"I can't believe you get to go see Arcade Fire," Alice complained while we waited for Edward to come pick me up. She'd taken to showing up at my apartment randomly, which I didn't mind. Alice and I were getting much closer, and I considered her a good friend.
"Huh?" I asked, pretending like I hadn't been staring out the window, waiting for the second I'd see his shiny car.
"Um…Edward is taking you to the modern day Woodstock in a few hours…remember your awesome Christmas present?" she asked, placing her hand on her hip.
"Oh, right," I said. "Yeah, I'm excited." In truth, I was very excited, but at the moment, my nerves were on fire. The drive to the concert would take almost four hours, and during that time, I had no idea what would happen.
"We're going to start packing you(r) stuff when you get back, right?" she asked. I'd decided to move into Harry's house. My lease on the apartment was good for another two months, but Harry was moving in two weeks. When I told Alice about it, she jumped at the opportunity to decorate my new home. Since then, she'd been running decorative ideas past me non-stop.
"Yeah, I guess," I said, idly imagining what she could do to my new home.
"I can't wait to see what it looks like," she said, clapping her hands happily. Her moment of excitement was interrupted by a short knock at the door. I stood up and clutched my bag at my side.
"Ugh, I guess you'll be leaving now," Alice said, sulking. "You know, he's always given the best Christmas presents."
I opened the door and my heart stuttered a little in my chest. Edward looked flawless, as usual, even if he was only wearing jeans and a t-shirt.
"You ready to go?" he asked, flashing a crooked grin. Alice huffed in the background.
"Hi, Edward," she said, making her presence known.
"Oh…hi, Alice," he said, somewhat cautiously.
"Don't worry, I'm not crashing your concert, I was just talking with Bella." She turned to grab her coat and keys. "I'll see you guys when you get back," she said, moving past him in the doorway.
"Bye," I called after her, grabbing my coat as well. "Do you need anything before we leave?" I asked, not wanting to be rude.
"Oh, no," Edward said. "I packed food and a few other things in the car, so we should be good to go."
I locked the door and followed him to his car, which he'd parked along the curb. I noticed a few bags in the backseat, as well as some blankets.
"The concert starts at seven, so we should be there in plenty of time to find our seats and get settled," he reminded me. It was a little bit past one when we left, and the further we got away from Seattle, the more relaxed I became. After about an hour in the car, I was beginning to feel ridiculous for being nervous initially—spending time with Edward felt natural. As long as I didn't look at him in his eyes, the butterflies wouldn't start again.
"Let's play a game," I said, turning down the music.
"What kind of game?" he asked, sounding amused. "You don't mean one of those games where you punch me every time you see a type of car, do you?"
I laughed and shook my head. "No, I'm terrible at that one. How about twenty questions?" I immediately thought of a celebrity in my head, positive that he would never guess who I was thinking of.
"Okay," he agreed, raising his eyebrows.
"It's a person." I said, eyeing him coyly.
"Is it a man?"
"Yes," I said, ticking off the questions he had left in my head. He was quiet for a moment, thinking.
"Leonardo DiCaprio."
"What!" I shrieked. "How did you guess? That's not even fair." I glared at him, demanding an explanation.
"I read minds," he said, sarcastically. I continued to glare until he laughed. "I saw you staring at a movie billboard with his face on it. Honestly, it was a lucky guess."
"Fine," I huffed. "You go."
"Okay," he said, shrugging. "Ask away, it's a person as well."
"Is it a woman?" I asked, trying to remain diplomatic. He shook his head.
"Nope."
"Is he a musician?"
"No, he's not a musician," Edward said, keeping his eyes on the road. I looked at him and saw the corner of his mouth twitch slightly.
"Johnny Depp," I said, determined to win in the same fashion that he had. Instead, Edward burst out laughing. I was, as always, caught off guard by the sheer musicality of it, of how his voice was just like velvet.
"No, Bella. I was thinking of Robert De Niro," he said, still laughing. "But he's a good Pirate."
