well, here the next installment for my very first fic... hehehe! sorry guys if it took long before i updated... i was at the province with no internet connections... peace guys!

for those who reviewed my fics, i'm really gratefull... hope you guys keep it coming... hearing from you really makes me feel good about writing! tnx!

disclaimer: standard disclaimer applied...

here goes...

Chapter 6:

I will love again,

though my heart is breaking

I know I'm supposed to love again…

How come… it doesn't feel right?

"So, would you give me a chance?"

His voice was pleading against the crash of tide against the surf from the open sea a few meters from the seaside restaurant he had promised to take her. She looked up at him from the platter of food before her and met his pale blue eyes looking at her intensely. Suddenly, she realized that a half way eaten platter was nicer to look at than those intense and rare pale blue eyes.

Another strong wave crushed against the surf once again, reminding her of the silence that was engulfing them and the fact that he was waiting for her to answer. Heaving out a deep sigh, she forced herself to look up and meet his intense gaze the way a brave soldier would meet his own death. Still, those pale blue eyes were softly pleading her, never a change of emotion since she last look up on them.

"Fuuko…"

And his voice sounded pleading as well to the point that no one would ever believe her in case she told them that Kurei, flame caster and leader of Uruha, pleaded her to give him a chance.

"Fuuko, it's okay if—"

"Yes." She cut his words with her own voice, though she wasn't really sure that it was really her voice who just said that.

She let out that one word, that very word that might just change her life and help her fully recover from Raiha's death. All it took was one single breath and voicing out what she wanted to say, or rather, what she thinks she has to say. It all seemed so easy yet it was one of the hardest things she had ever done in her entire life. It was hard for her to say yes, not because it was Kurei who was asking her. In fact, she would gladly say yes to him even if he asked her years ago… before she had said yes to Raiha.

"Are you sure Fuuko?" he asked her once again as if he heard it wrong.

She smiled and gave him a quick nod. "Of course I am. You asked for a chance and I'm giving it to you."

The next moment, she found her hands encased in his and she was once again the object of those intense eyes.

"Thank you." he said, squeezing her hand softly.

She just gave him a warm smile while a thought continued to linger in her head.

Is this the right thing to do?

If it is, then how come it feels so…

Wrong?

After the lunch they had, she was invited to go with him to stroll by the seaside. Not just an ordinary stroll but the one that lovers do in movies, holding hands with the leading man while watching the sunset beyond the horizon and feeling the warm water on their feet. She didn't do much to protest, in fact she was beginning to enjoy the moment, not because she was holding his hand or something, but because she was enjoying the little chatter they were having. He has his way of making things perfect for her. He was making her feel secured, complete, even…

Yet somehow, she wasn't feeling any of those. Not because of the Raiha thing, she was over that just like the way she promised herself she would be. It was something else, something that Kurei, can't make her feel or can make her have despite the way he makes everything perfect for her.

She was feeling strange, not in its romantic sense but in its normal sense. Yet she still manages to listen to every word he was saying and looking as if she was hanging onto every word that was coming out of his lips while thinking of the predicament she had put herself into.

The next moment, she found herself sitting on top of a boulder of rock overlooking the dark blue sea while Kurei was sitting beside her, looking towards the horizon and watching the sunset, giving the bluish water an orange shade that fits to perfection. The wind was gently breezing through, softly tumbling their hair and softly caressing their cheeks.

Slowly, Fuuko turned her gaze to Kurei's direction and watched as his chiseled face looked so calm against the setting sun. Not to mention how handsome he looked like with his hair softly dancing with the wind. She tried to trace every feature of his face, searching for something she couldn't name yet determined to find to assure herself she didn't made the wrong decision. Her brows furrowed as she searched deeper, hoping that if she did, she'll be able to find something and she would be assured of her decision.

The next second, she was staring onto his pale blue eyes with a hint of amusement in them which she can't define from where.

"Why are you staring at me?" he asked that completely caught her off guard.

Quickly, she withdrew her gaze, embarrassed that he had caught her doing such act, and stammered to answer his question.

"I was… ah… just… thinking about something." She stuttered while avoiding his gaze.

However, he wasn't going to let her off that easily for he gently cupped her face and forced them to turn to him. Still, she averted her gaze, refusing to meet his own to hide her own embarrassment and to avoid looking again at them.

