"Come on in, Deanna," Judith called already knowing whose presence the door chime announced.
The dark-haired woman entered, laughing as she said, "I thought I was the empathic one around here."
"Well, there's empathic and there's empathic," came the reply along with an unspoken indication to take a seat. "There's also the fact that you're supposed to be here right now, so that raised the odds of me being right."
Judith dropped heavily into an overstuffed chair, propped her feet on the low table in front of her, leaned her head back and closed her eyes. Career-wise it might not be appropriate for her to appear so casual in front of her boss, but she was in her own quarters and she intended to relax.
Seated on the sofa, Deanna remained silent as well, impressed by the young woman's ability to be so at ease. She also sensed a touch of defiance and liked that, too.
The Betazoid counselor was only now, after six weeks, willing to fully concede that the petite blonde was capable of handling such a difficult case - and the challenge of dealing with Beverly/Rosemary.
A painful image flashed into Deanna's mind.
When Beverly awoke in Sickbay after her foiled escape attempt, her hysteria reached new proportions. As though a wild animal had suddenly been caged, there was a genuine concern that she might injure herself as she struggled against the restraining field.
Before she could cross the room to her friend's side, Deanna was astonished to feel a singularly calm and centered presence enter the chaotic scene. She was further surprised to see that it was Judith McKenna.
Having softly bid the medical staff to give her some room, Judith was standing silently next to the biobed. Beverly stopped struggling although she remained tense.
"My name is Judith," the young woman said in a voice that was soothing and non-patronizing. "Do you know who you are or where you are?"
Beverly shook her head, her eyes darkening in confusion.
"That's okay. You're in the Sickbay of the starship Enterprise. You know that you were injured?" She received a nod in response. "Your physical injuries have been healed, but you have amnesia, which is why you don't know who you are. There are many people here who want to help you if you will let us, but we have to be able to trust you as much as we want you to be able to trust us. I can release the restraining field and let you sit up, but only if you promise not to try to run again."
"Please."
Heartrending in its plaintiveness, it was the first word Beverly had spoken since she woke up that wasn't a scream.
Judith adjusted the controls, and Beverly tentatively moved her arms and legs, testing to see if the invisible barrier was truly gone. Her relief at finding that her movements were no longer restricted was almost tangible. She allowed Judith to help her sit up, but when she tried to slide off the bed, a gentle hand was placed on her shoulder.
"No running, remember?" Judith cautioned.
Hoarse from her previous screams, Beverly's voice cracked as she pleaded, "Please let me go. I have to get away."
"From?"
"From here."
"Where will you go?"
They were simple questions, asked with seemingly honest interest and no hostility, and yet they clearly chafed at her nerves, made her edgy.
"I don't know." Beverly rubbed her temple, then up to her forehead, trying to dispel some of the new tension brought on by the effort to find answers she didn't have. "I just have to get away."
"Leaving the Enterprise isn't possible right now," Judith said matter-of-factly, "but how about we move you into one of the private rooms? Then you won't be quite so 'on display'."
A fleeting smile was all Beverly could manage.
"Are you hungry?" After another weak nod, Judith turned to one of the nurses nearby. "Could you get her something light to eat and maybe something to wear other than this gown?"
The nurse hurried away, anxious to help in any way.
The sight of the usually confident doctor being meekly led away by the woman who was a full head shorter than she was would have been comical if it wasn't so tragic. Deanna choked down a moan as she watched the departing duo. Remembering her duties as ship's counselor, she took the tray of food and fresh pajamas the nurse had brought and followed them.
Standing just outside the door, Deanna watched the occupants of the tiny room. Despite the presence of a bed and two chairs, both women remained standing... or rather, Judith stood while Beverly continued to move around the room. Her steps were short and jerky, her legs still wobbly after the sedation and her emotional outburst.
Trapped
The feeling fairly screamed at Deanna.
Beverly rubbed her temple as she had earlier.
"Are you in pain?" Judith asked. "We can give you something for it..."
"No!" Beverly whirled to face her, nearly losing her balance as her unsteady legs tried to keep up with the abrupt movement. "I have to stay awake."
"Staying awake is better," Judith responded with a small smile to Beverly's surprise at the easy agreement, "but that doesn't mean you have to do it in pain. We can give you a hypo."
"A what?"
"A hypo. It dispenses medicine directly into the bloodstream."
"That hissing thing? No, thank you, I'll live with the pain. At least then I know I'll stay awake."