"De Niro?" I said, appalled. "Name the last movie he was in. He's not on any of the billboards."
"He's a good actor," Edward said, "I don't need a billboard to remind me of that."
"Oh, I get it…you just think about him all the time?" I teased. Edward looked at me quickly, his eyes wide.
"I didn't mean it like that!"
Now I felt victorious. I'd successfully embarrassed him.
"Hah," I said, reaching into one of the bags in the back seat and finding a bag of potato chips. I tore open the . After stopping for gas two hours later and more road trip games, we were in Portland. Outside, snow covered the ground, mounded into huge piles created by snow plows. It didn't look much different from Seattle, it was just as crowded and difficult to find a parking lot. Edward managed to find a decent spot that wasn't too far away from the outdoor venue.
"How can they hold such a huge concert like this outside? Won't the equipment get damaged?" I asked tentatively, hoping I didn't sound dumb.
"Well, I'm sure it could happen, but our seats are all elevated, and the stage is pretty high up. Plus, there are heating lamps all around the perimeter. They make bald spots in the snow, and keep the area relatively warm," he explained. He'd grabbed a couple of blankets from the back seat and we walked a couple of blocks until stopping in front of a large crowd.
"What's going on?" I asked, trying to see around all of the people. "Are we too early?" It was almost five o'clock—the concert didn't start for another two hours. Edward, a full head taller than me, was able to see much more than I was.
"For certain people, yes, it's too early. But not for us, we have VIP tickets," he said, searching through the crowd for something. I felt my stomach drop, as I realized just how expensive these tickets had to have been. "Will you wait here for a moment?"
"Sure," I said, "Give me the blankets." He handed them to me and pushed through the crowd. I chewed my lip nervously, beginning to feel a little claustrophobic. The sheer amount of people waiting was overwhelming. Five minutes later, I felt a warm hand on my wrist. I hadn't noticed Edward, who'd returned with a security guard.
"He's going to escort us in," Edward explained, his eyes bright. I looked up and saw a large, bulky man sporting a black t-shirt with the word "Security" printed across it. He smiled and motioned for me to follow him. "Stay close to me," Edward said, holding onto my shoulder. It was nearly impossible to squeeze through the crowd, but once we managed to get past them, the security guard led us through a small door, which opened into a large room that was nearly empty, except for sound equipment.
"Hey guys, I'm Steve," the security guard said. "It's pretty crazy out there, but you two are VIP—if you need anything just come and find me. Seating is through the green door." Then he went back through the original door. I could hear him yelling over the anxious crowd. Poor people—they had to wait and fight with each other while Edward and I got a free pass in.
"You didn't tell me these tickets were VIP," I said, following behind Edward.
"You didn't ask," he responded, simply. A few other people, obviously other VIP ticketholders, were already seated. Edward walked down past several rows of seats, gradually nearing the stage. He stopped two rows away from it and walked down a few seats. "We're right here," he said, looking over at me. I felt frozen, until I forced one of my legs in front of the other.
"Bella?" Edward asked, looking at me carefully.
"These tickets were really expensive," I said, quietly.
"Not really," Edward said, simply. "You shouldn't worry about it, anyway." He sat down in his seat and reached up to grab my hand. Before I knew it had even happened, he'd pulled me down into mine and tossed a blanket on( to) my lap. I promised myself I wouldn't say anything about the cost of the tickets anymore, but I also refused to allow him to pay for anything else.
"Thank you, Edward, the tickets are great."
"I was hoping you'd like them," he said, smiling. "I know we're here early, but it's fun watching them set up. Plus, sometimes, if we're lucky, actual band members wander around out here because they get bored."
We took to just talking for the next hour and a half, but it became increasingly difficult as more and more people began to fill in the arena. Before I knew it, the entire place was set up, all of the speakers and amps on the stage were in place, and unfamiliar band members were getting ready to perform. The concert started.
"You can't stop there!" Jane cried.
"Jane, it's getting late," Peter said, slowly getting up from his chair. It had gotten dark almost an hour ago, and we hadn't eaten.
