7. Confession
By mid day the institute was bustling with activity in a way that Clary and the others had never seen it before. Groups of shadowhunters came and left the institute, some trained in the larger training rooms and others planned with the heads of the institute.
Not long after breakfast Alec and Jace had disappeared to gather their belongings, as the institute filled up the spaces for lodging dwindled and as a way of organising the mass of people the junior shadowhunters -and Luke- had all been moved to the living area in which Clary and Isabelle already resided.
The hallway that their rooms where situated in could be found down the first hallway to the right from the main entryway, on the left side sat Clary and Isabelle's rooms hidden behind their dark wooden doors along with a small training room and a separate lounge. On the right side of the hallway were the men's rooms and a small kitchen.
"There are a lot of people leaving at the moment." Clary said a little breathlessly as she entered the training room. She was a little late for the training session they had all arranged having been held back by the mass of squads leaving the institute.
"Isabelle I thought you were going to fill Clary in on everything? You guys normally talk a lot, I mean you're good friends and such." Alec asked, his eyebrows raised inquisitively at the dark haired girl. She evaded his gaze, opting to hide behind Jace.
"It might have slipped my mind." Came the suspiciously quiet response. From where she stood, Clary could see Isabelle biting her lip, half hidden behind her exasperated brother. She had hoped to catch Isabelle's eye, to ask herself why the girl had disappeared without speaking with her more, but the girls dark eyes looked anywhere but at her.
"You should explain Alec, Izzy seems to be overly preoccupied with something." Jace said, a sharpness to his words that Clary hadn't heard from him before. She saw Isabelle flinch behind him, seeming to retract further into herself.
"Fine, whatever gets us to what we came here to do faster. Magnus analysed the drug sample that we procured from the warehouse, it's a strange drug it definitely has all the normal qualities of some of the harder narcotics that are distributed in the downworld, except for one thing. There are elements of the drug that under certain circumstances, such as with a high enough dosage, could lead to an almost steroid-like mutation. We're already hearing counts of it's use but luckily Magnus was able to come up with an antidote, we're being advised to take them with us on every mission. It's kind of like a tranquilliser dart." Alec took a drink of water as he finished, his eyes scanning her for a moment before he moved to take up a wooden training sword.
"Well now that's settled, shall we finally get started." Jace said, passing a practice blade to Clary and then Isabelle in turn. "Siblings versus siblings what do you guys say, wanna see who makes the better pair?" Jace said turning to Alec with a playful smile.
"You're on, parabatai, but don't think you'll have the advantage siding with the newest shadowhunter." Alec retorted, moving to stand next to his sister.
"Yeah don't get too cocky, bookworm." Isabelle chipped in, the banter being too irresistible to her playful nature.
"Well at least I wont have the most distracted shadowhunter on my team." Jace shot back, a smug smile plastered over his features.
Just as Jace finished his cocky laugh Alec and Izzy were onto him, firing away with a barrage of well timed and placed jabs and slashes, but though they were fast Jace raised his wooden sword to meet theirs at every blow, foiling their well thought out strategy.
Clary hung back for a moment in awe at the three of them, each reading the others movements. It was almost beautiful to watch, and certainly a learning experience, but Clary couldn't help but remind them all of her presence.
Following them silently across the room Clary applied the runes for quickness and strength, waiting for the opportune moment to separate the pair that assaulted her brother intently. As Isabelle drew back, the snake around her wrist slithering toward the palm of her hand, Clary decided she needed to strike. She leapt forward, wrapping her arms around the girls slim waist and used her entire body weight to pull the girl to the side. They landed with a hard thump, the red haired girl on top, and Isabelle clawed frantically with her right hand, her trusty whip no-where to be seen.
Clary smirked down at the brown haired girl and moved to press the training sword to the exposed skin of Isabelle's neck. The dark outline of Isabelle's active runes appeared very stark against her pale skin and as Clary moved to look at the girl she found her smiling.