"Look at me Fuuko." He said, his voice sounded pleading once again yet it felt like he was commanding her to do so.

Slowly, she forced herself to meet his gaze and the moment she did, those eyes smiled back at her for reasons she doesn't know.

"What are you thinking?" she asked, eager to know what was going in his mind and wanting to grope it in her hands.

She watched as his lips twitched upward, revealing to her one of his famous smiles that would simply make every girl who receives them swoon right in front of him. But she wasn't just every girl so he can't expect to see her swooning right then and there. She would rather die than to swoon right in front of any guy or anyone for that matter. Fuuko Kirisawa never and would never swoon, devastated or not, depressed or not.

"I am thinking of how I feel when you look at me like that." He said, gently bringing the hand that was cupping her face earlier to her forehead and softly caressing downwards, leaving burning sensation on the path that his fingers took. "And I am thinking of wanting to kiss you..."

Slowly, he was inching towards her, determined to close the gap between their lips and seal whatever it was that she told him a while ago about giving him a chance of having a place in her heart. She wanted to pull away and just walk away from him yet something hold her back, making her wanting to anticipate the moment that his lips would descend upon hers and probably when they did, she would find that one thing she was looking for a while ago.

She watched through half lidded eyes as his face inched closer, slightly tilting his head to avoid their nose crushing against each other and destroying the moment he had established. When his lips was just a mere millimeters from hers, she let those half lidded eyes fully close and waited for his lips to slowly touch hers. Not a second later, she felt his soft, warm lips against hers, gently touching for a mere second before he broke the contact but never drawing back an inch farther from her. He still held her there only, their lips are now once again a mere millimeters from each other.

Silently, she searched deep inside her for anything that will tell her this was the right thing to do. However, no matter how hard she searched and no matter how much she assured herself that she is doing the right thing, she can't help but feel that none of this was right.

Gently she opened her eyes to find the assurance she needed in his eyes and saw that Kurei also did but before one of them could even say anything else or react on what just transpired between them, another voice broke the silence between them that made them abruptly turn towards the direction of the voice.

"I never knew you had it in you niichan!" Recca said with a slight glimmer in his eyes.

Obviously, he had seen them after they kissed and not only him, when her gaze traveled behind Recca, she noticed that the whole Hokage was standing behind him and looking the same, except for Tokiya of course, who was once again having an unreadable expression on his face.

Quickly she pulled away and diverted her gaze somewhere else where they wouldn't see the blood going up to her cheeks.

"Ow come on Fuuko! You don't have to be shy!" Recca shouted while sniggering with amazement.

"Shut up Recca!" Fuuko glared at him. "What are you guys doing here anyway?"

"Didn't you know?"

"Know what?" her eyebrows furrowed at Recca's reaction.

"Kurei asked us to stay here for the weekend. He had us booked in a hotel near here so we can spend all weekend near the beach. Even the Uruha's are here." Yanagi explained for Recca.

"I see." She said, feeling slightly glad that, at least, the rest of the Uruha wasn't there to witness what they had witnessed.

"Don't worry! I promise not to disturb you and niichan during your private moments!" Recca teased her which just earned him more glare from Fuuko.

"I thought I told you to shut up!" Fuuko shouted at his direction and abruptly stood up before stalking away from the group.

Just when she was about to pass Tokiya, something made her meet his gaze and look into his eyes as if some magnet just drawn her to him. His face was much less the same, impassive. Yet there was something in his eyes that made her slow down walking so she could take her time staring at them and figure out what was it.

Was it pain?

She tried to figure it out but she was already side by side with him and was already passing him. She wanted to turn her head back, she felt the burning urge to turn around and seek those baby blue eyes once again until she could figure out what was that in his eyes that made her want to look at them like that.

No… it can't be pain… he never feels those kinds of emotions…

She convinced herself before dragging herself away from the embarrassing situation.

Tokiya closed the door to his suite with a loud thud before stalking towards the fridge and pulling out a can of beer. He then proceeded towards the window and looked at the view outside.

