus' plans were sketchy at best. It would probably take days to produce something workable from them, Jesse assumed.
Then their drinks arrived.
-You call those drinks?- Laxus snorted. -We're in a bar and all you're having is fruit juices?-
-We're working.- Jean Claude reminded him. -We need to keep our heads clear to be able to judge your plans.-
-Pah!- Laxus leaned over to Jesse. -I challenge you to a drinking competition!-
Jesse's glare became icy again. He never drank much, not at all, if he could avoid it. His sharp mind was his strongest weapon and he knew it. Dulling it with alcohol was reckless stupidity in his opinion.
-No.- he told Laxus coldly.
-Oh, come on, boy.- Laxus coaxed. -Prove that you're a man.-
-He isn't.- Marzze reminded Laxus with a little grin. -He's just a teenager.-
-Coward.- Laxus mouthed at Jesse.
-Jesse's no challenge to you.- Jean Claude told Laxus. -He's very young and has no experience with Outrider alcohol at all. Fleshling drinks are much weaker. I'll drink with you, if it has to be.-
-Hah, you're not that much older than he is, are you?- Marzze laughed. -I bet the two of us could take all three of you kids.-
-Who are you calling a kid?- Gattler growled. -Fine, you're on. You there!- He pointed at the first serving girl in sight. -A bottle of your strongest and four glasses and fast!-
Jesse sighed. Well, at least Gattler had left him out of this. He wondered whether getting drunk counted among the things Nemesis expected him to keep his partners from. He hadn't exactly said so, but knowing Nemesis that didn't count for much. It was probably better, if Nemesis never found out about today.
At first they still tried to work between the drinking, but once they started on the second bottle Jesse had to give up all hopes to get any sort of results today. The more drunk the Outriders got, the less they understood the need for careful planning and the less Jesse understood them. A language full of s and z sounds was damn difficult to understand, if they were slurred so much they all sounded the same.
Marzze had turned his attention back to slapping or pinching the serving girls again, an inane grin on his face. Jesse was disgusted. He could not be related to that thing! He couldn't!
By the time Laxus ordered the third bottle Jesse had already had to rescue the papers from Jean Claude and was trying to work alone. Unfortunately he'd reached a part that included a lot of what he suspected might be technical terms that had something to do with computer programming, but couldn't make any sense of.
All attempts to get Jean Claude to translate anything were futile. The Outrider seemed to be about to pass out. He didn't even notice when Jesse took the precaution to hide his glass from him.
Gattler proved to be only marginally more alert, but did mumble something about not being a computer programmer, especially not a Fleshling one, which Jesse took as meaning he recognised the words, but couldn't translate or explain their meaning.
Jesse tried to grab his glass away as well, but Gattler proved to be stronger despite his state and Jesse didn't want to resort to more brutal means.
He eyed Marzze and Laxus for a bit, but neither spoke English at all, so asking them would be hopeless.
With a sigh he packed away the plans and watched the two of them finish off the bottle wondering how they were going to get home. When Laxus started calling for a fourth bottle he simply grabbed the approaching serving girl by the wrist and shook his head at her.
-No.- he said simply.
The girl took another look at his four companions and nodded in understanding. -You should probably try and get them out of here before they pass out.- she recommended.
Jesse didn't recognise the word 'pass out', but it wasn't hard to guess what she meant, or that she was right.
-Come on, Laxus, we're going home.- he tried and surprisingly got a quite positive result as Laxus turned to Marzze and shook him into a state of almost consciousness.
Gattler and Jean Claude proved to be more difficult. Gattler did get on his feet after some shaking and pushing, but Jean Claude didn't react to anything at all and Gattler was no help in dragging him out.
Jesse considered making Laxus carry Jean Claude, but he was already busy herding Marzze to the door past the serving girls and he actually had paid the bill which deserved some respect as it had been quite high.