"You think you've won but the game is just beginning." Isabelle teased with a wink, and with little effort she pushed Clary off of her, rising to stand in a fighting stance, her sword readied.
Clary pushed the red hair from her face as she righted herself, she was glad that Isabelle seemed to have a bit more of a spark to her now that the game was afoot. It pained her to see the dark haired girl acting differently and so the moments of normalcy between them couldn't come often enough.
Behind them the boys fought on, Alec clearly seemed to be tiring but Jace had enough energy to power an apartment building and fought against the dark haired boy easily, they both relished in the opportunity to train normally.
Launching to the right Clary rushed Isabelle, who sprung into action herself. Their blades met with a loud thwack then held fast, both girls pushing to gain the upper foot. With a final push Clary finally moved Isabelle back, the girl stumbled a second before regaining her footing and when she righted herself and their eyes met Clary could see a myriad of thoughts and emotions flowing through the girl.
"What's going on between us Isabelle?" Clary asked desperately, keeping her voice low so the boys couldn't hear what they were saying. "I've been feeling so strange and.. You've been acting strange too and I'm just so confused." She bit her lip and looked into the girls dark eyes hoping to find a clear answer displayed there.
Isabelle looked away for a moment before lunging forward, slashing downward with a determined force. Clary hurried to protect herself, barely catching the wooden edge of Isabelle's blade with her own.
"I.. Don't know what's going on okay? I don't do feelings. Normally. I mean well I haven't really before if you know what I mean. So. I don't know." Isabelle bit her lip again, staring down at the floor, the pressure behind her blade easing slightly.
It wasn't the answer that Clary wanted to hear. On one hand, it seemed like there was a good chance that Isabelle did have feelings for her, but it also seemed like she didn't know how to deal with them. It was a conflicting piece of information to know, at this point Clary was coming to terms with her feelings for Isabelle and though she wasn't exactly aching to find herself in another relationship so soon after everything that had happened with Jace, but the thought of never having a chance with the girl scared Clary to no end.
"Isabelle.. I.."
"Don't! Don't do it!" Isabelle shouted suddenly, jumping back and raising her sword. "Clary Fray you can save that kind of talk for IF you beat me." She said sternly, whacking Clary's knee hard with the wooden stick she wielded.
Clary recoiled in pain and grasped her knee with her free hand, grasping the throbbing area.
"Ouch Izzy, got some BITE." Jace catcalled from the other side of the room, leaning casually against the wall from where he watched.
"Oh I'm glad you find this entertaining." Clary said sarcastically, eyeing her brother with disdain. He chuckled in response and Alec sighed from his position on the floor next to him, his legs crossed as he eyed the girls with interest.
"I'm over here Clary." Isabelle singsonged, prowling in a large arc around the girl to catch her attention. Clary readied herself again as the dark haired girl drew nearer, mentally scolding herself for not paying attention.
They came at each-other again, both dancing to avoid well placed swings as they danced back and forth across the room. It didn't take long for Clary to begin to read Isabelle's movements through her body language, and their fighting began to become intense. Clary managed to get a few hits in, striking the dark haired girls shoulder and back, though she received a hard hit to the back of the neck in return.
They battled on until they both began to sweat, both breathing heavily as they circled each-other, sore and exhausted.
It finally ended when Isabelle leapt forward and Clary reading her movements stepped to the side, she grabbed the dark haired girls wrist and used her foot to bring the girl to the ground. She wrestled the wooden stick from Isabelle's arms and moved to straddle her, effectively trapping the girl beneath her. Clary's thighs pressed tightly against Isabelle's hips and she leaned forward to look at the girl. Their eyes caught for a moment that seemed to last a lifetime and as she looked into Isabelle's eyes she could feel herself being pulled in. As their noses touched both girls grounded themselves in reality again, and Clary hastily pulled away from the girl
Isabelle struggled profusely to no avail, a hint of fear reflecting in her dark eyes. Finally she relaxed, going still on the thick padded floor.