"Oh, alright," she huffed. "I'll go pull the pie out of the oven, then." Jane had been intermittently preparing dinner all day.
"You'll love her Shepherd's pie," Peter said, waiting for me to follow him into the house. "I hope you like your room."
"My room?" I asked, keeping pace with him as we walked.
"Yes, the room you've been sleeping in…I'd like for you to consider it yours for the time being." He peered at me with an odd expression on his face. I couldn't put my finger on it, but he seemed to be in deep thought.
"Oh, I like it very much," I said, smiling a little too widely. It was getting easier to feel comfortable here, even if I thought my room was much too large. I felt like I should at least be paying rent to be living here.
"I'm glad," Peter said, opening the door for us. In the kitchen, Jane had already set the steaming pie on the countertop to cool.
"The rolls will be ready in five minutes," she said, getting plates and silverware ready. I immediately went to help her and began setting the table. "Thank you, dear." Jane patted my arm when she noticed I'd taken care of the place settings.
"It's no problem, thank you for cooking."
The food was delicious, which didn't surprise me. Jane was a fabulous cook, and I was starting to like being spoiled by her. That night, I slept dreamlessly and woke up feeling stiff and groggy. I had a feeling it was because I went to bed with such a full stomach—I hadn't eaten full meals like that consistently in almost a year.
In the same fashion as the morning before, I started the story exactly where I'd left off last night.
Halfway through the performances, there was an intermission of sorts. I had listened and cheered, completely mesmerized, to the other performances. I jumped in excitement when John Mayer made his presence on stage. Edward whistled loudly at times, just as excited as I was.
"I'm going to get something to drink, do you want anything?" I asked, shouting over the crowd.
"Why don't I go get it for you?" He asked. I narrowed my eyes and shook my head.
"No, stay and keep our seats. I'll be right back!" I hurried past him before he could protest and pushed my way past people toward the concession stands. The air, though it was cold, made me feel refreshed. I'd been standing in line to buy a water bottle for a few minutes when I heard a group of rowdy guys behind me. When I turned around to see who they were, I realized I'd instantly made a mistake.
One of the guys, a bulky man with messy blonde hair, locked eyes with me. Something in his expression instantly changed and he took a step closer toward me. I turned around, pretending like I hadn't seen anything, and urged the line to move faster. Seconds later, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned my head just slightly to look over my shoulder, trying not to look him in the eye.
"Hi," the man said. He stepped forward again, now standing right next to me.
"Hi," I said, shyly. I looked up and the line again and pretended like he didn't exist. That tactic didn't work at all.
"I'm Mike," he said, somehow managing to move closer to me. I moved away from him, trying to be subtle. I smiled, not offering my name in return. Maybe he'd get the hint. "Can I buy you a beer?" He winked.
"Oh, no, that's okay," I said, quickly.
"Aw, c'mon," he said, nudging me. "What's your name?"
"Why do you need to know? I asked, getting irritated.
"Well, how about that beer?" He kept pushing.
"No, really. I don't want one," I said, a little more forcefully. It was then that I noticed his friends were much closer to me than before. I felt panic bubble up in my chest, especially when I realized that no one around me realized what was going on.
"It's just a drink," Mike said, his voice taking on a new edge. I felt one of the men behind me nudge my shoulder.
"No," I said, asserting myself. I raised my voice, trying to move away from them. The water was no longer important to me. Relief briefly coursed through my system when I recognized Steve, the security guard, not too far away from the concession stand. Just as I was about to shout out to him, blaring guitar music began to fill the stadium once more. My cry was washed away. I knew I would have to take matters into my own hands, so I shoved my way past Mike and started to walk back to my seat.
In seconds, he was blocking my path, glaring down at me. "What's your problem?" he demanded. "Are you scared?"
"Quite frankly, you're bothering me," I snapped. "Leave me alone." I went to move past him, again, but he put his hand out to stop me and shoved me back. I stumbled and looked up just in time to see Edward, and his fist flying.