Somehow he managed to drag Jean Claude back to the car himself and convince Gattler to get behind the controls. He couldn't make him start the car however.
-Come on, Gat. Get us home.- he pleaded.
-What?-
-Home Gat, drive us home.-
It was no use. Gattler was in no condition to drive anyway. Jean Claude was out of the question. Jesse turned towards Laxus and Marzze.
Neither of the two looked particularly fit, but Jesse had never driven a hovercar before at all. He could probably fly an Outrider fighter plane, since the controls weren't much different from the Badlander's, but he had very little experience riding Outrider ground vehicles and never bothered to watch the driver at all. Hell, he didn't even have a licence for driving a human car. He'd been too busy with his piloting lessons at the academy at first, then he hadn't had the money to spare after he'd left there.
Damn. Jean Claude could drive just about anything, no matter whether it was an Outrider or a human vehicle. Why had he never asked him for driving lessons?
-Can you drive?- Jesse asked Laxus since he seemed the most coherent.
-No, I alwaysh ushe a driver.- slurred Laxus.
Jesse blinked. Were those new words, or just the effect of the alcohol? -What?-
-A shervant. I have a shervant to drive.-
Jesse decided that 'no' had been the only answer he really needed. -How about Marzze?-
Laxus gave his cousin a doubtful look.
-Can you drive, Marzze?- Jesse asked.
-You have the wrong name, boy.- Marzze informed him sleepily. -Need one with C.-
Jesse sighed. -Not Carthage, please.- Marzze wouldn't remember any of this in the morning anyway, but just in case he did, he didn't want anyone to call him that in front of Cato. Maybe he was just a little superstitious.
-Can't you drive?- Laxus suddenly asked.
-I'll have to.- Jesse decided. -I only know how to fly, though. Move over, Gat, I'm taking us home.-
It took a moment to convince Gattler to get out of the way and hand over the chip card that was supposed to start the car.
Jesse regarded the controls in front of him. Flying was supposed to be harder than driving, right? So then it oughtn't to be that difficult to just get that car running and steer it home through almost empty streets, if he just took it slow.
He inserted the card and the car gave a soft hum as a response. So far so good. Now to get it moving.
Jesse pushed the little forward arrow button and the car shrieked in protest.
-Got to hover firsht.- Laxus commented.
-I noticed.- Jesse growled. So how did you get this thing off the ground?
When Gattler had done this it had risen at the same time it had started humming. Since it hadn't this time Jesse assumed that he must have activated another control at the same time he'd inserted the card. That meant he couldn't have used the same hand for it.
Searching the controls near his left hand Jesse found an up-down button. That looked rather promising. He gave it a push and the luggage compartment sprang open.
-Damn.- he swore not even noticing he was speaking Outrider out of habit.
Luckily another push of the same button closed the door again.
Jesse tried another button and the front window scrolled down. Hey, this thing was probably even convertible into a cabriolet!
Next he discovered how to tilt the side windows, open the maintenance panels and turn the car's lights on.
-Okay, this is at least a useful result.- he reported to Laxus. Now he could even see the road!
Unfortunately it took him almost five minutes to figure out how to turn the radio off again after his next attempt.
The temperature, gas and speed controls were familiar. They looked almost the same as the Badlander's. There also was a height control display and what looked like a radar screen, but he'd run out of buttons.
In his despair Jesse even searched the floor and found two pedals down there. Sitting back up he gave the first one an angry kick and the car shot up and slingered forward. Startled Jesse slammed his palm onto the stop button and breathed a sigh of relief when the car stopped with an angry 'Urk!'. He should have remembered to deactivate the forward button before he'd gone searching for the up one.
-Okay, I think, I've got it now.- he decided after a few deep breaths to calm himself. This was more nerve wreaking than a fire fight!
He released the stop button and the car rushed backwards. No. Stop. Forward. Go.