"I like you Isabelle, as more than a friend." Clary said quietly before standing to put her training sword back on the rack that it came from. She didn't miss the dark red blush on Isabelle's face as she left.
"Well I guess you win then." Isabelle said, finally righting herself as she joined her brothers.
"Yeah, but I really don't feel like it." Jace remarked, the sadness in his voice unmissable. He gave Clary a long look before he left the room without another word.
"I'm sorry, I'll go talk to him. Don't worry about Jace he'll be fine." Alec gave them both an uneasy smile before he too left.
"Isabelle I'm sorry." Clary said as the door to the training room swung shut, she felt bad that Jace was hurting over what she had said and done just then in front of him, but the pull she felt with Isabelle left no room for argument, and Clary felt like she needed admit her feelings to the dark haired girl sooner rather than later. She moved to stand in front of the girl. She placed her finger under the dark haired girls chin in order to catch her eyes. "I know it's not what you wanted to hear right now, but it's true. I can't deny it any more than I can deny the calling of my angel blood. I'm not telling you because I want to jump into a relationship with you right now though, I'm telling you because keeping it to myself is just so hard, and I don't want to lie to myself."
Isabelle was quiet for a moment, seeming to mull over Clary's words in her mind trying to come up with a response. "This is hard." She said finally, worrying her lip between her teeth. It was easy to see that Isabelle was struggling.
"You don't have to say anything to me just now Izzy." She said affectionately, caressing Isabelle's jawline with her thumb. "You don't have to do anything that you don't want to, I don't mind waiting for you to figure out what you're feeling." She gave Isabelle a sad smile, her hand dropping to her side. She ached to reach out and pull the taller girl close, to reassure her, but she knew it wasn't a good idea.
"Thank you Clary. You really are sweet." Isabelle replied softly, she was grateful but still seemed a little hurt and Clary's heart began to ache. Isabelle smiled sadly at Clary one last time before she left the room, leaving Clary alone with her thoughts.
When she made it back to her room Clary immediately made her way to her bed and flopped dramatically onto it. Their squad wouldn't be assigned to missions for another few days while they trained together, and with time to spare after the session they had just had Clary could think of nothing better to do than crawl into her bed and wallow in her overly mature choices.
She knew that Isabelle had never really had a serious relationship, she had heard of the girls various flings with different downworlders but as far as Clary knew the dark haired girl had never seen the same person twice. She knew the girl would need time to adjust to the feelings that now occupied a space in her heart, but the more time they spent around each-other the more Clary wanted to be with the girl. It was true it hadn't really been that long since she had been with Jace, but they also hadn't really been together that long, and her feelings for Isabelle infected and spread throughout her, occupying more and more of her thoughts with each passing interaction.
Rolling onto her back she grabbed her phone from the surface beside her bed and unlocked it with practised precision. She felt the overwhelming urge to talk to Simon, her dorky and understanding amazing best friend. He would offer her some sage advice and point her on the right path, he always did.
She opened her contacts and scrolled through the names, stopping at the 'S' section to tap on Simon's name. She pressed the call button and waited patiently. She became increasingly nervous as the phone rang. Simon always picked up on the second or third ring, it wasn't like him not to pick up, and since his phone seemed to be ringing out that indicated that it still had battery and was turned on.
Her leg began to jiggle absentmindedly as she pressed her thumb against the call button again. It was possible that he was just on the toilet, or something to that affect.
Deciding to wait a few minutes before calling again she crossed the room to her desk and retrieved a can of soda. Taking a seat at her desk she placed her phone next to her and half-heartedly began adjusting the picture of the sword that she had drawn before, an uneasy feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.
Once she finished her can and she felt a sufficient amount of time had passed she called Simon again. Yielding the same response she began to freak out, hammering the call button again.
When it again rang out she jumped to her feet, her chair flying out behind her, her phone slipping from her hand to land on the hard floor.
"Simon." She whispered, before taking off to find help.