My jaw dropped as he made contact with Mike, sending him reeling. Mike had a good fifty pounds on Edward, but Edward easily delivered a blow, not fazed by it at all. He instantly moved from Mike to check on me and lead us away from the situation. The guys behind us were hollering, and Mike was cursing on the ground.
"Are you alright?" Edward asked into my ear. I nodded and reached down to hold his hand. I felt a shock through my hand when his fingers wrapped around mine. I wondered if I was the only one who felt it—he didn't appear to have noticed anything. "I think we should leave."
I looked up at him, my eyes wide. "What? No, we don't have to leave!" I shouted above the music.
"Bella, you're shaking," he said, leaning closer to me. Then, I noticed that I really was shaking, obviously the result of my nerves from the previous situation. Edward pulled me past some more people and back through the door we came through. It was an immediate relief when I could actually hear myself think.
"Are you sure you're alright?" he asked, again, once we were on the sidewalk away from the arena.
"I'm fine, really. How's your hand?" I asked, picking it up to examine his knuckles. They were swelling.
"My hand is fine," he said, looking me fully in the eye.
"Just to be safe, I think you should put it in the snow for a few minutes," I said, leading him to a large pile of snow next to the building. He allowed me to stick the top of his hand into the snow for a few seconds before he pulled it out and shook it.
"I'll be fine, there's no damage," he insisted. "Let's go back to the car." Panic rose in my chest when I recognized the expression on Edward's face and the tone of his voice. He was angry. I didn't say anything while we walked to the car, even though I felt horrible. I'd ruined the concert for him. I opened my door stiffly and sat quietly in the passenger seat. Edward was silent as well, glaring out the window. I finally worked up enough courage to say something to him.
"Edward, I'm really sorry." My voice was weak, betraying me asalways. He turned to me, his expression softening a little.
"Sorry? Why are you sorry?" he asked, his eyebrows pulling together in confusion.
"I'm sure you really wanted to see the entire concert. I ruined it for you—you can go backif you want, I'll wait here," I said, starting to babble.
"Bella," he said, cutting me off. "I don't care about the concert."
"Then why do you look so upset?" I asked, reeling. He looked just as angry as he did when he first met me.
"Because of what those…animals could have done to you. Because of what that guy was so close to succeeding in doing. No one else even noticed him cornering you, Bella. Do you realize what could have happened if I didn't get there when I did?" His voice was shaking slightly and I noticed his hands were balled into fists. "Even the security guard right next to you was completely oblivious," he hissed.
"Oh," I said, struggling to find something else to say. Edward turned the key in the ignition and pulled out of the parking space.
"We should start driving back," he murmured. "The snow is starting to pick up."
I looked out the window and chewed on my lip nervously, still speechless. We drove in silence for almost an hour. It was the most unbearable sixty minutes of my entire life. It was getting increasingly difficult to see outside—I wondered how Edward was even managing to drive. The windshield wipers weren't doing a very good job of keeping the windshield clean. Eventually, he exited the freeway to stop and clean it himself. When Edward stepped out of the car, a huge gust of wind slammed the door shut behind him. Seconds later, he pulled the door back open and sat down.
"I don't think it's very safe for us to drive back," he said, still brooding.
"I'll get us a hotel room," I said, immediately. Edward was seventeen and not old enough to rent a room. He didn't argue, only turned the car back on and drove until we spotted a nearby hotel. I didn't care how expensive the rooms were, money wasn't an issue for me at the moment. After we'd checked in, I sent a text message to Alice explaining that we were caught in a blizzard and wouldn't be home until tomorrow. Edward didn't seem to be worried about notifying his parents about where we were.
I gave Edward the room key while I stopped at the gift shop to buy a pair of sweats that I could sleep in. He'd insisted that he didn't need anything. My jeans were soaking wet from the small trek we'd made through the snow. There wasn't very much selection, but I found a pair with the hotel's logo on them and a matching t-shirt. I paid for them and planned to order room service as soon as we got settled for the night. In the elevator, I wondered how the sleeping arrangement would work out. The thought of what Edward wore while he was sleeping crossed my mind, causing me to blush. I shook the thought out of my mind and walked down the hall to our room.