From his window located at the fifteenth floor, he could clearly see the outline of the long stretch of sandy beach before him. At the horizon, the sun was almost gone, giving the sea a dark orange, almost red even, shade. The sky, except for the part that was near the setting sun, was almost in dark blue, waiting for the sun to set and let the velvet color take over it. The sandy beach was still packed with few people eager to taste the water on their bodies despite the sun almost set. And the water, it was peaceful, not like that afternoon when all you can see are the big tides crashing against the shore. The water was barely moving, almost still even, giving whoever who'll look at them a sense of calmness and serenity.

But Tokiya Mikagami isn't feeling anything but calm. He was raging inside for reason he couldn't figure out. He suddenly has the urge to bang his head on the glass window or break the glass into tiny splinters, so tiny that no one would recognize a shard of glass on the carpeted floor. He suddenly wants to dull his senses with alcohol until his world was spinning and he'll be oblivious of the other things around him. The reason why he wanted to do those things, he doesn't know and that's what making him more annoyed than ever.

"Why do you look so annoyed?" a very familiar voice suddenly cut the thoughts going on his head.

Upon hearing the voice, he couldn't help but utter out a silent curse and watched through the glass window as Kagero's figure appeared behind him from the shadows in the living room. He saw that smirk on her face and he can't help but use almost all his strength not to turn around and throw the empty can of beer in his hands at her. Rude and so not like him, yes, but he was tired of her popping in his room every time he needs to be alone to think.

"Is it because of what—" she continued when he didn't made an attempt to answer her question earlier.

"Look, I don't have time for this." He cut her sentence, still not bothering to turn around and look at her for he was afraid that if he does, he'll just end up hurling the can of beer in his hands towards the direction of the immortal woman.

"Of course you do." Her voice was taunting him. "You saw what everyone else saw back there at the beach. It is what's making you look so annoyed. You can't hide it anymore from me."

He stifled a retort at the immortal woman's words. What the hell is she talking about? Why would that incident at the beach bother, or rather, annoy him so much? So what if Kurei just kissed Fuuko. Why would he bother anyway?

"Because you love her." Kagero, who seems to be reading his thoughts, answered for him.

This time, Tokiya abruptly turned around and glared at the woman before him. Lucky for her he still have a little respect left for her that he didn't hurl the can of beer in his hand towards her.

"What did you say?" he said in a cold voice, so cold that despite Kagero being immune to this part of Tokiya, he still manages to make shivers ran down the spine of the woman.

"You love her." she repeated, only making him more annoyed.

This time, to release the pent up emotions he was feeling, he crushed the can of beer in his hand until it was just a crumpled piece of crap. Why was he so annoyed anyway? Why does he keep on hiding it from himself? Why not just admit it and be done with it?

Because you'll just hurt yourself, baka! She's together with Kurei, remember?

"So? I can't do anything about it now." He spat out bitterly, admitting his own loss and his own stupidity for not realizing it until now, now that it's too late.

"Yes you can… listen to your heart and let it tell you what to do…"

And with that, the immortal woman left him in peace and silence he had been seeking a few minutes back.

Seeing that she had disappeared back in the shadows, he bitterly turned around and watched the view before him presented by the transparent glass of window. But this time, the view nor the color of the sky nor the way the water crashed against the shore didn't even registered in his mind for it was occupied by something else, or rather someone else. A certain purple haired monkey that used to annoy him with her company despite the fact that he kept on keeping it from himself that he was actually enjoying it. The former team mate during the UBS that used to give him friendly gestures, that of which the rest couldn't show him for he might just lash out on them, despite the fact that those were actually the same things that made him fall for her like this. The former Fuujin master that used to engage with him in a witty verbal swords play only to find out that those were the same things that made him respect her wit and her effort of making him act like a normal person would even just for once in a while.

He had fallen for her fast and hard but he was too stupid to even realize that. He clouded his thoughts with his work just to get his mind off the thought of her and to numb his feelings for her. However, instead of numbing it the way he wanted to, he end up making it grow deeper than he had expected to the point that he was beginning to lose his cool and let the immortal woman read his thoughts like an open book.

And now, it's too late for him. She was with Kurei now, just like the way she was with Raiha before and he wasn't able to do anything. Besides, how the hell is he supposed to confess something like that to her? And worst, would she even believe him? It was never in his nature to feel anything like that and go up and confess it to his object of affection. By the time he'll find the way how to tell her, she might even be married to Kurei already making it very late to do so. He was never good at these kinds of things and he would rather shut his trap than confuse her with what he would be saying.