"Beverly, you don't have to..."
"Don't call me that! I don't like it."
"Why?"
She hesitated for a moment but could offer no better answer than the one she had already given. "I don't like it."
Judith accepted the vague reasoning, seemingly unconcerned. "All right, what would you prefer to be called?"
Her reply, although there wasn't going to be much of one, went unspoken as she caught sight of the dark-haired woman in the doorway. Unconsciously, she backed away.
Deanna tried to smile as she raised the mental shields that would close out the sudden wave of fear emanating from her friend.
Fear that had subsided until she had seen Deanna.
"Food and fresh clothes... just what the doctor ordered." Deanna had tried for cheery, but it came out decidedly forced.
Accusing blues eyes turned to Judith. "You're a doctor?"
"A counselor actually."
"I'm not crazy." The insistence was firm, definitive.
"No one said you were. However, you are in, to say the least, a confusing situation, and I would like to help you deal with it. Unless you'd prefer to work with Counselor Troi?"
Beverly's emphatically negative rejoinder rang in Deanna's ears...
"...for you?"
Deanna blinked, the dark memory still clinging to the edges of her mind. She looked up to see that Judith had risen from her chair and gone to the replicator.
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"I'm having coffee... hot chocolate for you?"
"No, thanks. I've had too much chocolate since this whole thing started. Lemon tea, please." Deanna rested her head on the back of the couch, trying to relax.
"Hmm."
"Hmm, what?" She, of all people, knew a counselor's non-comment when she heard one.
"Just 'hmm'."
"I use that technique myself. What are you trying to get at?"
Judith gave her a knowing look along with the teacup. "Isn't lemon tea Beverly's favorite drink?"
"Is it?" Deanna hedged.
"I distinctly remember you telling me that after a session when Rosemary drank orange juice instead. So why did you choose it now?"
Deanna shifted uncomfortably in her seat. One of the curses of her job was the rare occasion when the tables were turned and the counselor became the counseled. "I came here to discuss Beverly, not me."
"Why shouldn't we talk about you in relation to Beverly?" Judith demanded. "I've been working with Rosemary, and you've been dealing with the senior staff, but who have you talked to about 'this whole thing'? You were thinking about Beverly a minute ago when you were so far away, weren't you?"
Taking another sip of tea was a stall tactic, then with a faint grimace, Deanna set the cup aside. She didn't care for tea, and Judith had hit the mark in concluding that she had chosen it for the tenuous connection to Beverly.
She missed her friend - their talks, their commiserations, their laughs. She always thought Beverly had the best laugh, open and easy. 'Rosemary probably has the same laugh, but there isn't much chance that I'll ever hear it since Rosemary barely tolerates the sight of me.'
"Everybody hates the Egelloc for what they did to Beverly," she said suddenly. "I hate them for what they took away from me. I know that's completely selfish, and I still can't help it. When I sense her, it's not what I'm used to getting from Beverly. She was... is my best friend, but this part of her... well, Rosemary may not hate me in so many words..."
"Yet she has shown a marked aversion to you," Judith finished for her. "I've been working on that, too. None of the crew is substantially different from the way Beverly left them, but Rosemary's reaction to you is different. She has gotten used to the medical staff - so long as she sees them outside of Sickbay - and she has made friends with the senior officers, especially the Captain and Geordi."
"So her only problems are complete amnesia about her life as Beverly Crusher, a fear of Sickbay..." she hesitated before finishing sadly, "and me. Not the company I'm used to keeping."
"Perhaps the difference is that you've only spent time with her in a professional capacity," Judith mused aloud. "Why don't you try a social situation, one with a few people she already feels comfortable with?"
"Social?" Deanna said primly. "Don't you think that's blurring the lines a bit at this point?"
Judith rolled her eyes melodramatically. "She's my patient, not yours, so there are no lines to blur. Now, do you want your friend back or not?"
"Ouch! You're good! Yes, I do want my friend back." She paused then grinned. "Now my question to you is - are you trying to help me or do you want my job?"
Both women laughed. It was the first nearly light-hearted moment either one of them had had since Rosemary's arrival.
Without further urging, Deanna began to talk - what she knew of Beverly's life that wasn't in the service record; the adventures, trials and tribulations they had shared together, and personal insights that come only from a close friend.
Judith learned a good deal about the doctor who was CMO of the Enterprise... and about the woman whose welfare was of such great concern to virtually everyone on board.
-tbc-