Edward opened the door after I'd knocked once. I closed it behind me, trying to ignore the nervous butterflies in my stomach. You aren't sleeping with him, just sharing a room, I promised myself, trying to calm my nerves. It didn't really work. I set down my bag in the corner and stood in the hall, watching Edward sit on the edge of the bed. He was staring out the window, still not saying a word.
"Are you still mad?" I finally asked him. "It honestly isn't that big of a deal. Nothing happened, and I'm fine." I took a few steps closer to him. He looked up, and I was startled by the intensity in his eyes.
"Bella, it is a big deal. Do you have any idea of how much you mean to me?" he asked, standing up from the bed. My stomach twisted into a knot.
"What are you talking about?" I asked, slowly.
"I have to protect you. Because I don't know what I'll do with myself if something happens to you. It doesn't matter that nothing serious happened today, something almost did, and that's enough to make me realize how easy it could be to lose you." His voice was shaking again. I didn't even realize that I was walking toward him.
"Edward?" I asked, turning his attention back to me. He was looking out the window again. Being so close to him made my heart pound uncontrollably. "What are you saying?"
He looked up at me, his eyes a mixture of passion and terror. It was the first time I'd ever seen him look vulnerable like this. "I think I'm in love with you," he whispered.
My breath caught in my throat, and in the next three seconds I was completely unaware of my actions. I had no idea ifhe kissed me, or if I kissed him, but my lips were suddenly pressed against his. I'd been kissed before, but this was completely different. My entire body felt more alive than it ever had, like my veins were electrically charged. I don't know how it was possible, but I pulled away from him, my chest heaving.
"What just happened?" I breathed. I looked up at him, wanting nothing more than to kiss him again.
"I don't know," he said, his voice hoarse. "I'm—" he started to say, but I cut him off by kissing him again. Or at least trying to. The moment my lips came into contact with his again, it was like the electricity started to flow through my veins once more. I stretched onto the tips of my toes and wound my arms around Edward's neck. He surprised me by wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me closer to him, my body now almost flush against his. Edward tasted warm, like cinnamon, and his lips seared my skin wherever they came into contact with it.
I desperately tried to pull myself closer to him, but his arms, much stronger than mine, kept me at the distance I was at. He pulled away this time, leaving me breathless.
"We should stop," he said, just as out of breath as I was.
"You're right," I said, swallowing hard. I was smart enough to know just how fast that could have turned into something more than the kissing we were doing. The bed was only a few feet away. I bit down on my lip and forced myself to meet Edward's gaze. "Should we not have done that?" I asked, terrified that he was going to say yes.
"We probably shouldn't have," he said, sitting down on the bed. "But I really don't care. I don't think you know how long I've wanted that to happen." He looked up at me, the terror dissolved from his now. Now they were just burning emerald pools that made my knees go weak.
"I think I do," I said, quietly. I think I may have even wanted that to happen for longer than he had. He started to say something, but I cut him off. "I'm going to take a shower."
I hurried into the bathroom and locked the door behind me, still breathing unevenly. Then, I realized I'd left my clothes outside. I cursed under my breath and quickly pulled open the door, grabbed my bag from the hallway. I turned on the shower and waited for the water to heat up. There was complimentary soap and shampoo on the counter, so I decided to wash my hair. It always relaxed me.
The water scalded my skin at first, but I quickly got used to it and began to work the shampoo into my hair. The lather didn't smell exactly the way I was used to shampoo smelling, but I was grateful for the comfort anyway. When I got out, my skin was still pink from the heat. I dried off and pulled the tags off the new clothes I'd bought. Then I furiously towel dried my hair, working all of the excess moisture out of it. I didn't have a comb with me, so I settled for throwing my tangled mass of hair into a bun.
Edward was sitting on the sofa in the room, watching TV. He looked up and smiled when I walked into the room.