A bitter smirk worked its way across his face. Here he was, finally feeling something other than anger and revenge, and he can't even tell the person that. He had fallen for the very first time in his life, loved someone more than his life ever since his sister died and he will not do anything about it. For the first time in his life, no matter how smart people think he is for always figuring out the right thing to do at any given situation, he was lost and couldn't think of anything to do in his current predicament than just keep silent and wait for things to happen around him.

He watched as she busily ate her dinner opposite from him, constantly chatting with the rest of the group and laughing on their silly jokes. She would glance at him from time to time and smile so tenderly the way she never smiled with any of the group before then would bow her head and try to hide the blush that was creeping up her cheeks. But he sees it anyway and it only makes him smile at her naivety. Even at the time that he was holding up his glass of red wine, he still couldn't help but watch her through the red liquid in his glass, watching how good her complexion looked in red, the color of blood. He was so fond of watching her that he had barely touched his food and consumed little of his wine while the plates of the rest are almost empty and ready for a second filling, in case of Recca, that is. He even barely heard what the conversation going on around the table is, nor the silly joke that Recca was telling the group, nor who was laughing at whose joke. All he was aware was the way Fuuko was laughing at what they were saying, and the way her cobalt orbs seems to smile back and laughing as freely as her.

"Kurei-sama…"

Kurei snapped out from the spell of Fuuko's laughter when a feminine voice called him and tapped his shoulder. He looked beside him and saw that Neon was looking at him worriedly. Beside her, Joker was also looking back at him, not worriedly, however. He was looking at him with amused glitter on his eyes and a knowing smile on his face.

"Are you alright?" Neon asked again, mistaking his lack of contribution to the discussion was due to something bothering him or he doesn't like. "You seem rather preoccupied."

He smiled at Neon while he straightened up in his seat. "Yes, I'm fine. I was just thinking of something."

"Don't you mean someone?" Joker joined in their discussion still with that knowing smile on his lips.

He threw him a glare which he completely ignored as he watched as his eyes traveled to Fuuko, who was now talking with Tokiya despite the way the other wouldn't cooperate at all, and then back again to him. Still with the glare on his face, he snorted before turning back to face those in the table so as not to interrupt the others and avoid drawing the attention of his comrades.

This time, Tokiya and Fuuko are both exchanging death glares and at each other's throat. From the looks of it, both must have lost control over them selves and ended up throwing insults at each other that just pissed them off. Recca and the others are all sweatdropping and attempting to stop what is about to occur between the two former madougu wielders.

"Fuu—" Kurei was about to calm Fuuko down but was dumbfounded to even speak at what Fuuko did next.

With eyes almost as wide as the saucer plate of the coffee cup on the table, Kurei watched as Fuuko's face suddenly changed. The glare she was giving Tokiya changed into a warm smile, that of which he haven't seen in such a long time. But that wasn't the one that surprised him the most. What surprised him was when Fuuko leaned over and gave Tokiya a quick peck on the cheek.

Of course, it might sound so petty but it was the way Fuuko looked before she kissed Tokiya and the way she looked after that surprised him the most. It was different in some way though he just couldn't put his finger on it.

"Mi-chan, I never knew how much I missed that glare of yours." He heard Fuuko whisper to the surprised Tokiya beside her.

Instead of throwing another glare back at her, however, he saw Tokiya quickly stand up from his seat and turned his back on them. Curious at the sudden actions of the former Ensui wielder, Kurei asked him.

"Where are you going Mikagami?"

"The bathroom. I need to wash away monkey flees that my skin caught." He answered coldly before stalking towards the bathroom.

Kurei saw Fuuko stick her tongue out at his back but he noticed something that almost made him wonder. Before Tokiya turned around to leave for the restroom, he noticed a slight pinkish blush creeping up his cheeks and he couldn't help but wonder if it has anything to do with the intimate contact that Fuuko gave him.

well... what do you think? too fast? hehehe! well, i just hope you like it... please oh please don't forget to review... it's really nice to hear from you guys...

till the next chap!