Chapter Eight: Behind These Bars, a Shameless Inquisition!
No more bullshit I thought darkly, as I came to rest before her, kneeling once more upon the ground.
"Please, Ms. Satou, take a seat. We have much to discuss."
She came to rest immediately. It was businesslike, sharp, and efficient. There was no lying here; This woman was pissed, and I was on thin ice.
Lilly sat still, fuming to herself while trying to assemble her thoughts, before starting in a calm, cold, not – Lilly voice.
"How did you get here?"
"I drove."
Lilly froze for a moment, before she continued.
"I had family on that case, you know. You should be buried for what you did. Ashamed. And yet, here you are, living a farce of an existence, and now... you're here, and in the company of my best friend no less."
This is... Outrageous. Infuriating.
... Intriguing.
She knows who I am. She knows what I – supposedly – did. And yet, she told me who she was, and how she was connected. Despite this... She's not stupid... Maybe...
"It's strange, isn't it? That they let this monster out upon your school. And a hungry one, at that. You're a smart girl, Lilly. I'm certain you have thoughts on this matter."
She froze for a moment, before she backpedalled and went down another road.
"Is this supposed to be funny? If i knew where I was pointing, I would spit at you."
I adjusted my position, sitting directly in front of her.
"I moved."
She froze, unable to think of something to do in this situation. So, I went on the offensive.
"You offend me, Ms. Satou. To think I am not even worthy of the spittle between your lips, let alone the benefit of the doubt, no matter what circumstance you may be in, even without your knowing."
She spat at that, glaring as best as a blind girl could.
"Keep going, Lilly. I'm sure that, eventually, you'll start to make some progress here."
Her hands were shaking, now. I used my forearm to guide her hand to my face. She was petrified, until she realized what I did, a look of disgust came across her features and she slapped me across my face.
"You... you... You animal!"
She was seething now. I had reached my goal, and it was time to lay down my chips.
"... are you satisfied now?"
My voice was no longer the arrogant, dark one I used during the argument, but it was the one I used when telling my story to Hanako. It was empty, devoid of anything good, and it did exactly what it needed to.
She paused, immediately taken aback at just how broken I sounded.
"... when you thought of me... what did your mind envision, Lilly? I've heard some people tell me that they thought of... of everything dark in the world. That there was no good in my soul. Even if what they say about me was true... could there really be no hallowed ground? No honour?"
Lilly's face was screwed up with confusion, unable to keep a firm image of me in her mind anymore.
"What... Just what is this?"
I continued, not willing to give up even if she cried. Because, no matter who's tears it causes, I will Not be called a rapist.
"This, Lilly, is your fault. Your family did this to me. You seem to be the only one who will listen to me, so listen well. You see, I wasn't actually guilty of anything, aside from self defence. What happened, was that the man your family was paid to protect tried to rape a young woman on the streets. When myself, a confused, angry boy of thirteen years old, tried to save her, I was surrounded by twelve men, and slashed to ribbons with knives and beaten soft with metal clubs. Then, when all was said and done, and they took my joy from me... Your family was there, to pick up the slack on my noose. I was condemned, no longer having a family or reason to live, because I tried to do the right thing, and your father took a pay cheque."
She was crying now. She couldn't help but sob. Her hand was over her mouth, and she was bent over, unable to cope with this information.
"But you know what the kicker is?"
She turned her head up to me, still crying.
"... I forgive you."
She stopped, her tears flowing still, but with a choke she spoke.
"W – Whaa?"
She had her body in my direction, trying her hardest to pay attention to everything she could, afraid to miss what could be the most important conversation she's ever been in.
Ignoring her sobs, I continued.
"Lilly, Despite everything I had to go through... Despite losing everything I ever loved and then some... I forgive you. Why?"
She stopped breathing now, almost as if she could see who I really was, and I decided to speak.
"- Because you listened, Lilly. And even if you don't believe me, that's enough."
If she weren't out of tears, she would have cried all over again. Hyperventilating, she tried to speak.
"But – But – What can – What could possibly give you back that time? How could that heal that wound?"
I paused, letting her collect herself before I spoke again.
"Lilly, Forgiveness isn't about taking the bad out of life. It's about accepting it, and moving forward in spite of it. So, What about us? All of us? Can we move forward from here?"
She paused, simmering in the words I spoke. Like they were something she needed to hear all her life, but at the same time, didn't know she needed until now.
After a moment more, she spoke, slowly, timidly, but definitely calm. It was strangely warm; and it was laboured, but it would take time. I knew that, so I took the words for what they were.
"... I believe so. I believe... I believe that that was exactly what I was hoping to hear. Hoping beyond hope. Hanako is... dear to me. So very, very dear. I couldn't stand the thought of her being helpless to fight against... against you. But... I think that..."
I chuckled a little, interrupting her train of thought.
"- Slow down, Lilly. Rome wasn't built in a day. You don't have to say anything on this. In my mind, as long as you do what you need to, and make sure that you can live with the decision you make, no matter what it is, it'll be enough. I guess, though... I need to say this. I'm not sure exactly who this helps more here, but it needs to be said."
I rested my stump on her hand, which sat on her knee. She turned her ear to me, waiting.
"... I promise, no matter what kind of person I truly am, or what kind of person you view me to be, that so long as I breathe, I won't let myself or anyone else hurt your family. And Hanako is a part of that too."
She let out a breath, and stood slowly. She chewed on my words for three minutes, coming up with the best course of action.
"... I choose... to believe in you, Mikaru. I think I understand now. I just... I have something to say as well."
I listen, as she brings her hands up my chest, resting them on my cheeks softly. It is not the touch of a lover; it is the touch of a friend. I am okay with that.