"You look like a walking advertisement," he said, noting the hotel names on my clothes. I scowled and climbed onto the bed. Edward was craning his neck to look at the screen, which was placed inconveniently across the room.
"You can come up here, you know," I said, patting the spot next to me on the bed. We were only going to watch TV, no big deal.
"Are you sure you're okay with that?" he asked, eyeing me warily.
"I'm fine with it," I said, shyly. Edward climbed on the bed next to me and rested his back against the headrest, his legs out in front of him. My pulse quickened when his hand grazed my knee.
"Sorry," he mumbled. He went back to watching King of The Hill. The question I'd been chewing on suddenly burst out of my mouth.
"Is this going to be awkward now?" I asked, instantly clapping a hand over my mouth. He saw my reaction and chuckled.
"I don't know, Bella. What exactly are we doing?" he asked, his voice completely serious. I could have been a smart-alec and told him we were watching TV, but the question had a completely different implication. Could I be in a relationship with Edward? In truth, I wanted nothing more, but I couldn't admit to him just how scared I was. If things went wrong, I would lose much more than just a good friend.
"I don't know," I said, quietly. Instead, I rested my head on his shoulder and turned my attention back to the television. He didn't say anything either. I didn't know how much time had passed, but I suddenly jolted awake, having fallen asleep on Edward's shoulder. He was in the exact same position he'd been in, still watching TV, only a different show was on now.
"How long have I been asleep?" I asked, scooting up.
"Not too long," he said, looking over at me. It was definitely awkward. But only because I was struggling to control myself. "You should probably get some sleep." He grabbed the remote and switched off the television. He climbed off the bed and began to lay some blankets out of the couch for him to sleep on.
"Are you sure you're okay taking the couch?" I asked, knowing he would say he was perfectly fine with it.
"Yeah, it's not a problem."
I climbed under the covers and fussed with the pillows and tried to get comfortable. I passed in and out of sleep for the next two hours until I couldn't take it anymore. I finally gave in and allowed myself to look at Edward, who was stretched out awkwardly over the couch. Trying to be as quiet as possible, I slid out of bed and stood up next to him.
"Edward?" I whispered. "Are you awake?"
He quickly sat up and looked at me. "Yeah, I'm awake. Is everything okay?" Instead of answering, I reached out and took his hand in mine, pulling him back toward the bed.
"What are you doing?" he asked, putting up little protest.
"You can sleep in the bed with me," I said, still holding on to his hand while I climbed back into the bed. He stood next to me and rubbed the back of his neck.
"Are you sure?" he asked, standing in place. "I'm fine with the couch."
"I don't want you to have to sleep on the sofa, you don't have to." In truth, I just wanted him to be close to me. "I-I can't sleep when you're all the way over there," I said, feeling a blush creep along my cheekbones. I climbed under the covers, praying I wasn't about to do something stupid. He was still wearing his clothes from earlier today. I heard him sigh as he moved a few pillows around.
"I couldn't sleep, either," he admitted. I turned to face him and tried to study him in the dark. It was difficult, but I managed to make out his features. I felt an immense emotion tighten in my chest, and I knew exactly what it was. I didn't know how much time had passed, but I hadn't stopped staring at him. I could feel his warmth next to me, and I was getting lost in the rhythmic pattern of his breathing. I was sure he was asleep by now.
"I love you, too," I whispered, not caring if he heard me or not. It felt right to simply say it. There was no more hiding my feelings now. Everything about this situation, unorthodox as it was, was perfect. He didn't say anything, but seconds later, I felt his arms wind around my waist, pulling me closer to him, and I finally fell asleep.
Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update - school's starting again, so I've had a boat load of stuff to take care of lately. Please let me know if you have any questions or comments- review! And, as always, a shout out and thanks goes to my favorite beta (:
Oh, and I'm sure some of you are thinking, "What the heck! They're moving to fast!", or something along those lines. Just bear in mind that Bella slept with Edward in her bed at about the same point in their relationship in Twilight(the book)...so yeah.