Things improved slightly once he gained full control over the speed controls, but it was difficult. He'd almost completely forgotten that most Outriders didn't have a dominant hand, at least not a very dominant one. He needed to use both hands equally much and move them independently to control the car. Left hand speed, right hand steering.
With some jerking and slingering and only a few scrapes against walls they finally arrived back outside the base. The automatic defences recognised the car and didn't sound an alarm, but Jesse had a feeling that he'd be in trouble if he tried to steer the it through the guarded control point at the entrance. Maybe he'd better park outside. They might be able to sneak in more easily on foot.
He stopped and kicked the up pedal once again and the car rose even higher. The other pedal turned out to be the key to getting down again.
Jesse grinned. If this thing could go just a little higher than it just had they could go over the fence into the car park and nobody would ever know. Well, unless somebody demanded to know how the scratches had gotten onto the car.
As it turned out the fence was a tiny bit higher than the car could get, but the car was stronger.
Slowly Jesse climbed out after he'd finally managed to park the car in a particularly out of the way part of the car park and inspected the damages. The car looked bad. The scratches on the side were quite ugly and there were even more at the front where the car had hit the fence. They probably continued down the whole length of its underside as well.
The fence looked even worse and Jesse had a feeling that unlike the condition of Gattler's car this might interest his Nastiness. Well, he probably had a chance not to get caught, if Gattler didn't kill him first.
He managed to convince Laxus and Marzze to get out of the car and on their way to wherever they might be staying, but Gattler didn't seem to remember the way home and Jean Claude still didn't react at all.
Well, Jesse knew where Jean Claude slept, but what about Gattler? Did he live in the same dorm? Well, maybe one of Jean Claude's dorm mates would know what to do with him.
It was just his luck that the only person home when he knocked happened to be Razzle.
"Oh, the little something." Razzle sneered at him. "Or would that be nothing? What the hell do you want here?"
Jesse sighed and just pointed towards his two companions. -Laxus. Drinking contest.- He was too exhausted to deal with Razzle.
Razzle blinked. Jesse realised too late that he'd spoken Outrider. "And you're the least drunk of the lot?"
"Didn't drink. Just tired."
"Tired?" Razzle did at least pull Gattler inside.
"I had to spend the whole day with Laxus and Marzze." Jesse hissed suddenly reminded of his hatred of the two. He'd almost forgotten who they were while concentrating on the task of getting them home. "At a crowded bar they decided to get drunk at. I was left to try and work out a plan from sketchy notes written in Outrider in the middle of said bar while my translators decided to get drunk and then I had to ... Well, you really don't want to know how we got back. I've got a huge headache, two completely drunk Outriders on my hands and no results to show Nemesis."
"No reason to stand around out there looking like a lost puppy. You could at least get in here and help me put them into bed before someone sees them."
Well, if it'd get him into his own bed faster.
The dorm looked pretty alien to Jesse, but at least he recognised the Outrider beds. Gattler did climb into his on his own and with Razzle's help Jesse managed to get Jean Claude into bed as well.
Exhausted Jesse let himself drop onto the next empty bed in sight. Nice and soft, he decided, even though he usually found Outrider beds a little uncomfortable and much preferred his own more human styled one. He'd managed to sleep in one during his time in med bay, though.
"Just what gave you the idea to take Laxus to a bar anyway?" Razzle asked him sitting down on his own bed. "That's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard."
"Mrmn?"
The way to his own room seemed terribly far all of a sudden. Maybe if he rested just a moment longer?
"That's Grammis' bed you're in right now."
No answer.
"Fine, not my problem." Razzle declared with a shrug.
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Junona - Oh, I've been wanting to at least let the Sheriffs have a little scene from the start, but they don't fit in right now. . . . Thanks, just don't start thinking of me as a humour writer. I never write with that goal in mind. The humorous parts are just my little decorations.
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Next: Jesse and co need to report the results they don't have back to Nemesis, Laxus seems to have disappeared and Jesse remembers he isn't allowed on this level of the base at all.