"I know it means little to you, but... I am truly sorry. For anything I could possibly be sorry for, I am."
I smile. She feels the muscles of my face move, and smiles as well.
"... My name is Kanasu Mikaru. I am six feet-seven inches tall, I have blue, green and copper eyes, no hands and weigh 325 pounds."
Lilly giggles softly, and says, "My name is Satou Lilly. I apparently have milky blue eyes, I stand five feet, seven inches tall, can't see, and weigh 130 pounds. You may call me Lilly. What may I call you?"
I give her a friendly hug, and say softly "Stubbs... Call me Stubbs."
I poked my head out of the door, scanning briefly, Lilly's fingers wrapped around my forearm. Seeing that the coast is clear, I pull her softly out of the room, and point her in – What I hope is – The right direction. She bids me a soft farewell, and I turn away, saying my own before I walk away, lost in myself. That was... surprisingly successful. An older me would have relished the thought of meeting such a kindhearted, passionate person. Myself, However...
I was concerned.
While I was certain that crossing that bridge could only be a good thing for the four of us, at the same time, I find that it's that kind, accepting nature that could, one day, be our undoing. I know, no matter what anyone else says, that I am a good person, and that I wouldn't let anything happen to those people. But what if a real monster finds us? Someone whom wears the skin of a man or woman, but inside, has a heart of ash? I don't know if I can protect them from something like that.
Lost in my musings, I failed to see the flash of pink before it collided with me. I staggered back three paces. When I regained my bearings, I saw the offending projectile.
... Huh.
That 'Offending Projectile' was a girl. A tiny one. With no legs, no less. I let out a bit of a chuckle at her sorry state, despite myself. She was a Mess! If it were anyone else, I'm certain that she'd be fine. Unfortunately, she managed to find the one person in this whole school who could actually do their laundry on their abs, and had won numerous 'Brick Wall' competitions in the past (which consisted of finding the biggest, most gnarly dudes on the yard and playing football)... single – handed. No- handed? Whatever.
Pulling myself from my musings I notice the girl has regained consciousness, calling out to no one in particular. "Who the hell left this stupid trolley here! I could have gotten hurt!"
I laugh, and she looks up at me for the first time. I extend an arm to her. "You're right. You could have gotten hurt. You were out cold, after all. How does one go about finding the biggest, heaviest guy in the whole school, right when he's distracted the most, at the best possible moment, and still manage to collide with him – all with a head start, no less – and still lose?"
I smirked at her as several emotions danced around her at once. Most of them angry. Some of them... not so angry.
With a growl, she grabbed my arm and yanked herself into the air, somehow managing to right her useless legs in the process, only to land with a heavy THUD.
"You are... Probably the most infuriating, stupid, hard-headed jerk-wad I've Ever MET!"
She took a moment to glare at me. I left my confident smirk right where it was, having a good idea of where this conversation was going – at least, a little bit.
After glaring at me for ten more slow, silent seconds (Ten seconds of uninterrupted eye contact, with me? That was NOT smart of her.), she blushed, gave off what looked like a strong contender for the most manipulative, effective, and cutest pout ever, looked to the side, and said, "... It's a good thing you're cute, buddy, or I'd have to hold a grudge."
I bit back my laughter, giving off a flirty, challenging smile in response. "... That has got to be the greatest routine I have ever seen."
She looked back at me, incredulously, but after a moment, she beamed and giggled.
"You think so?! Really?"
I chuckle, and lean against the wall, putting my arms into my pockets. "Absolutely. If it were literally any other guy, Straight or no, you would have gotten them. Just like that - Smitten."
She blushed at that, and put her hands behind her back, rolling from one side to another. She froze after a moment, though, then snapped back up to me, distraught "HEY, WADDAYA MEAN, 'ANY OTHER GUY'?!"
I smirked, challenging her again, before looking down at her, almost childishly, definitely a little conspiratorially.
"... do you really wanna know?"
She blanched a bit, before she promptly blushed, and nodded. She watched me expectantly, and I started. Whatever she was expecting, it was not what I said.
"... It's a matter of Physics, believe it or not. - And Not the fun kind, before you get your panties in a twist about it. You see, unlike other guys who only think with their heads, I think with my brain. And that entails looking at some startling facts. Firstly, you're like, 4"11. You couldn't weigh a dime over 90 pounds, soaking wet. I'm not saying you're fragile, but... I'm like, 325 pounds. I could Kill you by rolling over."
She huffed a little, but didn't say anything. She wanted more.
"Next, I'm 6"7, and... math has been kind to me. You couldn't handle that."
She was gawking now, appalled at my words, but she still wanted more. A glutton for punishment, apparently...
... Maybe I should amend my last statement.
"Finally, and – Most importantly – You aren't even FIVE FEET TALL. I don't know about you, but I do NOT want to be the person who sees us kissing in the street. Or myself, in that situation."
She glowered at me.
... I've seen shit on the bid.
... I've seen shit in the streets.
... But this, by far, is the most terrifying moment of my life.
"- Name. Now."
"Kanasu Mikaru."
She paused, digesting the name. Her gaze was Icy.
Her words nearly stopped my heart.
"... One day, Mikaru... Maybe not today... Maybe not tomorrow... You and I are going to be alone. And on that day... I will make you eat those words."
She turned, stomping (?) away. She stopped, halfway down the hall, and turned to me.
"Ibarazaki Emi. Remember that name, boy."
She turned again, completing her retreat.
When she was gone, I collapsed onto the ground.
I have never been so scared of sex in my life.
End of Chapter Seven: Behind These Bars, a Shameless Inquisition!
Next Time! Chapter Eight: Behind These Bars, an Arrangement of Necessity!